Chapter Text
Ilya remembers the night that Shane Hollander showed up to the group home so vividly, there was a severe thunderstorm warning, Troy was doing homework in one of the bedrooms with the door closed.
Hayden was in the kitchen getting help from Wiebe with his homework, Scott was at his part time job and then staying the night at Kip's apartment since he’d be aging out soon which he was excited about.
Ilya was in the living room watching the hockey game, Montreal voyagers vs. Boston raiders.
There was loud knocking at the door right as thunder shook the house.
Ilya pushed himself so he could see the front door, Wiebe opened it and Ilya saw a little scrawny kid with dark hair and dark eyes, he had a big black eye.
“Yes, you’re who I spoke with on the phone, I’m Wiebe.” Wiebe said, shaking the woman’s hand and offering her to come in out of the rain.
The boy followed, he was pale and looked tired, his shoulders tense.
“Here, Ilya can show you to your room.” Wiebe said softly.
Ilya quickly jumped over the back of the couch and that made the boy jump, his eyes widening, but he followed Ilya up the stairs anyway.
“I am Ilya, there is Troy, Hayden, and Scott but he is hardly ever around anymore since getting boyfriend, he will not be here for much longer.” Ilya explained.
Ilya walked to the only empty bedroom and opened the door, a single bed with a boring bed set and a boring desk that sat against the wall facing out of the window.
“How old are you?” Ilya asked, turning to look at the pale boy.
He definitely looked on the younger side but not much younger than Ilya who had just turned 13 this past year.
The kid did not answer.
After a minute of silence the kids' social worker came in and Ilya left, closing the door.
He made his way back downstairs and walked to the kitchen to grab a snack even though dinner would be done soon.
“Did you show Shane to his room?” Wiebe asked.
“Yes, very strange kid.” Ilya said, grabbing a pop tart out of the cupboard.
“Ilya.” Wiebe said.
“He would not talk.” Ilya said, throwing a piece of the snack into his mouth.
“I remember when you didn’t speak, those were nice.” Hayden said with a chuckle.
“Is different, I did not speak good English, he looks like he’d speak fine English.” Ilya explained glaring at Hayden.
“Boys that’s enough.” Wiebe said.
Ilya finished his pop tart and walked back to the living room and continued watching his hockey game.
——
And that was the first night that Shane had been away from the only home he had ever known.
Sure they weren’t always great and honestly mean most of the time, but they were his family after his mom and dad passed away when Shane was only a baby.
One of his teachers had reported him to CPS, he had a black eye, his grandpa just got mad at him, it was Shane’s fault for not hearing him yell for him.
His grandma tried her best.
Then when CPS showed up and saw the less than ideal living conditions they had made up their mind, Shane didn’t mind that the house was kept warm, he didn’t care about all the trash that littered the floor, he still had a path that led to his room and the bathroom.
He didn’t care that there was hardly any food in the house, he didn’t eat much anyway, but apparently there was a certain weight someone had to be to be considered healthy and Shane was well below that.
It was also frowned upon that he didn’t talk, he wasn’t forced into silence out of fear of what might happen to him at the house, he told himself that at least.
He remembers the nice lady sitting him down away from his grandparents and tried asking about the black eye, Shane didn’t provide any information.
It had been the only time he told himself that he was allowed to be scared of his grandpa.
It had been a long day, school was exhausting and all Shane had wanted to do was take a nap even if it was only a 15 minute one, Shane had never had an off day since living with his grandparents, he was always helping in some way.
He had gotten home and climbed into his bed, setting his alarm for 15 minutes and falling asleep, the blanket discarded on the ground somewhere.
He had woken up hours later to loud yelling in Japanese.
Shane quickly pushed himself out of bed tripping over his blanket, his door getting pushed open.
The angry yelling now directly over him.
“Speak boy!” His grandpa yelled, grabbing him by his shirt collar.
Shane couldn’t get the words to push through his lips, a lump stopping them.
The hit was hard and fast.
Shane fell to the ground and his grandpa just left him, it was Shane’s fault for wanting to take a nap anyway.
The nice lady led him away to a car outside, his book bag packed with a few items of clothing and stuff that he inherited from his parents.
