Chapter Text
Percy was absolutely dumbfounded, he’d never particularly cared what the gods think of me, or well of anything but this conversation had to be one of the most insane things he’d ever heard. And that was saying something. Especially since he once heard Gabe try and talk about running a business with his friends before.
“My children simply always come out far less inept than some of my family’s kids.” Athena’s voice rang out, "and some of it isn’t even related to my domain, I’m simply better at raising children.”
Percy would’ve thought that insane even if he didn’t know Annabeth, but he did, a smart, beautiful girl with a crushing fear of disappointing her mother and a large amount of fear she harbored of what might happen if she did. Percy couldn’t blame her. At least Poseidon hadn't let a monster attack him because he was embarrassed. Athena had let one into her temple though, for that exact reason when Annabeth was only twelve; for something Percy did no less. Percy hadn’t ever forgiven her.
He could hear Chiron’s muffled voice as well, seemingly agreeing with what Athena was saying although he seriously doubted that the centaur actually agreed with her. He probably just didn’t want to be smote down on the spot for ‘impudence’, as Poesidon had dubbed it, or whatever else she could come up with. It wasn’t like the gods were known for their great tempers. And well, neither was he. She wasn’t going to just keep standing there and flaunting her ego. Percy simply wasn’t going to allow it. And he knew exactly how to rectify that.
Getting down to the corner store had been easy, they had a small book section and Percy knew exactly which one he wanted. The cover was bright blue and yellow, impossible to miss with a stupid cartoon man on the cover. The title, in big letters read, “Raising Children for Dummies: A simple step by step guide for mediocre parents. He was so going to get smote for this, although for the look on Athena’s face… it might be worth it.
The cashier had given him a once over with an exasperated and fairly done expression but he let him check it out and shooed Percy out of the store, probably assuming that Percy was going to steal from him; which, absolutely not. Sally Jackson would sense something and find her way down here to lecture the underworld out of him if Percy even remotely considered stealing. Not his idea of a good time.
He’d had to dodge a fury on the way back to camp but that was the least of his worries at the moment as he made his way up to the devotional stand where people could leave offerings and he walked up to Athena’s fire, casting a quick glance around him for any onlookers before dropping the book in the fire and running to his cabin, sweat dripping down his spine.
What was he thinking? This was a terrible plan. Terrible, absolutely insane, no good, surefire way to an early grave. Too late now.
* * *
The book landed facedown with a thwap on the ground in front of where she was standing talking to Chiron. An offering? Now? It was an odd offering, she thought as she picked it up. Surprise quickly curdled into anger as she read the title.
“Raising Children for Dummies?” Her voice was measured, but no less furious as she looked up at Chiron, who had a hand over his mouth in both shock and horror. “Who would dare?” SHe asked but Chiron just shook his head.
“I haven’t a clue lady Athena, nothing of the sort has ever happened before.” He assured her
She bit out a laugh, cold and harsh as she flipped open to a random page. “Now that I believe, centaur, because as audacious as some of them are these children wouldn’t da-” She held up a hand as though Chiron had been the one talking and flipped to a different page, then another. Her eyes scanned the pages at a pace only a god could manage; Chiron wasn’t quite sure what she reading and he wasn’t entirely convinced he wanted to; he was going to ask but then she was gone, she simply dissipated in a burst of divine light that forced Chiron to look away, the only evidence that she’d ever been there was the small of old books and the sharp smell of battle. People, Chiron himself even, sometimes forgot she ruled war alongside her brother Ares, but there could be no doubt about it in the smell that had now begun to settle over the field he was standing in.
Why had he asked for this?
“Perceus Jackson” He bellowed out across the camp as he walked towards the cabin. He wasn’t one for yelling, he rarely did and felt that it never changed anything, but he also wasn’t stupid. Chiron had seen the boy make a bolt towards the cabins and away from the devotional altars. Why had he asked for this job? His nerves were going to be shot for a decade after this.
The boy peaked out of his cabin, his head darting around rapidly and Chiron noticed the young teens’s pale face first and forced himself to take a deep breath as he gestured for Percy to follow him and began heading down the path to the big house.
Percy caught up to him easily, hands shoved in his pockets and his eyes downcasted him.
“I’d ask if it was you, although I suspect your body language tells me everything that I need to know.” Chiron hadn’t been truly angry in a long time, the feeling was long foreign to him, but the way he ground out the words gave his feelings away easily; Percy looked up at him briefly. His ocean green eyes looked ever so slightly panicked before the boy once more found the ground very interesting. “So it was you? The book?
“Yes sir” If Chrion didn’t know better he would have said that Percy had flinched, but that wasn’t plausible. He’d never seen the young boy afraid of anything, let alone flinch.
“Why?” The door of the big house creaked open and Chiron walked in, Percy right on his heels, shutting the door softly behind him.
“What in Tartarus were you thinking! You could hav-” Chiron stopped the second he got a good look at Percy, who was standing with his back against the wall and… shaking. What was happening?
“Percy” he tried softly but Percy’s shoulders just curled inward. He didn’t get another chance to talk before the rambling started.
“I’m sorry I swear, I’ll fix it, I’m sorry just please don’t throw anything at me! I’ll fix it I just-”
Contrary to popular belief, centaurs could move very fast and Chiron had his arms around Percy’s shaking form moments later. “I’m not going to throw anything at you child, ever. Breathe, that is all you have to do right now.” He said softly
He felt Percy’s arms wrap around his neck and the child began to sob. “You’re safe, I swear it, it’ll be okay.” Percy nodded and Chiron made a mental note to contact either the boy’s mother or Poesidon to figure out what was wrong, but for now, there would be absolutely no more yelling coming from him.