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James wasn't just a member of the group,
never just the oldest,
and never just the silly, weird one he claims to be.
He is much more than that.
Every now and then, he checks on his members during practice— candid gestures like a pat the back or a quiet “you okay?” The members admired the vigilance in him, especially when they crave to be noticed.
1.
It happened on a Monday night, when the whole team insisted on staying up until 3 am to practice.
The air was thick with fatigue. The mirror fogged with condensation from the frigid air blowing from the AC. The room was engulfed with nothing but the relentless replay of the pre-hook, shoes squeaking, and Martin counting to eight. James was hyper aware of every wrong step, every delayed movement. His instincts flared each time something slipped out of rhythm. Everything was running smoothly—until he noticed.
“Juhoon, you good?” James asked whilst patting the boy’s back.
He had noticed the alarming switch in his composure, the tremor in his voice when asking for help, the pale cast across his face. They were all impossible to miss. At least for him.
Juhoon nodded, reassuring him. But James knew. He always did. The clammy heat from Juhoon’s skin seeping through the fabric of his shirt gave it away.
He signalled to Martin—the one leading the team despite being exhausted himself— to call for a break.
“Okay, take a breather y’all, we’ll continue after ten minutes.” He announced, his tone cracking but light enough to lift up the mood.
Groans ensued. Keonho sprawled flat on the crisp wooden floor. Martin was already reaching for his water bottle, and Seonghyeon flopped down beside Keonho, panting and gasping for air. The mirror had seen it all— the sweat trickling down their foreheads, the crumple on their faces when breathing became too heavy,
and Juhoon’s unfocused eyes.
Without hesitation, James yanked a bottle of water from the corner and handed it to Juhoon. He sat next to him, not too close yet not too distant, just there. Juhoon was clearly fading.
“Breathe,” James whispered, voice laced with worry and warmth.
A faint smile tugged on his lips despite himself. He didn’t want his hyung to worry, although his body was on the verge of collapsing.
“Hey,” James said, meeting his gaze. “Look at me. You’re okay.”
And Juhoon did as he was told. The world blurred around him, but James remained clear— his anchor. He took a deep breath, and another, shaky but real. His eyes never left James, not while he was the only thing holding him upright.
“I’m…okay.” Juhoon’s murmured.
“Yes you are.” James replied, steady and soft. "You need to step out for a moment?” James questioned, a warm smile plastered on his face.
Juhoon nodded. Together they stepped outside where the air no longer felt too tight. He inhaled deeply, keeping each breath stable. Through it all, James stayed by his side, silent but present.
When Juhoon finally steadied, he shifted his eyes to James, a grateful smile creeping up on his face.
“I feel fine now, Hyung. Thank you.”
And James gave his brotherly nod— one of unwavering consolation. This is one of the countless reasons why James is special in his own way, his instinct to notice, his calm amidst exhaustion, his unspoken duty to care. And that’s what makes him more than just a member of the group—
he’s their reliable constant,
the human definition of solace.
2.
The second time James proved how loving he truly is was when one of his members were in desperate need of a companion— and that was Seonghyeon.
It was their off-day in LA, some choosing to stay in their serene abode whilst the others ventured out to explore. Being the audacious man he is, James considered visiting the amusement park in search for a thrill. Of course, that idea of his wouldn’t have resorted to a solo adventure.
“Can I come with you, James Hyung?” Seonghyeon, who was already pulling up his Spiderman printed socks, asked with twilight in his eyes.
“Sure! I can’t possibly go alone.” James chimed.
He waited for the younger to put on his shoes at the door, then went on with their journey towards their awaited destination: the Universal Studios Hollywood.
The two pranced their way into the theme park, terror and anticipation crawling up their nerves. They took in the sight they were met with; the swarm of guests, the mind-boggling heights of the roller coaster tracks, and the daunting, gut-wrenching view of teary souls vomiting, kids looking sick to their stomach while some were frantically pacing back and forth. All at once.
“Might be us after an hour.” James cracked a joke, seemingly lightening up the already tense mood.
