TheQueenoftheAbyss
Fandoms
Recent works
-
Slightly different Yet just the same by TheQueenoftheAbyss
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
15 Jul 2026
Tags
Summary
“You like it here?” Rosanov asked after a few more moments of silence.
Shane looked over at him, but Rozanov was still facing away. “What, Saskatchewan?"
The Russian laughed, it was a bright and brilliant sound. “No, this place is shithole. Canada.”
-
Shane Hollander spends five years of his life living in Japan, helping his Mother care for his sick Grandmother. It changes who he is, who he would have been, and shapes his life and career. Shane still finds hockey, he will in every universe, and where Shane Hollander plays hockey Ilya Rozanov is never far behind. -
I understand now by TheQueenoftheAbyss
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types
21 Apr 2026
Tags
Summary
He knew what that meant. Knew the tip of the scales past their delicate balance, from 'passive' to 'active'. He had never in his life felt this before, not this clearly, not so defined in his very being. Ilya had thought he had understood, before, what his mother had done and what had led her to it. He knew now, staring out through the glow of the house to the dark garden, that he had not.
~
Ilya begins to experience active suicidal ideation for the first time. When he crashes Shane helps, he always does, but Ilya is hiding behind lies, and Shane cannot save him from what he cannot see. And Ilya won't ever let him see this, not as long as he can help it.!This fic contains description of suicidal thoughts/ideation including suicidal planning and graphic descriptions of the aftermath of suicide!
Series
- Part 1 of To understand (and be understood)
-
Like a Brother. by TheQueenoftheAbyss
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
13 Mar 2026
Tags
Summary
“Of course you’d defend the traitor fag-“
There was a distinct thud as Captain Hayden Pike’s fist connected with the underside of the chin of one of his own players.
Everything descended into chaos.
-
Pike and Hollander have been ride or die since day one, no amount of decade long secrets or team transfers could change that.
That is an unfortunate fact for the Montreal Voyageurs. -
The bitter cold by TheQueenoftheAbyss
Fandoms: Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Heated Rivalry (TV)
08 Jan 2026
Tags
Summary
Shane Hollander is young, fit and healthy, he works out, he plays hockey, he eats a ridiculously healthy diet.
Shane Hollander dies on the ice at age 30.
-
Shane’s body is cold. Ilya’s heart is cold. -
This Happens Sometimes by TheQueenoftheAbyss
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
04 Jan 2026
Tags
Summary
“I’m fine- this happens sometimes.”
“It shouldn’t.”
“Well it does.” Shane raised his voice slightly, “It has for as long as I can remember.” He took a deep breath and reminded himself that he couldn’t be angry at Hayden right now, he was trying to help.
~Hayden Pike has Shane's back from day one, on and off the ice. That includes when Shane has one hell of a panic attack at an awards dinner.
Part one of an exploration of Shane's anxiety in his relationships with others.
Recent series
-
To understand (and be understood) by TheQueenoftheAbyss
Fandom Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types, Heated Rivalry (TV)
21 Apr 2026
- Words:
- 9,285
- Works:
- 1
- Bookmarks:
- 14
Recent bookmarks
-
You Don't Get to Be Efficient with Your Life by poppyjustmight for ancilla89
Fandoms: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Marvel, Iron Man (Movies), Spider-Man - All Media Types
17 Feb 2026
Tags
Summary
Peter makes a joke about dying in the car on the way home from a mission. It's the kind of thing he says all the time. Throwaway. Casual. Muscle memory.
Pepper doesn't laugh. She also doesn't take the exit for the Tower.
-
Tags
Summary
Here are some facts:
Six months ago, Ilya and Shane sat on Ilyas’ couch, in Boston, and said, we want to be more, even if it has to be in secret.
Four months ago, Ilya Rozanov and Shane Hollander bought new houses. If asked, they would both say it was a complete coincidence. They were not asked, because most people do not browse Zillow for fun in their free time (Shane-) and the real estate of hockey players was of very limited interest to even the most hardcore fan.
Two hours ago, Shane Hollander was bleeding out on the ice.
Yuna and David Hollander were at least three hours away, at the exact moment their son hit the ice. Yuna Hollander is a perceptive woman. If she enters the house, she will know her son does not live alone.
Here is the most important fact Ilya knows right now: Shane would not want to come out to his parents like this.
Ilya has one hour to wipe his existence from his boyfriends’ house.
Bookmarked by TheQueenoftheAbyss
15 Jul 2026
-
Tags
Summary
Ilya: He should buy lottery tickets because he is the luckiest man on earth
Ilya: He should get on his knees and thank god everyday that he got to fuck you
Shane: Oh my God stop
Ilya: What? I do thatOr: The man who topped Shane in Mexico posts about his experience, Ilya contemplates murder, and the other queer NHL players get caught in the crossfire.
Series
- Part 7 of the secret society of stick handlers
-
contingency plans by anincompletelist (soldouthaz)
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
18 Feb 2026
Tags
Summary
Shane's eyes squeeze closed again. “We had reason to put rules in place. Protocol. If ever—if it got to a place where, if he was ever feeling like he might—"
Hayden’s body understands before his mind catches up. His blood runs cold for a second, stuck on the scrunch of Shane’s face, the clench of his fist, how desperate he’d been to see Rozanov—Ilya—just now. To make sure that he was okay. Here, in person.
Not hurt. Alive.
“Oh,” Hayden hears himself say distantly. “Oh, fuck, Shane.”
--
or, Ilya needs a place to go, and Hayden's happens to be the closest. It turns out to be a good thing.
Series
- Part 1 of all lights turned off can be turned on
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 8,339
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 11
- Comments:
- 481
- Kudos:
- 18,956
- Bookmarks:
- 3,773
- Hits:
- 142,635
Bookmarked by TheQueenoftheAbyss
07 Mar 2026
-
Tags
Summary
But it’s true. David Hollander is normal about hockey. He has a life outside it. He goes to work at the Treasury. He goes on long walks. He volunteers at animal shelters. He puzzles. Well—he works on puzzles? Ilya still is not sure how the verbs work there.
The point is: David Hollander built a life outside of hockey that was fulfilling—that remains fulfilling. This, in its roundabout way, and though Ilya could never admit it, saves Ilya’s life.
-x-
or, a treatise on grief, depression, and chronic suicidality