Archive of Our Own

“Hanji, for-fuck-sakes I'm not joking.” The crazy brunette barked a laugh for the umpteenth time this afternoon, hunching over in her chair as she wrapped her arms around her slender waist, clearly finding the predicament I'm in quite amusing.

“Wa- wait a minute here cherub, lemme get this straight.” I scowled at the woman then, just as the annoying nickname left her lips, practically sending daggers her way as she tried to catch her breath to continue with what she was saying. Ugh, I knew I should’ve done this in her lab, the crazy will never leave my room now.

“You’re telling me, precious, sweet little Eren has been...” The woman paused, hand twirling in the air as her brain searched for the appropriate words. “Harassing you, for the past couple of weeks?”

“Yes, that’s exactly what I'm saying. It’s what I've been saying since you got here shitty glasses, now will you actually fucking listen to me for once in your goddamn life!” Hanji leant back in the armchair she was seated in then, eyes widening as a huff passed her lips and as she crossed her arms childishly.

“Don’t be so rude, I am listening! You’re gunna have to be nice to me if you want my help, bub.”

“Fuck that, it’s not worth it, you can leave. I’ll ask bushy-brows for his advice. Hell, I probably should’ve gone to him in the first place, I don’t know why I went to you of all people.” The brunette gasped, her expression hurt before she pouted and glared at me for a moment, her rich brown eyes locked into mine until she gave in.

“FINE-FINE-FINE!” The nutso yelled, flinging her arms up into the air in defeat as the shrill sound made its way into my eardrums, making me want to throw something at the woman’s head for making my ears throb. “I’ll help you; I won’t let anyone steal this opportunity from me! Y’know, I think this is the first time you’ve asked for my help! Well, with anything that’s personal anyway.” Hanji giggled, leaning forward to take a hold of the teacup that was safely sat atop my desk, taking a few small sips of the delicious beverage that raspberry and peach tea was before she made herself more comfortable, snuggling down into the plush cushions she was leaning back on as she brought her legs up into her chest, teacup in hand as she finally felt cosy enough to fix me with her gaze.

“Alrighty, start from the beginning. How did all this happen?”

“Well, it all started a few weeks ago...”

Three weeks prior ~

“OOOOOH LEEVIII!” Hanji rapped on my door, once, twice, before she let herself in and strolled over to me like the woman owns the place. Plonking herself down in one of the two chairs there momentarily as she crossed her arms. At least kind enough, or rather, at least not dumb enough to interrupt my writing as she waited, fairly patiently, for me to finish up my paperwork. Only then when I placed my quill back in its rightful place, did I look up and meet Hanji’s too energetic eyes.

“Evenin’ buttercup!” I groaned in distaste at the nickname, the woman’s voice all to bubbly for this time of night. Hell, the hours only around nine something, but I've been doing paperwork for the past four. I’m tired, I have an oncoming headache and now that shit-for-brain’s here, it’s more than likely going to turn into a migraine.

“What the fuck is it, Hanji?” I rubbed at my eyes, hand soon going to run through my hair as the woman jumped up from her seat and spun on her heels, beckoning me with an open palm as she spoke. “Erwin wants to see us both, something about the last mission, everyone’s going to be there now, let’s go! We’re already late!” I stood from my chair as I made a clicking sound with my tongue, pushing the thing under my desk before I followed Hanji to the one of many meeting rooms in the castle, our footsteps echoing down the somewhat empty halls as we walked.

“How come I'm being told so late, why didn’t I know of this already?”

“Oh, that may be my fault, I kinda forgot to tell you.” The nutty woman laughed as she tightened her hair, pulling at the strands roughly as she did so. “What!? Can you really blame me; I was examining some interesting new fluids we found from-”

“Stop right there-” I cut in as I lifted a hand, palm flat to catch Hanji’s attention. “I don’t care, nor do I want to know. Just don’t forget something like this again, idiot. Or I will, have to smack you upside the head.” Hanji shrieked, clasping her hands together as she gave me that insane look she gets whenever someone mentions titans, soon grabbing my own hands as she brought them up to her face, forcing us to a halt.

“It’d be an honour, Levi!”

“Ugh, get off me fucknut.” I tore my hands away from her sweaty ones then, quickly wiping my palms down my thighs in disgust, ridding them of whatever germs that’d no doubt just been transferred. “Which room are we going to, anyway?”

“This one!” Hanji gestured to the approaching door, stepping to the side of it once we got close enough, bowing down and sweeping her arm through the air as she did so.

“After you, mi lady.”

“Fuck you, Hanji.”

“You wish!”

“Yeah, I really don’t.” I entered the room, closing the mahogany door roughly behind me, a painful thud following suit, just as a soft cry left Hanji’s lips as the thing impacted with her forehead. A small sadistic smile worked its way onto my lips then, followed by a faint chuckle as I walked further into the room. Erwin’s eyes lifted then, looking up from the plethora of paperwork, maps spread out on the table in front of him as the others in the room continued examining them, some even taking notes. Battle plans and whatnot for the next mission, no doubt.

“Ah, good to see you two have finally decided to show up.” The blond chuckled, gesturing to the few empty seats left around the smallish round table with his massive hand as Hanji entered and closed the door behind her, shooting me a glare as she rubbed her forehead and growled, the sound unthreatening as I just bared my own teeth back at her.

Walking around the table, I gently rested my hand on Petra’s shoulder in greeting, gaining a warm smile from the woman before I removed my hand and nodded toward Erd, Gunter and Auruo before I went and sat to Erwin’s right as Hanji went and sat next to Petra, leaving the seat next to me the only one left to be filled.

“Now, all we’re waiting on is one last person.”

“Who?” I questioned, eyebrow raised as a confused expression crossed my features. Anyone of importance is already here. And as if on some sort of cue, the door swung open on its hinges with a loud creak and almost slammed shut as the body that just entered flailed around to stop it from doing just that.

“Sorry I’m late, I was just finishing up my chores in the kitchen.” No, it can’t be, why is-

“It’s alright Eren,” The behemoth man smiled, waving him into the room. “come take a seat.” Eren returned the smile to the man as he nodded, the slight blush on his cheeks growing as he came and sat in the unoccupied chair beside me, tucking himself in and flitting his eyes to me before he sent me one of those soft smiles of his, tucking a few chestnut strands of his hair behind his ear before he turned and faced Erwin. What the fuck was that all about?

“Now that we’re all here, let’s begin.” Erwin placed his hands atop the surface in front of him and interlocked his fingers, addressing all of us with his cool blue eyes before he began to speak. The man spoke about the last mission and how it was a success, but a success we only gained by the skin of our teeth. All was going according to plan until a few people got injured; Erd’s still recovering from the deep gash he received on the side of his thigh from being thrown off of his horse and landing on a particularly pointed rock when a titan seemingly appeared out of nowhere, evidently startling the horse. Thankfully though, we all managed to survive and the injuries themselves weren’t all too bad. Hanji fixed the man up with a few stitches and a thick wad of gauze, secured by a tightly bound bandage around the wound to be sure it doesn’t get infected. And as for the others, it wasn’t anything life-threatening, scratches and other minor injuries, nothing that couldn’t be fixed with a little bit of antiseptic and rest.

As the time ticked onward, the man finished up his analysis of the last mission and began to go onto the new mission scheduled for three days from now. Another basic supply run as we’re running out of the essentials, the blonde explained. Apparently, according to the new intel we’ve received, there are fresh medical and practical supplies in this small village outside the walls a good few miles away. However, it was that very fact which made it more dangerous than it should be to get meds and other things, such as blankets, clothes or maybe even food. If, the stall owners would be willing to trade, that is. So that’s why Eren’s accompanying us. Hell, having a titian shifter around sure does help make things easier for you, aye eyebrows?

I shook my head slightly then as the man went on and on about the details of all the usual things, spewing his motivational and so called encouraging shit-talk he does. ‘Stay vigilant.’ ‘Look out for each other.’ ‘Stay close together. Remember, you’re a team, act like one.’ Seriously, it gets so fucking annoying hearing that spiel after time and time again. But here these idiots are, eating that shit right out if his hand, looking at him with sparkling eyes. Eren being one person in particular.

The bright eyed brunette’s been on multiple missions with me over the eight years of him being a part of the Scout Regiment. His determination and capability to protect himself and others only growing in that time. He still has a lot to learn, yes, but even I can’t deny that he’s a strong soldier. Looking at the tanned man, you wouldn’t so easily see it. He appears to have no scars on his body that show experience being out beyond the walls, all because of his healing ability. It makes him look a lot younger than he is, his smooth and unblemished skin giving him a forever young appearance. However, that only shaves off a couple years to his actual age. I never really noticed too much before but now that I think about it, I guess his face isn’t so bad to look at either. Hell, all the fucking girls, and some guys, fawn and gush over him whenever they see him or even hear his bloody name. He’s made quite a reputation for himself over the years, but I guess that isn’t surprising.

