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Robb had only done it to ask, really. He’d been meeting Theon in disguise for years when he was roaming the earth looking for someone to share his eternity with. But then Theon had vanished and Robb had been insanely jealous of whatever made him vanish and when one of Arya’s helpers had been making his rounds and heard someone who sounded like they were in a bad spot insisting their name was Theon and maybe they’d mentioned it to Robb and he’d ordered Theon brought to him and…
He was an idiot. This was not how a Stark acted. You didn’t get a straight answer from someone you just fucking kidnapped.
“Robb, Gendry said it sounded bad. You know, the sort of thing where ‘hey, Arya, you epic goddess of vengeance you, you’re going to want to look into this one,’” Arya said casually. “He’ll probably be glad you got him out of there.”
“Only to trap him here with me?” Robb asked.
“Did you ever get the Stark honor, brother dear,” she laughed. “You won’t know until you talk to him.”
When Robb did nothing she lightly waved her sword at him, “Go on, get.”
As Lord of the Dead he really outranked her. As her big brother he obviously outranked her. He still knew she’d make him do it.
“Fine. If only to apologize,” Robb said.
If Theon had been tortured, as Arya guessed, then Robb could simply let him recuperate here before letting him go. At least stay with him again for a while…but it was up to Theon. Robb wouldn’t make him do anything.
He stopped dead when he reached the room Gendry had brought Theon to.
Theon looked so thin and his hair had gone gray. Robb knew he hadn’t been missing for more than a couple of years so it likely had been torture that did that to him. And Robb really didn’t like how his left hand was cradled to his chest like that… “Theon?”
Theon’s head snapped up. His cheeks were so hollow and his eyes were dull but they lit when he saw Robb, “Robin? Robin Wolfe?”
“Yes,” Robb said softly, smiling at the name of the alias he’d met Theon under.
“So…you’re dead too, huh?” Theon asked.
“Not so much,” Robb said. “I…I’m afraid I wasn’t quite honest with you, Theon. I…I’m not a mortal. Never was.”
“You work for the lord of the dead?” Theon guessed.
“I…I actually am the Lord of the Dead and Steward of the Underworld,” Robb said.
“Oh…well…thanks for finally taking me then.”
“Theon, you’re not dead either.” And Robb felt so cold at how Theon apparently was fine with the idea of being dead.
“But I’m here?” Theon asked, confused.
“I’ve been looking for you.”
“Oh. Well…I can see why that might have been hard. I wasn’t near where we used to meet or the Iron Islands…”
“What happened?” Robb demanded.
“Some sick bastard lost the sick bastard he was friends with and I looked similar so he kidnapped me and tried to make me be the dead guy,” Theon said, shrugging. His lips started to curl up into one of his smirks but he seemed to notice and forced it down.
“No, smile,” Robb pleaded. “I…I always loved your smile.”
“Not so pretty right now,” Theon said, briefly forcing a semblance of a smile before dropping it.
Robb felt furious upon seeing the broken and missing teeth. And yet he still loved that smile. He reached out and cupped Theon’s cheek, “Do you know why I was meeting you as Robin?”
“I…well…it kind of felt like you were…courting me? I know that sounds silly-”
Robb’s free hand wound its way around Theon’s hips. “No, that’s it exactly.”
“…Why?” Theon asked. “All right, I’ll give you that I could be a bit charming but-”
“A bit charming? Theon you are the most charming person I’ve ever met,” Robb said. “As well as the funniest, the most interesting-”
“Well, I’m glad you thought so,” Theon said.
“I still think so,” Robb said.
“Then you’re wrong,” Theon said. “I mean no disrespect, but…you’re wrong. About me.”
“Theon, I’ve known you for years,” Robb said.
“But I…I don’t know anymore,” Theon admitted.
“I’d planned to bring you down here two years ago, to talk to you about this,” Robb said. “To explain what I wanted. But…you weren’t there. I looked whenever I had time. I promise.”
“I believe you,” Theon said. “But you have to admit I’m not so much that man anymore.”
“Yes you are,” Robb said. He knew it, he could feel it, feel the soul that made Theon Theon.
“Robb, look at me,” Theon demanded, stepping back and finally pulling his hand from his side.
Robb’s eyes locked onto the missing fingers, “Who did that? Who took those?”
“I…Ramsay. Ramsay Bolton,” Theon said. “He took them when I was being too obstinate.”
