Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

Tony wakes up because his pillow is wriggling. Since his pillow at the moment is Steve's lap that isn't too alarming, but Steve is also babbling, which is a bit.

"-ust fell asleep," Tony hears once he's awake enough to understand. "I didn't- I'm not-"

"It's okay," Loki says. He sounds like he's rolling his eyes but in a nice way, which makes Tony smile because generally that expression is reserved for Tony. Sometimes Thor gets it, in very private moments when Loki is recounting stories of their shared pasts, but only with Tony, and only very rarely. Tony is glad that Loki has warmed up so much to the other Avengers, Steve, Tony's best friend, most of all.

"Why do you think I would mind?" Loki asks, carefully lifting Tony's feet and sitting down at the other end of the sofa. Tony yawns but refuses to admit that he's awake, keeping his eyes tightly closed.

"I don't…" Steve seems unable to truly explain. Tony has his suspicions, but he isn't officially awake so he doesn't explain about old-fashioned ideas being deeply embedded in Steve's subconscious. Yeah, it used to be a source of jokes and slapstick moments at the beginning, but by this point Steve is pretty much like any other person having grown up at the later half of the century, apart from how completely unashamed he is of his ideals. Most other people who share them are aware of how old-fashioned they are and are generally embarrassed or defensive. Not Steve, though.

"I don't have a claim on Tony," Loki explains patiently. He and Tony had that conversation a couple of times, mostly because of Steve, who had started acting like he'd done something horrible when Tony used him as a pillow. "The only person in all the realms who has any right to give permission on who touches Tony is Tony himself."

"I know that." Steve sounds embarrassed, probably because they've been through that conversation once or twice already. "It's just that I don't want you to get the wrong impression."

Loki huffs. "There is no wrong impression to get. Tony loves you. You're his best friend." Loki clearly is getting a bit exasperated by this point. It's not either of their fault, really; they just come from two such completely different backgrounds. Asgard is very different from Midgard in many ways, some of them big, some of them small, and America's 1940's are even more alien. When Steve was young monogamy was the idealized norm and couples, for all intents and purposes, belonged to each other (the women much more to the men than the other way around, of course). Steve is used to that sort of mindset, even if he's long come to terms with how much more varied things nowadays are. He's never truly judged Tony for his manwhoring ways and hadn't treated Tony any differently when he had seemingly stopped having so much sex (he hadn't known that the only thing to actually stop was the varying sex partners). Thus, it had caught Tony a little off-guard how skittish Steve had suddenly become after Tony's relationship with Loki had become established fact. At first Tony had thought it was the pregnancy (which, honestly, nobody could've blamed him for) but it's clearly Tony and Loki's relationship, and not due to the fact that it's Loki Tony is going steady with.

Shifting uncomfortably, Steve replies, "I know. I love him too. In an entirely platonic way," he hastily adds. It confuses Tony that Steve has no qualms admitting how important Tony is to him, that his only issue is clarifying as to the nature of his regard for Tony. He could never do that, even if he wanted to. Which he generally doesn't.

Loki sighs, probably resigning for now to Steve's quirks. "You're godfather for a reason," he changes topics. "Of all of us, you're probably the only reliable role model out there."

With that, Tony full-heartedly agrees (it's actually almost word for word what Tony said when he discussed this with Loki), with the small disclaimer that Bruce is a clear runner-up for the placement of top role model material among the Avengers. Though Bruce is a little too non-confrontational for Tony's taste – for good reasons, of course, but still. Steve is non-confrontational, but he's a bit less of a push-over.

"That's not true," Steve immediately protests. "Both you and Tony are great role models."

"Tony, yes," Loki agrees immediately, making Tony's belly flip. "Me? Not at all."

"I don't agree," Steve says. "You're not the most conventional person, but that's not a bad thing. And it's patently obvious that you love the child and Tony and would do anything for them, and that's what matters the most. You have problems, yes," he continues when Loki doesn't reply. Tony really wants to know what his face looks like but he doesn't dare move for fear of drawing both their attention away from what they're talking about. "And I can't say I'm a fan of how you handle them. But you're clearly learning to compromise and you regret the worst things you have done." It's not exactly ringing endorsement. Tony could have done better, but then, Tony knows a lot better just how much Loki cares. Seeming to realize this, Steve leans in towards Loki, subconsciously putting a hand on Tony's head. "It's easy to be a good person when you've never been challenged. You have been challenged, and a lot, and continuously, but you're a good person, Loki, and that's commendable, and it's one of the most important things you can pass on to your child."

Loki's body is tense underneath Tony's feet. For a long time, nobody says anything.

"Thank you."

They're quiet after that, the TV quiet background noise, and eventually Tony drifts off to sleep again, the baby's halfhearted kicking notwithstanding.

He's halfway through his eighth month of pregnancy and he's more than ready for it all to be over. He's back to being tired again all the fucking time, partly because he doesn't sleep well because it's next to impossible to find a comfortable position what with the kicking and the backpain, partly because he's lugging around a belly the size of a watermelon. The baby weights about four pounds at the moment, and then there's all the water it's swimming in. There is a part of Tony that just wants for this to be done with, but a different part of him is utterly terrified at the thought of the baby actually coming out now. He isn't ready for that, he just isn't.

It's all him, he knows that. The baby has its own room, fully equipped with everything a baby might need in his first year of life. Everything is prepared for the birth, the doctors, the room, the nurses all on stand-by, having long since signed a non-disclosure agreement.

Not that it's necessary. The press long since know what's going on.

That's not something Tony expected, which is a completely idiotic oversight on his part. It had been completely understandable at the time, or so he's been told; he'd been far too busy with everything that had been going on at the time, but Tony doesn't quite accept that. Seriously, he's had to deal with the press all his life. He shouldn't have been caught that off-guard when he'd first caught a headline speculating about his recent weight gain.

Pepper hadn't been happy about that.

No, that's a lie, Tony hadn't been happy about that. At all. Pepper hadn't much cared; nobody professional paid much attention to the society pages. Mostly because they tended to write something different about Tony every week.

But it had been something of a wake-up call to Tony; opening his eyes to the fact that he'd probably spend the next couple of months foremost behind closed doors and in fenced-in areas, hiding from the paparazzi. And it wouldn't make much of a difference whether they knew of his pregnancy or not; he wasn't going to get any slimmer anytime soon. Quite the opposite, really, guaranteeing him their continuing attention. He didn't have any illusions as to how long he'd be able to keep his pregnancy hidden either; they would find out sooner or later, inevitably. Tony's private secrets have always been weighed against how high a price an anonymous source was offered for them. He barely bothers cutting these anonymous sources off anymore.

So Tony had talked to Loki and his friends, the Avengers plus Pepper and Rhodey, and had had a meeting with his PR manager. The result of all these talks had been controlled releases of bits and pieces here and there to the press, some official, some through "accidental" slips in interviews or "anonymous" sources. This sort of carefully playing and swaying of the public's opinion is something Tony's team has done before; Tony rarely bothers. He generally doesn't care much what they say about him and considers playing with the press a source of entertainment.

That, of course, hadn't been an option here. First of all, Tony's relationship with Loki had already been somewhat questionable; they had taken care of that via the spreading of rumors, a couple of accidental slips as to Loki's past. Loki hadn't liked it much, but it's not like a lot of it isn't available on wikipedia anyway due to Norse mythology. All they really had to do was confirm that some of it was true.

Of course that didn't make everybody suddenly love Loki, but it incurred some understanding for him, and then there'd been this whole romantic spiel the press had come up with about how Tony's love had saved Loki, and how Loki's love had cleaned up Tony's act. Complete nonsense, of course, but it had worked. A very unintended but positive side-effect of this had been that the council of S.H.I.E.L.D. had decided that really, it didn't matter much who Tony slept with as long as Loki made some concessions. Fury had had to give in, and he had done so, if less than gracefully. Tony is fairly sure that Coulson had a lot to do with that, but whenever he asks the agent will just smile blandly and deftly avoid the question.

The news of the pregnancy had caused a media storm of previously unmet proportions. Not even the "I am Iron Man" thing had incurred this big an interest; the press had completely beleaguered the tower and various of Tony's other properties and hadn't stopped yet. It's not really surprising, all things considered, but Tony is not appreciative of the attention nor of the things complete strangers have to say about him and his life. It's gotten to the point where a photo of Tony with his visibly pregnant belly is worth several millions. Tony has taken to not leaving his residences, using Loki's teleporting service for transport. All his windows have been equipped with filters that make the taking of pictures through them impossible – another of Tony's many inventions born of necessity.

This, of course, doesn't make Tony happy. He's been locked up inside for months now and it completely sucks – he's fine with spending days not leaving his workshop, but he's always enjoyed going outside for a dose of adrenaline, using one of his many cars or the suit. Neither is an option right now, not even if it weren't for the extreme attention of the press.

So, yeah. Tony doesn't have much else to do but sleep. Well, that's a lie, there are many things he can do inside, but lately he hasn't much had the energy for any of them.

It's worrying his friends, he knows this; they've started spending more time with him, trying to engage him in activities. Playing xbox and online games mostly, watching TV, even card and board games, and of course science. Usually all things Tony enjoys (the board games more for the opportunity to mock than anything), but at the moment he's just pretty unmotivated in general.

Thus the falling asleep on Steve in the middle of the day. And Loki's hovering.

When Tony wakes up some time later, both of them are still there, Steve still pillowing Tony's head in his lap and Loki Tony's legs. They're both attentively watching a documentary – something about the hunt for Red October – but Tony isn't fooled; they're both hovering. Steve is absently carding his fingers through Tony's hair while Loki is not-so-absently massaging his ever-aching feet. It's sweet of the both of them, but a part of Tony can't help but resent that they're fussing over him. Used to be he was independent and free to do whatever he wanted, but of course that's a lie, really. The time in his life when he'd come as close to being completely independent as he ever would hadn't been a happy one.

"Almost two hours," Loki informs him when Tony stirs, even though Tony is long past the point where he cares how long he naps.

"You okay?" Steve asks worriedly.

Tony grumbles. He has to pee, naturally, and he can't get up, trapped on his back like a turtle, also naturally. When he pulls his legs off Loki's thighs Loki anticipates his needs – not too difficult, Tony has to pee all the time nowadays – and stands, offering Tony his hand to pull him up.

"Later, babe," Tony murmurs, pressing a kiss to Steve's cheek absently, as if he's still asleep. Loki's eyes twinkle when Tony turns around but they keep their faces perfectly blank until they're safe in Tony's room (and after Tony has had his pee break). Then they share a mischievous grin and as one sit at the foot of the bed to watch the footage of the security camera. Knowing them, Jarvis courteously zooms in on Steve's face the moment Tony pulls back. Wide-eyed and with an embarrassed flush coloring his cheeks Steve's eyes dart back and forth between the two of them. Once they're gone he ducks his head and rubs his neck, switching off the TV and heading off towards the training room, shaking his head.

Chuckling, Tony and Loki share another mischievous grin. Their eyes stay locked as the expression fades from their faces when Loki reaches out to cup Tony's face, fingertips sliding over his cheekbones and jaw. "I'm worried about you," Loki confesses quietly. "You've been very lethargic lately."

Tony shrugs. "I know. There doesn't seem to be anything I can do about it."

Leaning in, Loki captures his lips. The kiss is soft at the beginning but develops into something a bit more, ending with a question mark as they separate. Even in bed Tony has been a bit lazy lately, mostly too tired to do anything more demanding than hand jobs. Of course he'll never turn down a blowjob, but fact of the matter is that he himself isn't really capable of anything vaguely acrobatic at this point. The best he can do is lie back and let Loki take the wheel, which isn't a bad thing, but Tony hasn't really been feeling like it much.

Loki reads it on his face, that Tony isn't really up to anything right now. The corners of his mouth quirk up in a resigned smile. It's clearly no reason for him to stop kissing though because he leans in again, peppering Tony's face with small kisses that make both of them laugh because it's so overdone kitschy.

They're eventually interrupted by Jarvis. "Sir, Thor has returned. He has brought Frigga."

If that doesn't kill whatever mood has built up despite Tony's being, well, not in the mood.

"What? " Loki hisses. He sounds angry; he often sounds angry even when he's more shocked or hurt. Tony feels his belly flip because that definitely, definitely hadn't been planned. He actually had thought he would never, ever meet neither Odin nor Frigga because of the whole familial entanglement that's pretty much public knowledge by this point. This had certainly been unexpected, much less unplanned.

And Tony's dressed in a pair of very stretched jogging pants without elastic band (technically they're specially for pregnant women, but they're black and nobody knows so it doesn't count. Okay? Okay. Tony's t-shirt is decidedly not for women, but it's a couple of sizes too big by necessity. As a result the neck is too wide, either almost slipping down over Tony's shoulder or alternately sloping down to the arc reactor. All in all, Tony looks pretty much like a bum, which he isn't too pleased about either. Tony's never been one to overly fuss over his clothes but he can't say it's unimportant to him how he looks. And as they say, you don't know what you have until you're missing it. Tony misses a hell of a lot of things these days, his fine suits definitely among them.

"They are waiting in the living room," Jarvis tells them. He almost sounds apologetic.

"Oh my god," Tony moans. "Tell me this isn't a bad sign."

"She wouldn't," Loki whispers, eyes wide and hectic. "She wouldn't."

That's when Tony realizes that actually he is not the centre of the universe, despite his incredible expansion, and that Loki is freaking out much more than him, for very valid reasons. Frigga is his mother, actual relation not mattering a bit in this case, and she and Loki haven't had a proper conversation since before Loki found out about his true origins. As far as Tony knows Loki had been too wrecked, too hurt and too angry to be available for any sort of constructive talk when Thor had taken him back to Asgard after the whole Chitauri invasion business. Though for Loki it had been more of a "get out of this hell" business than anything else. Not that he had been forced per se to incite an army to completely wreck New York in the process of getting out of there, but it's all relative.

"Of course she wouldn't," Tony says, taking hold of Loki's face and staring him into the eyes. "I don't believe that for a second, not going by what I know of her from you and Thor." And Wikipedia, but Loki wouldn't react well to the reminder that much of his personal life is recorded (and inaccurately at that) on the internet.

"But why is she here?" Loki asks. "I don't understand."

"She'll tell us," Tony replies, leaning their foreheads together so they can just breathe for a moment. He'll not freak out. It doesn't matter how he's dressed; he's pregnant, Midgard doesn't offer proper clothes for a pregnant man and Tony is too stubborn to have them specially made for him (and also too vain, because clothes that actually fit will only end up emphasizing his belly and that – no, thank you). Besides, it's unlikely she's up to date on what is fashionable and what isn't on Midgard. She might not even notice.

Right. She might not notice that Tony looks like a complete bum with his way too loose, soft clothes. Because she's completely oblivious and inattentive and also forgetful. Sure.

But Tony isn't thinking about that, he isn't, because Loki has much more reason to freak out and while the two of them have no problem with freaking out together when it matters one of them will generally keep his head to ground the other. Lately that, admittedly, has mostly been Loki. So now it's Tony's turn, no problem, he can do that. He's an expert at compartmentalization.

Pressing a kiss to Loki's lips, Tony says, "She's probably here to check out the m- other father of her grandchild. It'll be fine. She cared about your other children, didn't she?"

"Not about Hela, Fenrir and Jörmungandr," Loki whispers.

"But she didn't know about them," Tony points out. "You were out of contact with Asgard during your marriage with Angrbodr, you told me." Loki bites his lower lip but not in denial, so Tony adds a bit of speculation, "And she did care about Sleipnir, Váli and Nari, right?"

Taking a deep breath, Loki nods. "She did, yes." He takes another deep breath, closing his eyes and doing whatever he does when he looks like he's counting down from ten in Swahili. Which is not counting down from ten in Swahili, or any other language. Tony knows this because he had asked, and because Loki had looked at him with a condescending, pitying expression like he was marveling at how adorable Tony was when he was being naïve. It's not a look Tony likes to receive, especially not from the guy he's fucking, so he remembers very well.

"Okay?" Tony asks. It earns him a sharp look for the mollycoddling, which tells Tony that Loki's calmed down at least a little. Or alternately that he's freaking out completely, but Tony considers that unlikely.

"Let's go," Loki says firmly and helps Tony up. As they head over into the living room Tony belatedly realizes that he's not even wearing socks, not to mention shoes.

Oh well. He'll meet Loki and Thor's mother, the Queen of Asgard, Frigga the goddess of goddesses and wife of Odin with bare feet. That's great.

Thor and Frigga are sitting together on the sofa, Thor apparently having made them tea by what it looks like. It appears he's also talking about ice cream. "…the process of preparation is very complicated and detailed. I watched-" when they enter the room, stopping mid-sentence when he notices Loki and Tony. "Brother Loki, brother Tony!" he greets them happily, but there's a tightness around his eyes that lets them know that he's aware of the delicacy of the situation. Nevertheless acting as normal, Thor gets up to give both of them big hugs, squeezing Loki tightly and treating Tony like fragile glass as usual since Tony's condition has become visible. He's been gone for about a week, visiting his parents for the first time since he went there to tell them about Tony's pregnancy.

"Thor," Loki returns. Usually it'd be followed by some sort of dryly uttered pleasantry such as a faintly sarcastic, "I hope your stay at Asgard was enjoyable", but he's clearly too nervous even for that right now, eyes immediately focusing on Frigga who has gotten up as well.

"Hello, Loki," she says. Her smile is unrestrained, but Tony thinks it might be a little nervous. And if even he, who has never met her before, notices, it must be patently obvious to her sons.

"Hello mother," Loki replies, voice a little tight. Her smile immediately gets brighter, even turns a little watery, and the next moment the two of them are hugging tightly.

Tony and Thor share a look, both of them cautiously happy for Loki but very aware of the delicateness of the situation. In order to give the two of them some resemblance of privacy (and also because he can't really stay standing for really any vaguely extended period of time nowadays) Tony waddles over to the sofa. Ever solicitous, Thor accompanies him with a hand hovering in the small of Tony's back, offering his hand to help Tony sit down. Tony does not snap at him, he'd like for that incredible show of restraint and goodwill to go on record.

"I am glad you are well," Frigga tells Loki quietly behind them. Tony eyes the two cups of tea that stand on the table, smell wafting through the air, but he's already had a cup of coffee today. He is not going to start misbehaving now, not six weeks before the birth, not after twenty-three weeks of painstakingly consuming only what he's been allowed. Besides, he only wants it for the caffeine; he doesn't even really like tea.

"Would you like for me to get you a cup of hot beverage as well?" Thor offers politely. Tony's used to that by now, people keep offering to do things for him left and right. He used to get pissed about that but eventually he just resigned himself to it, partly because he started to actually need the help and partly because he had to realize that there's no way they will stop. It's deeply ingrained instinctive behavior, Tony has been informed, not much any of them can do about it.

"Hot chocolate, please," Tony sighs. Thor smiles happily at being able to do something for him – that's the weirdest thing about it, how genuinely happy they all are when there is something they can do – and walks off.

Behind Tony, Loki clears his throat. "It is good to see you, mother," he says. "Let me introduce you to Anthony Stark." That's when Tony, very belatedly, realizes that he totally inserted himself into what is essentially a family reunion. He should have let Loki go to meet his mother on his own, give them some privacy. It's too late now, of course, but maybe he can leave after a quick introduction. Technically this is his house, after all, his being here in the first place can be excused as politeness on his part instead of bugging in on what's not really his business.

Tony makes as if to get up, but immediately there's a hand on his shoulder. "Oh no, please, don't get up on my account," Frigga tells him, removing her hand and gifting him with a warm smile. "I remember very well how one feels when this far along. When I was in my eighth month I was very ready for it all to be over for barely being able to move."

"I don't suppose those last couple of weeks went by miraculously fast?" Tony asks hopefully.

She laughs. "Unfortunately, no." Taking a seat next to Tony while Loki sits on Tony's other side, Frigga offers Tony her hand, her warm smile not having waned one iota. "I am very happy to meet you, Mr. Stark. I am Frigga."

Tony puts on the most sincere version of his most charming smile, because he means it. Loki has generally had good things to tell about his mother even though he'd been pissed at her as well. She clearly loves both her children a lot, making no difference between the two like Odin had. Yeah, she's made mistakes, but then, she's had a lot of time to make them – and she will have a lot of time to make up for them. "It's a pleasure, and please, call me Tony."

"Tony," Frigga repeats. "I trust you are in good health." Her gaze doesn't once flicker down to his belly, which Tony appreciates a lot. Sometimes people treat him in such a way that he feels like they see him more as a walking uterus than an actual person.

"As well as I can be," he replies. "We both are."

She smiles. "I must apologize for the uninvited visit, but I could not stay away a moment longer." She looks genuinely regretful. "I felt compelled to meet the man who has made Loki so happy and who is the mother of my twelfth grandchild."

Mother, yeah. Tony manages not to wince at that and just ignores it. However, he isn't at all convinced that he has indeed made Loki happy. It seems that Loki is content here – finally, after weeks of getting used to it on both sides – but that's not all there is to happiness. Tony is fairly sure that, if he'd had any choice about it, Loki would never have picked Tony to carry his child, or even to just be the other parent. But that's not what he primarily thinks about upon Frigga's words; most of him is busy analyzing them and thinking about how she makes it sound as if she had been waiting for an invitation and wondering how much of a faux-pas it was not to invite her.

Next to him, Loki has clearly drawn the same conclusion because he stirs and leans into Tony's space, towards her. "Were you waiting to be invited?" he asks in surprise, eyes narrowing. Tony gets the feeling that they've catapulted straight from the reverent Prince meeting the Queen to the abandoned son being surprised at the depth of his mother's regard. That, he's sure, isn't something many people are allowed to witness. He'd love to get up and slink away, but nowadays getting up is a very difficult and time-consuming task and slinking is entirely impossible. Tony hasn't been able to be inconspicuous since roughly four months ago. Or really since his pregnancy had become known to him and the Avengers, now that he thinks about it.

"Of course," Frigga says, expression soft as she reaches across Tony to cup Loki's face. This is getting extremely awkward but Tony keeps perfectly still. He can only imagine what this means to Loki; all he's sure of is that it's a lot, and that possibly something that has been hurting him for years is brought on the path towards healing now. Tony never got to make up with his parents so he's happy for Loki, but he can't prevent himself from being a little bitter.

Consequently, he feels conflicted when Thor comes back, interrupting the moment. He's carrying two cups, one of tea for Loki and one with hot chocolate for Tony. With unusual quietness, he wordlessly sets the cups down in front of them on the table and takes a seat on the sofa in a right angle to the one Loki, Tony and Frigga are sitting on. When he finds all three of them looking at him he pulls up his shoulders and says carefully, "I am glad." Nothing else, but the three Norse gods (that will never get old, not when Tony thinks about it, and neither will the fact that Tony is pregnant with the child of one of these gods) share a meaningful look that makes Tony feel even more superfluous.

"Maybe I should-" he starts, putting the hands on the sofa in preparation for the complicated process of heaving himself up, but before he can do or say anything more Loki puts a hand on his thigh.

"Don't be ridiculous," he says sharply, and it's funny, really (not), how Loki is the only one who is allowed to call Tony that. At least as far as Loki is concerned. Tony himself is on the fence about the whole thing. On the one hand Loki doesn't do it often, but on the other hand he still does it and Tony doesn't like it. The narrow-eyed glance he aims at Loki says as much, but Tony decides not to further express his discontent with the whole thing right now, in front of Loki's mother.

"How did the two of you meet?" Frigga asks suddenly, interrupting all silent communication. When Tony turns around to look at her there is an amused twinkle in her eyes. Glancing at her other son, she continues, "Thor has been remarkably tight-lipped about that."

"Well…" Tony starts, looking at Loki, but Loki keeps his mouth shut and his face blank, giving him no indication how he wants Tony to tell the story. This annoys Tony and so, turning back to Frigga, he tells the blunt truth. "Loki was in the process of invading my city using my tower, so we met here to discuss the whole thing."

She raises an eyebrow, amusement increasing in her eyes. "Did you now. And how did that… discussion fare?" Oh, she's joking with him. Tony loves a woman who can joke.

Gifting her with a brilliant smile he quips, "There was some flirting and some death threats and at the end of it Loki threw me through the window." He gestures towards the one in question. "That one, in fact. On the whole, it went remarkably well."

Her answering smile is mischievous and they might not be genetically related, but she looks a lot like Loki right now. Or Loki looks a lot like her, that's probably the correct order. "I take it you enjoyed yourself."

"Tremendously." Tony grins.

Smile gentling, Frigga touches his cheekbone the way she had touched Loki's earlier. "Everyone always assumed Loki needs someone scholarly to match his incredible mind, but I have always known that he needs so much more than that." It sounds like she's saying that Tony is that, but Tony has his doubts. Loki has been alive for over a thousand years, he's had his fair share of partners, some he left, some who left him. Tony can't be all that special all things considered.

Her smile fades as she looks him in the eyes. Not taking her fingers off Tony's cheek she looks past him at Loki. Tony takes the opportunity to lower his gaze and take a breath. This has all taken a rather sudden turn for the serious. "You need to take greater care to ensure he knows that, Loki," she scolds gently.

Yeah, no, Tony doesn't like the way this is going. Clearing his throat he turns his face away from her and leans over to take his cup of hot chocolate off the table – Thor even thoughtfully topped it with whipped cream, even if it's the kind coming from a can. Except leaning over isn't much possible these days, what with his belly having the size of a giant watermelon, so he ends up with his hand hovering halfway to the cup, looking like an idiot. At least it has the intended effect of breaking the mood and distracting everybody as all three Asgardians simultaneously make to assist him, reaching towards the cup. Loki gets there first, handing it over with his eyes trying to tell Tony something, but he doesn't know what.

After handing the cup over one of Loki's hands settles in the small of Tony's back, squished between the sofa and Tony's these days considerable weight. "How are you, mother?" he asks. Tony can't tell why he's changing the topic, if it's because he knows Tony is uncomfortable with where this had been going or whether he's been uncomfortable with it himself. It's probably a mix of both, Tony figures.

After that there's some small talk, some gossip interspersed with the occasional seemingly off-hand remark; Frigga telling Loki that she was "overjoyed" upon hearing of the pregnancy, Loki telling her that he has had "much time to think", which Tony guesses is his way of telling her that he isn't going to go back to attempting to assassinate his brother. Or maybe that he won't lead other people's armies in an attempt at destroying other realms anymore. It certainly doesn't mean that he's okay with the whole not telling him he's adopted business. Thor takes the opportunity to tell Loki a couple of things as well, ostensibly addressing Frigga when he says, "I verily enjoy spending time with Loki again". Thor can be diplomatic if he wants to; he didn't say that he has Loki back, Loki likely wouldn't have appreciated that wording for a number of reasons, and neither did he imply that Loki was on the wrong path and found the light again, even if Loki is aware that it's somewhat true.

Tony gets a couple of these truths as well; they hit him like a freight train every time. Frigga says, "I have heard much of you, Tony, and I am glad and proud to welcome you into the family." Few people have felt proud of Tony on even fewer occasions, and have told him so even more rarely. Certainly nobody has ever accepted Tony into their family or even just been happy that he's associating with their friend/child/relative. And Thor had pushed the whole thing further by saying, "I could not imagine a better match for my brother." Tony had known Thor likes him – of course he does, they are friends, but there is a big difference between liking someone as a friend and being happy when they're fucking your brother. Especially considering how overprotective of Loki Thor is, Tony would have thought Thor had at best resigned himself to their being involved. When Thor had called Tony "brother" earlier, Tony had dismissed it as being some sort of formality for his mother's benefit. Thor's words now make him think it might have been more than that.

Loki doesn't say anything about or to Tony, for which Tony is unspeakably grateful. He's not sure he'd be able to deal with more of that.

About half an hour after her unexpected arrival Frigga leaves again, kissing both her sons plus Tony on the cheeks before heading to the roof and basically vanishing. She didn't even yell up at the sky like Thor has to when he wants to go to Asgard.

As soon as she's gone Thor and Loki share a look, Thor's eyes wide and Loki's narrowed to slits. "A word," Loki snaps. Without another word the two of them head out of the room, deeply involved in a staring match; it feels like something of a ritual.

Tony is left behind on the sofa, having to heave himself up – which is fucking difficult, thank you very much, and his back aches, his weight centre is off and oh yeah, the baby is kicking his bladder. To make his humiliation complete Natasha and Clint slink into the room, wide-eyed and curious. "Was that who I think it was?" Natasha asks, reaching out without prompting to pull Tony the rest of the way up.