“Yea” Seonghyeon replied, voice cracking at the edges as a laugh forced out of his mouth.
James noticed—Of course he did—the half-hearted response and the undeniable strain on his shoulders. He didn’t say anything though, just giving a light pat on the back to loosen him up. They both strolled around the park in both excitement and fear, wondering what was in store for them.
“Should we try something easy first? Like, that one?” James suggested whilst pointing towards a ride.
It didn't look as daunting, just a usual roller coaster ride with not much complicated turns. Not too high, not too fast. Seonghyeon nodded as they both took off to the beeline towards the entrance. Deep breaths coiled up, as if the air surrounding them pressed down on their lungs. Their heartbeats slammed against their ribs— a silent reminder of what they chose.
Seonghyeon looked a little too worried, as if he’d fall apart at any moment. James instantly dropped down from sitting on the railings, and approached him.
“You sure you wanna do this? If it’s too overwhelming we can just try out the bumper rides.”
James soothed him with his gentle voice and smile.
Seonghyeon looked up from his daze, hints of reluctance creeping up his face—too clear to miss.
“But, you’ve been waiting to come here, haven’t you?” He stammered, eyes glistening. “I’m sorry. I’m just not ready. I don't know what's gotten into me." His eyes trailed down to the floor, guilt plastered on his face.
James reached for his shoulder, rubbing small circles to calm him down before speaking,
“It’s okay to be scared, Hyeon. I wanted to try the bumper cars too!”
That made Seonghyeon lift up his head to face him, a faint but visible smile decorating his lips. James found that cute, like a little boy with a glimmer of joy in his eyes.
Then they both headed towards the bumper cars. Fortunately, the line wasn’t too long. They managed to get on the cars in no time. It started off with a blast— cars already bumping against each other’s as laughter and yells of excitement filled up the air. James kept his eyes on Seonghyeon, deliberately tracking him down to ram his car into his. An immediate hearty chuckle escaped from him, leaving a warm feeling in James’ chest. He was heartened to see him so gleeful, contrasting from the earlier gloom.
The friendly battle ended after a few minutes. They ran off to a nearby shop for some ice cream in the immense summer a heat, as well as a visit to the store where a plethora of fancy apparel laid in display. The cold air from the AC hugged the two tight as they entered the store.
“Seonghyeon! You have to wear this.” James held out a fox headband to the said boy.
The younger gave in and wore it on his head, earning a nod of approval and admiration. They wandered off to the other side, where kiddish clothes hung up on the racks. The two teased and laughed relentlessly, forcing each other to try on ridiculous clothes that seemed amusingly suited for them.
They left the store with a headband on their heads and three other keychains for the other members, moving on to the next ride. Now that they had kicked off the day with a light teaser, Seonghyeon was ready to take a step further. He challenged himself to the earlier rides that they planned to go on. As they both lined up to the entrance, James stayed close to him, showering Seonghyeon with words of reassurance and encouragement.
“It shouldn’t be that bad, trust me. It’ll be fun!”
It was safe to say that it sort of worked. Seonghyeon’s nerves eases a little bit as he was hovering over the railings for a clear view of the line. He couldn’t wait to get on and get it over with, though fear still lingered in his head. But that was replaced with a thrill when they finally reached the end of the line after what seemed like eternity.
“You prefer sitting outside or inside? I’m fine with any-“
“Inside, please. Lowkey scared I might somehow fall off to the side.”
James chortled at that response. A slight sense of relief curled up in him. Thankfully, the boy who was once petrified was now calm enough to crack a joke.
And so they both sat on the seats—Seonghyeon in the middle of James and a vacant seat—waiting for the ride to take off. In a trice, the seat moved up, in a slow but frightening pace. Once in a while, James would turn to his side to check on Seonghyeon, and was greeted with a closed-eyed Hyeon.
“Don’t close your eyes man, just enjoy the moment.” James said, patting his lap. “It’ll be fine, just scream all you want.”
