Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

You found the quiet that settled in the training fields of Jujutsu Tech to be unnerving, to say the least. Was it because you were used to the boisterous sound of Nobara’s laughter as she fought off Panda? Or Maki and Megumi’s soft-spoken conversations? Even Toge’s occasional replies of rice ball ingredients was a welcome distraction compared to right now.

Right now, you just felt how alone you were.

“So, that’s that.” Gojo finishes his explanation to a quiet crowd. His tone was serious, and you would have assumed it was because of the missions he had just given the others, but not this time around.

“But, Gojo-sensei…” you hear Nobara’s voice crack at the end of her unfinished sentence.

You feel their stares before you see it. You didn’t want to see how they were looking at you. You didn’t want to lift your head and see the same eyes that you’d expect to be looking over your remains in a few days.

If they even bothered to leave anything behind, that is.

Steeling your nerves, you look up, wanting to give them a grin, but you only manage a small smile for reassurance.

“What’s that look for?” you cover up a choked sob with a laugh. “You guys said we’d visit that hedgehog café when Yuuta-senpai gets back. I’d hate to go there with any of you missing, got it? So don’t worry about me. And be careful out there.”

There’s a pause and the tension disappears. For the most part, anyway, but you’ll take what you were given.

“Don’t hold your breath,” Maki winks at you, raising her wooden staff with a grin. "We'll be back before you know it, (Y/N). And when we do we're gonna pet so many hedgehogs it's going to hurt but I'll make damn sure it's worth it."

"You do know you wear gloves when you handle the hedgehogs, right?" you're used to Megumi's chiding tone , but the rare smile he has on his face makes you feel warm.

"What? Really?" the laugh that leaves you because of the look on Nobara's face is genuine and her eyes turn to you, sparkling. "Well, that just takes out the joy of the experience, right, (Y/N)?"

"Oh, definitely," you laugh like never before.

Fuck, you were going to miss this. So, so much.

"Salted salmon roe," Toge nods at you and Nobara in agreement.

"Alright, then," Panda softly pats the top of your head. You ignore the sudden spike of fear you sense when you turn to him with a soft smile. You pretend not to think too much about when he pulls back his paw. You don't think, you don't think. "We'd better get going if we want to be back in time."

"Hmm? Panda-senpai, you were coming with us to the café?" Megumi fixes the panda a blank look and the offended look on your second-year's fluffy face makes you laugh again. Why did everything sound so funny right now? 

"O-of course, I am!" Panda looks back at you, all confidence and fear  he had earlier gone. "(Y/N), you wanted us all together there, right?"

You grin easily. "We'll sneak out a hedgehog for you." 

What would you do without them, really?

"Alright, time for you guys to head out," Gojo claps his hands together. "You're burning daylight."

"Huh?" you turn to your teacher, eyes wide. "You're not going with them, Gojo-sensei?" 

"Oh, of course not~" he grins, but his smile drops when he notices the rest of your group glaring at him. He strides over and hides behind you, which meant jack shit since he was practically two times taller. "What? I've been doing all your assignments in the last two days so you could spend time with (Y/N)! I want my turn, too!" 

"Gojo-sensei…" the look on their faces can only be described as murderous.

The others glare at him for a second more before they turn and head back to the school proper to change into their uniforms. You hear your teacher let out a sigh of relief from behind you before it was rudely interrupted by Maki's sharp voice cutting through the peace.

"All in agreement that Gojo-sensei isn't coming with us to the hedgehog café say ‘aye'." 

"Aye."

"Bonito flakes."

"Oi, wait a minute!" Gojo calls out, but no one turns back around to acknowledge him. "You guy's don't get to decide that! (Y/N), does!"

When they're gone, you find Gojo smiling down at you.

"So, anywhere you'd like to go, (Y/N)? I know this really good bakery by the station. They have this cheesecake special that only comes around this time of the year and you're going to try it. No takes-backsies," he grins at you triumphantly, but you had no plans of saying no to any of them.

And suddenly he's quiet, and you fear what he was going to say. You don't want him or any one of them to say anything about tomorrow or the day after. Talking about the future felt like a slap to the face when you didn’t know how long you had left.

"Gojo…sensei?" you consider waving a hand over his face, but suddenly he snaps right back up. "Wh-"

"I forgot to ask permission to take you out the school," he looks down at you, his mouth slightly agape, before he's rounding the corner back to the school. "Give me a second, (Y/N)! Tell me where you want to go when I get back."

He's not gone for a second more before you feel your mouth open.

"People who don't mean what they say should keep their mouths shut," anyone who heard Sukuna would say he sounded rather nonchalant than usual, but you knew better. Or felt better - because now, whatever he felt, you'd feel as your own emotions, too.

It was stifled anger this time around.

"Hey, it's not their fault they had to leave for a mission," these days, whenever you spoke, it felt like you were one half of a puppet show. But instead of two puppets and a single puppeteer, there were two of you controlling a single puppet. "It's part of the-"

"I wasn't talking about them, brat."

