Merit



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    Forester (Admirals🔛🔝)
    So the true way to combat the Bisexual Russian Terminator isn’t with homophobia...
    It's actually with even more gay
    ...
    You're a goddamn genius.

    ----

    The NHL rookies have joined forces to strategize now that two of the greatest hockey players of all time are on the same team and Ilya Rozanov must suffer from the unintended consequences of making hockey more woke.

    Mainly, the way everyone keeps implying that they want to fuck his husband.

    or: a group of rookies unionize and employ chirping as a form of psychological torture against a one Ilya Grigoryevich Rozanov.

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    11 Jun 2026

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    They met regularly in between games, and when they didn’t meet, Ilya came back to the same boring documentary. “This is Shane Hollander’s fortress of solitude,” the TV announced and his dick already knew what it meant.

    He seemed to never get tired of watching how his muscles tensed around his thighs when he pushed his hips in the air, or how his toned arms looked fucking strong stretched like that. Ilya was sure Shane picked those boring ass clothes with nothing in his mind in particular, but fuck, that tight shorts looked so tiny on him–

    And there he was. Cumming again, like a teenager, watching Shane Hollander show his yoga skills for a lame documentary.

    or

    Ilya tests Shane's flexibility since he hasn't got the balls to tell him he would like to see him do yoga positions for him

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    11 Jun 2026

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    Shane is desperate, overwhelmed, trying to keep up. Ilya watches unimpressed

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    24 Apr 2026

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    “Jesus fuck,” Marley says, before he gets a look at Ilya's smug face and rolls his eyes. “At least tell me you didn't bite her back."

    He shakes his head, grinning. “She is most fussy,” he says. “No marks, Rozanov; no shoes in the house, asshole; stop picking me up and throwing me on my bed, I just made it, dickhead,” he mocks, before he gestures at his shoulder. “And then she rides me for three hours and bites me like a vampire. These things I must suffer through.”

    OR: Boston's got the Montreal Jane pattern basically locked down. The bite mark on Ilya's shoulder is new, though.

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    21 Apr 2026

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    Shane Hollander has chemistry with his new American linemate. Montreal fans are thrilled. Ilya Rozanov is not.

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    13 Apr 2026