The younger listened, his lashes fluttering open. Then the speed heightened, leaving them no room to prepare. Yells and prayers enveloped the air. James whipped his arms above his head in pure ecstasy, screaming at the top of his lungs. The other boy however, was already deep in his temporary coma.
The ride ended in a swift, unexpected spin, making the two jolt from their seats. Once the ride slowed down to a stop, everyone exhaled in relief— a breathe, "it's finally over."
The two boys stumbled around as if in a trance, navigating themselves towards the exit. Seonghyeon was dazed, clearly, as he clumsily approached a random rock to sit on nearby.
"Nah bro, no more for me."
James laughed, handing him a bottle of water. He sat next to him, observing. Ready to act swiftly upon seeing a gag or any form of change in expression. That was all that mattered. His company, his thoughtfulness, just him—
James.
They returned home with a sore back and throat, accompanied by an unspoken brotherly love that wasn't meant to be said out loud. It had always been there, between them, quiet but electric; an unshaken bond.
3.
James never had to express his love for his members using words. Not once. Only through his actions, no matter how brief they were.
And the members know all too well.
Back when they were trainees, things had been a little too hectic: rushed choreographies, monthly assessments, exams clashing with practice, excessy scolding. It was agonizing.
But it never stopped James from caring.
Apparent from his little gestures of kindness, ones that never fail to warm up the mood. He handed tissues and drinks to his members although no one ordered him to. He would treat them coffee, comfort them when they quietly yearn for it, and even spend sleepless nights fixing and improvising steps to their choreographies. L
One night, James and Keonho were in the back of the car whilst on their way back to the house after their third day of camp in Los Angeles. The air hung heavy with deafening silence, uncomfortable and fragile, as if one word would start something unwanted. That was all because of a fight that ignited between Martin and Keonho earlier that day.
They were in the process of creating a song, a melody that suits everyone's interests and taste. But clearly, Keonho and Martin had a stark contrast in ideas. A disagreement between them led to a whole argument. Apparently, Keonho had insisted on changing the backup vocals to something more loud and frisky, while Martin argued that it was unnecessary and improper considering the slow-paced melody they were working on.
"It's too boring and lifeless. Like, there'a no soul."
"I think it's perfect-"
"No, it's lacking something. It's lacking energy."
It was like an endless ping pong match, a battle that none of the others—Juhoon, Seonghyeon and James— hope to continue.
"So, what are you suggesting, Keonho?"
"I'm saying we should change the backup vocals."
"For god's sake Keonho,please understand. It messes up the pace and the mood. I thought we all agreed to keep it that way?"
"Yea I know but I changed my mind."
"The others didn't. So we keep it this way."
"Are you serious?"
"Yes, not everything should be your idea Keonho."
"But I disagree, I'm part of the group too you know?"
"And? The world doesn't revolve around you. So please."
That shattered something in Keonho. James saw it, the shift in his expression, the way it softened into something tender and hurtful. It was undeniable, James thought. But he also noticed Martin's shock, as if he didn't meant to say it.
James knew it was just overwhelming stress that fueled their anger, so he tried his very best to break them up from their verbal fight before it became too intense. But that didn't stop them. Not at all.
So James would try again— to set a mutual agreement between the two. Yet, it started something else.
"Hey, c'mon, let's not fight-"
"Stop meddling, hyung!" Keonho snapped.
That was it, the fiery eyes and tone that erupted from him. It turned everything into a silent game, trailing behind them the whole ride home.
Tension coiled deep in their stomachs. Every breath, every movement was controlled. Not a single person moving an inch.
But deep down, James wanted the tension to settle down, to be replaced by relief. He glanced towards Keonho, who was very much lost in thought whilst gazing outside the window. James sighed, soft enough for only him to hear. He decided to bring it up later, after both Martin and Keonho had cooled down.
The air conditioner in the car hummed. After what felt like eternity, they finally arrived dorm.
The members stepped out of the car in heavy steps, dragging their legs. Once they were in, everyone divided. Juhoon headed to the bathroom, Martin to the couch, Seonghyeon at the kitchen heating up food and Keonho sprinting into his room.
