Chapter Text
February 2, 2022. 12:12 AM.
Hanbin can’t even recall when his passion for dance began. He only knows how alive it makes him feel, how the world suddenly makes sense when his feet are sliding across the floor of the practice room, a space that has become almost like his second home by now. Heck, he even spends more time there than at his own house.
Knock, knock, knock.
The unexpected noise makes him stop dead in his tracks. His vision of the room becomes clearer and objects around him start to take shape. And reality is no longer just the reflection of a 21-year-old boy on the mirror in front of him, but the walls that surround him, the ground where he stands…
“You’re still here, Bin?” … and the familiar face awaiting by the door.
When Hanbin finally turns around to face the other person in the room, a smile appears on the face of the brunet boy who just interrupted him. He blinks away the remaining confusion, slowly adjusting to the dim light of the room.
“Why is it so dark?” he mumbled, more a thought to himself than an answer to his companion. The other boy giggled at this, allowing himself to lean against the door frame.
“It’s past midnight,” said the guy, pointing to the clock just above the mirror he was facing mere seconds ago. “And the director just told me to come ‘get your ass out the academy’s building’,” he shrugged and put his hand up innocently. “Don’t shoot the messenger.”
With a sigh, Hanbin dragged his feet across the floor, trying to reach the duffel bag where he stored his belongings. He still felt in a daze, too tired after hours of practice. But it was always like this for him, so he was used to it by now. Every time he started dancing, he was swayed by the music, losing himself to the beat and the movements. It almost seemed like he was in some sort of trance.
When he was finally close enough, he flopped onto the ground, sitting cross-legged next to the bag. Not too long after, the other boy did the same by his side. Suddenly, he felt something cold against his neck. Startled, he turned to look at the boy, who extended his arm to offer him a bottle of water. Without thinking about it, he took him up on the silent offer and practically chugged the entire thing.
“Slow down, cowboy,” laughed his companion.
“Thanks, Matthew. You’re a lifesaver,” joked Hanbin, at last feeling more like himself again. He was received by an aw shucks from his friend, who was already searching for something inside Hanbin’s bag.
The scene reminded him of the old days, when Matthew and he himself used to be trainees at the same company. They had spent so much time together that asking for permission in order to go through each other’s things became optional. He didn’t really mind it, though. Both of them had witnessed the other’s most shameful moments, so there was nothing inside that bag that could potentially embarrass him.
“Here you go,” said Matthew, interrupting his train of thought. A towel landed on Hanbin’s head, blinding him for a moment before he picked it up and glared accusingly at his friend. “Don’t look at me like that, I was just trying to help!”
“You’re lucky I’m too tired to function right now,” Hanbin replied. Matthew threw him another one of his signature smiles. No one could get mad at that face. Or maybe Hanbin just had a soft spot for him.
With yet another tired sigh, Hanbin laid his back on the floor, indulging in the coldness of it. Matthew followed the gesture seconds after. They stayed like that for a moment, resting. Usually, the academy was a flurry of motion and noise, but not now. Hanbin had always enjoyed practicing late at night for this reason exactly, when there was no one else but him. It was such a typical occurrence that the director even made a copy of the keys for him, which is why it seemed strange to him that she was still around. Maybe she was just making sure that he wouldn’t sleep through his class tomorrow by staying late there.
The boy by his side slightly readjusted his position on the floor. Hanbin didn’t particularly mind the silence, is not like it was an awkward one. But Matthew was not one to stay this quiet if there wasn’t something bothering him. Slowly, Hanbin laid on his side, resting his head on his hand. And when he was finally able to take a good look at his friend’s face, he knew he had just hit bullseye.
“Got something on your mind?” he asked, catching the attention of his companion. Matthew simply exhaled; eyes fixed on the ceiling. “Let me guess, a matter of the heart perhaps?” teased Hanbin, earning a shake of the head and a small laugh from the younger one.
“Are you worried about having competition?” joked Matthew. Hanbin simply rolled his eyes, lightly punching his shoulder with his free hand. “Is nothing, hyung,” he continued. “Just a good old overthinking.”
