Chapter Text
It was the middle of the night when Shen Yuan could no longer hold back his tears.
It had taken him a long time, about a week, to understand that he had actually died.
At least his original body had died. His soul, or his mind, he wasn't quite sure which, had somehow survived and ended up in the webnovel he had started reading just a few days before.
There had only been twenty chapters out, but Shen Yuan had already read every other book with the tag 'cultivation' and had started it despite the fact that it wasn't finished yet.
Even though the book had some strange tags like 'harem' which Shen Yuan had never heard of, the first few chapters were not that uninteresting.
And yet, without the fascinating protagonist, it would not have been enough to captivate Shen Yuan, who, in his young age, was already a very experienced reader!
Luo Binghe was the friend he had wished for all his life. Unfortunately, Shen Yuan suffered from lung cancer at an early age and therefore could never really go to school because his parents were afraid something might go wrong and they might lose their A-Yuan, so Shen Yuan had never really had any friends except his Meimei.
Luo Binghe was kind, sweet and cared about others, while he also needed someone to care about him, and Shen Yuan was only too willing to become that someone.
It was the night a week after he woke up in the world of the book, and the next day there would be a selection of new disciples and Luo Binghe would finally be admitted to Qing Jing Peak. Shen Yuan couldn't wait!
However, this excitement was the reason why he hardly found any sleep.
And as thoughts tended to do, they wandered in a direction Shen Yuan had not originally intended.
Suddenly, he thought about his last day at home, how his Meimei had returned from school and had done homework with him. How his father had cooked and sang in this horrible voice of his while his mother came back from work and hugged him close.
At first Shen Yuan smiled at the thought. It was a good memory, so much better than all those memories in the hospital where his Meimei usually cried and his mother had always absently stroked his hand.
But then it struck him that he would never have another day like this with his family.
He would never see them again.
Because he was dead.
This reality hit him harder than he ever thought possible, but it was true. He - at least his real body - was dead, and there was nothing that could change that fact.
He squinted as he felt tears welling up in his eyes and wrapped his arms around himself because he was suddenly so incredibly cold. As cold as he had only felt when wearing those thin hospital clothes.
Shen Yuan didn't even want to imagine what happend in the morning after he died.
Every morning his mother woke him up, so she was probably the one who-
And that's when he couldn't hold back the tears anymore. He began to cry. Desperately, he pressed the palms of his hands to his eyes to stop the tears, but it was no use. A few tears always found their way past his palms.
Why was Shen Yuan only thinking about this now? Was he a bad person for thinking about his family only after a week? Did he even deserve all their love and care?
"A-Yuan?" a voice that Shen Yuan immediately recognized suddenly asked. It was a voice that had accompanied him this whole first week here and had rarely left his side.
Shen Jiu, who unlike in the book had a son - Shen Yuan! - was standing only a few meters away from his bed. In the darkness, Shen Yuan could only make out his silhouette.
When Shen Yuan had first woken up here, he had been very confused because Shen Jiu treated him so much nicer than he had treated Luo Binghe in the webnovel. However, it hadn't taken long for Shen Yuan to understand why, as a glowing box had appeared in the air next to him and the so-called 'system' had declared, [ Account activation: Shen Yuan, Shen Jiu's son. The mission: to live the life you never could. ]
Shen Jiu slowly approached him and said in a worried tone of voice, "A-Yuan, what happened?"
~•~
It was already late at night, but as in so many nights, Shen Jiu could not sleep our of fear he would have nightmares of THAT time. Of the Qiu family. Of before Yue Qingyuan had saved him. It had been so long ago now, but Shen Jiu still couldn't get rid of the images in his mind and the pain on his skin. As if the handprints of all the beatings he had endured were burned into his skin where he would have to see them forever.
He had heard a soft noise from the next room in the bamboo house. At first he had thought nothing of it. His little angel Shen Yuan sometimes woke up at night and then got a glass of water and went back to sleep, so it wasn't something he had to worry about. Besides, he was already twelve and could at least take care of himself a little.
However, when he heard a soft sob, Shen Jiu immediately sat bolt upright in bed.
He got up and made his way to his son.
Shen Yuan was lying in his bed. He had his palms pressed to his eyes and was crying.
What could have caused his little angel to cry? A nightmare perhaps?
Shen Jiu had realized early on that he was bad at this whole father thing. He never had a clue what to do when Shen Yuan cried, felt overwhelmed when his son didn't tell him directly that he was feeling bad, and could never tell exactly what was going on in his head. He was a bad father. All he wanted was for his A-Yuan to be well.
Sometimes, however, he felt that he was doing more harm than good.
"I'm sorry, Mama," Shen Yuan sobbed, and Shen Jiu felt himself start to shake.
His poor little A-Yuan!
His mother had been a cultivator of a minor sect and she and Shen Jiu had met during an immortal alliance conference.
They had started a relationship together, but it had not worked out in the end, because Shen Jiu had not been able to understand why some people found women so attractive. She had also told him that she had noticed that his interests were probably in a different area, and then she had winked at him! Whatever she had meant by that, Shen Jiu had decided not to worry too much about it.
But when she died nine months later giving birth to a boy who looked just like Shen Jiu, he had a whole new set of things to worry about.
Fortunately, he had Mu Qingfang to teach him important things like how to change diapers and how to tell if a child was sick and what to do to cure a simple cold with his spiritual energy.
But also Yue Qingyuan, who had the talent to calm Shen Yuan when Shen Jiu was at his wits' end and didn't know what to do.
Maybe he should just leave Shen Yuan alone. It was clear that he didn't want his father right now.
But as Shen Jiu looked at his son, he realized that he just couldn't do it.
When Shen Yuan cried, it caused a feeling in Shen Jiu that he had not thought possible until this moment. Like it would be okay if the whole world burned as long as Shen Yuan stopped crying.
"A-Yuan?"
He saw his son slowly remove his hands from his eyes and look at his father.
"A-Yuan, what happened?"
But he didn't get an answer to that, instead an expression of despair found a way to Shen Yuan's slightly reddish face.
Shen Jiu sat down on the edge of his bed and reached out a hand to gently stroke his hair.
"What's wrong? "he asked softly.
Shen Yuan seemed to think for a long moment before saying, "Nightmare."
"Do you want to talk about it? "Shen Jiu asked gently. Nightmares were another thing that had overwhelmed him at first, but as so often, Yue Qingyuan had helped him and told him how he had helped the other children back then when they had nightmares.
Shen Yuan shook his head. After a while, he asked, "Can you tell me a story?"
Shen Jiu smiled gently. His son loved books and stories more than anything. Especially in the last week, he had shown a great interest in literature. He would make sure that his disciples brought a collection of new books to Qing Jing Peak on the next mission that took them further away.
"Everything for my A-Yuan," he whispered, "Once upon a time, there was a powerful ghost king..."
After about ten minutes, Shen Yuan's breathing had calmed down and his eyes had closed.
Shen Jiu sat beside him for a while and continued to stroke his hair while looking down at him lovingly.
He didn't know what he had done to deserve such a wonderful and sweet angel, but Shen Jiu knew that if anything happened to his A-Yuan or if he got hurt, he would stop at nothing to protect his son.