Chapter Text
the crater.
Toshinori waits.
For what, he doesn’t know. He doesn’t have the presence of mind to catalogue how badly injured he is. He remembers looking down after All For One. The sensation of everything flopping, his torn intestines pulling everything. Out. Forward.
It feels like plucking a guitar.
The pain is unbearable. Incomprehensible. He lies where he fell, less than half-aware.
All he knows is All For One isn’t here.
Time is meaningless. It may have been a second. A minute. Hours, months, years. He lies, hands clamped over the worst of the wound. It’s not enough. He can feel his heart struggling. He can feel how empty his abdomen is.
All For One escaped.
I’m sorry. I'm sorry. I —
A thud.
A body falling.
Toshinori opens his eyes.
Smoke. Sparks. Fire.
A man, sprawled. It looks like his legs gave out on him. His face is covered with a cloth and yellow goggles. He’s shaking so hard that Toshinori registers it through his own haze. Though the sickly stench of raw sewage and burning, twisted, melted debris: glass, metal, dead bodies. No one should be here. It’s too dangerous.
The rational part asks: Why wasn’t he recalled?
“All Might,” the man says, and it’s high and warbling; it shackles Toshinori’s awareness; it’s the voice of someone who is more scared than they have ever been before. “All Might. All Might.”
The human part has never been more grateful to see another living creature.
The man seems to jolt back to himself, at least enough that he fumbles with his ear. His comm. His hands are shaking too badly to handle it, so he shoves it into his trousers. He never breaks eye contact with Toshinori. His yellow goggles reflect the sickening lights.
Without pause, he crawls forward. He’s shaking and doesn’t trust himself to stand, but he pushes through the worst of the rubble. He stops and picks up something fleshy. It may or may not be part of Toshinori, but the man doesn’t stop. He brings it and a few more ragged, likely useless pieces forward. A bloody lump. A crunched, bloody bone. An incisor and a molar. He sets them down between them before struggling to stand.
“I am Eraserhead,” he says, higher than before; Toshinori doesn’t need to see his eyes to know he’s out of his mind with fear. “I am not a medic.”
He begins to strip out of his trousers. Toshinori watches because it is all he can do. Eraserhead bunches the fabric in his hands and, after a moment of staring at Toshinori’s hands, begins to arrange the legs of the trousers around them. Covering more of the wound. It is so painful it wipes out Toshinori’s vision. His ears ring.
When he comes back, there’s sobbing. High, frightened, short wails. Eraserhead not a medic. He is trying to save his life.
All Might is the Symbol of Peace.
“It’s okay,” he manages.
It is like pulling One For All onto his tongue. He smiles. He doesn’t take his gaze off the yellow goggles.
“Because you are here.”
Eraserhead shudders. He keeps the pressure on the wound steady. He makes soft, hitching sobs beneath his mask, which Toshinori realises was made of torn fabric from his shirt. In the dying light, surrounded by destruction:
Toshinori fell in love.
the aquarium.
For Shouta’s twenty-eighth birthday, Toshinori took him on a date.
It was a complete surprise.
“I hope you don’t mind,” he said over breakfast, “but I bought us tickets for the aquarium.”
“Huh,” Shouta croaked, after burning his tongue on coffee.
“You loved that documentary we watched,” Toshinori said, smiling widely because he must have been hoping for this reaction; once coming out from sedation, he’d called it cute like a nervous cat. “About the Great Barrier Reef. I thought this would be fun.”
They had watched that documentary nearly two months ago. Shouta had been under the impression that Toshinori had fallen asleep during it. Shouta sipped his coffee. It felt too warm.
“You idiot,” he said into the cup. “Of course I don’t mind.”
He was even more surprised that Toshinori was able to keep it secret at all. He’s such a transparent person, always a little nervous and bombastic to make up for it. Keeping his identity and the state of his body a secret seems to be the extent of his deceptive abilities. He even got new civilian clothes that fit him without One For All. Shouta stared for a long moment at the jacket and baseball cap as they got ready. The soft blue matched his eyes.
They took a cab to the aquarium on the edge of the city. The autumn weather was mild, not particularly chilly and with an intermittent breeze. It was Shouta’s favourite weather, and they lingered in the fall leaves for a long time. It wouldn’t have been possible if not for how unrecognisable they both are: no one knows who Shouta is and only a handful would recognise Toshinori. Holding Toshinori’s hand as they handed the tickets in at the door:
Shouta was so grateful to experience this.
“What do you want to do first?” Toshinori asked as they looked at the map of exhibits. “Or do you just want to stare at me all day?”
Shouta laughed. He gripped Toshinori’s hand and didn’t stop smiling. He didn’t need to. Just this once.
“Can I do both?” he asked, which made Toshinori laugh.
They spent all day in the aquarium. Making their way through the exhibits. Enjoying the sights of fish, crustaceans, spiraling kelp, endless water. It was the middle of the week, and there were only a couple of elementary school classes that were easy to avoid. Toshinori stopped to read nearly every display, voicing his amazement at every new fact. Shouta could stare at the fish in the soft lighting for as long as he wanted without worrying about either of their quirks.
The highlight, which Shouta knew immediately he would covet as a memory until the end of days, was watching the penguin feeding. They stood in the back while the elementary schoolers sat on the floor, exclaiming excitedly as the keeper giving the talk described eating, behavioral, and mating habits. Toshinori stood with his mouth covered and eyes bright. For once, it was because he wanted to hide his huge smile rather than coughs.
“I had no idea they make nests in guano,” he whispered to Shouta. “They’re so cute and resourceful!”