You don't answer him.

You don’t want to think the anger as your own.

Would it be selfish to ask for more time with them? You breathe out, counting down the seconds you still could.

The sun peaking overhead past the leaves shone down on your form, warming you against the chilly breezes that picked up every so often. But you don't feel the breeze nor the sunshine nor the grass underneath your fingertips as well as you could have.

Your whole body is covered with protective talismans, trying to keep Sukuna trapped until they were fully prepared to exorcise you. You knew they didn't have a choice or Sukuna would've taken control of your body a few fingers back, but it hurt having to go about your last days like a walking mummy. Like you were already dead.

You sigh. It was too good a day to die.

"Gojo-sensei's taking his time," you mumble to yourself, trying to fill the quiet with something. "Thought he'd be faster since he sounded really excited about eating cheesecake."

"If you're going to think about him, then just go look for him," this time, Sukuna doesn't take control of your mouth.

Instead, your vision blurs to red and he's in front of you, lying down on the grass on his side, head propped up with one arm and glaring at you. He's not solid, no, it's more so his soul taking form in the physical world, which just spoke to how powerful he was now with all 20 of his fingers.

"I don't want to listen to you talk about him. The fucker's annoying enough as it is."

You blink. How could you forget? You haven't been alone for a long time now.

"You've been quiet these past few days," you lightly smile at him and Sukuna responds with a smirk. "Should I be worried?"

"What? Aren't you thankful I'm letting you live out your last days peacefully?" he flicks a finger downwards and you're confused until you realize a second too late that you were already lying down on the grass. You try to prop yourself up by your arms, but your body is stiff and aching. You look up at Sukuna, halfway into asking for help, but you only see him looking down at you with a smugger smirk and you let yourself go limp. Petty fucker just wanted to look down at you while he was lying down, okay then. "You need to learn when to be thankful, brat. I can't keep reminding you. But I guess there's not much use in that now."

"Yep, definitely too late for that," you sigh and then pause. Sukuna's eyes are closed and he looks like he's halfway into a nap. "What about you, Sukuna?"

"Be more specific, brat. It's a chore having to think twice as hard for your sake." he opens a single eye to look at you condescendingly. You roll your eyes and almost laugh when he opens all four to glare at you.

"Is there anything you want to do?" you know you've made a grave mistake when he grins.

"Give me control-"

"Except that," you sigh exasperatedly. Sukuna's hold on your body loosens ever so slightly and it's enough for you to adjust and comfortably lie down on your side. "You know I can't do that."

There's a pause. You expect him to laugh, something about a human daring to tell him what to do.

"Oh?" when you turn your head to him, the look on Sukuna's face is murderous and for a second you swear the very air stills. His red eyes are trained on you, daring you to question him. "You think you can still suppress me, brat?" 

You frown at him, long past afraid. The paper talismans that covered your body seemed to burn your skin. When you answer, your voice is soft. "…You and I both know I can't do that anymore…"

He holds your stare for a few seconds more before he smiles, content. He hums in approval and it's like the world never stopped for him.

"What the fuck was that for?" you grumble, but he hears you as clear as ever.

"Let's say…" he grins at your devilishly. "I was testing you, brat."

"...The fuck?" you look at him incredulously, but he just shrugs and closes his eyes again.

Something told you you knew what he was trying to do, though. Maybe another shared feeling or you were just so used to his bullshit: He was just reaffirming it to you. It was enough you understood. He didn't need to dig it in.

Petty.

"That place we went to last time with the other brats. The one where you cook the food yourself," Sukuna opens his eyes to look at you, his face expressionless and unreadable even for you. "Take me there. You know how I like my food cooked. And their meat is good." 

You pause before you manage a small laugh and a smile. Something about Sukuna asking for something so simple amused you. "Got it."

You open your mouth to say something else, but just over Sukuna's shoulder, you see Gojo and Principal Yaga walking over to you. Even if you don't hear them, your whole body goes cold. Was it the hushed tones or the lack of a smile on your cheerful teacher's face? Whenever you saw them or any of the higher-ups these days, you felt like throwing up.

When Gojo catches you staring, he's immediately all smiles again. He waves at you and you manage to give a small one back. When he turns back to the Principal, you force your eyes to tear away from them. But you end up meeting four red eyes, already staring daggers into your soul.

"Are you scared of dying?"

"What kind of question is that?" the words leave your lips like a whisper. Or maybe a prayer. You think he’s joking, but his face is blank. "Just… just a little bit." 

You don't hear Gojo's footsteps getting closer even when you see him walking towards you from the corner of your eye.

"(Y/N). There's no point in you being scared of dying. The afterlife doesn't deserve the likes of you," for a second time, you swear the world stops for him. All you can hear is his voice. His stare holds you in place. "Your fear is misplaced. The one thing you should be afraid of is me."