"If you think it was their mom, then yes, that was who you think it was," Tony snaps, waddling off to pee. Clint has mostly stopped with his witty comments on all the things funny about Tony right now (mainly due to very stern talking-tos by all the Avengers individually and independently, and Natasha reportedly had used fists rather than words) but Tony still isn't too comfortable being very pregnant in his presence. He knows perfectly well what Clint is thinking after all.

After the bathroom break Tony puts on headphones – the only way to listen to loud music for him at the moment – and curls up in bed, knowing perfectly well that as soon as he's horizontal or vaguely comfortable (the two are not correlative anymore these days), he'll drop off to sleep.

Some time later he wakes up feeling disoriented and with his ears hurting. He, naturally, has to pee again, and Jarvis informs him that the others (even Loki) are out because there had been an emergency – an Avengers type. Tony is barred from knowing any details, and also from any TV, the internet and even his mobile phone. Basically, while the others are out on Avengers type missions he's locked out from any means to get information as to how they're doing.

Because Tony is alone and thus doesn't have to be embarrassed about his mood swings (he has had ample opportunity to get used to them by this point) he has a good cry. Feeling marginally better, he afterwards has some food, throwing tuna, honey-roasted peanuts plus an extra spoonful of honey, fruit and vanilla sauce into a bowl and eating the whole thing while watching an old episode of Stargate he picks randomly. Unfortunately it's the one where an alien originally living as a crystal takes on O'Neill's form and goes back to Earth in his place. It doesn't start out very dramatic at the beginning and the last time Tony watched it has been years ago so his memory is faint, but it doesn't stay as harmless. The alien finds out about Charlie, O'Neill's dead son, and it all gets very dramatic and emotional very quickly. By the end of it Tony is sobbing into his bowl, which is just great. He only watches to the end because he vaguely remembers that the ending was hopeful – and if he remembers that much, he should have remembered the terrible part in the middle, but then, the first time he watched it he probably hadn't been pregnant and thus emotionally unusually sensitive.

Once it's over Tony watches a couple of episodes of My Little Pony; they at least won't make him cry. He doesn't really fall asleep, he just dozes a little, curled up on the sofa with a couple of pillows between his knees and under his belly and under his head. And a blanket, because he tends to get cold when he dozes or sleeps (hence his preference of falling asleep on people lately).

Eventually the others come back; Tony stirs a little but there's no point to trying to get up. By the time he'll even just have managed to sit up the others will have wandered off to do their own thing anyway. After a mission they all just need some time for themselves, each having their own ritual to wind down.

Loki doesn't seek solitude this time; sometimes he does, sometimes he doesn't, but Tony has noticed that if it isn't Loki, it's one of the others that will check up on him afterwards. It mostly frustrates him, all this coddling, but unfortunately empirical evidence is against him. Tony is much more likely to be moody for much longer if they don't show him that he isn't completely unimportant right now, even though he is.

"Hey," Loki says, deliberately blocking Tony's view of the TV when he crouches in front of him. It's a test: if Tony's mood is especially bad he'll snap at him to get out of the way, but he doesn't feel like it right now.

Loki is beautiful. It's not a new thought to Tony but he's struck with it out of nowhere. Nothing about the way Loki looks is unattractive; his body, his face, the way he moves, the way he dresses – everything about him is beautiful.

Loki looks surprised when Tony suddenly pushes himself up, simultaneously reaching out with his free hand to pull Loki into a kiss. Tony really hasn't been known to move fast lately.

Not that Loki is complaining. He immediately returns the kiss, helping Tony upright and moving into the new free space on the sofa, all the while not interrupting the kiss for one moment. It's sort of passionate, but more than anything it's wild, the way they haven't kissed in a long time. For a second Tony wonders why but then he remembers – right, because he hasn't been feeling like it. He doesn't understand why at all right now. Loki's hair is soft as Tony cards his fingers through it, and he's warm and alive and Tony doesn't want to ever let him go.

He doesn't, he really doesn't and that scares him; not because he's feeling it (which is surprising, normally that alone would have been terrifying enough – has been the cause for the odd half panic attack in the past) but because he knows he'll have to. Loki won't stay with him until the day he dies. Well, he might, if Tony dies sometime within the next few years. Just a couple of months ago he had considered that highly likely, but with the pregnancy and the child the odds have changed. Tony can't die, at least not before the child is old enough. He doesn't know yet what this means effectively (or rather, he hasn't yet manned up and acknowledged it to himself), but changes are afoot.

And Loki won't wait around. In twenty years, when Tony is approaching sixty, he won't be up for much anymore, and from then on things will just continue going downhill. Tony has no illusions about that. At best, Loki might stick around as a friend, but Loki's patience is limited. He won't be there every day, and he certainly won't hold Tony's hand when his body starts to fail, much less kiss him like this anymore. Or at all.

So, Tony's having a weepy day. Loki is confused when Tony's mood drops abruptly but he probably has some experience in dealing with Tony's rapid mood swings by this point. Supposedly they should have waned in the second trimester and only come back a little towards the end of the third but Tony's been sensitive all the way through. It's not pleasant but in his good moments Tony would rather have this than morning sickness during the whole pregnancy, as some other women on the pregnancy websites Tony trolls have had. This is not a good moment; Tony interrupted what was a very nice making out session by starting to cry, and now instead of possibly being on his way to getting laid Loki has to hold him and pat him on his back while he gets his shirt wet. Tony would much rather throw up right now.

"What is it?" Loki eventually asks carefully. He has a reason to be tentative; asking that question can go either way. Sometimes it makes Tony cry harder, at other times it… doesn't. Which is about as good as it gets, except for those rare times when Tony starts laughing because he's being really ridiculous.

Tony doesn't cry harder this time; he just waves it away. "It's not important." He doesn't know whether it's ridiculous to have Loki comfort him while Tony cries over the fact that he's going to lose him, but there's no point explaining it all. It'd just make things awkward, or worse, it'd make Loki feel guilty and try to stay with him for longer out of that guilt. It's not his fault he's immortal and Tony isn't, or that Tony isn't really all that interesting once you take the superficial away.

Loki accepts that with an unmoving expression, just pulls out a handkerchief out of nowhere and cleans Tony's face up. Tony can only deal with that for a little bit; sooner rather than later he takes the handkerchief away from Loki and cleans himself up, taking the opportunity to hide his eyes for a second. "Is everyone alright?" he asks then. He isn't being selfish for only asking now; Loki would have told him immediately if anybody had been hurt. Jarvis would have informed him as soon as it happened if it had been anything serious. Tony's just trying to change the topic.

"Yes," Loki replies. "Amora begged for attention, that's why they asked me to help. Clint spent some time in suspended animation while Natasha was transformed into a kitten, but nobody got hurt."

That's nice to know. Tony doesn't like Amora; she's hot, yeah, but the stark raving mad bit makes her fairly unattractive. Nevermind that it hadn't done the same thing at all for Loki three years ago; Amora is just nuts.

"Tony?" Steve pokes his head into the living room. His timing is so perfect it's likely he's been hovering, just waiting for the right moment. Tony would be embarrassed but he's too tired and anyway, during the past couple of months he's had his fair share of extreme mood swings, company notwithstanding. Each member of the Avengers has been present at one point or the other.

"Hey Steve," Tony greets his best friend tiredly. "You okay?"

"Yeah, everything's good," Steve replies, properly stepping into the room. "I'm going to make dinner, any special wishes?"

Tony shrugs. "Not really. Anything you make is good."

That makes Steve smile, surprised and honest. "Okay, I'll improvise, it'll be ready in about an hour."

Once Steve is gone again Loki glances towards the TV. Jarvis turned down the volume when Tony started to drift but it's still My Little Pony episodes running. "You know the lock's been lifted," Loki says, referring to Jarvis blocking all sort of live footage and any means to receive information from the outside while the Avengers are out on a mission. "Want to watch something else?"

Tony shrugs, not caring much. He'll probably fall asleep again anyway, so it doesn't matter.

Loki looks at him closely, brows furrowed with worry. "You're tired again?"

Again or still, one of the two. It's not like it makes much of a difference.

"Anything else?" Loki cups Tony's face. "How are you?"

Tony grimaces. "Can't you tell?" He knows that Loki checks him out regularly. How regularly he doesn't know, but often. Not that he minds, it's comforting to know that Loki will know immediately if something is wrong with the child.

"I'd rather you tell me."

With a sigh at this exercise in the unnecessary, Tony starts to list. "Tired. Headache, back hurts, feet hurt. Mood swings, you might have noticed that one. And, of course, as always I need to pee."

Loki nods. "Want to take a bath together?"

Smart idea. If Tony were to take a bath alone he'd fall asleep and maybe drown, he almost did it once before, scaring everybody he lives with, himself included. "Might as well," Tony agrees. He doesn't really have the motivation, would rather take a nap, but he does enjoy not feeling his weight for some time and Loki is worried enough already. Tony's spent most of the day sleeping.

Of course, even baths aren't as nice as they used to be because they can't be as hot as Tony likes. His blood pressure is rather low at the moment and anyway high temperatures aren't good for the baby. Still, it's nice; Tony has a giant bathtub and he'll never be so tired he won't enjoy the view of Loki naked, even when he's feeling like a bloated up, squishy, disgusting whale.

He enjoys twenty minutes of feeling weightless before he has to get out of the tub, despite the relatively low temperature of the water. But he feels a little lightheaded and knows that it's time to get out of there. Loki helps him get dry – Tony isn't very bendy right now, he can't even see his feet – and afterwards massages his back and his feet. Loki's massages are the very best, not only because he uses a special sort of oil that has a soothing, warming effect but also because he heats his hands. Within fifteen minutes he's turned Tony to half-coherent putty.

"You look happy," Steve comments when Tony comes back into the kitchen. He sounds surprised and immediately guilty for it.

Tony doesn't care; he's floating on a cloud of warm bliss, most aches having faded to dullness. The pain in his back never goes away, but the ache in his head and feet is almost completely gone. He has a feeling the smile he sends in Steve's direction is vaguely dopey but he doesn't care about that either. There definitely is some silent communication via glances going on behind his back, between Steve and Loki and Bruce and Clint who are already seated at the table, but Tony can't muster up enough annoyance at that to express it. Being patronized is part of his daily life these days; on occasion he explodes and he complains even more often, but neither has any lasting effect.

He sits down in his special chair, which is actually Fury's office chair. It's a great chair with perfect back support that has for exactly that reason become Tony's designated place in the kitchen once the back ache had set in permanently. Fury hadn't been impressed by his top agents' behavior – ever since Clint and Natasha abducted Tony in it they had held the chair hostage and refused to give it back – and had sent over Coulson to recover it several times. It had taken them a while to figure out the origin of Coulson's frequent visits; the agent never said a word. He just came over, made small talk over a cup of coffee or participated in whatever they were doing at the time (he was a badass at poker, to exactly nobody's surprise) and then left again. Fury had eventually given up. Coulson still visits them regularly.

Dinner is nice; they tell him in detail what had happened with Amora earlier in the day and Tony tries not to feel completely superfluous. It's difficult because it seems like all he does these days is sit indoors, cry, sleep, eat and watch TV. The worst part is that he's starting to suspect that it won't get any better after the birth because it's not like Tony can go out and risk his life with a newborn waiting at home.

They watch some TV afterwards – the others do, Tony dozes on Thor instead. Steve and Thor are great for falling asleep on (Tony doesn't like to call it cuddling, but that's probably what it is because he isn't asleep all the time strictly speaking) because they're the tallest and most muscular. Not that Loki isn't great, but he's more wiry. He's still who Tony likes the best, but it's because of less practical reasons.

Then again, Tony ponders blurrily, Loki does this thing where he lays his hand in the small of Tony's back right where it hurts and warms it. If it weren't too difficult and if the pain weren't relatively bearable right now, he would get off Thor and move onto Loki instead. As it is, Thor is comfortable enough. Tony even lets Thor cop a feel of his belly; the baby is kicking but Thor wisely doesn't comment or otherwise draw anybody's attention to that fact.

When the movie is over they all withdraw to their own rooms. Thor is clearly reluctant to let Tony (or rather the baby, that's what Tony considers more likely of the two) go but doesn't make a fuss.

"He wasn't much involved with my first three children," Loki tells Tony. And not at all with the later three, Tony knows that. Loki had spent a couple of decades completely out of contact with his family after what happened with Váli and Nari, completely understandable if you ask Tony. He'd had Fenrir, Jörmungandr and Hela in that time. Their banishment had been Loki's first contact with Odin in over half a century; nice one, that.

"So you mean that he's trying to make up for it?"

Loki shrugs. "How would I know? We never talked about it. When I had Váli and Nari he was too busy waging war and getting drunk to be involved much, not to mention when I had Sleipnir."

Tony blinks and pauses with one knee on the bed. "You never talked about it?"

"No." Not looking at him, Loki gets into bed.

Tony follows him slowly, arranging himself with his assortment of pillows. "Not about this child either?"

"No," Loki says. His tone is final as he curls around Tony's back, wrapping one arm around his waist. When his hand comes to rest on Tony's belly Tony knows he's checking the child. Apparently everything is alright, because Loki doesn't say anything and soon falls asleep.

Tony doesn't. Normally he'd doze a little, maybe even sleep; when he first goes to bed he's generally okay. But right now he doesn't even manage that much.

Thor and Loki didn't talk about the child. They apparently didn't talk about any of Loki's children, but Tony can't stop thinking about it. He doesn't doubt that their child is important to Loki – how can he, with what all Loki did to make it safe for both the child and Tony – but… it does something with him, that even now they haven't talked about it. Despite the fact that the circumstances have never been better for it, what with Tony being Thor's good friend and them all living in the same place.

Eventually, after some tossing and turning (which is a lot more difficult than it sounds these days) Tony nevertheless manages to doze off a little, but he wakes up at around three am because he's uncomfortable and his back aches and he needs to pee.

After the bathroom break Tony heads over to the kitchen to eat some pickles. Yes, he's a walking cliché these days but he lately rather enjoys pickles, so sue him. He doesn't bother switching on the lights; he can navigate perfectly well in the dark with only the watery moonlight to aid him.

As he sits there in his chair, glass with pickles balancing on his belly while he eats, he decides not to be bothered by Loki and Thor's family problems. Yeah, he'd prefer for them to make up, but if they're both too stubborn and too childish to do that he's not going to bother getting worked up over it. Whatever, it has nothing to do with him anyway. He and his stupid insecurities can stuff it.

A noise from the living room distracts him just when he's about to get really annoyed with himself and any Asgardians in the vicinity. It's not scary, only surprising; there is no way any intruders would have made their way in without Jarvis letting him know. Curious, Tony heaves himself up to check it out, taking the glass of pickles with him.

The living room is dark and seems empty at first glance, but Tony hears another noise, like a glass bottle being put down on the floor. Thoroughly confused, Tony approaches the former bar. Steve had tried to argue for its removal once he had finally managed to convince Tony to go off alcohol, but Tony had refused that. He hadn't been an actual alcoholic, there had been no need to remove temptation from him.

Except maybe a little. After a couple of days, Tony had had Pepper and Steve take away all the alcohol; not to be discarded, but away from being so readily available to him. Not because he had needed them to, but because it had been more difficult for him than he would have thought. Tony had changed the bar afterwards, making it into a sort of second, small workshop equipped with a bunch of computer access fields. Security locked, of course, which has nothing to do with how much he trusts his team and a lot with his inert paranoia.

Now, Tony finds Natasha sitting on the floor behind it, an almost completely empty bottle of vodka in her hand. Her legs are stretched out in front of her and her head is leaning against the wall. She clearly isn't anywhere close to sober.

She snorts derisively when she spots hi. "Of course you'd find me," she sneers, but it seems to be aimed at herself instead of him.

"Uh, hi," Tony replies, floundering. He doesn't really know how to deal with this situation; normally when people are drunk around him he's drunk himself. The number of times he's been the sober one can be counted on one hand. "Everything alright?" Not that Natasha has never been drunk before, the Avengers have had some spectacular parties in their time, but that's quite different to getting drunk alone in the dark, sitting on the cold floor in an empty room. And everyone knows that at night, rooms are even emptier and even bigger than any other time.

"Do I look like I'm alright?" Natasha rolls her eyes with more exaggeration than necessary and almost loses her balance with the motion.

"No, really not," Tony replies honestly, getting a little closer and supporting himself with one hand on the counter. "What's up?"

Her eyes immediately focus on his belly. It's hard to overlook at the best of times these days, but this is way past curious staring. Something on her face – it's hard to see in the dark – worries Tony.

She doesn't reply for a while, just stares at his belly, and Tony tentatively approaches her, inching closer, careful to telegraph his movements. Not that that's too difficult right now, he is anything but fast. "Natasha?"

"You don't even enjoy it, do you?" she asks. Her voice is hard but to his horror, Tony sees her lower lip wobble.

Swallowing, Tony considers pretending not to know what she's talking about but she doesn't open up often, and clearly she isn't feeling good at the moment. When he was in a mood like that, with alcohol to supplement it, he hated being patronized. Well, he hates it any time, no matter his mood or anything else, but especially then. "Sometimes I do," he eventually replies, honest about this as he rarely is these days. "I don't really have the energy for much enjoyment at the moment, though." Or for anything else.

She looks away. "The others are pretty worried about that." Even though she doesn't include herself, Tony knows she is worried as well. "Clint won't talk about anything else."

Ah. That might be where her problem lies. Tony briefly considers sitting down next to her but if he does that he'll never get up again, and she doesn't seem to be in a condition where she has enough balance to help him up. "Come off this cold floor, let's sit down on the sofa."

Unusually placid, she obeys, heaving herself up and heading towards the sofa. She wavers on her feet and Tony helplessly reaches out, but she doesn't fall over. It's a good thing because Tony doesn't know if he would've been able to prevent her from splitting her head open on the stone floor.

Natasha curls up in the corner of the sofa, hugging the bottle to her like a beloved friend. That is something Tony is also familiar with, but that was before the Avengers. He doesn't at all like the thought of one of his friends – his family, for all intents and purposes – feeling like that.

Sitting down at the other end of the sofa, Tony bumps his feet into hers, knowing that if he doesn't let her forget she isn't alone she'll feel better. Hopefully.

"Clint talks about my sleeping habits a lot?" he prompts carefully. He wishes someone else were here, someone more sensitive to other people. He doesn't have any experience with this sort of thing.

"The baby," Natasha pronounces very carefully. Her voice is bleak.

Oh. Suddenly Tony remembers how Bruce had tested their blood all these months ago when they hadn't known yet what was going on except that a number of them were feeling sick in the mornings. Natasha had said "I'm fine," voice hard. During their MRTs she had sat in her seat with her arms crossed, staring stonily at the wall. At the time Tony had thought she'd been pissed that her morning routine had been interrupted, but maybe that hadn't been all.

Pushing aside his puzzlement at Clint being interested in the baby – so far, all Clint had had to say on the subject was teasing Tony for various pregnancy symptoms he might or might not be displaying – Tony makes a leap. "You want to have a baby."

She gives a wet laugh that it ends in a sob. Clapping a hand on her mouth she curls up even harder, hiding her face behind her knees. Maybe Tony shouldn't have been so blunt, but he and Natasha are built on tough love. Most of their communication is made of snark and hard truths stated with no qualms. Neither of them would appreciate being treated with kid gloves by the other all of a sudden at all.

"No," Natasha says eventually. Her smile when she puts her knees down is bleak. She doesn't even bother wiping the wetness off her face.

"Then I don't understand what's going on," Tony admits.

"I'm not fit to be a parent."

That's not really an answer, but Tony decides to roll with it. She's drunk, she probably can't focus very well right now.

Giving a bitter laugh, Tony spreads his arms. "I'm not either. Don't pretend you don't think so." Where everybody else tried to placate, Natasha has always been the one to tell him the truth without any cushioning. But his fitness to be a parent isn't why she's sitting here getting drunk all alone, so he quickly continues, "And that has nothing to do with anything. Many people who want or even have children aren't fit to be parents." His parents among them. Nudging her feet with his toes he orders not unkindly, "Tell me the truth now. Do you want a baby or not?"

"What, you offering yours?"

Tony just looks at her until she drops the hard look, turns her face away. "Yes," she admits, voice very small.

Now they're getting somewhere. "But you can't have any."

Biting her lower lip, she shakes her head. "I was sterilized when I was seven."

Well, damn. Tony doesn't know why anyone would need to sterilize a child. Or rather, he doesn't want to know – doesn't want to be able to figure it out.

"Maybe you could adopt one?" Even as he suggests it, Tony knows that it won't make anything better. It doesn't change that she isn't able to have children herself.

She sneers derisively. "Didn't you listen? I'm not fit to be a parent."

"You're damn more suited for it than I am," Tony snaps back. "Of all the Avengers, you would be who I'd trust with the child the most."

Wide-eyed, she sits up to stare at him, vodka sloshing around in the bottle. "Not Steve?"

"He's godfather," Tony replies, which isn't really an answer. Of course he'd trust Steve, but he isn't sure Steve would sacrifice his ideals for the child.

Her eyes go even wider. "You want to make me godmother?"

Well, that hadn't been exactly what Tony said, but he hadn't thought about it before and now that he does, it seems like a good idea. Originally he hadn't meant to make Steve godfather either, but then he had thought about it and realized that he better take precautions so the child is taken care of, should both he and Loki die. Steve is not only his best friend but also the most responsible person he knows. And the child probably needs a godmother as well – if it turns out to be a girl, some female role models might not be a bad idea. And Natasha is an excellent choice.

"Yes." There's no need to discuss it with Loki; he hadn't cared much when Tony had talked to him about making Steve the godfather a couple of weeks ago.

Natasha stares at him. "But… what about Pepper?"

Tony rolls his eyes. "Pepper hates children." She had been so angry that, when they had been together, she had been continuously asked when they'd have offspring. "As if that's the highlight of my life," she had raved. "As if my whole professional career isn't worth a damn because I can grow a baby in my belly and that's clearly so much more important." Tony hadn't been very impressed either. He had never planned to have children, being in a stable relationship didn't change that at all.

Look at him now. It's almost funny. No stable relationship but a child on the way, and he's the one growing it.

"Maria?" Natasha fishes, looking strangely desperate.

Tony stares at her. "Hill? I don't even really know her. I mean, don't get me wrong, she's a capable agent, but that's not something that would make her suitable to take care of my child."

"But why me?" she asks. She looks so young all of a sudden, lost.

Nudging her feet again with his toes, Tony explains. "Steve is a complete push over. You would make sure the child won't turn into a complete brat." There are a lot of other things but they don't need saying; that he has no doubts that she (as Steve) would die defending his child's life. That she would go even further, give up everything to ensure his child's safety, including her ideals, which Tony honestly isn't sure Steve would do. That she (like Steve) wouldn't foist the child off to some nanny. Tony isn't so sure that Clint wouldn't. And Bruce is, unfortunately, not an option – no matter how suitable he is, children aren't conductive to a calm life and the Hulk might have calmed down some since Bruce stopped treating him as the enemy, but that doesn't make him fit to be responsible for a child. Tony has no qualms about Bruce or possibly even Hulk in a calm moment being around his baby, but he isn't comfortable with the idea of them being solely responsible for it.

Natasha covers her face with both hands, dropping the bottle carelessly on the floor. In order to give her some resemblance of privacy Tony turns the TV on, low-level noise filling the room and making her feel less like he's paying attention to her every move. Which he isn't; he has some recent experience with crying in company and knows exactly what she needs. Not for him to go away, that'll only make her feel alone and abandoned, but also not for him to pet her and shush her and talk nonsense. He just nudges her feet again and stares at the TV.

This goes well for about half an hour; then Tony has to pee again. He says as much, but when he waddles back into the living room she's gone. Not quite sure whether he managed to make her feel at all better, Tony waddles over to the bar to pick up the jar of pickles he left there earlier.

It turns out Natasha is in the kitchen, drying her wet face. She looks red and raw and won't meet his eyes, but she goes back to the living room, curling up on her end of the sofa again.

They watch some late night TV, settling for a documentary about "earth after humanity". It's vaguely interesting, but Tony dozes off nevertheless. When he wakes up some time later Natasha has laid down between Tony's back and the back of the sofa; the TV is still on, almost completely mute. Tony takes his pee break and returns, lying back down and rearranging his pillows. He zaps around a little before he has Jarvis find a documentary for him while he tries to find a comfortable position. Grumpily, Natasha puts one hand on his hip to stop him from moving but really, it's not like Tony is doing it on purpose.

The next time Tony wakes up it's morning and Natasha is curled up along his back. Someone is moving around in the kitchen; they're not being loud, just the usual noises of the coffee machine being turned on, getting silverware out of the drawer, that sort of thing. With a yawn Tony shifts, peering at the digital clock on his TV. It's half past five in the morning, that means it's probably Steve in the kitchen. After pushing himself up slowly, both in order to be quiet and so he won't get dizzy, Tony takes his pee break and then heads over into the kitchen.

"Morning," Steve greets him, sounding not very surprised. Not that people generally are these days when Tony finds them in the middle of the night.

"Hey." Tony yawns and lets Steve bring him his fruit bowl.

"Sleep well?" Steve asks as he puts it down in front of him.

Tony doesn't bother replying with words, just sends him a very nasty glare while stabbing at some banana with a spoon. It turns the banana into mush, but it sends the proper message.

Once the fruit salad is gone Tony heads back to bed. Loki is still asleep but stirs when Tony gets in. "You okay?"

"Yeah. Made Natasha godmother."

Irritation flits briefly across Loki's face. "Why didn't you talk to me about it?"

Tony sends him a look as he stuffs pillows under his belly, settling in facing Loki. "You didn't seem to care much when I made Steve godfather."

Loki frowns. "Of course I care. This is my child we're talking about."

Tony just looks at him for a moment, irritated and not really knowing why.

Sighing, Loki shifts closer until he's pressed along Tony's front, primarily his belly. "Why are you angry?"

"I don't know." Tony frowns. He's pissed about what has been done to Natasha, but that's no reason to be annoyed with everybody else. "Why didn't you make Natasha fake pregnant when you did it to the others?"

"That would've been cruel," Loki replies, rolling with the change in topic. "Because she can't have
children."

But men don't either, Tony wants to say, but that's different on Asgard, and Tony still doesn't really get it. The Asgardians are charmingly unconcerned with gender stereotypes, not battling an eyelash at anybody's sexuality, people being transgender or men being pregnant.

"Could you… change that?" Tony doesn't know why he's asking, it's none of his business and Natasha probably wouldn't appreciate it, but what if it turns out to be no problem for Loki? She clearly is hurting, and Loki might be able to make it stop.

Loki's next words tear any hopes Tony might have had in that direction down. "No." He even looks genuinely regretful about it. "Once a wound is healed there is nothing magic can do about it. Magic can't restore what has been taken away."

Well, so much for that.

"Is that why you made her godmother? Because she can't have any children herself?"

"Partly," Tony admits. "But I thought about it, and she's the best option next to Steve, no matter her gender or whether she can have children herself." He frowns. "Or do you want it to be someone else?" Not that Tony is willing to take it back. As far as he knows they don't have godparents on Asgard anyway (technically all parents on Asgard are godparents, get it?) anyway.

"No." Loki frowns. "Godparents are parents who are supposed to raise the child if both parents die, correct?"

"Yeah."

"That is unlikely to happen nowadays," Loki explains. "And if it did, the parents of the parents would raise the child, or possibly siblings if one of them already has a family."

"Well, my parents are dead, and I wouldn't trust Odin with a potted cactus, much less my baby," Tony snaps.

Loki glares. "Are you implying I would?"

"No."

The frown doesn't drop from Loki's face, but it subsides a little. "Thor might be an acceptable choice these days, if he has Jane at his side. She would be good to explain about the child's human heritage, and she's a scientist as well."

"Well, yeah, but Thor is uncle already anyway. Besides, I think they all would be involved."

"They will be anyway," Loki argues. "It's not like it matters." When Tony stills and starts to glare, getting properly furious (it doesn't matter? Their child's wellbeing doesn't matter?) he frowns. "We are not going to die. Why are you so occupied thinking about death?"

