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Tony’s never really thought much of the fact that you can’t lie to your soulmate. He’s always thought it was more of a social construct than any actual rule. Howard had lied to Maria all the fucking time, after all. And you hear stories, every now and again, of someone cheating on their soulmate or hurting them, and that’s a deception. So the not-lying thing is definitely more of a behavior than something forced upon you by the soulmate bond.
He keeps thinking that right up until Steve Goddamn Rogers gets in his face after a mission one day and practically screams “Are you trying to make my life difficult?”
Yes, Steve, I wake up every morning just imagining the best way to fuck with you.
That’s what he means to say, at least, but he can’t get the words out of his mouth.
It feels like hours, but it’s probably only a minute that he stands there, staring at Steve across the conference room table. The others are watching them, he can see the mix of exasperation and amusement coloring their faces. The kids always hate it when mom and dad fight.
He wants to laugh.
It’s the word ‘yes’ that trips him up. He shapes the word ‘Steve’ in his mouth and it doesn’t fight him, but the ‘yes’ is heavy and awkward on his tongue.
"Steve," he says. The whole team is looking at him now and he isn’t sure if he’s going to laugh, or cry, or end up screaming in Steve’s face. "Steve, I can’t lie to you."
"You shouldn’t be lying to your teammates anyway, Tony, I-" Steve stopped as he took in the look on Tony’s face, the way their teammates were staring. "You - wait you-"
"I don’t try to make your life difficult." Tony drags in a deep breath, and holy god the truth feels like the most blessed kind of relief, it’s as if there was something hot and heavy pressing down on his shoulders and the truth is shoving it away. “I actually try very hard not to be a burden to you because I’m already convinced you don’t need me and I don’t want to give you an excuse-“
Steve is across the room so fast that Tony doesn’t even register him moving until Steve slaps a hand across his mouth. “Everyone, please leave.” His eyes are wide and dark as he stares at Tony. “We need the room.”
Tony doesn’t look as the Avengers vacate the room in a rush, chairs scraping against the floor, the low murmur of voices as soon as they hit the hallway. His heart is pounding in his chest and he can feel his breath, warm against Steve’s palm.
When they’re alone, Steve lets go. And Tony drags in a breath of cool air, already missing his touch. He hadn’t expected this, he hadn’t ever expected this. Loving Steve was easy and perfect, but soulmates - no. No, he wasn’t the sort of man who got a soulmate. He certainly wasn’t the sort of man who could be Steve Rogers’ soulmate.
Steve touches his cheek, just a soft brush of fingers over Tony’s skin. “How long?” he asks quietly, his voice little more than a hushed whisper.
"I don’t know." Tony feels shaky, lightheaded. "I fell in love with you almost ten years ago. But I think the soulmate thing is new. I don’t actually lie to you that often but…" The Civil War, the Incursions, a thousand little white lies and sarcastic comments. "It’s pretty new."
"Ten-" Steve swallows. "Ten years, Tony. God.” He closes his eyes and his fingers are shaking a little against Tony’s cheek. “Tony.” He leans in close, until their mouths are just the barest distance apart. “Tony, I could never lie to you.”