Was it the fact that he sounded so sure of himself? Or was it his words? But by the time Gojo gets to you, the sick feeling you had felt earlier dissipates like a nightmare.

Gojo stands just centimeters away from Sukuna's head, almost like he knew he was there. When Sukuna's eyes move to turn to look at Gojo, your eyes follow instinctively to look at your teacher. Sukuna disappears from your peripheral.

"Something wrong, (Y/N)?" Gojo crouches down, trying to get a read of your expression.

"No, no, it's nothing," you laugh awkwardly and when you sit up, there's nothing weighing you down. "I think I sort of fell asleep."

There's a pause where he just looks at you. But the moment passes and he's standing up and holding out a hand.

"So, did you think of anywhere you wanted to go?" Gojo pulls you up, smiling at you without a care in the world. You were jealous at the sight of it, but just as you think it, the guilt gnaws at your soul.

"I haven't had breakfast yet, so I wanted to eat at this Korean restaurant the others took me to before."

"Alright, then, brunch it is." he gives you a grin and a thumbs up. "After that, cheesecake!"

You laugh, and for a second everything is fine. But Principal Yaga steps in front of the two of you and the cold that runs up your whole body is unmistakable. You’re surprised when you wish Sukuna didn't leave you.

"Principal, come on, let me just-" Gojo stops when his superior raises a hand to silence him. You watch as the smile Gojo just had on his face slips. You have half a thought to call out to Sukuna.

"(L/N) (Y/N), your exorcism will commence tomorrow." 

Ah. Guess it was time to close the curtains on your puppet show.

＝＝✿＝＝｜✧••❀••✧｜＝＝✿＝＝

Your breath comes out in clouds as you tiptoe through the grassy floors of the forest surrounding Jujutsu Tech. The morning dew clings to your bare feet, but you welcome the cold and discomfort. After all, this is the first time in months you’re out and about without your talismans.

It’s going to be your last, too.

You stop when you reach a running river cutting through your path. You could easily cross it, but that would be going past the borders of the school. It would probably alert a teacher, especially with cursed energy palpitating from your very being so strongly. And alerting anyone that you were outside, unaccounted for, was the last thing you wanted right now. You kneel at the river’s edge, holding out a hand to the rushing water and relishing the current.

The black markings circling your wrist are reflected in the water. You almost forgot they were there, with the talismans hiding you from the world. Now that you thought about it, that was one of the reasons they “asked” you to wear them - the higher-ups hated seeing Sukuna’s markings so much they would’ve forced it on you if you tried to refuse. Their words and glares hurt more than the actual markings - you can still remember the smell of your own skin burning as they made their way up to the surface. You haven’t looked at a mirror properly since.

You look at your reflection in the water, tracing the markings on your face with your eyes. Your reflection blinks and you hear the voice before you completely see him.

“What’s this? Did you finally grow some brain cells and decide to escape? Not bad, brat. I would’ve said I was proud, but,” the voice is colder than the early morning air and the running stream. You meet Sukuna’s eyes reflected in the water, eyes gleaming with mirth. Were you more him? Or was he more you? You don’t think you can stomach the answer. “It would be too good to be true.”

“Of course not, dummy,” you lean back with a soft laugh, and when you turn to your side, you meet annoyed red eyes. Sukuna raises an arm to hit the back of your head, but you duck, and you don’t mention how he doesn’t try again. “I can’t leave them now. I’d feel bad.”

“Your feelings are meaningless. It’s not like they share your sentiments,” he scoffs, crossing his legs and sitting beside you. He turns to you with a cruel smirk, and you can’t remember if you had his sharpened teeth, too. “So why should you care about them? I’ll even help you escape, brat. Cross this river, and not even that Six Eyes bastard will be able to tell where we go, trust me. How about it?”

There’s a pause as he waits for your answer. You shift in your seat, dipping your feet in the water, and you hear the curse beside you suck in a breath. A chill runs down your spine at the cold, but it’s nothing compared to when Sukuna leans impossibly closer, the cursed energy surrounding him almost suffocating if not familiar. You can see the excited glint of his eyes as he watches your every move, waiting for you to stand up and cross. But then the chill passes as your feet grow accustomed to the cold and you turn to him with a satisfied smile.

This time, his fist connects with the back of your head, followed soon after by a rough jab to your side. Sukuna leans back, expression disgusted as he watches you groan and curl into yourself.  

“Play me like that again and I’ll let the fishes take turns with your flesh,” he looks like he’s going to hit you again, but seems to think twice about it and settles for glaring at you, crossing his arms into the sleeve of his robes. “I even offered to help you escape and you get me excited for nothing, you ungrateful little shit.”

“I told you I’d feel bad for leaving them now,” you lie down on the grass, the blades pricking at your back, partially hoping he can’t hit you anymore. “I don’t feel bad for letting you down, though.”  

