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Scott’s hands are shaking and his palms are sweaty. No matter how many times he wipes them against his jeans, they just keep getting slicker and he eventually gives up after the fifth try. There’s a knot in his stomach and the lump in his throat feels huge, like at any moment it’s going to grow even larger and cut off his air supply.
And Scott knows that if he were human, he’d be throwing up on his shoes just from how nervous he is.
The reason for his nerves is sitting on the table: a small jeweler’s box that’s wrapped in dark velvet and holding a simple, silver band. The ring is the most important purchase that Scott has ever made in his life; he saved up for a year and a half, scrimping on everything he could and even foregoing certain luxuries just to tuck some money away.
It’s not the most extravagant thing in the world and it’s not even the most expensive, but both his mom and Sheriff Stilinski said that Stiles would love it. What cost the most, however, was the inscription Scott got written on the inside of the band, a motto he and Stiles have been saying for years: “you’ve still got me”.
Those words still ring true, even five years after Scott’s transformation, and he thinks about all the things they’ve been through together — both the good and the bad.
In the past five years, Scott and Stiles have been through a lot of things that people their age shouldn’t have to deal with. Being a werewolf; dealing with other wolves and… giant lizards; having to watch people die; nearly dying themselves; and burying people they cared about.
But, through all of those things, Stiles never left Scott’s side for a second, not even when he was being a douche whenever Allison was around. Scott soon came to realize that he would always have Stiles, no matter what happened, and that other people came and went.
When the Alpha pack came into town and slaughtered half of their pack, the two of them clung to one another more than before. They were two of the only members left, with Isaac, Boyd, and Lydia, so they made their own little pack but promised to keep the memories of their fallen friends alive.
One of the ways they did this was rebuilding the old Hale house. It happened the summer after Derek, Jackson, and Erica died. Everyone pitched in and the project took a lot of time, as well as money, but they managed to bring the house back to life.
Isaac became their new Alpha and the house soon became a home for all of them, their things piled up into rooms and their scents in every corner of the house. Sometimes, Scott thinks he can still see Derek scowling in the corner; he thinks he can smell Erica’s perfume and hear Jackson complaining.
To say he misses his old pack is an understatement but Scott knows they’re all moving forward to build a new one. A few betas have come from different packs and joined them; Peter’s even stayed, though Scott can see how losing his entire family has affected him.
So, the future looks good and Scott wants to take the first step toward building a new life with Stiles. Except he doesn’t see it as a step, more like a leap off a ten story building with no certainty of what’s waiting for him at the bottom. But he’s completely okay with taking that leap of faith and prays that Stiles is there, waiting and ready to marry him.
*
It takes Scott a while to get himself together. He plays with the box in his hands and looks down at it, running a fingertip along the top, shivering at the feel of velvet underneath his skin. When Scott hears the Jeep pull into the driveway, he shoves the box into the pocket of his jeans and walks outside.
The sun is just starting to sink behind the trees and the sky changes colours, going from a brilliant blue to a deep purple-red-orange colour. It’s the perfect time to pop the question, Scott thinks, and he walks off the porch, smiling brightly at Stiles when he gets out of his car.
“You smell like glue,” he points out and grins when Stiles scowls at him, shaking his head to cause tiny flecks of glitter fall off his shoulders. “Did the kids attack you with glue and glitter again?”
Stiles scoffs and shakes his head, coming forward with his arms extended, wrapping them around Scott as soon as he can. “I might have attacked them with glitter and glue, you never know.”
A laugh bubbles up from Scott’s throat and he shakes his head, burying his face against the side of Stiles’, inhaling deeply. He smells like he normally does: like sugar, spices, Old Spice body spray, glue, glitter, and too many people that it makes Scott jealous at first — until he remembers that Stiles is around children all day. There’s also a hint of the sheriff on the other man and Scott can’t help but smile.
“You wanna go for a walk?”
“Right now?” Stiles asks, his voice more like a whine, and he clings to his boyfriend, pressing his face against the middle of Scott’s chest.
Scott moves a hand to Stiles’ hair and runs his fingers through it, thankful that he grew it out and kept it that way. Don’t get him wrong, he likes Stiles with a buzz cut, too, but now there’s something for him to play with whenever he wants.
“Well, we don’t have to do it right now — but I figured we could go see Derek,” is Scott’s response and his voice is soft. Even four years later, he can’t believe that Derek died; he can’t believe any of them did.
