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Rui’s been doing this thing, lately. And Tsukasa isn’t really sure why.
They’ve been dating for a while now, about a couple weeks, and everything’s going fine. Better than fine, actually. Tsukasa’s incredibly happy, and so is Rui, as he tells him every day. Rui’s extremely open with his affections, more than Tsukasa ever thought he’d be. Every moment they spend together, Rui is finding some kind of excuse to compliment him or initiate physical contact, be it hugging him from behind or leaning against his shoulder, or even just an arm around his waist. It’s embarrassing, at times, especially at school, where Rui just loves to make him flustered publicly. He calls him pet names to make him blush, and is never not telling Tsukasa how much he loves him. But there’s one thing that Tsukasa’s realised, and it’s happened every single time. Whenever he tries to initiate a kiss, Rui backs away.
It’s not something that he’d ever thought would even be an issue, if he’s being honest. Rui’s so liberal with his other ways of showing his love, so he just sort of assumed that this would be okay too. But whenever he leans in, or tries to imply you know, go ahead , Rui always finds some way to distract from it or pass it off.
Tsukasa knows it’s not personal. It can’t be. He knows that Rui loves him, it’s not anything like that. But if there’s a problem, he wants Rui to be able to bring it up himself instead of doing… that . Whatever it is he’s doing.
So he does the next best thing he can think of, and he goes to Nene.
“Why are you coming to me with your gay crap?” she groans, looking up at him with disgust and disdain.
“B-Because I don’t know who else to ask!!” he stutters. “You’re close to Rui, right? You’ve known him forever!”
“Doesn’t mean I wanna know the details of his love life.” she deadpans. “Can I go back to eating my lunch?”
Tsukasa sighs. “...Fine, just-- can you hear me out?”
“...Yeah, I guess.” Nene pats the bench beside her. “Take a seat, if you’re gonna be here a while.”
He does, and he lets Nene start on some of her bento before he starts to explain. “So… I think Rui doesn’t want to kiss me.”
“...That’s weird.” Nene comments, taking a bite of her sandwich. “And you don’t know why?”
“Not at all.” Tsukasa leans back on his hands, as if looking to the sky for help. “It’s so strange, because he’s so open about literally everything else, but… he won’t even tell me that there’s a problem. He just acts like nothing happened.”
“Right…” Nene thinks for a moment. “I mean, you’re the first guy he’s ever dated. At least that I know of. Is it something to do with that?”
“Maybe…” Tsukasa blinks, then sits upright, slamming his hands on the bench. “Oh my god, Nene, that’s probably it!”
Nene flinches from the sudden noise. “God, calm down? But, you think that’s the reason? It’s kinda…”
“No, that’s definitely it. It’s actually pretty obvious, in hindsight.” Tsukasa declares. “Thank you, Nene!! I’m going to find Rui!”
“O-Okay…” Nene cringes. “Stop being so loud, jesus…”
“FAREWELL!”
--
It’s not until after school that he manages to find Rui. Or rather Rui finds him, right by the shoe lockers as he’s about to leave for the Wonder Stage.
“Tsukasa-kun~” he calls, slinging an arm around Tsukasa’s shoulders and pulling him in for a side hug.
Tsukasa, who was taken completely unaware, fails to stifle his yelp of surprise. “Rui, you scared me…!” he gasps, clutching at his chest.
“Fufu, sorry about that.” Rui giggles, not sounding apologetic in the slightest. “Shall we walk to PhoeniLand together?”
“Yeah, of course...” Tsukasa starts, then he remembers what he wanted to ask Rui. But, taking a look around, the busy shoe lockers wouldn’t be the best place to go do that.
“...Tsukasa-kun?”
“A, aah, nothing, let’s go.”
Except, as they walk there, Rui talks so much about their upcoming show that it proves impossible for Tsukasa to even bring up anything else. He keeps trying to look for a lull in conversation, but whenever he thinks he might be able to say something, Rui goes off on another tangent, and the moment’s gone.
By the time they get to Phoenix Wonderland, he’s nearly got a headache from multitasking. They say hi to Nene, who got there before them, and then they head to the changing rooms to get into their practise outfits. And it’s there, as he pulls on his hoodie after changing out of his uniform, that he finds the opportunity.
“...Hey, Rui.” he starts, hoping he doesn’t sound too confrontational.
Rui looks up from where he’s tying his shoes, and he smiles softly up at him. “Yes, sweetheart?”
