Chapter Text
It’s subdued, as far as parties go; quiet music, no smoke filling the air, people mingling unobtrusively throughout the house. Levi would rather not be here at all, but he can only bow out of so many social functions before everyone starts whining about it. Listening to his friends complain is more trouble than showing up now and again, so here he is, albeit somewhat grudgingly. Erwin’s place is big enough that he can escape upstairs if he feels the urge, except Levi’s having an uncharacteristically good time. It’s not that he’s doing anything particularly interesting— sitting on a worn out couch, nursing a warm beer, just this side of tipsy.
It’s the view that has him relaxing into the cushions, mouth curving into an amused grin.
Eren’s playing pool. Trying to play pool, anyway. He’s holding the cue just wrong enough that it’s frustrating to watch, missing every shot, balls rolling wide again and again. He’s losing, badly, and Levi would feel sorry for him if it wasn’t such bullshit.
Eren is better at pool than anyone in the room. Levi’s seen him hustle drunk frat boys out of their cash more times than he can count, just because he can. There’s no money on the table right now, but Eren is still hustling, even if no one else has noticed.
Erwin sidles up behind him, taking the bait beautifully, pressing in close. He corrects Eren’s hold on the cue, leans down into him as they line up a shot together, mouth moving next to Eren’s ear as he gives soft instructions. Eren bites his lip, cheeks a bit pink— he’ll blame it on the alcohol if Levi calls him out, but they both know better— and lets Erwin guide his hands. The cue slides through them, hitting the cue ball and sending it rolling across the table. There are several satisfying clicks, a chain reaction, and two separate balls sink home. There are drunken cheers from somewhere off to the left, but Eren isn’t paying attention. He’s turning into Erwin, eyes almost closed, breathing in deep.
It’s obvious to anyone looking closely enough. Eren has never been subtle.
Levi isn’t the only one watching them with no interest in who wins or loses the game. Mike leans against the wall across the room, smirking as Erwin pulls back from Eren. Slowly, palms lingering on his forearms a moment too long, still in Eren’s space. Eren flusters and goes to line up his next shot, circling the table to put distance between himself and Erwin, who’s watching with shameless appreciation.
Wen Mike notices he’s been caught staring he grins wider, rolling his eyes in faux exasperation, and Levi snorts into his beer.
Eren has been doing this dance with the two of them for a while now; one step forward, two steps back. It was cute at first— endearing. Adorable.
Now Levi just wants to shake him.
Eren sits down next to him after throwing the round in spectacular fashion, and Levi puts his beer on the floor, takes Eren’s face in his hands, and kisses him. Chaste and fast, thoughtlessly familiar. Eren smiles, brows furrowed, and Levi holds his gaze.
“For someone so smart, you’re being very stupid.”
Eren whines and tucks his face into Levi’s neck.
“I know.”
Levi runs his fingers through Eren’s hair, and picks up his beer again, finishing it in one loud swallow. Erwin and Mike are watching them, a little rueful, and Levi just shrugs one shoulder helplessly.
He’s done all he can for now.
-
The ride home is agonizingly silent, eating away at Levi until he can’t take it anymore. One too many beers, and he can’t bite his tongue like he normally might, can’t keep the words from spilling out.
“We’ve talked about this,” Levi says, and Eren sighs.
“I know we have.”
The same conversation over and over, but Levi can’t seem to make him understand. They’d talked about Eren dating other people close to a year ago, and ever since Levi had suggested it, Eren had seemed enthusiastic about the idea. Floored that he wouldn’t mind, that he wouldn’t be jealous or hurt, that Levi didn’t feel slighted. Except then it had all been hypothetical.
Erwin and Mike’s eager, unabashed flirtation was very real, and Eren didn’t seem to know how to deal with it.
“You still think you’re not allowed,” Levi says, and Eren makes a noise of disagreement.
“It’s not that I’m not allowed, it just… feels weird. Especially with you right there.”
“I wouldn’t have to be right there if you’d just ask them out. Separately, together. They won’t care, they’ll just be excited.”
Eren isn’t the only person Levi’s had frank, open conversations with, laying all his cards on the table. Some of Eren’s cards, too, if only vaguely. Levi hasn’t spelled it out for Eren in so many words, but Mike and Erwin know how Levi feels about Eren seeing other people— how he feels about Eren seeing them, specifically. But Levi can’t fight all his battles for him.
There are some things he needs to do for himself.
Eren shifts in the driver’s seat as he changes gears, carrying them smoothly through the empty suburban streets towards home.
“I can’t.”
“Why not? You want to, they want to. I want you to. I want you be happy.”
The lengths Levi would go to in order to make Eren happy are embarrassingly staggering; Levi has long since stopped being surprised by the things he would do, just to see Eren smile.
“You’re happy now, though. With me. Aren’t you?” Eren asks, and Levi frowns.
“Of course I am? We’re literally married, Eren. We painted the kitchen olive, I don’t know what else you want from me.”
“Happy with just me,” Eren adds. “And I’m happy with just you! I love you. I don’t want to fuck up our relationship being…”
“Being what?” Levi asks when Eren trails off, but they both know what he doesn’t want to say.
Greedy. Selfish. Eren knows better, but Levi can only tell him the same thing so many times before it gets tiring for them both. Levi has tried to wait it out, to see if it’s just a passing crush that Eren will get over.
Six months later, though, and Eren is still making eyes at Levi’s friends. Still staring, and flirting. Asking about them when they’re not around, stalking their Instagram accounts.
Hustling them at pool, just so Erwin will put his hands on him.
Levi takes a breath, and lets it out slow.
“I love you. Part of that is me wanting to give you the things you want, the things that will make you happy. This is something you want, and there’s nothing wrong with it. I can’t give it to you, but I can tell you that it’s okay to to go for it. I know Erwin, I know Mike. I trust them, and I trust you.”
Eren is quiet for a long, long time, and when he speaks it’s whisper soft.
“Maybe you shouldn’t.”
Levi lays his hand over Eren’s on the gearshift, thumb rubbing across his knuckles, fingers curling around his wrist.
“You don’t get to decide how I feel about things. You only get to decide what you do. I trust you, and I love you. They could too, one day, maybe. If you gave them a chance.”
If you gave yourself a chance, he thinks, but Eren already looks overwhelmed, so he doesn’t say any more.
By the time they get home, he’s just drunk enough to fire off a text to Mike and Erwin.
This boy is ridiculous. We’re all going to die old, ugly men before he makes a move. Ball is in your court.