“You know you can tell me anything, right?” assured Hanbin. “Or, well, we can just stay here all night and let the director kick our asses. That too.”
Matthew smiled despite himself. It was nothing, really. He tended to overcomplicate stuff by picturing every single thing that could possibly go wrong. And he knew Hanbin would help him see things clearer if he just explained, but it didn’t seem fair to always ask for his help. That’s why he tried not to show that he was not feeling his best. Nevertheless, he could sense the gaze of his old friend, insistent. He was no actor, and now there was simply no way for him to get out of this situation without telling the truth.
“It’s just…” he started, pausing a couple of seconds to gather his thoughts. “I’m worried.”
“About what?”
“Not being enough, I guess?”
“What kind of bullshit is that?”
The response took him by surprise, making him cackle out loud. Matthew was no stranger to Hanbin’s bluntness, but it always appeared at the most random of times.
“Was that you trying to comfort me?”
“That was me calling you out on your nonsense,” he replied, eyes still locked onto Matthew’s. “Now quit stalling and tell me what’s wrong.”
Defeated, Matthew pursed his lips and got up, crossing his legs. He reached into one of his front pockets, searching for something. When he finally found what he was looking for, he extended his hand towards his friend. Still confused, Hanbin took what it seemed to be some kind of crumpled piece of paper.
“Trash? I’m Hanbin, not a garbage bin.”
“Just open it.”
Carefully, Hanbin did what he was told, trying not to damage it more than it already was. He was met with some kind of flyer about a competition called ‘Boys Planet’. After skimming through it, he started to make sense of the mood of his friend. It was about a new survival show in the making, produced by one of the most important TV stations nowadays, Mnet.
“Everyone in my company is talking about it,” said Matthew, timidly. He buried his head in his knees before continuing. “Even the higher ups are telling us trainees to audition.”
Hanbin racked his brain, trying his hardest to come up with the correct answer to this situation. While survival shows were probably one of the fastest ways to debut, he understood why his friend was worried about it. It was hardly ideal, to be honest. Not only they were mentally and physically exhausting, but your reputation lied entirely on the hands of the producers. They could make or break your career in just a couple of months. Not to mention that, if your own company was pushing you to give them a go, that usually meant they were not planning to debut any group in the foreseeable future.
“Is that why you asked me if you could come practice here today instead of your company?”
Matthew nodded, still not raising his head. Hanbin let out a questioning mmh, still thinking about the best way to deal with all this. After a while, he clapped his hands together, startling the youngest.
“Then what about giving it a shot?”
Almost instantly, he was able to hear a muffled, frustrated sound coming from the boy by his side. Obviously, that was not what he wanted to hear.
“What are you, my CEO?”
“I know, I know, it sucks,” he conceded. “But hear me out, would you?”
Painfully slow, Matthew finally raised his head, throwing Hanbin a judgmental look. However, he did not say more, letting him speak.
“What do you have to lose? Well, except your mi-”
“Can you get to the point?”
“Rude!” exclaimed Hanbin, but his friend was not in the mood for jokes. “What I wanted to say is, think about it like this,” he continued. “If you win, you get to debut. If not, then worst case scenario is you going back to your company.”
Matthew blinked twice, unamused.
“… Not what you wanted to hear either?”
He sighed, flopping onto his back again.
“It’s easy for you to say, Mr. Perfect. You were always the favorite one, even when we were in Cube. But I’m nowhere near as great or talented as you are.”
“Oh, now you’ve done it.”
Without any prior warning, Hanbin jumped onto Matthew and started tickling him. The youngest tried to stop the sudden attack to the best of his abilities, grabbing his friend’s wrists and begging for mercy. They continued like that for a while, until both of them were out of breath. A shared look was enough for them to start laughing uncontrollably. When they both calmed down, Hanbin rolled to his side, laying down next to Matthew yet again.
“You are talented, Matt. And hardworking. And overall awesome,” said Hanbin, turning his head to look at him. “You might not think so, but I do. Wish you could see yourself through my eyes.”
Matthew stuttered, heart skipping a beat. Not that he would admit that, though.
