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The Prefect Council Room had been repaired. Technically.
The giant hole Mash had created in the wall was now covered by several enormous stone slabs fused together unevenly. The repaired section bulged outward slightly like the building itself had given up emotionally.
Rayne stared at it in silence. Then he looked down at the new meeting agenda. At the top, written in perfect handwriting: IMPORTANT: NO PROPERTY DAMAGE TODAY!
Rayne inhaled slowly. The doors exploded open.
“GOOD EVENING, MY FELLOW PRISONERS OF ADMINISTRATION!”
Margarette entered while standing atop the floating piano again.
Rayne did not even look up this time. “You are banned from dramatic entrances.”
Margarette played a single key.
Ding.
“Then this is a subtle entrance.”
Abel was already seated with his tea. “Your definition of subtlety remains incorrect.”
Margarette sat sideways on the piano bench. “And yet infinitely more entertaining than yours.”
Abel adjusted his sleeve calmly. “Entertainment is temporary. Silence is eternal.”
Margarette pointed dramatically. “You see? That’s exactly the sort of sentence villains say before being defeated by friendship.”
Abel sipped tea. “Friendship sounds exhausting.”
Rayne stood at the head of the table. “Today’s meeting concerns academy safety reforms.”
Margarette immediately booed.
Abel nodded approvingly. “An appropriate topic after the Rabbit King Incident.”
Rayne’s eye twitched slightly. “We are not calling it that.”
Margarette leaned forward. “History already has.”
Rayne ignored them. “Due to recent events, Headmaster Wahlberg has requested stricter regulations regarding student behavior.”
Margarette gasped theatrically. “You mean restrictions upon artistic expression.”
Rayne looked at the paper. “It specifically says students are no longer permitted to summon explosive orchestras indoors.”
Margarette looked offended. “Then the academy opposes culture.”
Abel quietly added: “The academy opposes debris.”
Rayne continued reading. “Students are also prohibited from weaponizing wildlife.”
All three slowly looked at the rabbits sitting in the corner. There were somehow more rabbits than before.
Margarette whispered: “They’ve unionized.”
Rayne ignored this with visible effort. “Finally,” he said, “students may no longer alter academy architecture without authorization.”
At that exact moment…
CRASH.
Everyone turned. Mash Burnedead was standing halfway through the ceiling. There was a long pause.
Mash blinked downward from the massive hole above. “Wrong room.”
Rayne closed his eyes.
Margarette stood dramatically atop the piano bench. “THE PROPHECY RETURNS.”
Abel calmly took another sip of tea. “He appears to navigate exclusively through infrastructure.”
Mash casually dropped from the ceiling.
BOOM.
The floor cracked slightly on impact. Rayne looked down at the new crack. Then at Mash. Then back at the crack.
Mash dusted himself off. “The stairs were crowded.”
Margarette clutched their chest. “His mind transcends architecture itself.”
One rabbit immediately hopped onto Mash’s shoe. Mash nodded politely at it.
Rayne pointed directly at Mash. “No feeding the rabbits.”
Mash paused. “You sensed my cream puff?”
Rayne narrowed his eyes. “You are carrying them again.”
Mash silently pulled six cream puffs from his pocket.
Margarette whispered reverently: “A magician never reveals their secrets.”
Abel looked at Mash thoughtfully. “You conceal pastries more efficiently than most people conceal weapons.”
Mash nodded once. “Cream puffs are important.”
Rayne pinched the bridge of his nose. “Why are you here?”
Mash answered immediately. “Finn said there were snacks at council meetings.”
Rayne slowly turned toward the door. Finn was standing there frozen in terror. Rayne stared.
Finn panicked instantly. “IT WAS AN ACCIDENT.”
Margarette burst into delighted laughter. “Ah! The younger Ames enters the stage!”
Finn looked around the room: the cracked floor, the ceiling hole, the rabbits, Mash holding pastries, Margarette standing on a piano, Abel somehow still drinking tea peacefully.
Finn looked exhausted already.
Rayne spoke very quietly. “Finn.”
Finn stood straight immediately. “YES BROTHER.”
“Why did you tell Mash there would be snacks?”
Finn sweated nervously. “I thought he wouldn’t actually come.”
Mash nodded. “I came.”
Abel murmured: “An error in judgment.”
Margarette pointed dramatically at Mash. “No. Fate guided him here.”
Mash raised a hand slightly. “I got lost first.”
Margarette nodded solemnly. “Fate with detours.”
Rayne took a deep breath. “Fine. Sit down quietly and do not destroy anything.”
Mash sat immediately. The chair exploded beneath him.
CRACK.
