cellostrings



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    “There you are,” Ilya murmured.
    Shane exhaled shakily through his nose. “I’m sorry.”
    “For what?”
    “For showing up like this.” Shane swallowed. “For being… weird.”
    Ilya frowned immediately, almost offended by the suggestion. He slid one hand higher along Shane’s thigh, grounding him there.
    “You got hurt,” he said softly. “Someone hit you very hard and your team lost and your brain is still running around in circles because you care too much about everything. Not weird.”
    Shane laughed quietly at that, though it cracked in the middle. “You make me sound exhausting.”
    “You are exhausting,” Ilya replied. “But I like exhausting.”

    OR

    After a CCM shoot that neither of them can forget, Shane and Ilya begin an anonymous email exchange that becomes more real than anything they’ve said face to face. Together they explore where communicating emotions gets you. When Ilya disappears, his emails stop—but Shane keeps writing. One year later they are forced to confront everything they left unsaid and unsent.

    Told through snippets of emails and intimate moments, they explore longing, learning how to be seen, and choosing someone—not just in the moment, but over and over, on purpose.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    70,900
    Chapters:
    17/25
    Comments:
    188
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    284
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    173
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    26 Jun 2026

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  2. Public Bookmark *

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    🌹"No questions. No feelings. Just because we want to."🌹

    Shane Hollander is a PhD student who knows how to stay invisible.
    Ilya Rozanov is Montreal’s most arrogant hockey star—brilliant, reckless, and incapable of following rules he didn't make himself.

    It should be easy to walk away.

    Instead, it becomes something quiet and hidden—late nights, closed doors, and a version of Ilya no one else gets to see. Shane carries his secrets inked beneath the roses winding across his skin, a constant reminder that some things survive only as long as they remain sub rosa.

    Ilya doesn’t do feelings.
    Shane was never meant for something like this.

    But he stays. And he falls anyway, caught between stolen moments and borrowed time.

    And when it finally falls apart, Ilya might realize too late what it means when there’s nothing left to hold onto—and that this time, love might not be enough to bring Shane back.

    (fake dating • secrecy • loving someone who was never going to choose you • happy ending, I promise 💔➡️❤️ • 🔥🔥🔥)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    112,406
    Chapters:
    32/32
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    1,659
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    17 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

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  3. Public Bookmark *

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    “But we have always kissed, we -”

    “I know.” Shane says, face blushing crimson. “But like I said, I don’t want to do that anymore. We can still see each other, because I like what we do, but we have to keep that part out of it. Please.”

    Ilya breathes in and out. He tries to be rational. Shane’s requesting that something change in their arrangement. It should be a simple answer. Yes. Of course. If that’s a boundary he wants to set, then Ilya should obey it.

    But the feeling of loss is so overwhelming he can barely stomach it.

    or, after Vegas, Shane doesn't let Ilya kiss him anymore when they hook up. Ilya doesn't take it very well.

    Language:
    English
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    16,671
    Chapters:
    3/3
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    188
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    2,489
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    576
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    03 Jun 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    “You are planning to rob me or what?” He hears Rozanov call, and he can’t help but smile slightly even as he rolls his eyes, closing the door to the linen closet and feeling strangely lighter than when he opened it, reassured that he’s just trying to read into a blank page, that today doesn’t mean anything more than Rozanov doesn’t mind him being around, which is strangely flattering.

    “I don’t know,” he calls back. “Don’t Russians like diamonds and fur and stuff? Where should I start looking if I want to know what my options are?”

    He hears Rozanov laugh, and it makes him smile.

    When he joins him in the living room once more, Rozanov tugs him down to lean against him again. Shane goes easier this time, settling into it, knowing it doesn’t mean anything other than the fact that he just happens to be the closest warm body, the person on Rozanov’s roster who filled today’s slot.

    (the tuna meltdown doesn't happen) (this does not mean they get ANY better at communication)

    (or: how shane didn't realize he had a boyfriend for several months)

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    23,094
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    1/1
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    02 Jun 2026

  5. Public Bookmark 69

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    “Surely,” he starts “surely you must know that it was all for you.”

    Shane’s breath catches in his throat but he remains frozen in place.

    “You made me hope, which I had scarcely had the courage to do before, that maybe I did not have to succumb to their cruelty. That something else was worth living for. I’m not losing anything, Shane. I’m choosing.”

    (ie. my regency era au that is really just a reason to have ilya walk through fog like mr. darcy)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,855
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    15
    Kudos:
    284
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    69
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    4,598

    26 May 2026