When you turn to him, Sukuna’s eyes are closed. Feigning sleep, and most likely trying to forget your presence. The sight reminds you of your conversation in the training field.

“Right, about what you said earlier,” you wait for him to let you know he was listening, but you’re not surprised when he remains quiet. “What did you mean you were “testing” me? What for?”

The silence stretches, and you think you’re not getting an answer. But Sukuna opens his eyes, staring at the river thoughtfully a second more before he turns to you, his face unreadable.

“Tell me what you wanted to do in the future.”

You blink. “What I wanted… to do…?”

“Your goals. Dreams. Whatever it is you shitty humans call it,” Sukuna rolls his eyes before he turns his body to completely face your form, looking down at you with a frown. “Don’t make me repeat myself.”

“Why should I?” you frown back. “You didn’t even answer my question.”

“If I told you it had something to do with that test I mentioned, would you answer?” he scoffs before he smirks. “Maybe I’m considering fulfilling them for you, brat. Or maybe I just feel like laughing at your answer. Who knows? You should be grateful I’m giving you the time of day when you’re about to die.”

You sit up, eyes not leaving Sukuna’s leveled stare.

“You sound oddly sure that you’re going to live. I’ve been wondering, why haven’t you tried to take control of my body this whole time? I don’t have those talismans right now,” your voice comes out like a whisper. When you frown at him, Sukuna smirks in response. “What are you planning, Sukuna?”

He leans in, forehead practically touching yours. It felt like looking at a mirror again. Was he more you? Or were you more him?  

“What body? The one you can’t control? If you can’t hold me back anymore, what makes you think some pieces of paper could? What I plan on doing doesn’t need your opinion. You tattling on me isn’t a threat, either, not when those sorcerers can’t tell anymore which face they’re talking to,” he whispers, smirk widening as your frown deepens. When he leans back, his smile is satisfied. “It doesn’t matter to me, really, if you answer or not. But I can say it is in your best interest. So for once, think wisely, brat.”

You stare at him, trying to read his face, and when that fails, you try to read his soul. As far as you could tell, there was no malicious intent. Or was he locking you out? You look away, almost dejected.

My best interest? You frown at the ground, pulling on clumps of grass absentmindedly. Bullshit.

But he’s not wrong when he says you can’t do anything about it now. No matter what you said, they won’t bother pushing back your execution. If anything, it would cement the belief they needed to kill you sooner than ever. What could Sukuna do once he was already dead, after all? And as far as they were concerned, you were already a dead man.

You sigh. My dreams, huh?

Now that you thought about it, you never did think about what you wanted to do in the future. You just thought you’d go along with the flow, wherever life took you to. You didn’t realize it would take you here.

Maybe it was for the best you never thought of what you wanted in the future. Can’t miss what you never had, right?

“I wanted to travel. See the world, and all that,” your voice is soft. It was a small dream, but you figured it would suffice as an answer. It was something no one else knew. You didn’t need to tell your grandfather that when he was on his deathbed. And the people you were leaving behind didn’t need to know what could never be. “Like, there’s this flower field in-”

“That’s it?” Sukuna cuts in with a scoff. “You wanted to go sightseeing? I didn’t think you could get any more boring, brat, but holy shit.”

There’s a pause and you laugh. Maybe it was the lack of empathy and sentiments, but you preferred his response. One without pity. One that didn’t feel like an apology. One that didn’t feel like you were saying goodbye.

“Asshole, you said you’d try to fulfill it for me, would you prefer if said I wanted to be a doctor or something? I tried thinking about you when I answered and you go ahead and shit all over it,” you try to frown at him, but it’s not menacing at all when you laugh more. Sukuna seems to think about your words, but his eyes are still judging. “I grew up in the countryside, okay? Can you blame me for wanting to see more of the world?”

“It’s still a shitty dream.” Sukuna shrugs, the look on his face saying he should have never asked. “And I said I’m considering fulfilling it.”

You roll your eyes with another laugh. “Thanks, Sukuna.”

The smile slips from your face when you find yourself breathless. You feel your soul disappear a little more, and when you catch four glowing red eyes looking down at you, you know he can feel it, too. The weaker you get, the stronger he is. You groan.

“Speak up, brat, I can’t hear you,” Sukuna clicks his tongue.

“Go back. I… have to go back,” you try to stand on unsteady feet, but your knees buckle and you go down. The smell of earth and rain does little to make you feel better. You didn’t want to leave yet. “They can’t find out I left my room.”

You try to push yourself up again, but you stop when Sukuna lets out a single laugh. When you turn to him, he’s watching you.

His breath comes out in puffs of smoke. Warm. Alive.

But not completely yet. Does his form flicker? Or does your sight get blurry?

“Who said we’re still in your shitty school, brat?” his voice is so uncharacteristically soft it’s mocking. Sukuna’s smile would be serene but the shadows that play over his face make it look sinister. He holds a hand over your eyes. “We’re already on the other side.”