The boy’s practically godlike in some people’s eyes and I somewhat get that coming from the citizens of the walls, they need it. They need to put their hope in something, or rather, someone. And to be honest? I’m kinda glad that burdens no longer just resting on my shoulders alone. But of course I’d never admit that to anyone. It’ll probably stroke the brats ego if he ever found out. Speaking of the brat, I looked to the side of me, letting my eyes trail down the tanned man’s face as I got carried away by my thoughts, looking for any impurities, imperfections, anything. But... I couldn’t find any. All I noticed was that he has a light dusting of freckles spreading out across his cheeks and nose, as well as he has a small mole on the outside of his ear. It was then when I glanced back over his cheeks, that I saw them flush to a deep red as the brunette shifted almost uncomfortably in his chair, flitting his eyes around the room until he side-eyed me, the vibrant and bright things leaving my own eyes almost as soon as they connected. Seriously, what the fucks wrong with this kid today?

I don’t really know why I kept my eyes on him then, just watching as his caramel skin morphed into a shade of crimson in his crappy attempt to not blush further and stop his fidgeting, more than likely uncomfortable under my stare. But I guess the answer to that was simple... it’s entertaining.

Present day.

“Okay, so he blushed when you were looking at him. Anyone would do that,” Hanji shrugged. “you’re not ugly Levi, as a matter of fact you’re quite the extreme opposite! You’re as hot as titan steam!” I just rolled my eyes at the woman as I shook my head.

“You wanted to know how this all started, so I'm starting with the very beginning, now shut up and keep listening.” Hanji nodded obediently, taking another sip out of her tea before she pushed her glasses back up the bridge of her nose and blinked owlishly at me, waiting for me to continue.

Two weeks ago ~

Huffing to myself, I made my way down to Erwins office like I usually did this time of the week to hand the man my paperwork and have him check a few things here and there. Approaching the blondes door, I knocked a few times and entered once I heard his call from the other side for me to come in.

“Ah, Levi, good afternoon.” Erwin smiled in greeting as he looked up from his own work and ran his fingers through his hair, the small breeze floating in from the wide open windows making the man’s loosely done button up shirt flap about calmly.

“It sure is a doozy of a day today, huh? So bloody hot.” Erwin chuckled, his icy blue eyes clocking my file of paperwork in my hand as I took a seat in one of the two chairs in front of his desk, soon having the man reach out across the deep mahogany thing as a sign for me to pass it over to him.

“That it is.” I handed the man the file, leaning back in the somewhat comfortable seat once I did, crossing my arms as I did the same with my legs. The blonde pulled back the first page of the file shortly after his fingers took the thing from my grasp, reading over my words before he flit his gaze back up to me, his eyes quickly studying my face before he spoke.

“Is everything alright, Levi? You seem more... saturnine, than usual today.” I sighed then as Erwin eyed me, running my fingers through my hair. I guess there’s no harm in asking.

“I’m fine eyebrows, I was just wondering... could I ask you something?”

“Of course you can,” The bulky man set aside his work then post-haste, giving me his complete attention. “you can always confide in me.” I huffed a laugh at the unneeded concern in the man’s eyes then as he told me something I already knew, uncrossing and crossing my legs, making myself a bit more comfortable. I’m probably gunna be here for a while, might as well get comfy.

“Has... has Eren been acting strangely around you?” Erwin frowned then, slightly taken aback by my words as the bushy things shot up, clearly not expecting that to be my question.

“Strange how?”                                                      

“I don’t know how to describe it, it’s just... he’s been acting weirdly around me. He’s been avoiding me like the fucking plague Hanji speaks about in those shitty old books of hers. Whenever we’re in the same room he does his damnedest not to look at me or even in my general direction for that matter and if we pass each other in the hallway, he just gets all red-faced and scurries by. I thought maybe I’ve upset him or some bullshit like that. Do you know anything? Because if so, please tell me, I’m getting sick of feeling like I’ve done something wrong.” Erwin folded his giant arms then, brows knitting together as he considered my words carefully.

“Sounds to me like you’re worried about him?” The man grinned impishly as his voice oozed with mischief, his eyes glistening as he regarded me with a mischievous expression. 

“Don’t take this out of context Erwin.” I shot the man a hard look, just as a light laugh escaped him. I mean, was it so wrong of me if I was a little worried? He’s a member of my squad after all and I’ll treat him as such. I need to trust them to have my back and to do their job correctly, to know if they’re not only physically healthy and ready for anything as soon as it hits but mentally too. And what I’ve gathered, Eren isn’t acting like himself and that puts everyone at risk if it goes bad.

“Oooh, we’re using first names now; you must be very concerned about the boy to do that.”

“Fuck off Erwin, I just want to know if you know anything.” The blond sighed, shaking his head as he mumbled ‘killjoy.’

“Well, to me, Eren seems perfectly fine. He completes his chores around the castle just fine, he works hard in training and pushes himself and from what I’ve gathered from reports on missions, he conducts himself impeccably.” I huffed then, slumping back in my chair as the heavenly cool breeze met me, cooling my body down to some degree before it faded away.

“You look disappointed.” Erwin stated. Well of fucking course I am, I didn’t really get a bloody answer as to why he’s being the way he is with me.

“No shit.” I sighed, running a hand through my hair as my voice went softer than intended. “I just don’t get it Erwin... could I have done something wrong?” I fixed the man with my gaze then, receiving a gentle smile from him once he tilted his head to the side slightly.

“No,” He shook his head, a light laugh leaving him as he considered me. “I don’t think you’ve done anything wrong per say, but rather what you’re doing.” I frowned, a bewildered expression crossing my features.

“Eh? And what’s that exactly?” Erwin just about burst out laughing then, almost as if the answer to my question was as obvious as the sky is blue.

“It’s just you.” What? That doesn’t even make any fucking sense?

“Me?” The man nodded.

“I think our Eren has a little crush.” He beamed, looking like he’s enjoying this all too much.

“What? No, don’t be ridiculous Erwin, that's absurd.”

“Why is it? You’re a handsome man Levi; I think it’d be more absurd if anyone here didn’t have a crush on you. Besides, from what I’ve seen and heard, it wouldn’t be such a stretch to say he does like you like that. It makes sense.” A perplexed expression worked its way onto my face then, the blonde’s words replaying in my mind. No, it can’t be true. Surly I would’ve noticed by now if it was. But the man was right... it did make sense. It explains everything. The blushing, the cute soft smiles he sends me when- wow wait a second... cute? Since when did I start thinking that- ugh, y’know what? No. It’s already getting to my head.

I refocused my eyes on Erwin then, choosing to shut out those puzzling thoughts that whirled around my mind as I shook my head in disbelief. “No, it can’t be true.” The man tutted, shaking his head as he regarded me with a displeased expression.

“Levi. It’s just a possibility. Anyway, would it be so bad if he did? Over the years, the two of you have seemed to become quite close with one another.” The man raised his eyebrows, a sly grin forming on his lips at his very obvious suggestion.

“What the fuck are you trying to imply, eyebrows? The brat and I work well together when we’re on missions, so what?”

“I'm not just talking about that,” The blonde shook his head. “I'm talking about the times when the two of you have got back from a mission and went for a drink to celebrate the success.”

“It wasn’t like it was just Eren and I; Petra and the others were there too.”

“That may be true but who was sat with you the entire time?” Eren was, but I don’t see how that’s important shitty-brows.

“By that sour look, I'm sure the answer’s Eren.” I curled my lip up then, just about having enough of his nonsense as a growl left my throat, the sound doing nothing to the man as he just chuckled, unperturbed.

“And if I’m not wrong, you’ve even shared a meal together, haven’t you?”

“What the fuck?! I’d hardly call Eren coming to sit and eat next to me late one night in the mess hall sharing a meal and-” Erwin cut in.

“But you talked, yes?” Arghh! I’m about this fucking close to jumping over this fucking shitty desk and beating the fucking crap outta you Erwin!

“That wasn’t my choice, the brat could hardly keep his fucking mouth shut, I wasn’t just gunna ignore him, I am bloody human Erwin.” I huffed, re-crossing my arms. What are you trying to get at anyway, shit-for-brows?

“Anyway, my point to all this is that he’d probably feel closer to you after that, there’s no doubt in my mind that he does like you. Just admit it, you like him back too, even just a little bit.” A shit-eating grin worked its way onto Erwins lips then, the thing making me want to throw myself over this desk to a least punch it clean off his face.

The truth is; I don’t know what the fuck it is I feel. I'm self-aware enough to know I like the intimate company of both males and females but that’s only when I need to relieve tension, stress or to quench my lust. But I’ve only ever done that a few times before, I could count it on one hand and still have a few fingers left, the rest of the time I chose to take care of those needs by myself. I don’t... I don’t even know if I'm capable of loving someone... if I'm strong enough to handle them dying because fuck, in the world we live in, that's a very high possibility. And when it comes to Eren? I will admit, I do find him attractive but... Arghh! Fuck it, I can’t take this mind-fucking any longer.

“You know what, fuck you, I don’t have to take this shit, I’m leaving. I hope you have a shitty day, asshole.” Erwin chuckled, no doubt shaking his head as I stomped to his door, just barely hearing his goodbyes as I slammed the huge thing shut and stormed off down the hallway with no destination in mind as I tried to order all these jumbled up thoughts.

And it was then, when I’d finally managed to calm myself somewhat and regain some composure that I meandered down the halls aimlessly, passing many people as I went, coming up to a supply closet to grab a bottle or two of bleach, fully intending to clean my entire living space to distress even further. But as I came up to the old, chipped door, I was stopped in my tracks. What the... are there people in there? If I find them fucking in there by my bleach, I'm gunna poor the lot over the shits.

“What are you saying, Eren?” Came Armin’s quiet, muffled voice, the sound only just audible to my ears. What the fuck? Why’s the brat in a storage room with Armin?