"Well, excuse me for having some foresight," Tony hisses, pushing Loki away. He's really annoyed with him now. "And maybe you are not going to die that easily, but I might." And it's not that he's never been as aware of that as now; he'd spent two months having to lug a car battery around with him while he built a better energy source for the magnet that protects his heart. There had been some trouble with that too, when his belly had started to get bigger, leaving less room for his other organs. His heart had moved, but the arc reactor hadn't; Tony had almost had a heart attack and they'd been ready to crack his chest open even further to move the arc reactor accordingly. Tony had ended up having to increase the magnetic field. It had been a tense couple of days, even without how freaked out he had been when he had found out that a baby pushes all other organs in the mother (or father) aside, including the heart. For some reason he had never realized this, even though it's only logical. Sure, it's not like he ever spent much time thinking about the inner workings of pregnancy, but it's incredibly freaky.

All that aside, there are so many ways for Tony to die. He might die during the c-section; it's not like any doctor on Midgard has had to perform one on a man before. They've taken an MRI and are pretty sure how to do it, but still, the risk is bigger for Tony than it is for women.

Loki's face goes hard. "You're not. I'm not going to let you."

"I appreciate the sentiment, but there might not be anything you can do about it," Tony snaps. For example if Loki isn't there. Or if he has to make a choice between protecting the child and Tony.

"Sentiment," Loki hisses. "You appreciate the sentiment?" He sits up, glaring furiously. "Do you want to die?"

"No, but I'm going to at one point!" Tony struggles to pushes himself upright as well. "Denial and the refusal to talk about it isn't going to change that!" The baby kicks furiously at his rise in heartbeat and probably also at their loud voices, so he puts a hand on his belly.

"No, you're not," Loki hisses, glancing at Tony's belly but focusing back on his face again after having ascertained that nothing is wrong. "I weaved our life forces together. It's going to make it very difficult for you to die."

Tony stops short. "You… what?"

Loki glares. "Did you really think I would have let you die? You humans die at the drop of a hat, of course I was going to do something about it. You're my child's mother."

For a moment, all Tony can do is gape. "You made me immortal? Because of the child?"

"I did it because of the child," Loki snaps. "I wanted to do it for a while before that. I'm a selfish person and I didn't like the idea of leaving you to Lady Death just because of your unfortunately ephemeral race."

That… wow. Okay. Tony doesn't know what to do with that at all. There's way too much for him to process. For one, that Loki wants to keep him around at all, then that he's been wanting to for a while, thirdly that he did it because of the child, and last but not least that he did it at all. Without Tony's permission.

Tony doesn't know how to feel. Angry? Hurt? Happy? And he does feel all these, but mainly he's confused, and as always exhausted.

As he tends to when he feels too much, Tony concentrates on facts. "What does it mean? Am I like you and Thor now?"

Loki shakes his head. "Remember the shield I protected you with?" Tony nods. Of course he does, he still feels a conflicting mix of guilt and gratefulness for it. "It's like that. If something extraordinary zaps at your life force, the bond I created will use mine instead."

"Something extraordinary?"

"Like a big wound, or a spell," Loki clarifies. "Something that would otherwise kill you."

"So not normal life." That's relieving to know. Tony doesn't have many qualms where magic is concerned and Loki checking his body through, but he can only do that when he touches Tony. The thought that he might have been able to do it no matter where either of them is hadn't been comfortable.

That cleared up, his thoughts immediately latch on to something else. "Did you really want to do it before?"

Loki frowns. "Yes. Why would I not?"

Shrugging, Tony pulls at the oversized t-shirt he sleeps in, avoiding Loki's eyes. True, Loki hasn't been living with them for that long yet; just about three months. Not that much time yet to get terribly bored, especially not with the pregnancy. Though that one sure prevents them from doing most of the things Tony enjoys most and makes the rest of them at least more difficult. What with the child, Tony estimated Loki will stay with them for a couple of years yet. But eventually he'll move on. Tony doesn't know what Loki thinks of separation in the sense that it means the parents will share the child somehow, but he knows that Loki has been properly divorced before at least twice. On Asgard they don't have restraining views on monogamy and staying with one partner for the rest of one's life – naturally, considering how Asgardians lives are very long.

Tony's life, it seems like, is as well. Aging isn't an extraordinary strain on his life force, but Loki must have done something about it because he said Tony won't die. That means it's inevitable Loki is going to leave.

Suddenly Tony realizes how precarious his situation is. Right now it doesn't make much of a difference unless Tony gets injured, but in a couple of years Loki will be the only thing standing between Tony and aging and eventual death. That'll be incredibly awkward at the very least.

"Tony?" Putting both hands on Tony's shoulders Loki leans in, peering at his face. "Why do you think I wouldn't want to have you around for longer?"

"Why would you?" Tony waves it off and moves on to more important things. "Can you take it away?"

"What?" Loki's expression is a mix of confusion and anger.

"That thing you did so I won't die," Tony says.

Loki stares at him, expression icy.

"You can do it after the birth, if you want," Tony offers, half as a compromise and half because it seems acceptable to keep it until then, if only to ensure the child will be okay. Not that Tony wants to die, but he's undergone an epic shift in priorities the past couple of months. He himself can no longer be his number one priority.

"Very well," Loki says tightly. Then he vanishes.

Tony stares at the empty space where Loki has been for a long time before lying back down. He doesn't sleep any more that night.

At around eight am Tony finally gets out of bed and has some breakfast. He meets Bruce in the kitchen who quizzes him about his health, trying to find out where his "extreme fatigue" might be coming from. Tony knows where it's coming from; he doesn't sleep at night. When Bruce wants to know why Tony just shrugs. It's rather difficult for him to find a comfortable position and it doesn't stay comfortable for long; additionally, having to pee every hour isn't conductive to a good night's sleep. Bruce isn't very happy with that and demands a tribute of blood.

After any needles have been removed from his body Tony goes to play in his workshop. His concentration is pretty shot these days, his thoughts keep drifting away and he has a hard time focusing, but it's good enough to play around either with some of his more idle, utopian ideas or optimizing already existing concepts. Every now and then he takes short, fifteen minute naps.

A knock on his glass door pulls him out of his thoughts; it's Thor.

With a confused frown, Tony walks over to him. "Hey, what's up?"

Thor's expression is grave. "I wish to talk to you, brother Tony."

That again. Tony wonders where this brother thing suddenly comes from. "Okay… where?"

"The kitchen is empty," Thor informs him. A brief amused smile plays around his lips. "I'm not the only one who wishes to speak to you."

Well, doesn't that sound like buckets full of fun. The kitchen has even been prepared for Tony; there is a plateful of the casserole they apparently had for lunch, some salad and a glass of mango juice set out for Tony.

"We were saddened when you didn't join us for dinner," Thor says.

Yeah, Tony had napped halfway in and then hadn't felt like making his way up the stairs. The others would have felt like they had to stay until he was done eating and it just would have been awkward.

"So…" Tony stretches, picking the casserole apart with his fork. Potato, peppers, onions, carrots, peas, some minced meat… it looks like Steve threw a couple of leftovers together, he has the tendency to do that. Steve hates throwing food away. "What did you want to talk to me about?"

"My brother came to speak to me this morning," Thor says seriously. Great. Well, Tony is happy to know where Loki vanished to, but still. "He thought it better for me to discuss some things with you instead, as I am not as emotionally involved as he." This is sounding better and better. Thor hesitates, clearly thinking about how to put his next words. "There are some issues that are best discussed between the two of you. What I wonder is why you wish for Loki to take back the joining of your life forces."

Wonderful. Just great. Tony briefly considers telling Thor that it's none of his business, but if he talks about it with Loki they'll just end up fighting again. Or that thing they do nowadays that isn't quite fighting because they don't yell at each other and also don't fuck hard during, after and to make up. It takes out all the fun there is to be had in a fight.

"It ties Loki to me," Tony explains, hoping that that'll be enough. When Thor doesn't get it he sighs and elaborates. "It means he'll forever be responsible for me, even when he won't want to anymore."

Thor looks at him for a long moment. "I would not have thought you of all people would think so little of yourself as to underestimate the regard my brother has for you when it is plain to see for everybody else."

Right. What is Tony supposed to say for that? Not that he thinks Thor is naïve, he's just… very inclined to think the absolute best of Loki. Not that it makes Loki a bad person that he won't stay with Tony forever and ever happy end amen. It's more complicated than that.

After a brief pause during which Thor stares at Tony while Tony stares down at his plate and pokes at the food, Thor sighs. "I will tell you this, my brother Tony, because my brother Loki will not. He believes your issue is that you do not wish to be connected to him." Not giving Tony a chance to react to that, Thor rises. "You should eat," he advises before leaving. Tony has a moment to wonder whether that was it before Natasha enters the kitchen.

"Tony," she says, sitting down.

"What," Tony says tiredly. "Did you take numbers? Play rock, paper, scissors to decide the order? Who else is waiting in line?" What Tony would also like to know is whether they discussed this among each other before having Thor fetch him. He has no illusions; they probably did.

"Just Bruce," she tells him, dryly amused. "I just wanted to thank you for your offer yesterday. I would like to be your child's godmother."

Tony smiles widely in relief. He hadn't been sure she would agree, hadn't been sure whether he had reacted to her crisis in a good way or in exactly the wrong way. Later it had occurred to him that it probably hadn't been too sensitive to offer her his child as a godchild, considering that the nature of her problem was that she couldn't have children on her own. "Awesome. Thank you."

Natasha rolls her eyes. "I thought about it and I realized that you'll completely pamper the poor thing if I don't put my foot down."

Yeah, she's probably right about that. Tony doesn't know the meaning of the word "restraint". The other Avengers are better at it, but both Clint and Steve are complete pushovers where children are concerned. Bruce would probably be more reliable, but fights don't work out if there's more than one person throwing a temper tantrum, and Bruce has the monopoly on epic temper tantrums. That probably wouldn't be healthy for a child.

After Natasha has left Bruce enters the kitchen, followed by Steve who frowns at Tony's barely eaten food.

"Hey, Steve, it's not your turn yet," Tony quips. Talking to Natasha has cheered him up a bit.

Bruce and Steve share a look. "We basically have the same concern," Bruce explains.

"Actually, it's something all of us worry about," Steve adds.

"Sounds ominous." Tony eyes them as the two sit down. "I assume my blood results came?" He isn't worried. If anything were wrong, Loki would have found and fixed it immediately.

Bruce nods. "Yes. Due to the fact that you've had to produce a lot of blood during weeks twenty-eight to thirty-two, you have a slight anemia due to iron deficiency; it accounts for some of your fatigue."

And some other things such as his feeling cold all the time, his concentration problems and the dizziness that sometimes overcomes him. Bruce had suspected from the beginning that Tony had anemia, but every time he had tested the results had come back as negative.

"Awesome. Finally I can take those iron supplements you've been hoarding for months now."

The corners of Bruce's mouth quirk up. "Yes. I've been waiting for this moment since the first MRI." Then he glances at Steve, the amusement fading from his face.

Steve shifts and bites his lower lip. "Look, Tony, we're very worried about you."

"Okay," Tony says slowly. He can't say he's ever liked a conversation that started in that manner.

"You're extremely sleepy," Steve says bluntly. "You're just not yourself. We know that some of it is normal, but we've asked, and this far exceeds normal."

"…what are you suggesting?" Tony asks. This doesn't bode well, Steve doesn't normally stall like that unless he knows people won't like whatever he's going to say next. "As I told Bruce earlier today, it's because I don't sleep well at night."

"Yes, I know." Steve glances at Bruce and takes a deep breath. "Basically, we're thinking you might be depressed."

Tony tilts his head. Before he can say anything, Steve hastily continues, "You basically check almost everything in the list of symptoms, as far as we can tell."

"Well," Tony says mildly. "I suppose I can add antenatal depression to my long list of diagnosis made by other people. It fits in right above bipolar personality disorder."

When Steve just looks at him he drops his fork and sits back, crossing his arms. "What do you want from me, Steve?"

"Just… just listen and don't immediately discard it, okay?" Steve's face is earnest, pleading.

Tony looks at him for a moment. Eventually he sighs. "Fine." He's only doing this because Steve is his best friend, he hopes they're both aware of this.

Who is he kidding, it's probably the reason Steve is the one doing most of the talking.

"Okay. Correct me if I'm wrong, but you have problems concentrating, sleep too much during the day and too little at night, your eating habits have changed, you don't really enjoy the things you used to love anymore, you're withdrawn. Am I wrong?"

Wordlessly Tony shakes his head.

Steve nods. "Now, these are guesses, but I'm pretty sure you're feeling anxious a lot, and… you just seem pretty sad to me sometimes, Tony."

Face kept perfectly blank, Tony looks at his best friend. "Are there any other points on the checklist you haven't mentioned yet?"

Steve glances at Bruce. "These I'm not sure about either. Feelings of guilt or worthlessness and recurring thoughts of death, suicide and self-harm."

Well. Tony generally has an underlying feeling of worthlessness, but he's well-practiced at burying it. Guilt – no, he can't say he feels overly guilty, at least not for anything new. The other thing he became Iron Man for, though it's been a while since he actually did that. And it will likely be a while still until he'll be able to do it again. Years, probably, which doesn't make him happy exactly. Admittedly, he also has thought of death a lot lately, but not in the sense that he wants to incur it himself.

"Yeah, no," Tony says.

Bruce leans forward a little. "And the other things?"

Tony looks away and shrugs, which for him is as good as a tearful confession. Which he's done as well recently, isn't his life awesome lately.

"Okay." Steve reaches across the table and takes Tony's hand. "It's alright. Will you let us help you?"

That's the true question. But really, Tony doesn't feel up to the arguments that will inevitably follow if he doesn't agree, so he doesn't bother. Besides, it's not like he's feeling good right now."Yeah, fine."

Steve breathes an audible sigh of relief, squeezing Tony's hand. "Great. We'll take care of it, don't worry."

Tony shrugs.

An hour later Steve sits him down in the living room, going so far as to put his arm around Tony's shoulders. He hands over a hand-written list that Tony reads through quickly.

• Rest as much as you can. Sleep when the baby is sleeping.
• Don't try to do too much or try to be perfect.
• Ask your partner, family, and friends for help.
• Make time to go out, visit friends, or spend time alone with your partner.
• Discuss your feelings with your partner, family, and friends.
• Talk with other mothers so you can learn from their experiences.
• Join a support group. Ask your doctor about groups in your area.
• Don't make any major life changes during pregnancy or right after giving birth. Major changes can cause unneeded stress. Sometimes big changes can't be avoided. When that happens, try to arrange support and help in your new situation ahead of time.

"Okay," he says slowly. "So… what?"

"Basically this: I would like for you to talk to someone. One of us, somebody else you know, just somebody. And… we would like for you to join a prenatal class."

"A prenatal class," Tony repeats. Full of pregnant women. Yeah, sounds great, how about no.

"Yes." Steve's voice is decisive; great, this is what's most important to him. "Pepper is doing research for us. She'll find a class for you."

Tony turns his head. "How did you manage that? Pepper said ages ago that she won't do anything not related to the company for me anymore." He hasn't gotten another personal assistant; he just hadn't wanted to. He has a PR team and lawyers and a couple of secretaries, that should be enough.

"She's still your friend, Tony," Steve chides gently. "And we think it will be good for you. We realized that you're really very isolated here. You can't go outside, you can't do a lot of the things you love to do, and you're undergoing a very big change in your life and body. So, you will attend one of these classes. You'll have some exercise and what's more important, the opportunity to talk to other people who are going through something similar. Pepper will have everyone sign non-disclosure agreements and everything, it will be fine."

"Except how they're all women," Tony bites.

"That doesn't mean they won't be able to relate to how you feel," Steve argues.

Tony sighs. "I'll see what Pepper digs up." It's as good as an agreement to go; Pepper is excellent at finding exactly what he needs even when he himself doesn't even know what it is.

Steve smiles happily. "Good. Now… do you want to think a bit about who you talk to? But you need to do it, you can't continue bottling it all up inside."

"I'll think about it," Tony says noncommittally. "Is that all?"

"No." Steve raises an eyebrow. "We're all going to leave for the week-end today, give you and Loki some time on your own."

Tony frowns in confusion. "Why?"

"Because we realized we're sort of hovering and not giving the two of you enough space. You'll have some time to, well." Steve flushes. "Talk. Or whatever."

Tony isn't so tired he doesn't see the golden opportunity for a lecherous remark, but he doesn't feel like making any of the ones coming to his mind. They leave a bitter taste on his tongue, considering how he doesn't even know if he and Loki are fighting or not. He hasn't seen Loki since this morning. It's not too unusual, they aren't attached at the hip, but normally Loki comes to check on him regularly. "Did you talk to Loki about it?" is all he says in the end.

"Ah, no." Steve shifts. "Loki is on… an errand. But Thor is positive Loki will appreciate it."

"On an errand," Tony repeats, nonplussed. "Where?" It can't be any shopping for the baby, they did all that already via the internet.

"Ah." Steve avoids Tony's eyes studiously, nervous behavior confirming all of Tony's suspicions: something is going on that he isn't supposed to know about. "Out?"

Right. "Jarvis, where is Loki?"

"Mr. Laufeyson left for Asgard, Sir," Jarvis replies promptly.

"What?" Tony's voice is sharp. "He's been banned! They're going to sentence him to death if he goes there!"

"No, no, it's alright," Steve soothes immediately. "He got an audience with Odin. It's fine."

Tony wants to know what the fuck Loki wants from Odin that he's willing to talk to him when he hasn't done that since the trial, and why the fuck he wasn't told. He snaps, "Do we need to have another "I'm pregnant, not mentally or physically impaired" talk?"

"I don't know more either," Steve admits. "Thor told us earlier that Loki went to Asgard, and when we were worried he said that he had an audience with Odin. He wouldn't tell us any more."

Well, isn't that wonderful. It seems Loki and Thor are unusually chummy all of a sudden. Tony doesn't mind per se – in fact he's happy for both of them, they had both clearly been hurting because of their ongoing fight – but he does not appreciate being excluded like that, or that Thor comes to him to talk about issues Tony has with Loki.

"Hey," Steve says, squeezing Tony's shoulders. "Why are you angry? Tell me."

Oh, the talking thing, great. "Isn't it obvious?"

A faint smile appears on Steve's face. "Never stopped you before."

Okay, yeah, he's right about that. Tony likes to bitch when he's pissy, so sue him. "It pisses me off how everybody treats me like I'm different," he grits, crossing his arms and staring mulishly out the window. "You guys have secret talks about me behind my back, discussing my issues and what else like it's the newest coffee klatsch topic – and for all I know it is, I'm going to have to demand rent from all the paparazzi camping outside my residences sometime soon – I don't even know if Loki and I are fighting but instead of talking to me about it he sends Thor to do it for him like we're back in kindergarten and now you sit here and coddle me like I'm made of glass instead of telling me to suck it up and get over it."

Steve licks his lips. "Okay, for one, depression is a serious illness, not something you "suck up and get over". Two, we just… we're worried about you."

"You could be worried without implying I can't take care of myself or my child at every turn," Tony snaps. "I'm doing a good job. I eat properly, I avoid stress and when I'm able to I sleep. I'm not a horrible parent."

"Of course you aren't!" The exclamation comes fast and sounds appalled enough Tony is inclined to believe Steve really means it. "Tony, you're doing a commendable job," Steve continues earnestly, even going so far as to cup Tony's chin and turn his face so he can look him in the eyes. "You're a man, you never even had to think about the possibility of becoming pregnant yourself. You never planned to have children and now you have to deal with the fact that nevertheless you'll have one, and it's going to throw your whole life over. Tony, I'm impressed how well you handled all that, and that's not even considering the additional circumstances with Loki and the whole trouble with Asgard and how incredibly stressful that was." Steve puts his hands on Tony's shoulders and looks at him seriously. "Tony, you… all this was incredibly difficult and stressful, but you still kept it together. You didn't drink, you didn't do any sort of risky behavior except that one time with the robot queen and even then you waited long enough for Loki to protect you as much as possible. You equipped the nursery, you appointed godparents and you changed your will; basically you're doing everything to ensure the baby will be comfortable and taken good care of, and it hasn't even been born yet. You're doing a great job, Tony. You're a good parent."

Tony looks at him searchingly. It's strange; yesterday he would've long since started crying in a conversation like this, but right now he doesn't really feel much except surprise and confusion that Steve thinks so highly of him. "I just ordered things on the internet," he eventually says weakly. Steve makes it sound like something extraordinary to buy toys and stuff for the baby, but in the end it was just internet shopping.

It earns him an unimpressed look. "Don't pretend you didn't spend hours comparing baby strollers and reading reviews on just about anything before you bought it."

Well, yeah, he had done that, but that's what you do in lieu of being able to touch and test the things like one would be able to in a store, right? Granted, it's not something Tony usually does, but still. It's not as extraordinary as Steve makes it sound.

When Tony doesn't argue or say anything else Steve nods as if he's made a point and changes topics. "About the other thing… we don't treat you like you are different. But the situation is different, not just for you but for all of us. None of us have ever had to deal with babies, or even children, and soon we're going to be living with one."

That makes Tony's blood run cold for one moment, but he tells himself to not be so clingy. "I can move out if you want. I have an apartment close by."

Steve gapes at him. "You… Tony, how do you do that? How do you take the worst possible meaning out of something someone says?"

"You are the one who thinks I'm depressed," Tony complains petulantly. Honestly.

"No, we don't want you to move out," Steve nearly snaps. "That isn't what I said, and it's especially not what I meant. I'm just saying that it's something we have to adjust to, all of us, and we're not doing a good job, and I'm sorry. You have to tell us what we do wrong, though, or we might not notice."

Oh, that's brilliant. "I did. You didn't listen."

"We're not touching your belly anymore, and the only one who asks about how the baby is doing is Bruce," Steve points out, reminding Tony of the epic tantrum he had thrown because people kept touching him. Just because his belly was hard to ignore and because a baby was growing in it didn't mean everybody suddenly was allowed to touch it whenever they felt like. Where had all their personal space issues vanished to? It used to be that Tony got an elbow in the ribs when he just threw an arm around someone's shoulders.

"You still patronize me," Tony replies. "And… you can ask about the baby. But for a while it was all you would talk about, like I'm a walking incubator or something."

Steve cringes. "I'm sorry. We can back off a little."

That amuses Tony a little. "You already did." Almost too much. Tony's feelings are all over the place currently; he had gotten the impression they were getting fed up with the whole baby business. As Steve had said, none of them had signed up for this and they didn't even have to be involved.

"Right." Steve ducks his head. "It's just, we all feel a little like we're getting a nephew or niece. I mean, we're basically a family already; we live together, we work together, we're more involved emotionally with each other than just friends would be."

And Tony was doing so well on the not crying front. He hates this. He never used to cry, or at least not without copious amounts of alcohol in his blood, taking all responsibility off his shoulders.

Steve clears his throat and gives him a moment, looking away but not removing his arm from around Tony's shoulders. "So, I have a question," he asks after a while.

Tony takes a deep breath. "Shoot." There. His voice didn't even wobble. He's awesome. Well, he isn't, but it will probably amount to his greatest achievement of the day.

"Is that the baby kicking?" Steve motions towards where Tony is leaning into him, belly pressed against his side.

"Yeah. Reason number three why I can't sleep at night."

Completely captivated, Steve stares at Tony's belly. "What's reason number one and two?" he asks absently.

Tony rolls his eyes. "That I can't sleep and that no position is comfortable with this." Out of patience with the porcelain treatment, he takes Steve's hand and puts it on his belly. He supposes Steve deserves it for having this embarrassing conversation with him. The others, Tony is absolutely sure of this, probably volunteered him for it and claimed to have previous commitments. It's usually what happens with this sort of thing; Steve is primarily responsible for team maintenance.

Steve doesn't reply; Tony isn't even sure he was listening. An expression of awe has appeared on his face. Head tilted and half-closed eyes fixated on Tony's belly, he is completely occupied feeling the baby kick at his hand. Right now Tony dreams different things but he's fairly sure this will be future material for Alien-based nightmares. Thinking about it it's pretty nightmarish, really; there's something alive – and not just something small, no, it's big, around twenty inches long at the moment – living in his body, in his belly, and it wriggles and kicks and has hick-ups.

"It's pretty amazing, isn't it," Steve breathes.

First impulse for Tony is to shrug it off with a glib "sure" but he doesn't. He isn't too hot on all this depression talk about your feelings Tony business but he knows he's been pretty distant and overly defensive lately and he should stop it. And it is amazing, as much as it's terrifying. Tony can do pretty brilliant stuff with just his brain; this is probably the most awesome thing he has ever done with just his body, all glib joking aside.

After a couple of minutes of Steve fussing (though Steve mainly looks delighted and awed every time he feels one of the baby's kicks) Tony has too much. He pushes Steve's hand away and presses Steve back into the sofa, arranging him so he'll be more comfortable to fall asleep on. "Watch the news, they're on," he grumbles, putting his feet up on the table. Locking his fingers on his belly as a warning that Steve isn't to touch again, he closes his eyes and makes as if to doze off.

"It's three in the afternoon," Steve says weakly.

"Jarvis, find Steve some news," Tony orders tiredly. He falls asleep to the sound of British accents.

Some time later he wakes up again. Steve is watching a documentary on the last emperor of China and quietly talking to Clint. At first Tony wonders whether he's dreaming because Steve is saying "…just a couple of t-shirts, I don't need much."

"Something nice too though, in case we get spotted, you don't want another headline going "Captain America wearing another ratty t-shirt" with an article speculating where all your money goes."

"Bread for Africa," Tony mumbles, having figured out that apparently Steve is having Clint pack his bag for him. Blearily he opens his eyes and pushes himself up on Steve's chest. "It's Bread for Africa this month." Steve has a rotation schedule; every now and then he picks a couple of charities and each month, his complete salary goes to a different one. At the beginning he had tried giving Tony money for rent and food but Tony had found that ridiculous. Seriously, how could he have taken rent from Steve. He's a damn billionaire, for heaven's sake. He can afford to house and feed one Captain America, even if Steve does eat a lot what with his high metabolism.

"That's a nice one," Steve says happily, but then, he's happy with all the charities he picks (all of them carefully vetted on their legitimacy and monitored on where the donations go; everybody can see which charities Steve likes on his website as well).

"You like all charities," Clint huffs, rolling his eyes. Tony leaves them to it, waddling off for his mandatory pee break. When he comes back Steve is gone, probably to pick his own bags; Clint is in the kitchen, heating up a portion of dinner for himself. "You want some?" he offers Tony.

Tony happens to be a bit hungry but even if he weren't, he knows he'd need to eat; he hasn't had a proper lunch.

"You know you could spend the week-end at my Malibu house," he suggests once the two of them are sitting at the table.

Clint grins widely. "That's what we were planning anyway."

Rolling his eyes, Tony grumbles, "Good to know that you're perfectly okay appropriating my property," but secretly he's pleased. He'd love to go to the house himself, it has a private beach and a pool, but there's not really a point since he can't go outside anyway. He likes the tower best because here at least he can go out on the balcony on occasion. Not without making sure no focus lenses are aimed at him and none of the helicopters are too close, but still. All his other places are strictly staying inside only if he doesn't want to risk ending up with his third trimester belly in all the headlines in the world. That's the last thing Tony wants – he has experience with this sort of thing. To this day they still drag up a photo taken when he was fifteen for every longer ("longer" meaning "more than three lines") article of him.

"So, hey," Clint says some time later as they're both spooning yoghurt. "Natasha told me you asked her to be godmother."

Tony eyes Clint, not sure what to say. He's never found out one way or another the nature of their relationship; he knows they both have sex with other people (though he doesn't know how regularly, and if it's random people or only people of the same sex or something like that; he only knows that Natasha has had sex with Pepper and that Clint is involved in a flirting and maybe more thing with Coulson) and that they're deeply involved with each other, but that's about it. Clint might not know how deeply troubled Natasha truly is. "Yes."

"Good." Clint looks at him seriously. "It's going to show her that she's good with babies."

"Yeah," Tony agrees. Who knows, maybe in a couple of years there'll be more children in the tower.

Clint smiles and pats him on the back before wandering off.

About two hour after the others have left Loki returns. He just appears in the living room, wearing his formal Asgard clothes but not his armor, looking perfectly fine at first glance. Tony, who has been playing in his former bar mini-workshop (it's only for theoretical work, from formula over simulation to virtual model), saves and pauses everything. "Hey," he says cautiously.