When you try to open them, you find that you can’t. There was an inexplicable weight over them, keeping them closed, but it didn’t feel warm like Sukuna’s hand. The sound of the running river and the forest slowly disappear, almost like you’re drifting down the stream, until it’s silent with the exception of a crackling flame.

Your stomach drops. It’s all coming back to you.

You never left your room. You were never able to.

Someone tugs off the blindfold over your eyes and you’re blinded by the sudden rush of light.

“You awake, (Y/N)?”

You wait for your eyes to adjust. Covered from floor to ceiling with talismans and lit by nothing but candles scattered about, you would’ve been in awe from nostalgia. But this wasn’t the past. Even with your mummified body, the ropes digging at your arms, digging at your neck, digging at your ankles, digging at your soul is all too real. Even with your teacher sitting on a chair in front of you, your heart sinks. This wasn’t like before. He didn’t need to take off his blindfold to keep you in check the first time.

What would you give to go back to the very start, if only to avoid the end?

“Good morning,” he smiles softly and the laugh that escapes your lips sounds more scathing than you intended. His eyes drop to the floor for a second, and the guilt eats at you again. He was the only one here, you want to be grateful, but you can’t.

You don’t try to mend the tension. You miss the others and how they lift your mood as you did to them. It was for the best you don’t get to say goodbye. You don’t think you can.

“Let’s get this over with,” you laugh softly, but it felt more like a sigh.

Tired. So, so tired. Were you just dreaming earlier? You felt like you were rudely awakened from a good nap, and now you just wanted nothing more but to go back to sleep.

Was it because of the countless charms trying to subdue your body or was it the curse they were trying to keep in? The exhaustion is overwhelming. You close your eyes, hoping to go back to sleep. But if Gojo was here, then that means it’s time.

“Here.”

Your eyes flutter back open and focus on Gojo’s outstretched hand.

“A… pill?” you blink at the single tablet on his palm.

“A sleeping pill. Since you’re human right now, and in essence so is Sukuna, there’s no point in doing a grand exorcism. This pill is infused with enough cursed energy to kill every curse in Japan,” he pauses, and your gut wrenches as he tries to smile. He can’t meet your eyes and you can’t meet his efforts in a better farewell. “And, well, I wanted this to be as painless for you as possible.”

As quick and painless as going to sleep.

“Thanks, Gojo-sensei,” you mean it, but you think your gratitude isn’t an act of good right now.

He barely chokes down a sob by clearing his throat. “I’m sorry I couldn’t-”

“It’s okay. Really.” at this point, you feel like you could slip back to sleep without the need for a sleeping pill and you’d never notice if they killed you just like any other curse. “You’ve done more than enough.”

You open your mouth readily. Gojo hesitates for only a split second before the pill goes down your throat. You find it more bitter than the twenty digits you’ve swallowed in the past year.

“I’ll be outside,” he breathes in a shaky sigh. “I’ll know when you’re asleep.”

“Got it.” your mouth feels numb.

“C’mere, kid,” when Gojo hugs you, you feel like you’re not all there anymore. Already in a dream.

You can’t remember if you say anything else or not. When you blink, he’s no longer there, or the chair he was sitting on just moments before. You feel cold. It’s a chore to keep your eyes open. How long have you been here?

“Hey, Sukuna…?” you don’t expect an answer. You don’t know who’s supposed to die first - him or you.

“What is it now, brat.”

Was that forest from earlier a dream or not? You wish you could go back. If just to fall asleep there.

“Let’s go see the world together someday, okay?”

When Sukuna laughs, it sounds far away. Like you were hearing it from across the room. Or across the world. “You really think I still want to go anywhere with you, brat? It was annoying as fuck following you around like this. What makes you think I want to do it again?”

“Well, sure, it was pretty annoying,” you’re amazed when you manage a small laugh. “But I thought it was still fun.”

“Just go to sleep, brat.”

You’re not sure whether you see the river from your dreams again or you’re crying. “Good night, Sukuna.”

The grass has never felt more comforting.

＝＝✿＝＝｜✧••❀••✧｜＝＝✿＝＝

He wanted to thank you. He truly did.

But not only were you dead, but you wouldn’t be able to remember what he was talking about.

After all, it was part of the pact that you’d forget his end of the deal, right?

“Come on, now. Is that the best you’ve got?”

Gojo was having trouble standing up. Maybe it was the burning building and all the smoke trapped in the room. It was getting harder to see, much less breathe. Or maybe it was because half his ribs were fractured. Funny, didn’t he know reversed cursed techniques?

“I thought you were going to kill me? Or are you finding it hard to kill me because of the brat?” Sukuna’s laughter sounds more like a roar. The smoke burns his lungs, but the feeling just makes him laugh harder. “Don’t worry, you already killed them. They’re not coming back.”

