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Any had a secret.
It was a very serious secret.
A dramatic secret.
A secret so important that she wrote it in her diary using pink glitter pen with bunny and butterfly stickers and then locked the diary inside her drawer, even though the lock could be opened with a paperclip and her mother Bonnie absolutely knew where the spare key was.
The secret was this:
Any had a crush on Pond.
Unfortunately, Pond was not ten years old.
He was not eleven either.
He was, in fact, very much an adult.
He was also married.
To Phuwin. Her Uncle PhuPhu.
And he was the father of Any’s best friend, Permpoon.
This did not stop Any from sighing into her pillow like the heroine of a drama.
“He is so handsome,” she whispered to her stuffed rabbit.
The rabbit had no opinion.
Any continued anyway.
“And he makes pancakes shaped like bunnies and bears. He’s my superhero.”
That, to Any, was very important.
A person who made bear and bunny pancakes was clearly special.
Pond also laughed loudly, carried grocery bags in one hand, let children sit on his shoulders and reach the ceiling, and once fixed Any’s broken bracelet with such seriousness that she had nearly fainted from admiration.
He had said, all smiles and with tender care, “There. Good as new.”
Any had said, “Thank you, Uncle Pond.”
But inside, she had thought:
I will remember this forever.
At school, she began sitting beside Permpoon more often.
Permpoon noticed immediately.
This was because he was ten years old and very observant when snacks were involved.
“Why are you always asking if you can come over?” he asked suspiciously one afternoon while they were drawing superheroes.
Any tried to look casual.
“I like your house.”
Permpoon narrowed his eyes.
“You said our stairs are too loud.”
“I like loud stairs now,” Any shrugged.
“You said your house has better juice.”
“I am growing as a person,” she looked at Permpoon with her judgmental eyes.
Permpoon stared at her.
Then his eyes widened.
“Oh.”
Any froze.
“What?”
Permpoon leaned closer.
“You like someone.”
Any’s eyes grew like 2 saucers. She tried not to panic and failed, miserably.
“No.”
“You do!”
“No!”
“You want to come to my house because you like someone there.”
Any’s face turned red.
Permpoon gasped.
“You like me?”
Any choked on air. “What?”
Permpoon sat back, stunned. Unbelieving that his beloved friend had been harboring feelings for him.
“You like me,” he sounded more sure now. Any grew redder by the minute.
“I didn’t say that!”
“You didn’t say ‘no’ fast enough.”
“I said no!”
“But with panic,” Permpoon responded calmly.
Any opened her mouth.
Closed it.
Opened it again.
Permpoon looked strangely pleased and horrified at the same time.
“I need to think,” he said.
“About what?”
“About us.”
“There is no us!” Any’s arms were flailing on her side. Her friend was making the worst assumption ever and she couldn’t prove how wrong he was or else her secret would get exposed.
Permpoon put a hand over his heart.
“This is a lot, Any-kins.”
Any stared at him.
He was impossible.
Absolutely impossible. Men are impossible.
Except for Uncle Pond.
Unfortunately, clearing up the misunderstanding would mean telling him the truth, and Any would rather eat a whole plate of bitter melon.
So she said nothing.
Permpoon took her silence as confirmation.
This was how the disaster began.
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The next Saturday, Any asked her parents if she could go to Permpoon’s house.
Again. For the 6th time that month.
Emi looked over from the kitchen counter.
“Again?”
Any nodded. “For homework.”
Bonnie walked in holding a laundry basket.
“It’s Saturday, bunny-kins.”
“Group homework.” Emi looked at Bonnie, disbelief in her eyes but she couldn’t outright say it to their little girl or else she might throw tantrums.
“You and Permpoon are in different sections.”
“We share Ms. Pahnitta for math. It’s cross-section homework, Mimi.”
Emi stared.
Any smiled sweetly.
Bonnie slowly placed the laundry basket down.
“Anya.”
Any froze.
Her full name.
Danger.
“Yes, Nini?”
Bonnie crossed her arms. “Is this about a crush?”
Any’s soul left her body. She paled as white as a ghost. That was her giveaway.
Emi gasped softly.
“Oh?”
“No,” Any said too fast. But not too fast that she was able to mask her panic from her two moms.
