Chapter Text
Levi glanced at Hanji pensively, thinking the evening could still be saved if he just found the right words to say, in order to break the unbearable, uncomfortable silence that had made itself present between them. In retrospect, it was his own fault for trying to initiate physical intimacy when clearly neither of them was ready yet, resulting in a failure of a kiss that left a bleeding lip on Hanji and a noticeable bump on his own forehead.
Not that the situation improved much afterward, when he put a hand on Hanji’s breast because it seemed like a good idea at the time to get things moving but then his hand just stayed there as he glared at Hanji and she stared blankly back at him and neither of them said a word. Levi had tried thinking of everything, from attacking Titans to dirty, messy floors in order to make his hand move but his whole body decided to fucking screw him over so Hanji, in a misguided attempt to even the playing field, put her own hand on his crotch.
And then they stood in that ridiculous position for a good, painful few minutes that Levi would gladly permanently erase from his memory. Hanji wasn’t even looking at him at that point, opting to stare at something over his head while beads of sweat rolled down the side of her face.
Eventually they both managed to remove their hands from where they were awkwardly placed on each other’s intimate parts, thanks to Moblit’s timely knocking on Hanji’s door, the sudden interruption making them jump away from each other in surprise. Moblit (red-faced and apologetic after seeing Levi inside) hurried away soon after and they were left alone again.
Levi crossed his arms and watched as Hanji idly rocked back and forth on her heels. She caught his eye and smiled nonchalantly at him, as if they didn’t just experience the most awkward moments of their fucking lives. It bothered him, because ever since his haphazard confession a month ago when Hanji was grievously injured during an expedition, they were supposed to be in a relationship. Yet both of them found the transition from comrades to lovers a lot more difficult than they anticipated, and it irritated Levi more than he was willing to admit.
“Stop looking at me as if you’re fucking constipated.” Levi regretted the words that came out of his mouth as soon as he said it because they were hardly any sort of representation of his true feelings at the moment, but a mixture of habit and a natural lack of social graces made it impossible for him to say anything more appropriate.
If it was anyone else, Levi would have made a hasty and rude exit, not wishing to witness the subsequent reaction to his failed attempt at salvaging an intimate moment. But this was Hanji, and she went along with it by leaning back against the door and laughing, replying shamelessly that he may have had a point considering she hadn’t taken a dump for some time.
Levi knew Hanji only played along for his sake, like all the other times romantic sentiments on the tip of his tongue turned into crude fecal references, and he would be damned before he even considered telling her out loud but he was grateful for it.
“Let’s go to your lab and you can tell me about the results from today’s experiments with those gross Titan test subjects of yours.” Levi said abruptly, nudging Hanji away from the door so he could reach the handle.
Hanji gaped at him. “Really? You want to know?”
“Yes.” In truth, he wasn’t particularly keen on spending the night listening to Hanji’s long winded science monologues, although deep down Levi admitted that there was something strangely charming about the way Hanji’s face lit up when she rambled about something she was passionate about.
Hanji clapped her hands together in glee, her eyes widening in utter excitement. “I can’t wait to tell you what the effect of piercing Bean’s eyes with a pitchfork had on him! First we tried it on Sawney, who barely reacted when we…”
Hanji was so engrossed in telling her tale that Levi wondered if she even noticed that he had taken hold of her hand to prevent her from walking into a wall. As he watched her happily chatter away out of the corner of his eye, his fingers tightened around her own and he thought that for now, they were fine just the way they were.