godbinder



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  1. Public Bookmark *

    Summary

    A series of Ilya and Shane struggling to get people to take their relationship reveals very seriously at all.

    The fics in this series are set in the same universe, so these are the SAME Shane and Ilya. Although they can be read in any order, Totally Real Canadian Boyfriend™️ takes place roughly 5 years before Pour Decisions.

    Words:
    24,758
    Works:
    2
    Bookmarks:
    756

    08 Jul 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    After the tuna melt meltdown, Shane meets Rose Landry, has several deeply inconvenient revelations, and decides to do the only sensible thing: win Ilya back with sincerity, logistics, and a frankly alarming amount of emotional effort.

    Ilya, meanwhile, mistakes every tender gesture for the kind prelude to an inevitable goodbye.

    Or: Shane is living in a romcom. Ilya is living in a Russian tragedy.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    75,309
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Comments:
    2,753
    Kudos:
    15,921
    Bookmarks:
    5,832
    Hits:
    302,831

    27 Jun 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    “We do not say anything about the Hollander situation,” LeClaire tells them even though it sounds like he’s already resigned to what he knows is going to happen.

    After all, Roz gets extremely mad whenever it’s brought up. Not that Cliff can blame him, he’s pretty sure that Roz liked Hollander before this (wouldn’t chirp him half as much if he didn’t). Finding out that he’s such a bastard must sting.

    Not to mention that Roz does not mess around with people that disrespect girls. Or women. Or kids. Or dogs. Or the elderly (excluding Scott Hunter). Or really anyone, if it’s for petty stupid reasons.

    “Of course,” Cliff agrees for both of them since Roz is still too busy texting someone.

    It’s apparently not good enough for LeClaire because he asks, “Roz?”

    “Just one second,” he answers without raising his eyes from his phone or stopping his typing. “Need to get my Jane to agree with something. She’s very stubborn.”

     

    Or. My take on the 'their text leak and now everybody thinks that Shane is an abusive bastard' premise. Featuring Ilya giving a presser, Marly realizing in real time who 'Jane' is and the internet reacting to the craziness.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    24,602
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Comments:
    1,174
    Kudos:
    14,035
    Bookmarks:
    3,052
    Hits:
    161,838

    26 Jun 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

    Words:
    310,739
    Works:
    4
    Bookmarks:
    1,954

    26 Jun 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Ilya Rozanov is in love, closeted, catastrophically lonely, and apparently incapable of referring to Shane Hollander in present tense.

    The Centaurs come to a- given the circumstances- reasonable conclusion.

    Or:
    Five times the Centaurs thought Ilya Rozanov was mourning his dead wife, and the one time they discovered his wife was actually Shane Hollander.
    Shane, for the record, is alive and really confused.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    31,290
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Comments:
    1,515
    Kudos:
    18,858
    Bookmarks:
    4,016
    Hits:
    224,793

    21 Jun 2026