“I like you obstinate,” Robb said, the fury making his skin itch. He’d have to get Arya to look into this further. “I like you when you make little snide comments just to make me smile, when you laugh at something ridiculous for far too long. I like you.”
Theon smiled, “Always liked you too, Robin—err, Robb.”
“Then…would you like to stay?” Robb asked. “With me? I…I know it’s not the best place, but I-”
“Okay. I’m surprised you want to but…sure,” Theon said, smiling softly.
“Really?” Robb asked.
“When…when I was with Ramsay…I kept hoping you’d rescue me. Other than my sister you were probably the only person who would. And you did,” Theon said, smiling softly. “And I…I always liked you. You didn’t treat me funny for being the youngest, you thought I was interesting and you were, err, are... Well. Quite handsome.”
His eyes flitted over Robb appreciatively.
“Thank you. Means a lot from you,” Robb said, stepping close to Theon again.
“Robb, look at me,” Theon repeated softly. “I like you, I do but…I don’t think I’m the sort of person who should sit next to a god, is all I’m saying.”
“Theon…yes, you look different,” Robb said. He knew that, he wasn’t blind. “But you’re still you. And that’s what I want.”
Theon smirked softly, “You’re still a bleeding heart, Robb. Always liked that about you.”
“Such a rude way of calling someone nice,” Robb teased, running his fingers through Theon’s brittle hair.
“Well, it does rather work on you,” Theon admitted. “Caring so much. Suppose that’s fitting for the steward of the dead.”
“Suppose it is,” Robb agreed. “So you…you want to stay?”
Theon smiled and nodded.
.o.o.o.
The Underworld was cold. Robb had brought Theon a heavy shirt and cloak even though he was walking around in fairly thin clothes and light armor himself.
Theon was still having trouble realizing this was real. The vengeance spirit with the hammer that had beaten Ramsay’s guards unconscious had sure seemed real, and Robb seemed more than real, but…
It was so strange, the swordsman he’d been friends with actually being a god. There had been a god paying attention to him when he’d been doing stupid shit like mocking maesters and arguing with merchants and showing off his archery for his own ego and…Robb had liked that about him.
It was just odd, having someone like Robb glancing at him like that right now, looking concerned, sure, but also sort of like he shyly wanted Theon.
“I should warn you, I’m not too sure of what I’m doing,” Robb said. “I just wanted to find you and talk to you again and…well, kidnapping you was not on the docket, really.”
“Not kidnapping if they’re all for it,” Theon replied. “Which I was. And like I said, I’d like to stay.”
Robb’s small, shy smile bloomed into a full one and Theon felt warm despite the chill. “Good.”
“So, is there anyone else down here who’s not dead?” Theon asked.
“My sister Arya, Goddess of Vengeance. And her helpers. Gendry’s for vengeance for the poor, Sandor’s for vengeance for the helpless, Jaqen’s for subtle vengeance, and Hot Pie just comforts the people they’re getting vengeance on behalf of since my sister and the others tend to scare everybody witless.”
“Sounds like a lot of avenging going on,” Theon said.
“It’s the land of the dead. Even good souls can’t rest well if they’re tormented by needing to be avenged,” Robb replied. “Plus someone had to help me handle the bad ones, there’s too many for one man to properly punish.”
“Even if that one man is a god?”
“Even so,” Robb said, chuckling. “Do…do you want your own room, or to stay with me?”
Theon smiled. It was like when they’d been having their little hedge-knight-like adventures above, with Robb always worrying about how Theon felt when they could only afford one room at an inn. “With you, seeing as how you clearly want to bed me.”
Robb blushed. It was quite adorable, really, even knowing he was Lord of the Dead. “I…only if you want to, of course.”
“As long as you don’t pin me down to do it,” Theon said before realizing his slip. He hadn’t told Robb about that.
Robb had stopped dead the second he’d said it, “Theon…he…he didn’t. This Ramsay. He didn’t.”
Theon shrugged, making himself stay outwardly calm. “It happened.”
Maybe he’d get lucky and Robb would still agree to be friends. Theon might have been too defiled to be a god’s lover, but-
“I need to talk to Arya. I want him brought to me,” Robb snarled softly, one hand snagging Theon’s waist and pulling him close. “I will handle him myself.”
“Sorry,” Theon said.
“For what? You told me he captured you, tortured you, and you clearly didn’t want it if being reminded of it is a bad thing,” Robb said, his grip tightening. “I sincerely doubt you had a choice in the matter, did you?”
“No. No I did not,” Theon said. His ass ached just at the memory of it. “I didn’t want it but…it happened anyway.”
