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Alex Danvers’ name, over the years, has become synonymous with second place. (With less important. With less than.)
She was young when it happened. The gradual shift from being the beloved child to simply being the sister to a super power, beautiful alien. She didn’t blame Kara. She knew Kara has no control over it, because Kara was inherently better. There was no disputing it. (Cause how could she compete with a girl who could touch the stars?)
She noticed it too with her relationship with Clark. She would be the greatest family member Kara had, but the second Clark Kent came in with his dorky smile and chiseled face, Alex was kicked to the sidelines. But Alex didn’t blame Clark. He was better. He had superpowers. He shared actual blood with Kara. And so she let him take the spotlight, falling backstage herself, whenever he arrived on a whim, because Clark was better. (Even if he left Kara… Even if it was Alex who stayed…)
Even in her career, Alex was once the feared, DEO agent. She kicked ass, did science, and blew everyone away with either brains or brawn, but suddenly she was being partnered with aliens - Supergirl and J’onn Jones. They had powers. They had abilities. They used them while fighting and everyone was in awe of them rather than her. “Supergirl just shot that guy with her laser eyes!” “Did you see the Director? He flew so quick!” Alex would listen to her coworkers rave in the locker rooms about her friends. But that was alright. They were just better. They had super powers, better fighting skills and advantages… Alex just had her gun and her wits, and often felt like most of the time she spent getting her ass kicked by aliens just for Supergirl to swoop in last minute and save her. It was alright they got the praise, because Kara and J’onn were just better agents, better fighters, better people… They deserved it - all the recognition. (Alex didn’t. She’s human. She’s weak.)
But then she met Maggie and for a minute, Alex allowed herself to believe that maybe for someone - just maybe - she came first. But then a “babe” with blonde hair, legs for days, and a beautiful complexion kisses Maggie and Alex is thrown the silver medal and clutches dearly onto promises of “next time” that she figures will never come into fruition. (Not that matters at all to her… Not like she keeps up at night thinking of that blonde and ways to end her… Not that she dreams of night replacing herself with that blonde, feeling her lips touch Maggie’s, feeling the warmth of her hand back in her own once more, intertwined fingers and hearts beating as one…)
So maybe that’s why she’s about to do this... This horribly stupid, Kara-is-going-to-kick-her-ass-if-she-actually-goes-through-with-this thing….. Because maybe if her name is Alex “Second Place” Danvers then maybe - just maybe - no one will care if she gets hurt, because at least the “First Place” people will be around. So maybe - just maybe - Alex “Second Place” Danvers is expendable. So maybe - just maybe - she’s doing this to protect the “First Place” people, because they’re more important. (Because she’s less than. She’s less than, and she’s okay with that. She tells herself she’s okay with that so many times; it’s her mantra.)
She goes through her list, defending the reason why she’s going to storm into this warehouse without backup.
One) There was kryptonite inside. Kryptonite would hurt Kara. She couldn’t let that happen. She’d have to neutralize the threat without having her sister around to get injured.
Two) Maggie was on a date with that leggy blonde “babe”. She was busy. No point bothering her.
Three) She couldn’t put her men in danger without knowing what exactly was in the warehouse. Going on in to figure it out before her team would be the mark of a good leader? Right? She was doing it to minimize the fatality and injury rate.
She nodded. Good reasons, good reasons. (She always had a reason. An excuse, more like, to throw herself into harm's way. No point though dwelling on that now…)
She pulled her guns out and charged in - a woman on a mission. The alien was, for good reason, taken by surprise. He was tall - much taller than Alex - with green reptilian skin and sharp spikes shooting out of his bones. Yet it appeared he was stronger than she had initially anticipated as bullet after bullet slammed into his chest with little to no effect on him, because, unfortunately, like most aliens, the metal ricocheted off his impenetrable skin.
“You will regret this!” he cried out despite the fact the bullets were perhaps like flies to him.
