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The saber moved as if in slow motion, a crimson arc lighting up the air. He raised his own blade in an attempt to block but before he had even completed the motion he knew he was too slow. Too late. Viciously the saber swung down, following the merciless trajectory of that arc. Pain exploded, a white hot heat radiating from his arm all throughout his entire body. He heard a scream. His scream. The man above him just laughed. Then he raised his saber again.
Anakin sat bolt upright in bed, breathing hard and drenched in a cold sweat. It took him a moment to regain his bearings and realize where he was. He was in his bed in his room in his quarters in the Temple. He was safe on Coruscant. Geonosis was in the past. Still, he felt that fire in his arm again, pulsing pain emanating from the place his right hand used to be.
The healers had promised they would fit him with a cybernetic but he had to heal more first as was for now left with a stump.
He had never felt so helpless in his life. Not even as a slave.
It had never really occurred to him just how many things he used his right hand for on a daily basis: saber practice and dueling, tinkering with droids and speeders, piloting, even just getting dressed in the morning. Now it could do none of those things. He could do none of those things.
And it scared him.
His breath hitched. Tears pooled in his eyes but he refused to shed them, refused to let himself be any weaker than he already was. He was not a child. He would be stronger than this.
Nonetheless a sob broke free from his throat and from that point there was nothing he could do.
He cradled his stump of an arm against his chest as he wailed. It wasn’t fair. This wasn’t supposed to happen. He was a Jedi, he was the Chosen One, things like this just couldn’t happen to him. Grief for the life he felt he had lost, helplessness, and fear surged with pain. Louder and louder sobs wracked his body. He couldn't calm down, couldn’t stop crying. Here, too he felt helpless. Here, too, he felt scared.
The shrill sound of his comm chirping cut through his cries. At first he ignored it, too distraught to deal with a call right now, but after the third consecutive call he knew he had to do something. He slowed his breathing, bringing his emotions back under some semblance of control, and prayed his voice wouldn’t sound too shattered.
“Skywalker,” he said gruffly into the comm.
“Anakin?” said a concerned voice.
“Obi-Wan. What is it? Does the Council need something?”
“No, it’s not that, it’s…I felt a disturbance in the Force along our bond. I just wanted to check on you, especially with everything that’s happened. Are you all right?”
Anakin’s first instinct was to lie, to brush off the concern and pretend like nothing was wrong so he could suffer in silence. Yet when he tried to voice his denial all that came out was a choked sob.
“Anakin? What’s happening? Talk to me.” Obi-Wan kept his voice gentle, not wanted to upset his Padawan any further.
“I-I-I- I’m-“ Anakin broke off for a moment as sobs overtook him again. “Master,” he finally got out, “I don’t know what to do, I’m scared.”
“It’s all right, dearheart, I’m here for you. What can I do?”
Anakin swallowed wetly. “Can you come over? Please. I’m terrified.” The last words were barely spoken above a whisper.
“Of course. Stay right where you are and I’ll be there soon.”
It could have been minutes, it could have been hours, Anakin couldn’t tell from inside his tear-fueled haze, but finally, he heard the faint whooshing sound of the door to his quarters opening followed by soft footsteps padding across the carpet to his bedroom.
A gentle knock.
“Anakin?” Obi-Wan called from the other side of the door. “Are you in there? Is it all right if I come in?”
Anakin nodded before he realized his Master couldn’t see him. “Yes,” he rasped out instead.
The door slid open to reveal a concerned-looking Obi-Wan clad only in sleep clothes and a robe, worry evident in both his expression and the way he surreptitiously wrung his hands inside the sleeves of his robe. He took one look at his Palawan’s tear-stained face and then, without another word, walked right up to the bed and climbed in beside the other man, pulling him into his arms.
“Oh, Anakin,” he crooned, rubbing circles into his Padawan’s back. “It’s ok, I’m here now. It’s gonna be ok.”
Anakin just buried his face in Obi-Wan’s chest and cried harder, fingers of his left hand fisted in the man’s sleep tunic
“I know it’s hard now and I know it hurts, but I promise you will be ok and you will make it through this. And I promise I will be here to support you every step of the way. “
“But what if I can’t?” Anakin sobbed, finally giving voice to the fear inside him. “This changes everything. What if I can’t do anything anymore, can’t be a Jedi anymore? What if I can’t get through this?”
“You can, Anakin, and you will. I know everything seems frightening and uncertain now, but that doesn’t mean that things are destined to turn out poorly. And yes things are different now but I have never known you to be anything but adaptable, not to mention ready to take on any challenge. This will be a harder challenge then you have ever faced before, but I know that face it you will.
“But that can come later. For now, I want you to work on finding enough peace that you can sleep the rest of the night and we can talk more in the morning, ok?”
Anakin nodded into his chest.
Obi-Wan pressed a gentle kiss to the top of Anakin’s head and pulled his arms around him even tighter. “I love you and I will be here for you.”
“Thank you,” Anakin whispered brokenly, his tears starting to dry.
Obi-Wan shifted slightly, turning over onto his back and pulling Anakin with him so his Padawan could lie with his head pillowed on Obi-Wan’s chest. “Sleep now, young one,” he said gently, putting a slight Force suggestion into his words. “I’ll guard your dreams while you sleep and be here for you in the morning.”
Anakin gave one last sniffle, then closed his eyes, breathing slowly evening out. Obi-Wan pressed a last kiss to the crown of Anakin’s head then settled in to meditate, content to keep his young love safe.