Work Text:
florida 2017
They were sat on the beach. Ilya looked behind him to make sure no one was looking before he moved his hand closer to touch Shane’s. They had just discussed that Shane and his girlfriend, well, ex girlfriend, were incompatible and have broken up. Ilya wants to ask him for his room number, but knows he can’t. Not tonight anyway, his father is waiting for him back at the hotel.
Ilya had an important meeting his father insisted on coming to. Ilya didn’t want him to. He pleaded for him to stay in russia. It didn’t work. He insisted.
Predictably, Shane asked.
“What’s your room number?”
Ilya moved his hand, causing Shane to jerk his head.
“Not tonight. My father is here, at the hotel”.
“Oh. Okay”.
Ilya stood up,
“I am sorry. I want to, it’s just- He leaves on Tuesday.” He said looking down on Shane.
“Okay, Tuesday then.“ Shane offered a weak smile. He doesnt know much about Ilya and his father’s relationship, but Ilya hardly mentions him, which tells him enough.
Ilya sighed, and headed back to the hotel.
Later that night, Ilya had gotten in to an argument with his father. His dementia is getting worse. Ilya had to break the news to him that his wife, Ilyas mother, is dead. For the third time. Every other time, his father would yell at him. Tell him it’s his fault. On and on. It was never easy for Ilya to hear him speak like this. He would suck it up and apologize. But this time it wasn’t just yelling. He got angry. Violent. Ilyas father had only hit him a handful of times. He usually stuck to degrading him. But tonight,Ilya stormed out the room, with a blooming bruised cheek where his father had thrown a glass cup at him.
He headed to his room. Leaving his father alone. He was in the elevator when he reached to touch his face, it stung, and it felt wet. He looked at his fingers and saw the blood. The glass must’ve cut him.
He headed straight to the bathroom and looked in the mirror. His eyes were stinging as well as his cheek. He washed his face and dried it on the towel. He stared back at his reflection in the mirror until he broke away and pulled his phone out.
Lily
What’s your room number?
It didn’t take long for Shane to reply.
Jane
I thought you can’t tonight?
Lily
I change my mind.
Jane
1246
Ilya was already out the door by the time Shane had sent his room number, and within 3 minutes, he was knocking on Shane’s door.
Shane opened the door with a smile, that quickly dropped when he saw Ilyas face. He rushed in and Shane closed the door.
“Rozanov? What happened-“
He was cut off by Ilya shoving his mouth on to his. “No talking.” He said once pulling back.
For a moment, Shane didn’t care. He was happy to do no talking. To stay kissing like this. But he decided to push Ilya off, lightly.
He got a better look of his face. He had a large blooming bruise on the left of his face with a long slash across it. The wound is fresh. So fresh the blood isn’t even dry. As well as that, his eyes were glistening.
He looked annoyed at the lack of kissing going on. He leaned back in but Shane put a hand up to his chest. “Are you okay?”
“I am fine. Do not make this a big deal.”
Shane rolled his eyes and gave in. He kissed him and Ilya moved the two of them over to the bed, But shane couldn’t shake the feeling that he was not fine. He pulled back again and Ilya tutted and rolled his eyes. “Rozanov, i-“
He was cut off by Ilya standing up abruptly.
“Whatever. I will see you tomorrow at the game.” He mumbled and began to walk to the door, but Shane chased after him. “Ilya, come back.”
The first name. He hesitated by the door.
“Please” Shane begged
He held his head down and turned around. He threw his hands up, as if he were trying to prove something.
“Can we just… talk?”
“Ok? Talk?”
“Just- sit down, Rozanov.”
He didn’t want to. He came here because he needed a distraction. To fuck. But i guess a part of him did want to, because he was sitting on the chair opposite the bed, where Shane was sitting.
“It’s not just me, right?” Shane started.
“Not just you, what?” Ilya replied, frustrated.
“You feel it too, don’t you?”
“Feel what?”
“Well, the last time we were together.. it was.. different.”
“What? You running away?” Ilya just wanted to leave, or fuck him.
“Look, i’m- i’m sorry i freaked out. Okay?”