Alex was already regretting this, but the concept really settled in when a wave of spikes were tossed in her direction. She ducked - reacting the way she was taught - and took cover, but she was too slow. Her left arm was suddenly impaled by a shard of alien bone. Pain overwhelmed her, but she pursed. She cursed and eyed it carefully, but it was lodged in her flesh. Pulling it out now would only increase the bleeding and she was already losing a lot of blood. She cursed again. She would need to move or risk getting another spike in her arm. She took a deep breath before moving her arm. The instant she did she let out a cry of pain as she crawled, with all her strength, to a better cover. This was not going well. She was supposed to be in and out. Why did she think she could take an alien by herself?
She looked at her wound again. Dark ooze was spilling from it alongside her blood.
“Shit,” she gasped. “You’re poisonous!” Now, she was definitely glad, she didn’t let Maggie in on her little operation. Had Maggie taken a poison spike… She didn’t even want to think about that. She grabbed her walkie.
“This is Agent Danvers. All units, listen up, the target is poisonous and - “
“Alex,” A very concerned voice said in her ear piece. “Alex, how the heck do you know this?”
She gulped audibly. “Because I’m at the warehouse…” She waited a moment, awaiting a snappish response, an argument, but nothing came. “Wait! Supergirl! You can’t come! He has the shipment of kryptonite! You’ll be as weak as me!”
“She’s already gone, Alex,” Winn responded meekly. “Sorry. Man, you two are really, really stubborn. As anyone every told you that?”
She wanted to respond “our mother”, but spikes are flying over her head and the heavy footsteps are coming closer. She swallowed thickly. Dark veins have already wrapped around her left bicep. The limb was already becoming numb. (She didn’t even want to think about what that meant. Amputation?)
She fired her weapon at the alien despite its little effect, hoping to slow it down as he draws closer and closer. It’s almost as if he’s taunting her. His movements are slow and his smile grows more and more malicious with the minutes.
Alex braced herself for death - for a spike to slam into her chest, for the dark veins to get too close to her heart, infecting her whole bloodstream - but suddenly a girl in red and blue was in front of her. She was safe. The warmth that envelops her was comforting. And now there was no point in staying awake, because Kara is there and Kara is fighting. Besides, she was too tired to stay awake any longer. Her eyelids grew heavy. She was lying in a pool of blood and dark ooze.
She passed out before Kara could even say her name.
---
There are people talking, but Alex was too weak to even open her eyes. She wondered if she was dreaming, if she fabricated their voices to keep her company. She wondered if she was dead and the darkness was now to be her’s for eternity.
“I’m worried about her,”
“She has been distant and cold recently…”
“I noticed,” It was a young woman’s voice. Normally, chipper, but now tainted by worry and concern. “I ask her at sister’s night, but she refused to speak. We were in the middle of our Gilmore Girl rewatch,”
“Hm,” The other voice is deeper, hardened with a fatherly concern. “I assumed her distance was because of Veronica Sinclair’s lack of charges…”
“I should call Eliza,”
“Yes,”
“...I don’t know what I’m going to say,” The young woman’s voice broke. “Your daughter embarked on a suicide mission and nearly got herself killed in order to protect me,”
There was silence for a few moments. “Maybe,” the man said cautiously. “Maybe, just start with ‘Hi mom’,”
“Okay,” the woman said. Her breathing was evening out. She was calming down. “Okay. I can do that,”
“I’ll call Detective Sawyer. It appears she’s been trying to get in contact with Alex all night,”
“Maggie is Alex’s new friend,”
“Well, she obviously cares for Alex. She called nineteen times tonight,”
There was silence again. “I better call Eliza,”
“I’ll call Detective Sawyer then. “And Kara?”
“Yeah?”
“Take the night off. Be with your sister,”
“Thanks, J’onn. Thanks for everything,”
“She’ll need you when she wakes up,”
---
Alex awoke to her sister at her side scribbling something down on paper. It’s for work, no doubt. She’s almost so invested in whatever she’s writing, she almost doesn’t notice the way Alex’s eyes flutter, but thanks to those alien genetics, she does.
“Alex!”
“Kara,” she croaked. “Good to see you,”
“Good to see you too,” Kara pushed some strands of hair out of her sister’s eyes. “What you did today was really stupid,”
“I’m sorry,”
“No you aren’t,” Kara sighed. “You’re doing that thing where you say what I want you to say,”
“And you’re pouting,” Kara is scary good at it. Alex can feel her will to resist chipping away.
