melyx



Fandoms

  1. SKAM (Italy) (1)

Recent bookmarks

  1. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    “Is just the new routine, okay?” Ilya pleaded, his voice breaking. “The pills were working and now there is more stress so I just need to get used to it and will be fixed, okay?”

    “How bad is it?”

    “Shane, please.”

    “Ilya, you promised no more secrets, no more hiding. How bad?”

    He covered his face in his palms, his elbows resting on his knees, and took in a shuddered breath. “...bad.”

     

    OR

     

    After Ilya Rozanov and Shane Hollander get married, Ilya discovers that his depression won't magically disappear just because he finally has love and a real family. He gets to live and work with Shane full time now that they are on the Centaurs, but it's becomingly increasingly difficult to hide his deteriorating mental health from his husband. He's haunted by dreams of his mother and the fear that his depression and the hockey world's eruption about their relationship is ruining Shane's life. He has to swallow his pride and begin taking SSRIs, navigate the side effects of medicating his depression, and learn to accept love and support from those he loves most. Will the shame eat him alive or can he finally learn that he's worthy of love even at his lowest?

     

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    128,732
    Chapters:
    24/26
    Comments:
    596
    Kudos:
    1,521
    Bookmarks:
    673
    Hits:
    73,431

    01 May 2026

    Bookmarker's Tags:
  2. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Shane and Ilya broke up. It was the adult, mature decision they made together and moved on from. Except Shane is still Ilya's emergency contact and Ilya's coach just called.

    Ilya had a seizure. Well, seizures. Multiple. He is in the hospital, in the operation block and suddenly Shane is met with the possibility that last words Ilya Rozanov ever heard from him were "Maybe love isn't enough."

    And then complications occur. And Ilya is not waking up.

    ***

    They’d sat on a perfectly ordinary Wednesday afternoon in their perfectly ordinary kitchen, with coffee that had gone cold on the table between them, and calmly dismantled the life they’d built together. One sentence at a time.

    “Maybe we need space.” “Maybe we’re just hurting each other.” “Maybe love isn’t enough.”

    He wants to go back and shove that version of himself against the wall. Shake him until his teeth rattle.

    Love is the only thing that matters when someone is under general anaesthesia and a stranger is touching their brain, Shane thinks wildly. Love is literally the only currency worth anything in a room like this.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    20,239
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    518
    Kudos:
    12,156
    Bookmarks:
    3,078
    Hits:
    181,469

    20 May 2026

    Bookmarker's Tags:
  3. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Shrugging one shoulder far more casually than he possibly feels, Ilya says, “I like both. Is secret, okay?”

    “Okay,” Hollander says, voice cracking.

    He doesn’t say anything else. The air’s so heavy around them that it feels like being in the middle of a scrum, the weight and heat of all those bodies pressing down on you. Danger always feels like hockey; it’s the most dangerous thing Ilya knows, except for this. Everything dangerous in his life involves men’s bodies and just how close he can get to them. Closer than he probably should.

    A year after mysteriously dropping out of the 2009 draft, Shane Hollander is signed by the Boston Raiders, right behind Ilya Rozanov. Having the two biggest stars in the league on the same line is great for Boston — but playing alongside their worst rival was never exactly in Shane or Ilya's plans. Especially not when staying away from each other starts to feel just as impossible as getting along.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    222,222
    Chapters:
    28/28
    Comments:
    17,469
    Kudos:
    44,311
    Bookmarks:
    17,279
    Hits:
    2,015,049

    20 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Tags:
  4. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    “Well, you are getting something from me. Two things actually: Life-changing sex skills and an opportunity to fuck me—”

    “—Oh, give me a break—”

    “—But,” Ilya says. “What am I getting out of this?”

    “The opportunity to f-fuck me,” Hollander snaps, and yeah, a pretty fair point.

    ilya is failing a class, shane is failing at exploring his sexuality. despite their seven-year-long animosity on the ice, they turn to each other for guidance. a deal is struck.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    114,540
    Chapters:
    7/13
    Comments:
    1,597
    Kudos:
    9,183
    Bookmarks:
    4,127
    Hits:
    363,971

    01 Jun 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    “I’m a lucky fucking man.”
    “I’m the lucky one… getting to sit here and rub you. Sure, many people would be willing to fight me for this opportunity…”
    “Mmmh… No one could give a massage as good as yours.”

    or

    Sunday morning. No alarm, nowhere to be. Shane takes care of Ilya. Ilya takes care of Shane.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,257
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    69
    Kudos:
    905
    Bookmarks:
    252
    Hits:
    16,614

    23 May 2026