His grandma standing at the door with tears in her eyes while his grandpa didn’t seem to care, Shane was glad that he wouldn’t be a burden on them anymore.
But he’d be lying if he said he wasn’t terrified of where he would end up.
He spent a few hours in an office, the lady offering Shane a bag of potato chips and a can ginger ale.
There were toys scattered around the office for kids much younger than Shane, he had just made it to 7th grade.
“Yes, it would help us immensely if you had room for him tonight.” The woman said.
Shane stared at the woman’s desk, family photos, a succulent that looked like it had seen better days, a lamp and then a plastic container with business cards.
“Thank you Wiebe, it really means a lot.” The woman said.
“Okay, we will be there shortly, thank you, bye.” She finished the phone call off and hung the phone up and smiled at Shane.
“We got you emergency placement with a good friend of mine, Brandon Wiebe, it’s at a group home so there will be other boys about your age and one in their late teens, how does that sound?” She asked warmly, trying to get Shane to talk.
Shane stayed silent moving his eyes to the carpet, her eyes were too heavy on him, it felt suffocating.
And just like that Shane was back in the car and they were driving again, his bag clutched tightly in his hands.
When they walked up to the door Shane wanted to be back with his grandparents, this house was much too big and loud and bright, it was more alive than Shane had felt his entire life.
The man that opened the door looked warm and inviting and it made Shane uncomfortable.
He was used to a permanent scowl and hushed whispers or angry incoherent yelling that he couldn’t understand.
“Thank you again, this is Shane, he’s a little shy.” The woman said putting her hands on his shoulders which made him automatically tense.
“Yes, you’re the one I spoke with on the phone-“ he started and then turned to Shane, “-I’m Wiebe.” He said.
Shane nodded and then was led inside.
“Here, Ilya can show you to your room.” Wiebe said and a second later a tall blonde haired boy jumped over the back of the couch.
It made Shane jump with the quick and loud movements, he felt his eyes widen just a bit but followed the boy up the stairs.
“I am Ilya, there is Troy, Hayden, and Scott but he is hardly ever around anymore since getting boyfriend, he will not be here for much longer.” Ilya explained.
They finally made it to a big empty room, much bigger than his room at his grandparents, it was much colder in the room as well.
“How old are you?” Ilya asked, staring at Shane, Shane felt his mouth dry, again the lump appearing in his throat and the words feeling heavy in his chest.
Shane was saved by the nice lady walking in, Ilya leaving immediately.
“Well I have to head back to the office now, here is my number in case you need anything, but Wiebe is very nice, all these boys are if you give them a chance.” She said, kneeling onto the ground.
Shane stayed silent.
“I already told him but I have an appointment scheduled with a child psychologist on Friday, to help figure some stuff out okay?” She said.
His grandpa didn’t believe in modern medicine but he only slightly nodded, he hadn’t been to an actual doctor in years, let alone a doctor for your head.
“I’ll see you real soon kiddo.” She said with a warm smile and then squeezed his shoulder before leaving the room.
Shane stayed standing there with his bag still resting against his back and staring at the hard wood floor.
Eventually he slowly moved to the bed and sat down, it was too soft, it felt new and nothing like the bed he had spent years sleeping on.
Shane wasn’t sure how long he had been sitting staring at nothing but he was brought back to the real world when the boy from before, Ilya, cleared his throat making Shane jump.
“Dinner is done, it is tacos.” He explained.
Shane nodded standing up, he followed the boy downstairs and into the kitchen, other boys that Shane hadn’t seen before sitting down, Shane grabbed an empty seat as far away as he could get.
2 plates of tacos were brought out and the table got loud.
Shane didn’t move to make his plate, instead he sunk down further into his seat, slipping his shirt sleeve into the corner of his mouth, chewing on it.
Nobody was paying attention, they were all hovering over the table, reaching for different things, different toppings, different sauces, different drinks, settling into their normal routine that Shane didn’t fit into.
Suddenly a taco was put down on his plate and he jumped looking up, his sleeve falling out of his mouth, it was a boy he hadn’t seen yet.