"Tony," Loki replies, looking at him calmly. "Give me a moment to change."

"Sure."

While Loki is gone Tony waddles over to the kitchen and makes both of them a mug of peppermint tea. Loki comes back just when Tony is about to carry the mugs over into the living room. He stops Tony just as he's about to take them, turns him around and kisses him softly. "I talked to Thor and the others," he tells Tony.

Tony feels a spark of annoyance that he's been discussed again like he's some sort of problem his friends need to solve. But they might have a point, and it's not like they haven't discussed each of their other members in their absence at one point or the other.

"What happened at Asgard?" Tony asks as soon as they're sitting on the sofa. It's the most harmless question he can think of, easier than "why did you go" or "what happened this morning" or "are we fighting".

"I talked to Odin," Loki replies. He has his hands wrapped around his mug and isn't looking at Tony. "You asked me to remove the bond between us. I'm still not willing to just leave you to death, though. So I pursued the other option."

That sounds ominous. "What other option?"

Loki takes a sip of the tea. "There is a woman on Asgard, her name is Iðunn. She has a garden of apple trees. These apples are what keep us from aging. Iðunn owes me a favor, but I decided it would be better to let Odin know."

Tony raises an eyebrow. "For diplomacy?"

Loki looks at him for one long moment. "Diplomacy, yes."

That means Loki probably put it more diplomatically as well, but before Tony can ask how it went Loki adds, eyes shrewd, "Also to let them know how serious I am about this."

Heart racing, Tony licks his lips. "About the child?"

Loki rolls his eyes. "They are aware of that. No, about you, Tony." He pauses, gaze turning thoughtful. "I spoke to Thor as well. It appears there has been a miscommunication this morning because I failed to make myself clear." He smiles dryly. "That's my fault, mother even told me to."

Even if he wanted to, Tony wouldn't be able to say a word; his throat is so dry he can barely swallow. After putting the tea mug down Loki turns towards him, cups his face with his hand unnaturally warm from the tea. "Tony," he says very seriously. "I'm not just here because I feel like it at the moment or because the opportunity presented itself. I understand where you might have gained that impression, but I'm not an impulsive person under normal circumstances. I'm not with you for any reason such as an opportunity or out of fleeting attraction and certainly not because you're pregnant. Rather, it's the other way around; you're pregnant precisely because that's not why I'm with you."

Tony clears his throat but his voice is still hoarse when he says, "I thought you don't know why I'm pregnant." He carefully doesn't comment on the other part, where Loki isn't with him because he's pregnant but instead he is pregnant because Loki is with him. With being with him meaning… what exactly?

"And that's the truth, I do not. Nobody knows where pregnancies come from. But there are some common denominators that have led to some theories, and I have had much time to think about this."

By this point Tony knows not to roll his eyes and condescend that the Asgardians have all this incredible technologies and don't know where babies come from. They don't, and for good reasons; pregnancies don't just happen to women who have sex with men (as evidenced by Tony and Loki). They also happen to men with men, or women with women, and even man with woman isn't that simple because sometimes the man will be pregnant and sometimes the woman. Normally Tony would assume that they have some cases of cheating going on, but somebody should have noticed after several thousands of years of that. Loki would have, and he isn't the only smart person around on Asgard, even if listening to him it sometimes seems like it. Tony just has to accept the fact that in Asgard magic is responsible for pregnancies.

"So you think it's more than just magic having a mind of its own?" he asks. He has no opinion on whether that makes sense or not; he's still hung up on the "magic has a mind of its own" thing. It's just so random, it doesn't make any sense and it's frustrating.

Loki inclines his head. "Magic is the how, but it's not the why." He bites his lower lip. "As to the why, there are various theories, but most people agree that there has to be a certain… closeness between the would-be parents."

Ah. "Define closeness." It probably doesn't mean sex, though Tony didn't think to ask whether the would-be parents had sex to begin with. It had seemed completely obvious that they would have to him, but he should have known not to assume anything.

Frustration flickers over Loki's face. "I really don't understand how you just don't get it," he snaps. "I'm doing everything to make sure you're as immortal as can be. I wouldn't do that for someone I don't care about a lot. In fact," Loki leans in, eyes narrowed, "I have never done that for anyone before."

Tony's mouth drops open. "You haven't?" Wow. Okay. Not that he thought Loki doesn't care about him, but he definitely wouldn't have thought he's that important.

"No. There were others I would have liked to keep around, but none I would have entwined our life forces for. You do understand that that means if you get injured the bond will take from me to ensure your survival? If your injury is bad enough it will deplete me for you. That means I'm going to die." Suddenly Loki pulls back, running a hand through his hair. He looks frustrated and confused and even scared.

Feeling like his heart is skipping a beat, Tony reaches out and takes his hand, pulls it towards his chest. Loki follows the movement, sitting closer, leaning into Tony's side. Tony wraps one arm around his waist and leans their foreheads together. After a brief moment Loki pulls away and looks at him, expression lost. "I've never… I have been willing to die for someone in their stead before, Tony, but I have never been this desperate to prevent them from dying."

Tony swallows. "Please take it away," he croaks. "I couldn't live with the knowledge that I killed you."

Loki bites his lower lip. "Please don't make me do it right now, not until you've given birth. No wound you could receive would kill me. Someone would have to deal you several deadly wounds in a rapid succession for it to harm me."

"Why are you so intent on keeping it until after the birth?" Tony asks, squeezing Loki's hand.

"Bruce has informed me of the risks of a cesarean section. Your wounds will heal quickly with this and you won't die." So Loki is as scared of the c-section as Tony is. For some reason this comforts Tony, that he isn't the only one worried.

"Can't I just eat that apple now?"

"No." The corners of Lokis mouth quirk upwards. "Not unless you want the baby to not age until the apple's effects wane."

Uh, no, thanks. No matter how long that is, that's about the most horrible thing Tony can imagine; he's already had more than enough of being pregnant and the due date can't come too soon, even with how terrified he is of having to take care of a newborn.

"Tony." Pulling him out of his horrified thoughts Loki leans in, eyes narrowed. "Did you get it now or do you need me to say it?"

"No." Embarrassed, Tony ducks his head. "No." Anything but that. He tugs on Loki's hand and Loki immediately leans in for a kiss, looking as relieved as Tony feels.

Tony smiles faintly. He wants to ask for details on what happened on Asgard but he figures he needs to say something else first. "For what it's worth, I, uh. Don't want you here just because of the baby either."

Loki visibly suppresses a grin. "Good."

They stare at each other goofily for a moment before they realize what they're doing and simultaneously duck their heads, both reaching for their mugs of peppermint tea and taking sips to hide their faces.

"So," Tony says after a moment. "How did things go with Odin?" Belatedly he realizes that Loki went there to basically state his intent.

Loki thinks about it for a moment. "Better than expected," he eventually replies, but it sounds like he isn't entirely sure himself. At Tony's questioning look he elaborates slowly, "Mother… I told them of my intention to give you the apple. Odin had many questions, and without mother there we would have started fighting." He grimaces. "As usual. He still doesn't listen."

"But he let you take the apple," Tony deduces.

"He might not have, but mother got involved." Loki's face is thoughtful. "She never did, before. All she would do was try to placate. She never intervened."

"Maybe she realized that she should have," Tony suggests.

Loki tilts his head. "Perhaps." He thinks about this for a moment, deeply lost in memories, before shaking his head. "It does not matter now. Will you eat the apple?"

Tony takes a breath. "I can't say I dislike the idea of not getting older," he hedges, trying to suppress a smile. He hadn't allowed himself to think about it, before, when being immortal still meant staying bound to Loki and thus eventually completely dependant on him.

Of course Loki sees right through his false modesty. He smirks. "It will also increase your stamina."

When Tony returns the smirk it's weaker than it should be, but honestly, he doesn't feel particularly sexy right now. He feels misshapen and generally not very attractive. It's sort of ridiculous, because big people aren't necessarily unattractive; in fact, the only thing Tony finds unattractive about people no matter their size is when they're ashamed of themselves. It's the thing he dislikes most about Loki; how much Loki hates himself, how disgusted he still is that he's a Jötunn. It got Tony to read essays about internalized racism; he's always meant to give them to Loki but he hasn't yet found the right moment.

"Tony." With a frown, Loki tilts Tony's face up at the chin. He looks at him for a moment, thumb rubbing over his cheekbones. "You do remember that I was pregnant three times?"

Right. Tony doesn't quite forget it, but he forgets the implications – that Loki knows intimately what it's like.

"You don't have to let me see or touch you or anything alike, but you have to try not to feel so embarrassed."

It isn't even really that he's embarrassed about the way he looks, at least not most of the time (though he truly hates how slow and awkward and generally useless it makes him), he just doesn't feel sexy. At all. It's a new experience for him; he has generally never felt unattractive before in all his life except for a while after his time in Afghanistan, with the arc reactor relatively new in his chest and decidedly other things on his mind. All that's fairly difficult to explain, so Tony keeps it simple. "I'm not embarrassed, I just don't feel sexy. Which, yeah, I know, is almost unbelievable, but there it is." He rolls his eyes.

Loki rolls his eyes as well. "Want me to make this sexy for you?" He cups Tony's belly with both hands, a challenge clear in his eyes.

"You can try." Tony raises both eyebrows, rising to the challenge and returning it. Loki can do many sexy things, but Tony doubts he'll succeed in this.

With a smile Loki leans closer, one hand remaining on Tony's belly, the other cupping the back of Tony's neck. "Do you know how this happened?"

It earns him an incredulous look. "Yeah, guess what, I was there."

A lazy smiles curls Loki's lips upwards. "Do you remember? You were at that charity function, and you were bored and annoyed. You never told me what annoyed so much, but as soon as you saw me you pulled me into the bathroom."

Yes, Tony remembers that. He'd been pissed because that reporter Christine had stalked him the whole evening, throwing false accusations at him in an attempt to get a rise out of him. He hadn't expected to meet Loki but when he had suddenly the only thing he thought about was how hard he was going to fuck him. Loki had smiled that smile, the dangerous one that always makes shivers run down Tony's back. The one that means Loki might let Tony manhandle him, but it's just as possible he'll switch their positions and wrap a hand around Tony's neck as he comes. Tony loves that smile.

"You told me I had five minutes, then you were going to fuck me." Loki reminds him, voice low. "I used those five minutes to prepare myself right there in front of you, and after I was done I took you to your hotel room. You pushed me to the bed, put me on my knees on the floor and pressed me face down on the mattress. Do you remember what you did do then, Tony?"

Biting his lower lip, Tony closes his eyes as he remembers. "I pulled your pants down, took my cock out and fucked you hard."

The hand on the back of Tony's neck slides around, fingertips brushing over his throat, making Tony swallow. Loki leans in, lips brushing over Tony's ear shell, breath hot as he whispers, "What did I do?"

Tony licks his lips. "You told me to fuck you harder."

"But I didn't just tell you, didn't I." Loki's hand wanders down Tony's chest, circling around one nipple. "I begged you. I said "please", didn't I?"

Tony lets his hand slide down Loki's back, cupping his ass. "You didn't say it very nicely, though."

"I didn't?" Loki's tone is playful, finger still circling around Tony's nipple.

"No." Tony squeezes and pulls Loki completely into his side. Keeping his eyes closed he turns his head, brushing their lip against each other. "In fact, you threatened me."

"Oh, really?" Turning his body slightly, Loki presses his erection into Tony's side, making him draw a sharp breath. "Tell me, what did I say?"

Breath going fast both because of the memory and Loki's teasing, Tony brushes his lips over Loki's again. "That if I don't make you come within the next five minutes you're not going to let me come for the rest of the night."

"And what did you do?" Loki asks silkily.

Tony grins. "I grabbed your hips tight and came."

Loki kisses him, nipping at Tony's lower lip. "You remember what I did then?"

Finally opening his eyes, Tony meets Loki's gaze. "You took me by the tie, threw me onto the bed and tied my hands to the headboard."

Loki grins "And I didn't let you come the whole night."

Eyes zoning in on the tip of Loki's tongue as he flicks it out to wet his lips, Tony breathes, "You fucked me three times." He'd been so sore afterwards but god, it'd been so good.

"And we made this happen." Loki slides his hand over Tony's belly, but it doesn't make him feel uncomfortable the way it often does. "You know what I thought that night?"

Tony meets Loki's eyes again. "What?"

"Nobody would have dared do that to me – to order me around and defy me like you did. And you keep doing it. The first time we had sex and the first time we met both were like that. You never do what I expect you to do. When you fell asleep that night I looked at you and I knew I had you – I knew you hadn't had sex with anybody else in months. I knew I wouldn't ever give you back." Loki rubs his hand up and down Tony's belly. "I made you come so hard you passed out, and I watched you, and I came in you, and we made this."

Wide-eyed, Tony clears his throat. "That's not exactly romantic."

Loki raises an eyebrow. "We have never been romantic. Now shut up and let me suck your dick, I'm hungry for it after all this."

Despite the words Tony knows Loki would listen if Tony said no; they've always listened to "no" or "stop" (except those times when they had a safe word instead). But seriously, who would say no to that? Certainly not Tony.

It really sucks (pun not intended) how Tony can't see a thing beyond his belly. Loki slides to his knees between Tony's spread legs, pulls his pants down and sucks his half-hard dick into his mouth, and Tony can't even watch Loki lips wrap around his dick, can't see his expression while Loki's clever tongue makes him groan. But Loki lets him put a hand on the back of his head and grips is other hand tightly and pretty soon Tony is too busy gasping and moaning while Loki goes to town, head bobbing up and down, sucking hard.

Tony comes unsurprisingly fast. He hasn't come in way too long, just not feeling like even jerking off, and on top of that Loki is quite skilled. He knows exactly how to make Tony see stars, and after Tony has spent himself in Loki's mouth Loki rises, wicked grin curling his lips. When Loki opens his pants Tony makes a grasp for his cock but Loki stops him. Taking himself in hand, Loki asks him for permission with his eyes when he makes as if to push Tony's shirt up.

Swallowing, Tony nods. Orgasm has made him pliant and lethargic but his heart hasn't slowed down much yet and it pounds in his ears when he watches Loki jerk off, white teeth digging into his lower lip. Loki's half-lidded eyes are focused on Tony's face but they flicker down to his belly every now and then, where his hand is rubbing in slow circles. Abruptly Tony realizes that it makes Loki hot and, considering how it happened, Tony completely understands. Loki had been dangerous that night, like a razor blade wrapped in silk, not remotely tamed, just concealed. He'd kept Tony hard for hours, teasing him, making him scream and moan and beg, acting like a smug, arrogant prick all the while. Tony had loved every second of it.

"Come on," Tony murmurs, palming Loki's ass. "Come on me."

The heat in Loki's eyes flares up and a moment later Loki obeys, hot come striping across Tony's belly.

Breathing heavily, they stare at each other. Or, well, Loki stares at Tony; Tony tries to stare back but his eyes keep drooping. Eventually Loki smiles drily and takes his t-shirt off, wiping Tony clean with it. "You want to sleep here or in bed?"

Tony grumbles, already half asleep despite the fact that the way he's sitting isn't really comfortable for that. When Loki sits down next to him and pulls him into his side, arranging a blanket over both of them, Tony drops off like a light.

When he wakes up some time later it's fairly dark in the living room, only one lamp turned on, spreading a warm, low light. At first he thinks Loki is asleep as well but when Tony stirs and blinks awake Loki meets his gaze, green eyes clear when they focus on him. "Steve said you don't sleep well because you think too much."

Tony shrugs, not entirely awake yet. "A bit true."

They're lying on their sides, facing each other. Tony is still fully dressed while Loki is naked except for his underwear, but he doesn't seem to be cold despite the fact that the blanket is barely covering him to his waist.

"Steve also said that you're depressed."

That has Tony rolling his eyes. Of course Steve would accept his theory as fact. Tony should have protested harder. "Don't believe everything Steve says."

Loki eyes him. "Okay." It doesn't mean Loki believes him, but it also doesn't mean he believes Steve.

With a sigh Tony pushes himself upright and goes for his usual pee break. When he comes back Loki is in the kitchen, eyeing the contents of the fridge. "Salad?"

"Fruit?" Tony returns, checking out the contents of the freezer. "Oooh, pizza."

"Yes." Decisively, Loki gets Tony's fruit salad out of the fridge while Tony puts the pizza in the oven.

"So, what are we supposed to be doing?" Loki asks when they're both sitting.

Tony shrugs, concentrating on picking the banana out of the salad to eat first. He isn't much of a fan of the varying consistencies of the different fruits but he's been eating fruit salad several times a day for months now. "Wasn't my idea, I have no idea what they're expecting us to do." He leers at Loki. "Except the obvious."

Loki's grin is a bit too delighted. Maybe the lack of sex has been getting to him; thinking about it, Tony is surprised Loki never said a word about it or otherwise made him feel like he should be putting out. Tony probably wouldn't have had the patience in his place.

But really, it's not like Loki has a magical healing cock and Tony all of a sudden feels like having sex non-stop. Even if he did he wouldn't be able to; he still feels lethargic all the time. So instead they beat each other up on the xbox. There's a pretty cool Avengers beat-'em-up game; it's not new so Loki is still among the villains but there is a nifty function in the higher levels where one can make an alliance with Loki – at the risk of always being betrayed. Loki and Tony make a team with Loki playing Iron Man and Tony Black Widow. Character Loki ends up betraying them and character Iron Man tries to use is manly vibes (Iron Man is the only male character who has the function to use vibes, it never ceases to amuse Tony even while it annoys him that the game is so heterosexist and it only works on character Amora) to make him reconsider and betray Dr. Doom instead. It's hilarious. The first time they had played this game with Loki he had kept huffing and being offended. "Your cock is not that great," he had griped at Tony at one point, sending Clint into peals of laughter.

It's hours later – way past their usual bedtime – before they go to bed, and Tony even manages to get some sleep. The rest of the week-end is spent in a similar manner; basically they spend a lot of time in front of the TV. There's also a lot of dozing (Tony's main occupation right now) and even a little bit of sex. Loki treats Tony to another one of his awesome massages and they even spend some time in the swimming pool down by the gym. By the time the other Avengers come back Monday morning Tony is considerably more relaxed than he was three days ago. He barely feels a sting when they tell him the details of the mission they had together with Reeds' team – Jarvis had informed him and Loki that it was happening at the time but nobody had contacted them for Loki's help, and they would have if it had been necessary. There are no injuries except for one strained ankle; Clint is grumpy about the whole thing but Natasha is perfectly happy telling them how it happened. Apparently Clint had done a hilarious sort of pirouette out of the way of a car being thrown in his direction and his ankle hadn't thanked him for it.

"We invalids can share the sofa while the others serve us," Tony tells him. Clint is sullen about the whole thing, especially since Natasha threatens him with bodily harm if he doesn't follow the doctor's orders of staying off it for at least three days, but when he finds that the others actually bring him whatever he wants he brightens up considerably. At first, when the TV doesn't bore him enough yet, he keeps it reasonable, just having the others bring him lunch and something to drink, but sometime in the afternoon he gets terribly bored and starts to overdo it a little – or a lot. Before Natasha can kill him Tony distracts him by taking out a deck of cards and teaching him one of the games he learned in Afghanistan. Clint makes a point of being excellent in all the card games he knows so he's delighted to learn a new one. During dinner he keeps nagging the others until they agree to play the game afterwards, which of course means Tony has to teach them all the rules first.

After Clint has shown them all who's boss – except Loki, whose poker face (and cheating skills) are without match, and Tony, who is way more familiar with the game – they watch a movie. Naturally, Tony falls asleep within the first five minutes; he didn't even doze once the whole day so he considers it a great achievement.

When he wakes up he's lying half on top of Clint who has wrapped an arm around his shoulders.

"…but he does look considerably better," Steve is saying.

"Stop talkin' 'bout me," Tony mumbles.

"Shut up, we're worried about your hot ass," Clint returns, patting Tony's bottom.

"Leave my ass alone or I'll kick yours," Tony gripes. Not that he minds; his and Clint's relationship is built on flirting (though really, most of Tony's relationships involve a healthy portion of flirting) and teasing. Clint had overdone the latter for a while at the beginning of the pregnancy but they've mostly moved past that.

"You can't kick anything at the moment," Clint quips.

Someone shifts, possibly to tell Clint he's going a bit far (which he is, but whatever), but Tony is faster. "I can remote control the suit."

Clint twitches under him, making Tony frown. "You are shitting me."

"Jarvis can as well," Tony adds. Admittedly the connection isn't very stable yet if he doesn't upload Jarvis' complete personality to it, but it works; the rest is just upgrading. With enough practice and upgrades Tony will be able to use the suit remotely almost as if he were in it. Of course it'll never be the same (mostly due to the fact that it's impossible to install enough cameras to create a good field of vision, one as good as being there in person).

"Brilliant," Clint says, awed. "You're the man, Tones."

Tony smiles smugly. "I know."

"Wait, you can use the suit without being in it now?" Steve recaps.

Tony blinks his eyes open, turning his head a little. "Yeah."

"That's great, Tony," Steve says, clearly impressed. "How well does it work?"

"Hammer Tech level?" Clint giggles.

Tony frowns. "Someone kick him for me, I can't right now."

Obliging lazily, Natasha stretches her leg and pokes Clint in the ribs. It sounds harmless but even Natasha's half-hearted pokes can hurt, and it's like she has toes made of steal. Clint flinches accordingly and rubs the spot, glaring at her while grumbling under his breath.

"Well enough," Tony answers Steve's question. Not well enough for Tony to go on missions with them remotely, but it'll do in a pinch.

Steve smiles at him. "Cool."

"See, you're still awesome even with this," Clint says brightly, patting Tony's belly. The baby kicks back, making him squeak and pull his hand away as if burnt. While everybody giggles Tony finally sits up and grins at Clint.

"Can't kick your ass right now, can I? Even my unborn child can catch you unaware."

"Not fair." Clint pouts. "I'm injured and drugged, stop mobbing me."

"A giant baby is what you are." Rolling her eyes Natasha gets up and stretches. "Let's get you to bed, it's way past your bedtime."

Clint complains but Natasha shows no mercy. The others take that as their own signal and everyone goes to bed.

The next day Pepper visits Tony with an overview of types of prenatal class. A little wide-eyed at the incredible variety Tony flips through the pages, barely reading anything, before staring at her. With exaggerated exasperation she takes the tablet from him and flicks through the pages, pulling one to the top before handing the tablet back. "Prenatal yoga would be best for you, I think," she says.

Tony stares down at the page and grimaces. "Yoga?"

"Unless you'd rather have all those classes that graphically discuss natural birth?" She raises an eyebrow.

Feeling a spell of nausea at the prospect, Tony quickly shakes his head. "No, thanks. No."

With a nod she takes the tablet from him again, minimizing the page and pulling up another stack of pages. "These are all the prenatal yoga classes in the area."

Tony looks at her pleadingly. "Pepper, can we just skip all this and you just tell me which one I'll take?"

She doesn't like that. "Tony, you are responsible for yourself. You need to learn to make your own decisions."

When Tony just looks at her pleadingly she sighs. "Did you get an assistant yet?"

Crossing his arms, Tony pushes his lower lip forwards, expression turning mulish.

With another sigh Pepper gives in, pointing at the page at the top of the stack. "That's a group specialized for same-sex couples. They're high-end and professional and come highly recommended. The members all signed strict non-disclosure agreements. Loki can teleport you to the backroom. There's a new group starting on Thursday at ten. They're small and technically full but they're happy to have you with them."

Tony grins broadly. "See? You already did it all. Now what would have happened if I had actually applied myself and picked a different group?"

She rolls her eyes. "You wouldn't have, I know you."

"My point exactly." Tony aims finger guns at her, grinning widely. He wants to say, "why do I need to apply myself, that's what I have you for", but he doesn't have her, which he figures is her point.

Pepper's smile is a little melancholy so she's probably thinking the same thing. "What happened to us, Tony?"

Tony shrugs. "Things, I guess."

"Things," she echoes quietly. "I guess you're right."

For a moment they stare away from each other into the distance, lost in memories. Then a determined expression appears on her face. "Well, new things will happen now, and one of them will be that we meet up once a week."

Tony raises one eyebrow. "What, you'll give me an appointment?"

She points at him. "Exactly. From now on we'll meet here for afternoon cake every Wednesday at four, starting tomorrow. Resistance is futile."

Lifting both hands in a defensive gesture, Tony does what he has learned is best when she uses that tone; surrender quietly. "Awesome. Cake. I love it. Great invention, cake. Sometimes I wonder how some recipes came into existence – mean, beer is hella complicated to make. Seriously, who the fuck thought up the process, went through it and then thought it'd be a good idea to drink it?"

"Overripe fruit, Tony," Pepper says, packing her things and rising.

"And who thought it would be a good idea to eat that?" Tony calls after her. "I mean, it's brown and squishy and disgusting!"

"Even animals get drunk off overripe fruit," Pepper calls back. "Don't forget, tomorrow at four!"

Tony doesn't forget. It's great talking to Pepper again; both their lives have changed a lot and after they broke up and Pepper set some boundaries as to the sort of things she would do for him they had both floundered, unsure how to interact after all these changes. The more both their lives had changed, the bigger the gap between them had become. Tony hadn't realized how much he misses her until they're talking to each other again; at first it's a bit awkward but they quickly fall back into their old rhythms, bickering back and forth.

The day after that Tony and Loki are supposed to attend the prenatal class. Loki hadn't even known that they exist; he's skeptical about the whole concept, potentially finding it interesting but depending its usefulness on the execution. Tony flat out does not want to go. It's one thing for his friends to see him like this; it's quite another for strangers, NDA's notwithstanding.

In the morning, Steve takes one look at Tony and probably knows exactly what he's thinking. He clearly expected it too, because he already has his arguments prepared. Very skillfully, Steve tactically executes a mix of guilt trip, puppy dog eyes and logical reasoning combining Tony's health, his responsibilities as a parent, partner and friend and a printed out list of other women's experiences as to how helpful it was, during the pregnancy and after that he starts reading aloud when Tony gets stubborn. He also suggests a compromise; Tony and Loki can go there earlier and talk privately to the instructor. If Tony isn't comfortable Loki can take him away any time and Tony can take his emitter that disables all recording devices, including security cameras. Really, Tony has no other choice but to capitulate in the face of all that.

Which doesn't mean he's at all comfortable. He changes clothes three times even though all he can choose from are jogging pants and overly stretched t-shirts. Eventually Loki joins him, already dressed in his own work-out clothes; black jogging pants and a long-sleeved shirt. He sits on the bed and stares at Tony. "You told me once that you were embarrassed about the glow of the arc reactor," he says abruptly.

Embarrassed isn't quite the right word, but neither is ashamed, and they're probably the only two that come close. Of course there was also a healthy portion of disgust in there and some other stuff relating to PTSD. Yeah, he'd also been proud of it, fuck, he'd built it right under their noses and they hadn't known a thing, but the thing had also spent a lot of time killing him. Sue him for having a whole bundle of issues about it.

"By this point you're very proud of it. How came the change about?" Loki asks.

"Because it's awesome," Tony replies. "I mean, fuck, to this day nobody has gotten anywhere close to making something like it, and I made the big reactors publicly available. And I built the first version of it in a cave. Every time I think about it I want to blow myself."

"From what I know, nobody in a male body in this realm has ever been pregnant either," Loki points out.

"Yeah, and I get a lot of flack for it." Sometimes Tony hates people.

"When has that ever stopped you?" Loki leans in, tip of his tongue flicking out to wet Tony's lips. "You don't even laugh at those who sneer at you because idiocy is not worthy of your attention. This," he puts a hand on Tony's belly, "I know that people in this realm too think that this is something amazing. The people we'll meet today share this opinion. I know the things the people outside say about you, and I agree that you shouldn't be seen by them. But the people in this group aren't them. They're all as pregnant as you, and they all also know what it's like to be singled out for something that doesn't even concern others."

Tony has to smile. "You know, whenever you try to cheer me up half of your argument is "fuck them"."

"So do it." Loki raises an eyebrow, challenging him. Tony knows what he's doing but what the heck, Loki is right.

Rolling his eyes, Tony puts on the t-shirt he's been holding – a blue Star Trek science division one, though he has a gold and a red one as well because depending on his mood he finds they all fit – and puts his hands on his hips. "Happy?"

"Ecstatic," Loki says dryly. He cups Tony's face and kisses him. "If you at any point want me to wipe their minds and leave, just say the word."