Mash fell directly to the floor still holding the cream puffs perfectly upright. Silence filled the room.
Abel looked at the broken chair. “Remarkable.”
Margarette wiped away an imaginary tear. “The furniture sacrificed itself for art.”
Finn looked like he wanted to disappear from existence. Rayne stared at the ceiling for several seconds as though reconsidering all his life choices.
Then…
Knock-knock.
Everyone froze. Someone had actually used the door normally.
Rayne straightened slightly. “Enter.”
The door opened. Lance walked in.
He stopped immediately upon seeing: Mash sitting on chair debris, rabbits everywhere, a hole in the ceiling, Margarette on a floating piano, Abel calmly drinking tea beside destruction.
Lance slowly closed the door again.
Rayne spoke instantly. “Do not leave.”
Lance reopened the door reluctantly. “I sensed chaos.”
Margarette spread their arms proudly. “And chaos sensed you.”
Lance pointed at Mash. “Why is he here?”
Mash answered first. “Snacks.”
Lance nodded once. “That makes sense.”
Rayne looked genuinely tired now. “Can we please complete one meeting without structural collapse?”
Everyone considered this.
Then a rabbit climbed onto Abel’s head. Abel froze. The rabbit sat there proudly like a tiny king claiming territory.
Margarette gasped loudly. “THE PUPPET TYRANT HAS BEEN CHOSEN.”
Abel spoke without moving. “Remove it.” The rabbit began chewing his hair. “Remove it immediately.”
Mash stood up. The floor cracked again. Mash gently picked up the rabbit and handed it to Rayne. The rabbit immediately fell asleep in Rayne’s arms.
Margarette pointed dramatically. “HE HAS ACCEPTED HIS FATHER.”
Rayne’s expression somehow became even more emotionless.
Finn whispered quietly to Lance: “How is this worse than last time?”
Lance stared at the ceiling hole. “I don’t think this room survives a third meeting.”
Suddenly…
BWOOOM.
An explosion echoed somewhere outside. Everyone paused. A student screamed in the distance.
Abel calmly looked out the window. “The east wing is on fire.”
Margarette tilted their head thoughtfully. “Again?”
Rayne slowly set the sleeping rabbit down. Then he picked up the meeting agenda. He stared at the title: NO PROPERTY DAMAGE TODAY! Then he tore the paper in half.
Mash raised a hand. “Does this mean the meeting is over?”
Rayne stood up. “Yes.”
Margarette leapt onto the piano triumphantly. “FREEDOM ONCE MORE!”
Abel finished his tea in one final sip. “I accomplished even less than last time.”
Finn whispered: “I want to transfer schools.”
Lance nodded. “Reasonable.”
Rayne walked toward the door while rabbits followed him again like devoted fluffy soldiers. Behind him, Margarette began playing dramatic music, Mash ate another cream puff, Abel watched the burning east wing in silence. And somewhere in the academy, something exploded a second time.
Rayne did not turn around. “I’m submitting my resignation.”
Rayne did not submit his resignation. He tried. Unfortunately, Headmaster Wahlberg laughed for three straight minutes and handed the paperwork back. So three days later, the Prefect Council met again. Against everyone’s better judgment.
The repaired council room now contained: reinforced walls, reinforced ceiling, reinforced floor, emergency barrier spells, three fire extinguishers, and a large sign reading: ABSOLUTELY NO MASH BURNEDEAD!
Rayne stared at the sign. Then at Mash Burnedead sitting inside the room already.
Mash looked up from his cream puff. “The door was open.”
Rayne silently folded the sign in half.
Margarette floated in through the window this time while playing violin music dramatically. “Ah… I see destiny has gathered once more.”
Rayne looked at the shattered glass behind them. “Why the window?”
Margarette spun elegantly. “Doors are symbols of limitation.”
Abel entered normally through the actual door. He observed: the broken window, Mash eating pastries, Margarette posing with a violin, Rayne already exhausted.
Abel nodded once. “We’ve started early today.”
Rayne sat down heavily. “This meeting will be brief.”
Mash raised his hand immediately. “Can there be snacks first?”
Rayne pointed at the cream puffs. “You brought your own snacks.”
Mash considered this. “Additional snacks.”
Margarette placed a hand over their heart. “Such ambition.”
Abel calmly unfolded a newspaper. “The cafeteria reported a cream puff shortage this morning.”
Mash looked away suspiciously.
Rayne opened the meeting agenda. “First topic: unauthorized student duels.”
Margarette gasped. “A timeless art form!”
Rayne continued. “Students may not challenge each other to combat over cafeteria seating.”
Abel looked mildly thoughtful. “What if the seat has sentimental value?”
Rayne stared.