Bonnie looked at Emi.
Emi looked at Bonnie.
Both mothers looked back at Any.
Any tried to escape by drinking water.
Unfortunately, she was not holding water.
She was holding a pencil.
“Baby,” Emi said gently, “it’s okay to have crushes.”
Any looked down.
Bonnie sat beside her.
“As long as we talk about them kindly and safely.”
Any’s shoulders relaxed slightly.
“So,” Emi asked, smiling, “is it Permpoon?”
Any made a face before she could stop herself.
Bonnie blinked.
“Oh.”
Emi covered her mouth.
Any panicked.
“I mean, Permpoon is nice!”
“Of course,” Bonnie nodded carefully.
“He shares snacks.”
“That’s very important, our bunny-kins,” Emi agreed.
“And he is my friend.”
Bonnie’s smile softened. “But not your crush?”
Any shook her head.
Emi tilted her head in wonder.
“Then who?”
Any clutched her pencil.
“No one.”
Her mothers waited.
Any had inherited many things from them.
Dramatic eyes from Emi.
Stubbornness from Bonnie.
Unfortunately, she had not inherited the ability to withstand gentle silence. And she couldn’t lie to save her life. Or her moms’.
She whispered, “Uncle Pond.”
The kitchen became very quiet.
Emi blinked.
Bonnie blinked.
Any covered her face and started tearing up. “I know!”
Bonnie immediately put an arm around her.
“Hey, hey. You’re not in trouble.”
Emi knelt in front of her.
“Baby, look at me.”
Any peeked through her fingers.
Emi was trying very hard not to laugh.
Bonnie was trying even harder.
Any frowned.
“You’re laughing.”
“No,” Bonnie said.
Emi made a small choking sound.
Bonnie gave her a look.
Emi coughed.
“Sorry. Not laughing at you. It’s just… Uncle Pond?”
“He makes bear and bunny pancakes,” Any said defensively.
Bonnie pressed her lips together.
Emi nodded solemnly.
“That is a powerful skill.”
“And he fixed my bracelet.”
“Also powerful.”
“And he’s tall. I can reach the ceiling whenever we play airplanes.”
Bonnie whispered, “So is the refrigerator.”
Any glared, “Nini!”
Bonnie immediately kissed her forehead.
“Sorry. Yes, Uncle Pond is very likeable.”
Emi shook her head at Bonnie and gently took Any’s hands.
“Sweetheart, having a crush on a grown-up can happen. Sometimes kids admire adults because they’re kind, funny, handsome, talented, or make bear and bunny pancakes.”
Any nodded. “All of those.”
“Yes,” Emi said gently. “But grown-ups are not people for kids to date or be romantic with.”
Any looked embarrassed. “I know, Mimi.”
“We know you know,” Bonnie said. “But it’s our job to remind you. Uncle Pond is your friend’s dad. He’s also married to Uncle PhuPhu.”
Any sighed dramatically.
“I also know that.”
“And you are ten,” Emi added.
“Yes, Mimi.” Any was looking down, hands playing distractedly on her lap.
“So, for now, crushes should stay small and safe,” Bonnie said. “It’s better to have crushes on people your age, and even then, friendship comes first.”
Any nodded slowly. A pregnant pause enveloped their household. Everyone’s scared to say something, until Any did.
“So, I can’t go to their house anymore?” She whispered.
Emi softened.
“You can. But you go there to play with Permpoon. Not to stare at Uncle Pond like he’s in a music video.”
Any gasped. “I do not!”
Bonnie raised an eyebrow.
“You asked me last week if your hair looked ‘casual but elegant’ before going to their house.”
Any covered her face again.
Emi finally laughed, then hugged her immediately.
“Oh, baby. First crushes are tough.”
Any groaned into her mother’s shoulder.
“Being ten is very hard.”
Bonnie stroked her hair.
“It is.”
“And embarrassing.”
“Very.”
“And Uncle Pond can never know.”
Emi and Bonnie exchanged a look.
“Of course,” Bonnie said.
“Never,” Emi promised. Sort of.
They were lying.
Not maliciously.
Parentally.
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At Pond and Phuwin’s house, Permpoon had prepared.