That is definitely not Steve-sanctioned.

Tony smiles. "Okay."

Loki teleports them to a wide, bright room that has thick yoga mats spread out in four rows, two on each side. It's empty, which Tony figures is on purpose. They probably were supposed to arrive somewhere else but Tony is grateful for this opportunity to check the room out in peace.

It's supposed to be nice and calming; the colors are warm, muted oranges. There's a couple of plants in pots with stalks and few, long leaves. Tony checked out the information Pepper gave him; he knows exactly where they are. He's carrying the transmitter and his mobile (exempt to the transmitter), but he knows Loki is his best protection. The NDA's are great but they're more deterrent and punishment in one; if somebody decides to ignore it Tony will have to deal with the consequences either way.

Tony picks the mat closest to the door; the angle from the mat to the window as well as the way the light falls into the room will make it difficult to get a good picture of him from there. Then he has nothing to stall with anymore, takes a deep breath and nods at Loki.

Loki opens the door and pokes his head out. He has a brief conversation with whoever notices him and then closes it again. "We're supposed to sit, she'll be right with us."

Great. With Loki's help Tony sits down cross-legged; it's a good position that makes his belly less obvious. As much as that's possible anyway, especially since he isn't wearing a loose t-shirt right now. Loki sits down next to him, legs crossed as well, knee pressing into Tony's.

They don't have to wait a minute until the door opens and a tiny, pretty woman enters the room. She doesn't look overly curious or overly excited to be the first person not among his closest friends to see Tony Stark properly pregnant; one point in her favor.

"Hi, welcome!" she says. "I'm Anastasia. I'm glad you're here. How are you feeling?"

Loki shrugs noncommittally; he's tense, probably worried as well. "Awesome," Tony drawls dryly.

She smiles slightly. "There's no reason to be nervous, but of course me telling you that won't make you any less so. But everyone who comes here is nervous, so you're not alone in that."

That isn't very comforting. Perhaps maybe a little. "Why?" The word slips out before Tony knows it.

"Most pregnancies here were intentional and maybe even came into being with many difficulties," she explains. "But that doesn't mean they don't feel scared. I probably don't have to tell you, this is a huge step. A child is a lifelong responsibility. Even someone who believes they're ready for it, who has maybe been waiting for years gets scared of that." There is a brief pause during which she probably waits for one of them to say something, but when they don't she tilts her head. "Miss Potts said you had some questions for me."

"How can we trust that nobody here will see an opportunity to make a lot of money by taking a picture?" Loki immediately asks.

"Easy," Anastasia replies immediately, "Electronic devices aren't allowed here. This is a very exclusive course; the contract includes a silence clause. Besides, those NDA's we had to sign are deadly."

"Well, yeah." Tony rolls his eyes. That's the point of them.

Anastasia snorts and grins at him, apparently thinking the same. "There's no reason to worry," she says, but before she can continue the doorbell rings.

When Anastasia comes back a couple of minutes later she's accompanied by a woman. A pregnant one, of course. She's wide-eyed and clearly nervous but there's no surprise when she spots Tony so Anastasia clearly told her who the guy behind the NDA is.

"This is Sam, these are Tony and Loki," Anastasia introduces.

"Hi," Sam says.

"Hey," Tony replies weakly. Loki's "Hello" is calm and collected.

The doorbell calls Anastasia away again, leaving the three of them alone. A bit awkwardly, Sam takes a seat on a mat, leaving one free between them. "Have you done one of these courses before?" she asks.

"No. You?"

"Nah." She shakes her head. "I was a bit overwhelmed at the beginning, but I figured it's high-time now. I'm in my thirty-second week. Which week are you in?"

The return of Anastasia and three people thankfully prevents Tony from having to make a decision between deflecting, replying and flat-out telling her that he doesn't trust her not to make it public, NDA or no. A woman and two guys enter, introduced as Daniel, Chris and Alex. They manage to put up a front of nonchalance and talk a bit about themselves, probably because they already know everything there is to know about Tony from the press and because Sam is on her own. Daniel and Chris are a couple and because they've been wanting a child for years Alex as their best friend agreed to have it for them. They're even living together.

They're joined by two other pairs; a nice lesbian couple and a woman and her male friend, and that's all of them. Anastasia returns, thankfully interrupting the awkward small talk to hand out cups of herbal tea. What follows is a nice spiel about how beautiful pregnancy is, how exciting these times are, blah blah, nothing Tony hasn't heard or read countless times before. Then she praises the positive effects of prenatal yoga; it supposedly gives one new energy and at the same time calms one down, it prepares for the birth and brings the parents closer and blah blah advertisement blah, Tony sort of drifts off. He only tunes back in when things start to get a bit more interactive after she asks each of the pregnant people to say which problems they have primarily. By the time it's Tony's turn he's frowning; it seems sort of stupid because so far everybody has the same problems. Frequent pee breaks (very normal, Anastasia comments), constant lethargy (also normal), frequent dizziness, not being able to sleep because of being uncomfortable, worry and the baby kicking (here it turns out that one of them even carries twins, the mere thought makes Tony pale) and generally having no energy (which Tony thinks is the same as lethargy, but whatever). "I'm with the lethargy," he says. It's a good thing Steve isn't here; he might try to make him elaborate or even speak up himself, the way the gay couple did, adding problems Alex has that she didn't list. Loki would never do that to him, certainly not in front of strangers and most likely not even in front of their friends.

After that is done with Anastasia beams and says that this is exactly what the yoga will help with – well not the pee breaks but certainly the lethargy. "And some women have noticed that their babies would calm down and let them sleep if they do it shortly before going to bed," she says. "Please let me know if you notice any changes in the baby's behavior. If you don't think you can do a pose you don't have to, you can just wait until we move on to the next one. If at any point you get start feeling faint or otherwise are alarmed let me know immediately, but today we'll only do very simple poses. If you get bored, don't worry, the poses will get steadily more difficult the more practiced you get, but everything will be safe, I promise."

And then they finally get to it. Except of course not immediately, because at first there is a meditation session where they're supposed to sit with crossed legs, put their hands on their bellies, close their eyes and… breathe. For about ten minutes. Tony almost falls asleep. It gets slightly more interesting when she then has them sit with their legs stretched out in front of them, their partners sitting behind them and putting their hands on their partner's belly as well. Anastasia says some pretty things about how it increases trust and closeness because the pregnant person is leaning against their partner's chest and they're both holding the baby. Tony keeps his eyes closed because he doesn't want to see her delighted smile at the kitsch of it all. He's not particularly impressed.

But then they finally get started. They do about five poses, all of which look simple but are hella complicated with Tony's centre of gravity shifted considerably. Loki keeps a careful eye on him and once catches his eye and wriggles his fingers, indicating that he'll catch Tony with magic should he fall. After that Tony breathes a little more easily.

By the end of the session they go back to the original, cross-legged position. There's a round of sharing and caring where Anastasia asks each of them for their personal impression; Tony hates it. Loki says "Fascinating" with that smile of his that makes people wonder whether he's being genuine or whether he's about to behead them, as if the two are mutually exclusive. Tony shrugs and says "it's been educational". Sam is similarly closed-mouthed but Alex, Chris and Daniel spend five minutes expounding on how great it was, how energized and close to the baby and relaxed they feel. And they might even have a point because Tony doesn't even get overly annoyed at them; he feels a faint irritation but that's all. He's also incredibly tired, though, so when Loki finally takes him back to the tower he immediately goes to bed and sleeps.

He's not sure if he'll keep going to the sessions. If Steve or anybody else had tried to convince him to keep going he would have refused just on principle, but all they do is ask how it's been. Steve puts a hand on his shoulder and smiles proudly as if Tony has achieved something when Tony tells him it's been okay, but that's the extent of commentary he gets on the whole thing. Loki seems fairly neutral; he finds it a bit much on the "pregnancy is a beautiful time" thing but he likes the poses (though he too gets bored when they just have to hold them and breathe). Tony agrees with this assessment but it doesn't make it any easier to make a decision.

In the end he decides to go again. Humans are gregarious animals with him being no exception and it had actually made him feel better to see people as big and clumsy as him who have the same problems as him.

Things generally start going uphill. Steve doesn't nag him about the whole depression theory and he also doesn't demand again that Tony talk to somebody. Tony still can't sleep well at night but he does start being able to sleep at least a little, even if he does wake up all the time having to pee or shift or stare into the dark and breathe because the baby decides that he's been doing too well on the sleeping front and needs some excitement to shake up the night in the form of kicking. He even starts wanting to have sex again and Loki is always very happy to deliver, which makes him realize just how much it's been bothering that he hadn't felt like it. Tony likes sex, he enjoys it, and he enjoys it frequently; when he doesn't something is seriously wrong with him.

Well, whatever it was, it's passing, not just with him but with the others. Tony still falls asleep on people but his coma-like two-hour naps on whoever had the misfortune to sit next to him that moment stop. His friends still treat him carefully but they stop coddling him and treating him like he's fragile. Things are good.

Naturally, they can't stay that way.

It's five am in the morning about three weeks since the first time Tony attended the yoga class. He wakes up and can't sleep, and as usual when that happens he decides to take a little stroll. This time he even dares and going out onto the balcony. It's a pitch black night; thick clouds are obscuring the stars and moon and Tony also had had a railing built in. His landing strip is still unfenced but it's also not as easily accessible anymore. The primary function is baby proofing, of course, but the railing is made of glass and it's covered in the same film that protects all of Tony's windows, making it impossible to see in from the outside while not obscuring the view at all from the inside. On the unlikely chance that somebody just happens to be trying to take a photo of Tony at five am, they won't get anything but his chest and part of his belly, which with the loose t-shirt Tony is wearing won't do much for them. If they find him in the dark to begin with, because he's wearing black as usual. All in all, Tony figures it should be pretty safe.

He didn't account for Asgardian sorceresses who can teleport.

"Ah," Tony says when Lorelei appears between him and the door. "Long time no see. How's the sister?"

She smiles brightly. "Indeed, Man of Iron. My sister reports that it is not as enjoyable playing with the Avengers ever since you stopped attending."

"So you decided to visit me and see how I'm doing? Darling, you could have just called."

Lorelei laughs. "Still so charming! Lovely." Her hands grab Tony's shoulders and she teleports away just when the light in the living room turns on, his friends having been woken by Jarvis' silent alarm.

They land on a beach on a tropical island. It's bright daylight, blinding Tony for a moment, and his feet hurt because he wasn't wearing any footwear and the sand is hot, damn it. By the time he has adapted to both Lorelei has stepped away and is laughing crazily.

Keep calm, Tony tells himself, but fuck, it's hard. He's terrified. He never used to be this scared; not that he didn't know fear or anything but this – this is Afghanistan cave level fear, and he hasn't even been hurt yet. Part of him wants to believe it's because he got used to being in danger as Iron Man but he knows that's not it.

He was wrong all these years ago lying in a cave with his chest cracked open and nothing but a car battery between him and a slow, painful death. That wasn't the most vulnerable he could ever be. This is.

Lorelei keeps laughing, clearly absolutely delighted with herself and the situation, but Tony knows better than to attempt to flee. One, he's the opposite of quick right now and two, she isn't that stupid. If she were she never would have managed this, because Tony knows for a fact that Loki put up wards to prevent this sort of thing. Tony only hopes that he didn't share the secret with her sister yet, because if she did it's likely Amora is attacking the Avengers at right this moment as a distraction.

Thinking about that won't do him any good, though, so in an attempt to distract himself he looks around. But of course there's nothing to see but a long, beautiful white beach curved in a way that clearly indicates that this is an island, and not a big one either. The sky is a perfect, clear blue with a few white clouds to break up the monotony, and the ocean is clear and perfect, waves crashing romantically at the shore. There are some stones lying around to one side leading towards a cliff and the rest of the island as far as Tony can see is covered by a tropical forest; palm trees, exotic underbrush, that sort of thing. It's beautiful and absolutely terrifying. If she leaves him here there's a high chance he's completely done for. He's already starting to feel faint because of the hot sun. Unless he's lucky and finds a fresh water source very quickly he'll get dehydrated. And that's not even considering the fact that he really shouldn't be drinking untreated water; who knows what sort of parasites are in there.

Yeah, he's pretty fucked.

Lorelei finally seems to be calming down. "Oh, what a coup!" she crows. "To steal the mighty Loki's husband right from under his nose! They will be telling this tale for centuries to come! My fame shall exceed Amora's!"

Tony clears his throat. He could point out that, if at all, they'll be telling this tale because of what Loki is going to do to her when he finds her but she might realize he's right and decide that she might as well properly deserve it and kill Tony. "We're not married, you know," he says instead. Because clearly that's the most important issue right now.

The look she eyes him with is filled with contemptuous pity. "You are having a child together. That is a union more binding than merely being married."

So much for that. "Well, what do you plan to do with me now? And where are we?" And seriously, what if this is not Earth?

Startled by the thought Tony looks around again, but he doesn't spot anything more indicative than the first time he checked his surroundings. But if this isn't Earth that means there could be some dangerous monsters lurking around somewhere.

Lorelei flaps her hand airily. "On Midgard. He would have noticed someone taking you out of this realm, you have a tracing spell on you."

Good to know. "Shouldn't that tracing spell also tell him where I am in this realm?"

"No, I'm blocking it," she says, unconcerned.

"Okay, that's great for you and everything, but I really should get out of the sun. I don't suppose you've got an umbrella hiding under that dress of yours, or even better, a house?"

She sneers at him. "Do you think I care about your puny needs?"

That's a new one. He hasn't been called puny in quite a while. "Well, honey, you're going to have to start caring, because in case you didn't notice I'm highly pregnant over here and what do you think Loki is going to do to you if I get a heatstroke and die?" And there he is, threatening her with his boyfriend's rage. He would be annoyed that he needs Loki to protect him at any other time, but right now, well. He's highly pregnant and trapped on a tropical island with Lorelei the nutso sorceress, sister of Amora the even crazier enchantress. He'll take anything he can get to protect himself.

Eyeing him suspiciously, Lorelei crosses her arms. "You are lying."

"About what?" Tony snaps. "The heatstroke or the fact that Loki is going to do things to you so horrible they'll not even dare whisper of them in a thousand years? Look at me, woman! Do you think I'm in the position to play games?" When he sways a little on his feet – only half for show – she sneers at him, but it's flimsy. He got to her, he can see it. He has no idea what the rumors around Asgard are about Tony and Loki and their child, but if people know of the pregnancy (which they probably do) they must also know that Tony is under Loki's protection. And Odin's, but Tony isn't too clear on what exactly that entails.

"Fine," she snaps eventually. "Come."

She marches off into the direction of the cliff. Tony tries to follow her but he isn't too quick on his feet and also he's getting increasingly dizzy. When he stumbles (over nothing, he's waddling through sand that's buttery soft, it's so fine) he decides to take a short break and sits down, only half of his own will. The world is swaying around him which isn't a good thing, he's overheated which is a worse thing, his head hurts and he thinks he's going to- yep, he's throwing up. The baby isn't overly impressed with it all, kicking out in distress, and fuck, Tony is terrified.

A hand on his shoulder is all that keeps him from falling face down into the sand wet with vomit, and the next moment he's somewhere cool and dark. The sand under him is cold and Tony lies down almost of his own volition, one hand on his belly and one under his face. For a while all he does is breathe and try to calm down.

Once he's recovered a little – the world isn't whirling around him at top speed anymore, his heart slowed down somewhat and he probably isn't going to throw up a second time right now – he pushes himself upright again with some difficulty and looks around.

He's in a cave. That's brilliant. But he can see the exit so that's at least something, and out in the back he hears water, which is even better. Lorelei is nowhere to be seen; probably ran off fast and far to hide. Tony is alone.

He doesn't know how long it takes him but eventually he's mostly calmed down; his situation isn't great but he isn't truly fucked anymore. Very carefully, supporting himself on the cave wall, he rises and starts to make his way towards where he hears the water. The cave gets darker in the back but he conveniently has a light permanently attached; lifting his t-shirt he uses the arc reactor to orient himself, which is super dignified but at least practical. Carefully he makes sure there are no forks or other ways to get lost, but it seems to be one single cave instead of the entry into a network, and it's not a particularly deep one either. He water he finds is a small spring of clear, cold water, but despite his parched throat he doesn't drink it. He just washes his face and puts his feet inside, feeling himself cool down.

What to do, he wonders. He'll need distilled water, and soon. He doesn't have any supplies on him, just his t-shirt, jogging pants and boxers, and he's already glad he decided to put the jogging pants on to begin with because he doesn't always on his nightly strolls. No electronics, not even a watch. Well, there is the arc reactor, but without anything to boil the water in he can't use it to improvise, if he were willing to do that to begin with; he can't risk shocking himself right now. An electric shock can kill the baby or trigger labor, both of which will lead to his and the baby's death.

Nine hours, he reminds himself. He only has to make it for nine hours. If he isn't particularly unlucky and whatever Lorelei is doing to hide him from Loki doesn't also block the micro chip, that is.

Some time later, he doesn't know how much, the temptation of the water gets a bit too great and also, Tony starts to get too cold, of all things. So Tony makes his way back to the opening of the cave and checks out where exactly he is. Maybe he should have done that first thing but he was a little busy trying not to pass out, so sue him.

But of course he isn't lucky; all he can see is island and even more ocean. Sand, tropical forest, cliffs. No surprise civilization.

Instead, he gets a sorceress stomping towards him, expression stormy and carrying three coconuts. Angrily she throws them at Tony's feet. "There, your survival is ensured. The spell hiding you will wane over time. If you die before Loki finds you it will be your own fault."

"Wait," Tony calls out when she starts to fade away. "I can't open these."

Scowling, Lorelei points her finger at the coconut and zaps holes into them; Tony hastily crouches and makes sure they don't fall over, losing all the juice in them. When he looks up she's gone.

It doesn't take him long to take the coconuts to the cave and make holes in the sand that will keep them upright. Drinking from them turns out to be more complicated; Tony spills a lot more of the juice than he would like, but after having cleaned up at the spring and checking out the outside of the cave once more Tony very quickly gets bored. Maybe he'd be able to relax a little but, with nothing to occupy him any longer all he has to do is freak out. What if the hiding spell takes a while to wear off? Lorelei wasn't too informative on how long it would take. "Over time" could mean minutes (though if that were the case Loki would be here already), hours or even days. And what if the spell is also blocking the micro chip? Or what if the chip doesn't work for some other reason? Tony tested it extensively, going so far as to send it into space and Jarvis had always been able to find it, and Tony has tested it periodically since he implanted it to make sure it can still activate if the protocol is triggered, but something could have gone wrong since the last test seven weeks ago. Suddenly eight weekly tests don't seem sufficient anymore.

Also, he still isn't feeling well. He has a headache and his blood pressure still is too high; the nausea and dizziness haven't completely faded either. Thirst is still plaguing him but he's portioning out the coconut; after he's counted to one thousand and eight hundred he can drink some more, but not before then. He's exhausted but too wired to sleep or even just doze off; Lorelei could still reconsider and come back to put him somewhere more secure, or kill him. The chip won't quit working with his death but he knows for a fact that location spells will, and if she throws him to the sharks they'll at best find the chip in a shark belly together with half a digested piece of his hip. She might not even bother taking the child out of him first, but if she does Tony doesn't want to imagine what she'd do to it, having burnt all her bridges by killing Tony.

At least he's not in labor, he tells himself, putting a hand on his belly. The child isn't calm but it's not in distress anymore, just kicking half-heartedly. He won't make it far with the coconuts but he should manage a day.

After ten thousand and eight hundred seconds the first coconut is completely empty. It gives Tony something more to do; he can go out and look for two stones. A big one to smash the coconut open (it should be easier now that it already has a hole, right?) and a flat and/or sharp one to scrape out the coconut meat.

Finding the stones is more difficult than it seemed; while there are boulders everywhere there are surprisingly little small stones. There are some the size of footballs but Tony really shouldn't lift them. He'd thought about something fist-sized, maybe a bit bigger. Walking around in the sun doesn't do him any good either so he has to go back to the cave and cool down again. On his second try he finally manages to find a stone of roughly the perfect size; not too heavy but not too small either. He decides that that's good enough for now; maybe getting the coconut meat out of the coconut won't be all that difficult.

Maybe it isn't; Tony wouldn't know because he spends ages trying to open the coconut by holding it between his feet and smashing the stone into roughly where the hole is, to absolutely zero effect. One problem is that Tony can't hold the nut too close to his belly because he's scared of slipping and hitting himself by accident and he doesn't have all that much leverage anyway with the belly in the way, so he can't use nearly as much force as he could and wants to. He ends up slipping and hitting his feet and legs but mainly his ankles instead which is just brilliant. Eventually Tony gets angry enough that he finally manages to split the stupid coconut in half and look at that! There still was juice in it.

Tony is halfway to screaming and throwing the coconut halves into the ocean, but really he needs the stupid thing. Getting the meat out turns out to be moderately difficult. He has to eat with his fingers and sand gets into everything, gritting between his teeth when he chews, but all in all he manages and it's better than nothing.

Eventually Tony stops counting seconds because he keeps dozing off, but Loki finds him as he's contemplating opening the second coconut. He looks absolutely terrified, pale and hair a mess and the first thing he does is put a spell on Tony. Before Tony has the time to open his mouth and say something sarcastic about it – it wouldn't have been his finest moment so it's a good thing – Loki falls to his knees in front of where Tony is sitting and wraps both arms around him.

He doesn't cling because that would squish the baby but his fingers dig into Tony's skin, likely leaving bruises, but none of them cares.

"Fuck, Tony," Loki says some time later.

"I'm fine," Tony says as if he hasn't been repeating it in an endless loop from the moment Loki appeared. He's exhausted, dehydrated, hungry, nauseous, dizzy and dirty, but he's fine. Nothing happened. Lorelei got cold feet, he's okay.

Reaching out to rub at Loki's wet cheeks Tony asks, "Did the spell wear off?"

Wordlessly Loki shakes his head. "Jarvis was finally able to hone in on your chip's signal. He showed me satellite pictures of where you are and I teleported here."

Tony frowns. "How did you know I was in this cave?"

"I didn't." Loki frowns worriedly. "I had a small transponder. I called for you but you didn't reply."

Oh. Tony must have missed that.

"I'll take you home now," Loki says.

"Wait, my coconuts," Tony protests. They're his, he wants them.

A little dubiously Loki collects the two remaining coconuts, and suddenly they're back at the tower.

They appear on a bed in the part of Bruce's lab that has become something of a medical bay. The only person in the room is Bruce, but the rest of the Avengers are clearly visible beyond the unbreakable glass window to a different part of Bruce's lab. Tony waves at them while Loki lists Tony's symptoms to Bruce; they look as terrified as Loki, and about as relieved. Bruce is checking Tony's vitals and suddenly he's attached to an IV; he blinks and when he opens his eyes he's lying on his side, a number of pillows under his head and his belly and between his legs just the way he likes. Loki is sitting next to his head running his fingers through Tony's hair; as far as Tony can tell he hasn't taken his hands off Tony for one second since finding him.

When Tony wakes up the second time the migraine has faded to a dull throbbing. He feels sticky and his mouth tastes strange; he smells of coconut and sweat. Loki is lying behind him, pressed against his back because in Bruce's medical bay the beds aren't tiny and there's nobody who would tell Loki not to do that.

As soon as Tony stirs Loki wakes up as well. The arm he has wrapped around Tony's chest moves down as he slides his hand down Tony's belly. "You're okay," Loki murmurs, and Tony knows he means both Tony and the baby.

"Are you?" Tony asks. His tongue feels heavy and his voice is hoarse but he's too tired to care.

"No." Loki's voice is tight.

Of course he isn't. Tony might not be either, he can't quite tell. Physically he's okay, he's exhausted, but nothing really hurts. And, well, he has to pee.

Loki helps him off the bed, keeping his arm wrapped around him and his hand on Tony's elbow, supporting him as Tony makes his way over to the toilet. When Tony is done Loki helps him clean up a little, wiping him down with a washcloth and giving him fresh clothes. Tony doesn't feel exactly clean afterwards but at least he doesn't feel sand everywhere anymore. He's thinking he should go to his own bed now, it's bigger and more comfortable and, most importantly, not in a medical room, but he's exhausted and there's still an IV stuck in him. Maybe he should eat instead, he's thinking.

"I'll get you something," Loki says, stuffing pillows all around his body. Huh, Tony must have said that aloud. And he also must have gotten back into bed, because he's lying down. How surprising.

Right, Tony isn't that oblivious, he knows what this means. "Don't bother, I'll fall asleep before I can eat it," he mumbles, shoving the blanket off his body. When Loki pulls it back up Tony shoves it down again and glares.

"You'll get cold," Loki glares.

Tony scowls. "That's what you're there for."

Rolling his eyes, Loki gets into bed as well. "You could have just said," he grumbles, pushing himself close against Tony's back and wrapping an arm around his chest.

Tony sighs and closes his eyes. He starts to drift off but Loki's voice pulls him back, falsely calm, dangerously quiet. "Did she say anything to you or hurt you in any way?"

"Nah. As soon as she realized how epically she fucked up she turned tail and ran. Though she did make sure I had some coconuts so I wouldn't starve or die of thirst first, she even opened them for me," Tony replies. He doesn't tell Loki this so he will show mercy on Lorelei; Loki won't anyway and Tony isn't really invested in what he does to Lorelei either way. He does it so Loki won't run off as soon as Tony is feeling better. He has no idea if Loki would but he has unexpectedly teleported away on Tony before. Tony hadn't liked it.

Loki's grip on him tightens briefly. "I'll weave the strongest protection spell I can around you. I didn't before because it means I can't teleport you anymore either, but I can't- this can't happen again."

"Yeah, wasn't so great, was it," Tony mumbles, taking Loki's hand. Maybe Loki replies, Tony wouldn't know, he falls asleep again.

The next time Tony wakes up he feels mostly okay again. He's ravenous but they don't allow him to eat anything solid just yet. For about an hour Tony has to stay in bed – excepting mandatory pee breaks, of course – and drink mango juice in small sips; through all this Loki stays glued to his side. The others come visit him one after the other, they clearly set up a schedule, and while they pretend more or less skillfully that everything's fine Tony can tell that they were pretty freaked out. They all keep touching him – his legs, mostly – and unsubtly glancing at his belly. By the time Bruce finally decides that Tony can have something solid Tony is jittery from the attention, and then it's just a bowl of fruit loops he's allowed. After he's eaten them he has to wait another hour, and then Bruce finally takes the IV out of him and he's allowed to leave the med station. At first Bruce tries to restrict him to not being alone but Tony argues that he's never really alone with Jarvis around anyway, so Bruce amends that he is allowed to be alone but only if he calls for help the moment he starts to feel dizzy or off.

Loki doesn't want to leave him alone, he really doesn't, but he doesn't say a word when Tony decides to take a shower on his own. He doesn't disturb him despite the fact that Tony stays in the bathroom for two hours, just sitting on his shower chair as warm water rains down on him. But he's sitting on the bed exactly where Tony left him once Tony returns to their room.

"You okay?" Tony asks, walking over to his walk-in closet to get some clothes.

"No."

Well, that's not unexpected. Biting his lower lip, Tony steps into his jogging pants. He wants to fix it – nothing really happened, both he and the baby are fine, but that's not it, he knows. That's part of it, a big part, but just because a situation that scared you is over doesn't mean the scare is as well. Also, he has the uncomfortable suspicion Loki feels personally responsible, merely because the means by which Tony was taken were magic

Pulling the shirt over his head Tony waddles back into the bedroom, taking a seat next to Loki. They sit in silence for a moment.

"It's not your fault," Tony says eventually, well-aware of how futile that is. "She saw an opportunity and took it."

"She shouldn't have had that opportunity to begin with," Loki replies calmly.

Tony winces. "Yeah, I know, but it's mostly my fault, if anyone's. I shouldn't have gotten out onto the balcony."

"If I had erected a stronger shield to begin with, you could have done that anytime, it wouldn't have been a problem."