Again with the pet names . He wills himself not to let it make him flustered, and he continues. “Something’s been bothering me, and I wanted to ask you about it.”
“...Oh?” Rui frowns. “What’s the matter?”
Tsukasa bites his lip, trying to figure out how to word this. “...Sorry if this is a bit personal, but…
...Rui, you haven’t had your first kiss yet, have you?”
He knows he’s hit the nail on the head when Rui’s eyes go wide, and he lets out a chuckle. “N...now why would that be too personal?” he replies, and his gaze goes back to his shoes as he continues to tie them. “We’re a couple, aren’t we? That kind of thing is natural to talk about.”
“You’re not answering my question, Rui.”
Rui finishes tying his laces and stands up from the bench. “...We should get going, Tsukasa-kun. I think I hear Emu-kun calling for us, so--”
Tsukasa catches his wrist before he can go any further. Rui stops in his tracks, knowing that he can’t get out of it. “Rui, please. You’ve been avoiding it for weeks.” His tone is one of worry. “It’s fine if you haven’t, I just want to know.”
Rui mumbles something that Tsukasa can’t quite make out. “Sorry?” he asks, taking a step forward. “I can’t…”
Then Rui turns, and though he’s staring at his own feet, Tsukasa can see the bright rosy blush across his cheeks. He covers his face with his free hand, not wanting to meet Tsukasa’s eye. “...I haven’t…” he says, in the quietest voice possible.
I knew it. “And you’ve not been avoiding me because you don’t want to kiss me?”
“....No…” Rui mumbles, and he looks like he’s about to melt into the floor. “I… do want to…” he whispers.
It’s like an arrow right through Tsukasa’s heart. “You…” he starts. “I can’t believe you have the nerve to be embarrassed about this when you flirt with me constantly .” And you get to be cute at the same time?!
“I-I can’t help it!” Rui stutters, and wow , he’s never seen Rui do that before. “I don’t have the first idea about how to k-kiss someone, and you’re… just… I don’t want to make our first kiss a bad one?”
“Rui…”
He lifts one hand and brushes it against Rui’s cheek, smiling when Rui jumps in surprise. He cups his face, and loosens his grip on Rui’s wrist until their fingers are intertwined with each other. Finally, Rui meets his gaze, and Tsukasa brings him closer until their noses are nearly touching.
“Can I kiss you?”
He’s never seen Rui so red before in his life. He can feel the heat from his face through his palm, and he chuckles. Rui can’t bring himself to say any more, giving Tsukasa a silent nod. It’s all Tsukasa needs to lean in, to close the gap--
“W-Wait, hold on,” Rui stammers, taking a step back. “I’m… my heart’s not ready yet, can you wait a--?”
Tsukasa cuts him off, pressing his lips to Rui’s, effectively putting any words Rui might have wanted to say right out of his mind. He hears Rui inhale sharply, and he squeezes Tsukasa’s hand for some kind of support. Tsukasa pulls him in closer, kissing him softly, then breaking apart to leave a few millimetres of air between them. He wants to see how Rui will react, if he’ll continue the kiss or not. For a moment, Rui hovers there, his gaze uncertain. Then tentatively, like testing the waters of a beach, he leans in closer, and Tsukasa smiles against him when their lips meet.
When they eventually pull apart, Rui’s cheeks are even redder than before. Tsukasa can’t help but laugh softly, tucking his long hair behind his ear. “Was that okay…?” he asks, already knowing the answer.
“You…” Rui begins, then he lets out a groan, and he buries his face in Tsukasa’s shoulder. “You’re unfair, Tsukasa-kun.” comes his muffled whine, and Tsukasa raises his eyebrows.
“Oh, I’m unfair, am I? Coming from the guy who called me ‘darling’ yesterday.”
Rui laughs at that, wrapping his arms around Tsukasa’s back. “You may have a point there.”
“Rui-kuuun!” calls Emu’s voice from outside. “Tsukasa-kuuun! Are you doneeee?”
“We should probably go.” says Tsukasa.
Rui lets him go, though makes sure to take hold of his hand. “Let’s not keep our cast waiting, hm?”
“No, let’s not.” Tsukasa smiles.
As they go to leave, he hears Rui chuckle to himself quietly.
“...What’s so funny?”
“Oh, it’s nothing… You’re just cute when you blush.”
Mortified, he brings a hand to his cheek. “I-I’m blushing!?”
“Have been the entire time.”
Tsukasa groans. “Oh, come on …”
“Fufufu.”