Sukuna doesn’t miss the way Gojo flinches at his words. So it really was because of you? Pathetic. What point was there to be sorry to someone who wasn’t around anymore?

Sukuna catches his reflection in a broken window. His hair is the same shade as yours and two of his eyes that stare back are (e/c). He grins, and your likeness blurs in the edges of his wilder features.

No wonder the bastard is hesitating.

It didn’t really matter if he looked a bit like you right now, though. Just a mere effect of merging completely with your body. Pretty soon, there wouldn’t be anything left of you to remember when he’d see himself in a mirror.

There wouldn’t be anyone around to remember you, either.

“Do your best to kill me, now. Wasn’t that the plan? Or did you just want to kill the brat?” Sukuna’s grin widens when Gojo glares at him, despite one eye already wounded shut. “I don’t blame you, but that would’ve broken little (Y/N)’s heart. If you hadn’t made it stop beating, that is.”

“I’d appreciate it if you didn’t say my student’s name so casually,” Gojo laughs, his chest heaving at the effort. “It’s disrespectful when it’s coming from your mouth. I don’t want you tainting (Y/N)’s memory.”

“Disrespectful? If we’re talking disrespectful, then let’s talk about how the brat was so scared of dying and you couldn’t even finish the job properly,” Sukuna whistles. “Now that’s disrespectful. I wonder what they would have said?”

Gojo raises a hand and Sukuna smiles lazily when the smoke scatters from his technique. The room glows red and everything is burning at once. The explosion makes the air vibrate.

“Oh, that’s right. The brat never told you.”

Gojo grits his teeth. Sukuna was stretching his limbs as he basked in the sunlight. His form doesn’t flicker, not in the way Gojo had seen sometimes as you walked, the curse following close in your wake like a ghost.

You weren’t here anymore, and your body was not yours.

“Tell me what?” If Gojo was thankful for anything, it would be that your classmates and upperclassmen weren’t here to see this. They were most likely being called back from their missions, along with those from Kyoto for back up. “If you’re trying to say you were closer to (Y/N) than the rest of us, of course you are. You were living rent-free in their body for a whole year or so, after all.”

“They didn’t want you to feel bad when you finally murdered them,” Sukuna continues, like he never heard Gojo. “So it should be okay to tell you now since they’re dead. So listen up.”

When Sukuna turns back to Gojo without a smirk or a grin, Gojo could’ve believed it really was you. The soft (e/c) eyes. (H/C) locks he’d ruffle for a job well done. The small smile when you’d look his way. The tattoos that were forced upon you, but you wore them like your own, if only to walk with your head up when the higher-ups told you to die.

“They wanted to see the world.”

It was you.

“I told them it was a shitty dream, but I guess all human dreams are so small,” and the illusion is gone when your face - Sukuna’s face, now - breaks into a cruel smirk. “Small dream and they never even got to see it happen. Because you killed them. And you couldn’t even kill me, so I guess that’s another body to add to your sins. You think they’d curse you?”

Gojo’s eye blurs, unsure whether it’s the smoke or the exhaustion. He can’t feel his wounds mending - was Sukuna preventing it? When his vision clears, he’s met by (e/c) eyes, too mocking and too arrogant to be yours. Sukuna rounds him, and with a mere push of a finger to his back, Gojo tips over.

“Anyways, I’ve decided. I’ll do it. I’ll go see the world for them.” Gojo’s breathing stops for a good second when Sukuna sits on him - was it just a second though? He can’t tell if the curse meant to sit on his fractured bones, but Sukuna doesn’t look like he noticed nor cared. Sukuna laughs, and Gojo tells himself he’s imagining it when he hears you. He prays that he’s imagining it. “And then I’ll burn everything to the ground with these very hands. Ah, I guess I should say my own hands, now.”

Sukuna stands and the sudden rush of air that enters Gojo’s lungs leave him gasping.

“Too bad the other brats aren’t here, but whatever. I can deal with them later,” He lets out a soft laugh before he puts his hands together. “For now, I’ll start with you and this place. I’m sure (Y/N) would thank me.”

Sukuna grins when Gojo crosses his fingers at the same time.

“Try not to die, alright?”

Gojo wouldn’t have blamed you if you really did curse him.

…

Sukuna stops at the outskirts of Jujutsu Tech, or what remained of it. He closes his eyes, listening to the living world around him, basking in being fully incarnated.

It took a while, but here he was. Finally.

He can hear the fire from the school, slightly muffled in the open area. There’s the rustling leaves of the surrounding trees. Cicadas. Light and even breathing. Traffic from the city proper. Crowds of people waiting to be slaughtered.

He stops, eyes opening and brows creasing.

“Damn brat. That’s a dick move, cursing me over the fuckers who killed you,” he scoffs.

No one else would’ve noticed, but had you heard him, you would have noted there was something missing in the usual edge of his voice.

Liar, you'd laugh. And he wouldn’t have anything to counter you with.