"But if you had done that you couldn't have teleported me, you said, right?" Tony waits until Loki confirms before telling him firmly, "I would have gone crazy if I had to stay here for the past four months. I already can't go outside, and if you couldn't even have taken me to my other places… I would have gone crazy." He already is halfway there, and for a while he'd had Loki take him all around the world to his various residences because he'd gone absolutely stir-crazy. "Look." Taking Loki's hand, Tony makes sure to look him in the eyes, willing him to accept this as the truth it is. "There is absolutely no scenario where things could have turned out better. If you had locked me in completely I would have cracked – don't argue, that's what it would have been, a prison, and believe me, that's not a mindset you want me to be in. The only one who made a mistake here was I getting out onto that balcony, and Lorelei, and both of us realized our mistakes pretty quickly. It could have gone so much worse and I've learned my lesson – though believe me when I say that I really, really hope very much that I will never need it – but everything turned out fine. I got a bit of a heatstroke, but neither me nor the baby are any worse for it."

Loki looks at him for a long moment, eyes scarily blank. "I'm still going to explain to Lorelei in detail the gravity of her mistake."

"Be my guest," Tony says. "By which I mean, I'm very much for that, because I didn't exactly enjoy myself. But we're okay. You can stop freaking out."

To Tony's absolute horror, Loki's expression crumbles a bit at that. Looping an arm around Loki's neck he quickly pulls him in, squeezing him tight. It's pretty awkward with the way they're sitting and Tony's belly so he pushes them up the bed, careful to neither strangle Loki nor let go of him. Loki is completely pliant, hands fluttering over Tony's back and belly. Only when Tony has found a position somewhat comfortable, with both of them on their sides and Loki curled around his front, does Loki start to stir, but only to fish Tony's countless pillows down from the headboard. Together they arrange them to support Tony's back and belly before settling down, Loki wrapping one arm around Tony's hips and placing his other hand on his chest. Tony starts running his fingers through Loki's silky hair, absently wondering when Loki took the time to shower and who managed to convince him to do so in the first place, because he's fairly sure that without somebody telling him to and taking up sigil at Tony's bed in his place they wouldn't have gotten Loki away from Tony with a crowbar.

"You've been waiting for something like this to happen," Tony says quietly a while later. It's a recent realization, but not one that startled him, so he must have suspected something like it for a while.

Loki gives a laugh, a broken, half-crazy thing. "I relaxed. I shouldn't have."

Ah, crap. Tony is familiar with that line of thinking. And he knows intimately that there's really absolutely nothing he can say now that will make Loki feel better.

So he says something that he needs to say instead. "I'm not defenseless. Right now I'm pretty vulnerable and I was a bit reckless, but I'm never defenseless. I'll always find a way."

Tapping his fingers against the arc reactor glowing between them, Loki nods. "Built in a cave, from scraps. You've said."

"Powered by a car battery," Tony adds. "With quite a few other obstacles in the way. I'm no damsel. I can save myself."

"Knowing that does not stop me from worrying."

"No, I know that. And I get why you're freaked out – hell, I'm still freaked out myself, and I knew I was mostly safe pretty early on." Tony licks his lips. "Look, we make a pretty awesome team. We worked together to get me out of there, your magic and my tech, and our brains weren't even primarily involved. Look. I'm a genius, and even better, I'm savvy. It's a deadly combination and pretty rare too, and guess what, you're both of that too. You said so yourself, the way I develop tech and adapt is unparalleled – and the same has been said about you and your magic. That's the two of us. Together, we cover a fuckload of territory in magic, tech, intelligence and pure… adaptability. Whatever you want to call it, we're both damn flexible, in more than one way. And that's just us. We have a team backing us all the way consisting of a number of unique people, both in their skill sets, abilities and ways of thinking. I'm not quite sure where I'm going with this, but the point stands: what we can't manage is more than impossible, considering the number of impossible things we've managed so far. If we can't do something… I'm just saying, that has to mean something. Lorelei snatching me was a mix of bad luck and me being reckless; it's certainly not on you. I was serious when I said I would have gone crazy without you teleporting me around for a change of scenery. I mean look at me now, I'm far from a hundred percent, and everyone's doing their best to just keep me at this level. Look can you stop me from talking?"

Obediently Loki puts a hand on Tony's mouth. Pushing himself up to look Tony in the eyes, Loki slowly removes his hand. "I see the point you're making."

"Really? Because I don't really know what I was trying to say, to be honest."

Loki smiles, and it's faint, but it's amused, most of the bleakness gone from his expression. "You're trying to make me feel better."

"Am I? Wow, that's seriously out of character for me, are you sure I don't have heatstroke?" When Loki's face darkens Tony winces. "Too soon?"

"By far," Loki confirms.

"I was pretty worried I'd go into labor," Tony blurts. He doesn't know why he says it; he certainly hadn't been planning to.

"You were not the only one," Loki replies, face tightening again. It probably wasn't his foremost worry, though; Loki has a pretty vivid imagination (the Asgardians all do, some of the things Tony reads about them are pretty fucked up) and Tony doesn't want to know what he all imagined might be happening to Tony. Tony going into labor was probably one of his more harmless fears.

"Yeah, well. Nothing much happened."

Loki frowns, cupping Tony's face. "I won't leave you alone now to punish Lorelei." Tony's face must be betraying him because Loki's eyes widen as he realizes that that's exactly what Tony has been fearing. "Tony." His tone is chiding. "I wouldn't put revenge over you and the child."

Tony licks his lips. "It's not like you didn't put it above all else before."

"I wasn't in my right mind." Loki glares at him. "You know that. Stop it."

Yeah, maybe he isn't being entirely fair. Tony grimaces. "I know. Sorry."

Loki sighs. "You're still tired. You should sleep." Yeah, he should, now that Loki mentions it... when Tony hesitates Loki adds, "I'll stay, if you want."

"You don't have to."

"Shut up," Loki says. He sits up and reaches for the sheet, pulling it over both of them before settling back in with Tony.

About two hours later the two of them get up and join the others for an early lunch that consists of vegetable stew. It's not really the right time of year for that sort of thing but Tony doesn't comment on it, fairly sure it's a concession to him and the fact that he should eat lightly still. Everybody is trying a little too hard to act like everything is normal; Tony is dying to know what they did while he was gone but he can't exactly watch the security tapes with them hovering around. So he settles in the living room where everybody can see him – and they seem to be feeling the need to check on him often, considering how regularly they drift in and out of the living room with at best flimsy reasons – and does some of the ever-present paperwork on his tablet while on a conference call with Pepper. She didn't take his kidnapping well either. Thankfully apart from her only S.H.I.E.L.D. know about it, and S.H.I.E.L.D. doesn't have the need to hear his voice to know he's okay.

All in all it takes about an hour before the first of them crumbles; Thor, who has so far found a reason to enter the living room three times and spent most of the rest of the time hovering in the hallway stops pretending and takes a seat next to Tony. That apparently is all the start signal the others need; within half an hour the rest of them take up permanent residence in the living room as well, Natasha on Tony's other side, Loki and Steve on the sofa in a right angle to the one Tony is sitting on, Clint and Bruce in armchairs. All of them excepting Thor and Loki have something to do with them – Clint, Natasha and Bruce are doing varying good impressions of being lost in reading material while Steve is paging through his sketchbook.

"So," Tony says, trying to hide his amusement at least a little because they did have a reason to worry, even if he isn't entirely comfortable with the resulting hovering. "Anyone up for a movie?"

"Sure, whatever you want," Steve says quickly. He must have been getting desperate for something to do; Tony knows for a fact that he doesn't sketch in company when he's in emotional turmoil.

Tony wants Firefly. They watch all episodes plus the movie.

It's three days before Tony finally gets the chance to review the security footage; not because they don't leave him alone (he'd have flipped way sooner if that were the case) but because he'll need several hours for that, it's not top priority, and his body thanks him for the stress by having him sleep more, which means Steve hovers around him even more, worried that Tony's back to "depression". But then there is an emergency of the Avengers kind, and Loki has already cast the super strong protection spell that means he can't stay behind as emergency back-up. He either has to go with them immediately or stay behind completely, and it's a bigger emergency of the Dr. Doom kind so Tony gets seriously annoyed when Loki hesitates. He hates it when they treat him like he's infinitely fragile.

It takes Tony expressing his annoyance – loudly – and promising to stay in the workshop (the most fortified place in the tower) before Loki and Steve give in. But give in they do, so Tony can, based on previous encounters with Dr. Doom, reasonably expect to have around four hours to himself.

The first thing he does is call up the security tape. He watches his encounter with Lorelei out on the balcony and each bedroom footage as the others are woken up by Jarvis. He wouldn't be able to review bedroom footage if it hadn't been a declared emergency; the emergency protocol disables all privacy protocols, but even so, nobody but Tony has access to them. The security footage of the private areas of the tower (meaning everything that is Avengers residence) are all in a closed circuit, deposited on a separate server and as well-protected as Tony's most secret projects.

Tony watches at normal speed as they all converge in the living room, horrified when they realize what just happened; it makes him uncomfortable, but his curiosity is stronger. Until Jarvis tells them of the micro chip he had developed and implanted under his skin after Afghanistan, to be activated should he ever be kidnapped again. They all know how paranoid Tony is and how much he dislikes being controlled or under surveillance; Tony takes one look at Steve's face and decides he doesn't need to see that in real time.

He mutes the sound and speeds the footage up while Jarvis gives him a summary of what was being discussed. Mostly they were freaking out and trying to keep calm, much of the time simultaneously; there's some destruction of property involved because there's really nothing they can do. And wow, Tony didn't even notice that; they must have removed all traces and replaced everything before he came upstairs. He wonders why they were so keen on making it look like Thor never threw his hammer through the glass table and like Natasha never sank one of her knives into the wall.

Through it all, Loki stays terribly still. The others yell and pace and wave their hands, but Loki just stands there, mechanically going through all possible courses of action and discussing others with Jarvis.

And then, about three hours after Tony's disappearance with no solution in sight, Thor decides that it's time to tell Odin.

"Wait, what?" Tony slows the footage down and watches the discussion live – not that there is much of one. Thor says, "I must tell father," and instead of saying something bitter such as "what would be the point" like Tony would have expected Loki just nods tightly. There are some good wishes and resigned comments from the others and then Thor is off.

Three hours after that Jarvis finally hones in on the chip's signal and Loki is off before anyone can stop him; they're going to have a talk about that. What if Tony had been surrounded by enemies? Yeah, it might have taken a couple of minutes longer and more energy, but Loki should have taken the others with him. Tony hadn't thought to think about it before because he'd been safe, but from this point of view and watching the others curse he realizes Loki's mistake.

There's nothing left to do for the others but head down to the med bay; they have some doctors on stand-by but a few rooms down, probably as a concession to Tony's intense dislike of doctors and strangers being around while he's vulnerable. Thor returns shortly after Loki and Tony do, reporting that Heimdall had relayed events to him and that Odin had sent him back, now that his interference wasn't required anymore.

Tony doesn't know what to make of that at all. He's also pissed that nobody told him that they went to Odin; he would have thought they would let him know. It's a fucking huge deal, and Loki didn't say a word. Nobody did.

He gives them a grace period of a couple of hours, not more, because nobody is severely injured apart from the usual bruises. But during dinner, he leans back in his (well, Fury's, technically) chair and decides that now is as good a time as any. "Why did nobody tell me you contacted Odin?"

They sort of pause and exchange glances.

"Uh, I don't know," Clint replies. "Nobody said anything, so I didn't either." Natasha and Bruce nod in agreement.

Steve shifts. "Well, I thought it was sort of… something Thor or Loki would mention? Because it's family business?"

With a jolt Tony realizes that Steve counts Tony in on Thor and Loki's family business. Wow. Tony had never seen it like that, and he doesn't think it applies for most stuff, but for everything related to him or the baby would necessarily involve him, that much is correct.

"We did not speak of it yet," Loki says, looking at Thor.

"Father was much displeased to hear of what had conspired," Thor tells them all, a frown marring his face. "We were very relieved when Heimdall reported that you had been found and were unharmed." He shifts, eyes flickering to Loki and back to Tony. "He and mother announced that they would visit once the child is born and accompany you to the feast."

"Feast," Tony repeats. Loki is tense next to him, face completely blank. "What feast?"

"A birth is a happy occasion greatly celebrated on Asgard," Thor informs him. "Especially a royal birth. A feast to welcome the child is customary."

"Wait, wait. A feast to welcome the child, got that. But…" Yeah, better not mention the part where Odin is acting like Loki is actually his son right now. Loki is keeping perfectly still next to him; Tony doesn't want to be the one to shatter that stillness. He has no idea how Loki will react, but suffice to say, it must be a huge fucking deal for him. "They're not going to take the baby away for that feast, right?"

Thor pauses as he figures out what Tony is really asking. "No. Both parents are guests of honor and the feast will not be held without them."

"So both of us are invited to Asgard?" Tony wants to ask about the part where mortals aren't allowed there, but if he does that the necessary extension of the question is about Loki and how he's not allowed on Asgard right now, and he doesn't want to do that in front of everyone. Loki certainly wouldn't thank him for it.

"Yes," Thor says, carefully not looking at Loki.

"What about us?" Clint asks, drawing everybody's attention away from not looking at Loki. "I mean we're practically uncles and aunt. We're family too, right?"

Thor furrows his brows. "I honestly do not know the Allfather's stance on this. I consider it unlikely he will allow you to accompany us, though," he adds apologetically.

Clint pouts and grumbles. Before he can say anything too disparaging Steve speaks up. "We'll have our own celebration anyway."

"We will?" This is the first time Tony is hearing about this.

The question earns him several 'well, duh' looks.

"And Phil will be invited," Clint announces, a stubborn glint in his eyes.

"And Pepper," Natasha adds.

Time for Tony's own 'well, duh' look. "Pepper would skin me alive if she weren't invited." Turning to Clint, he continues, "And I know what Coulson's all done for me within S.H.I.E.L.D.. Of course he can come too." Where Thor went to placate Asgard and Odin, Coulson went to bring S.H.I.E.L.D. and Fury around. The guy appears all bland and harmless but he's a force to be reckoned with and Tony knows that without him, they'd have had a lot more problems with S.H.I.E.L.D.. Yeah, there were some compromises made – Loki isn't allowed onto S.H.I.E.L.D.'s floor in the tower and Tony had had to make a scanner that would alert them to Loki's magic if he ever used it on said floor – but it could have gone much, much worse.

They spend the rest of dinner talking about their own party; nobody mentions the feast at all, but it hovers above them. Tony, who has been trying not to freak out about the birth from the moment he found out, suddenly finds himself much more worried about what will come after; of Odin coming to visit them personally, of going to Asgard.

He debates ignoring the whole thing for now but when he enters their bedroom he finds Loki standing by the window, body perfectly still as he stares across the city. At first sight it looks like his arms are crossed but to Tony it seems more like he's hugging himself. Quietly closing the door, Tony flashes back to another time when Tony saw Loki like this, unmoving like the eye of a storm.

Well, at least this time Tony isn't freaking out himself as well. Or not much, at any rate.

Unfortunately Tony doesn't have that much experience at dealing with other people's freak-outs, and Loki is a special case anyway. He doesn't respond well to the things Tony sees people do on TV to comfort others so Tony is somewhat at a loss. Sometimes he just lets Loki brood in peace, but he's never sure whether that's a good idea or not; if Loki wanted to be alone he wouldn't brood in a shared space, after all. Besides, considering that Tony has a pretty good idea what's going on with Loki right now, he would feel like a coward if he ran away now.

"Hey," Tony says awkwardly. He's been hovering at the door for way too long to make it anywhere close to smooth. "You okay?"

Loki snorts bitterly, but he doesn't flinch away when Tony touches him, lets Tony direct him towards the bed. They sit at the headboard, pillows stuffed everywhere, and Tony puts Loki's hand on Tony's belly because the baby is all up and about and if nothing else, that should distract Loki somewhat. Sometimes Tony wonders if Loki is jealous because Tony is the one carrying the child and not him, but Loki's never given him any indication to really believe that.

"I know what you're doing," Loki eventually says.

"What am I doing?"

"Trying to soothe me." Loki's voice is dry and Tony can't tell either way if it's more bitter or more amused.

Tony pulls up his shoulders. "I'm not particularly soothing. Why would you think I would try it now?"

"Because my fingers are itching to go out and commit genocide," Loki offers casually.

"Well," Tony says. "I'm not particularly soothing, but something must be working because you're still here."

Loki is silent for a long time. "When he acts like this," he eventually says, voice very quiet, "all I want to do is rip something open. He jerks me around like a puppet, and I want to show him that that's not what I am. Do you know what he said when I went there, to tell him about the apple I was getting for you? You have changed, he said. So proud of himself like he had anything to do with it – like it was not he who drove me away in the first place, like it still is not he who makes me want to do atrocious things just to wipe that self-satisfied smile off his face, because this is all me. I have spent all my life trying to bend myself to his will, to get the recognition I deserve, and if not that to at least be acknowledged as something more than a tool. And I hate it, Tony. I want to be rid of him but he will not let me go – he won't forsake me completely, and yet I am completely forsaken by him in all the ways that matter. He does not even care enough to kill me where he would have killed anybody else who committed the same crimes as I. Considering what I am, I have to wonder what it is he has planned for me – when he will offer me to the Jötunn and what I will be worth in the end. But what really, truly terrifies me is what he will do with this child – the time will come where he wants something that he can bargain with it. It won't be worth much; the child of a Jötunn and a Midgardian is not particularly valuable, but even so, if he so pleases, he will take it. Or he may kill it, one day, when the prophecies grow too loud for him, when it grows older and starts to manifest its power – and our child will be powerful of mind and magic, all of my children were, perhaps more so than even I. I fear what he will do once he remembers to be afraid, and all I want is put an end to this farce so we won't be sitting here practically like an offering. I can dream of vengeance all I want, but what will it be worth if the child has been taken?"

"Nothing," Tony croaks. "But maybe you will die while you wreck everything, and then you won't have to live with the aftermath, once everything is destroyed and all you have is ashes."

"And memories," Loki adds. "I am always left with memories to cradle, to make the pain more complete."

Tony is silent for a moment. "It might come to that," he then acknowledges. "Maybe it will. But maybe it won't. You're not the only parent of this child; there's still me, and I'm not as powerless as most Midgardians. And we're not alone; my friends will fight for our child as if it's their own – hell, they already act like it is and it hasn't even been born. There is your brother – yes, I know he's never stood up for you where Odin was concerned, but he's changed, and he did work his ass off to bring Odin around a couple of months ago. I doubt he'll fold his hands in his lap and sit by idly if Odin decides to take the child for whatever reason. I know you don't believe that, but I do. Have a little faith, Loki. I know that's rich coming from me, there's not much I believe in, but this is one of those things. We're not alone – you're not alone as you were before."

Loki doesn't reply, but he also doesn't go off to kill someone so Tony counts that as a win.

It's not much of one, though, it turns out, because the next day, Loki and Thor have a fight. Tony has no idea how it starts, he isn't there for that – all he knows is that all morning Loki ignores Thor, and then suddenly they're yelling at each other. Tony is in the kitchen when it starts; by the time he has made his way into the hall where the whole spectacle is set Clint and Bruce are in the doorway to the living room, wide-eyed.

"I want for you to stop pretending you actually care!" Loki yells at top volume.

Clint and Bruce flinch and stare imploringly at Tony. "Do something," Clint mouths over Thor replying, not much more quiet, "Pretending? Is that truly what you believe?"

"Alright!" Tony yells in the brief pause as Loki takes a breath. The two of them startle and turn to look at him, evidently not used to being interrupted. "That's enough," Tony says firmly. He sees the spark in Loki's eyes and knows if he doesn't handle this carefully it will be him and Loki that will be yelling at each other in a moment, so he has to be careful. "This yelling will accomplish nothing. We will go into the living room now and I will mediate this thing."

"This is no concern of yours, Tony," Thor growls. Loki doesn't look much happier at Tony's involvement, but Tony doesn't care.

"Yeah, you can't keep telling yourself that when it's me why Loki is here to begin with, on speaking terms with you," he snaps. Loki straightens and Thor's eyes narrow; they look a lot like the siblings they are in that moment. Once again Tony speaks before either of them can get a word in edgewise. "Not a word, from either of you. We'll do this by the book. Into the living room, both of you, march."

Maybe it's the finger he points at the living room (Clint and Bruce made use of the distraction to sneak away), maybe it's the other hand stemmed into his hip like Captain Janeway, or maybe it's the big belly, but they stare at him for a long moment before they obey wordlessly.

Waddling in after them, Tony takes a banana from the fruit bowl. Motioning for Tony and Loki to sit at each end of the sofa, he drags one of the armchairs in front of them – or rather, he stares at it and then has Thor do it for him.

Once they all sit Tony holds up the banana. "Alright, this is how it'll go down. This is the speaking banana – shut up. The first rule is, only the one who holds the banana may speak, everybody else shuts his cakehole. Well, this only applies to you two, I'm the mediator, I can speak at any time. Second rule: there are a couple of words banned for the duration of this talk. Never and always are two of them, at any time I might add words to this list, and you aren't allowed to use them. Clear so far?" He waits for both of them to nod before continuing. "Okay, good. Third rule: no yelling, no provocations, no insults. Now, you're going to hate this part, but I hear it's the only way to actually get anywhere: fourth rule, you have to say how whatever you're talking about makes you feel." He winces at the glare Loki aims at him. "On the plus side, if you both do it it should be less mortifying?"

"Only if you participate as well," Loki says, smiling widely in a way that doesn't reach his eyes.

"That sounds fair," Thor agrees. Tony can't tell if he's being cheeky or honest, the power of Thor's earnest face is insurmountable.

Well, it's not like Tony thought this would go smoothly, so he nods reluctantly. With a little luck they'll… forget.

Right.

"Okay. I'll give this banana to one of you, and that person will say one thing that bothers them – one thing. Try not to make it an accusation. Your sentences are not allowed to start with the word "you". That's another rule. Got that? Great. Loki will start." He hands the banana to Loki who looks at him for a very long moment before he moves to take it.

"I am very angry with Thor," Loki says silkily. Way to state the obvious, really.

"Right. Why?"

Loki's face says it'd be easier to list why not. Tony raises an eyebrow, Loki narrows his eyes, Tony narrows his eyes, and Loki purses his lips and starts, "He has never-"

"Ah ah ah!" Tony interrupts quickly. "No accusations, no absolutes."

Loki glares. Very carefully, he enunciates, "I find his sudden interest in my affairs is startling."

Tony sort of wants to ask him to clarify but he's walking a thin line here, so he smiles and gestures for Loki to hand the banana over to Thor, who looks really rather displeased. "Okay, Thor, remember, state a feeling."

Thor opens his mouth, closes it again. "I feel… confused."

"Okay," Tony coaxes, "Why?"

"Because Loki is acting like I don't care about him." Thor frowns.

So quickly they have arrived at the core issue. Maybe this might actually work out. "Could you elaborate a bit? On why that bothers you."

"It bothers me," Thor says forcefully, only lowering his volume minimally when Tony makes a shushing gesture, "because it's not true!"

Face thunderous, Loki plucks the banana out of Thor's hand. "Since when?" he hisses. "All of a sudden you act like you're- do not interrupt me, Tony – like you care so much about me and my affairs. What is it that has changed that you now stand before Odin and defend me when before you aided him with his punishments?"

Thor opens his mouth and closes it again, holding out his hand for the banana. "I have cared," he growls, "I have always cared. But I used to... when I was younger, I didn't dare protest the Allfather's actions. I thought he could do no wrong, that he knows best. I chose to ignore problems because I thought it would make it easier on everyone – myself included, I must admit that. It took me very long to see the error of my ways."

"You started to when you were banished here, right?" Tony supplies.

"Indeed." Thor nods. "But truly the events that transpired while I was gone and once I returned made me think a lot."

"By which you mean…?" God, no wonder they never get anywhere with how they never manage to actually be clear.

Thor looks at Loki, calm and very honest. "I was wrong. For a very long time, I was wrong. You were made to feel inferior all your life, and I never took that nor you serious. Sometimes you deserved the punishments, but it cannot be denied that the Allfather's rulings were out of proportions where you are concerned, in comparison with mine. I, along with everybody else on Asgard at one point, propagated your downfall, and not a day goes by where I do not regret all the words I so thoughtlessly spoke." Thor cups Loki's face, leans in closer. It's a very private moment and Tony has to look away; he'd leave if he knew he'd be able to do it without drawing attention to himself. "I cannot condone some of your actions, brother," Thor says. "But I understand that the fault does not completely lie with you – perhaps not even half of it in some cases. I deeply regret not standing by you in your times of need and I regret even more that I was not someone you felt you could trust with your deepest thoughts and fears – someone who deserved it. I was wrong, and I have realized this, and I'm doing the best I can to make up for my mistakes in the hope that one day you might be willing to call me brother again."

Tony puts a hand on his belly and focuses on the baby; it's moving, not enough to be distracting but it's at least something to concentrate on other than the family drama unfolding right in front of him. Nobody is going to want to eat that banana when this is all over and done with, he figures.

For the longest time nobody says a word. Tony tries to play with the baby – it's something he's read about, putting a hand flat on one's belly so the baby will kick it, but either the baby doesn't get it or it's not interested. Figures. Not even born yet and already not listening to Tony; he dreads puberty.

Somebody on the sofa shifts, gets up; Tony carefully keeps his gaze lowered. He knows that he wouldn't want anybody to look at him if he were in Loki's place.

A touch on his shoulder makes him finally look up. Thor is standing in front of him, expression sober despite reddened eyes. Loki is nowhere to be found. "Thank you," says Thor quietly. "I fear without you to intervene, it would have taken considerably longer for Loki and I to reach an understanding."

"Yeah, you really rub each other the wrong way," Tony replies.

Thor's mouth twists dryly. "Verily." Without another word he hands Tony the mangled banana and leaves.

After that Loki seems considerably more relaxed. Not that he suddenly smiles all the time or anything, he just feels like it to Tony. The problems with Odin haven't vanished and Thor and Loki aren't suddenly best brothers again but Loki clearly feels… better. Tony generally has the impression that Loki is working through a lot of things; sometimes he and Thor are to be found standing together somewhere, quietly talking about something. In unguarded moments an expression of tentative wonder appears on Loki's face, like he can't believe what's happening. It fills Tony with a strange sort of warmth, to see the two starting to rebuild – or rather, build – the sort of relationship they should have had from the beginning.

Unfortunately, with that problem slowly clearing up all that is left for Tony to focus on is the birth and Odin's impending visit. Thor and even Loki have repeatedly assured him that there is no way Odin will do anything, not for this occasion, and with even Loki saying that Tony has to believe that, but that doesn't mean he's relaxed about meeting Odin Allfather.

Also, there's the small matter of the birth to be taken care of before that. And yeah, it'll be a cesarean, by all accounts Tony will lie down, get an epidural and about half an hour later the baby will be out, and that's it. Unfortunately, there's a number of things that freak Tony out about that; for one, the part where his belly will be cut open to pull the child out. There is no reality where Tony would be okay with that sort of thing. And then there's the part where Tony will come out of there with a baby.

Sure, Tony's spent the whole pregnancy aware of the fact that there's a baby and he's spent a not inconsiderable amount of time freaking out about that, but all of a sudden he realizes how completely not ready he is. A baby. Yeah, they bought all the necessary stuff months ago, including a huge stack of diapers, but things aren't everything, Tony is painfully aware of that. What if he drops it? What if he doesn't wake up when it cries at night? What if they didn't baby proof properly and the child ends up getting to the alcohol, or to Tony's tech and tools, or to a weapons cache, or the knives in the kitchen, or-

Yeah.

A week before the date they set Loki finds Tony huddled (well, as huddled as Tony can be, what with how he can't pull his knees up to his chest to assume a proper freaking out pose) in the bathroom, trying not to hyperventilate.

"Stop it," Loki says sternly after he has made Tony explain to him what exactly his issue is. "Everything has been perfectly baby proof for weeks; you know that, we've checked several times. And should neither of us wake up when the baby cries we can have Jarvis do it for us, he can make sure we'll wake up – though I doubt that will be necessary unless in extreme cases. Thirdly, you won't drop the child. You will quickly get used to the baby and to taking care of it, you'll see. A month after the birth everything will be routine."

Right, Loki has done all this six times already; Tony doesn't know why he keeps forgetting that.

