Benthifer
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Summary
“This,” Ron says slowly, “might one of your worst ideas ever. Top ten.”
Harry lies to the Bulgarian Minister. Of course, he's going to rope Hermione into this.
Bookmarked by Benthifer
14 Jun 2026
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Summary
An alternate version of the perfume and snatchers scene from the movie.
Ron thought he saw something between Harry and Hermione that night. Ron follows the pair and overhears what he'd hoped wasn't true.
Series
- Part 1 of Hermione's Perfume
Bookmarked by Benthifer
05 Jun 2026
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Summary
Hermione Granger met Harry Potter when she was in Year 5 at Swinwearte Primary School. He was the new boy with the wild black hair and the gap-toothed grin who made his friend laugh and carried a sketchbook everywhere. She noticed him. She didn't think he noticed her back.
But Harry did notice. He always had.
Year after year, he built a life around her—holding the bus seat, staying on past his stop, walking her to the corner of Maple and Oak, stepping into her world without asking permission. Hermione experienced it all without naming it. She noticed. She filed it away. She told herself they were friends.
They were friends.
Just friends who ended up at the same university. Friends who wrote letters and met for dinner and walked through bookshops on rainy afternoons. Friends who taught each other things that probably weren't just friendly. Friends everyone else seemed to think belonged to each other.
Hermione knew better.
Or did she?
A Muggle AU spanning primary school through graduate school. Initially planned as a one-shot, but I'm not going to meet the deadline if I don't post right.this.minute. as a multi-chapter fic!
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 74,202
- Chapters:
- 15/17
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 132
- Kudos:
- 155
- Bookmarks:
- 45
- Hits:
- 4,448
Bookmarked by Benthifer
23 May 2026
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Summary
Their friends have tried every trope in the book: only one bed, forced proximity, childhood friends, mutual pining, even co-parenting Crookshanks. But despite living half their lives entangled, Harry and Hermione remain firmly un-romantic.
Until Lavender Weasley suggests the last resort: fake marriage.
Now, tricked into attending a couples-only tropical retreat, complete with enchanted hot tubs, intimacy rituals, and enough sensual food play to make a house-elf blush, Harry and Hermione will have to keep up the act. Or possibly stop pretending altogether.
Written for the Harmony Out of the Ordinary Fest, this is a trope-twisting, resort-core love story about crossing the line between best friends and soulmates… with the help of edible shower gel.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 15,258
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 70
- Kudos:
- 393
- Bookmarks:
- 91
- Hits:
- 4,614
Bookmarked by Benthifer
25 Apr 2026
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Summary
Harry’s in full-blown confessional mode—bringing Hermione breakfast in bed, trailing her through the Ministry like a very attentive shadow, and complimenting her elbows with alarming sincerity. She’s certain he’s been accidentally dosed with the same potion that has Draco Malfoy composing haiku for Theo Nott.
Harry insists he’s just ready to be honest.
What’s real? And what happens if it doesn’t wear off?Written as part of HMS Harmony's A Fool's Fest. Prompt "Strange What Desires Can Make Foolish People Do" with apologies to Master William Shakespeare on the occasion of his 461st birthday (or as near as we can tell.)
Series
- Part 5 of Tell Me a Story But True
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 5,640
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 24
- Kudos:
- 262
- Bookmarks:
- 63
- Hits:
- 2,812
Bookmarked by Benthifer
24 Apr 2026