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Severus Snape had many roles in this war.
Professor, Head of House, Potions master, Spy, Death eater, Double agent.
It made it easy for people to forget that he was just a man.
A tired, overworked, bitter, (and frankly depressed) one.
The order meeting had just started, but he already felt exhausted. He was barely listening to the droning voice of whoever was talking.
He probably shouldn’t have stayed up and brewed last night, but could you blame him? The stock in the hospital wing was running low and it was his responsibility to stock up.
Trust accident seeking kids like Potter, and pampered one’s like Draco to burn through the stock like water. Requesting a blood replenisher for a paper cut, honestly - the young Malfoy really was ridiculous!
So, no one could blame him when his eyelids started to feel heavy.
Severus Snape was not the type of man to let his guard down easily, he’d certainly never fallen asleep during a death eater meeting!
However, deep down - he knew that he was safe in the presence of the order. Proud people like them would never take pride in attacking a man in his sleep! Well perhaps Moody or Black…
But it wasn’t just that, he had grown a little fond and trusting of many of the members. Minerva, who he had once seen as a feared teacher was now a friend and a confidant, Albus, however manipulate and allowing he was of Severus to rejoin the Dark Lord’s ranks would never allow harm to befall him if there wasn’t a good reason too. Arthur, with his carefree love for everything muggle, Molly, a woman who would undoubtedly kill for her children, Tonks, who he had taught - a young woman so clumsy it made him wonder how she passed the Auror exam…
So, when his eyelids stared to droop yet again, he didn’t fight as hard as he usually did to combat it.
He’d just close his eyes real quick. It’s not like anyone would notice…
A thump made the whole order jolt, and look towards the direction of the sound.
The creation of the sound came as a huge surprise to everyone in the room.
Next to Minerva, was Severus Snape - who was currently face down on the table.
”Holy shit, I think Sniv just died on us.”
Said black, who sounded both excited at the thought, and also a little uncertain.
Minerva shot him a glare.
”Severus is perfectly alive and healthy. Well, maybe not healthy. Poor guy barely gets any sleep these days, not to mention how much he’s been overworking himself!”
Albus looked at Severus thoughtfully, pity shining through his expression. “Severus has been working exceptionally hard these days, just this morning - Poppy informed me that Severus had restocked the infirmary!”
”What, so we just let him sleep?” Asked Kingsley sceptically
”I don’t see why not,” answered Dumbledore. “He has given all the information he was expected to contribute today.”
After a beat of silence, Lupin spoke up uncertainly
”I’d never expect him to allow himself to be so… vulnerable. It’s not like he’s passing out in death eaters meetings!”
The headmaster smiled serenely
”Severus does not give his trust easily… no, not at all. I hope this helps many of you realise that while he may not speak many kind words, his actions show that he does indeed care for and trust us.
Many people still looked uncertain
”Enough about Snape, Tonks - don’t ’ya Have a report to give?” Said Moody abruptly.
The concept of an ex death eater, one as untrusting of Snape allowing himself to fall asleep in his presence was unfamiliar and odd.
During the meeting, slowly but surely - more things started to gather on and around Snape.
At first, Minerva summoned and draped a (particularly Gryffindor patterned) blanket over him, followed by Albus adding a few wandless and wordless warming charms over him. Once the meeting started to get a little rowdy, Kingsley cast a silencing charm around him so he wouldn’t get woken up. Sirius wanted to play a prank on Snape, but got held back by Remus who claimed that ‘he shouldn’t abuse Severus’s rare trust!’
Even moody cast a few charms over Snape, anti dark and anti harm magic that kept danger away while he slept, or would wake him if anyone approached him with Ill intentions. Sirius. He brushed off the incredulous looks that act gained him, as he was usually the first, other than Siruis - to jump on the Severus Snape hate bandwagon.
But a guarded man who fell asleep in his presence due to overworking and brewing for schoolchildren didn’t seem like the death eater he had always assumed Snape to be.
As the meeting was finally adjourned and a few people started to shuffle out, many cast sidelong glances at the still sleeping man.
Since the meeting today wasn’t particularly grim, many members gathered in the living room that neighboured the meeting room to chat. As Molly bustled about, serving people with homemade pastries and food, she slipped back into the meeting room and left Snape a pile of pastries under a heating charm.
As Tonks grew bored of the conversation, she got ready to depart Grimauld place. However, just as she was about to leave, she turned back and entered the meeting room again with a goal in mind.
