Work Text:
“Mexico.”
“No.”
“Vegas?”
“As soon as I take up stripping.”
“…so –”
“No.”
“It’s too bad; you look good in sequins.”
“Well, should four years of higher education prove not to be the entry into finer society that I so dearly hope, I’ll keep that in mind.”
“So not Vegas?”
“Branson, Missouri.”
“To make Neptune look exciting by comparison?”
“World’s Largest Ball of Twine!”
“–”
“I don’t think you heard me: World’s Largest Ball of Twine.”
“So if we don’t die of boredom, we’ll have plenty of material to hang ourselves.”
“Fine. Grand Canyon?”
“Skydiving?”
“Broken legs.”
“There’s that sense of adventure I know and love.”
“I prefer my adrenaline rushes in other ways.”
“Less law-abiding ways.”
“Debatable.”
“Tell that to your file in the Sheriff’s office.”
“Hey, no one’s ever pressed charges.”
“Yet.”
“Cheers to that.”
“Yellowstone?”
“Buffalos, bears, wolves!”
“Oh my!”
“Camping?”
“I was thinking a suite at the lodge. I’m sure there’s a nice spa.”
“Well, you know how I must have a mud wrap every three days or I turn into a bat.”
“So that’s where Dracula went wrong.”
“Not nearly enough hot-stone massages.”
“Canada?”
“The whole country?”
“I’m sure we could choose just a part of it.”
“I think the Mounties are more stringent than the Tijuana police.”
“What are you suggesting?”
“I’m suggesting that you might get kicked out of Canada for life if you treat it the way you usually treat foreign countries.”
“Mexico’s hardly a foreign country.”
“My point exactly.”
“Hawaii.”
“Stretching the concept of the road trip a bit far with that one.”
“Don’t we know someone with a private jet? Surely that counts.”
“You might, and no.”
“Fine, I’m tapped. There are not nearly enough interesting places in this world reachable by car.”
“I’m sure the world is very disappointed to hear that.”
“Well it should think about that next time it decides to be so boring.”
“You know what we could do?”
“If you suggest Disneyland I’m leaving.”
“We could just stay in your suite.”
“Doesn’t really involve a road.”
“I’m willing to make an exception.”