This was his first mistake.
He had cleaned his room.
This was suspicious enough that Phuwin stood in the doorway, ready with fever patches and said, “Are you ill?”
Permpoon looked offended.
“No, Daddy.”
“You cleaned your desk.”
“I am mature now,” Permpoon said proudly.
Pond, passing by with laundry, stopped. His mouth formed an ‘o’ in surprise.
“Our son is possessed.”
“I am not, Papa!”
Phuwin narrowed his eyes.
“Did you break something?”
“No.”
“Did you fail a quiz?”
“No. That’s insulting, Daddy.” Phuwin raised his hands in defeat.
Slowly, they approached Permpoon by his study table. “Did you promise someone money?” Phuwin carefully asked. Pond still standing beside him, watching his little bear squirm in nervousness.
“No! Stop asking, Daddy. Papa, make Daddy stop!”
Pond didn’t hear anything. Or rather, refused to hear his child’s please and leaned down.
“Is this about Any coming over?” He whispered like it’s a secret between them and Phuwin couldn’t know.
Permpoon froze.
Phuwin looked at Pond.
Pond looked at Phuwin.
Both parents slowly turned back to their son.
Permpoon’s ears turned red.
“Oh,” Phuwin said.
Pond gasped. “Oh.”
“Stop saying oh!” Permpoon shouted.
Phuwin slowly sat on the bed.
“Do you like Any, P’Perm?”
Permpoon panicked.
“I don’t know!”
Pond set the laundry basket down and sat beside Phuwin.
“That is fair.”
Permpoon paced.
“She wants to come here all the time.”
Phuwin’s eyes sharpened with amusement.
“Does she?”
“Yes.”
“And what does that mean, little bear?”
Permpoon looked at him like the answer was obvious.
“Of course, it means she likes me.”
Pond nodded slowly in realization. “Possible.”
Phuwin looked at Pond and mouthed Stop encouraging him!
Pond added quickly, “But not confirmed.”
Permpoon groaned.
“She asked if Papa was home last time.”
Pond perked up.
“Me?”
Phuwin’s smile became dangerous. “Interesting.”
Permpoon waved this away.
“Because she wanted pancakes.”
Pond looked pleased, hand on his chest and tears at bay. “My pancakes are famous.”
Phuwin rolled his eyes and murmured, “Unfortunately.”
Permpoon sat heavily on the chair.
“What do I do?”
Phuwin softened.
“You do nothing big.”
“Nothing?”
“You be her friend.”
“But what if she confesses?”
Pond looked emotional. “My son’s first romantic crisis.”
Phuwin said, “He is ten, babe.”
Pond sniffed. “Still.”
Permpoon looked horrified. “Do not cry, Papa.”
Pond immediately straightened. “I’m fine.”
Phuwin took Permpoon’s hand.
“Little bear, if Any does like you, you can be kind. You do not have to like her back. You also do not have to decide anything. You are both children. You are responsible, P’Perm. But you’re still Daddy and Papa’s baby bear.”
Permpoon nodded slowly.
“And if I maybe like her?”
Pond gasped again.
Phuwin covered Pond’s mouth with one hand.
“Then you still focus on friendship first.”
Permpoon considered this. “Friendship first.”
“Yes.”
“Can friendship include sharing mango?”
“Yes.”
“Can it include sitting together?”
“Yes.”
“Can it include marriage?”
“No,” Phuwin and Pond said at the same time.
Permpoon sighed. “Fine.”
The doorbell rang.
Permpoon stood so fast he almost tripped.
Pond whispered, “He likes her.”
Phuwin whispered back, “He’s ten, Pond.”
Pond whispered, “Emotionally, so am I.”
Phuwin looked at him. “What do I do with you, my big bear?”
Pond smiled, “Cuddles? Growth?”
“Debatable,” Phuwin chuckled at his silly husband.
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Any arrived wearing a yellow dress, glitter clips, and the determined expression of someone trying to look casual but elegant.
Bonnie and Emi stood behind her. Their hands on her shoulders.
Bonnie looked at Phuwin with the face of a parent carrying a secret too funny to keep.
Phuwin immediately knew something was wrong. He raised his eyebrow as if asking What are you not telling me?