Loki has to talk Tony down a couple of times more. He shows incredible patience, Tony notes in his calmer moments, keeps reiterating things he's said before without making Tony feel patronized. Depending on the sort of crisis Tony has Loki points out that the doctors know what they're doing, they have employed the best ones in the world through a careful selection process months ago. Yes, their lives will change after the birth, but it won't be horrible. The others will be there to help them, and besides… "You already love the child," Loki at one point says earnestly, looking perfectly serious. For some reason it hits Tony right in the chest. "With that you already are a better father than your father was." That hits Tony even deeper, and not just because Loki knows exactly what Tony's problem is without Tony saying a word – without Tony even being fully aware of it himself.

Loki is right.

It's both terrifying and relieving. One the one hand it's Tony's biggest fear that he'll end up being a father like Howard, and he doesn't think the fear is baseless – not when one of his greatest problems is the fact that he won't be able to live his life as he used to, with Iron Man and marathons of science making the things in his head reality. But Loki is right with at least that, he does love the baby.

Tony thinks about that for a while after Loki brings it up. It's really strange. He's never been one to love easily; actually he can count on one hand the amount of people he knows he's truly loved in his life. Infatuation, yes, but love? No.

But the child is one of them.

"Don't tell me that's news to you," Loki murmurs against Tony's temple.

Tony shrugs awkwardly and doesn't reply.

"Tony," Loki chides. "How can you not be aware of what is completely obvious to everybody else? You changed your whole life for the child from the moment on you knew of its existence. For you to do that without once slipping up – of course you love the child. You're an inherently selfish creature, Tony, and there is nothing wrong with that, but you took care of the child from the beginning at the expense of your own desires."

"Maybe." Feeling small and ridiculous, Tony bites his lower lip.

"There is no "maybe" about it. I understand your fears but this is definitely not something I'll stand you worrying about." Loki squeezes Tony's shoulders and presses a kiss to his temple.

Well, okay then.

Five days before the birth appointment, Tony's friends start to freak out as well. They don't exactly express this to Tony, but Tony notices that especially Steve is unusually nervous. Suddenly people are back to fussing over him, and they're not exactly inconspicuous huddling around a laptop watching videos on youtube on how to change a diaper and how to diagnose a colic.

Except naturally, it doesn't come as planned. Three days before the scheduled birth they're all sitting in the kitchen, eating lunch. Tony is sort of zoning out; he feels a bit weird, sort of heavy.

"Tony?"

Blinking, Tony tries to focus back on the present. "Yeah?" Steve repeats whatever he said the first time but Tony loses track before he's formed the second syllable. "What?"

A hand on his chin turns Tony's face to Loki, who is frowning worriedly. "Tony, how do you feel?"

Tony flaps his hand listlessly. "I'm fine."

"That's not what I asked. Tony?"

It's getting really hard to focus. Tony would be worried about it but, well, he can't really focus.

"Tony?"

Oh, right, there was a question. Unfortunately Tony forgot what was asked. There are hands on his face.

"Where does it hurt?" Loki asks. Right, those are his hands.

"Doesn't hurt." Tony frowns and thinks about it, but no, it really doesn't hurt. "Feels weird."

"What does? Focus, Tony."

The small of his back feels weird, like someone is pushing their foot in. Tony puts his hand there and frowns.

Loki pushes Tony's hand away and settles his own hand in the small of Tony's back. His other hand remains on Tony's face; it feels sort of nice.

"I think you're in labor, love," Loki says. Tony hums and wonders who turned off the light.

Oh, of course, he closed his eyes. Opening them again, Tony finds that people are moving around him in a sort of panicked manner, and Loki is gone. It makes his head whirl, how fast everything suddenly is. "Whoa, calm yo tits," Tony says to nobody. "You're making me dizzy."

"Hey." Suddenly Steve is right in front of him, making him startle.

"Steve!" Tony says happily after he's adjusted his eyes – for some reason they keep going out of focus. "Hello."

"Hello," Steve replies. He sounds stressed, Tony wonders why. "Tony, can you focus?"

"What are you talking about, I'm focused, I'm completely focused, don't you know, the power of my focus is frightening, people are terrified at the thought of being at the centre of my attention- whoa what's happening?" Two pairs of hands are on his arms and pulling him up, they turn him a little and then push him down again, into a chair, Fury's chair, Tony absently notes. "Do you think Fury misses his chair?" he asks.

Nobody replies; the world is moving around him.

"Hey," Tony says and, when nobody reacts, "hey," louder. He's starting to panic; something is happening, everybody is in a hurry and he doesn't know what's going on.

Suddenly several things happen at the same time; they stop moving, Loki is suddenly right in front of him, and they're in an enclosed space. "Hey," Loki says. "Keep calm, Tony, everything is okay. Breathe."

"Don't patronize me," Tony snaps.

"I'm not patronizing you," Loki returns, voice a bit tight. "You're very out of it right now, love. You're in labor. Do you feel any pain?"

Labor? That sounds weird. Tony wasn't supposed to go into labor. Besides, isn't labor supposed to be painful? He's fairly sure of that. He means to point that out but suddenly he feels very weird, sort of nauseous, like he's falling.

Oh, he's in an elevator. That explains the small space.

"It's alright, buddy," somebody says behind him, patting him on the shoulder.

Tilting his head back, Tony spots all the others – Clint and Steve, a shock full of red hair behind Clint, Thor peeking down at him from behind Steve's shoulder.

"Heeeey," Tony says. "What's up?"

"Hey Tony," Clint says, smiling tightly. "The little one's ready to come out, it looks like."

Tony frowns. "But you aren't pregnant."

"No, but you are, Tony," Steve replies, patting Tony's shoulder.

"I know." Happily, Tony puts his hands on his belly. It feels a little strange, a little hard. Frowning, Tony looks down.

"What is it?" Loki asks, putting a hand on Tony's belly as well. Tony completely forgot he's there. "It's contractions, love," Loki answers his own question. "You're in labor."

"Am I?" Tony asks vaguely. That sounds sort of scary. "Hey!" he exclaims when Loki steps away from him, suddenly panicking. He doesn't want to be left alone now.

Catching the hand Tony reaches out for him, Loki says, "We're going to the surgery, your doctors are already preparing everything."

They're moving again, but Loki doesn't let go of his hand so Tony relaxes a bit. "Labor, huh?"

"Yes. Does anything hurt?"

"No. Just feels strange." Tony looks back down on his belly, suddenly deeply concerned. "Isn't it supposed to hurt? The Internet was pretty much in agreement about that part." He doesn't feel any pain, just a sort of pulling sensation, like someone is pulling at his skin.

"It's different for everyone, love," Loki says. They arrive in the medical bay, next to which they installed the surgery for the birth. Steve and Clint help Tony onto a stretcher, and there are doctors taking Tony's blood pressure and asking questions, most of which Loki answers.

And then Loki tries to pull Tony's shirt off.

"No!" Tony exclaims, pushing the hem down again. The room is full of people. Tony doesn't want to be naked.

Loki looks at him for a moment. They're still holding hands.

"Everybody out!" Loki suddenly bellows; Tony blinks and finds that Loki has stood and is addressing the room. The doctors protest but Loki is firm and soon the room is empty.

This time Tony doesn't protest when Loki tries to take his clothes off again; he doesn't mind when it's just Loki. He also doesn't mind the hospital gown Loki helps him into afterwards, even though it's open completely at the back, only a string tying it closed in the back of his neck. It covers his front well enough; that's all Tony needs, really. His ass is fine.

Well, not right now it's not, he's fairly sure. He hasn't checked lately but he's pretty swollen everywhere, not just the ankles. But he's sitting anyway, so nobody will get to see.

"Okay, good," Loki says once Tony is (un)dressed, distractedly folding and re-folding Tony's pants. He's nervous, Tony realizes.

"It'll be fine," Tony says, putting his hands on Loki's to still his jittery movements.

Loki looks up at him, lips quirking. "I should be the one to reassure you."

"I'm fine." Tony shrugs. He is. There is a weird pulling sensation in the small of his back and a pressure around his lower belly, but nothing actually hurts.

"Okay." Cupping Tony's face, Loki leans in to kiss him. "I'll let the doctors in again now, okay?"

Tony shrugs. "Sure."

The doctors come back in, asking questions again – Tony finds he can keep better track of them now and Loki clearly has realized this as well because he points it out to the doctors. But Tony still isn't aware a hundred percent, Loki says.

Tony pouts at him. He's so busy with that he completely misses whatever the doctor says to him.

"Tony, are you listening?" Loki asks.

Tony shrugs. "I need to pee."

The doctor says something that makes Tony sit up straight. "No bedpans!" he squeaks.

So Loki helps him into the bathroom. When they come back things suddenly happen very quickly; Tony has to drink something tasting of chalky orange and then lie down on the stretcher and then he's wheeled into the surgery, and Loki isn't there all of a sudden which makes Tony panic. The doctor tries to calm him down, touches his shoulder and uses a reassuring voice, but Tony doesn't care about what she has to say. He's not far enough gone to turn away when she puts a breathing tube into his nose but it's a close thing; he doesn't want her, he wants Loki.

Thankfully, Loki comes back quickly, now dressed in scrubs, surgical mask included. His hair is covered by a weird cap and the pale teal makes his eyes seem very grass green. Someone has taken hold of Tony's left arm, a cool feeling on the inside of his elbow and then a needle as they set an IV, but Tony doesn't care because Loki is brushing the hair out of his face and saying something as he lifts Tony's head and puts a cap over his head. Tony can't quite pay attention to his words but he likes the sound of his voice. Except then Loki starts sounding a bit worried and looks at the doctors and Tony thinks maybe something is not okay.

They're doing something around the area of his belly as well; when Tony raises his head to look down he finds there's a screen obscuring his view. Loki gently pushes his head back down and says something to him. Blinking, Tony gazes up at him, trying to make out the words.

"Come on, love," Loki says, sounding worried. "Tell me how you feel."

"You've never called me that before," Tony says wonderingly. When Loki bites his lip he feels the need to add, "I like it" to make sure Loki doesn't misunderstand him.

Loki smiles faintly and squeezes his hand, eyes flicking to the screen. "Can you tell me how you feel?"

"Good," Tony replies. "When are they going to start?"

"They already did," Loki says, glancing at the screen again.

Tony frowns. "But I don't feel anything."

"That's what the epidural is for."

"Hmm," Tony says, drifting off again. Loki's thumb keeps rubbing his forehead and his voice ebbs and flows; Tony isn't quite sure whether he talks and not talks or whether it's his attention fading in and out until Loki suddenly turns silent, sitting up very straight and staring at the screen.

"I'll be right back," he says to Tony and suddenly he vanishes behind the screen. Tony wants to protest but the next moment there is screaming and Tony is suddenly a hundred percent aware of everything that might be going on behind the screen. Unfortunately there isn't much for him to find out; he doesn't feel anything and he can't understand what Loki and the doctor talk about because the screaming is too loud.

An eternity seems to pass before Loki finally appears from behind the screen, a bundle wrapped in a sterile white hospital blanket in his arms. Loki is completely focused on it but as he steps up to Tony he looks up at him and smiles. It's a breathtaking smile that Tony has never seen on him before and that he'll never forget for as long as he lives.

Loki lowers the bundle so Tony can look at it. It looks squishy and sort of red. It also is loud. "Hey," Tony says. "No need to scream, I'm the richest man on the planet, I can give you anything you want."

Unsurprisingly, that doesn't calm the baby down, but at the sound of Tony's voice the baby twitches and starts to squirm. "Hey," Tony says again. "It's alright." Wow, this is awkward. What do people normally say to babies?

"Here," Loki says, voice very gentle as he lays the baby down on Tony's chest. It curls up there, rubbing it's tiny face against the cloth of the hospital gown, and Tony thinks it's high time to answer a very important question he's been wanting to know the answer to for seven months now.

"What is it?"

"A girl," Loki says softly, very carefully caressing the baby's head. "Keep talking. She's heard your voice for months now; she knows you."

Huh. How about that. "You're squirmy," Tony says, raising his non-IV arm to tentatively wrap it around her; he doesn't want her to roll off his chest. "Then again, I knew that already. What did I do to you that made you decide to always start a ninja routine when I'm about to fall asleep? Those are not habits I want to encourage, let me tell you." And incredibly, the more Tony talks the more she calms down. Tony can scarcely believe that it should be because of him, but what else could it be?

"That was a lot of action, wasn't it?" he murmurs, staring down at the wet, dark head on his chest. "You're a lot smaller than I would have thought. Also bigger, I wonder how that works out. Hey, look, there's daddy." Loki has sat down again in his chair and lowers his head, pressing his forehead to Tony's upside down. "You okay?"

"I'm fine," Loki says quietly. He doesn't seem like it; he seems like he's freaking out, but when Tony tilts his head up to get a better look it doesn't look bad.

"So hey," Tony says, looking down at the squirming bundle on his chest. She's really tiny. "How does it work out, you're daddy, who am I?"

Loki sends him an incredulous look. "Do you honestly not know? There's a mother and there's a father."

Uh. "I'm not a mother. Women are mothers." Yeah, he's been called a mother a couple of times over the pregnancy, but only by Asgardians, and Tony thought it was just a lost in translation thing.

Loki stills for a moment. "And what is wrong with that?" His voice is very carefully calm; Tony thinks it wouldn't be, normally. Loki reacts very sensitively towards anything he perceives as sexism, and in his opinion Midgard is full of it. Tony can't even argue that point, but really. Calling female parents "mother" and male parents "father" isn't sexist, Tony doesn't think.

"Nothing, mothers are great, I'm just… not one."

Before either of them can say anything else the baby hick-ups and starts whimpering again, distracting them both thoroughly.

"Hey," Tony says. "Hey, it's okay. We're not fighting."

"Shh," Loki hushes gently, big hand cupping her tiny head. "Nothing's wrong. Your daddy's culture is just strangely fixated on there being only two genders who are polar opposites."

"Hey," Tony protests weakly. Then he pauses. "Hey! So I'm daddy now?"

"Yes. We did talk about this before; I don't know why you forgot."

"Did we?" Tony asks weakly. He doesn't remember.

The baby has calmed down again and has even stopped squirming. She's all curled up and still now. "Is she alright?"

"Yes. She's sleeping, the birth was very strenuous," Loky explains softly. "And we talked about it a couple of months ago, with the others. It was decided that you would be daddy and I would be papa. I still find it strange that there are so many words for father and mother here, not to mention how ridiculous it is that they're gender-constrained."

"She just fell asleep?" Tony is incredulous. "Just like that?"

"They do that," Loki says, a little amused.

Tony doesn't get why that doesn't seem momentous to Loki; she just fell asleep. On Tony. Like his chest is the most comfortable place she could be in the world, like his presence is soothing, like she just trusts him to keep her safe and comfortable and feels safe and protected with him.

Loki doesn't say anything, just slowly presses a series of kisses along Tony's forehead and temple, and he lends Tony his sleeve to wipe his eyes.

The moment is broken up when the doctor comes between them, telling them that everything is fine down there, Tony has been stapled shut. She doesn't take the opportunity to voice her disagreement with their decision not to sew Tony shut or to take the uterus (for lack of better word for it) out, as she's done before every time they discussed the c-section despite how often Loki said magic would take care of both.

"Good," Loki says, reaches out and puts his hand on the top of Tony's belly, just where the screen is. Tony still can't feel anything but he can tell by the surprised exclamation from someone behind the screen that Loki is definitely working his magic. Literally.

"I want to keep the scar," Tony decides suddenly. He's never thought about it before but he suddenly doesn't want there to be no sign of the pregnancy at all left on his body. He wants the scar.

Loki glances at him. "If you reconsider, I can not remove it later."

That's fine. Tony doesn't think he will.

There's some fussing happening around him; they apparently want to take the baby away to make sure she's fine but Loki does not like that at all. He tells them how big she is and how much she weighs and won't allow anyone to take her away from Tony, which honestly is perfectly fine with Tony. There is no medical necessity, not with Loki and his magic making sure she's alright better than any Midgardian medicine could. Eventually the doctors subside and Tony is wheeled into a different room. Tony keeps a careful hold of the baby on his chest, but Loki is there as well, hovering around Tony's head.

And then, finally, they're alone. There's still a needle in Tony's arm but he knows there's only a saline solution in the IV bag now. Loki raises the head of Tony's bed and perches on the side of it. Together, they stare at the bundle on Tony's chest.

"How are you feeling?" Loki asks after a moment.

"Fine," Tony replies. He thinks about that for a moment. "I was a little out of it earlier, wasn't I?"

"Rather a lot." Loki sighs. "It's the first time I've experienced someone zoning out like that during labor, but everybody reacts differently and you were fine physically."

Tony frowns, trying to remember. "Everything went really quickly all of a sudden."

Loki huffs a laugh. "No, it didn't. It's nine in the evening."

"What?!" Tony gapes at him. "You're kidding me."

Loki shakes his head, looking down at the baby. "She's almost an hour old now."

Whoa. The time really passed quickly. Tony wouldn't have thought he'd been that out of it. "Wow. Time to start thinking of names, eh?"

"In a week," Loki says firmly. "I don't understand how you can name a child you don't even know."

They've talked about this before; from a Midgardian point of view Loki fluctuates strangely between being very progressive and very peculiar (it can't really be called traditional, at least not following any tradition Tony knows). Tony certainly hadn't expected for that to happen, but he's used to it by this point.

"So hey," he says after a moment. "Can we put her somewhere? I'm about to fall asleep and I don't want her to fall off." Not that he wants to sleep now, but he has troubles keeping his eyes open so there's probably little choice about it.

"Yes we can 'put her somewhere'," Loki huffs, reaching out to take the bundle off Tony's chest. She squirms a bit and makes a noise but when Loki puts her on his chest she settles again. Tony turns his head to stare at two of them.

He wakes up to Loki's low voice, explaining to their daughter that daddy is asleep and it's a good thing too, once he has recovered from the birth he'll be as hard to keep up as her. "Your daddy is very fast," Loki says to her.

Tony blinks his eyes open. "I hope you mean that in a positive sense," he mumbles. He's slumped down with his face pressed into Loki's side; when he pushes himself upright he grimaces. Magic all good and well, he feels pretty sore.

"Entirely positive," Loki replies, an amused twinkle in his eyes. He has their daughter in his arms, and she's been cleaned and dressed in a purple jumpsuit with a fitting, pastel purple knit hat. Loki must be responsible for that, Tony decides, going by how adamantly he'd refused giving her over to anyone else.

She still looks a bit wrinkled but much smoother now, and her eyes are open, big and dark. She still squints a bit but whenever Loki speaks she stares up at him in utter fascination.

"Do you want to put on some clothes?" Loki asks. "Your friends are hovering outside. I haven't let them see her yet but I don't think I can hold them off for much longer."

With a grimace Tony sits up properly. There is a t-shirt and jogging pants waiting at the foot of the bed; Loki reaches over hand hands both of them over to him. With one hand he helps Tony out of the hospital gown and into the fresh clothes, all the while holding their daughter safe with the other. Tony can't keep his eyes off her; she keeps staring up at Loki, completely unaware of what's going on around her.

"Did you feed her yet?" Tony asks once he's settled back in bed, a little breathless from the exertion.

"No. She hasn't yet asked for anything," Loki replies. "I would have woken you up too, if she hadn't – which I highly doubt. But she's very quiet." He arranges the blanket over Tony's legs and then unceremoniously hands their daughter over.

"Whoa!" Wide-eyed, Tony takes hold of her, suddenly nervous. She's so tiny, and now she's staring up at him, and she's warm and really very fragile.

"You're fine, look," Loki says.

She flails a little, trying to turn towards Loki's voice.

"I'm not sure she is," Tony replies nervously, but the moment he starts speaking she stops squirming and focuses on Tony, staring up at him.

"See, she knows you," Loki says, clearly proud. He sounds so happy. Tony doesn't know what makes him more breathless; Loki or the fact that their daughter knows his voice and is calmed by it.

Clearing his throat, Tony looks back down at her. She still is loosely wrapped in a blanket, and her hands are balled into tiny, tiny fists. She's so small. Tony can't believe it's possible for a human being to be so tiny. He also can't believe it's possible that she was in his belly – that she grew there.

"Is she supposed to be this silent?" Tony asks after a moment. He's whispering, he doesn't know why.

"All babies are different," Loki murmurs in his ear, chin on Tony's shoulder as he looks down on their daughter. "Some are loud, some are quiet, some move a lot, others don't. Right now everything is still very new for her; she's just two hours old. Maybe she'll always be this quiet, but maybe she's just taking in her new surroundings and getting used to being in air instead of water."

Oh, of course. Everything is probably very strange for her right now, all the sounds different, it's colder and then there's how she probably isn't used to being touched either, or to having such freedom to move. It must all be alien to her in a way Tony can't really comprehend.

A knock on the door disturbs the moment. With an annoyed noise Loki gets up and walks halfway over before turning on his heel and coming back, pressing a kiss to Tony's forehead and one to the baby's. "If you want to I'll send them away again," he offers seriously.

Tony honestly considers that, looking down at her and at Loki again. "Nah," he decides, a bit reluctantly, but sure. All of them had gone through everything right along with him – to a lesser degree, but they'd been there for him. "They can take a look at her."

With a nod Loki goes back to the door. He leaves the room and closes it after himself; he's most likely giving instructions as to how they are to behave, with "instructions" meaning "threats", knowing Loki. It doesn't take long before he returns, Steve and Thor tiptoeing in after him.

No, seriously, the two almost walk on tiptoes, very carefully and very quietly. The moment they spot Tony and the baby they both freeze with matching expressions of terror on their faces. It's sort of funny, actually.

"You can come closer, she doesn't bite," Tony says amusedly.

"Yet," Loki adds, equally entertained. It's really quite funny to see two very big, buff guys like Thor and Steve act so careful.

"Uh, hey," Steve says, inching a little closer. Thor seems to have been struck completely dumb. "How are you feeling?"

Tony shrugs. "Sore, a little tired." He frowns. "Stop hovering. Come closer, pull up a chair, both of you. Where are the others?"

"Loki said only two visitors at a time," Steve explains, directing Thor at the elbow towards one of the chairs. Thor is completely silent, staring at his niece in Tony's arms.

"Oh." Tony glances at Loki who has taken his place on the bed next to Tony again. It's actually a good idea to restrict the number of visitors; Tony hadn't thought about it before but it probably would have been overwhelming to have all of them crowd in at once.

"She's… really small," Steve says hesitantly.

"Yeah. Who would've thought, right? I looked like I'd swallowed a beach ball. I feel cheated." Tony tilts her a little so Steve can look at her closer. Etiquette is probably to hand her over so Steve can hold her for a bit, but honestly, Tony doesn't want to.

"She's… cute?" Steve offers then, looking helpless.

"She looks squished," Tony says critically, eyeing her. Yeah, she is cute, but she's also red and looks a little disgruntled.

Steve doesn't reply, looking from Tony to the baby to Loki to Thor, He looks pretty nervous, but it's nothing in comparison to Thor, who just keeps staring at the baby, eyes wide.

"Maybe you should give Natasha and Bruce the opportunity to see the baby now," Loki offers when the awkward silence threatens to stretch into eternity.

The baby hiccups and everyone stares at her. She stares up at Tony with very wide eyes and makes a baby sort of noise.

"She's probably hungry," Loki suggests. He puts his little finger at her mouth and she immediately latches on. "Yes." Satisfied, Loki pulls the finger away and leaves the bed, heading towards the small kitchen unit to prepare the formula.

The baby does not approve. She makes an unhappy noise and starts to pout epically up at Tony in a way that would pull at the most evil person's heartstrings. Her breathing starts to get faster and she makes more noise and she starts to squirm, tiny fists swaying in the air, feet kicking. Near panic at all the sudden action, Tony puts his own little finger at her mouth and immediately she stops what Tony figures was the preparation for a very loud scream and latches on just like she had with Loki.

"She really is very even-tempered," Loki offers from where he's pouring freshly boiled, sterilized water into one of the sterilized bottles.

"Is she?" Tony asks, eyeing her. It's really weird, she seems completely happy with Tony's little finger even though it's obviously not food.

"Not even Fenrir was that calm, and he was the quietest," Loki says, thoroughly shaking the bottle before adding the remaining water. "Hela was always very loud. She made very sure you knew whenever she was displeased for some reason."

Tony would make a quip about how that's where her name comes from, but for one he's sure she was there long before Christian hell got its name and secondly, this is a way too delicate topic to be joked about.

"You were loud too," Thor offers quietly.

"Was I?" Loki turns around, testing the formula's temperature on the inside of his wrist.

Thor smiles faintly, still staring at his niece but clearly lost in memories now. "Yes. I remember being confused because suddenly mother was carrying this screaming thing around with her everywhere. It took some time before you became interesting."

Loki opens his mouth and Tony can see that there's something scathing at the tip of his tongue, but then Loki swallows it. "Some infants are loud and others are, clearly, rather quiet." He offers the bottle to Tony.

Feeling unaccountably nervous, Tony takes the bottle and offers the nipple to their daughter. She happily latches on and starts to drink.

The bed dips as Loki sits back down but Tony can't look away from their baby. She's drinking eagerly and keeps staring up at Tony, barely even blinking. Tony wonders why she seems so enamored with his face. He's handsome, yeah, but that can't be it. She doesn't even look away when Loki wipes her mouth; she's a messy eater.

Once about two thirds of the formula has been emptied she turns her head away; when Tony offers her the nipple again she turns her head into the other direction, smacking her lips and looking offended.

"You seemed to like it until a moment ago, no need to complain," Tony says.

Loki takes the bottle out of his hand, puts it on the nightstand and spreads a towel over Tony's shoulder. It's a good thing they practiced everything before, Tony thinks; otherwise he'd probably be in over his head not knowing what to do. This way, the only thing he's nervous about is supporting her head and not dropping her when he turns her around and puts her to his shoulder, gently patting her on the back to encourage her to burp. After she's done she seems to fall instantly asleep, head leaning against Tony's neck. Tony cups her head and marvels all over again at how small she is. While he does that he suddenly realizes that Steve and Thor are watching, completely entranced.

He sighs. "I suppose you can hold her for a bit now."

It's comical how both their eyes widen simultaneously.

"Uh, I think that's okay, you can keep her," Steve says hastily, Thor nodding along.

"No way. You're uncle and godfather, you're going to hold her," Tony says firmly. Who do they think they are? He offers them the opportunity to hold his precious baby even though he doesn't really want to, and they act like shrinking violets. No can do. "Steve, c'mere."

Steve shares a wide-eyed, half-panicked look with Thor, but he gets up and obediently sits where Tony pats the mattress. "What do I do?" he asks, voice high.

"Support her head," Loki replies dryly.

"And stop panicking, we practiced all this with that baby doll, and nobody broke its neck." And what a fun afternoon that had been. Carefully, Tony hands her over to Steve. She doesn't even stir.

In Steve arms she looks even tinier. Part of Tony wants to take her back immediately but the expression of terrified wonder on Steve's face stops him. Besides, Steve is the godfather, and eventually Tony is going to need him to babysit. He'd rather she gets used to him from the beginning.

"May I… hold her as well?" Thor eventually asks, very tentative.

Tony opens his mouth to say "sure" but in a split second he realizes that he's not the only parent here, and there are still a lot of issues between Thor and Loki, some of which involve Loki's children. So he keeps silent, just leans his shoulder a little more into Loki's to signal that whatever Loki decides, Tony is with him.

"Yes," Loki says eventually, after a long pause. He and Thor exchange a long look, things passing between them Tony can only guess at.

"Uh, I don't know how…" Steve says, too nervous to realize that this is a bit of a delicate moment.

"I have held infants before," Thor assures him, and when he makes to take his niece from Steve his grip is sure.

"I haven't," Steve informs them weakly. "This was possibly the most terrifying thing I have ever done."

"Wuss," Tony teases at that, but gently, because he can relate. "You did fine."

"I don't think I took one breath while I had her." Looking exhausted, Steve moves off the bed and slumps in his chair.

"She is enchanting," Thor comments quietly, staring down at the sleeping baby in his arms.

"Yeah," Steve agrees softly.

Tony licks his lips and has to clear his throat. He doesn't know why it touches him so that they're so enamored with his and Loki's daughter; it's probably hormones.

Squeezes his shoulder, Loki says quietly, "I think we would like to have her back now."

Immediately Thor hands her back to Tony. Loki seems satisfied with that and makes no movement to take her.

"Should we let Bruce and Natasha in now or would you like to have a moment?" Steve asks after a moment.

Tony glances at Loki, but Loki is busy plucking her hat into order, clearly leaving the decision to Tony.