“Speak clearly Eren, it’s hard to understand you when you ramble.” Mikasa’s voice was next to meet my ears, her voice gentle and a lot clearer to understand. What the fuck? Why are the three of them in there? What are they doing? I snuck forward, steps silent and swift as I stood by the door, ear hovering just over the wood as I focused on the voices coming from the small room.

“It’s just...” Eren paused, his voice sounding almost... fragile, as his words quavered. “I'm sick of holding this feeling in, of hiding it. I want what I want, I can’t help that.” What... what’s he talking about?

“Are you sure?” Armin asked, his words cautious. “That you feel that way, I mean.”

“Yes Armin, I'm certain. It’s been at least two years now and the feeling has only grown but I'm getting tired of it.” Shuffling then met my ears, no doubt the two of them coming to Eren’s side to reassure him in some way.

“I’ve got nothing left to lose,” Eren huffed a humourless laugh. “there’s no real point in hiding it now, I just can’t any longer. No more shyness, no more being scared, no more being nervous or afraid of what’s gunna happen, I’m... I’m gunna go for it.” What... what the fuck am I listening to here?

“Eren, have you lost your goddamn mind?!” Armin shrieked, soon to be hushed by both Eren and Mikasa.

“Sorry, sorry it’s just... have you forgotten about who exactly we’re talking about here? About what that person could do to you?”

“Don’t be ridiculous Armin; I don’t think they’d go as far as to killing me or anything if that's what you’re so worried about.” What? Kill him? Okay, seriously now, what the actual fuck are these three talking about?

“He’s got a point though, Eren. At least tread with some sort of caution, don’t just throw it to the wind.”

“Of course I will, I may be dumb but I'm not stupid. Anyway I-“

“Wait, I think someone’s there, look at the bottom of the door, there’s a shadow.” Shit. Backing away on the balls of my feet, I made sure to stay quiet until I was out of sight and earshot, only then when I was sure I was in the clear did I walk back to my own room, brain mulling over the new information I just overheard.

Present day ~

“WAAAIT!” Hanji yelled, waving her arms about as she interrupted me once again. “So basically what I just gathered from all that is, 1: I totally agree with Erwin, 2: You’re sorta in denial about your feelings and 3: Eren basically just confirmed his feelings for you in that storage room! You might get some ass soon, woohoo! Unless you’re the bottom of course, then maybe Eren could-”

“Shut up shitty-glasses,” I rolled my eyes as I came to a stand, grabbing both mine and Hanji’s empty teacups before I made my way over to my teapot sitting over the pre-heated stove, pouring the delicious beverage into the two cups before I settled the teapot in its rightful place and headed back to Hanji, handing her the hot cup by the rim before I returned to my seat, taking in a beautiful mouthful of delicious tea and spoke. “Eren didn’t confirm shit. That’s just what I overheard.”

“He basically admitted it!” Hanji brought the teacup up to her face, the wisps of steam dancing up to her glasses and fogging them as she took a sip.

“No he didn’t, he didn’t even say a name.”

“It’s obviously about you though, Leviii!” The crazy woman cried, the strength of which almost causing her to spill the flavourful tea I so graciously agreed to share. “Oh, before I forget to ask! Do you want him to like you like that? Would you accept his feelings and maybe even return them?!” The woman leant forward then, eyes ablaze with excitement as she fixed the brown things on me, tea in hand sloshing around in its confines as she waited for her answer. An answer that I do not yet know.

“Honestly..? I don’t know. I’d accept them, but return them fully? I'm not... I'm not too sure of that yet.” But what I do know is that there is something there, something that’s waiting... but whatever that something is, I just can’t describe or define it just yet.

The sparkle in Hanji’s eyes visibly died then as the brunette slumped back in her chair, looking deflated. “Oh... well, there’s more to this story, isn’t there? You said he got real handsy with you, mama wants to hear absolutely all about it! Every. Single. Detail! You hear me?! Don’t miss a thing!” Hanji practically sprung back to her usual self then, her rich brown eyes once again glistening as I rolled my own.

“Oooh, this is so exciting, I can’t wait, eeeck! I wonder if Eren’s sexual urges are the same as any humans or if they’re stronger or something because of his shifting ability! AH! I so wanna find out! Maybe he’ll tell me more if I ask him myself, then I could run some tests...” The nutso trailed off then, speaking more to herself as she mumbled incoherent words before she gasped loudly, snapping her head up to meet my eyes. “OH MY GOD LEVI WOULD YOU LET ME WATCH YOU AND EREN HAVE-“

“Hanji.” I warned, cutting the woman off, my low and level voice catching Hanji by surprise as her big brown eyes blinked stupidly at mine. “Don’t ever ask something like that again or I’ll tie you up, throw you to a bunch of abnormals and watch happily as you scream in pain while they tear you apart, limb from limb.”

“Oh Levi,” The woman blushed, lifting both hands up to cup her warm cheeks while she spoke. “so kinky, you’re making me all hot! Eren sure is gunna be in for a ride with you. Or rather, he’ll be the one doing the riding, HA!”

“Just shut up while I tell you the rest, will you?”

“Nooo, I change my mind! I just can’t wait anymore Levi, I'm starting to get impatient! Will you just fucking tell me already?! I wanna know!” Hanji’s reddened cheeks made the woman look like a child throwing a temper tantrum as she pouted and puffed out her cheeks, her adamant gaze looking more than just determined to get the information she wanted.

“Oh for-fuck-sakes Hanji, fine!” Ugh, fucking shitty-glasses, always ruining things. I sighed, taking a sip of tea to calm myself and to order my thoughts, the delicious flavour washing over my tastebuds before I swallowed the mouthful I had and readied myself to speak.

“Eren only really started to get handsy with me about ten or so days ago. It was almost as if a switch had been flipped inside his brain. It was strange and not to mention slightly worrying that his behaviour could change so quickly. He no longer seemed to worry when he got bashful around me, he’d just keep looking at me, his eyes locked with mine...” I’ll never forget that image of Eren... it being forever etched into my memory, never to be forgotten. That first moment his stunning, soul-stirring eyes landed on mine with so much... so much feeling inside them, so much emotion, it just about took all strength in my legs, had my knees quaking and failing to do their job and keep me up on my feet.

The very sight awakened that something within me, made a certain emotion bloom and stir up in my chest. It made my heart almost stop, made it pound and tremble all at once. This... this is all very new for me, confusing, far too perplexing for me to even try and comprehend. All the thoughts swimming around my head where beginning to overpower other mundane ones, drowning me in a vast array of questions I simply couldn’t answer.

What’s this feeling Eren always manages to provoke in me?

Why does it affect me so much?

Why does the thought of Eren simply looking at me make my heart race?

I’ve been non-stop thinking about the boy for a while now. It’s concerning, he’s become all I think about lately when... when it shouldn’t be. I shouldn’t be thinking the things I am, I shouldn’t... I shouldn’t secretly want those things to be real. I shouldn’t be feeling the things I am; I shouldn’t have those feelings for... for Eren. He no doubt has feelings for someone else. That I know, and given the conversation I overheard him and his friends have, I'm more than certain of it. I just... I can’t believe what’s happened to me.

I’ve somehow gained... feelings for Eren.

“C’mon Levi, you gotta gimme more than that! Mama needs details! What, did he grab your crotch and make you moan by surprise and now you’re confused because you liked it so much?!” The crazy grinned wildly, this deranged look flashing across her features as she leant forward to place her empty cup on my desk.

“No, nothing of the sort shitty-glasses.” Hanji whined then, proceeding to throw another tantrum like fit, wiggling, squirming and twisting about in her chair before she sagged and slumped down in her seat.

“Arghh, you’re killing me here! I want the yummy parts!” I rolled my eyes, bringing my teacup up to my lips to take a sip of the delectable beverage, drawing out the silence that was slowly killing Hanji, prolonging the thing as the woman sent me a particularly pointed look, her glare unthreatening as she crossed her arms and waited.

“Now, those looks from Eren I could handle but after that it only got more... intense. Eren was sat next to me in a meeting we had together, his gaze meeting mine every so often but... but the meaning behind his eyes had changed, he looked at me with a mix of... longing and... lust-” Hanji pretty much bellowed a shriek then, successfully cutting me off as she continued to laugh in that annoyingly joyous way of hers.

“I knew it! My baby does want you! He wants you so so bad, I just know it, I-”

“Shut it goggles, I'm not done.” Hanji snapped her mouth shut then, quicker than you can call the crazy woman insane as she nodded and made a locking gesture to her mouth, hand throwing away the imaginary key over her shoulder.

“During this bog-standard and quite frankly monotonous meeting, I began to zone out and plan the rest of my day like I’d usually do if eyebrows yammered on for too long, but before I could get far in doing that, I noticed something... warmth specifically, starting to seep into and travel up my thigh. I instantly snapped out of my thoughts then, eyes looking down to find the brats hand resting there, slowly beginning to glide up from my knee, his palm and fingers warming my thigh as it smoothed its way up, and in that moment I was only just able to pull my eyes away to meet with his and fuck...” I paused, taking in Hanji’s eager and excited expression as she sat on the edge of her seat, her eyes as wide as anything as they sparkled in anticipation.