Bonnie just winked at her best friend.
“Hi,” Any said as she shyly waved her right hand.
Permpoon stood near the door, eyes shining and cheeks blushing.
“Hi, Any.”
Pond appeared behind Phuwin, holding a spatula.
“Any! Perfect timing. I’m making pancakes.”
Any’s eyes sparkled.
Permpoon saw.
His heart sank.
Not fully.
Just a little.
Maybe she really liked pancakes. Permpoon thought.
That was fine.
Pancakes were understandable rivals. Especially his Papa’s special pancakes.
Then Pond smiled and said, “Do you want bear-shaped ones or bunny ones?”
Any turned pink.
“Yes, Uncle Pond. Both please.”
Permpoon frowned.
Phuwin noticed.
Bonnie noticed.
Emi noticed.
Pond noticed nothing.
This was normal.
The afternoon began peacefully.
The kids played board games.
Pond made pancakes.
Phuwin made sure the children and adults ate fruit too. He offered peaches, apples, and oranges.
Any laughed at everything Pond said.
Permpoon began to look increasingly tragic.
When Pond walked into the living room and asked, “Who wants more syrup?” Any sat up so quickly she knocked over a game piece and enthusiastically raised her hand like she was on a quiz bee.
“I do! I do, Uncle Pond!”
Permpoon stared at her.
“You don’t even like too much syrup.” He deadpanned.
Any froze and slowly lowered her hand.
“I changed.” She said carefully.
“You keep changing near my Papa.”
Any’s eyes widened. “That’s not-- not…” She stuttered, rendered speechless by her own friend.
Phuwin, upon hearing the commotion from their kitchen, slowly turned around and looked at the kids. He quickly took a glance at Bonnie, looking for answers but Bonnie was already looking devastated over her daughter.
Bonnie whispered, “Oh no.”
Emi whispered, “It’s happening.” She held her wife’s hand, preparing for their girl’s first heartbreak.
Pond, still holding syrup, looked confused.
“What’s happening?”
Phuwin walked towards his clueless but gorgeous husband and patted his arm.
“Nothing you’re emotionally prepared for.”
The adults quickly defused the tension and proceeded to have their lunch with the kids.
The final disaster came after lunch.
Pond sat on the couch beside Phuwin while the adults talked and the children drew on the floor.
It was ordinary.
Soft.
Domestic.
Pond leaned over and kissed Phuwin’s cheek because Phuwin had handed him coffee exactly the way he liked it.
“Thank you, my love.”
Any froze.
Her crayon stopped moving.
Permpoon saw, heart beating fast as he realized what’s about to happen.
Muvmuv and Lunar were not there, but somehow the spirit of child drama filled the room.
Phuwin looked at Pond.
Pond looked at Phuwin.
Bonnie slowly covered her mouth.
Emi whispered, “Oh, sweetheart.”
Any’s eyes filled with tears.
Then, before anyone could stop her, she stood. “Why did you do that?” She pointed at Pond with all the might her tiny plump body could give.
Pond blinked. “Do what?”
“Kiss Uncle PhuPhu!”
The room went silent.
Permpoon dropped his crayon.
Pond looked at Phuwin in panic.
Phuwin’s eyes widened slightly, and then his face softened with sudden understanding.
Any’s tears spilled over. “You’re always sweet with him!”
Pond said very carefully, “Because he’s my husband.”
Any let out a dramatic sob. “I know! It’s unfair!”
Permpoon stared at her.
Then at Pond.
Then at Any.
Then his face collapsed.
“You like my Papa?” He asked slowly, as he tried to understand the words he just said.
Any cried harder.
Permpoon looked betrayed.
“I thought you liked me!” He whined.
Any sniffed.
“No!”
Permpoon gasped like he had been stabbed.
Pond whispered, “Oh my god.”
Phuwin whispered, “Do not make this about you, love.”
Bonnie immediately went to Any. “Baby, come here.”
Any ran into her arms, crying.
Emi crouched beside them.
“It’s okay, bunny-kins. Big feelings, remember?”
Any sobbed, “Uncle Pond loves Uncle PhuPhu!”
Pond looked deeply uncomfortable.