“If you didn’t want it why are you sorry?” Robb asked. “You…do you think I care? Theon, I know you like sex. I watched you go to whorehouses all the time.”
“Bit different, though, letting off steam by fucking a whore than taking it up the ass,” Theon said.
“Well, I suppose it is, since I felt jealous of those whores but not the jackass who took you,” Robb said.
Theon felt his brain start to hurt as it tried to process that. “You…you felt…jealous. Of whores.”
Robb shrugged, “They got to have you. Have you want to have them.”
“Well if you wanted me why not just have me?” Theon asked. “It’s not like I’d have minded.”
“I…I’m a Stark. We’re not the gods that just take people like that, it’s wrong.”
“Not if they want to be taken,” Theon said. “And if you still want to, you’ll find I’m quite willing.”
The idea of sex with Robin had always intrigued him. Robin being Robb, being a god, didn’t really dampen that.
Going by the look on Robb’s face the redhead also found it intriguing.
“I’m going to kiss you now,” Robb said very seriously, in fact so seriously it nearly made Theon laugh.
The kiss cut off any laughter he might have made, though. Robb wasn’t particularly warm to the touch, though he wasn’t cold either. His lips were firm against Theon’s and Theon kissed back, opening his mouth to encourage Robb to go further.
Robb’s tongue slipped over Theon’s lips slowly, as if still making sure Theon was fine with this. Theon felt his knees going weak as Robb finally stroked his tongue against his. This felt so good, so right.
Robb’s arms wound around him tightly. Theon’s hands fumbled for a grip, his right eventually finding the back of Robb’s head while his left clung to the god’s back.
Robb broke the kiss right as Theon started to run out of breath. His eyes were half-lidded and his lips were red and Theon had never wanted someone more in his life.
“Take me,” he said, pressing himself against Robb.
“Are you sure?”
“Yes. Take me right now if you want.”
“I…let’s get to my room,” Robb said. Theon adored how Robb’s eyes were on him and only him, looking at him like he was greatest thing he’d ever seen.
They rushed down the hall to the room at the end of it. Theon’s feet were screaming by the end of it but he said nothing.
He wondered if he had died and this was simply his soul being at rest in the afterlife, getting something he’d always wanted in life but couldn’t have. But then, he’d never have imagined the wandering swordsman he’d been friends with as a god, would he?
Still, even if this was some sort of afterlife illusion, or some dream, he might as well enjoy it.
Robb let him inside before turning and locking the door.
“Want me all to yourself, then?” Theon asked.
“That and my sister and her henchmen are nosy as fuck,” Robb said. “I tried having a discussion with my half-brother in here once and in comes Hot Pie begging me to taste some new soup of his.”
“Well, that could be rather funny, depending on when it happened,” Theon said.
“Theon.”
“I’m just joking with you, Robb.” He’d probably do that in a dream, joke with Robb before sex. “Nice place you have here.”
“Well, I am essentially a king when it comes to the land of the dead,” Robb said. “I hate the fucking crown, though.”
“Well, let’s not focus on the fucking crown and instead look to the fucking?” Theon asked.
“I agree,” Robb said, his hands going to his shirt ties.
Theon drank in the sight as Robb removed his shirt, his boots, and frankly everything but his trousers. Robb was gorgeous.
“Like what you see?” his friend asked.
“Adore it,” Theon said, his eyes lingering on Robb’s taut stomach.
Robb sat next to him on the bed and Theon’s eyes widened when Robb reached for his shirt.
“Do you want me to let you?” Robb asked softly.
He nodded slowly. He didn’t think he wanted someone else undressing him.
Robb smiled gently and scooted towards the headboard.
Theon slowly realized that this left him essentially stripping himself for Robb’s viewing pleasure. He quietly unclasped the cloak, letting it fall on the bed behind him. He was very aware of Robb watching his hands as he went to pull the shirts over his head.
He heard Robb’s breath hitch, “Oh, Theon…”
He tried not to tense as he felt Robb’s broad hands on his torso, tracing scars. “I…I know it looks bad…”
“How haven’t I seen you before now?” Robb whispered.
Theon was about to answer that it was because he’d been held captive, but then he realized that Robb was asking how he’d survived at all. “He didn’t want me dead. Just hurt and meek.”
“Just…oh Theon,” Robb whispered, leaning close and kissing a large mark near Theon’s collarbone.
“It’s okay,” Theon said.
“No it’s not. Someone hurt you,” Robb said. “I’m so sorry.”
