Surreal_Angela



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  1. Public Bookmark 23

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    Summary

    Sixth year. A game of Truth or Dare in Gryffindor Tower goes exactly where you’d expect when Firewhisky and Lavender Brown are involved. Hermione is tasked with an impossible dare: to seduce the most un-seducible man in the castle. She’s never backed down from an academic challenge, and she’s certainly not going to let Severus Snape be the first F she ever receives.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    32,697
    Chapters:
    11/?
    Comments:
    32
    Kudos:
    166
    Bookmarks:
    23
    Hits:
    1,618

    13 Jul 2026

  2. Public Bookmark 2

    Words:
    12,647
    Works:
    4
    Bookmarks:
    2

    29 Jun 2026

  3. Public Bookmark 82

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    Hermione Granger thought being the Hogwarts’ Matron would make her life quieter, until Severus Snape stormed back into it like a gothic fever dream with cheekbones sharp enough to file paperwork on.

    Enter Draco Malfoy: agent of chaos, self-appointed matchmaker, and menace to the entire staff table. With a talent for melodrama and his disastrously timed pelvic thrusts, he is determined to shove Hermione and Severus together whether they like it or not. (They don’t.... They definitely do. They’re both in denial.)

    With Hogwarts whispering, Harry approving, and Ron distracted by impending fatherhood, Hermione finds herself caught between attraction, irritation, and the unsettling suspicion that she might actually care about Snape.

    And as she becomes even more entangled in his life, one thing becomes obvious:
    They’re either going to kiss, kill each other, or collapse passionately into a bed, and nobody can decide which outcome is more likely.

    Draco, armed with his popcorn, is ready for it all.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    58,055
    Chapters:
    30/30
    Comments:
    292
    Kudos:
    553
    Bookmarks:
    82
    Hits:
    13,045

    26 Jun 2026

  4. Public Bookmark 34

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    Hermione was, unfortunately, quite accustomed to receiving dick pics with her regular owl post. But she’d never expected Severus Snape to send one, or that he'd be in possession of such a delightfully gorgeous cock. She can only hope he’ll equally enjoy her reply.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,461
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    47
    Kudos:
    302
    Bookmarks:
    34
    Hits:
    2,527

    04 May 2026

  5. Public Bookmark 25

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    Summary

    “Pillory of Pleasure?” she can barely bring herself to ask.

    “It captures-" Snape pauses- “witches in need of… release, and binds them until they find it."

    In the silence that follows – every molecule in her body cringing – Hermione thinks that it’s a cruel joke that both of them have, improbably, survived the war when, right now, she’d give a hundred horcruxes for a dark wizard to appear and hex her into oblivion.

    “Can’t you stop it?” she asks, desperately.

    “No, Miss Granger. This-" reverently stroking the wood of the frame- “is old magic.”

    Hermione’s read enough of the Restricted Section of the library to know that that means blood or sex. And, with the way her luck seems to be going this evening, it won’t be the former.

    Hermione finds herself in a magical bind. One that only Severus Snape's fingers can... release.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,854
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    14
    Kudos:
    291
    Bookmarks:
    25
    Hits:
    3,942

    13 Apr 2026