“Look at who decided to show up.” A different boy said.
The boy just smiled.
“Kip had to be up early for an art exhibit, I missed my bed.” The boy said.
He grabbed his own plate and filled it with his own tacos, putting another soft taco onto Shane’s plate, Ilya staring for a second but going back to digging into his own food.
Shane stared at the food on his plate.
“I’m Scott.” Scott said quietly, sitting across from Shane.
Shane stayed silent, his eyes moving to his lap, a hot blush rising from the base of his neck.
He eventually nibbled on the taco, mainly dumping the insides out and eating the soft taco shell.
He tried to ignore the eyes watching him.
That night he was sitting in his room, on the uncomfortable bed.
The door was closed.
He eventually pushed himself up and when the floor creaked he felt his heart start pounding, he froze, waiting for quick and loud footsteps stomping their way into his room for being up at this hour, for moving and making noise.
It never came though.
Shane quietly moved around the room trying to avoid the loud floorboards, he grabbed the thick blanket and pillow off the bed and made a makeshift bed on the floor.
As he was getting ready to lay down he heard soft knocking on the door, he felt his body tense, he quickly pushed himself up.
A second later the door was opened and the boy, Scott, from dinner peaked his head in.
“Wiebe asked me to check on you and make sure that you’re settling in okay.” He said softly, not walking fully into the room.
Shane felt his throat tighten, it was because he was loud, he had woken Scott up and now he was upset-
“I know it can be really scary, this is your first placement right?” Scott asked, leaning against the wall with his arms crossed loosely.
Shane slightly nodded, pulling his sleeves down to rest over his hands.
“Well this is a good first place, Ilya can be an asshole but he means well, I think it’s the accent that add most of the attitude-“ Scott started with a chuckle, “-Hayden is okay, kind of quiet but nice, Troy is a little wild sometimes but a good kid with a bright future.” Scott finished.
Shane nodded, staring down into the floor.
“Is there something wrong with the bed?” Scott asked after a few minutes of thick silence.
Shane quickly looked up at Scott, then at the stripped bed.
Shane shook his head no, crossing his arms tightly, he just wanted to be left alone, he wanted to lay in silence that made his ears ring and head pound.
“I’ll leave you alone, just wanted to check on you, goodnight.” Scott said.
Shane nodded and then he heard the door close.
He sat down onto the hardwood floor laying the blanket over his lap neatly.
Eventually his eyes got too heavy and he fell asleep sitting up leaning against the wall, his arms loosely crossed.
The next morning Wiebe peaked his head into the bedrooms, Ilya awake with headphones in reading a comic book, Hayden still passed out with a pillow over his head, Troy on the phone oblivious to the outside world, it made Wiebe happy seeing Troy out of his shell.
Then he looked into Scott’s room and saw him still sleeping as well.
And finally he looked into Shane’s room and Wiebe felt his heart strings tug, Shane was asleep right up against the wall in the floor, the blanket covering his lap and his arms so loosely crossed.
Wiebe thought about waking him up but he thought that maybe that would do more harm, he didn’t want to scare him anymore than he already was.
Wiebe closed the door softly and turned away.
“Is he sleeping on the floor?” Scott’s tired voice asked behind Wiebe.
“Yeah, sitting up against the wall.” Wiebe said.
Scott nodded.
“He was making it up last night, I asked if there was a problem with the bed but he said no.” Scott said, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.
“Said? Did he verbally say no?” Wiebe asked quickly.
“Oh no, just shook his head no, he doesn’t really talk.” Scott said.
“Yeah, his social worker has a psychiatrist appointment on Friday to help with that, apparently he’s been mute since his parents passed.” Wiebe explained.
Scott slowly nodded.
“He will come around eventually, he just has to get settled in.” Scott said.
Wiebe smiled and nodded patting Scott on the back.
Wiebe hoped that was true, Scott was lucky that after his parents left this was his first stop and he had never left, Wiebe liked to believe that he was able to create a safe and healthy environment for the boys that were kept under his roof, Shane didn’t have that for the first 12 years of his life so Wiebe knew that it would take a while until Shane felt safe enough to open up, if he ever decided to open up.