But you’re not here anymore.

＝＝✿＝＝｜✧••❀••✧｜＝＝✿＝＝

It was odd.

The house wasn’t anything to brag about. It blended in with the surrounding neighborhood just fine, yes. With only a single floor, almost paper-thin walls, and a roof that looked like it was ready to crumble into itself at any given moment, it was home. But for their kind, it looked about as comfortable as a shade under a tree or a cave.

What Uraume couldn’t understand was why their master had decided to meet up at such a place.

Ryomen Sukuna was known for his grandeur. He had an insatiable hunger for things that befitted his title as a king. So the thought that he would willingly place himself in a place crawling with lowly humans was almost unthinkable. For a second, Uraume wondered if it was a mistake that Sukuna had incarnated.

Especially when the home apparently belonged to the (L/N) family. Uraume supposed it provided a good cover, in a sense. No one would think to look for him in his old vessel’s home.

“Master Sukuna?” Uraume carefully slid the door open. Sure, the house didn’t seem worthy of respect, but the fact remained Sukuna used it to hide himself away.

It was obvious the home was abandoned. What furniture that remained were covered haphazardly with cloth, a rushed job by someone in a hurry to leave. The hallway leading in had boxes piled up high. One large box left open contained numerous books and magazines, waiting for owners never to return.

From what Uraume could see, there were only two things left in the house that weren’t hidden away. One was a framed photo, hanging on the hallway wall, of an old man and a child with (h/c) locks and a carefree grin. The other was apparently a piano, thought Uraume, as they rounded the corner to find their master, lost in thought and fingers softly dancing over keys.  

Sukuna wondered what you would have said, watching him play an aimless tune.

“Oh, you remember the notes when I play?” you grin at him cheekily. “That’s pretty impressive, Sukuna. Maybe when you quit being a warlord, you can try being a musician.”

The piano is folded into itself, crashing into the nearest wall in the next second. The sound of strings being unceremoniously slammed into each other echoes in the small room.

Sukuna’s not sure if it was your voice ringing in his ears or the piano, but both were equally horrible.

Uraume weighs whether to announce their arrival now or later - especially with an obviously angered master. But before they could decide, Sukuna turns to them by the living room entrance, (e/c) and red eyes gleaming.

“Master Sukuna,” Uraume kneels immediately, face impassive. “I apologize for arriving late.”

“Took you long enough,” Sukuna clicks his tongue, and his eyes find their way back to the wrecked piano. Uraume supposed they got to live another day. “We’re leaving. No doubt someone heard that, and I’m in no mood to deal with them.”

When Sukuna passes by Uraume, he glances back at the room before turning away. Uraume’s not sure if they heard right when their master mutters something about “a shitty curse” and “muscle memory”.

But it was impossible for them to miss how Sukuna raises a fist to the framed photo. He hesitates. And then he flips it over.

The house is abandoned once more.  

＝＝✿＝＝｜✧••❀••✧｜＝＝✿＝＝

What are you doing here, Sukuna?

Sukuna stands at a flower field. Tulips, at least, that’s what he remembers you called them. He never understood why you bothered telling him about flowers whenever you came across one. His face scrunches in disgust, both at the memory and the place. And you, most of all.

“Well, brat, here it is,” he grandly throws his arms open.

But not before long, he heaves a sigh and his arms drop to his side. It wasn’t as fun as he thought it was, especially without a familiar annoying voice chiding about his pompous attitude. It was quiet, accentuated by the peace around the flower field. Sukuna sighs, exasperated.  

“Is this the world you wanted to see?” His voice comes out like a grumble. There was no one to hear it anyway. “I don’t get it.”

He finds himself staring at the vast field, seeming to stretch into the horizon. He smirks. It just meant more land to conquer. And more land to conquer meant more of humanity to eradicate. This era really was a wonderful one to be incarnated into.

And he had you to thank for that.

Sukuna turns around.

Weren’t you going to burn it to the ground?

He glances back at the field of flowers dancing serenely in the breeze. Sukuna feels the lick of his cursed energy on his fingertips before he wills it away. He turns back around.

“Just a waste of energy,” he answers himself, and he walks away.

What was he doing there? He wanted to see what was so special about it. But just as he thought, your dream was a small one. And it was done and over with before he knew it.

His curse doesn’t go away.

＝＝✿＝＝｜✧••❀••✧｜＝＝✿＝＝

This time around, Uraume musters the courage to ask. They spend half the silence contemplating how to word their thoughts carefully, the other half wondering if they should disturb their master when he seemed to be so deep in thought. They’re reminded of a piano in an abandoned home.

“Master,” Uraume doesn’t flinch when (e/c) and red eyes give them a mere glance before returning to the open pages of a manga. Sukuna grunts to say he was listening. “May I ask what you’re doing?”

There’s a pause, and Uraume thinks they’re not getting an answer. Or they were about to be sliced into pieces.