She was surprised to see Arthur at Snape’s side. The asleep man was covered in so many charms they were visible around his body, and Arthur delicately set down a Muggle object next to the plate of pastries on the table. He suddenly looked up and saw Tonks watching him. He looked embarrassed to be caught and hurried to explain himself
”I- well I recently found out that Severus is actually a half blood and we got to talking, and-“
She cut of him off with a wave of her hand
”Nah, it’s cool. Almost every member’s done something for him tonight. I think it’s nice, he does a lot for the order. I’m actually gonna write him a note. Otherwise he’d probably wake up pretty confused and probably embarrassed when he wakes.”
He lit up
”That’s a good idea! I can’t believe no one’s thought of doing that!”
———
Remus approached the Meeting room hesitantly, a steaming mug of tea in hand.
He hoped Severus hadn’t woken up and departed already.
He was thankful to see that the black cloaked man was still there when he entered the room, but was alarmed to see Siruis near him.
Alarm quickly faded to confusion when he saw Siruis simply cast a cleaning and freshening charm on the man, fixing his wrinkled cloak, tousled hair, and drool that was running down his chin.
Sirius wirled around and it was clear he didn’t want to be spotted doing an innocent act.
”It-It’s not what you think!” He spluttered.
”Considering how I still have to sleep here tonight, if Snape wakes and and sees fucking drool on his chin, the prideful bastard would probably storm upstairs and get pissy with me in the middle of the damn night! I’m just trying to save my sleep!”
Siruis looked as if he was trying to convince himself of that fact.
Remus simply smiled and inclined his head.
“What are you doing here Mooney?”
Siruis asked suspiciously, and it was now time for Remus to get embarrassed
”I, well - considering how he always brings me Wolfsbane, I figured that the least I could do was bring him a cup of tea!” He held up the mug in his left hand and set it down on the table.
The two men started at eachother for multiple seconds as Snape continued to slumber peacefully.
”We’re never speaking about this again.”
”Agreed.”
The two men turned and walked off.
When Severus Snape woke, he felt better than he had in days, despite quickly realising that he fell asleep over a table.
Had he fallen asleep at his desk again?
But then, the memories quickly came rushing back. Merlin, he had fallen asleep at the meeting!
As he sat up, he felt a blanket slide off of him. As he looked closely, he realised it was a red and gold blanket, with cats and lions on them. Minerva. She probably grinned at seeing such a blanket on him.
He then realised the sheer amount of charms on him - he felt like a whole class of students had just practised warming and protection charms on him.
His eyes fell on the strange contents that occupied the table space around him, but he figured that the note was a good place to start
———
Hi Professor Snape!
Youve probably just woken up and you’re feeling awfully confused
dw, so basically, ya fell asleep at the meeting, everyone basically listened to Dumbledore agreed that you needed sleep.
Anywho, since you never let people show their gratitude when you’re awake (tho ngl, they don’t try very hard to give it,) it seemed people are much kinder to you when you’re not insulting them. Or awake
The numerous charms around you can be pointed at Dumbledore, Kingsley, & Moody (of all people!!) the blanket Minerva, the pastries Molly, the muggle thing (I don’t recognise it,) Arthur, and anything else can likely be contributed to Remus or Siruis (though I highly doubt Siruis wouldve given you anything.)
Anywho, have a good night, don’t be mad - and please get more sleep before meetings next time!!
Ps: quit overworking urself dude
pss: I think tonight showed how much we all appreciate ur service for us, even if we don’t say it! (Though I reckon you’re also a actions talk louder than words kinda person)
— Tonks
———
Severus stared at the paper for a long time processing the words as an unfamiliar feeling stirred in his gut.
He felt - Cared for… appreciated
These are words that had never had anything to do with him before.
He felt the powerful charms roll over him in waves (seriously, a personal heating charm from Albus Dumbledore, and protection/silencing charms from top famous Aurors?) He was probably currently warded from the dark lord himself…
As he nibbled on the pastries and sipped on tea (that he guessed came from Remus), he contemplated his own emotions. As a master occluder, he was hyper self-aware of emotions, and he knew what he was currently feeling. Love, affection, care.
Was this the ‘family’ he had been promised when he had naively joined the death eaters as a young adult?
He had always wanted to belong, to be cared for. Had he found it? Among the light? Among people like Tonks, Dumbledore, Moody & Lupin?
Preposterous.
But as he sipped his tea and cast a Tempus spell (1am)
He felt no rush.
No pressure
He felt lighter than he had in…
A long time.
He couldn’t help but smile softly in the dim and empty meeting room, imagining Tonks scrawling out the note and crossing certain phrases out, Minerva draping a criminally Gryffindor blanket over him, Moody trying to play off casting protection charms over an ex death eater.
(If he only knew about Sirius’s freshening charms)
Merlin, Severus Snape was becoming soft.
For the Bloody Order of the Phoenix.
He cared
They cared
He felt warm