Like you, Shouta thought.
He didn’t say it aloud. Instead, he nudged their shoulders together. Toshinori looked at him. His eyes sparkled, his grin wided.
Shouta’s heart felt so full.
They took an early dinner at the curry restaurant they both favoured. They made super mild curry, which Toshinori could eat without any issues, and it was laidback enough that Shouta always felt comfortable. Shouta allowed himself a beer, and Toshinori got tea. They sat on the same side of the booth, fingers entwined and shoulders touching.
“You’re happy,” Toshinori whispered.
Shouta nodded. Squeezed Toshinori’s hand.
“Yes.”
Like this, in this moment:
Life had never been better.
the beach.
Midoriya Izuku is a walking disaster.
Toshinori is, too.
After watching over Midoriya’s training for two nights, Shouta is forced to come to the conclusion that this was inevitable. Of course Toshinori would never go down any of the careful, logical routes which Sir Nighteye, Nedzu, and Gran Torino have been attempting to shepard him. They all want him to select a student from U.A. The best and the brightest who would have the support and the background to carry One For All. They would continue the work as the Symbol of Peace, and All Might could retire with appropriate fanfare and grace. But in typical Yagi Toshinori fashion, he found the one child just like himself:
Quirkless, determined, and with a heart too large to be contained.
Midoriya is a good kid. Too good, too determined, too eager to please. He idolises Toshinori like such sincerity it’s like looking straight into the sun. He’s so respectful of Shouta especially after his quirk is explained. He speaks exactly what comes to his mind and absorbs all information given to him like a starved creature, willing to take any scrap and turn it into sustenance.
Shouta remembers what it was like to live like that.
“You’re stressed,” Toshinori observes as they watch Midoriya push twenty-five kilos of trash up the beach.
Shouta grunts. Forces his fingers to ease their death grip on his capture scarf. He reaches up and tucks his hair away from his face briefly before letting it drop down again. It earns him a sheepish, concerned look.
“I noticed you’ve been losing more sleep than usual,” Toshinori says.
Midoriya makes a loud noise to psych himself up. He throws his whole weight into lifting a lorry tire that’s encased in half-dried, half-rotten seaweed. It’s a dangerous lift. Toshinori touches Shouta’s elbow before jogging down to Midoriya to correct his form.
Shouta has been losing sleep. Not just because of this. Somewhat guiltily, Toshinori and Midoriya are fairly low on the list of what is keeping him up at night. There will be drama, but Shouta knows it will be Toshinori’s to weather. Shouta made a conscious choice not to get involved with the succession process for One For All and the Symbol of Peace. He didn’t know Shimura Nana at all.
In this, Shouta knows his place.
The primary stress in Shouta’s life is his new position as the Head of U.A. Security. Despite reading through the contract, he doesn’t really understand what he is supposed to be doing. Shouta has lived the past six years of his life to keep Toshinori safe. With Toshinori beginning as a teacher in the spring, Shouta thought he would continue to shadow him. He did not expect an official position.
“You’re more than All Might’s bodyguard,” Nedzu said when Shouta was too quiet after first reading the contract. “U.A. needs your skills just as much as he does.”
It’s true. The greatest complaint that Nemuri and Hizashi make as U.A. teachers is that security is lax. It is so hard to control a class when quirks get out of control. It doesn’t happen often, but there are always accidents. There isn’t anyone on staff with Erasure or anything close to it, so the best they can do is combine different quirks to minimise the damage. Students get hurt regularly, and Recovery Girl’s increasing age is also a concern.
“I’m not getting any younger,” she confided, the last time Shouta got his eyes checked. “A Quirk like yours with your level of control would be very helpful.”
He has no idea how to surmount the task of telling Hizashi and Nemuri that he is now their colleague. He will finally tell them about his involvement in All Might’s employ. It forces him to break his promise to protect them from reality.
The Symbol of Peace is fragile. Shouta is part of the network of props keeping him up. He is All Might’s eyes. The watchful presence to reduce the strain on his damaged body these last six years. He is Toshinori’s safety net. His closest friend. Lover.
Down on the beach, Toshinori demonstrates how to safely lift an object that’s bigger and heavier than oneself. Midoriya scribbles hurriedly in his notebook, nodding with intense, focused eyes.
Hands tucked in his scarf, knuckles against his lips, Shouta hides a smile.
Toshinori is his everything. Selfishly as much as out of necessity: Shouta holds that truth close. He never mentions it anyone. Not their circumstances. Not their memories. Not their words. Of course, Recovery Girl, Gran Torino, and Nedzu probably know enough to understand parts. Sir Nighteye must know, but that cannot be prevented. It doesn’t mean any of them understand.
It makes him happy. It also makes him selfish.
He has no idea if Hizashi or Nemuri will accept any of this.
Whatever happens now is going to hurt a lot.
It is his own arrogant oversight. Against experience and logic, he wanted to protect them from the truth forever. Over the past six years, he’s watched them become successful Pro Heroes and teachers. In that time, they watched him, picking up what threads of his life he’s been able to offer them. They both know he moved in with someone, but Shouta suspects they’re under the impression that it’s part of his job. They both have said things that indicate they’re afraid he’s involved with organised crime, and Shouta hasn’t offered anything to discourage that. It keeps him up at night.
Down the beach, Toshinori and Midoriya cheer themselves. Each other. To see Toshinori do that in his true form:
Shouta wants to run across the sand and shake Midoriya’s hand.
No one else will understand, but this is the best choice possible.