None of them really talk about what happened, not anymore. For the first couple of months, it was the only topic of conversation they had. It resulted in nightmares for most of them and Scott would wake up to Stiles’ screams — or Isaac’s.
Sometimes, though, it was his own that jolted him from his sleep.
The nightmares went away with time and soon they could get through a night without crying or screaming. The pack grew little by little and while they could never completely forget about the ones they lost, they all seemed to move on in their own ways.
“Yeah,” Stiles whispers after a moment, “I’d like that.”
A wave of relief washes over Scott and he pulls away, putting his hand in Stiles’, lacing their fingers together. He leads the other male into the woods and into the clearing where Peter insisted they bury Derek; it was surrounded by trees, though there were none on the actual patch of land, and the sun shone down onto it.
When they get to the grave, Scott looks at the marker. It’s a simple headstone, something they had scraped money together to get, and all it says is Derek’s name. Stiles had wanted to put “forever our Alpha” on it but the pack agreed that they should keep it normal, in case someone stumbled upon it.
Stiles stiffens beside Scott and lifts a hand, chewing on his thumbnail like he always does when they come out here — which is often. They may not talk about the fight or the night they had to watch their friends die, but they do visit their graves as much as they can.
“Hey, grumpy,” Scott whispers and laughs, squeezing Stiles’ hand when he let out a small noise. There are flowers next to the headstone, fresh ones, and Scott guesses that Isaac had been out there before him. “We just wanted to say hi.”
Another noise escapes Stiles’ throat and he chuckles weakly. “Yeah,” he agrees, leading Scott over to the grave marker and down onto the ground, the two of them kneeling in the leaves. Stiles moves his free hand to touch the flowers and he smiles. “Looks like someone came before us.”
“Mmm.” Humming, Scott brushes his thumb along Stiles’ and listens to him tell Derek about his day. This is something they both do — and not just with their former Alpha. Stiles talks to Erica like she’s really there and on more than one occasion, Scott’s noticed him putting on a Batman shirt before they go to the graveyard.
When Stiles gets done with the retelling of his day and how the children really did attack him with glitter, he leans against Scott. “We miss you,” he says, his voice cracking a little, and just hearing that makes the beta’s heart break.
Scott agrees and kisses Stiles’ temple gentle. They sit there for a moment, letting the silence wash over them, and Scott is the first to pull away. He lifts Stiles onto his feet and kisses him gently before leading him over to a large rock.
“I wanted to come out here because…” Scott trails off and laughs, shrugging his shoulders. “I don’t really know why. Maybe because it’s quiet and I feel like Derek should be here for this.”
“For what?” Stiles blinks and sits down on the rock when Scott pushes him down onto it, laughing. “Come on, Scott, what’s going on?”
Taking a deep breath, Scott drops onto one knee in front of Stiles and takes his hands, his own shaking against the other male’s. He clears his throat and gives his boyfriend a soft smile, his heart thumping rapidly against his ribs.
“Scott..” Stiles breathes, his eyes widening.
“I love you,” Scott starts and he licks his lips, “and I’ve loved for for as long as I can remember. There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t thank whatever cosmic being that’s responsible for you being in my life.”
Stiles gasps when Scott takes the box out of his pocket, gulping.
“You’re my best friend and the only person that’s been there for me through… well, through everything. When I turned into a wolf, you never disowned me or anything. You stayed by my side through everything and I’ve always had you,” Scott continues, opening the box before taking the band out, his fingers shaking as he holds it.
“I never thought this would happen — you and me, here, being with each other and… I’m glad that it did. A lot of shitty things had to happen before now, yeah, but we’ve stuck together through it all. So…”
Scott takes a deep breath and exhales slowly before saying, “Stiles Stilinski — will you marry me?”
At first, all Stiles can do is stare at Scott with his mouth open. He looks between the other man and the ring in his hands, tears rimming his eyes. Of course he would cry now, he thinks, and clears his throat, wiping the tears away with his fingertips.
“Yes,” Stiles whispers and then laughs, nodding. “Yeah, fuck, Scott. You know I’ll marry you any day.”
When Stiles answers him, Scott’s brain takes a few seconds to catch up and he laughs, throwing his arms around his boyfriend. He hugs Stiles for a moment and peppers his face with kisses, dragging them down the side of his face and over his mouth before pulling back.
“You gonna give me the ring?”