Abel sipped tea. “I’m exploring the boundaries.”
Rayne flipped pages. “Second topic: magical creature containment.”
At that exact moment...
RIP.
Everyone looked down. One of Rayne’s rabbits had somehow eaten the corner of the agenda again. Rayne gently picked it up. The terrifying Divine Visionary held the tiny rabbit with absolute care.
Mash watched this closely. “You like rabbits a lot.”
Rayne answered immediately. “Yes.”
“More than people?”
Rayne slowly looked around the room. Margarette was balancing upside down on the floating piano. Abel was teaching a rabbit how to hold a teacup using puppet strings. Mash was feeding another rabbit tiny pieces of cream puff beneath the table.
Rayne looked back at Mash. “Yes.”
Margarette pointed dramatically while still upside down. “A confession from the ice king himself!”
Abel nodded calmly. “Reasonable conclusion.”
Suddenly the council room doors burst open. Dot stormed inside. “MASH!”
Mash blinked. “Hello.”
Dot pointed furiously. “YOU STOLE MY LUNCH!”
Mash shook his head. “I borrowed it permanently.”
Dot exploded instantly. “THAT’S CALLED STEALING!”
Margarette gasped excitedly. “Ah! Passion enters the theater!”
Rayne stood immediately. “No fighting inside the council room.”
Dot pointed at Mash. “HE ATE MY LIMITED EDITION STRAWBERRY CREAM PUFF!”
Mash paused. “That was yours?”
Dot looked ready to combust. “YES!”
Mash thought for a moment. “It was pretty good.”
Dot screamed incoherently. Magic exploded around him. The reinforced walls trembled.
Rayne immediately drew his wand. “Everyone remain calm.”
Margarette slammed a dramatic violin chord. “NO. LET THE EMOTIONS SING.”
Abel calmly moved his tea farther from the explosion radius. Dot lunged toward Mash. Mash sidestepped casually. Dot flew directly into the reinforced wall.
BOOM.
The wall cracked anyway. Everyone stared at the crack.
Rayne looked emotionally defeated. “Those walls were expensive.”
Mash nodded sympathetically. “Walls are fragile.”
Rayne looked like he aged five years instantly. Then something impossible happened.
The rabbit in Rayne’s arms hopped down onto the table and walked directly toward Dot.
Dot sniffed dramatically. “A rabbit?”
The rabbit placed one tiny paw on Dot’s hand. Dot’s rage vanished instantly. “Soft.”
The room froze.
Dot carefully picked up the rabbit. His entire personality changed. “Tiny.”
Margarette whispered dramatically: “The beast has been tamed.”
Abel adjusted his coat thoughtfully. “Remarkable. The rabbit neutralized him faster than combat magic.”
Dot held the rabbit gently. “Its ears are warm.”
Mash nodded seriously. “Rabbits are strong.”
Rayne quietly took a sip of tea for the first time all meeting. Peace. Actual peace. No explosions. No destruction. Just silence.
Then…
CRASH.
Everyone slowly turned. The reinforced ceiling collapsed inward. A body fell through the rubble.
Lemon stood up from the debris covered in dust. She looked around cheerfully. “Oh good! I found Mash!”
Rayne looked at the destroyed ceiling. Then at Mash. Then at Lemon. Then back at the ceiling.
Margarette whispered with awe: “The universe itself rejects architecture.”
Abel looked upward through the new hole. “At least the sky is visible now.”
Lemon walked over happily carrying a basket. “I brought homemade cream puffs for everyone!”
Mash’s eyes widened. The rabbits immediately charged toward the basket. Dot still held his rabbit protectively.
Margarette leapt dramatically onto the table. “A FEAST OF DESTINY!”
Rayne stood motionless. Completely motionless. Too motionless.
Finn quietly peeked through the doorway. “B-Brother?”
Rayne slowly turned toward him. Finn immediately regretted existing.
Rayne spoke in the calm voice of a man moments away from spiritual collapse. “Finn.”
“Yes?”
“Cancel all future prefect meetings.”
Everyone froze.
Margarette gasped theatrically. “You cannot silence destiny!”
Rayne pointed at the ceiling crater. “Destiny can submit written reports.”
Abel nodded calmly. “A wise policy.”
Mash raised a hand. “Can we still have snacks?”
Rayne stared at him for a very long time. Then one of the rabbits climbed onto Mash’s head again. Mash didn’t react. The rabbit loafed comfortably in his hair.
Rayne sighed. “Fine.”
Margarette slammed the violin triumphantly. “THE GOLDEN AGE OF ADMINISTRATIVE FAILURE CONTINUES!”
Outside the academy, something exploded again. Nobody even reacted this time.