“What the hell, man. Don’t say that so forwardly.”
“But is the truth. What do you want me to say?”
“Yeah, yeah. Then tell that to the judges, will you?”
A beat. An idea popped into Matthew’s mind. He got up in the blink of an eye, making the floor squeak underneath his shoes.
“That’s it!” he exclaimed, jumping on his tippy toes.
“What is?”
“Audition with me, hyung! We could debut together, just as we dreamed before!” he turned, looking down at him. “It’s perfect!”
“Matt, I’m a dance teacher now, remember? I can’t just up and leave, it’s barely been a year since I got offered the position.”
“B-but! Is just 3 or 4 months max! You could always come back after!”
“Or 3 years if I somehow managed to debut, have you forgotten? There’s no way they would hire me back after that.”
He could see his friend’s face fall, eyes no longer glistening. It was heartbreaking, but he was trying to be realistic. Sure, he wanted to debut, but his current job was stable and well-paid. He might have not been an idol, but being able to dance was enough for him. Or that’s what he always told himself.
“I see…” mumbled Matthew.
“That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try yourself, though. I’m sure you’ll get in easily.”
“Yes, yes. You’re right,” he replied, but he didn’t seem satisfied.
Well, that was a disaster. Placing each of his hands at either side of him, Hanbin propped himself up. He didn’t know how to salvage the situation, so he decided to change strategies.
“Enough of that for today. Let’s get going, I’ll buy you ice-cream,” he said, grabbing his bag and slinging it over his right shoulder.
“We’re in the middle of winter.”
“Has that stopped us before?”
Hanbin put both of his thumbs up, raising his eyebrows. The exchange seemed to bring his friend’s mood up, if at least a bit.
“You’re one of a kind,” said Matthew, shaking his head.
“Is that a yes?”
“Let’s just go.”
The streets of Seoul at night were peaceful, and the stillness in the air was only disturbed by the sound of the wind and the occasional car passing by. Hanbin was grateful for the location of the academy, as food trucks often parked nearby and didn’t close until the early hours of the morning. He and Matthew strolled around, enjoying their ice-creams. When they were finally done eating and chatting, it was almost 3 AM. Tired, they decided to part ways for the day.
“Hanbin.”
The voice of his friend made him turn around one last time. Matthew was smiling at him, rubbing the sleepiness from his eyes.
“Think about it, okay?”
And the way he so earnestly asked made him doubt himself for a second.
“Okay.”
February 2, 2022. 10:15 AM.
“Earth to Hanbin! Are you seriously sleeping standing up?”
A voice right by his ear brought him back to live, blinking confusedly. It was the second time that day he was caught spacing out, too wrapped up in his own world to even notice the space around him. But to be fair, this time it was because he had barely slept at all. He shook his head, praying for the stupor to go away.
The director was looking right at him, brow creased. She had a complicated expression on her face, and the boy didn’t know if he should prepare himself for a scolding or just a little pat on the back. With a sigh, the woman just rolled her eyes and crossed her arms, defeated.
“I keep telling you, you shouldn’t practice the day before a master class.”
“Kinda your fault, Ms. Choi. You could have… What was it? ‘Kicked my ass out’ last night,” he teased, knowing now that he was safe from any type of lecture.
“You keep playing that game and I’ll ‘fire your ass’.”
“Not if I keep bringing in money you won’t.”
She laughed, lightly punching Hanbin on the shoulder. From the outside, they seemed like just two good friends joking around, but in truth she was more like a role model to him. Ms. Choi was the academy director, and Hanbin was grateful for everything she had done for him. There was almost like a sense of indebtment to her, not only for everything that she had taught him in terms of dance, but also for trusting his abilities enough to hire him as a dance teacher. He never wanted to disappoint her, and that was exactly why he spent most nights practicing choreographies for the classes, even if that meant sacrificing sleep. However, Ms. Choi wasn’t a fan of that tactic.
“You sure you can do it? You don’t look so good.”
She inspected him, eyebrow raised.