“Freaked out over nothing.”
“It wasn’t nothing! Don’t act like that. This is hard enough without you being an asshole!”
Ilya knows he’s being an asshole. He doubles down. He moves over to the bed, sitting next to Shane.
“What do you want Hollander?” Ilya asked.
Shane looked up and Ilya. Ilya was avoiding eye contact.
“I just- i care about you.“
“You don’t care about me.” Ilya mumbled.
“Yes. I do. A little too much, it scares me.”
Shane rested his hands on the side of Ilyas face, turning it to face him. Ilya closed his eyes, at his best attempt of avoiding Shane’s puppy dog eyes. He leaned in to his touch.
“What happened to your face?” Shane asked gently. Ilya felt his eyes well up. He sighed and opened them. But he didn’t answer, so Shane kissed him. When he pulled back, Ilya had a tear running down his cheek. Shane wiped it, careful of his cheek. “You don’t have to talk about it, just- let me clean it up? It looks painful. I wanna help.”
Ilya smiled at his eagerness to help. He nodded. “Okay.”
Shane stood, he grabbed a towel and wet it and brought it back to Ilya, who was now laying on the bed. Legs dangling off of it. His eyes were closed and he was holding the bridge of his nose like he had a headache, which makes sense.
“Do you have a headache?”
Ilya nodded and sat up.
“Is fine though, it will pass.”
Shane helped him clean the cut. Ilya winced a little, trying not to. Shane was gentle, and kept apologizing. After cleaning it, he got up and grabbed a bandaid from his mini first aid kit in his suitcase. Ilya rolled his eyes amused by how prepared he is.
After Shane gently applied the bandaid, he sat on the bed, and scooted all the way back and open his arms for Ilya to snuggle in to. Ilya went happily. A loud sigh as he rested his head on Shane’s chest. “Thank you.”
Shane wrapped his arm around Ilya. He kissed his head in reply.
They didn’t talk much, eventually Ilya dozed off. Shane’s eyes were drooping too, so he set an alarm for 3am so that Ilya could sneak out without anyone noticing, and fell asleep, holding Ilya.
Shane wakes 5 hours later to his alarm. Ilya still asleep curled in to his side. They’ve never woken up together, and he knows it’s not morning, but it still feels nice. He turns off his alarm and rubs circles on Ilyas back. He doesn’t wake up Ilya right away. He just lays and enjoys this domestic scene. After about 10 minutes, he figures he should wake him up. He moves his hands from ilyas back to his hair. He scratches his head nicely. “Hey.” He whispers, shaking him lightly.
Ilya groans and turns to his back. Arm over his eyes.
“What time is it?” Ilya groaned.
“three ten. Thought i’d wake you so you could sneak out before everyone starts waking up.” Shane said resting his hand in Ilyas hair.
“Mmm yeah. I should go.” Ilya sighs. But doesn’t move.
“You don’t have to, just yet. We could- i don’t know-“
Ilya sat up on his elbow, smiling at Shane.
“You want me to fuck you?” He grinned.
Shane chuckled and rolled his eyes.
“You just woke up. Are you ever not horny?”
Ilya leaned closer to Shane. “Not around you.” He smiled before kissing him, crawling on top of him. Shane sat up, Ilya sitting on his lap. His hands in Shane’s hair, and Shane’s on Ilyas face. After a bit, Ilya kissed down to Shane’s neck. Shane moaning in reassurance. He had his hand under Shane’s shirt and was gripping anywhere he could. Ilya sat up and took his shirt off. He helped Shane with his. “I’ve missed you.”
Shane murmured. Ilya kissed him hungry.
“Here wait, i uh..” Shane reached across to the bedside table, grabbing a condom and lube. Ilya was amused that Shane took the time to prepare like that. It made him want to fuck him more. He got Shane ready. Teasing him around his hole before opening him up. Shane shuttering as he does. Once he’s teased enough, and Ilyas dick was swelling as much as Shane’s, he got himself ready. He took his time, leaving Shane to whimper and beg for him. Of course, Ilya gave in. He layed down. “I want to watch you.” he said gripping Shane’s waist and pulling him on top of him. Shane whimpered as he lowered himself on to Ilyas dick. He slowly bounced up and down before speeding up. Ilyas hands dug in to Shane’s thighs. Shane was holding on to Ilyas chest. “Fuck- Rozanov..” Shane grunted. He bounced as Ilya pounded in to him. “I’m not going to last much- fuck” Shane whimpered.
