Chapter Text
The toon rooms had been quiet when ginger walked in.
Whether they have gone on a run or went out to some other floor for a meeting, it means not much to her.
She walked over to the worn down stove in the toon kitchen, turning on the oven with a hefty sigh. Ginger missed when she and Cosmo would bake here during Christmas season together.
When things were better.
Sprout and Bobette might have tagged along too, sometimes. Sprout would help Cosmo gather ingredients, Bobette would've gave her ideas for designs she could use on the goodies.
She missed it so much.
She missed how Cosmo and Sprout would get into their lighthearted bickering. She'd miss when Pebble and Coal would beg for snacks. Ginger could never resist Coal's begging eyes, those eyes that completely betrayed her usual unamused expression. She missed Rudie caroling so much that Cosmo would forget steps to baking sometimes, so he'd ban Rudie from the kitchen while the two baked. She missed Bobette's soothing words and gestures when Ginger felt what she was passionate about wasn't that satisfactory for others.
She missed those times.
She missed Bobette.
Her hands clenched the mixer as she mixes the cookie batter.
She can't even recall the last conversation she had with Bobette. As sentimental as it'd be for her, she really doesn't want to. She doesn't want to imagine what she could have said, would it have changed anything?
The cookie cutter felt cold and worn out in her hands. Do the shapes even matter anymore?
Bobette loved the Christmas tree shaped cookies. Ginger remembers well. She liked when Ginger would make more than one, and decorate different presents and ornament designs on the trees.
The heat could hardly phase her as she opened the oven, sliding the tray of cookies in.
She remembered Bobette saying she liked the Christmas trees mostly because of how she loves the green frosting. Ginger could never bring it to her that the color did not change the flavor.
She could recall Rudie being a little less fond of the taste than bobette. But oddly, he loved sticking around when she cooked, licking the frosting pipes so she had to change what she had in mind last minute. Rudie often always asked for reindeer cookies, all 9 from the classic tune. She'd done it once, and never again.
Part of her wished she had.
Her legs felt tired for standing from too long.
Does Rudie ever get tired? Always saying everything is jolly and fine. It's not. She can't keep lying to him, she'd just be lying to herself. Rudie knows better, why does he not act like it? If Rudie wasn't annoying then, he was definitely now.
The heat was more prominent as she took out the tray, making her wince.
Of course. She doesn't really mean that.
She couldn't.
Ginger knows Rudie more than he knows himself. She can't blame him. Everything for him came down, and he's just trying to make the best out of the worst possible situation. But part of it hurt. It hurt seeing Rudie hurt behind his festive facade. His prancing in joy was not the same. It looked like a nervous dog pacing.
His carols were not melodic or even annoying anymore.
It was like a more like a depressing self soothing affirmation. His loud singing was now just..
Dull..
His reckless dashing became more practice. It lacked the whimsy he used to have. It wasn't out of fun or festive energy anymore.
It was survival, and that's what hurt to see. It was no longer like how times were.
Everything they ever did was for survival.
Pretending only ever hurt.
She doesn't know how he does it. She wonders if he even knows himself. Maybe he does, and won't acknowledge it. Maybe he doesn't, maybe he doesn't want to know anymore.
She found it straining to move after she picked up the red icing pipe.
She can't forget the day her world 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 turned upside down.
Even after Gardenview shut down. When the kids stopped visiting, when the toon handlers and Delilah and Aurthur were gone. Everything somewhat ran quite normal.
Fine, even.
Even when some toons weren't themselves anymore.
Selfishly, so very selfishly
She was fine.
Of course, her heart went out for those who were gone. Those who had lost someone close. They were her friends too.
But she had her world still intact.
She had Coal, who would bring and deliver items for her. She had company that'd stay by her side without conversation or maybe even second thoughts.
She had Rudie. She could think times are still the same, even if it's not true, even if it hurts. It was something to help soothe her momentarily. She loved harmonizing with Rudie. She loved his endless Christmas stories, all she had heard before but felt nostalgic to hear again.
She had Bobette.
And she wouldn't complain.
She did her due diligence. She healed those who were hurt. She had Cosmo, who had his struggles. It felt nice to be family again, to have her little cousin come to her for problems before anyone else. It was different from the strain of being afraid of being separated when a near year came around the corner and those Christmas lights burnt out.
So in her eyes, it was fine.
Her hand shook as she iced the cookies. Ornament shapes. Red ornament shaped cookies.
She thought she was helping, really. She tried her best.
She knew Bobette was a hard worker. She loved that about her, but it gets concerning sometimes. This year something in her made the ichor in her body run uneasy.
Bobette was a lot more hellbent on Christmas being perfect this year. When ginger asked her why, she didn't quite get an answer that she felt was correct. Maybe it was so everytoon could forget everything? Maybe for a little?
She told herself that must be it. She wanted to be apart of it. She wanted Bobette to lay off herself a little.
What more could she have done? What should she have done? Did Bobette not trust her enough to tell her?