“You worry too much, Ms. Choi. I’ll be fine, just as always,” concluded Hanbin, seeing some people starting to enter the dance room. It’s not like he hadn’t done this before, and there was still ten minutes left for the coffee he just had to kick in.
“Alright, captain. I trust you,” replied the woman, putting her hands up and slowly walking backwards towards the door. “But let me know if you need a sub, I’m free until 1 PM.”
Hanbin threw a thumbs up her way, watching her disappear after turning the corner. He put his hand to his hips, looking around for a second. He had miscalculated completely the amount of people that would turn in, even when Ms. Choi herself always told him there was a waiting list for his classes. He just never believed her, but that was simply because he didn’t trust his teaching methods enough. Knowing how to dance was one thing, but training people was a completely different matter.
There were a few familiar faces, some from his regular classes and others he remembered from past master classes. He bowed his head to them in greeting before getting ready, crouching in order to reach his duffel bag on the floor. He unzipped it and searched for the basic necessities, such as a towel and a bottle of water. Contrary to popular belief, teachers also get tired and sweaty during class. When he had gathered everything he needed, he raised his head to look at the clock just above the mirror in front of him. However, something else caught his attention. Near the door, a boy about his age was looking straight at him. Their eyes met through the mirror, causing the redheaded stranger to flinch and avert his gaze. How interesting.
“Alright, everyone ready? It’s tutting time!” Hanbin said out loud, clapping his hands and turning towards his students with a smile. Almost everybody cheered, excluding the nervous stranger. “I know some of you are friends, but try to keep a distance so we don’t end up giving a black eye to people around us, will you?” a collective laugh, again, not shared by that same guy. Tough crowd...
… Or maybe not. After a while, the struggles of the boy were made clear. He was actually doing pretty good most of the time, but whenever their eyes met through the mirror, he flunked a move or missed a beat and it always took him at least a couple of minutes to recover. They had gone over the choreography twice and it seemed like almost everyone was catching on already. It wasn’t a particularly difficult one, as it was almost impossible to learn the basics of tutting in only an hour and a half. It was more like an introduction to the dance style in order to get people to sign up for his regular classes. But for some reason, the redhead was still lagging behind. And that was something that, as a teacher, he was not going to allow to happen. No student was left behind on his watch.
“You all are on fire today! I can really see it coming together,” he said after the third run, turning around and pointing to a girl in the first row, who was a regular student of his. “Jiho specially, didn’t know you were interested in something other than hip-hop!”
“I’m a woman of many talents, teach. Just you wait, soon enough I’ll steal your job!” Hanbin laughed at the teasing, letting his eyes wander through the crowd.
“Alright, let’s change it up a bit. I see some of you already got it down and some others are having trouble with certain moves. So, split into groups of 4 and help each other out while practicing together,” before he could even finish, everyone was already milling around and gathering into groups. “I’ll be checking each team from time to time, but don’t hesitate to call me if you need me.”
And just as Hanbin had predicted, there he was, standing alone. Some students tried to approach him, but he just kindly rejected the offer to partner up. When everything was already in motion, he decided to make his way to him, who was already practicing on his own.
“Not a fan of crowds?” Hanbin asked him. The redhead was caught by surprise, almost tripping over his own feet. “I come in peace, no need to be nervous around me.”
Still hesitant, he avoided Hanbin’s gaze like the plague, eyes fixed on the floor.
“Not at all. I’m good. Sorry,” he replied, clearly agitated. Hanbin had to put effort into understanding what he was saying, as he talked very fast and quietly.
“Then why are you apologizing?”
“I’m not? I’m just practicing. You can… you can go check on the others.”
“Well, you’re the one I’m most worried about right now,” replied Hanbin. Almost as if he had been pinched, the boy jumped in place, waving his hands in front of himself.
“I’m telling you, I’m fine!”
“I’ve been keeping an eye on you, so is not like you can really lie to me. You’ve been on edge all class, but I can still see that you’re a pretty good dancer. So, let me help you?”
Silence.
“Or am I the one making you anxious?” joked Hanbin.
He could literally see the face of the boy physically reddening by the second after that comment. Surprised, he gasped, feeling terrible for making the stranger even more nervous.