“Huh?” Scott blinks and laughs again, nodding. He grabs Stiles’ left hand and slides the band onto his ring finger, his own fingers shaking as he slips the ring down all the way. “I love you,” he breathes, his eyes soft as he looks up at Stiles, unable to keep the goofy grin off his face.
Stiles smiles and pushes Scott onto the ground before covering the beta’s body with his own. “I love you too,” he replies and kisses Scott gently, moving a hand through his hair, scratching his scalp lightly.
They kiss for a moment before Scott pulls away, laying his head down on the ground underneath him, listening to the leaves crunch. He can’t stop smiling and he moves a hand to Stiles’, lacing their fingers together before running his pinkie against the silver band.
“Let’s go back to the house and celebrate before the pack comes back,” Stiles suggests in a whisper that makes Scott shiver. He nods his head and lets the other man get up, groaning as he stands, lacing their fingers together one more time.
And later, when Scott replays this scene in his mind, he’ll blame himself for not hearing the footsteps or the cock of the gun.
They’re almost back to the house and Scott is on cloud nine. He’s listening to Stiles talk about planning their wedding and how he wants Isaac to be his best man, so Scott better get someone else, and then everything changes.
A loud bang fills the air and one moment, Scott’s got his hand in Stiles’ and the next his fingers are sliding away. There’s a thump against the ground and he turns to look at where Stiles is laying…
With blood pouring out of a hole on his chest.
“No!” Scott screams and he’s on his knees in a second, his hands flitting to the bullet wound. He presses his fingers against the bloodied front of Stiles’ t-shirt, tears stinging his eyes as he looks down at the man he loves.
“Stiles, no, come on.” The beta’s voice is broken and shaky, tears streaming down his cheeks but he isn’t paying attention to those. His eyes are on Stiles’, on the way they’re fluttering, those long eyelashes that he loves so much twitching.
The world seems to slow down, much like Stiles’ breath, and he lifts a shaky hand to touch Scott’s face, but doesn’t quite get there. Blood bubbles up from between his lips and he chokes on it, making a noise that has Scott’s insides twisting painfully.
Stiles’ fingers twitch at his sides and he manages to wheeze Scott’s name, the entire word going in and out of focus. There’s pain in his chest and he can feel something warm against his skin, something pressing against his sternum, and he wants to complain but can’t.
“Stiles!” Scott is screaming, though his voice is growing distant, and Stiles just wants to tell him that he loves him. Just wants to say those words one last time because this was supposed to be a happy day. It was the day he’d been waiting for for years and now it was tainted.
Before the world goes black, Stiles thinks that this is a peaceful way to die: in the arms of the man he loves, against the warm body he knows better than anything. He can hear his name being spoken, whispered like the wind blowing through the trees, and the last thing he sees before he dies is Scott.
Scott. Beautiful, funny, sweet, amazing Scott who took Stiles’ virginity and promised to never leave him. The boy who he loved more than anything, the very person Stiles would lay his life on the line for…
The veil slips over him and he slides underneath it, unafraid and without pain. Scott’s voice is the last thing he hears and it helps him move on, helps him transition into another world.
*
It was supposed to be their day. The biggest day of both of their lives and it ended in blood, much like most things in Scott’s life do. He never expected this to happen and he always thought that when Stiles died, it would be when he was a hundred and ready to go.
Not when he was twenty-one and just starting to live.
Isaac and Boyd find them in the woods later. Scott’s hunched over top of the broken, bleeding, still body of Stiles. The boy who ran with wolves and put his neck on the line for all of them; the boy with no name.
Everything is a blur after that. Lydia comes to take Scott home and forces him out of his bloody clothes, no matter how many times he protests. Isaac goes after the man who shot Stiles and kills him, though he knows it won’t bring his friend back.
Sheriff Stilinski is called not long after and Scott can’t even look him in the eye when he gets there; he can barely look anyone else in the eye, in fact. He watches with horror as Stiles’ body is put into a body bag and runs over before they zip it up, pressing a kiss to Stiles’ cheek. Scott closes his eyelids with shaking fingertips and takes the ring off his finger.
“I love you,” he whispers and then adds, “and you’ve always had me.”
Then Stiles’ body is carried away and Scott watches as the headlights fade away, his gaze set on the driveway even after they disappear.
Even in death, Stiles had Scott and that thought helps him cope with the loss of his best friend and soul mate.