IBetMyLeftFoot



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    “Shane…”

    “Who the fuck do you think you’re calling Shane?”

    “Sweetheart,” Ilya corrects, tilting his head down against Shane’s grip on his hair to try to catch his lips. “Please.”

    “I can do everything she can,” Shane says. “But you’ve been a bit too naughty today. I’m tying you up first.”

    “Oh, no,” Ilya says, voice going high and breathy. “That’s terrible.”

    Or - The jealous Shane/pathetic top Ilya fic where Shane makes Ilya beg for it

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    30 Mar 2026

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    “Come on,” Comeau says. “Are we all just supposed to pretend it's normal that you’re still playing house with Ilya Rozanov?”

    “Gil—” J.J. says, but Shane doesn’t want him to finish that sentence, to pull Comeau gently off the ledge he’s steering himself toward. Shane wants to push him, kicking and screaming, to make them say it to his fucking face. That after all this time, they still hate him for the heinous crime of falling in love.

    “We’ve been married for two years,” Shane says. “I’m not sure that qualifies as playing house. I mean, it’s longer than you were with your first wife, isn’t it?”

    Or: Shane reunites with his former teammates at J.J.'s bachelor party. He's finally ready to say (and maybe punch) his piece.

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    30 Mar 2026

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    Shane Hollander is the number two overall NHL draft pick and a newly minted Montreal Voyageur. He’s also laser focused on his goals: being the best by beating the best. For him, this means a continued rivalry with number one draft pick—and new Ottawa Centaur—Ilya Rozanov. But when a problem with Rozanov’s immigration paperwork threatens his future in the NHL, what does that mean for Shane’s own career? He can’t risk finding out…so they get married. Just for immigration. A fast, practical, mutually beneficial solution.

    No one will ever suspect, let alone find out, that the NHL’s greatest rivals are secretly married. And there’s certainly no risk of feelings getting involved. They have a game plan.

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    30 Mar 2026

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    Four times Ilya Rozanov reminded everyone exactly who the fuck they were dealing with (spoiler: still an asshole, still elite, still not going anywhere), and one time he didn’t have to be anything except soft.

    Or being out didn’t make him nicer. Being married didn’t make him softer. Being older didn’t make him weaker. And being a father? Well. That’t when things get complicated.

    (He’s really good at that last part. Don’t tell anyone.)

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    29 Mar 2026

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    In the early hours of Saturday, the Hockey world was ablaze with the news that Ilya Rozanov was dead. Killed in a tragic car accident leaving behind a slew of devastated fans and a grieving husband still reeling in shock.

    The news also came as an incredible shock to Ilya when he awoke that same day, hungover and bleary, but very much alive. 

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    29 Mar 2026