Theon softly ran his fingers through Robb’s curls. “Why? You didn’t do it.”
“Then I’m sorry it happened at all,” Robb said. “I just…I wish I’d done something. Anything.”
“Well…you’re here now, right?” Theon asked.
“Right,” Robb said, sitting up and pulling Theon close. “Well…shall we?”
Theon went to slide off his boots only to feel something was wrong.
“Theon!” Robb yelped as the first boot slid off.
.o.o.o.
There was blood seeping through Theon’s stockings. Robb shuddered. He’d been dragging Theon along in the hall earlier. Had he caused that?
“Shit, I thought it was fine,” Theon hissed.
“You thought what was fine?” Robb asked.
“I…my feet…aren’t in the best shape,” Theon admitted softly. “I…err…it’s like my left hand. Both of them.”
“What?” Robb asked. He slowly pulled the sock off.
The entire front of Theon’s foot was a bloody mess. Robb could see the smallest and middle toes were missing and the wounds from them were bleeding.
“Let me get something,” he said, rushing to his cabinets. He didn’t have much for mortals, but he had strong things that supposedly worked for mortals and gods alike and he hoped they did-
“Sorry.”
“Sorry?” Robb demanded as he dug out a couple gauzy rolls he kept on hand for when Sandor and Jaqen got into fights. “Theon, I’m sorry! I didn’t know and I…that looks so painful…”
Theon shrugged morosely, kicking off his other boot to show a similar situation with that foot. “Sorry I’m this damaged.”
Why couldn’t he have asked sooner? Why not before Theon had been taken? “You…don’t be sorry about that. Here.”
He tried to wipe the gore off Theon’s feet as best he could before rubbing some salve and binding some herbs against the wounds. On impulse he kissed each foot before rising to sit next to Theon. “Do they pain you?”
Theon shrugged again, “Lots of things pain me.”
Robb kissed him, “Then stay. Nothing will pain you here.” He could make sure of it. He would make sure of it.
“Robb I…what would you have me do?”
“Do?” Robb asked. “I’d have you by my side. I’d have you stay and be mine. You could do whatever you wished.”
Theon frowned, looking at his lap, “I…I want to. I do. But I…this is a lot.”
“Would you like some time?” Robb asked.
“I…yes. Before choosing,” Theon said. “But for now…I can still stay here, right?”
“Of course,” Robb promised. “As long as you wish it.”
Theon moved his feet almost experimentally, “This worked pretty quickly. Thanks.”
“You’re welcome.” Theon looked very lovely when he smiled softly like that…
Theon’s grin widened, the appeal increasing with it. “So, what does a man need to do to get a kiss around here?”
“Only to ask,” Robb replied, reaching out and seizing Theon’s chin, gently pressing their lips together.
Theon sighed, “You know, if this is a dream…I’ll take it.”
“It’s not a dream,” Robb said, running his hands down and over Theon’s hips, thumbs lingering on how sharply the bones stuck out. “You’re here, with me. This is real.”
“Is it bad that I’m having trouble believing it still?” Theon asked.
“Not at all. I know it’s a lot,” Robb said. “I’ll give you all the time you need.”
“Thanks,” Theon said, leaning on him. “…Robb?”
“Yes?”
“I…as Robin. I wanted you then, too, you know?”
“I…I had wondered. And hoped.”
Theon shook his head, “Well, you are very good looking. To say nothing of how wonderful you are as a person.”
Rob could feel himself blushing. Theon complimenting him always made him feel like this, like everything was perfect…
“Maybe you can show me around?” Theon asked.
“Are you sure? Your feet-”
“We can walk slowly,” Theon said. “And they feel fine now, I swear.”
It was against his better judgment but… “All right. What would you like to see?”
“Everything?” Theon asked innocently, batting his lashes.
Robb kissed him again. “Sounds great.”
.o.o.o.
Robb kept his arm around his waist as they walked through the underworld. He claimed it was so he had peace of mind knowing Theon wouldn’t get lost, but Theon knew it also was because he wanted to be able to bear Theon’s weight if he started to stumble.
Robb was sweet like that.
“This is Grey Wind. He guards the front of the gates,” Robb said, beckoning a massive wolf with a crooked finger.
The wolf bowed its head down, lightly bumping Robb with its nose. Said nose was the size of Robb’s whole chest.
“Just the front of the gates?” Theon asked.
“Yes, he protects those coming in. Nymeria stops people from leaving,” Robb said, gently scratching Grey Wind’s jaw. “Confidentially, she likes Arya more than me.”