“You don’t have super powers, Alex. You don’t… You aren’t me. You can’t afford to keep doing this. The strain you're putting on your - “
“Weak, human body?” Alex spat. “Yeah, yeah…” She didn’t mean to say it like that, but she’s tired and angry and hurt…
Kara’s eyes softened. “Alex…” But whatever she’s about to say is cut off by a very pissed off Maggie Sawyer who stormed into the room.
“What the actual Hell, Danvers? I can’t go to a nice restaurant and drink a nice beer without hearing you got yourself shot,”
Alex had a comeback, but she sort of lost the ability to speak the moment Sawyer walked in. (Kara noticed. Her blue eyes widened with a mixture of shock and amusement.)
“Whatever this is,” Maggie motioned to everything. “Needs to stop. You can’t just ditch me on a case we’re working on and go fight the bad guy by yourself. It doesn’t work like that. We’re partners. Okay? If you’re doing dangerous shit, I’m doing it with you,” She stopped her rant to look at Supergirl questioningly. “And if we’re doing dangerous shit, we’re calling the superhero for backup,”
Supergirl nodded in support.
“We’re a team. You got your DEO, you got your Superhero girlfriend - “ Alex attempted to object, but Maggie is clearly on a roll and doesn’t stop. “- and you got me. Okay? You call us. When you want to do something heroically stupid, you call us. And if everyone says no, you call me. I go where you go, because there is no way in Hell I’m letting you get hurt again,”
“I like her,” Kara mumbled to herself.
“I didn’t know you cared, Sawyer,” Alex managed to say.
“Because you never asked, Danvers,”
Kara’s blue eyes widened once more before she took a step out of the room to give the two privacy - Alex gave her sister a grateful look.
The moment Supergirl is out of the room, Maggie’s gaze softened.
“She’s not my girlfriend, you know,” Alex started. “She’s just a friend. My best friend, actually,”
There was a deep silence. A deep soul-gazing silence that made Alex feel strangely vulnerable.
“Why’d you do it, Danvers? Go into the warehouse without waiting for backup? You have a death wish or something?”
Alex wanted to lie, but there’s something about Maggie that pulls the truth from her grasp. “I didn’t think it was important if I got hurt. You and Supergirl are more important,”
“Alex, you are important too. You might not be some alien super model in a cape, but you are important. Just like she is important. And just like I am important,” Maggie pulled a chair so she could be closer to the agent. “And you know what? I choose you,”
“Sorry?”
“The blonde? We broke up at dinner. Don’t worry. You weren’t the only cause. We just… We never clicked. And we were never serious,” Maggie stopped her rambling and looked deep into Danvers’ eyes. “I choose you,”
“You choose me?” Alex repeated in disbelief.
The detective nodded. “I choose you, because you’re important to me,”
Alex looked into the other woman’s eyes for a sign that she was lying. She had to be. Alex knew she was important to people, but hearing Maggie say it…. She steadied herself and looked back into those brown eyes. “You’re important to me too,” she murmured. And she meant it.
“So we’re in agreement, right? No stupid stunts unless we do it together?” Maggie grinned.
Alex leaned forward and kissed her - passionately. “Agreed,”
“ALEXANDRA DANVERS!”
Alex froze. She knew that voice well.
She turned to the left to find a very unamused Eliza.
“What on Earth is this I hear about a suicide mission, Alexandra? Hm?”
Alex turned to Maggie for assistance, but found her new girlfriend already escaping. The detective knew better than to pick a fight with an angry mother.
“Hi, mom. It’s good to see - “
Eliza doesn’t bother with the pleasantries. “How dare you think your life is unimportant? You are my Supergirl! I do not know what I’d do without you and - “
Alex’s brown eyes found themselves glued to her sister and Maggie standing side-by-side giving her tiny waves and looks of encouragement.
She supposed she deserved this. She never should have risked her life like that, because Alex Danvers wasn’t expendable. Even if her name was, in fact, Alex “Second Place” Danvers, because no matter what, she was important, because she was a “First Place” person to the people who loved her. And that’s what mattered.