He followed Keonho mutely, shutting the door behind them and sitting at the edge of his bed. He watched Keonho silently, clearly deep in thought as he yanked a piece of clothing from his wardrobe.
James hesitated a little before finally breaking the silence.
"Hey, Keonho?"
The younger freezed, before replying him, eyes static and fixed on the shirt in his hands. He hadn't realized James followed him to the room until then.
"Hm?"
He clenched his fists, gripping the shirt like an anchor. James hesitated again, but continued anyway.
"You feeling okay?"
Keonho finally faced him, his expression tight as if holding tears from falling. He pursed his lips before muttering a soft, "mhm".
"You know, you can talk to me if you want to. I'm here for you." James smiled softly, voice soothing and tender.
"Hyung." Keonho's voice rasped.
Then it broke. all the pent-up emotions released and tears rolled down his cheeks.
A broken cry spilled as he turned away, not wanting to reveal his disheveled face.
"Come here."
James patted on the space next to him, signalling him to take a seat. And so Keonho did. He slowly carried himself towards the space beside James, stifling his cries and wiping his tears.
"I'm sorry, hyung, for lashing out on you earlier." Keonho murmured.
"It's okay, I know you were just too angry. I shouldn't have stepped in too."
"No, it's not your fault. You were just trying to help" Keonho shot his eyes at him.
"I know. But it's fine, Keonho. As long as you feel better now."
A soft smile tugged at Keonho's lips.
"I do, hyung. Thank you."
For a second, they just kept quiet, appreciating each other's company.
"You should talk it out with Martin when you're both ready."
"Yea I probably should."
With that, they both separated. James gave words of encouragement to Keonho before he finally approached Martin at the living room. His hands were nervously fidgeting, tugging at his shirt as he finally talked.
James watched the scene from afar: the grin forming on Martin's face, Keonho reaching out to pull the older in a comforting hug.
And thankfully, they both returned back to normal the next day, just as James thought.
He knew that all they had to do was communicate and be honest with each other, and he was right.
That shaped his character as the oldest— a brave and understanding hyung that his members could rely on anytime.
Once again he proved how much he cares for his members.
4.
It was his instinct to spot changes in his members' behaviours, to take action as the eldest. And so, he often makes sure the leader, Martin, feels the warmth from the eldest too.
Every single time Martin craved for a listening ear, James would be there.
When Martin wanted to vent, it was James whom he ran to. And James, in a heartbeat, would rush to him, refusing to let him carry the weight of the leader alone.
And when Martin needed humor to light up his mood, James would be there— to entertain him. Without a fail.
That day, Martin had stayed behind in the studio to write lyrics, along with Seonghyeon, who unsurprisingly fell asleep on the couch whilst waiting for the older. And so, Martin let his sleepy friend be. Knowing how lonely the leader might feel, James decided to visit him for company.
The door clicked behind him as he sat on the couch next to Seonghyeon, who was already snoring profusely.
"Hah, im sending this to the group chat." James joked, taking pictures of the sleeping boy.
Martin laughed along. But James noticed the cracks in his laughter, devoid of stress and exhaustion. He continued to work, listening and replaying the audio over and over again. Soon, nothing but the faint sound of clicking and the melody hung in the air. Then Martin broke the silence:
"Hyung, you can go to sleep first ya know."
He fixed his gaze on the older— a slight tremor in his expression, to which James assumed it was sleep deprivation, judging from how often the boy had stayed behind the past few days until past midnight.
"Not sleepy yet. You should continue tomorrow, tin." James replied, approaching him with slow steps, careful not to wake the sleeping Sean.
"Almost done."
James knew that wasn't true. He had said this countless of times before and yet, hours stretched until five in the morning. Too palpable. So James didn't let his guard down. He stayed, no matter how long it took Martin to give in to his eyes that are aching to close.
James noticed. Of course he did.