“Poor you,” Theon teased, looking the great beast over. “He’s quite…fluffy.”
“Well he does need to look welcoming when he’s not eating evil spirits and such,” Robb replied.
“C-can I?” Theon asked, gesturing at Grey Wind.
“Sure. One second,” Robb said before whistling.
With a thump that shook the ground Grey Wind fell down and rolled onto his side.
“He likes having his belly rubbed,” Robb explained.
Theon slowly walked over, Robb right behind him, thankfully, to gently rub Grey Wind’s chest.
The wolf huffed happily, its long pink tongue lolling out.
“Who’s a good dog?” Robb cooed, burying his own hands in the thick fur. “Who’s been good? Who ripped apart a demon this morning? You did!”
“Gods you’re…such…”
“A sap?” Robb teased.
“Just a bit,” Theon snickered. “But as I said, it works for you.”
Robb rapped Grey Wind’s ribs slightly and the wolf rolled over before trotting back to his post.
“Why Grey Wind? Anything to do with me?” Theon teased.
“No, sadly, he’s been around longer than you. He’s gray-colored and he’s swift. I’m actually terribly unimaginative.”
“Yes, you are,” Theon agreed. “I remember when we went to rescue that girl, Jeyne?”
“Poole or Westerling?”
“The one in the cellar.”
“Westerling. Poole was in a tower,” Robb said.
“Right. Anyway, you were so uncreative. ‘Go in and open the cellar’ as if it would be so simple!”
“I’m sorry, sometimes I forget the world’s not so simple!” Robb argued.
“I know, it’s adorable,” Theon laughed. Robb was grinning at the teasing though, just like before when Theon would make gentle fun at his expense.
“Come. There’s more to see,” Robb said, leading him back in.
The she-wolf that sat on the other side of the gates was leaner, with shaggier fur and a fiercer look about her. Theon could easily see her preventing escapes.
But Robb didn’t pause beyond telling Nymeria hello, leading him on along a river. “This is the main river. I think Gendry named it once, but I don’t really recall what…”
“Is it safe to touch?”
“Well, yes, beyond being like liquid ice,” Robb said. “In case you haven’t noticed it’s very cold down here.”
“How do you take it? It’s freezing,” Theon agreed, hugging the cloak a bit more tightly around himself.
“Well, being immortal beings rather helps. Also Hot Pie makes a lot of hot food,” Robb said.
“I could go for some hot food,” Theon said.
“We’ll have to make sure he uses only above ingredients. Eating underworld food…it traps you here.”
“Why?”
“I don’t know. It just does,” Robb said. “Incidentally that’s how we got Hot Pie in the first place.”
Theon couldn’t hold back his laughter at that. He laughed so hard, in fact, he didn’t notice that Robb had led him to a cave until they were deep inside. “Where are we going now?”
“Watch,” Robb said softly.
Theon’s eyes went wide as suddenly the cave glowed with light. Robb was kneeling by the bit of the river that had flowed in, his fingers in the water.
“Robb Stark you are full of surprises,” Theon said.
“Not me. Look,” Robb said, nodding at the water.
There were fish. Brightly glowing fish. Hundreds.
“Gods,” Theon whispered, kneeling down beside him for a better look.
“They’re in the whole river, but this cave is really reflective,” Robb said. “From the crystals. I like to relax here.”
“It’s beautiful,” Theon said softly.
“So are you,” Robb replied.
“You were never a good liar, Robin—Robb,” Theon said, shaking his head.
“You are,” Robb insisted as the reflected light danced over them. “I know you’ve been hurt and yes you don’t look entirely like you used to. But when you smile at me…Theon, there’s nothing I’d rather see in the world.”
He couldn’t be serious. “You-you can’t be…are you serious?”
Robb nodded, “Why wouldn’t I be?”
He looked so ethereal in the dancing greens and blues that it made Theon want him quite badly, so badly he didn’t care to argue right now. “You’re very handsome yourself.”
“Thank you,” Robb said, gently sliding his hands over Theon’s shoulders. “I…I would like to…if you want?”
“In a cave? Robb Stark what kind of man do you think I am?” Theon asked in mock shock. “Because you are on the mark. Come here.”
Robb swept a foot back, knocking a small crystal into the river to re-startle the fish into glowing even as he took Theon’s cloak and spread it on the ground. “Lay down.”
Theon did as he was told, shivering as Robb sat back to let him slide his own trousers down.