Phuwin, despite the situation, was looking like he was trying not to laugh. Noticing Pond's discomfort, he caressed Pond’s arms to help him calm down.
Permpoon stood frozen.
“You really don’t like me?” Tears already burning at the edge of his eyes.
Any wiped her face. “I like you as a friend!” She didn’t mean to sound defensive but feeling cornered by everyone outside her safe space was not helping her calm down.
Permpoon looked even more offended. “As a friend?”
Pond pressed a hand to his chest. “My son.”
Phuwin took Permpoon’s hand and gently pulled him close.
“Come here, baby bear.”
Permpoon went, still devastated, now full on bawling on his Daddy’s shoulder. Pond wrapped his arms around his husband and brokenhearted child.
“I cleaned my room, Daddy.”
Phuwin hugged him.
“I know.”
“For her.”
“I know.”
“She likes Papa.”
Pond looked horrified.
“Please don’t phrase it like that.”
Any wailed, “I can’t help it! It’s not my fault!”
Bonnie kissed her hair. “I know, baby. Crushes can feel big.”
Emi added gently, “But remember what we talked about?”
Any sniffed.
“That Uncle Pond is grown-up.”
“Yes.”
“And married.”
“Yes.”
“And I’m ten.”
“Very important detail,” Bonnie said.
“And I should like people my age.”
“Or just focus on friendship,” Emi said. “There is no rush to like anyone.”
Any looked miserable.
“But he makes bear pancakes. And bunny pancakes. And they’re so cute and yummy.”
Pond whispered, “I should stop making pancakes.”
Phuwin whispered, “Too late. You’ve ruined the youth.”
Pond looked at him.
Phuwin patted his cheek. “Handsome problems, my love.”
In his arms, Permpoon was silently sniffing as he tried to wipe his tears.
“I thought Any liked me because I’m nice.” He looked at Any, disappointment and hurt apparent in his eyes.
Any looked at him, alarmed. “You are nice, P’Perm!”
“Not bear-pancake nice. Nor bunny-pancake nice.”
Any sniffed, feeling more guilty of causing her friend’s heartache. “You share snacks!”
“That is not the same!”
Pond covered his face. He couldn’t believe that their normal Sunday brunch had come into this. It was sort of funny if his son wasn’t crying because of him. And also Any.
Phuwin pulled Permpoon closer.
“Permpoon, sweetheart, Any not having a crush on you does not mean you are not wonderful.”
Permpoon sniffed. “It doesn’t?”
“No. You are wonderful because you are you. Not because someone has a crush on you.”
Permpoon looked at Any.
Any looked at him.
Both children looked tragic.
Bonnie said, “And Any, having a crush on Uncle Pond doesn’t make you bad.”
Any sniffed and with red-rimmed eyes, she asked her Mimi, “It doesn’t?”
“No,” Emi said. “It just means you admire him. But admiration doesn’t mean we act like he can be our boyfriend.”
Pond made a strangled sound.
Phuwin elbowed him.
Any nodded slowly.
“So I can think he’s handsome but not try to marry him?”
Pond whispered, “I am leaving the country.”
Phuwin whispered, “Stay, love.”
Bonnie smiled gently.
“Yes. You can think someone is handsome. But for romantic crushes, it’s better to focus on people your age when you’re older. Right now, friendship, school, play, and being a kid come first.”
Emi added, “And Uncle Pond can still be a safe grown-up in your life. Like an uncle that he has always been.”
Any sighed.
“An uncle with good and cute pancakes.”
Pond nodded solemnly.
“I accept this title.”
Permpoon frowned. “So Any can still come over?”
Phuwin looked at Any.
“Do you want to come over as Permpoon’s friend?”
Any nodded.
Then looked at Permpoon. “I’m sorry I made you think I liked you.”
Permpoon wiped his nose and shrugged.
“It’s okay, I’m a big boy. I can handle it.”
A pause.
Then he a peek of insecurity a 10-year-old kid could have, he asked, “Do you maybe like me a little?”
Any thought about it. “As my best friend.” She smiled.
Permpoon considered this. “Best friend is high rank.”
“Yes.”
“Higher than Papa?”
Any looked at Pond.
Then at Permpoon.
Pond held his breath, absurdly invested.