Ilya was right behind him. “You gonna come for me Hollander?” He said through gritted teeth. “Fuck.” Shane murdered. He stilled. He came with a loud moan all over Ilyas chest. Not soon after, Ilya did too.
Shane fell forward. Ilya held him as they breathed heavy together. Ilya knew Shane will be bothered by the- “We should get cleaned up.” Shane huffed. Ilya almost laughed at how predictable he was. Shane got up and headed to the bathroom, after a bit he came back with a wet rag. He helped Ilya by cleaning his chest, then kissing him, and throwing the rag on the floor.
It’s quarter to 4 now. Ilya should really be heading out soon. But they lay on top of eachother, naked and unmoving.
after playing with Ilyas hair in silence for a bit, Shane finally broke it by saying something he’s never admitted out loud before.
“I think i’m gay.”
Ilya doesn’t say anything at first, but then he laughs and rolls over to his back, off of Shane. “What makes you say that?” He says through laughter.
“Fuck you. You’re not gay.”
Ilyas laughing calmed. He turned to his side, facing Shane, who was staring at the ceiling. His face didn’t look like he wanted to laugh about this. Ilya stopped laughing. He was propped up on his elbow, his other hand reaching for Shane’s hand. He held it in his.
“No. Not completely.”
“Well i think i am.. completely.”
Ilya rubbed Shane’s hand.
“So?” Ilya asked. Genuinely wondering why he’s talking about this.
Shane sighed.
“It’s not.. it’s not just that. It’s this. It’s us.” He frowned and looked over at Ilya, turning to his side.
“Hollander-“
“Ilya.”
Ilya closed his eyes. He held Shane’s hand tight.
“Shane. We can’t-“
“I know. But- would you want to? If we could?”
“We can’t.”
“That’s not what i asked.”
Ilya sighed. “I would not be able to go home. Do you understand that?”
“Because your parents?”
Shane did not understand.
“Because Russia. I would not be able to go back to Russia.”
“Oh.”
“What would happen to you?”
Ilya frowned. “I don’t want to find out.”
Shane held Ilyas hand. He kissed it. Ilyas heart swelled. He wishes he could have this. He wishes it were easy. He feels his eyes begin to burn and he turns away.
“Hey,” Shane leaned over.
“What about your parents?”
“My father..” Ilya hesitates to share, but he does. “.. he has dementia. He’s not doing well.” He quickly wipes a stupid tear away.
“Oh. I’m sorry.. what about your mom?”
Ilyas heart felt heavy. He reached for his mother’s crucifix with his free hand. “Dead.”
“Oh. I had no idea. I’m sorry Ilya.”
Ilya turned back to face Shane. Shane held him in his arms and pulled him in to his chest as Ilya continued to talk.
“My father- his dementia is getting worse. I had to remind him that mama is gone. That is why he threw his glass at me.” Ilya admitted. Shane didn’t know what to say. He just held him tighter. Pulling him tight in to his chest. Mumbling sweet nothings. He felt Ilya shutter, ever so slightly. He let him cry. Rubbing his back and holding him. “I’m sorry” Ilya muttered after a few moments.
Shane kissed the top of his head. “Are you feeling better?”
“A little bit. Thank you.”
Shane squeezed him one more time. “What time is it?” Ilya asked.
Shane turned and checked his phone on the nightstand. “Almost four thirty.”
Ilya sat up. “I should go. Check on my father. I should not have left.”
Shane sat up with him. “Okay. You’ll be okay?”
Ilya kissed him. “I’ll be okay. Thank you, Shane.” He smiled.
he stood and gathered his clothes. Throwing on his shirt and pants. He slid his shoes on and took a deep breath.
“Goodnight Shane.”
shane smiled at him from the bed. “Goodnight Ilya.”