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“Surprise!”
Batman grunted as he crashed through the door of the department store, wearing his full suit. His eyes immediately landed on the Clown Prince of Crime standing on top of the cashier, looking far too smug and gleeful.
Batman scanned the first floor, which was in charge of jewellery, wrist watches, fancy clothes, shoes… the kinds. Shockingly, no glass structures were left scattered around. In fact, no glass was broken at all. The whole floor looked as if Joker simply turned the lights on at midnight when no one was around, and Batman found it hard to believe that this was the mid-afternoon of a Monday. There was no one in sight - no customers, clerks… No one at all.
“Joker, what did you do?”
The damn clown just grinned. “Happy birthday, Bats! I cleared out the whole building for ya.”
Batman gave him a deadpanned look. “Gordon told me there were hostages. Where, are they?” he bit out.
“On the roof,” Joker waved his hand impatiently. “Not important. Do you want to pick your birthday gift or not?”
“By using the money you robbed?” Batman interrupted. “I’m heading for the hostages.”
“But, but, but you didn’t even pick a present first!” Joker jumped down onto the floor, blocking Batman’s way by spreading his hands wide.
Batman’s lips pursed slightly. “What did you do to the hostages? Did you kill them?”
“They’re not harm—”
Before he could finish, Batman pushed him aside, surprised that the clown didn’t resist much, and took off towards the door. He shot his grapple gun to the roof and flew up.
The roof was crowded. Workers and people who were happily shopping were all tied up against a wall or a poll of sorts with party ribbons and balloon strings. A large banner stuck on the far side of the wall read “Happy Birthday Batman!” with kiss marks and Disney stickers decorated on the sides.
Batman quickly made sure that everyone was alive, then ripped open one of the tapes on a woman’s mouth. “What did Joker do?” he murmured.
She panted. “His men used a gun to threaten us and tied us up, then all of them disappeared. It’s been hours!”
Batman nodded, his gaze shifting back to the banner and the birthday wishes on it. Was it possible? That Joker just did this for…
“There ya are, Bats!” Joker emerged from the stairwell, looking just a bit ruffled. “How do you like the decorations? I knew you’d come here.”
“You can’t just…rob a store for my birthday,” Batman turned. “Turn yourself in and release the hostages now.”
For the first time today, Joker’s face fell and his hopeful smile vanished.
“But, but I did this for you. I didn’t even kill anyone!”
“It doesn’t matter. I said, release them.”
Joker stared at Batman for a long time, long enough for Batman to shift a little as well. “Ok. If that’s what you want,” he said quietly.
One by one, Joker snapped off their restraints with his small knife. Batman watched closely, in case he suddenly changed his mind. A hint of what felt too close to guilt crept into Batman’s mind. He tried to shake it off.
“Joker, I…appreciate your efforts, for my birthday,” he heard himself say.
“Doesn’t matter. It’s not like I planned it for six whole months anyway,” said Joker. A small pout was beginning to form at his lips, but he pursed them together to hide it.
Alright. The guilt was hard to shove off now.
Batman took a step forward hesitantly. “I’m…sorry, Joker. I didn’t mean to—”
“I said it doesn’t matter,” Joker said, more defensively. He straightened himself and sheathed his blade. “There. All the hostages are released. Happy? I’ll see you tomorrow, birthday boy. A card for you there by the way.”
Joker jabbed his fingers at a small platform a few feet away from them, and headed to the stairs without looking back.
“Wait! Joker—” Batman blurted out. His right hand shot out as if he could grasp the air Joker left behind.
But the clown was gone.
Batman walked over to the platform and bent over to pick up the letter. He carefully tore it open.
Hey Bats, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! I actually don’t know how old u are…… (don’t ask me how I know your birthday!) I
loveHATE you (forever) <3333
Batman read it for longer than necessary, then folded it, clutching the card in his hand. He turned, knowing that all the people were likely staring at him, and walked down the stairs as quickly as possible.
He knew he would see the man tomorrow. He just hoped it was soon enough for him to make up for Joker.