qpenelope



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    She’s buying a box of condoms when she meets him.

    “Those are shit, you know,” he says, jerking his chin at the pale purple box in her hand. “Can’t feel anything.”

    She stares at him for a moment too long. The bell above the door jingles merrily as a rowdy group of schoolboys enters the store.

    “Excuse you,” she replies, cheeks turning pink.

    Language:
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    25 Mar 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    It was small, slim, about the length of her hand; the leather cover was soft, the sewn-in binding was crisp, and the thick vellum pages were empty. 'Tom Marvolo Riddle' was printed in ancient, flaking gold leaf across the front.

    He had been a Slytherin, a prefect, and head boy in 1944.

    She had checked.

    [ ALTERNATIVELY - Hermione finds Tom Riddle's diary. ]

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    18,876
    Chapters:
    9/9
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    297
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    2,400
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    20 Mar 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    It takes a Village to make a relationship--Or, at least, a bunch of over-reaching grumpy old farts, a military leader with a bit too much to drink, a nosy but well meaning kunoichi, eight ninken, and the power of youth. And a really cranky chakra monster with nine tails and a penchant for swearing.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    189,984
    Chapters:
    19/19
    Collections:
    10
    Comments:
    320
    Kudos:
    3,599
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    04 Mar 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    Wherein Kakashi seems oddly dedicated to making Naruto lose her mind.

     

    Or: Five times Kakashi makes Naruto blush, and one time she returns the favour.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,661
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    36
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    228
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    19 Feb 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    This is it, centuries of excellent genetics, of carefully selected marriages to maximise the potential of future generations and it’s going to be Sasuke who introduces idiocy to the Uchiha bloodline.

     

     

     

     

     

     

    The ancestors must be rolling in their graves.

     

    In which Sasuke is smitten, Naruto is a badass, and timetravel happens.

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    Language:
    English
    Words:
    16,194
    Chapters:
    14/14
    Collections:
    19
    Comments:
    720
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    18 Feb 2026