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2016-12-28
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A Deeper Connection

Summary:

Coda to Chapter 7 of "needs must", written with permission of thatotherperv. The spanking scene from Harvey's pov. Small spoilers for the rest of the story. Probably best to read all of "needs must" first.

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Harvey's pissed.

Well, pissed and worried. Worried that's something's happened to Mike, and a small undercurrent of worry that nothing has.

Harvey doesn't want to fire Mike, he really doesn't. Not after all he went through to get him there in the first place. But this isn't going to work if Mike doesn't obey him. Some Doms enjoy having a bratty sub who disobeys them for the sheer joy of being punished, but Harvey's never been that way. Disobedience does nothing but antagonize him.

He looks up from his briefs at the sound of the elevator door. Mike emerges, naked and obviously extremely nervous. He waffles by his collar uncertainly for a moment, and most of Harvey's worry evaporates into anger.

“Get it, and come here,” he says sharply.

Mike scrambles over to him, fingers fumbling with his collar. He tries to go to his knees, but no, absolutely not. Being on his knees for Harvey is supposed to be a place of safety, and gentleness. Now is not the time for either of those.

“Stand.”

Mike freezes, and lowers his head immediately. Harvey feels slight relief at the sincerity in it. Perhaps he won't have to fire him.

“I assume you have a reason for being late?” He doesn't remotely try to hide the disapproval in his tone.

Mike hesitates, but eventually replies, in a small voice, “No.”

And that certainly does nothing good for Harvey's temper.

“So you broke a condition of your employment for no reason whatsoever,” he says flatly.

"I...I don't know why I did it."

Mike's face is flushed, and he looks about two seconds away from crying. Some of Harvey's fury fades a little, but he does his best not to show it. Exhibiting weakness in front of Mike at the moment would be the worst thing to do in this situation.

"Did you want to piss me off?"

“No,” Mike says quickly.

“Did you want to get in trouble?”

“No.” Mike's voice wavers. Harvey feels a sudden stab of fear.

“Were you trying to get yourself fired?”

Terror crosses Mike's face, and Harvey's gut unclenches slightly. “No! Harvey, please, I swear I didn't want that!”

So he wasn't trying to get himself fired. That's something. Okay, more than something. And while Harvey doesn't normally give second chances, Mike's contrition seems genuine, and Harvey reads people for a living. Not to mention the fact that Mike is absurdly easy to read. Still, there's no way he's going to allow this to happen more than once.

“You nearly succeeded on all three counts. Do this again, and you are fired. Are we clear?”

“We're clear, I won't.” The relief in Mike's voice is overwhelming, and the fear in Harvey's stomach disappears.

Harvey reaches for Mike's hand and tugs him down over his knees, and a part of Harvey wonders if this isn't what Mike was after all along

He likes over the knee spanking as punishment for two reasons: first, it has a demeaning, possessive overtone to it, which helps reestablish the Dom/sub dynamic, and second, it keeps the sub close to his body, so he can physically express control over them. It doesn't turn him on, per se, but feeling a sub cry and cling to his chest after is a bit of a rush. Punishment is a crucial part of D/s relationships. Harvey doesn't like to include it terribly often, which is why he discourages disobedience, however, it engenders a closeness that isn't found in other D/s acts. To surrender to being hand-fed and fucked is not exactly a hardship. But to surrender to having pain inflicted upon you to modify your behavior requires a much higher level of trust and dedication, and, if done correctly, can lead to a stronger bond. And Harvey does everything correctly. For the most part.

Mike jumps as the first strike hits him. This isn't intended to be a fun spanking. Harvey doesn't do those. This is punishment, pure and simple, and he will make it hurt as much as he thinks necessary. Mike tenses at first, but Harvey can see him visibly force himself to relax into the spanking, and a surge of affection hits Harvey.