“His cheeks were flushed, bottom lip caught between his teeth as his libidinous gaze trailed from my eyes, all the way to my lips and back up again as he let his lip slide out from his teeth slowly in an all too... sexy, manner.” The crazy jumped out of her seat in a flail of arms and legs then, a huge gasp leaving her lips before she started to scream, a massive smile on her face as she paced around the room with her palm resting over her temples as she came up to my desk and slapped her hands down on it, her expression forming one of true excitement as she locked gazes with me.

“OH MY FUCKING SHIT LEVI! WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME THIS EARLIER!? THAT’S SO HOT I THINK I MIGHT’VE JUST ORGASMED, OH MY GOD!”

“I didn’t need to know that, Hanji.” The woman barked a laugh, shaking her head as she straightened herself up, hands coming to rest on her hips before she went and plonked herself back down in her seat.

“Well, at least we can say for definite now that he wants you.” Hanji beamed, looking overjoyed by the fact as she leant back in her chair, giggling quietly as she brought both of her long legs up so she could sit criss-crossed.

“So, is that all he’s done?” The brunette questioned, quickly pushing up her glasses as I shook my head in answer, lifting my teacup up to my lips to take a large mouthful of my tea.

“Go ahead, do tell. I'm all ears.” Hanji clasped her hands together then, placing them in her lap as she fixed me with her gaze.

“There’ve been multiple occasions of... physical contact. It’s been happening almost every single day now. His hands always seem to find their way to my thighs, or my shoulders when I'm seated and sometimes they even brush across my neck. Though, that’s something I can easily handle as it has a simple solution, just a quick smack to the backs of his hands normally does the trick. But... but the other things he does when his hands are on me... now that on the other hand, doesn’t have such an easy solution.” The woman nodded her head, the action looking like it was supposed to encourage me on somehow. The crazy looked like she was about to fucking burst; her jaw wired tight as she clenched her teeth, I'm actually surprised she managed to hold whatever it is she wants to say back.

“He says very... suggestive things.” Hanji’s eyes pretty much popped out of her skull then as she gave up holding back, a huge grin forming on her lips as she squealed.

“Spill!”

“Nuh-uh, no way in hell Hanji.” An offended expression settled on the brunette’s face then as she gasped, however that look didn’t stay for long as her features soon changed as her resolve strengthened, clearly reluctant to let this go so easily. The woman’s as stubborn as a mule, after all.

“What, why!? You’ve told me everything else! How am I supposed to help you if I don’t know everything, huh?” Because it’s embarrassing, shit-brain! I’m a fucking grown-ass-man and I'm sat here trying to figure out if this brat does have an interest in me like an idiot! I sighed, bringing my fingers to the bridge of my nose to rub the area. Why did I have to grow these feelings? It was so much easier when I didn’t have any toward the man.

“PLEASE LEVI! PLEASE-PLEASE-PLEASE-PLEASE PLEEEEAAAASE!”

“Oi! Stop yelling!”

“NO! I’LL ONLY STOP WHEN YOU TELL ME AT LEAST ONE THING HE SAID! PLEASE TELL MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!”

“No. Now shut your trap!” Hanji snapped her mouth shut then, sending me a scowl, crossing her arms in a huff as I sent back a glare hopefully strong enough to wound the crazy woman.

“Arghh, fine! Ya big meanie.” Hanji pouted for a moment then before she uncrossed her arms and sat up, leaning forward to rest her elbows on her thighs as she spoke.

“So, you want my advice then?” That is why you’re here in the first place, shitty-glasses.

“Just call him here and ask him. Talk to each other. He clearly likes you and you clearly like him, even if you say it’s a little bit or that you’re confused. Call him here to figure that shit out and finally get yourself some answers. Although,” Hanji paused, her big brown eyes inspecting mine. “I can see in those eyes of yours that it’s more than just a little bit. I wouldn’t worry cherub, everything will turnout just fine. I feel it in my ovaries.” I rolled my eyes then, a faint laugh leaving my lips as the woman chuckled alongside me.

“I think I just might have to do that.” Hanji grinned, nodding her head as a proud look crossed her face, more than likely feeling happy that she got to help me in some way. The crazy woman might very well be just that, but in all honesty, I don’t think I’d have her any other way. She just wouldn’t be the Hanji I know and... well... love. She’s a great friend, well, when she behaves anyway.

“Thank you, Hanji...” The brunette’s eyes widened then, a tender smile soon forming on her lips at my soft-spoken words.

“You’re more than welcome my lovely, I’m just glad I could help somehow. Even if I did just state the obvious and listen but sometimes that all you need, y’know?” I nodded, eyes following Hanji as she rose from her seat.

“Well, thank you for the tea, it was delicious as always!” Hanji grinned, making her way towards the door as she continued. “Anyway, I shall go find your soon to be lover and tell him you want to see his succulent ass!”

“Don’t you dare use those words exactly Hanji or so help me I will-” Hanji barked a laugh then, cutting me off as she grabbed her shoes by the door and waved a hand over her shoulder as she shut the thing behind her and went off to find Eren.

“Arghh.” Fuck you Hanji; I take back everything I just thought. A heavy sigh left my lungs then as an almost eerie, deafening silence filled the room, the only sound meeting my ears being the slight creaking of my chairs legs as I reclined fully in my chair, staring up at the blank ceiling of my room as my mind began to race once again, eyes following the small cracks and dents as I thought.

What should I say when he gets here?

Should I be blunt and get straight to the point?

How is he going to react?

Is it going to go badly? Or will it go surprisingly well?

Maybe he won’t freak out or get angry or some bullshit like that; maybe this’ll all be fine, just like Hanji said. I mean, what’s the worst that could happen? I just want to find out if he has some sort of feelings for me. And if he doesn’t, which I'm sure is the case considering the conversation I overheard between him and his friends. He has feelings for someone else and that’s just fine but... but Hanji and Erwin have managed to sell the idea that it’s me who he’s crushing on and I... I need to find out if that's true or not.

But... but what if it is true? What if he does... have feelings for me? What will I do? What’ll happen then? Will we start to... to date? Would Eren even want that? Does he even want to start a relationship? Does he just want sex, no strings? Because if that's so, I don’t think I’ll be able to do that for long. Despite what everyone here thinks, I am human... I’ll get too attached to the brat, I’ll start to want him even more than I... than I already do. I’ll crave his touch, the warmth of his skin at night, the sound of his breathing, the feel of his heartbeat mixing with the beat of my own.

Fuck... what have I gotten myself into with this brat? I feel so nervous; my hearts pounding so hard it’s making my chest ache. I need to calm myself down, it’ll be alright... at the worst, he’ll tell me he either has feelings for someone other than myself or he’ll say something else entirely, it’s nothing too bad. And at its best? He’ll confess his feelings to me... whatever they may be.

Ugh, I feel like I'm about to throw up, my gut feels like it keeps twisting in on itself. Why the fuck am I so nervous? I need to calm down.

I sighed for the umpteenth time this evening, shaking my head in an idiotic attempt to clear it for a second as I stood from my chair, grabbing a hold of both mine and Hanjis empty teacups before I headed into my kitchen, fully intending to brew another batch of tea after I’d finished washing these two cups. But as I finished washing and rinsing the things for a second time, a soft tapping met my ears.

Shit, that must be Eren. Fuck, that was quicker than expected; Hanji sure didn’t waste any time finding him. The crazy probably just skipped around the castle yelling his name until she found him.

Quickly grabbing the cloth that was to the left of me, I dried my hands and made my way over to the door, stopping right in front of the thing, hand resting on the handle as I breathed a calming breath in an attempt to soothe the pounding in my chest. Okay, here goes everything. Tightening my grip, I pushed down the handle to release the latch and opened the door as calmly as possible, my eyes taking in Eren once I did. He was stood, hands clasped behind his back as a small smile rested on his lips, clothed in his casual attire as it’s pretty late into the evening, wearing that green shirt he always wears with the weird looking strings and some ordinary black joggers hiding the majority of his boots.

“Good evening, Captain.” The man’s smile widened with his greeting, the sight unexpectedly making my heart lurch. “Hanji told me you wanted to see me, is that correct?”

“Yes.” I gulped, wetting my lips as my grasp strengthened around the handle. Shit, now that’s he’s here, right in front of me, the ache in my chest has gotten much worse, intensified tenfold. Fuck... okay, calm down, calm your shit.

“Oh, good, for a second there I thought she was playing a prank on me or something.” Eren chuckled, bringing a hand up to rub the back of his neck nervously. “She said, errr, that you wanted to see my... my succulent ass.” I'm fucking going to torture you then kill you fucking dead, Hanji!

“Well, you know how she can be, the bitch is crazy.” The brunette nodded in agreement then, letting another soft laugh leave him as his hand left his neck to tuck a wad of that thick hair of his behind his ear. After that, we kind of both just stared at each other for a moment until I realised I hadn’t moved out of the fucking doorway and invited Eren in. Arghh, fuck! My brain’s scrambled, what the fuck am I doing?! C’mon, get your shit together.

“Would you like to come in?” I asked, voice calm even though my muddled up thoughts and pains in my chest raged on as I took a few steps back, leaving a wide enough gap for Eren to enter if he wished to come in.

“Sure, I’d love to.” Eren sent a sweet smile my way before he entered, the thing just about making my heart jump out of its confines as I shut the door behind him, watching his expression change to an inquisitive one as he took in his new surroundings and walked a little further into my room.

