nownotever



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  1. Public Bookmark *

    Summary

    A series of Ilya and Shane struggling to get people to take their relationship reveals very seriously at all.

    The fics in this series are set in the same universe, so these are the SAME Shane and Ilya. Although they can be read in any order, Totally Real Canadian Boyfriend™️ takes place roughly 5 years before Pour Decisions.

    Words:
    24,758
    Works:
    2
    Bookmarks:
    998

    22 Jul 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Shane makes a list: reasons to Come Out on one side and to Stay Safe on the other. It's definitely not meant to accidentally star in the background of his mom's Instagram post for fans to find.

    But now that the world knows, maybe Shane can finally let himself have everything he's wanted.

    If only Ilya didn't go out and get engaged the next day. Which is fine! Rozanov was settling down? Shane could settle down, too. He would find himself a nice man.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,779
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    790
    Kudos:
    19,611
    Bookmarks:
    3,733
    Hits:
    122,600

    27 Jun 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Forester (Admirals🔛🔝)
    So the true way to combat the Bisexual Russian Terminator isn’t with homophobia...
    It's actually with even more gay
    ...
    You're a goddamn genius.

    ----

    The NHL rookies have joined forces to strategize now that two of the greatest hockey players of all time are on the same team and Ilya Rozanov must suffer from the unintended consequences of making hockey more woke.

    Mainly, the way everyone keeps implying that they want to fuck his husband.

    or: a group of rookies unionize and employ chirping as a form of psychological torture against a one Ilya Grigoryevich Rozanov.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,155
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1,280
    Kudos:
    24,827
    Bookmarks:
    4,710
    Hits:
    139,108

    27 Jun 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Bood: And what would this person need to get Roz to settle down?
    Roz: must be most beautiful person you have ever seen
    Roz: very funny but does not know they are funny
    Roz: and suck dick like their life depends on it

    Or: The Centaurs know that Roz is sad, and probably a little lonely. So they do their best to set him up with someone who matches his specific list of requirements. What they don't know is that their captain has already found that person.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,782
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    17
    Comments:
    928
    Kudos:
    26,220
    Bookmarks:
    4,369
    Hits:
    140,881

    07 Jun 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    “Mm, not stuff his pockets with the drug everyone thinks makes you gay right before a press conference? Maybe!” Ilya’s voice chimed happily from the phone.

    “You wanna tell us why you’re so acquainted with Rush that you can identify it in 780p, Ilya?” Kip asked.

    “…I have so much leather to deodorize, Kip Grady. So many sports cars, you know.”

    --

    Kip can't believe no one else can tell how outrageously gay Ilya Rozanov is, but he's not complaining, he's happy to have someone else to talk to at all the hockey functions.

    Or: Perfect gaydar haver Ilya Rozanov finally gets a taste of his own medicine. A series of looks into Kip and Ilya's friendship, starting after the cottage.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    19,912
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Comments:
    1,888
    Kudos:
    24,407
    Bookmarks:
    6,609
    Hits:
    180,798

    23 May 2026