Emaylfar
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Summary
After the war, Draco Malfoy seeks refuge from infamy in the Muggle world. A friendly Muggle couple takes him under their wing, but there’s a problem: they are intent on setting him up with their best friend, Hermione Granger.
Or, in which the Muggle friends Hermione Granger undoubtedly would have had will not take no for an answer.
Series
- Part 1 of The Meet Your Match Universe
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 121,611
- Chapters:
- 26/26
- Collections:
- 58
- Comments:
- 2,754
- Kudos:
- 22,111
- Bookmarks:
- 9,214
- Hits:
- 1,169,109
Bookmarked by Emaylfar
18 Jul 2026
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Summary
It’s been six months of forced marriage to Death Eater Draco Malfoy, and even despite the threat of Azkaban, Hermione still refuses to consummate and produce an heir. When her husband takes matters into his own hands, suddenly she needs to shag him to save her life… but after months of waiting for this moment, he’s not going to let her (get) off so easily.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 7,475
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 92
- Kudos:
- 624
- Bookmarks:
- 107
- Hits:
- 9,402
Bookmarked by Emaylfar
13 Jul 2026
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Summary
First Year Hermione Granger couldn't wait to send her beloved fairytale collection to her anonymous book exchange partner, complete with a lovingly written note. In return she's given a very rare potions journal and a note written on expensive stationery: I like this book because potions are interesting. Don’t feel too bad if I’m top of our class.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 5,699
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 6
- Comments:
- 132
- Kudos:
- 2,943
- Bookmarks:
- 682
- Hits:
- 48,556
Bookmarked by Emaylfar
06 Jul 2026
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Summary
“You want to take care of me?” he proffered around a sip of his whiskey. Malfoy patted his thigh and then nodded toward her. “Come on then, sweetheart. Come have a seat so you can take care of Daddy.”
Hermione’s teeth clenched together tightly. She was going to throttle Harry for his asinine ‘by whatever means necessary’ principle.
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Or: A game of Cat and Mouse where both parties think they are the cat and only one of them is correct.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 37,300
- Chapters:
- 5/5
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 360
- Kudos:
- 1,029
- Bookmarks:
- 265
- Hits:
- 19,640
Bookmarked by Emaylfar
02 Jul 2026
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Summary
Four Slytherins and a Gryffindor crammed into a Muggle apartment.
Sure, why not?Hermione runs a programme: take former Death Eaters who failed their court-mandated therapy and teach them how to function in the Muggle world.
It was meant to be educational.
It became... something else.This fic is roughly 80% chaos and 20% cute. Where the smut fits into that is between you and your conscience.
Pansy - socially lethal, beautifully dressed, a problem.
Theo - chaotic manchild or unsettling genius. Your pick.
Blaise - sexual deviant. No pick. You'll like him anyway.
Draco - arrogant, impressively incompetent and permanently attached to a baseball cap. Oh, and he wants Hermione. Bad.Don't read this if you're a normal, sane person.
Do read if you want to laugh and question your life choices at 3am.The only fic I'd recommend reading as a WIP—small doses.
Hermione developed a kink.
Draco developed feelings.
Theo found Muggle tech.
Nobody emerged from this experience unchanged.
You probably won't, either... not convinced that's a good thing.I spent two months immersed in this and started thinking in nothing but double entendres.
Good luck.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 46,124
- Chapters:
- 29/29
- Comments:
- 122
- Kudos:
- 325
- Bookmarks:
- 328
- Hits:
- 17,789
Bookmarked by Emaylfar
20 Jun 2026