moonphrog
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“I’m, uh… sober,” Tweek announces because what the fuck else is he supposed to say to his ex-boyfriend that he ghosted 10 years ago to go do drugs?
Craig nods slowly. He wants to say congrats, or I’m proud of you, or how have you been sober for this fucking long and not contacted me at all you fucking asshole–
(In which Tweek emerges from his decade long absence from Craig’s life as a sober desert hippie and Craig is just an emotionally stunted mechanic in South Park. They try to figure it out.)
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Bookmarked by moonphrog
17 Jul 2026
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“Craig Tucker,” the man introduced himself, his voice professional and his expression impossible to read. “I’m your physical therapist.”
Oh.
Oh, shit.
That was not what Tweek had been expecting.
After all the hype Bebe had given him, he’d prepared himself for someone attractive enough. He’d pictured someone along the lines of a Matt Damon type—good-looking, sure, but in a normal, approachable way (no offense, Matt Damon). Maybe a little older, with a few graying hairs and an aura that came with years of experience.
Not… this.
Not someone who looked like they’d wandered off the set of a Calvin Klein campaign and accidentally ended up working in sports medicine.
———
OR: Tweek's new PT is unreasonably attractive.
Bookmarked by moonphrog
17 Jul 2026
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Putting a ten year old Craig Tucker to bed is not easy. It’s even harder when all the kid wants to do is talk about his future plans with his boyfriend.
Bookmarked by moonphrog
15 Jul 2026
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The girls find out their boyfriends have been using Chat GPT to text them. Tweek finds out he's got the best boyfriend in South Park.
Bookmarked by moonphrog
15 Jul 2026
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Tweek was supposed to be researching artifacts. Abandoned Ruins. An ancient civilization in the Andes.
He was an archeologist, damn it.
A living, breathing society was never part of the deal.
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- English
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Bookmarked by moonphrog
09 Jul 2026
Bookmarker's Notes
INCAN CHIEF CRAIG AND ARCHEOLOGIST TWEEK MY BABIESSSSSS, I NEED MOREEEEEE