“Whoa, you’ve got a nice place Corporal.” The boy breathed, words sounding full of awe.

“Thank you, but it’s nothing special.” See, in my room it’s pretty much all open plan, my bedroom, office and kitchen is basically one huge room and then threes the bathroom which is just big enough to fit everything you need in it.

“Still doesn’t make it any less nice, though.” I hummed, shrugging.

“Would you mind taking your boots off? Scuff marks are a bitch to get out of hardwood flooring.”

“Oh, no I don’t mind at all! I'm sorry, I should’ve asked, how rude of me.” Eren began to pull each shoe off then, just as a slight blush seeped into his cheeks, his eyes soon fixing to mine as he straightened himself up, making my own cheeks tingle and feel slightly... warm? I wanted to open my mouth and tell him it was alright, but as his gaze stayed on me, it got increasingly difficult to even try to form words. His eyes looked so bright, the contrast of his golden skin with crimson sat nicely atop it made the things look like glistening gemstones. Gemstones so beautiful with the most stunning fragments of colour, I just couldn’t tear my own eyes away, utterly captivated. 

“Umm, where would you like me to put these?” Eren’s voice snapped me out of whatever trance like state I was in then, had my eyes blinking to refocus them on him and his reddening cheeks as my brain tripped over itself to find any type of words to say.

“By errr, by the door’s fine.” The boy nodded, going to do just that as I slapped my hand to my forehead, palm pressing into my skin as I breathed out a string of silent profanities. What the fuck am I doing? Get. It. Together!

“Are... are you okay, Captain?” The brunette’s gaze inspected me then, eyeing the hand that's pressing into my forehead before I pulled it way from my head all too quickly, causing a concerned look to cut across his features.

“Ah, yes. Thank you, but I'm fine. Please, let’s sit.” Eren bobbed his head faintly then, his worried gaze turning into a quizzical one as we made the short distance to my desk. Fuck! Okay, okay, breathe... it’ll be fine from here on out... ugh, fuck me, who am I kiddin’? This is going terribly! Right, just, just keep your cool.

“Take a seat in whichever one you want.” I gestured to the two armchairs placed in front of my desk as I seated myself, leaving Eren to settle himself in one of the two chairs. Shit, I haven’t offered him a beverage or anything.  

“Do... do you want a drink or something?”

“Umm, sure, water please if you have any.” I nodded as I stood, making my way over to the kitchen, pulling out a small glass from my cabinet and filling the thing up with water from the tap that's connected to the main water supply before I shut the running water off and went back over to Eren and handed him his drink a moment before I sat myself back in my seat.  

“Thank you.” The man sent an appreciative smile my way, just before he lifted the glass to his lips and took a few large gulps, which soon lead to him finishing the whole thing.

“Would you like a refill?” C’mon Levi, you didn’t ask him here to offer him an endless supply of water. Ugh, this is pathetic. But no matter how hard I tried, I just couldn’t think properly. This whole liking someone thing is beyond annoying.

“No thank you, not just yet anyway.” I nodded, the action being the last thing I did before I dug deep inside myself to try and find something, anything, to say. But through all my efforts, nothing came to mind. I just didn’t know how to act in a situation such as this one. Hell, I could run into a herd of titans and feel less anxious than I do right now. Why is this proving to be so difficult? Just focus and do as Hanji said, ‘just talk to him’. Yeah... easier said than done.

Silence... nothing but silence spread out and filled the room, so quiet it allowed me to hear my blood rushing through my veins and brain cry out for words to speak. Thankfully though, Eren didn’t seem to mind the quiet so much. He looked like he was sat comfortably, his body looking the complete opposite to mine, relaxed as his bright eyes still wandered around the room as I tried to think up something to say. I couldn’t just blurt out something like, ‘Hey Eren, do you like me?’ because that’d be childish and stupid, I mean I'm not a fucking fourteen year old here! But... but I might as well be, I'm as giddy as one would be in this situation. I can’t stop the anxiety from rising, building and building all the more as the silence drew out, the crippling feeling gaining power over me as I sat all too still, shoulders wound tight and jaw clenching as my mind raced.

“You seem tense.” Eren’s sudden words split through the silence then, pulling me right out of my thoughts, causing me to meet his dangerously beautiful eyes as they roamed up and down my features, the things scrutinizing as he tilted his head to the side slightly. Oh fuck, why is he looking at me like that? He looks like a wild animal eyeing up his prey. Why do I... why do I suddenly feel like I'm a rabbit and he’s a fox?

“I could help you relieve that tension, Captain.” The brunette licked his lips as those lustful eyes of his stayed on me, his voice dripping with his desire as the clear-as-day suggestion rolled off his tongue, shortly adding. “That is if you want me to, of course.” Oh my fucking fuck! What the shit?! Okay-okay, calm down. He... he probably means it in some other way, like... like maybe make me some tea or some shit. That doesn’t necessarily mean what you think it means Levi, get your damn mind outta the mud. Shit, I still haven’t said anything yet, fuck, what should I say?

“Err... what now?” Oh, well that was smooth, wasn’t it?

The brat chuckled then as a wide, amused smile formed on his lips, be it at my reaction or because of whatever expression my face was making right now because oh my fucking shit, I was not ready for this. I thought my mind was a mess before Eren even got here, but now? Now there’s no word to describe how fucked my brain is, it’s frazzled, burnt out, no longer inhabiting any logical or functioning thoughts. All that filled the space between my ears was my desire to leap over this fucking desk and claim those soft looking lips, to rip his clothes off and trail my tongue, my lips, my kisses all over his warm skin.

“You know,” Eren paused as he stood, sending me an impish smile as he ambled over to me, slowly coming up behind me as my heart began to thunder in my chest, a mix of excitement, anxiety and want, bubbling up within me as his warm hands settled on my shoulders. “help take away these knots in your shoulders.” The man’s hands started to move then, thumbs working along the area as he applied just the right amount of pressure, the pads of his thumbs pressing into the central area of my shoulder blades, moving up and down the tense muscle as he leant forward, his lips coming to press close to my ear as he spoke in a low tone.

“I just want to help you relax.” An involuntary shiver ran down my spine then as his hot breath ghosted over my ear and down my neck, his words replying in my mind as my eyelids drifted shut, allowing myself to bask in the wholly satisfying feeling his hands gave me. It felt so good, too good, it took all the strength I had to hold back the sounds that just begged to leave my throat, the soft moans wanting, needing to escape my lips.

“Y’know,” Eren’s low, sultry and silky voice met me then as he began to glide his hands slowly over my collarbones, his long fingers running down my chest and stomach until they stopped at my navel as he rested his chin on my shoulder, his lips right up against the shell of my ear as he spoke in that all too sexy way of his. “there’s many other ways I can help you relax, Corporal.” Oh fuck, don’t, don’t get hard over that! Just... don’t think about it, fuck, this little shit is gunna be the death of me... no y’know what? To hell with it! I think this is a clear enough answer to my question, he can’t mean anything else by this, surly? But, I guess there’s no harm in asking.

“Oh? Care to elaborate, Eren?” I rasped, voice wrecked and gravely almost. Oh but was I glad it came out as husky as it did. My words made a small, soft moan leave Eren’s lips, the delicious thing being breathed into my ear as a shudder ran down his spine at the sound of his name on my lips. Truth be told, I liked the sound of it too. So much so it, and among other things, slowly began to make my joggers feel uncomfortably tight. 

“I’d rather show than tell, if that’s alright by you?” The brunette shifted, bringing his lips even closer to my ear, his breath going down my neck, making the hairs there stand on end as he let his hands wander around my body. His palms no doubt feeling the sporadic thump of my heart as they roamed over the muscles there, permitting another low, sinful sound to roll off his tongue, one that did absolutely nothing to ease the tightness of my pants and pounding of my heart.

“Go ahead, but only if... if it’s alright with you as well.” I don’t know how I managed to get those words out in-between my uneven breaths, all I keep thinking about is those damn lips pressed so close to me yet they’re so far away, I wanted them on me, moaning, breathing out hot cries of my name.

It was then, as I imagined those sugary lips trailing down my neck that a soft laugh came from the man as his hands stilled, resting comfortably over my stomach as he spoke.

“In all honesty, I’ve wanted this for a very long time.” My breath hitched at those words, a confession as good as any as those lips I crave so much finally met my skin, planting gentle kisses at first, making a soft sound pass my lips as he trailed his mouth up and along my neck until the action intensified, beginning to press teasing open-mouthed kisses to my skin as he spoke.

“I’ve wanted your kisses... your touch... I’ve wanted you on top of me... moaning my name as I moan yours, your hips never relenting as you thrust into me. I just... I want you.” A loud moan left me then, no hope in even trying to hold the unholy sounds back any longer as Eren rounded the chair and quickly straddled me. His arms wrapping around my neck as I leant forward to capture his lips with my own, his fingers soon diving into my hair as my arms tightly wound around his waist.

Oh god, this... this is absolutely fucking amazing! I don’t know what I was expecting but it wasn’t this, this feeling, this pleasure, it’s so intense. I feel so high right now, floating way above the clouds. His lips on mine, his body pressed close to my chest, his hands tugging on my hair, keeping our lips connected... it’s making me dizzy, head spinning as the room fades, blurs all around us as this gorgeous man overwhelms my senses in the best of ways. I want more, need more. I need it, I’m getting drunk off his lips, they’re just as intoxicating as those sweet little moans leaving them. Just hearing those delicious sounds makes me want to taste them on my tongue, to swallow them whole, to breathe them in as they fill the air around us.  