How the boy was out of it, dozing off slightly for just a few seconds then pinching himself awake. James sighed, low and incoherent. He understands deeply the weight of the leader and the main producer of the team, but he also knew how badly Martin needed to sleep, to shut off his brain and get the weight off his shoulders for once. To choose his mental health.
The clock passed three— the 'tick' sound sending sparks in Martin's brain, urging him to push through.
On the other end, James kept throwing ideas, his creativity allowing Martin to stress a little less, albeit the subtle jokes laced in their discussion. At least that made Martin smile and laugh, James thought. That was what the group craved; a glimmer of joy amidst professionalism and relentless solemnity. Just a reminder that they are more than coworkers—they are each other's solace.
As they continued to talk, the clock hit 4 am. The faint buzz from the air conditioner engulfed the air. Martin had long drifted to dreamland, his snores overlapping with Seonghyeon's. James found it hilarious, so he recorded a short video of them to save as a keepsake.
He carefully hit 'save' on the computer, securing the song they had crafted together.
The next morning, the two clueless souls woke up in the studio, feeling the cold breeze encompassing them instead of their usual duvet wrapped around them in their dorm. Martin recalled the night before, where James had been there to accompany him and help him out.
A grateful smile crept up his lips, knowing that his big brother had sacrificed his sleep to be next to him.
"I don't remember sleeping here.." Seonghyeon murmured, stretching and yawning.
A notification then popped up on Martin's phone. He slid it up to see a video of him and Seonghyeon snoring like they were in some sort of competition for who can snore louder.
"Dude, James hyung was here last night?" A very confused Seonghyeon scratched his head in puzzlement.
Martin just laughed, and sent an angry cat sticker to the group chat that earned laughter from the members.
Deep inside, he felt grateful for his hyung who had stayed up with him the whole night.
5.
The day had finally arrived; James birthday.
No doubt, the younger lads have planned a lot for their big bro, including their own customized cake with James face on it.
They were all casually chilling in their dorms— much like typical Sunday nights.
Martin was folding his clothes neatly, Juhoon teasing the younger for being such a clean freak with a cup of warm coffee in his hand, Keonho laid sprawled on his twin's bed with his phone on full volume, and Seonghyeon, visibly annoyed, kicked the poor boy out of his comfort space.
"Yo, go to your bed dude"
"Iz comfy"
"What?"
"I said it's comfy"
"My bed?"
"No shit"
"I don't care, get out before I make you"
"Ooo shiver me timbers"
"Shut up- and please just- lower the volume for God's sake bro."
"My bad oh my-"
Before Keonho could finish his sentence, he had already been thrown off the bed and onto the cold, wooden floor.
"Ugh"
He pushed himself up, glaring straight into Seonghyeon's eyes.
"Gosh, y'all never stop bickering."
Martin spoke, breaking the fight between the two before it could get more violent.
He clicked his tounge in disappoinment, glanced at Juhoon with his cup of coffee, and all of a sudden, he's jolting out of his seat.
"You good bro?"
Seonghyeon, with his eyebrow raised, asked, wondering what the hell had gotten into him.
"James hyung- his surprise- oh my-"
And then he's scurrying around the dorm, hands all over the place, as if searching for something.
The other three eyed him like eagles, perplexed.
"What are u so worried about? He's not coming back anytime soon." Keonho murmured.
"Right. He just left not even an hour ago. What are you on." Seonghyeon questioned chuckling.
The tall boy finally calmed down and took a seat next to Seonghyeon, not looking any calmer.
"What? You guys, we don't even have a cake yet."
"Bro, our Manager's buying it later-"
"Later? When exactly?"
"Calm down."
"We gotta prepare early-"
"He just left, Martin."
"That's not the issue- did he even tell y'all where he was going?"
Silence.
"Uh no." Juhoon spoke, earning a "bruh" look by Martin.
"I mean, he's probably watching Avatar." Keonho muttered.
"Alone?"
Silence again.
"Guys.. he might be back anytime soon. We need to prepare early. There's no cake, no decorations, nothing."
"Technically, we do have the decorations."
"Yea, balloons-"
"Inflated ones?"
