Chapter Text
I really don’t want to get up…
With what little energy I can muster, I force my eyelids open. The pale ceiling greets me, as it always does.
Pale… bland, dull, forgettable… almost reminds me of someone.
I know that I should be alert, and that I should be rushing to get ready for school, but I really don’t feel like it. My bed is safe and warm, like a fluffy little nest for a robin.
Propping myself up, I lazily swing out of bed and lumber downstairs towards the kitchen. Today’s breakfast will be the same as it always has been; a simple bowl of cereal, with just enough milk to matter.
I slowly raise the spoon, then lower it, then raise it, repeat, the same thing, repeat. I can’t even really taste it.
Some might argue that I’d have a bit more pep in the mornings if actually tried to make an involved, nutritious breakfast, but I’m just not cut out for that sort of thing. I continue to shovel in the cereal, eating it simply because I need it to live.
After washing the bowl, I drift towards the bathroom. I should probably shower; I need to look the part, after all.
The water is warm enough to create dainty puffs of steam, fogging up the mirror on the wall. For a few minutes, I simply stand under the running water, hoping that it will wash away the dreary sleepiness. It barely works.
I finish up and dry myself, and start getting dressed. Although my school’s uniform requires that we wear a blazer, I usually wear mine open. It’s a small gesture, but it’s one of the few things I have control over; having this small element of choice helps me breathe a bit easier, both figuratively and literally.
I return to brush my teeth, but accidentally squeeze a huge glob of toothpaste onto my collar.
“Oh, heck…”
I try to wipe it off with my thumb, but I end up smearing it into the fabric more, which only makes it more apparent.
Eh, whatever… no one’s gonna notice anyway.
I look up into the mirror. A blank, listless face stares back at me, with empty, glassy eyes.
“It’s just another day… try to take it easy…” I say to my reflection. She paints a toothy smile onto her face, and turns away to look through the slightly open window. Down below stands an impatient looking boy, checking the watch on his wrist. He sighs in annoyance and looks over to my house.
That boy is Emery; he’s been my best friend since we were little kids. Some people might call him “blunt” or “dense”, but I think that’s a bit mean. He really does mean well, and is really quite wonderful once you get to know him.
We used to hang out often, but recently he’s been acting more standoffish, preferring to spend time by himself. Part of me is pained by it, but another part of me is somewhat relieved; if he forgets about me, I won’t be weighing him down anymore. He’ll be free to pursue friendships with so many wonderful people.
I was hoping to convince him to join the club that I help run; whilst it might not be his first interest, the literature club has so many lovely people in it! He’d be sure to hit it off with them, and then he’d no longer need me.
If he can be happy, then I can be happy… right?
I take a deep breath, and wear a convincing grin as I throw the door open. Looking around, I notice that Emery has just started to walk on his own to school. He’s getting annoyed with you… you have to help him forget about you…
And the first step is to introduce him to the other members of the literature club.
I cup my hand to my mouth, and shout after him in the cheeriest voice I can.
“Heeeeeyyyyyyyyyy!”
He turns around, and simply watches as I run to catch up with him.
“I… I overslept again!” I pant, trying to catch my breath. “But I caught you this time!”
“Maybe,” he smirks, “but only because I decided to stop and wait for you.”
“Eeehh? You say that like you were thinking about ignoring me!”
I feign disapproval, pouting slightly. “That’s mean, Emery!”
“Well, if people stare at you for acting weird then I don’t want them to think we’re a couple or something.”
Oof. That was pretty direct.
“Fine,” I say, trying to wave the feeling off, “but you did wait for me, after all. I guess you don’t have it in you to be mean even if you want to~
I smile at him teasingly, poking his shoulder.
“Whatever you say, Sayori…” he sighs, rolling his eyes.
The two of us cross the street, and start making our way to school. I decide now’s the best time to make my move.
“So, have you thought about joining any clubs?” I ask, turning over to him.
“Clubs?” he cocks his head to me, raising an eyebrow. “I told you, I’m not really interested in joining any clubs.”
“Eh? But you’d told me you’d at least take a look!”
“Did I…?” he ponders, scratching his chin. Does he really not remember? We had been talking about it just last week online!
Maybe he was… just trying to get me to shut up?
That hurts a little, but I suppose it means he’s becoming his own person. I should be happy for him. However, he still needs a little push, so I’m going to press this point.
“Yeah! I was worried you wouldn’t develop any social skills and end up being some NEET! Your happiness is really important to me, you know!”
I might be creative with the truth, but I’m not lying here; I want him to be happy. If he can’t comfortably be around anyone except me, he’s just going to get dragged down. He deserves better than that.
“You trust me right? Don’t make me keep worrying about you…”
“Alright…” he sighs dismissively, “I’ll look at a few clubs if it’ll make you happy.”
“No promises though,” he says sternly, pointing directly at me.
“Will you at least promise me you’ll try a little?” I plead. You need this… please…
“Yeah, I guess I’ll promise you that.”
“Yay~!” I pump my fist in the air in victory. Even if he doesn’t seem incredibly enthused, it gives me an excuse to bring him to my club later.
We arrive at school just in time. I shouldn’t make him wait so long for me, or he might get into trouble…
“I’ll see you after school, yeah?” I smile at him, waving. “You’d better make an effort to join a club, mister!”
I waggle my finger at him in mock discipline, to which he laughs dryly. “Yeah, Yeah…”
He wanders off to his own class without another word, leaving me alone.
Alright… that wasn’t so bad… now I just need to make it to the end of the day…