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  1. Public Bookmark 40

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    Summary

    Something inside Gyuvin breaks when he thinks about Ricky — the best friend who has wiped vomit from his mouth, rubbed his back when he’s cried and held him whenever Gyuvin needed it — looking at him and asking the loaded question of why he’s being treated this way. Ricky, who knows this isn’t deserved, and Gyuvin, who agrees but can’t answer. If he wasn’t still reverberating with residual, misplaced anger, he would crumple in on himself and cry. His muscles are simply too rigid.

    AKA: A story in which Ricky takes dick and Gyuvin doesn't take it well.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,742
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    12
    Kudos:
    278
    Bookmarks:
    40
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    3,749

    07 Jul 2026

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    Bookmarker's Notes

    genuinely thought i hallucinated this fic thank god i found it again

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    What Ricky knows: The way he wants Hao is a feeling he can’t domesticate, clawing at his insides like a rabid animal. It’s love, and that's worship. It's desire, and that's a sin.

    What Ricky doesn’t know: Gyuvin burns just to keep him warm.

    Or; Hao shines bright enough that it blinds Ricky to anything and anyone else, including Gyuvin.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    29,988
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    58
    Kudos:
    477
    Bookmarks:
    115
    Hits:
    6,928

    03 Jul 2026

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    Bookmarker's Notes
    • Soon, he'll be driving back to Seoul. It's the city where he met Hao. The city where Ricky left his heart. The city where Gyuvin stayed. The city where it all started.

    the way it's intentionally written so that it applies to either hao or gyuvin AND both of them at the same time. absolute bars.

  3. Gyuvin’s always been like this, throwing around love like a hello. As much as he means it, he loves so easily that Ricky feels like it means less anyway.

  4. this is such a good line for characterization—the way you can feel immediately what kind of person gyuvin is and what kind of person ricky is from this one line alone, especially in the casual cruelty of it. incredible work.

  5. His mother tongue doesn’t feel as intimate as it did before, and Ricky suddenly understands that he’s forgotten that Chinese was never really their secret language at all, just something they shared with a billion other people.

  6. absolutely obsessed with the way their shared language is incorporated into the narrative. it was so smart to write them sharing a native language as something that ricky saw as special and intimate, and when this line hit the delayed gratification was SO perfect. the fact that mandarin is the language with the most native speakers in the world is so well utilized here to emphasize the one-sided nature of ricky's feelings and the way he'd projected them onto hao. what a smart way to utilize their shared culture for the narrative.

  7. Ricky’s still sorting through the rubble of it all, but Gyuvin loves like a lighthouse that never goes out, a steady ray of light that cuts through the storm. He loves like he never plans to stop, the picture of abundance, and Ricky thinks that his new framework of love can’t exist without Gyuvin in it.

  8. i loveee the imagery of this.

  9. Gyuvin’s looking at him again, and Ricky wonders how often he did this while he was looking away.

  10. something something because every time you looked at him, I was looking at you

    just bar after bar after barrrr. the characterization was a masterclass, the way ricky's feelings for hao were always rooted in his admiration and desire to emulate what hao represented: someone older and wiser and braver and more sure of himself. it's also why he can't see gyuvin, because gyuvin isn't someone he can aspire to. they're the same age, and gyuvin isn't someone who goes against the mould of the expectations of the church the way hao does. that feeling of looking up to and crushing on an older friend who seems so much cooler and more put together and perfect is captured sooo well here. (“Because he’s cool, I guess. Unlike you.”) ricky's idolization of hao is so well-written, the way he describes hao is always very surface-level and it never feels deep or authentic, and even the fact that the mystery is part of the allure comes across so clearly that hao never feels attainable in ricky's own narration. the scene where he finds hao's box of memories was soo effective for this—it's both ricky and the reader's first time seeing hao's life, and while ricky is a part of it, he's but a small part compared to hanbin, who is both represented as the major significance in hao's life and as someone who actually knows hao in a way ricky doesn't, because hanbin was the one that was actually been sharing that life with hao. also loveddd the direct parallel between ricky and his mother, super effective for characterization and does such a good job in terms of symbolism and foreshadowing. love the way ricky's stubbornness really comes through, he feels so human in his flaws and vices. this really feels like a coming-of-age movie in the best ways and the characterization was PEAK.

    i thought it was such a great bit of writing that ricky's blindness to everyone but hao was built into the narrative itself. when reading the story, you're always aware that gyuvin is there in the background—he's the first non-family character to get referenced and he consistently has a presence in ricky's narration in the form of seemingly-background life story anecdotes—but he's also consistently afforded a lot less detail and focus especially compared to zhang hao. he's always there but his presence and impact feels so muted that he kinda blends with other background characters especially in the first arc and that's just such a smart way to show the way ricky views him versus hao, especially when you consider that gyuvin's always there during the important moments: the departure from seoul, the exhibition, ricky's show. it was just such a smart way of showing how gyuvin has always been there for ricky in a way hao hasn't, and yet ricky never saw it because he was too busy focusing on hao. absolutely fantastic work.

  11. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    “You could get away easily with all my money, you know, there’s a million reasons for a divorce.” Ricky explains.

    “Such as?”

    “Religious differences, extramarital affairs, inability to consummate the marriage.”

    Gyuvin eyebrows raise and his mouth quirks into an annoying smirk, “Oh, but we definitely consummated the marriage.”

    Or: All it takes is one wild, drunken Christmas Eve night to completely derail Ricky's carefully curated life.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    47,532
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    112
    Kudos:
    1,028
    Bookmarks:
    237
    Hits:
    13,536

    03 Jul 2026

    Bookmarker's Tags:
    Bookmarker's Notes

    such a quintessential classic romcom and flawlessly executed, what more could you want

  12. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    “Break up vacation. C’mon, baby,” Ricky had simpered in that horribly annoying tone of his. “You deserve to let off some steam after losing the dead weight, and I need a tan and someone to keep me company.”

    “You’re paying,” Gyuvin said, giving into the firm press of Ricky’s thumbs working against his traps.

    “Of course. Daddy always takes care of you.”

    Ricky got hit after that, but they also booked their vacation. A full week, right after Christmas. New Years on a beach instead of knee deep in snow, Gyuvin could never say no to that. He can never say no to Ricky, period.

    (OR: Gyuvin goes on vacation and all he gets is gayer (and heatstroke!))

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    17,643
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    57
    Kudos:
    1,644
    Bookmarks:
    346
    Hits:
    17,526

    02 Jul 2026

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  13. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    The manager sighs, already tired of him. “Gyuvin. You are an alpha. Ricky is a beta. When you put your hands on him like this in an airport, people don’t read it as member skinship.”

    Gyuvin frowns. “They think I’m bullying him?”

    “They think a lot of things,” she says. “Some of them think you’re fighting. Some of them think you’re dating. Some of them think you’re doing alpha fanservice with a beta member, which I should not have to explain is a terrible idea. And some of them–”

    “And some of them what?” Gyuvin asks.

    The manager closes the tablet case. “Some of them are asking why you act like you know something they don’t.”

    Ricky is a beta. Gyuvin doesn't treat him like one.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    38,682
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    49
    Kudos:
    662
    Bookmarks:
    166
    Hits:
    8,732

    30 Jun 2026

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