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"Jim, I want you in Sickbay now! There's no telling what the blue blazes that was and how it's affecting you!"
"Bones, I'm fine." But it was clear Kirk was not fine. There was a flash to his face, and a restlessness to him. His hands seemed to grabbing for something that wasn't there. Or that he didn't know what it was.
"No, Captain. You are indeed 'not fine'. I will escort you to your quarters."
Kirk looked at his science officer. "I do not need to be relieved of duty, Spock."
"That was not my meaning, Captain. I believe I know what has affected you and I surmised that you would rather some privacy for the 'treatment'"
"And how are you presuming to be doing my job? What exactly are you going to do that would not be better served performing in Sickbay?"
"Doctor, you yourself have stated, on numerous occasions I may add, that you are nothing but a simple country doctor. I believe the Captain's trouble have more to do with his mind that with his body. And I do presume to know more about that field than you do. I assure you the Captain will return to you afterward for a complete evaluation."
Bones tried to come up with an answer. In the face of his silence, Spock turned to Kirk. "Captain?'
Kirk was also trying to come up with an answer. Only for him it was for why he required no medical attention of any kind. But his mind was racing. Thoughts only half formed before being replaced with others. With no appeal, Kirk went with Spock to his quarters.
Entering first, Kirk turned and was surprised to see Spock setting the lock for the door. "Spock?"
"Forgive me, Captain. But it would be best if we were not disturbed."
Kirk's trust in Spock ended any further questions. But now all his thoughts were centered on the Vulcan. With no other distractions, memories of past missions came to him. The few personal experiences they had shared. The first time he had met Spock on board the Enterprise.
"Jim." Spock's voice was low, but it caught Kirk's attention. He stared at his officer, his friend. He watched as Spock walked toward him, his hand raised as if to touch his face. 'Mind meld?' was Kirk's only thought before Spock reached him. But it was a cupping of the cheek, not the expected touch. He felt Spock's thumb move slowly along his jaw. Kirk barely had time to register his surprise before Spock leaned forward and kissed him.
'yes' The thought came unbidden. Indeed his thoughts were racing again. Spock? Kissing him? But even that was overshadowed by the fact that Spock was showing such human emotion.
It was a difficulty that his body was not having any problem responding to. His hands came up and gripped Spock by the arms. Whether to keep him there or to in an effort to remain standing, Kirk couldn't say.
Kirk pressed himself closer to Spock and was met with a deepening of the kiss. His arms were now wrapping around the Vulcan, his hands finally finding their purpose. His grip might have been bruising to a normal human, but Spock gave no sign of discomfort.
Instead it was Kirk who was responding. A shiver ran through him as he felt a hand sliding along his stomach. A light trailing of fingers over his chest before retreating brought another.
"Spock. What-"
"Jim?" It was only his name being spoken. A question. But it was enough. All doubt left him. This was what he needed. What he wanted.
"Yes."
Kirk's mouth was captured again as he felt himself being maneuvered toward his bedroom. The quiet snick of the door and the dimmer light he barely registered. Hands were sliding up his body again bringing his shirt up with them. His own hands sought to do the same, almost expecting to be pushed away. But Spock seemed to move to allow the action. Kirk felt the smooth skin under it's light covering of hair. His mind supplied the mental picture to go with his touch and he pressed closer again.
Both men broke the kiss, hands pulling at each other's uniforms. Kirk's fingers seemed to fumble, making his task take longer than Spock's.
Kirk looked at Spock, completely uncovered before him for the first time. The build that was hinted at by his chest and arms were carried though to his legs and thighs.
At first Kirk kept his eyes from lingering in one specific area. But again, his body took the lead and soon one hand was sliding along Spock's hip to trace down his length while the other roamed here and there.
Spock's touches seemed to mirror Kirk's, a step behind. As if he were letting Kirk decide when and where to be touched.
"Jim, do you have-" There was no delicate way to put it, but Kirk knew to what he was referring to. He nodded, pointing to a small drawer. Spock retrieved the small bottle, returning with a hard kiss as well. One that Kirk broke as he felt the hand on him. "No, you. Please."
There was a second of silence, then a nod. "Yes. Lay down."
Kirk pushed the pillow to the floor and spread out full onto his back, his legs naturally falling open. Spock moved to sit at the end of the bed, a small amount of the bottle's contents being warmed between his hands.
Kirk's breath caught in his throat as he felt fingers circling in warning before a steady pressure began. His mind was once again disobeyed and Kirk felt himself pushing down onto the fingers penetrating him. With an effort he managed deep breaths as he tried to relax and let the pain work through him.
It was only when he had pushed completely inside Kirk that Spock move to kneel between his legs. He had prepared himself before reaching for his captain so as he withdrew his fingers he was able to quickly fill the void left.
What now breached Kirk was thicker, unyielding. The pressure and pain was sharper and he cried out; even as his legs were brought back and his hips lifting to meet them. Another cry was dragged from him as a hand curled around him and began slow, steady strokes. Strokes soon joined by trusts hard and deep inside him.
It was through a haze that Kirk saw Spock. Saw his hands reach for the Vulcan and pull him down into a hard kiss, only broken when the need for air demanded it. He stared up at Spock, watching his vision grew dimmer and dimmer as the pressure inside him grew more and more.
"Sp-spock."
"Jim."
Again, just his name. But it carried with it all he needed. His legs came up and tightned around Spock as he slammed against him. Once, twice, three times. With a shout Kirk came, his body kept still only by the strenght of the man on top of him. His hands reached up, only to fall to his sides as he fell into darkness.
Kirk felt the sheet on him and the pillow under his head before he tried to open his eyes. The lights were dim enough not to hurt when he finally did. And he was alone. It was only the aching of his body that let him know everything had really happened.
The shower was longer and hotter than was his norm and he had resisted seeing what the time was as he dressed. He hoped his walk to sickbay would loosen him up more before he returned to the bridge.
As he entered the public part of his quarters, his gaze fell on a piece of, what is it paper? where had that come from? A message from Spock. Actually handwritten. As Kirk read it, he saw the reasoning behind it.
Captain.
Forgive me for my actions. But it was the only course of action I could see.
You were affected with the spores of a certain plant, one that is apparently indigenousness to this world. I had heard of it but had never seen a picture of it, so I was unable to realize its danger til it was too late. I have already sent a warning to Starfleet and any visiting ships will be warned.
Captain, you will remember my mental state during the time of the pon farr. The plant achieves a similar, though lesser, state in humans who come in contact with it. Your body required a release and the possibility of emotional complications if another of the crew had been involved led me to the conclusion that I was the best candidate.
Rest assured, I will not speak of this to anyone. Nor have I made any report regarding this. Dr. McCoy will know only what you tell him. That is also why I have chosen this form of communication. Proceed as you will.
Kirk had the lie ready for Bones as he entered Sickbay. And of course, Spock gave nothing away on the Bridge.
Only the memories remained of what was. And could never be again.