Characterassassination
Fandoms
- Schitt's Creek (71)
Recent works
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Summary
Hey friends! Let's embarrass Patrick via some technology bloopers, shall we?
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Just a little texting convo between our boys when Patrick is away. David is a bit dramatic and ridiculous. Patrick loves it....once he figures out what's going on.
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Drabbles and Double Drabbles featuring prompts offered to me over on Tumblr.
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David and Patrick have been watching the Olympics and they have a little disagreement about the validity of one of the events.
Series
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Are You Picking Up What I'm Putting Down? by Characterassassination for mallpretzles
Fandoms: Schitt's Creek
14 Feb 2026
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Summary
Patrick Brewer desperately wants to ask out his business partner. He just doesn't quite know how to do it. So, maybe he should just tease David instead ;)
A slight canon divergence starting at 'Friends and Family' where David realizes that Patrick fixed the lights and ending at 'Grad Night' where Patrick asks David out on a date....or did he?
Recent series
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The Internet Is A Breeding Ground For Freaks! by Characterassassination
Fandom Schitt's Creek
18 Feb 2026
Summary
Unrelated fics inspired by things I see on the internet that make me immediately think of SC.
- Words:
- 15,425
- Works:
- 13
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- Words:
- 27,300
- Works:
- 13
- Bookmarks:
- 1
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Summary
Patrick sometimes has a hard time with communication, with telling the truth....for various reasons. Let's explore that. These will be stand-alone works about Patrick getting caught in a lie that has to do with his relationship with David. Maybe he was trying to hide his crush? Maybe he wanted David to like him back? Maybe he wanted some alone time with his new boyfriend? Maybe he told lies to his parents so they wouldn't find out about his secret relationship...or that he's gay? We'll see where this takes us :)
- Words:
- 40,009
- Works:
- 12
- Bookmarks:
- 9
Recent bookmarks
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Summary
What if David and Patrick had the time and the privacy for David to give Patrick a full hickey?
Bookmarked by Characterassassination
31 Mar 2026
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- Words:
- 74,371
- Works:
- 10
- Bookmarks:
- 19
Bookmarked by Characterassassination
20 Dec 2025
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Summary
At the end of Season 4, Patrick decides to go home for the holidays and brings his boyfriend with him.
Series
- Part 3 of Follows You Back Home
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 14,888
- Chapters:
- 8/8
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 62
- Kudos:
- 65
- Bookmarks:
- 8
- Hits:
- 884
Bookmarked by Characterassassination
18 Dec 2025
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Series
Bookmarked by Characterassassination
23 Nov 2025
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Summary
Patrick isn't naturally good at dirty talk, but he's a persistent guy. He works at it.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,710
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 27
- Kudos:
- 578
- Bookmarks:
- 57
- Hits:
- 5,054
Bookmarked by Characterassassination
24 Oct 2025