“Just those, then?”
“It’s damn cold, Robb. You won’t get me naked in here for anything.”
“Maybe later,” Robb replied.
Theon could give him that, but for now he was a little more focused on giving himself.
And it was nothing like Ramsay had been. Robb was so gentle, so caring. So considerate of Theon’s current weak state. It was perfect.
Theon gasped Robb’s name as he came before falling back against the cave floor, Robb only just managing to fall beside instead of on top of him.
“I accept,” Theon murmured.
“What?” Robb asked.
“Your offer? I accept. I’ll stay. Forever.” If he could have Robb…that was worth the underworld. And the place certainly had its charms.
“Really?” Robb asked, sitting up. “You…really?”
He looked so excited. Theon reached up, gently stroking his cheek. “If you really want me.”
Robb’s expression softened, “Yes. Always. Now and always I will want you, Theon.”
Theon sat up, cupping Robb’s face. “Then yes. Yes now and yes always.”
Robb smiled, “Great. I…do you want a formal thing or…?”
“Thing? You mean wedding? Do I look like a bride to you?”
“Dressing you in fine things has some appeal,” Robb said vaguely.
“Well…no. Not really. I don’t want some…spectacle,” Theon said. “I…mean, unless…it’s something you’d like?”
“I’d like to get to show you off,” Robb said. “But I can do it later if you’d prefer. After we’re wed?”
“That would be better.” He’d probably be in better condition later on. He hoped, at least.
Robb grinned, “May I at least give you a wedding present?”
“And what’s that?” Theon asked.
Robb smiled wolfishly and it made a thrill run through Theon, “Justice.”
.o.o.o.
Theon had seemed a bit confused when they entered the throne room. Robb simply led him up the steps to the throne itself.
He took his crown—he still didn’t like it but he needed to look in command of this situation. However…there was something else he wanted to do.
As he held the crown he willed into his free hand something he’d imagined and had created years ago. A circlet appeared and he held it to Theon.
It only had three spires unlike his crown’s nine, and they were all in the front. But it was clearly a related crown.
“You can will jewelry into existence?” Theon asked incredulously.
“No. Gendry made it years ago,” Robb said. “When I was about to ask you the first time.”
Theon stared at it. “You…you were serious? That’s mine?”
Robb nodded, offering it. Theon bowed his head slightly and Robb gently slid it on.
Theon reached out and took his crown quickly, before giving Robb a small grin.
Robb nodded and at on his throne, letting Theon lean over and crown him. If that was how he got to put the thing every time he might not mind so much. He reached out and pulled Theon over so the thinner man was wedged beside him on the throne.
“So you’re really going to-?” Theon wondered.
“Yes. And I’ll let you do as you please,” Robb replied. “This is your show, Theon.”
Theon smiled softly and settled against Robb’s side.
It was mere moments later when Arya strode in, Gendry at her heels.
“You have him?” Robb asked.
“Yes,” she replied. “And I see you have him.”
“Thank you, Arya,” Robb said, shaking his head. “Bring him in.”
“Sandor! Jaqen!” Arya called. “We’re ready!”
Robb felt his eyes narrow as Arya’s larger henchmen dragged a burly man in. So this was who hurt his future spouse.
Sandor helpfully gave the man a hard shove, sending him to his knees in front of the throne.
“Ramsay, I presume?” Robb asked.
Ramsay looked up through his curtain of greasy black hair. At first he looked confused but then his eyes locked on Theon and he glared openly.
“Hello, Ramsay,” Theon said softly. His voice was admirably steady. “Do you know where you are?”
“No. It looks like my whore-oof!”
Sandor looked at the ceiling like he hadn’t just slammed his boot into Ramsay’s backside. Robb nodded approvingly at his antics.
“Don’t call me that again,” Theon said.
“Looks like you found someone new to answer to,” Ramsay spat.
“He does not answer to me,” Robb said. “But I will make sure you understand just what you’re in for, Ramsay. This is the underworld. You are already dead. My sister Arya smote you herself.”
“It was rather easy, too,” she bragged.
“Sister…?” Ramsay said, his eyes widening as he processed the name. “You’re the lord of the dead.”
“And you kidnapped my beloved,” Robb said. “You can see why my mood’s rather poor.”
He felt Theon grab his chin and turned so the other man could kiss him firmly. Theon turned back to Ramsay with a wonderfully wicked grin, “Do you know what I’m going to do to you, Ramsay?”