"Oh, uh, about that.."
Martin facepalms.
"Let's just, quickly set them up. I'll order the cake."
They then scatter around the dorm, blowing balloons, hanging colourful garlands, and doing basically everything they should have done the moment James left. But of course, they procrastinated.
Don't get them wrong— they love their hyung, but sometimes, Martin can be a little too paranoid.
"See Martin, he's not even back yet." Juhoon nudged Keonho, handing him the last balloon to be blown.
"Yea, and the cake's already done. Fully decorated by us."
Keonho added, before blowing and tying the balloon skillfully.
Martin sighs, scanning around the dorm.
"I just thought he might be back soon. I don't want to mess up on his birthday, ya know?"
He turned around, facing the others and leaning against the kitchen counter.
"I mean... James hyung deserves the best, and I want to show him that we are able to give him that. Especially after all those times he had proven his love for us."
He inhaled, fidgeting with the candles on the custom designed cake.
"I wanna make sure he knows how much we appreciate him on his special day, and on every other day. He's done so much for us, and I want to do the same."
Silence ensued, just the humming from the fridge enveloping the air between the four friends.
Then Seonghyeon approached Martin, patting his back with a gentle smile plastered on his face.
"I know. We feel the same way."
Martin sighed, glancing towards Seonghyeon and the other two. Seeing how genuine Martin was, Juhoon smirked.
"Why so sentimental all of a sudden."
Keonho scoffed, earning a glare from Martin.
Then the door opened, revealing the manager who was beaming from ear to ear holding a chocolate cake.
"Hey boys- oh." He stared at the cake on the counter.
"Oops.. looks like his birthday really is damn special."
--
Time passed.
The four boys waited patiently for their hyung, hiding in their respective spots: Keonho under the couch, Seonghyeon behind the curtains, Martin and Juhoon behind the kitchen counter.
Their manager had his phone ready discreetly, driving James home without the boy knowing about what's coming.
The dorm was the opposite of quiet, giggles echoing nonstop and conversations passed from one end of the room to the other. They couldn't contain their excitement, looking forward to the surprised look on James face.
"Do y'all think he'll cry?" Juhoon asked from across the room, to which Keonho answered confidently.
"No wayyyy."
"I bet he will" Juhoon continued.
"Nah, I bet 10,000 won he won't."
"Okay, bet."
"Bruh." Martin joined in, "why are y'all betting now-"
"GUYS!"
The whole room freezed.
"James- he's here!" Seonghyeon whisper-shouted, shutting off the others.
"Oh my-"
"Shut up Keonho."
Martin hastily turned off the lights and rushed back to his hiding spot.
Silence.
The door lock twisted.
Then two dark figures— James and their manager— appeared behind the door.
"Hello?"
Nothing.
James tilted his head in confusion, and turned on the lights.
"HAPPY BIRTHDAY JAMES HYUNG!"
The boys shrieked and sung in harmony, jumping out of their hiding spots, laughing at the way James almost stumbled from his two feet, startled.
He scanned the dorm that was now covered in decorations from the kitchen to the window, so unfamiliar to him unlike their usual, dull-looking dorm. Helium balloons encompassed the air, handmade banners hung up carefully against the windows, and confetti on the floor.
"Woah.." James whispered under his breath, turning his gaze to the members.
He couldn't hide the shy smile that formed on his lips as he realized how much they have prepared for him. Of course, he didn't expect much from them. He knew that it was possible for them to forget his birthday because of their tight schedule and busy life, which he wouldn't mind. But now there they are, cheekily grinning from ear to ear, wearing silly hats and holding a whole blanket with his face printed on it. 'How much cuter can these boys be?', James thought to himself with a slight smile.
"He likes it guys look he's smiling." Juhoon remarked, earning cheers from the others.
"We're the best bros ever." Keonho handshaked Martin victoriously.
"Quick, make your wish hyung, my hands are getting tired." Seonghyeon, the one and only cake holder, interrupted, holding a bizarre-looking biscoff cake in his hands.