The red icing on the cookie looked clumpy, she had been icing the same one for a while.
She remembered the sound of glass crashing. Rudie thought Bobette dropped the box of ornaments. Ginger joked how Dyle wouldn't be too fond of trying to get replacements. Coal was the first to leave the room they were in.
The red icing had run out. What was she squeezing out anymore?
She remembered the sight too well. She can't forget it.
There was shattered red glass pieces everywhere. She could smell the ichor.
She did not hear the beeping from the oven.
The putrid smell of ichor. The sight of it leaking from red. Shards were sharp and scattered. She doesn't remembered what happened right after.
Her unoccupied hand found itself tapping on the counter. Nothing was even in the pipette anymore, but she still found herself squeezing it harder.
She remembered the sound of heavy footsteps. Her hand covered her mouth, she was trying her hardest not to cry, to scream for Bobette to cut it out, to make her body stop shaking and listen to her.
She could hear footsteps coming closer. Her breathing picked up, she couldn't move.
She remembered how Rudie looked at her from afar, behind a table, she thinks. How his hooves were frantically waving to and fro, beckoning to move. She couldn't.
She felt someone. Something. Some... Thing coming closer and closer. Footsteps grew louder. She could feel the presence behind her. She remembered closing her eyes, her hand clutching her mouth tight. Would it make a difference? The smell of ichor reeked. The footsteps felt belittling, how heavy and loud they were.
"Bwoof!"
Ginger flinched at the loud noise, her eyes immediately darting to the source. She blinked, in shock for a moment before letting out a breath she never knew she was holding.
"Oh, goodness Coal!" She exclaimed, her hand dropping the pipe and finding it's way to her chest. "I didn't know you were up here."
"Grr, bwoof!" The dog barked again, she did not look too pleased with Ginger.
Before Ginger could question it, suddenly a smell had hit her nose. She directed her attention towards the smell, noticing the stove she had foolishly left on.
"Oh jeez-" She grimmaced to herself, turning the stove off and wafting away the fumes. It's beyond her how a fire hadn't burst out yet. "I must have been so lost in thought I forgot to turn it off.. I'm sorry if that woke you up, thank you for keeping me in check."
Coal blinked back at Ginger, a short rumble leaving her.
"Mhm.. I'll be careful." Ginger responded back with a giggle. Her hand found itself petting Coal. "It's been getting so hard, Coal."
Coal stayed silent, watching ginger through unreadable eyes. Ginger could never really tell what ever went on behind those neutral expressions.
"I miss her so much, Coal... I can't stop thinking about her." Ginger admitted, her hand leaving Coal's head after she whined. "I know you do too.. I can't do this much longer."
For once, Coal's expression changed, her expression turning into a furrowed one.
"Coal, I have to see her. I'm going to go alone, I just have to see her again- I.. "
Ginger trailed off, she couldn't put her needs into words.
"I don't need anyone in the way.. They won't let me see her.. I feel like I could.. I think she just needs some help.."
There was a silence between the two, Ginger realizing what she had said, Coal unresponsive.
Coal had walked away, somewhere into the rooms.
Ginger watched her walk away, shame struck her. Who was she, to tell the one more arguably closest to Bobette that she 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥𝘦𝘥 to see her? Did Coal even understand? Did Coal detest her? Was she going to alert someone, who would ultimately stop her from her attempt?
She wouldn't allow it.
She grabbed her empty box of chocolate, loading the cookies in it. She was fine with Coal being upset. It hurt her, but she's doing what she needs to do. It's only fair for her. She'll be fine, shes sure.
After loading the box, she took it off the counter, brushing herself off from the flour.
Shes doing this, she can do it, she's sure.
As she enters the elevator, she can't help but start to think carrying a box for floors might be tedious.
She pressed the elevator button anyway.
Right as the elevator door shuts, somthing slides under the door last second. it was so fast, she was caught off guard.
"Bwoof!" Coal had barked at Ginger, panting from assumingly hauling ass to the elevator. Her little delivery gear was on, though sloppily.
Ginger stared at Coal for a moment, tears threatening to spill from her eye.
"Oh, Coal!" Ginger exclaimed, rushing over to the dog in an embrace as she blinked her tears away. "I thought you would be upset! You're really going to help me? You won't try to turn me away..?"
Coal barked again, her big tail wagging slowly behind her. Despite her neutral expression, she seems determined.
"Thank you Coal, thank you so much.. Youre such a good girl." Ginger praised, petting Coal on her head before backing up. She took a cookie out of the box, before placing the box in Coal's delivery gear.
"I know it won't be easy... But I promise I won't let anything hurt you." Ginger reassured, passing Coal the cookie, which Coal gladly ate up.
Ginger felt her mood lift a little. She wasn't alone. And now she's going to try to right her wrongs. The elevator's whirring into descent sparked a determination and vigor into Ginger.
She was really doing this.
She can't wait to see Bobette.