Eren whined into my lips then as he suddenly began to grind his hips down into me, the tantalizing friction prying a wanton moan from my throat as my hands moved to slide up his deliciously thick thighs and snuck up the back of the man’s shirt, fingers roaming up his muscles, feeling the warmth of his smooth skin through my own as we both let out a series of hurried breaths. Kiss-swollen lips close together as I bucked my hips up into Eren, causing an all too erotic high-pitched moan to leave him as I took that as an opportunity to explore his mouth, licking my way passed his lips, swirling my tongue around his, the taste of him washing over my tastebuds as he mewled.

“Nnngh, ahh, Levi!” Oh fuck, the sound of my name leaving his lips like a sin made my body hot and cock throb as Eren kept grinding into me the way he was, his movements hard, purposeful. It had me wanting to run my lips and hands all over his body as he continued to breathe out those lustful sounds he was making, fuck, I want them all around me, to be breathed into my skin.

Pulling back to refill my lungs of oxygen, a needy whine left Eren as he threw himself forward and latched onto the junction where my neck and shoulders meet, tongue sweeping across the area as he kissed his way up to my ear, nipping and biting at the skin there, successfully pulling a low moan from my lips as his hands tugged at my shirt and as he bit down on my neck, grinding his hips against mine. Hissing out sharply in pleasure, I detached my arms from the man’s waist and answered his silent question, leaning back and raising my arms up enough to allow the beautiful man to pull the item of clothing up and over my head, the thing coming off with only little difficulty.

“Nnghh, I want you s-so bad, you’re so g-gorgeous Levi! Want you, want you.” Eren moaned as he reattached himself to my neck, trailing his lips down the skin there as his warm hands memorised the feel of my chest, his thrusting hips never relenting against mine as his fingers rolled over every ridge of my muscles, his words, the intoxicating friction just about making my cock plead for its freedom as he pulled a sharp moan from me.

“I-I want you too, Eren.” I breathed, voice becoming completely lost as I groaned in pleasure, jerking my hips up into Eren almost as if to emphasise my point. At that, the man practically melted against me, letting the most sinful sound pass his soft lips as they sucked on my neck harder before he bit down, more than likely leaving teeth marks as he got lost in his own pleasure but I didn’t even give a single shit about that. My body’s getting needy, it welcomed the pleasure the slight pain brought, had my painfully hard dick begging for release, for Eren’s teasing lips on my neck to move down my body until they wrapped around my arousal, his hot tongue licking me into his mouth as the heat of his lust burned all the more.

“W-we should, ahh... probably move this... to the bed.” Eren nodded all too eagerly as my words drifted into his ears, kissing his way up my neck, across my jaw to my lips, another needy whine leaving his lungs as he slipped his tongue into my mouth. I couldn’t help it then; the wanton sound shoved me over my limit, all self-restraint vanishing, had my hands thinking as if they had a mind of their own as they slid up Eren’s beautifully toned muscles before they travelled back down to grab his shirt and pulled it free from his body. My lips soon going back to his neck, kissing, sucking and nipping my way down his beautiful bare chest as he flung his head back and arched into me as an unadulterated moan escaped his lips.

My hands and I thirsted for more, getting hungry and all too greedy as my lips lapped at the man’s collar bone, teeth grazing over the skin before I sucked and nipped there, drawing quick, hurried breaths from those gorgeous red lips as I let out the most unholy sound I’ve ever heard myself make before. My fingertips just needed to touch, feel every bit of his caramel skin, to feel his thundering heartbeat mix with my own pounding heart as I pulled those beautifully sinful sounds from his throat.

“Nnngh, Eren.” I breathed, the moaned words being slightly muffled as I pressed my mouth to his skin, letting my hands wander all over his body, making another one of those delectable little mewls escape him as his thighs and knees began to tremble, his kissed-red chest heaving out a shaky puff of air.

“Hnngh ahh, you’re g-gunna, ahh fuck... m-make me cum if you... if you say that again.”

“What, this?” I grinned darkly into Eren’s skin then as I began to moan, kissing down his chest before I licked a perked nipple into my mouth, hands sliding down his back to grab his plump ass, fingers moulding and squeezing as I pulled him down into me as I rutted my hip up into him. Gently sucking and licking the raised nipple before I pulled back and ran my tongue around the pink bud, making my voice as silky as I could while I moaned into him.

“Eren, Eren, Eren!” A true sound of unadulterated pleasure was freed from the man’s lungs at my honeyed words, causing a string of lustful mewls, low and sharp moans to leave Eren’s throat as I lathered his chest in kisses, taking the bud into my mouth before I let it slide out of my teeth teasingly.

“Ahh, haa Fuck! L-Levi, don’t, d-don’t do that! I almost-mmph!” I cut him off, my lips muffling his words and turning them into moans as I slid my arms around him and stood up from my chair, soon having the tanned man’s arms and legs wrap around me as I made my way to my bed, lips taking his with avidity as our bare chest pressed close together, close enough to feel the hammering of his heart and him no doubt feeling the erratic beat of my own.

Coming up to the bed, I aimed to lay Eren down gently in an attempt to not hurt the brunette in any way shape or form, but what I ended up doing was anything but gentle or graceful for that matter. As we got to the thing, I found that I just couldn’t let go of him and as it seemed, he couldn’t let go of me either. So we both just ended up toppling onto the bed in a tangle of limbs, moans and groans as our lips stayed locked together, never once leaving each other as our hands began to roam the length of the others body. Fingers wandering, memorising the feel of one another, committing every curve, every crevice to memory as our mouths worked in beautiful rhythm together, making the both of us moan all the more as our tongues danced around the other, sliding and mingling together, causing an array of lustful sounds to be breathed out into the thick atmosphere.

Lips trailing down Eren’s neck, my fingers began trembling with excited kind of nerves as they went to his joggers, undoing the drawstring there as the beautiful man’s own hands grabbed at my pants, yanking impatiently at the material as a small irritated sound escaped him. I couldn’t help it then, he’s too cute, a small laugh left me as I tugged the piece of clothing down and threw them to the side, leaving him in only his underwear. After that, I just barely managed to pry my lips off of the brunettes intoxicatingly sweet skin, my eyes immediately gliding down his gorgeous body, taking in every minor detail as my gaze stilled at the small patch of pre-cum staining the man’s last article of clothing.

“Don’t laugh at me.” Eren whined breathlessly, cheeks flushing a beautiful apple red as his hands grabbed a hold of my shoulders, promptly flipping our positions, him pinning me to the bed. His lips quickly returned to mine then as he pressed himself close to me, his chest firmly against mine a moment before he stared trailing kisses down from my lips, my chin, neck, all the way down my chest. Letting his tongue run down the hard lines of my abs, moaning softly into my skin before his fingers tucked into my joggers and pulled them clean off, shortly returning to my heated skin to plant hot, open-mouthed kisses to my hip bones as his hands moved smoothly up my sides as he bit into the area, successfully drawing more than a few wanton moans from my lungs.

“I, I wasn’t laughing at you, ahh, I just... you’re cute.” A sharp exhale of air left my lips then, just as one of Eren’s hands started to palm at the bulge in my underwear as he sucked and nipped his way up my abs, coming to press mind-numbingly passionate kisses to my neck as he spoke.

“I’m... I’m not c-cute.” Eren moaned, his voice as sweet as honey as his hand continued to press against my leaking member, his fingers bringing me dangerously close to that gut twisting pleasure my cock craved.

“Y-yes you are.” I breathed, hand coming to bury my fingers into the man’s silky hair as a deep moan left us both. After that, Eren chose not to reply with words, instead he ran steamy kisses down my neck, chest until he was hovering above my pulsing arousal. Just the sight had a low moan leaving my throat, realisation quickly sinking in after at what’s about to happen.

“You don’t h-have to, ahh, shit, you don’t have to do that if you don’t want-” My voice suddenly cut out then as Eren slid his fingers into my underwear and pulled them down, soon discarding them, a deep red seeping into his cheeks as his hungry eyes took in my proud-standing cock, running that hot tongue of his over his lips before he brought the delicious things back to my hip bone, licking, biting, kissing a line to the inside of my thighs.

“Ahh, ahh fuck, Eren!” A throaty moan worked its way up from my lungs then as Eren took a hold of my arousal, his warm skin sending waves of beautiful pleasure all through my body as he licked a teasing line up from the base of my cock, prying a gasp-of-a-moan from my lips as his tongue started to circle the crown, swiping the delicious thing over the tip a few times a moment before he sucked me into his mouth.

“Nnnghh Eren, oh fuck, haa ahh!” A truly unadulterated moan escaped my lungs as the heat of this beautiful man’s mouth engulfed me, eyes falling shut as I gritted my teeth together, fingers grabbing a vice like hold onto the bed sheet as I leant my head back. The utterly sinful sound pulling a low mewl from Eren as he began to bob his head in an all too slow rhythm, his fiery tongue sucking me into his hot mouth as he moaned, the sound sending glorious vibrations through my body as his pace quickened, then slowed to only speed up again, getting closer and closer to taking me to the hilt each and every time he sped up.  