“No,” Ramsay admitted warily, eyeing Gendry and Arya.
“I’m going to make sure you burn in the deepest, darkest pit there is,” Theon said calmly. “And then? Then I’ll forget you ever existed.”
“I don’t think it’ll be so easy,” Ramsay said. “You’ll remember me every time you look at your left hand.”
Robb went to stand, to attack him, but that same maimed hand splayed on his chest, holding him back.
“No. I won’t,” Theon said. “Because I’ll have eternity to forget. And as you’re writhing in pain until the end of time I want you to know that I won’t even know or care why anymore. Just like you didn’t care when you hurt me. Won’t that be fun?”
Going by how Ramsay’s eyes went wide, Robb had to guess that Ramsay had called his own treatment of Theon “fun” more than once.
“Do what you want,” Theon said, rather intentionally lazing against Robb’s side. “I don’t care anymore.”
“You can’t do this! You wretched little slut, Reek, I swear-”
Gendry slammed his hammer against the floor and the tiles fell away to reveal a gaping pit. Ramsay dropped, still screaming.
Seconds later the floor was back as if nothing had happened. Given the theme of Theon’s little act, it was quite fitting.
Theon outright fell against him now, shuddering slightly.
“What’s your favorite food?” Arya demanded.
“What?” Theon asked.
“Favorite food?” she repeated.
“Fish. Especially trout,” Theon said.
“Great. Robb, trout for dinner,” she said, turning on her heal to leave. Clearly she was going to talk to Hot Pie. Gendry, Sandor, and Jaqen followed her, though Jaqen paused at the door.
“That was excellent acting by a man,” he told Theon, smirking.
Theon nodded. “Thank you.”
Jaqen left, shutting the door behind him.
“Are you all right?” Robb asked.
“I’ll be fine…gods I can’t believe….it’s really over?” Theon asked hopefully.
“Yes. Theon…did he…did he call you Reek?”
“He tried to make me think it was my name. It’s fine, it’s over” Theon said, not looking at him.
Robb’s blood boiled. “You were too kind.”
“Too kind? Robb, don’t you see?” Theon laughed. “If I did some big, over-the-top punishment he could congratulate himself that he’d really gotten me, that even as the lover of a god I’d remember him. No, being forgotten is what will hurt him.”
That was actually rather brilliant, “I should defer some plans to you, it seems.”
“If planning is what you’d have me do, so be it,” Theon said. “Thank you for the gift. It was very nice.”
Robb pulled Theon into his lap, “I’m glad you liked it.”
Theon leaned in and kissed him, “So, you said there was a way for me to stay forever, then?”
“After dinner. I’ll need some time to put it together,” Robb replied.
.o.o.o.
The table was a slab of oval steel held up by dark stone pillars.
“You like it? Made it myself,” Gendry bragged when he saw Theon inspecting it.
“I was told you made this too,” Theon said, tapping his circlet.
“He makes a lot of the things down here,” Arya said casually. “Weapons, armor, decorations…really whenever he’s not out working he’s making something or other.”
“At least I have a hobby,” Gendry told her.
“A girl has a hobby. It is annoying a girl’s brother,” Jaqen said. “And anyone else a girl might encounter.”
Arya narrowed her eyes at him dangerously but he only smiled.
“They’re not usually all here,” Robb groaned. “I promise.”
“It’s fine,” Theon assured him. “Really.”
He’d never had this sort of…normalcy in his life. Family dinners back on Pyke constantly broke into fights and really the most normal dinners he’d ever had had been with Robb anyway.
A heavyset young man—whom Theon could only assume was Hot Pie—bustled in with two large trays of fish.
“Finally,” Sandor said. “You have trouble in the kitchen?”
“I only know so many ways took cook trout, and I had to wait for the oven to warm up properly, and bunch of other things you don’t care about,” Hot Pie replied, putting the trays down before taking his seat.
“Good point. I don’t care,” Sandor said, seizing some fish at once.
“Here,” Robb said, getting some for Theon. “You look like you could use it.”
“Thanks,” he said, taking his utensils and cutting it down into pieces his broken teeth could reliable handle.
“Remember what I said. About the food here,” Robb warned him softly.
“I remember.” If he ate this, he would not be able to leave. Would not be able to be taken away.
“It’s good,” he told Hot Pie after he swallowed. The cook grinned proudly, elbowing Gendry. Gendry shot him a confused look instead.
Something cool seemed to flow through Theon, like ice in his veins. But it didn’t hurt it felt…rather welcoming actually. He leaned back in his chair as the feeling worked throughout his body.