“Just something that caught my interest,” Sukuna lazily flips to the next page, eyes skimming over the black and white panels. “Never you mind.”

“Of course, Master,” Uraume doesn’t pry further.

Sukuna had not seen the world in over a thousand years. Maybe such things would have been trivial to any other being, but Uraume understands that to an extent, some things can still hold the interest of a being as great as their master. They bow low before exiting the room.

Uraume has not been gone long when the silence is broken. But they wouldn't have been aware anyway if they stayed.

“...You don’t have to if you don’t want to…”

Sukuna hears your voice, but a mouth doesn’t form on his cheek as he did to you. After all, you weren’t a curse like him, although he believed you were as horrible as one, and it had been long since you could take control of your body. He wonders if you even remember that the body was once yours.

“And you don’t have to tell me what’s obvious, brat, so shut up,” Sukuna flips to the next page. He hears a small whine and flips back with a roll of his eyes. “This is the only way for you to read it, too, isn’t it?”

There’s a soft laugh, and for a second, Sukuna thinks he sees you at the corner of his eye. But he knows that’s impossible, so he doesn’t turn to make sure.

“Right,” a yawn. He flips the page again to test the waters and you don’t complain. “Thanks, Sukuna…”

“Just shut up and read,” but he smirks at your words.  

Sukuna doesn’t even finish talking when he hears even breathing again. He tosses the manga away, dusting his fingers free from human filth. And he exits the book store painted red with the blood of its patrons.

You really were so troublesome, in death and beyond.

He tells himself that he needed this to keep you happy and quiet. He tells himself he needed to do this to have control of your body without any complaints from you.

But he knew he didn’t have to go through the effort of keeping you subdued. He had prepared countermeasures in case you had proved too difficult once he took over, but for once, he’s actually thankful for those Jujutsu Sorcerers. The sleeping pill meant to kill him worked to his advantage, far too well for the wrong reasons, and you and your soul now woke up only whenever he ordered you to.

He didn’t have to, but if he had already gone through the effort of finding out what you liked, then he might as well use it. He wakes you whenever he’s bored. He wakes you whenever he has something he knows you’ll give him a reaction he’ll be satisfied with.

He didn’t have to have you. He knew that even as he clung to your soul when he finally used your pact.

But this was his thank you.

Yes, you should be grateful. Even if you don’t remember why.

＝＝✿＝＝｜✧••❀••✧｜＝＝✿＝＝

❀BONUS❀

When Sukuna sleeps, he doesn’t dream.

Instead, his soul seems to drift off some place close yet so far away. It’s uncharacteristic for someone of his stature. Something Sukuna wouldn’t have let happen if he could help it.

And yet here he was.

He stood at the foot of a hill of buffalo skulls. Some place familiar, but some place not his own.

The lake of blood he always knew is simply a river of clear water, lit by the early signs of a dawning sky. Sky? Sukuna didn’t remember there being a sky before. He remembered there being an animal’s carcass overhead. But now there was the fog of early morning and a sky hidden behind the foliage of towering trees.

The buffalo skulls at his feet are overgrown by greenery, different flowers blooming at their eye sockets. He notices they’re mostly tulips.

He slowly climbs the hill, taking the time not to crush a single blossom. It didn’t feel right crushing them, no matter how much he wanted to. He was used to taking things that he wanted and destroying those he didn’t.

Sparing some flowers came with the package he took this time around.

When he reaches the top, he takes note that the greenery has swallowed even the space meant to be a makeshift throne. It certainly looked more comfortable than before, which may have been why Sukuna found himself frowning at a sleeping figure.

“Well, aren’t you making yourself at home,” he says that, but now that Sukuna thought about it, this really was your home now.

Some place familiar. Some place not his.

He nudges at your side with a foot rather too roughly. “Move over.”

You open your eyes blearily, and when they land on him, you slowly sit up to make room. The throne, if you could even call it that anymore, had grown in size to accommodate your demands. You don’t comment on how close he is, already falling back to sleep.

Sukuna notices the scars littering your skin, barely visible in the soft light. They weren’t there the last time he came here, but now that he thought about it, the hill in which you sleep on was new, too. The scars are much like the markings around his body, and he feels something akin to pride bubble in his chest. The last he remembered seeing them like that was just before those sorcerers made you wear the talismans.

“I thought I told you not to ignore me, brat. I made time to visit you and this is how you repay me?” Sukuna elbows you, but you merely let out a grumble and open half-lidded eyes.

You whisper something to him, in that same annoying voice he’d known for years. He doesn’t understand your words, and the warmth he feels is unfamiliar, but he doesn’t mind. Your words have an effect on him, just not in the way you expect. Were you even aware of what you said? It doesn’t matter. Your words are truth in this innermost place.

His eyes threaten to close and send him back, so he goes to wake you up again.

Sukuna did go through the trouble, after all, even when you were far too troublesome.