Any nodded.
“Higher. Because Uncle Pond is grown-up and married and cannot play spaceship prison properly.”
Permpoon brightened. “I am very good at spaceship prison.” He said proudly.
“You are.”
Pond whispered, “I have been humbled.”
Phuwin smiled.
“Finally.”
Any wiped her tears.
“Can we still play?”
Permpoon nodded.
“But not wedding.”
“No wedding.”
“Not romance.”
“No romance.”
“Friendship?”
Any held out her pinky and nodded. “Friendship.”
Permpoon linked his pinky with hers.
The adults collectively exhaled.
Then Any looked at Pond. “Can you still make bear and bunny pancakes, Uncle Pond?”
Pond looked at Phuwin.
Phuwin shrugged.
Pond nodded seriously. “Safely uncle-coded pancakes for my niece, Any.”
Any smiled, “Yes. Uncle pancakes.”
The children ran back to the living room, sadness forgotten with the alarming speed of ten-year-olds.
Five minutes later, they were arguing about whether the laundry basket spaceship had a kitchen.
The adults stayed in the dining area, emotionally exhausted.
Pond sat down heavily. “I have never felt so objectified by a child’s pancake standards.”
Bonnie laughed. “I’m sorry, bro.”
Emi covered her face. “We really did talk to her, but I guess seeing it in action really made it more real and scary for her.”
Phuwin smiled. “You handled it beautifully.” He held Emi’s hand in his. Gentle and reassuring. Parent to another parent.
Pond looked at him. “You enjoyed my suffering.”
Phuwin chuckled, “A little.”
“Our son was heartbroken.”
“He recovered when promoted to best friend.”
Pond sighed. “Best friend is high rank.”
Phuwin patted his hand.
“Yes, Uncle Pond. I’m glad that you’re learning.”
From the living room, Any shouted, “Permpoon, your dad cannot be captain because he is too old!”
Pond gasped.
Phuwin laughed.
Emi and Bonnie both looked scandalized by their daughter’s lack of tact.
Permpoon shouted back, “My dad can be kitchen crew!”
Any considered this.
“Okay!”
Pond stood and brushed his pants. “I have been summoned.”
Phuwin grabbed his wrist. “No.”
“But spaceship kitchen, Phu.”
“You are still emotionally dangerous.”
“I am uncle-coded now.”
“You are staying here.” Phuwin said sternly.
Pond sat back down obediently, pouting.
Bonnie smiled. “Thank you for being gentle with her.”
Pond’s expression softened. “She’s a kid. Big feelings are hard.”
Phuwin looked at him fondly. “And you would know.”
Pond pointed at him. “That was unnecessary.”
“Accurate.”
“Mean.”
“Married.”
Pond’s face softened.
“Yes. To me.”
He leaned in to kiss Phuwin’s cheek, then froze.
Everyone froze.
From the living room, Any shouted, “It’s okay, Uncle Pond! He’s your husband!”
Pond, Phuwin, Emi, and Bonnie all burst out laughing.
Permpoon added loudly with two arms raised above his tiny shoulderes, “And I am best friend!”
Any shouted and raised her hands as well, “High rank!”
Phuwin leaned into Pond’s side, laughing.
Pond kissed his temple anyway.
This time, no one cried.
In the living room, Any and Permpoon built a spaceship prison with a pancake kitchen, two captains, one stuffed rabbit passenger, and very strict rules about age-appropriate crushes.
Any still thought Uncle Pond was handsome.
But now he was safely filed under:
Grown-up. Married. Makes pancakes. Not for romance.
Permpoon, meanwhile, decided best friend was better than crush anyway because best friends shared snacks and did not require dramatic misunderstandings.
At least, not all the time.
And the adults, watching them play, understood again what parenting often meant:
Not stopping children from having big feelings.
Just helping those feelings land somewhere soft, kind, and safe.
Later, when Any went home, she opened her diary and wrote:
Today I learned Uncle Pond is handsome but married. Permpoon is best friend. Best friend is high rank. Also, bear and bunny pancakes are still important.
Then she drew a heart.
Crossed it out.
Drew a pancake shaped like wobbly bear and irregularly shaped bunny instead.
Much better.