Runt4President
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Harry discovers his fiance, Ginny, cheating on him in his own apartment. Instead of letting his life come crashing down, he becomes quickly entagled with a wild, mysterious, and frankly clinging man named Tom.
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Harry just wanted to relax on his day off. Getting blasted is good for his mental health, right?
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The important matter recovered by his followers was none other than the filthy, emaciated husk of his enemy, Harry Potter.
The boy who had mysteriously disappeared, supposedly died, twenty years ago thus leading to the demise of Voldemort’s opposition and the rise of his regime.Tom releases a sharp breath of shock. After all this time, he’s still reaping rewards from his successful coup d'etat. If he hadn’t already believed he was meant to govern over the wizarding world, the delicious sight of his humbled competition would convince him.
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Harry leaned hard against the back of his heels in a struggle to both fight and flee. He knew he was acting out of line, the baristas side-eyeing them, but at this rate he felt he had to die on the hill he chose if only to prove a point to the strange man. So he sets his jaw a bit and wills any power he might have behind his own piercing glare to make itself known.
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Coffee Shop meet cute with Tom Riddle and a hangry Harry Potter chasing after treacle tarts, but maybe the real sweet treat is the love they find along the way.
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Harry Potter doesn't have to be an Auror to know that gifts from his dear 'Aunt' Bellatrix come with horrific hidden curses. He just didn't expect a trip to a spa to be so fraught with hidden dangers.
Massively AU. Smut and worldbuilding. Please read the tags!
"I mean," Harry continued, forcing himself to stand straight and not fidget. "I'm not exactly clear on how this works. My Aunt arranged the portkey for me and her letter was… not exactly forthcoming with details. Your—" Coworker? Golem? "— receptionist mentioned something about a Sylvan package, but I missed what that entailed.""Of course," the man replied smoothly, taking a step closer and lowering his hands as he saw Harry relax. "I apologize for the confusion. The constructs who staff certain positions here are good at their jobs, but sometimes there's no replacement for a human touch." The corners of his eyes crinkled slightly as his smile broadened, the faint feathering lines the only sign that time had touched him. "My name is Tom. I'll be your spa attendant and your masseuse. It’s a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Potter."
- Language:
- English
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- 34,386
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- 1/1
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Bookmarked by Runt4President
14 Jan 2024
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Because it is his by TheOnceandFutureQueenofTarts for duplicity
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
27 Feb 2023
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He glanced over his shoulder and caught Tom staring intently at Harry’s… well, Tom’s arse.
“Tom.”
To his credit, Tom showed not an ounce of shame as he let his eyes drift up to meet Harry’s. “Yes, darling?”
“Were you just effectively checking yourself out?”
Or: One time, someone told Tom to go f*** himself. He took that to heart.
- Language:
- English
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- 2,090
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- 1/1
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Bookmarked by Runt4President
29 Dec 2023
Bookmarker's Notes
Fugly idiots with no taste will die having scrolled past this fic
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Following his father's unlikely arrest, ten-year-old Tom Riddle becomes a dark internet sensation.
If victim, Harry Potter, listened to his own father, he’d have left the reclusive boy in the past. But eight years later, a painful encounter leads Harry to reconsider Tom Riddle, and to reach a conclusion that's entirely his own.
Series
- Part 1 of The Gorefag Effect
- Language:
- English
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- 149,034
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- 13/17
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- 875
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- 1,471
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Bookmarked by Runt4President
23 Dec 2023
Bookmarker's Notes
Felt bad for laughing as I was being choked and edged by the plot.
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Arthur lies to a sorceress and gets slapped with a truth spell. Awkwardness ensues.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 8,957
- Chapters:
- 1/1
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- 16
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- 218
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Bookmarked by Runt4President
04 Jul 2023
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"A good man can be stupid and still be good, but a bad man must have brains."
-Maxim GorkyWill is a hitchhiker with questionable hobbies. Hannibal is a man who has questionable motives. When Hannibal drives by Will who just so happens to need a ride, things quickly take a turn from the questionable to the downright depraved.
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Based on the tumblr idea that Hannigrammers latched onto: "We’re not supposed to pick up hitch-hikers because they may be serial killers. However, serial killers often pick up and kill hitch-hikers. Therefore, has a serial killer ever picked up another serial killer and did they become best friends?"Series
- Part 1 of Hitchhiker's Guide to Murder