Fuck, those wanton moans coming from Eren as he sucks me further into his mouth, those sinful sucking sounds mixing with my own hurried, almost high-pitched breaths as I free more and more of those lustful noises from my throat, the both of us groaning in pleasure, it’s all too much! I, I can’t, won’t, be able to hold on for much longer.

Prying my eyes open as a shaky moan left me; I looked down after my blurry vision just about returned to normal and fuck, was that a bad idea. Eren bright and all too sexy half lidded eyes connected with mine as he took me to the hilt, moaning deeply as his other hand palmed himself through his underwear before he pulled back his lips, sweeping his tongue up from the base of my cock while my eyes were watching him. The sight had my heart trembling, pushed me closer to that ever-nearing edge, almost sent me toppling over it, very nearly making me cum hard right then and there.

“Ahh ahh, f-fuck, Eren, come here.” The man moaned as my fingers found their way into his gorgeous hair, pulling his mouth off of my throbbing member with an audible ‘pop’ before I wrapped my arms around him and pinned his body to the bed with mine. Hands travelling down his body with one destination in mind as my fingertips found the band of his soaked underwear, quickly grabbing the thing as Eren began to wriggle and lift his body in an attempt to make the task easier.

Finally pulling the pesky marital away, I threw it over the side of the bed without a care, leaning back to let my gaze wash over this gorgeous man, eyes practically eating up the stunning view as my breathing faltered... he’s truly beautiful. His tanned skin looked almost as if it glowed in the low lighting of the room, his lidded eyes shining as they stared back at me. His beautifully toned chest raised and fell rapidly as he took in air by the lungful, arms comfortably resting above his head as I raked my eyes up and down his torso until they followed the line of brown hair falling below his bellybutton and fuck... Eren’s just as hard as I am, his cocks looking just about ready to burst. Fuck, he’s remarkable, so gorgeous, breathtaking ahh, I can’t hold myself back. I have to have him.

Hurling myself forward, I slid my hands up Eren’s sides as his arms wrapped around my neck eagerly, pulling me down as he brought himself up to meet my lips. Shoving my tongue into his mouth, I jerked my hips into his, my arousal rubbing against his own fully hard member, gaining delicious friction as a gasp escaped Eren, causing him to arch his back as his breath hitched.

“Nnngh, ahh L-Levi! Want you already, haa I, w-want you.” The brunette mewled into my lips as he brought his legs up around me, grinding his hips up into me, drawing a wanton moan from my lungs as his soft lips kissed me harder and with more passion.

“Y-you have any lube?” I hummed into his lips, hand smoothly running down his sides, his beautiful thighs to tap his knee gently as a gesture for him to unwrap his legs while my other hand cupped his crimson stained cheek a moment before I pulled back from his lips.

“Don’t move from this spot.” Eren nodded, removing his legs from my waist as a soft, cute little whine escaped him as my husky demand met his ears.

“I-I wasn’t p-planning on it.” The man leant forward, placing a hot kiss to my lips before he pulled back and breathed a single word that sounded more like a moan. “Hurry.”

Letting a low moan roll off my tongue, I clambered off of the bed and almost ran to my nightstand even though it was a couple of steps away, practically throwing open the drawer before I began rummaging around the thing, fingers wildly searching until they snagged the glass bottle I was looking for. Shoving the drawer shut, I hastily made my way back to Eren, climbing onto the bed and bringing myself to hover over him once again, dropping the lube to the side of me as the beautiful man lifted his arms up to wrap them around my neck once more.

But before I could connect my kiss-swollen lips with his and yank the cork out of the bottle to pour the thick substance onto the palm of my hand, I just barely managed to stop myself, having more than enough consciousness to remember to voice this question.   

“Have you done anything like this before?” Eren’s expression morphed into one of confusion then before he caught onto what I was asking, his cheeks flushing a deeper shade of that gorgeous red before he averted his eyes.

“I’ve done s-some stuff to myself but n-not with... not with anyone else before.” Oh fuck, he looks too cute, I could just- whoa, wait a second... that’d mean... I couldn’t stop it nor help it then. This, this unbelievably warm feeling sprung up within me and planted itself there as it began to bloom inside my chest as a small smile formed on my lips, the brunettes words making me surprisingly... happy. I’m his first...

“D-does that bother you?” Eren fixed his unsure gaze to me, his beautiful eyes looking so uncertain and... slightly afraid, of what the answer might be.

“No, not at all.” I cupped the man’s cheek, voice tender as my thumb stroked across his heated skin, hopefully soothing the last of his worries as I continued. “Just promise me this one thing?”

“Please tell me if I'm going too fast, if I'm hurting you or if you’re uncomfortable in any sense of the word, okay? I’ll stop right away; you just have to tell me.”

“I promise.”

“Good.” I leant forward then, bringing our lips together for a brief moment, the kiss being more chaste and gentle than I expected it to be, but honestly, I didn’t mind that at all. And neither did Eren, in fact, he seemed to like it a lot. Had a content little sound leaving him a second before I pulled back, lips tracing feather light kisses down his neck until they heated, becoming sloppy almost as my lust started to boil over, my own desire becoming too much for me to handle as I bit down into his caramel skin.

“Nnnghh Levi, I w-want you, please!” Eren whined as his fingernails bit into my back, the needy plea leaving his lips like a sin, causing a pang of lust to shoot through me as the man jerked his hips up into mine, drawing a wholly sinful sound from my throat.

My hand shot out to the side of me then, fingers stumbling around blindly, searching and soon finding the medium-sized bottle as Eren began to wriggle impatiently underneath me, an adorable blush soon settling on his cheeks as I leant back, his eyes taking in the bottle of lube as I uncorked the thing and poured a generous amount into the palm of my hand, spreading the thick liquid around my fingers, making sure they’re fully coated.

Shifting my gaze to Eren, my eyes examined his one last time, searching for any signs of discomfort before the beautiful man nodded his head, spreading his legs wider for me before he shuffled down a little bit, getting comfortable. Gently nodding in return, I positioned myself in-between his thighs and captured his soft lips as his arms returned to wrap themselves around my neck, tongue sweeping across the sweet things before it entered his mouth and interweaved with his as a lustful sound left us both, my hand going to his entrance, finger circling around a few times before I slipped the digit in.

The most wanton cry left Eren’s throat then, his arms squeezing around me and pulling me closer as I began to smoothly move my finger in and out of him, the sinful mewls and moans landing hotly on my tongue as he took my lips with mind-blowing avidity, fervour as my movements started to quicken, adding a second finger.

“Ahhh!” The brunette breathed, the soft moan soon morphing, changing into one of slight pain as I started to do a scissoring motion with the two fingers, pushing the digits deeper, those sounds only strengthening after I added a third.

“I’m sorry, the pain shouldn’t last for much longer.” Eren nodded weakly, another little whimper escaping him as I began to move all three fingers in and out of him, spreading them around and wide in hopes of finding that one sweet spot that’ll take away most of the pain and replace it with immense euphoria. But as I continued to work my fingers, I couldn’t help but notice the little whines coming from Eren every now and then, it sounded like I was causing him great pain.

“Do you want me to sto-“

“N-no! It’s just a weird sensation, please, don’t stop.” I scanned Eren’s features for a second then, my eyes locking with his faintly watery ones before I nodded, deciding to close my hand around his throbbing member to replace the pain he’s feeling with pleasure, pumping my hand in time with my fingers as they spread wide and pushed deeper, lips coming to meet with his as they did.

At that, Eren let a low mewl leave him, arching his back into me as my other hand paid close attention to the man’s arousal, stroking the length of him as I drove the three digits inside him, slowly drawing them out to push them back in, pulling all those utterly delicious sounds from those plump lips I love to kiss so much.

“Haa ahh! Y-yes, Levi, it’s starting to feel g-good ahh!” I grinned, kissing my way across his jaw and down his neck as I continued to work him both ways, drawing constant breathless moans as I breathed my groans of pleasure into his heated skin, basking in the way his body shook, trembled underneath me as I bit into the sweet warmth of his skin.

“You sound so sexy Eren, I love the way you moan for me, it’s intoxicating.” I breathed, muffling my husky, wanton words with his skin, causing a purely sinful sound to escape him as one of his hands moved to grab a fistful of my hair as he moaned. My lips sucking his skin into my mouth as my hand pumped him fast, fingers unrelenting as they drove further into him, impossibly deep before they finally brushed up against something.

And in that moment my fingers prodded that spot, Eren’s mouth swung open, an erotic, high-pitched sound leaving him in a rush as his entire body began to quake. The sight and sound alone bringing me right up to the brink of that gut twisting pleasure as my own lustful sounds were thrown into the mix.

“Ahh aahh f-fuck! L-Levi, that felt amazing, d-do that again!” The beauty didn’t even have to ask me twice as I nudged my fingertips into that sweet spot again, pulling my lips off his skin to watch with lidded eyes, setting Eren’s body alight with pleasure as a string of incomprehensible words left him, the beautiful sounds coming up to dance around my head before they floated into my ears, the strength of them making me dizzy as the man’s body quivered.

“That’s it, moan for me Eren.” I moaned, thrusting my fingers into that sensitive spot over and over again, making an all too arousing sound escape the man’s throat as I watched his whole body shudder.

“F-fuck, ahhh! L-Levi, I-I need you now, n-need you!” Eren moaned, his hand coming to grab the back of my head, quickly pulling me down to him as his delicious lips claimed mine to be his, shoving his tongue into my mouth before he sucked in my bottom lip and released it through his teeth.