Mike is submitting to his punishment. And sure, Harvey knows that technically it's because his paycheck depends upon it, but Mike enjoys being submissive far, far more than he thinks he does, and Harvey had become certain relatively quickly that Mike would happily do this without the money, but really, he has no problem giving it. It means nothing to him and everything to Mike. Besides, one day he knows he'll see Mike go to college, and he'll need that money then. At least if Harvey has anything to say about it.

His hand is on fire, but he doesn't let up. This needs to stick. Harvey truly doesn't want to do this more than once. He dislikes hurting his sub. Aggressiveness is something he wants to leave at Pearson-Hardman. Scotty called it. He wants a loving, affectionate pet. He doesn't want a relationship that regularly encourages causing this level of pain, which was something she wanted a great deal. He just couldn't do it. He didn't like harming her. It made him uncomfortable on a fundamental level. Sadism just isn't his thing. Work notwithstanding.

Mike's making pained sounds, tears leaking from clenched eyes. He looks a little lost, though Harvey can't figure out exactly why. Mike's ass is thoroughly red at this point, and bruises are starting to form. Harvey stops.

Mike's gasping, distressed noises are loud in the sudden silence. Harvey doesn't exactly enjoy them, but they feel appropriate in the moment. The affection he began to feel when Mike first submitted swells, and he tries to pull him up, but Mike whimpers and curls into Harvey. It hits him deep in his chest, and he realizes that this was most likely a very successful punishment.

“Okay,” Harvey murmurs, slight amusement lacing his voice. “Suit yourself.”

Mike stays there, panting, for quite a while. It's more than a little cathartic for Harvey as well. Doms can need aftercare just as much as most subs do.

Harvey strokes Mike's hair, holding his body in place, watching as his breathing slows.

“M'sorry,” Mike mumbles, sounding very, very sorry indeed.

“Accepted.” Harvey hopes Mike can understand how meaningful this was for their relationship. “You went somewhere else, for just a little while," he adds with curiosity.

Mike stays curled into him. “Bad memories.”

Oh, shit. Shit. Shit shit shit, what the hell had he been thinking? He should have checked and made sure specifically that Mike was okay with this form of punishment. He curses himself for getting way too into the moment to check for full consent.

“Did...” Fuck, what if he had just totally screwed this up? “Is there anything I did that you need me not to do again?”

“No. It's...no. It wasn't as bad as I had imagined, actually." Harvey calms.

“Are you telling me to spank you harder?” he asks with a smirk, not allowing any uncertainty to leak out.

“No, actually...” Mike shifts, fresh pain crossing his face as his ass slides against Harvey's jeans. “Christ, can we--”

Harvey moves wordlessly to the end of the couch, leaving a space between his legs. Mike looks almost giddy as he snuggles in against Harvey's chest. Harvey's fingers return to Mike's scalp.

Without any prompting, Mike says, “You've been so good to me. I think...I mean...it wasn't on purpose, but I think I needed to know. What would happen. What you'd do.”

So pretty much exactly what Harvey had thought. He continues to stroke Mike's hair in contemplation.

"I think that's understandable.” It really is. He'd never had the remotest desire to sub, but he could imagine wanting to push back against a Dom, a challenge, as it were. Mike wanted Harvey to control him on a deeper level, which was actually a really good thing for their relationship. “And now you know. Don't test me that way again."

“I won't,” Mike mumbles into his shirt, and Harvey can almost feel how far Mike has slipped into his submission. Fuck, it really is heady. "God, how do you hit that hard?” Mike asks, voice slightly more normal. “I'm lucky I don't have a shift tomorrow. I bet I can't ride my bike for a week."

Harvey's smirk returns. "Deterrent against stupidity. If you can't leave the apartment, you can't get in trouble." He's only half joking. "Speaking of, tomorrow's Friday. I'm going to work remotely...I want you here all day."

"Ok. You have me."

Harvey curls a hand over Mike's wrist possessively. “I know. That's how I like it."