BeautifulBurger
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Summary
Hanzo Shimada regrets ever joining Overwatch after he is paired with Jesse McCree, known cowboy enthusiast, and dropped off in the middle of American suburbia. Forced to blend in with the environment, endure neighborhood cookouts, and share his new living space with his so-called 'Husband', the two prepare to preform the ultimate sting operation: taking down the Vishkar corporation once and for all. He can't help but think this will all go horribly wrong.
Or, alternatively titled: the undercover fake-marriage fic that every fandom deserves.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 75,467
- Chapters:
- 8/8
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 920
- Kudos:
- 6,938
- Bookmarks:
- 1,565
- Hits:
- 116,501
Bookmarked by BeautifulBurger
07 Jul 2026
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Dennis Whitaker tried to find answers in God. When that didn't work, he turned to medicine.
And when that didn't work, he turned to the two married attendings.
Or I heard we were making Dennis Whitaker have religious trauma and I decided to help out.
Series
- Part 1 of i retract and repent in dust and ashes
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 201,262
- Chapters:
- 35/35
- Comments:
- 2,659
- Kudos:
- 9,272
- Bookmarks:
- 2,630
- Hits:
- 276,001
Bookmarked by BeautifulBurger
21 Mar 2026
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There are cops in the ED when Dennis arrives for his shift.
Not necessarily unusual, sure, but he could've done without the unwelcome news that there's a knife-wielding maniac on the loose in their immediate vicinity.
Figures this would happen on a Monday.
---------------------------------------------
Or
Dennis gets stabbed
Series
- Part 2 of Physician's Desk Reference
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 21,548
- Chapters:
- 3/3
- Collections:
- 7
- Comments:
- 754
- Kudos:
- 14,826
- Bookmarks:
- 3,130
- Hits:
- 165,807
Bookmarked by BeautifulBurger
19 Mar 2026
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When Whitaker accidentally sends a dick pic to Dr. Robby, he never thought it would end like this.
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The ED team shuffles out, Whitaker and Dr. Robby taking up the rear. Dr. Robby stops him with a hand on Whitaker’s waist, there and gone. “Really,” he says low, directly into his ear, beard scratching his cartilage, “that was amazing. You didn’t waste any time starting compressions. That probably saved that baby’s life. You saved that baby’s life.”
The praise goes to his head, suffusing him with endorphins. “Thank you, Dad.” And he promptly wants to crawl out of his skin and slither down the drain with the after birth slop.
Series
- Part 1 of joshua 1:9
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 24,437
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 10
- Comments:
- 976
- Kudos:
- 16,162
- Bookmarks:
- 3,248
- Hits:
- 162,818
Bookmarked by BeautifulBurger
14 Oct 2025
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“Please don’t tell me the first person who ever touched your dick was Dr. Robby.”
“Um.” He coughs.
“Oh my god I’m gonna fucking die.”
Santos tries to solve Whitaker’s sexual hangups. Whitaker tries to save Robby’s soul. Neither initiative goes exactly to plan.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 21,400
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 848
- Kudos:
- 16,522
- Bookmarks:
- 3,178
- Hits:
- 186,328
Bookmarked by BeautifulBurger
13 Oct 2025