“Oh, no. No, wait, I’m sorry. I was just kidding. I’m being serious, I’m just here to help. I didn’t mean to scare you out of the class.”
Finally, he raised his head and met Hanbin’s concerned eyes. He was still shaky, but it looked like he desperately wanted to clarify things.
“No, I’m the one who’s sorry! I am nervous. Is my first tutting class, you know?”
“That’s completely fine! You’re doing great. I wasn’t trying to sco-”
“And to be honest, I know who you are,” interrupted the guy. “I’ve seen some of your covers on SNS. I’ve been wanting to sign up for one of your classes for ages, but there’s an awfully long waiting list.”
“Oh, so that’s why you’re so jittery.”
“What I’m trying to say is, it almost feels like I’m meeting a celebrity, you know?”
Hanbin laughed, starting to feel nervous himself. He wasn’t used to this kind of praise.
“I’m far from a celebrity.”
“But you’re a brilliant dancer, though. I kinda look up to you, in a sense.”
Yet another silence. There was no hint of dishonesty or exaggeration in the young man’s voice. This time, it was Hanbin who averted his gaze, taken aback.
“I- That’s-…” he cleared his throat, trying to push the shyness away. “I appreciate the compliment. But just so you know, that’s no gonna make me go easy on you,” he continued, regaining his composure.
The comment drew a smile on the stranger’s face. Hanbin felt like he was finally getting through him, seemingly calmer after some friendly banter.
“Bring it on, then.”
The rest of the class went by smoothly. There was a sense of camaraderie in the air as everyone was helping each other master the moves. Hanbin didn’t need to intervene more than a couple of times, so his focus was almost solely on the redhead. And after a while, it didn’t seem like the latter particularly minded that. Even more so, it felt like he was starting to enjoy himself.
“Teach, think is wrapping time,” said one of the other students, breaking the spell. Hanbin looked at the wall clock, a hint of surprise in his eyes. Already?
“You’re right,” he replied, clapping his hands. People started breaking away from the groups, reaching for their bags. “Good job, everyone! I don’t want to keep you guys, so let’s end it here. Thank you for coming to today’s class and, hopefully, I will see you on the regular starting next week!” he had to project his voice a bit more, as the buzzing began to get louder. “You can sign up at the reception desk. See you around!”
While the room gradually emptied out, he noticed that his “problematic” student was not keen on leaving, standing in the same spot but now with his back to the wall.
“Wanna keep going?” he joked.
“What if I say yes?”
Hanbin tilted his head as curiosity over this stranger started to get a hold of him. He wasn’t expecting the former nervous student to tease him back.
“You’ll have to pay me overtime. Still down?” he continued bantering.
The boy began to search something in his pockets, finally pulling what it seemed like a small piece of paper. After looking at it for a moment, he turned it over, displaying it.
“I have a coupon for two Coke Zero’s for the price of one. That enough?”
Hanbin couldn’t help but laugh, putting his hands on his knees. What a strange guy.
“You’re a funny one, aren’t you?”
“Don’t tell me you don’t like Coke Zero,” he gasped, hand over his mouth in a clearly jesting manner. What a strange, strange guy.
Hanbin exhaled one last laugh and approached him, laying a hand over his shoulder.
“Keep your coupon, I’ll do it for free this time,” he felt the boy tensing for a second, but he relaxed so quickly that Hanbin couldn’t tell if it was just his imagination. “Now tell me, what do you need?”
He put his hand under his chin, pursing his lips in a thinking gesture.
“You know how I’ve been working so hard all class?” Hanbin rolled his eyes at the comment, but did not interrupt him. “I was just thinking that it would be a shame to end today’s session when I’m just a couple of moves away from mastering it.”
“So, you did want me to work overtime.”
The other boy just shrugged innocently as a response. Hanbin sighed, trying to hide the fact that he was quite amused by the situation. He looked at the wall clock, pointedly. It was more an attempt of building anticipation than actually being in a hurry, as he had no classes until the evening.
“Mmh, I think I can spare you a couple of minutes.”
