cumberbatcha



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    @IlyaRozanovOfficial✅ Happy to announce that I WILL be pounding Shane Hollander tonight! That ass is MINE!

    @CliffMarleau✅Brother, please ask me before you post shit like this.

    @BostonWAGOneDay pounding him into… the boards… right? RIGHT?

    @HollanderBabe24 in my dreams 🙏🙏🙏

    @HockeyFan81 PLEASE have someone proof-read this man’s Tweets.

    @IllyaRozanovOfficial✅ what is ‘proof-read’? Internet tells me this mean
    fix errors. What error? I said what I said.

    @HockeyFan81 I’M SCREAMING

    OR: Instead of just hooking up at the CCM shoot, Shane and Ilya start a serious relationship the summer before their rookie season. They are not public about their relationship, but Ilya sees no reason to lie when people ask him what he thinks of his biggest rival. Maybe it’s the Russian accent, though, because for some reason, everyone thinks he's joking.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    17,328
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Comments:
    650
    Kudos:
    7,562
    Bookmarks:
    1,744
    Hits:
    89,965

    05 Jul 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    In 2009, Ilya Rozanov won his first World Figure Skating title. That same year, Shane Hollander was selected first overall by the Boston Raiders.

    In 2014, both are chosen to represent their countries in the Sochi Olympics.

    A lot can change in two weeks.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    52,029
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Comments:
    132
    Kudos:
    453
    Bookmarks:
    119
    Hits:
    6,069

    04 Jul 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    June 2010. Ilya Rozanov is delayed after the CCM shoot. By the time he gets to the locker room, Shane Hollander is out of the showers and Ilya’s entire plan is ruined.
    Only not quite fully ruined. Hollander invites him to dinner with his parents as a thank you for arranging the shoot and Ilya, in a burst of insanity, agrees. He hits it off with Yuna and David. They all exchange numbers. He and Hollander become friends.
    At no point does Ilya stop wanting more from him.

    June 2016. Ilya Rozanov is a superstar. A Cup winner. An MVP. Women want him, men want to be him. He’s fucking miserable.
    He’s in love with his best friend. He can’t deny it anymore. Only now Shane is dating a movie star and happier than Ilya’s ever seen him. Ilya can’t ruin that for him, can’t ruin their friendship by asking for what he knows Shane can’t give. No matter how much it kills him.

    A charity event in San Francisco. A catastrophic computer failure. A fateful decision to drive, not fly. Two days in a car, just the two of them. Alone. Together.
    Ilya’s sick with excitement and with dread, because how can he keep his secrets with Shane so close for so long?

    What he doesn’t know is that Shane has secrets too.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    33,800
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Comments:
    796
    Kudos:
    5,175
    Bookmarks:
    1,658
    Hits:
    58,438

    03 Jul 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    After two years of playing as Centaurs together and their almost stanley cup win, Hollanov sits down to take a look at their career, from now all the way to 2008.

    Maybe they reveal a little more that people thought because I am sorry did I hallucinate or did they just say they talked/pseudo flirted ever since 2008 and what do you mean they hooked up before they ever played a single NHL game ????

    or: Hollanov do a video series inspired by the vogues "life in looks" and maybe break the internet

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    44,869
    Chapters:
    24/24
    Comments:
    403
    Kudos:
    2,463
    Bookmarks:
    566
    Hits:
    58,931

    28 Jun 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    This thing that they have—whatever the hell it is—it’s good. It’s easy. It feels like the only thing keeping Ilya afloat sometimes.

    He can’t let it get to a place where it’s more than just a good, convenient fuck and some fun teasing in between. Even if sometimes, in brief moments of tenderness, it already feels like it’s more than that. Or at least like it’s something that can be, if they just let it.

    But they don’t. They can’t.

    Although sometimes, Ilya does find himself giving in to the urge to look at Shane just a little bit longer, to let his touch be just a little bit gentler, more reverent, than what it would be for something as casual as they claim this to be—albeit sparingly.

    Sometimes, just for a moment, he lets himself indulge. He lets some of that affection bleed out of him because he feels like he’ll implode if he doesn’t.

    But he always catches himself before it can linger.

    ***

    or

    where six months of ghosting is shane’s final straw and he cuts contact with ilya after vegas, tired of the wall that just keeps getting higher each time he tries to chip away at it

    so ilya is forced to reckon with his feelings much sooner

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    43,487
    Chapters:
    8/8
    Comments:
    408
    Kudos:
    2,263
    Bookmarks:
    806
    Hits:
    56,524

    27 Jun 2026