Melthekel



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    Shane gestured helplessly at the empty space Wyatt had just vacated. “Rozanov. What are you doing? This is for charity.”

    Sliding a heavy, matte-black credit card across the counter, Ilya didn’t even blink.

    “I know,” he murmured, his blue eyes dropping directly to Shane’s mouth. “I’m being generous.”

    When Shane Hollander is drafted into working the hospital’s Valentine’s Day kissing booth, he expects awkward kisses and a miserable afternoon.

    What he doesn’t expect is Ilya Rozanov buying every single ticket.

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    30 Jun 2026

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    Well over a decade after retirement the public knows Ilya as the picture perfect devoted husband and father. When he's announced as a presenter and commentator for the Olympics as hosted by Toronto one online joke reminds the general public how fucking insane he used to be. Everyone under 35 struggles to square the Ilya Rozanov-Hollander they know today with Ilya Rozanov of the 2010s, fuckboy supreme.

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    30 Jun 2026

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    Rather than give him the joint, Ilya takes it back between his own lips and sucks in a deep breath, the tip glowing as he does so. Then, before Shane can process it, he’s reaching up and sliding one large hand around the back of Shane’s neck, pulling him down so their lips meet.

    Shane gasps softly, and Ilya takes the opportunity to blow smoke into his open and waiting mouth.

    Oh, God. Are you there? It’s me, Shane Hollander. We’ve had our differences, but I think I’d like to convert for real this time. I’m ready. Open the pearly white gates. I’m coming up.

    Shane goes to a house party, gets high, then gets on his knees. bon appetite
    now a multi-chapter saga bc i couldn't help myself

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    29 May 2026

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    “My boyfriend thinks I’m an idiot,” Ilya says. "Well, not really but a bit, maybe.”

    “Your boyfriend?” Sandra, the queer studies professor sits down, hard.

    “Yes, he thinks it is not smart to say faggot in the locker room when you are locked in the closet and Russia has the keys.”

    Ilya had been talking about himself when he’d said it. Making a joke. Sailing a little close to the wind, sick of listening to the background hum of homophobic bullshit. But someone had been filming. The video went viral. The Raiders panicked under the terrible PR. Now he was here.

    Sent to Queer Studies 101 to appease twitter. Because he’d been cancelled. For being a homophobe. If was fucking ridiculous.

    He turns to the professor. “So, can you help me take on Putin and NHL at same time or I need more advanced class for this?”

    Plus Chapter 2 – Social media chapter. Once they've been outed, Ilya gets to demand an apology from twitter.

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    29 May 2026

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    The Hollander family gets caught in a severe storm while trying to reach the Boston Airport and tries to find a safe place.

    Or,

    Shane comes up with the idea of taking shelter at Ilya’s house.

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    29 May 2026