The guy’s eyes seemed to glisten for a second but, as always, it went by too fast to tell.
“Sounds good to me.”
They spent the next ten minutes practicing the choreography slowly and in much more detail. Hanbin made sure to guide his movements every time he seemed to struggle in a particular part, either by holding his hands and putting them into position, or by just placing himself in front of him and asking the redhead to mirror the steps. As Hanbin thought, now that he was calmer around him, he learned fairly quickly and, if he made any kind of mistake, he fixed it promptly and didn’t even need to be told twice.
“That’s it! Now turn. Go faster. Spread your legs a bit more and… pose!”
His student stopped suddenly, striking that final freestyle move. Hands on his hips, chest out. His legs were slightly parted, right one before the left, which made his behind stick out more than usual. He held himself with a confidence Hanbin hadn’t seen on him during the class, even when sweat was running down his cheeks and he couldn’t control his ragged breathing. He couldn’t help but stare, looking at him up and down, sizing up the boy in front of him. However, when he reached his eyes, he noticed he was staring right back.
A beat. A faint smirk.
“Did I do good, teach?”
A deep, shaky breath.
“… Yes, yes you did.”
Hanbin cleared his throat and shook his head in order to get back to his senses. As it was already established, he tended to get lost into anything dance related. That’s why, after seeing him mastering the choreography, he seemed to space out for a second. He was simply amazed by his persistence, of course. No other reason. The other boy relaxed, letting the pose go. Yet, he allowed himself to follow the movements of his teacher just for a few more seconds. He looked almost as nervous as he himself was before the class started. And as much as he liked the feeling of the roles being reversed, he wasn’t particularly found of making people around him uncomfortable.
“Think I’ve taken too much of your time already,” he started, slowly dragging himself towards the corner where his backpack lied. “I’ll be getting out of your hair now.”
Hanbin turned around swiftly, taking some steps towards his direction. He felt like the other may have misunderstood the sudden mood change. It’s not like he wanted him to leave.
“Oh, I still have time!” he replied, standing some paces away. “We can run it from the top some more, if you want,” he continued, pausing for a second after he realized he was sounding kind of needy. Which was absurd, of course. Why would he? Is not like he knew the guy. “I mean, I can’t risk the possibility of a new regular, you know?”
The redhead slung the backpack over his right shoulder. He spun around, a closed eye smile on his face.
“Tempting as that might sound, one has other matters to attend to,” he bowed reverently, one arm in the air and one of his knees slightly bended. “It was a pleasure, Mr. Teach.”
As he headed for the door, something fell out of one of the pockets of his backpack. Hanbin hurriedly picked it up, getting a sense of déjà vu upon recognizing what he was holding. He lightly tapped the other’s shoulder in order to get his attention.
“Here, you dropped this,” he said, handing him the flyer back. “I’ve seen this before. ‘Boys Planet’, right?”
“You know about it?” replied the boy, tilting his head.
“You can say that,” scoffed Hanbin. “A friend was trying to talk me into auditioning together.”
“Well, let me know if he succeeds. Gotta know the competition,” he joked, a mischievous smirk on his face.
“Damn, might as well give up then.”
Both of them laughed, the sound echoing in the room. They looked at each other for a moment longer, feeling like there was something more to say but still not knowing exactly what. Hanbin was the first to break the silence.
“Now that I think about it, I didn’t quite catch your name.”
“You never asked.”
“I’m asking now, am I not?”
“Why?”
“Gotta know the competition.”
The redhead let out a short cackle, breaking eye contact. He nodded a couple of times, acknowledging that Hanbin had bested him using his own words.
“It’s Hao.”
“Hao,” repeated Hanbin, letting his tongue get used to the pronunciation. “Pleasure to meet you, Hao.”
“The pleasure is all mine, master Hanbin,” said Hao, a tint of playful sarcasm in his voice. “See you around?” he asked, and this time it sounded sincere, almost hopeful. Or maybe it was just Hanbin’s wishful thinking.
“See you around,” replied Hanbin, and this time it was almost like a promise.
The clock struck 12:12 PM.