“Fuck.” I groaned, attacking his lips with mine before I slipped my fingers out of him, causing a small whine to leave him. But that whine soon cut off as I settled both my hands on the gorgeous man’s hips, shifting him closer to me before I wrapped my hand around my painfully hard cock, covering the remaining lube on my hand over my member in a few teasing strokes while Eren’s gem like eyes watched hungrily. Eyeing me eagerly as I leant forward, one hand coming to smooth its way down his gloriously thick hips and under his thighs to bring his leg up around me before I lined the tip of my cock with his entrance, slowly pushing my hips forward, prying a mix of low moans and mewls from our throats as I did so.

“Nnngh ahh! Oh my... fuck, ahhh!” Eren let out a sharp gasp of pleasure then, his other leg soon lifting and wrapping itself around my waist, tilting his head back as I watched myself slowly disappear inside him.

“Nnngh, Eren, you feel so amazing around me. So... ahhh, tight.” I gritted my teeth, hurried puffs of hot air escaping through the things as Eren continued to squeeze around me, his body trembling, mouth wide open as his cheeks became even redder, moaning those delicious sounds all the louder as I bottomed out.

God he feels so good, him clenching around me like this feels way, way too good. Fuck, I seriously don’t know how long I’ll last, I'm so close already and I haven’t even started to move yet. This is just too stimulating, all the nerves in my body feel like their standing on end, electrified, all my senses heightened and amplified to the maximum. This feeling is... is pure euphoria. I can’t believe I was so afraid, terrified to even find out if Eren had any feelings for me, I was a complete wreck. And now look at me, moaning, fingernails biting into the flesh of his hips, deep inside him as his moans meet with mine.

I could never have imagined this to happen when I asked him here. I just wanted to figure shit out, find myself some answers... and answers is exactly what I received and then some.

“Ahhh fuck, L-Levi, you can start to move.” The gorgeous man moaned, the utterly lustful sound causing a low, sinful sound of my own to escape as Eren’s arms pulled me down to meet with his sweet lips, tongues sliding together as I began to ease myself in and out of him, my movements starting out slow and steady before they began to speed up.

“Fuck, y-yes! Haa, ahhh!” The brunette moaned, his back arching up off of the bed as I thrust my hips into him with strength, unable to hold myself back as those intoxicating sounds continue to fly up from his mouth, encouraging me, begging me to thrust harder as a guttural moan worked its way up my throat to be breathed into those sugary lips.

“Nnn Eren, feels so good, you’re so beautiful, so sexy.” I murmured, not even a second later having Eren’s saccharine tongue tracing over my lips, nipping and sucking teasingly a moment before he pushed the muscle into my mouth, intertwining around mine before he pulled back with a gasp on his lips. His legs around me pushing me down to meet his hips as his nail’s dug into my skin, body shivering and trembling as I pulled out so only the tip of my cock was inside him before I slammed back into his heat, promptly hitting that pleasure inducing area right on the mark, my rhythmic assault on the beautiful bundle of nerves only strengthening as Eren began to squirm and moan breathlessly.  

“Aahhh! L-Levi! Touch me, I-I want you to- ahh!” Eren moaned, my grip on his wiggling hips tightening before one hand slid across his smooth, hot skin, more than happy to satisfy the beautiful man until all he could do was quiver and call my name. Fingers coming to wrap around his leaking arousal, my hand stroked the length of him, spreading the vast amount of pre-cum that was practically trickling all down his member an dripping onto his stomach as a pure unadulterated mewl left his lips and as an all too husky moan left me.

“Nnngh ahh, y-yes, Levi, faster.” The demand landed hotly on my ears, short-winded and needy, but a request I’d be all too happy to fulfil all the same as I grunted in pleasure, gladly carrying out the man’s wish, quickening my movements, hips beginning to slam into him with vigour, power and accuracy. Thrusting deep and hitting that beautiful bundle of nerves as my hand pumped him hard, causing a high-pitched, breathless cry to leave his throat, his body trembling in the wake of the intense sensation.

“Aahhh! Nnnghhaa fuck, Levi! I’m g-gunna-” And before he could even finish what he was saying, I snapped my hips forward, my throbbing and almost bursting cock unrelenting on that sensitive spot as we both drew closer to our climax, breathing laboured and heavy as my movements became uneven, hips jolting and becoming wild even as my hand pumped him hard, thumb sliding over the tip of his cock as I rammed into that sensitive spot one last time before a breathless cry of my name rolled off his tongue as he came. Bursts of pearly white cum spilling out of him and onto his torso, splattering onto his chest, the sight mixed with the sound leaving his lips made my eyes blur and spot with beautiful stars. Had a breathless gasp of ecstasy leaving him as he toppled over his pleasure and pushed me over the edge of my own as I spilled everything I had to give, never relented my hips from slamming into him, drawing out our pleasure as Eren continued to squeeze and clench around me as a guttural moan of his name left me as I came.

With trembling knees, my thrusts finally came to an end as I rode out the wave of pure ecstasy before I collapsed onto Eren with a breathy moan, his sticky cum-covered chest clinging to mine for a second before I rolled off to the side of him, our raged breaths leaving us both in a rush as we just laid there for a moment, basking in the warm glow of the high we gave each other, grasping onto it before the feeling subsided.

“Holy fuck, that was...” I gulped, trailing off as my tongue darted out across my lips as I panted, looking to the side of me to meet Eren’s beautiful gem like eyes as he turned to meet mine.    

“Absolutely fucking amazing?” I grinned, eyes taking in Eren’s crimson filled cheeks a moment before he himself sent me a toothy smile, his beautiful eyes sparkling in the dim light as his breath left him in hot puffs of air, his words filling me with pride and making me glad to hear that he was fully satisfied.

“You can say that again, that’s the best sex I've had in a while.” Eren’s grin only widened at my words, the side of his eyes crinkling in an all too intriguing manner before he blushed further and shied away briefly. 

“Well, it’s the best I've ever had too.” The brunette chuckled at his own joke, lifting a hand to cover his mouth a second after, almost as if to smother the beautiful sound. It made me want to reach forward and pull his hand away so I could hear more of the enticing thing and before I knew it, my hand had moved on its own, doing exactly that. My moderately cold fingers taking his warm ones, pulling his hand away from his reddened, kiss-swollen lips as I leant up on my elbows, hovering over him slightly before my hand went to cup his cheek gently, thumb smoothing over his unbelievably warm skin as a soft smile formed on my lips.

“Mmm, it helps that I really like the person I'm with.” A tremendous red seeped further into Eren’s cheeks then, his eyes widening as his brain searched for words.

“R-really? You... you really like me?” I nodded, leaning forward to gently press my lips to his, planting a few light kisses before I leant back.

“I really do.” More than I ever thought possible.

Eren practically melted then, his surprised features changing to a soft smile as he brought his hand up to my cheek, his hand sliding to the back of my head, running up the short hairs there before his fingers threaded through the longer strands and pulled me down to meet his lips. Mouths working smoothly against one another, gentle as we just got lost in ourselves, chests coming to press close to each other as the chaste kiss went on for a few long, tender moments more before I pulled back, my gaze fixing with his... loving one. The emotion in his eyes made my heart jump out of my chest, had this warm, fuzzy feeling grow inside my stomach. I can’t describe this feeling; I simply can’t put it into words. My heart just feels so... so happy, right now.

Eren’s looking up at me in the same way I catch him looking up at the starts and the moon when its full, bright and high up in the sky. His eyes are full with wonder, admiration and endearment. I'm speechless, just utterly... blown away by him. All I craved to do now is just to take him into my arms, wrap my body up with his as I kiss away at those plump lips, purely just to stay close to him, to keep him warm even though his body is well heated on its own. Hell, he’d probably be the one warming my body, but that’s no bother to me, I just want to keep him in my arms forever... to keep him safe and away from harm.

It was then, as all my thoughts were made clear to me, that a soft, little sound passed Eren’s lips. The thing drawing me out of my head and back into the room, eyes refocusing on the stunning man in my arms as he nestled into me, his head coming to rest in the crook of my neck as I wrapped my arms around him, pulling him close into me as I shuffled to lie comfortably on my side.  

“Mmm, you’re so warm.” Eren mumbled sleepily, tiredness thick in his voice as he tangled our legs together, a content sigh soon leaving him after he yawned into my skin as he cuddled even closer. Just the sight alone had me weary eyed, his calm breathing soothing me, slowly lulling me to sleep as my skin soaked up his warmth, his body heat much more intense due to his shifting ability but that within on itself was far more comforting than I could’ve ever imagined. His tranquil breathing, his unbelievably warm skin extremely close to mine felt so good, made me feel... serene.

“I... I love... love you.” Eren murmured, soon slipping further into his subconscious as his breathing deepened, his soft-spoken words leaving his lips like a whisper. That very simple, yet very powerful word hit me head on, straight into my pounding heart as it thundered with joy.

“Hm, funny you say that...” I smiled softly, leaning down to press one last, tender kiss into Eren’s forehead before I snuggled up to the beautiful man, bringing myself as close as possible.

“I was just thinking the same thing.” And with that, I let my eyes drift shut, soaking up this overwhelming feeling of love and warmth as it wrapped itself around me, pulling Eren closer to me before I allowed sleep to lead me into the most peaceful nights rest I've had in years.

Finally feeling warm, happy and... loved.