"That cake has... a very questionable visual." James commented, scanning the cake with crictical eyes.
"What do you mean? It's beautiful" Seonghyeon smirked.
The cake did look extraordinary. A handrawn face was plastered smack on the centre (which James assumed it was him) and biscoff bits sprinkled haphazardly around the sides. He wouldn't have known it was biscoff flavored if not for the bits.
It was really colourful. Too much for the eye. Rainbow sprinkles covered the whole cake with neon green icing encompassing the top. And of course, a messy DIY 'happy birthday big bro' at the bottom.
He clasped his hands together and made a wish before blowing the candles. Applause and incoherent cheers ensued.
"This is edible, right?" James questioned Keonho, who was already holding a plastic knife and several plates.
"Don't worry hyung, there's another cake waiting for you in the fridge if you don't like this one."
"Wow I get two cakes this year? Thanks."
"Yes I bought it especially for you hyung."
"Bruh quit lying. The manager did." Martin stepped in and was immediately slapped by Keonho on the shoulder.
James just sighed, witnessing their endless bickering even on his birthday.
He cut the cake into even pieces professionally and handed them out to everyone else first. Then he began digging in. It still tasted incredible despite its odd visual, somehow.
Or maybe, just maybe, it was because of the efforts the boys had put in to decorate the cake. Or the festive atmosphere surrounding them— the smell of sweetness, the jokes and the laughs, the comfort James felt, their presence on a special day like this.
James wouldn't wish for anything more for his birthday, just this. The sense of familiarity, the warm feeling of home.
Maybe this is what his birthday was all about— being together.
If that's what it's like to grow old, then he gladly would. As long as they stay, joining him in his journey of life.
That's exactly what he wished for his 20th birthday;
to grow old with them, until the day he dies.
He glanced around, observing them, living the moment with his friends. Or rather his family. A label he prefers to call them.
A smile made its way on his face, unknowingly.
All this while it was him who had shown his unconditional love for them. It was him who was unafraid to express that feeling towards the boys. At the same time, he believed their love for their hyung was no less then his.
That day he was proven right.
After all the times he had been a loving hyung, this time, he was reminded of the fact that he too, had a loving family.
--
Midnight arrived and everyone had fallen into their deep sleep, except James. He noticed the folded letter lying on his nightstand. Curious, he opened it up and read it.
A tear escaped, wetting the paper beneath him.
~
Dear James hyung,
First of all, happy birthday!!!! just so you know, this was handwritten by none other than your youngest bro. Everyone else is here too, telling me what to write. Beware!!! This might be cringe!! (This was Martin hyung's idea btw)
On a serious note, we wanna say thank you for being the best big brother we could ever wish for. Thank you so muchh we really mean it. Because of you and your creative ideas, we could produce so many songs for our fans. Because of your dance skills and your coaching, we could improve on our own movements. Because of your jokes (although they might not be funny at times), we get to laugh and feel at ease. Because of your thoughtfulness, your efforts, your kind words and actions, we never had to struggle too much, and we never had to suffer alone. Without you, hyung, we wouldn't have been Cortis.
Hope you enjoyed your birthdayyy we can't wait to surprise you for your future birthdays. And also, juhoon says he loves being roommates with you. So yeah. You're amazing hyung. Jinjja for real man.
To many more birthdays with you!! Happy birthdayy! Don't stop being our hyung!!!!
Love you James hyung :) let's die together
Love,
your second family
~
That broke him. He pulled out a piece of sticky note and a pen from the drawer, being careful not to wake Juhoon up, and wrote.
Very quietly, he tiptoed to Keonho, Martin and Seonghyeon's room and tucked the note safely under the lamp on Keonho's nightstand. He then left, tears still refusing to dry, and went to sleep.
The next day, Keonho scratched his head and yawned upon waking from his sleep, before noticing the note on the nightstand.
He called the others and opened it up.
~
I read the letter. Thank you so much, I'm so thankful to have y'all in my life. I agree, let's die together.
Love,
James
~
End.