“A man is stuck with a group now,” Jaqen chuckled.
“Yes, he’s ours. Mostly mine,” Robb said and Theon felt one of Robb’s hand slide around between his waist and the chair to rest on his hip. “In fact almost entirely mine.”
“Greedy thing. Don’t we get to know the new man?” Arya asked, smirking.
“Maybe later,” Robb replied, squeezing Theon’s hip.
Theon noted that he felt warmer now. That the pervading chill of the underworld wasn’t so strong. Even Robb’s hand no longer felt quite so cool.
The rest of the dinner conversation seemed to simply be about schedules and how long Robb was running things next week and how long he was doing other things and Arya had to watch things here for him. Theon was more focused on the food, really. Robb had picked a good chef in his sister’s henchman, it seemed.
As Jaqen and Sandor wandered off in search of alcohol and Arya dragged Gendry and Hot Pie off to “go demon hunting,” Robb took Theon’s hand, “Want to go back to our room?”
Their room. Right. “Yes.”
Robb offered Theon his hand and Theon took it as he stood, only to yelp as Robb used the grip to swing Theon up into his arms. “Hey!”
“Last time we went to our room you messed up your feet. I don’t want that to happen again,” Robb said.
“You’re a poor liar, Robb. You didn’t think much of my feet when you were giving me to tour, did you?”
“Well, no,” Robb admitted.
“You just want to carry me?”
“You are my bride.”
“I said it in the cave, do I look like a bride to you?”
“And I only didn’t say yes outright because it would have ruined the mood.”
Damn. Robb had him there.
“Please, Theon?”
“All right, all right,” Theon muttered, smirking slightly as Robb kissed him.
“Come, it should be ready,” Robb said as they entered.
“Ready?” Theon asked as he was set on the bed. “What’s ready?”
“Ambrosia,” Robb said. “The substance of immortality.”
Theon paused. He and Robb had spoken of eternity a few times now but…immortality would always be a heady concept. “I guess…it just surprises me that you’ll want me for that long…”
“I spent years getting to know you because I didn’t want to mess this up,” Robb replied. “To be sure we wouldn’t end up hating each other or something…”
He opened a cabinet and pulled out a glowing cup.
“You just have that lying around?”
“Hardly. My siblings and I all have a cabinet like this and they’re linked together so we can send each other things easily. Oh, and there’s a note,” Robb said, chuckling.
Theon took it and scanned it. Robb seriously if this is for the person you were pining over for years I’d better get to meet them in pretty short order. I mean, you’re keeping romance from me? Sansa.
“Your sister is the goddess of love. Of course,” Theon chuckled.
“Well, with the same last name, it better be that she’s my sister,” Robb replied.
Theon laughed, only to still as Robb looped an arm around him. “So I just…drink it?”
“Not yet,” Robb said, unsheathing a knife from his belt. “It needs to know who it’s for.”
“So it needs your blood?” Theon asked and Robb held his hand over the cup.
“No. We both have to mix our blood,” Robb said, pricking his finger and letting it drop into the drink. “If it’s just mine then you’ll be my servant, not my equal. I want you my equal.”
Theon smiled softly, “You don’t have to do that. I…I’m not…”
“You’re mine. And I will be yours,” Robb said, taking Theon’s hand and pricking his finger.
The blood mingled with Robb’s in the ambrosia. Robb covered it with his hand. “Last chance, Theon. You drink this and you’re bound to me forever. My bride for eternity.”
“Where’s the downside?” Theon joked. He leaned forward and kissed Robb. “Give me the cup.”
.o.o.o.
Legends of the Robb Stark, God of the Underworld were altered around 317 AC to include mentions of the Lord’s wife* Theon, God of Archery and Persevering Through Suffering. Most legends say that Theon was once a mortal whom Robb wished to wed and was kidnapped on the eve of their wedding by a demon. He was tortured for years until Robb found him again and brought him to the Underworld and made him his bride.
Most depictions of Theon show him as a thin but relatively handsome man, though missing fingers as a result of his captivity. Some nudes have shown him missing toes as well. He is often portrayed holding a strung bow and carrying a full quiver. It is believed that praying to him will aid in recovering a missing loved one, finding a lost child, and guiding one’s aim.
* While more modern works refer to Theon as Robb’s husband, older ones specifically use the term wife. All works still refer to him as a 'bride,' however, given the constant use of that term in original texts. See also: “The Tale of Renly and Loras”