"Yeah, sure." Tony shrugs. Why not? Now is as good a time as any. She's sleeping and Tony feels a little tired as well, better let them come in now before he falls asleep and they'll have to wait until morning. Tony is fairly sure that none of them would be particularly happy about that.

Bruce and Natasha take the whole thing more elegantly than Steve and Thor had; they don't stare and when they hold her they don't act like she's going to turn into a man-eating plant any moment. But that doesn't mean everything is peachy-keen; Bruce looks vaguely haunted and Tony sees another conversation coming where he has to talk Bruce down from trying to move out for the good of the baby. It's a shame; he had thought they'd gotten over that already. Yes, the danger of the Hulk is not to be underestimated, but he had always been careful around children, doing his best to keep them out of danger if he encountered them in battle, and Tony doesn't doubt that the same will hold true for this one. The Hulk hasn't been the out-of-control rage monster Bruce still sometimes sees him as in a while; not completely.

And of course, Natasha isn't without issues either. She turns very quiet as soon as the sleeping baby is settled in her arms and Tony can't decipher her expression at all. He doesn't need to, though, because Natasha starts crying completely silently. Nobody asks her to hand the baby over so she ends up holding her for nearly half an hour, Bruce's arm around her back for comfort. Probably mostly for distraction, Bruce and Loki discuss why Tony zoned out during labor; Loki says he's been there during a number of births and heard of even more, and he's heard of people becoming scatterbrained, slow or even sleepy but nothing as extreme as Tony's case. Bruce had the time to do some specific search on the internet and found out that while it might be unusual, it's not that uncommon; he's even read of cases with women having out-of-body experiences. This stirs a discussion about the different experiences during labor they have heard of (or, in Loki's case, experienced). Within five minutes of that Tony is very, very glad they didn't do this in front of him before the birth; he would have completely freaked out. Clearly he got off very, very easily, with little to no pain and only some confusion.

Eventually, Natasha silently hands the baby over to Tony and leaves. Bruce sends them both a glance and follows her, incidentally leaving the door slightly ajar.

"Well," Loki starts, but he doesn't get any further because there are footsteps approaching outside. Tony knows those heels very well.

"Tony?" Pepper knocks very carefully on the door, voice lowered to nearly a whisper. "Can I come in?"

"Sure, everybody is decent." Tony looks down at his daughter who is blinking a little, clearly only slightly awake.

She yawns.

"Oh my god," Pepper says very, very quietly. "That is adorable."

Both eyebrows raised, Tony looks up at her. "I thought you don't like babies."

"It's not that I don't like them," Pepper says carefully, "I'm just very aware of how… time-consuming they are. If it's not my time that's going to be consumed I'm perfectly fine with them." Her eyes soften as she steps closer, staring at the sleepy baby in Tony's arms. "Though she really is very adorable."

Tony can't do anything but agree. "Yeah."

With a smile Pepper sits down gracefully at the foot of Tony's bed. "How do you feel?"

"Tired and sore," Tony says once more. Maybe he should write a memo so people stop asking him that question. "Do you want to hold her?"

Pepper's eyes widen. "Uh, maybe later. Thanks."

Tony nods and doesn't make her, like he had with Steve; the situation is entirely different. Pepper doesn't refuse out of fear that she'll hurt the baby but because she has to get used to the idea first. She'd always liked children best when they were far away from her.

She stays for five more minutes, eyeing the baby and exchanging small talk before she makes her leave; it's late and it's a weekday, she needs her sleep.

Once she's gone Tony eyes the baby in his arms. He's tired enough to sleep again but he sort of doesn't want to let her go; she's so trusting and content in his arms. Also, she takes hold of his index finger when he touches her tiny fingers with it and refuses to let go, so really, how can he give her away like this? Except maybe to Loki, but Loki doesn't make any noises about wanting to have her, just stays pressed to Tony's side and looking down at her over Tony's shoulder, so Tony keeps her for now.

He's distracted from having to make a decision either way – and he'll have to, his eyes are starting to droop – by Clint.

"Hey, sorry, oh my god it's tiny," Clint says.

"Thank god, or I would have been even bigger myself," Tony returns.

Clint, knowing no boundaries sometimes, climbs onto the bed and creeps really close to get a proper look at her, knees on both sides of Tony's legs, never mind the suggestive position. "Does she have a name yet?"

"In a week," Loki replies, sounding mostly out of patience with the question.

"Soon enough," is Clint's opinion. "But really, well done, she looks all finished and everything." He reaches out to touch her hand that's still wrapped around Tony's finger, looking entranced.

Tony snorts. "Thanks."

"So I guess sleep is for the weak from now on, eh?"

"You know everything is sound proof." Tony rolls his eyes. Really. "Do you want to hold her?"

Clint's eyes are wide when he looks up to Tony; he's clearly nervous about the whole idea. "You sure you wanna give me something breakable?"

"Yeah." Carefully, Tony holds her out to Clint who takes her just as carefully, sitting down on Tony's shins. She isn't particularly happy with having to let go of Tony's finger and frowns, but she's distracted when Clint says softly, "So, hey, little one. I'm Clint, you've probably heard a lot of me."

"She's heard your whining, certainly," Tony comments. At the sound of his voice she immediately turns his head towards him. For some reason, that pleases Tony – not because he doesn't want her looking at Clint, he just doesn't want her not looking at him. That's probably not a sign of awesome parenthood but Tony decides that it's fine, he just gave birth, sort of. He's allowed to be irrational.

"I don't whine, I complain with dignity about valid issues," Clint says haughtily.

"But of course," Loki says. "Slipping on bananas at Mario Kart is a very valid issue and we're all grateful you keep it relevant."

Clint pouts and makes as if to say something, but the baby in his arms sniffles and he freezes. They all simultaneously look at her with wide eyes and find that she's pouting again like somebody shattered her heart in the most cruel and cold way, and she's squirming. "Uh," Clint makes, clearly panicking. "Take her back? I didn't do anything!"

Loki takes her back and settles her on Tony's chest again. "She's just not familiar with you, and she's tired. Tired babies are fussy."

"Okay." Clint eyes her doubtfully. Then his face turns sober. "Did she cry with Nat?"

"No," Tony negates, "she just slept. She was perfectly fine. Is Natasha alright?"

"Yeah." Clint grimaces. "She will be, anyway. I better get back to her though, Pepper is with her now but..." He shrugs, smoothly sliding off the bed and leaving.

Loki follows him and turns the lock to the door. "Time for sleep," he decides firmly.

Yeah, probably a good idea, only Tony still sort of doesn't want to let her go. He doesn't protest when Loki takes her, but he does feel sort of, well, abandoned when Loki takes her to the changing unit and changes her diapers. And then Loki lowers the lights and puts her in the cradle instead of bringing her back to him, which makes Tony even more unhappy.

Loki clearly sees something in his face when he turns to him, because he smiles ruefully. "I want to keep her with me as well, but we can't let her sleep with us."

"Why not?" Tony asks, keeping his voice low as well. He's being perfectly reasonable, he thinks. She's been with him for nine months; it's natural for him to have separation issues. Or if it isn't, it should be.

"It will cause her unnecessary anxiety later, because we can't let her sleep with us always. She won't understand why we let her sometimes and at other times not and will feel like she's being abandoned, or punished," Loki explains reasonably while taking off all his clothes except for his boxer shorts.

"So you're saying, better not let her get used to it in the first place," Tony concludes, watching him with interest. He doesn't feel much of a spark, sex is pretty low on his priority list right now, but that doesn't change the fact that Loki is pretty gorgeous to look at, really.

"Exactly." After lowering the head of the bed with a button Loki lifts the blanket and climbs back in. "We should never let her sleep with us, period. Cuddling is okay, but if she's sick or scared we should sleep with her instead."

Yeah, Tony's read that in one of the parenthood books he's been not-so-secretly reading. She's supposed to feel safe in her own bed. Tony just wouldn't have thought that would start this early, but really, it makes sense to do it from the beginning.

He sighs, then blinks when Loki leans over him. The light isn't low enough not to make out his features but Tony can't quite read the expression in his eyes.

Loki doesn't say anything, just cups Tony's face, rubs his thumb over his cheekbone. He keeps staring at him; it makes heat rise in Tony's cheeks and he really hopes the light is too low for Loki to see.

"What is it?" Tony eventually asks when he can't bear the silence any longer.

Loki shakes his head, leans in and kisses Tony on the lips. That Tony knows how to react to. He tilts his face up and returns the kiss, slides one hand into Loki's hair to pull him closer. It stays slow, lips sliding against each other gently, nothing more. Certainly it shouldn't be this exciting, shouldn't make Tony's heart race so, but it nevertheless does. There's nothing erotic about it but Tony is left breathless anyway when Loki pulls away.

Still not saying a word, Loki brushes the hair out of Tony's forehead and then settles in, arm settling around Tony's chest and head coming to rest on his shoulder. Tony turns his head to kiss the top of Loki's head before he sighs and lets himself drift off.

Not for long. It feels like barely five minutes before he's woken up again by the baby; she isn't outright crying when Tony wakes up but she's sobbing and squawking and it seems to Tony like it won't be long before she starts screaming seriously. Instinctively Tony pushes himself up only to wince and groan because yeah, he's properly sore. It's not real pain, more like a really bad muscle ache, but that's hindering enough already.

A hand on his shoulder pushes him back down. "I'll bring her to you," Loki says, rising and taking the baby out of the crib, hushing and murmuring gently. She immediately stops sobbing but when Loki brings her over, telling her that daddy will take care of her, Tony can see that she's still pouting the epic why-would-you-do-this-to-me pout. It's an instant guilt-trip, seriously.

"Hey," Tony croons. "Are you hungry? This is going to get tiring soon, I can tell that already. Right now you still have the newbie bonus going for you, I find pretty much anything you do delightful, but to remain in my high-esteem you better start learning to sleep through the night as soon as possible."

"Don't say things like that, Tony," Loki chides from the kitchen unit, where he's preparing the formula. "You'll love her no matter what she does."

Tony wants to make a joke about genocide but then he remembers that Loki's sorta been there, attempted that, so that's probably not a good idea. Also, he's starting to get that Loki doesn't have a sense of humor where the baby is concerned.

"Of course I will," he huffs. "And you know that, don't you, darling?" He runs the tip of his index finger from the top of her forehead down to the tip of her button nose. She still looks pouty, hands balled into fists, eyes wet. "I see how it is," Tony comments. "Right now you're not so sure, right? And you're right, starvation is not a sign of love, but your papa is doing the best he can. It doesn't go any quicker than this." Though maybe Tony could make it so – or at least make it less annoying, if he lets DUM-E do it… but DUM-E's a little over-enthusiastic generally, he'd probably use way too much formula powder. Tony still isn't sure if that's good intention overdone or pure mischief. Damn unpredictable, self-developing personality matrix.

"You're dramatic," Loki says, clearly amused as he climbs back into bed. He makes as if to hand the bottle over to Tony but Tony decides it's Loki's turn to feed her now.

"Nah, no can do, I already fed her once." Carefully, still unused to the fact that he's holding a living, breakable thing, Tony hands her over to Loki.

Loki is clearly happy to take her, face softening. She squirms a little when she's handed over but settles down when Loki tells her that it's alright and gives her the bottle.

Tony watches as Loki relaxes into the pillows, feeding their daughter. He never thought he would have something like this – an actual family. He's just not the type, isn't warm-hearted, has too many ingrained behavioral patterns that don't mesh well with living with other people. But gradually, that's exactly what he'd gotten – first Bruce, then Steve, then Thor, Natasha and Clint. Loki had been a part of that too, in a way, but not really until he'd more or less officially moved in because of the pregnancy. Tony would never have expected, even just a few months ago, that this would work out.

It scares him, that it seems to; good things just don't last in his experience. But right now it's very hard to remember that fear, with his daughter's tiny feet wriggling whenever he touches them. "She drinks like she's starving," he notes, faintly worried. Should they maybe have gotten up earlier? Nobody had explicitly told Jarvis to wake them up so maybe he hadn't. Though that seems fairly unlikely, Tony had programmed Jarvis to learn.

"That's normal," Loki replies. He glances at Tony, eyeing him. "She's perfectly fine."

Tony frowns. "I guess I'm just worried because she's so quiet. I know you said every baby is different and that makes sense, but she's really very quiet, isn't she?"

"She is indeed." Loki's expression is soft as he looks down at her. "But there's no need to worry. We know she can be loud, she certainly was when she was born, so if something is seriously wrong she'll let us know."

Yeah, that makes sense.

With a sigh, Tony leans into Loki's shoulder, half to be able to better look at her and half because he's getting very tired again now that the initial adrenaline is wearing off. He's getting a glimpse at how the next couple of months are going to be like, and right now he still finds it new and exciting but it's probably going to get old soon, having to get up every couple of hours.

Then again, it doesn't take that long until she's full. She burps easily too, which Loki informs him is not always going to be that effortless, and then Loki puts her back into her crib. Tony has curled up on his side and holds the blanket up for him invitingly. Loki slides into bed and pushes his back close against Tony's chest; Tony missed sleeping like that, his arm wrapped around Loki's waist and his hair tickling Tony's face.

The baby wakes them up four more times that night, roughly every two hours. It's exhausting, especially since Tony isn't in top form to begin with, but at least he's somewhat used to the frequent interruptions to his sleep because of the regular pee breaks before. And fortunately he also doesn't have to get up; Loki takes care of everything, getting the baby and preparing the formula. Tony doesn't feel even a little bad because Loki doesn't complain, doesn't even sigh with annoyance. Besides, Tony still feels pretty sore, even worse than when he first woke up now. It's not outright pain but it's anything but pleasant.

The next morning – after breakfast in bed that Clint brings them – Tony has a meeting with the doctor; she examines him and discusses the birth with him. She also wants to do an MRI just to be safe but Tony doesn't want that. And Loki refuses to have a stranger touch their baby no matter their qualifications, so the whole check-up is cut short. The doctor clearly isn't happy about it but Tony doesn't give a fuck. With Loki's history Tony can't blame him at all.

When they leave the examination room Steve and Bruce are waiting for them, meaning Tony has to go through the whole process again because Bruce doesn't trust other doctors (not that Tony can blame him for that and god, everyone in this tower is just chock-full of issues aren't they?), especially not with Tony. And Loki even lets Bruce examine their daughter, though he draws the line at blood tests. Tony has the suspicion Bruce has been brushing up on his pediatrics because he seems to know what he's doing; it's exactly what Tony would have done, had their positions been reversed.

"And, everything peachy?" Tony asks when Bruce is done. He's curled up on the bed and doesn't care, because his middle hurts from all the poking and prodding and the walking and standing, and Steve is sitting next to his head and is as if absently carding his fingers through Tony's hair. Nobody used to touch him like that before the pregnancy; at times it had pissed Tony off when they had started it, but it's really kinda nice actually and he has to admit he likes it.

"Of course it is," Bruce answers his question. "I don't know why I bother checking anymore."

"Because you're a paranoid perfectionist with trust issues?" Tony offers.

Bruce laughs. "Point taken. Now, get in the chair, we'll take you upstairs." He points towards Fury's office chair that has been forlornly waiting in a corner. He even gets it for Tony and puts it right in front of the bed so he won't have to walk the two meters over to it.

"Do you think Fury misses his chair?" Tony wonders while getting into it, pointedly ignoring Steve's offered hand. He's in pain, not an invalid.

"Coulson got him a new one, but Clint claims it's less comfortable, though it's supposedly more ergonomic and good for his back so he can't complain," Steve relays. Tony takes that as a yes.

Steve is the one who pushes Tony down the hall towards the elevator, with Bruce behind them, asking Loki questions about how magic works. Loki seems faintly amused by the whole thing; he's gone through all of it with Tony before. It had been nothing but frustrating because it turned out that no, magic actually isn't just very, very advanced science. It's actually magic. Tony hadn't particularly liked that.

They settle in the living room with the others. Tony is fairly tired and not up to much so they play simple board games for a bit – before the Avengers, Tony had never in all his life played board games – while holding the baby one after the other. She seems happy with Natasha and Thor, but she starts looking unhappy when Clint holds her, tiny hands balled into angry fists and a frown on her face as she kicks her legs. Clint jokes about not having a calming effect on babies but when he hands her over to Bruce she gets even more unhappy, at which point they all collectively decide that she misses her parents. The point is proven when Loki takes her and she's a happy baby again within the minute, looking around and head turning whenever someone speaks. And yeah, their round is a bit calmer and there are no raised voices, but apart from that it's a day like any other with the Avengers.

Until it's time to feed baby girl (Tony decrees that that shall be what she's called until the day Loki deems it acceptable to start looking for a real name). It's Tony's turn and he finds himself under the more or less surreptitious scrutiny of his team mates.

"What?" he asks, defensive and not sure why.

Natasha shakes her head. "It's just not a picture we ever thought we'd see; you feeding a baby, I mean."

Both of Tony's eyebrows fly up. "What, and the seven months weren't enough time to prepare?"

With a headshake, she goes back to the game. "Not the point and you know it. Bruce, it's your turn."

Tony scowls and the only reason he doesn't wish for her to lose is that she distracts the others from staring at him.

He has a hard time putting her down that first day. He does eventually after lunch because he sees that she probably needs some alone time after she's made a round in the other direction, and then he takes a nap because he feels a little weird, sort of empty without her, and that makes him feel ridiculous. Besides, he's still knackered, so it's not like it's a flimsy excuse to hide.

Loki wakes him up some indefinite time later, crawling into bed with him and nuzzling his face. "Bruce is taking care of the baby," Loki informs him as Tony stirs. "You're feeling better, are you not?" he asks when Tony stretches his arms over his head and blinks up at him.

Tony hums tiredly. He is; his middle still feels bruised and sore but it's getting gradually better. He doesn't feel like talking about himself, though, so he wraps his hand around Loki's neck and pulls him into a deep kiss that Loki eagerly returns.

With Loki hovering above him like that, all Tony can suddenly think about is how long it's been since they last had sex, and how it's been much, much longer since they had sex that wasn't sort of awkward because of the belly. And yeah, Tony feels far from sexy right now – he's squishy in places he's never been squishy before – and he's also mildly in pain, but god, all he wants all of a sudden is wild, unrestrained sex. A whole night of it, taking turns, catnapping, snacking, and a lot of fucking.

Unfortunately he's far from up to that right now, so he makes a mental note to pencil that in sometime in two weeks, perhaps appointing Natasha and Steve babysitters for the night. But that they can't have lots and lots of rough sex right now doesn't mean they can't at least have some orgasms.

He tilts his chin up and pulls Loki closer, over him. Loki hums approvingly and climbs on top of him, straddling Tony's hips and supporting himself on both sides of Tony's head. Going by how eager he is, he clearly missed it as well. Very quickly, they divest each other of their clothes – though it's Loki doing most of the work, all Tony manages to do is pull Loki's shirt off him. It's not exactly easy, he's far from perfectly mobile, but he doesn't have to move much anyway. Loki seems perfectly happy straddling Tony and doing most of the work. It's far from smooth; every time Tony instinctively tenses his abdominal muscles and thrusts up pain trips him up, but eventually Loki pins him in such a way that Tony habitually relaxes and lets him take the wheel. They've done this several times, hold each other down, and Loki is especially good at pinning Tony's wrists over his head, scraping his teeth over Tony's throat and jerking both of them off at the same time. It's a level of ambidextrousness Tony didn't use to find often in his partners.

It's not extraordinary but it's very good, even better because it's been so long. Tony comes with a groan swallowed up by Loki's mouth and falls limp with another, less happy groan because despite being careful, this didn't exactly make his belly feel better. Still, aftershocks make him shiver pleasantly and he sighs, looking up at Loki with hooded eyes. Loki has pushed himself up to his knees and is looking down at him, jerking himself off slowly. Only the way he bites his lips tells Tony how close he is.

Tony licks his lips and smiles. "You going to come on me, Loki? Mark me with your come?"

Loki grins, showing his teeth. "I don't believe there is any need for that," he pants. "You already know you belong to me." With a shudder and a quiet sigh he comes, eyelashes fluttering. Tony watches with fascination as Loki's face relaxes. He looks like a porn magazine spread, body sleekly muscular and skin glowing with a faint sheen of sweat. If Tony had the energy he'd throw him on his back and lick him all over, physically capable or not. They've fucked with much worse aches and pains.

The tired but very pleased smile lighting Loki's face makes it clear that he can follow the direction Tony's thoughts are taking. "Later," he promises, voice but a purr.

"Deal." Tony smiles and stretches his arms pleasantly. "Shower?"

"In a bit." Lying down on his side next to Tony, Loki yawns, eyes falling closed.

Tony sighs and lets himself doze off as well.

Jarvis wakes them up half an hour before dinner. There are a few breathless moments where Tony feels like somebody took out the arc reactor until he remembers that Bruce is taking care of baby girl. She's fine and if she weren't, they're just a few rooms down. Somebody would have told them.

The two of them take a quick shower and then find their daughter in the living room, where she's lying on a blanket and Bruce is sitting cross-legged next to her, reading a lab report out loud. Clint is playing xbox on mute and Thor is sitting on the sofa, possibly pretending to watch Clint but if that's the case he's doing a very bad job because his eyes are mainly focused on the baby, only flicking occasionally to the TV.

"Hey darling," Tony says, trying his hardest not to coo because she might be a baby but that doesn't mean he's going to coo. Using Bruce's shoulder as support he sinks to his knees on the blanket next to her. Loki sits down next to him, leaning in to nuzzle her face before he makes room for Tony to pick her up. She flails her arms a little when he does so but seems happy enough.

"Everything okay?" Tony asks Bruce.

"Yeah, she's a real angel." Bruce smiles at them. There's something different about him, he seems relieved for some reason; Tony can't figure out the cause though.

"She's super quiet," Clint pipes up. "Have you ever even heard her scream?"

"When she was born," Loki replies.

"Yeah, she can be loud if the need arises," Tony adds. "Just apparently it doesn't do so often in her opinion."

Loki hums and leans in to kiss her on the head. "She's very even-tempered."

"Guys?" Steve pokes his head into the living room. "Dinner is ready."

"A propos, when did she last eat?" Tony asks Bruce.

"About an hour ago." Taking Thor's offered hand, Bruce raises and wanders off. Loki doesn't give his brother the opportunity to help him up as well; he gets up on his own and takes baby girl off Tony so Thor can help him up. Family politics. Tony doesn't really get it, but whatever.

They enter the kitchen simultaneously with Bruce, who is bringing the car seat. They attach it to a chair – it's all been prepared in advance, foresighted as they are – and put baby girl in it. And Tony can finally, finally sit on the kitchen sofa again. It had been too low and not deep enough for him with the baby belly.

Over the next two days they start to settle into a sort of routine with baby girl; it goes way better than Tony had expected most of the time. Over night he and Loki are responsible for her, her crib is in their room because Loki hadn't liked the idea of her sleeping alone for the first couple of months. During the day the others volunteer a lot, eager to spend time with her; Tony really hadn't expected that. Though Loki is still wary of Thor – not obviously, he doesn't say anything, but when Thor holds her Loki tenses and doesn't let anything distract him until Thor gives her away again, and Loki doesn't allow for Thor to be alone with her. Tony hasn't even bothered yet suggesting for Thor to take care of her while they take their nap to catch up on the sleep they lose over night.

On the third day after the birth, however, Tony's pulled back into reality less-than-gently. Some time after breakfast, Tony and Natasha are sitting on the floor tickling baby girl to see her flail and try to make her smile, Loki seeks him out and says, "Thor and I will have to go to Asgard today."

That sobers Tony up pretty quickly. He glances at Natasha who nods, no words needed, and follows Loki out into the hall. "Why do you need to go to Asgard?" Of course he remembers the feast, he didn't really forget about it to begin with, but it sort of slipped his mind over everything else. But he clearly remembers that they said it'd be a week after the birth.

"To discuss the preparation of the feast with the Allfather and mother," Loki explains.

Okay, that makes sense. Tony wouldn't have thought they'd need both Thor and Loki for that, though. He wants to ask if that's all there is to it but something about Loki's manner stops him. He's understandably tense about the whole thing; as far as Tony knows, the last "family reunion" was during Loki's trial and thus can't really be called that. "Okay," is all he says in the end. "Want me and baby girl to come with you?"

Loki tenses. "No." His face is stiff and his voice cool as he continues, "Before I allow my baby onto Asgard, I'm going to lay down some ground rules."

Ah. In Loki-speak, that probably means he's going to threaten some people. Tony can't say he minds at all, but he is a little worried. The relationship between Odin and Loki is very, very tense and while Tony has never met the man, he figures there's only so much leeway he'll give Loki even if he's defending his child. It's highly likely that when Loki went there to more or less demand that Odin allow him to take an immortality-giving apple for Tony he lost a fair amount of ground with the guy. God. Whatever.

"Okay," Tony says again. "When are you leaving?"

"Now." Loki glances towards the other end of the hall where Thor is waiting. Tony didn't even notice him.

He licks his lips. This is all very sudden and he doesn't like it and the idea of being alone with baby girl… it makes him nervous. Loki is the only one of them who has any experience with babies, excepting Thor. "Just… be careful, okay?"

Loki frowns at him, looking like he's contemplating whether to be offended or not at the suggestion that he might not be.

Fuck it. "I need you, okay? So. Just. That. Yeah."

Immediately, Loki's eyes soften. "Don't worry. I know exactly how far I can push." He cups Tony's face and kisses him. "I will return for dinner."

Tony lets him go with reluctance. He believes Loki when he says he knows which lines not to cross, but Odin and Loki have the tendency to rub each other the wrong way. And Tony remembers very well what it's like to meet one's father with all the right intentions. Especially when all it takes is one wrong look from said father to push one into defense, which sometimes is the exact same thing as offense, especially where Loki and Tony are concerned.

When he returns to the living room Natasha is still sitting with baby girl, one hand soothingly on her belly. In her other hand she's holding her mobile, intently listening. Her brows are furrowed and when she glances up at Tony he already knows what she's going to say.

"I have to go," she indeed says after hanging up. "Hawkeye needs me." Clint is off on S.H.I.E.L.D. business.

"Okay, be careful, sweetheart," Tony jokes. She rolls her eyes, kisses baby girl on the forehead and heads off to gear up. Five minutes later she glides back into the room.

"Call if you need anything."

Tony rolls his eyes. "Despite common misconception, I am a functioning adult. Besides, it's not like you can answer the phone while on a mission."

She snorts. "Debatable. And I meant call Steve or Bruce, they're still here."

Tony bristles. "I am perfectly capable of being alone with my daughter, thank you."

"For fuck's sake!" Natasha throws her hands into the air. "I know that. We all know that. So don't try to prove something we already know by not asking for help when you do need it."

Admittedly, that does sound like Tony. A bit. "Yeah. Okay."

With a relieved smile, Natasha leans down to hug him quickly before striding to the roof, where Tony can faintly hear a helicopter.

"Well," Tony says, waving the finger baby girl is clinging to a little. "Looks we're alone, darling. Whatever shall we do?"

"Tony?" Steve says two hours later, sounding very confused. "What are you doing?"

Tony looks up. "Well, what does it look like?"

Steve eyes him, the camera he's holding in one hand and baby girl, nestled safely in the crook of Tony's arm. "Like you're filming?"

"Then that's what I'm doing." Tony decides not to mention the part where Tony was the narrator of baby girl's inner thoughts while leading her through the top floor, introducing her to the rooms and explaining what the Avengers living here like to do in them. He'd made sure to point out all the hiding spots in the ceiling Clint prefers, even the ones he's not supposed to know about, and have her comment on how ridiculous they are. He's planning to cut it and, with a couple of added effects such as music and dramatic lightening (and perhaps some CGI) to make an awesome video.

"Okay," Steve says hesitantly, eyeing him. He knows Tony. "I was planning to go to the park a bit, would you like to come with me? Both of you."

Frowning, Tony lowers the camera. "You want me to go out. You are aware that we'll be hounded by paparazzi?"

But Steve knows the game a little by this point. "Just for half an hour, and if we take Bruce with us, it should be fine." He pauses, carefully thinking about how to put the next part. "It will happen eventually, one way or the other. Neither you nor the baby can stay inside forever, and I think some nature and fresh air would be good for you both." And with Bruce there, everybody is a lot more wary of crowding them. His presence of course doesn't keep anyone from using their zoom lens, but there's really nothing at all Tony can do about that.

"What does Bruce say?" They'll be using him as buffer, after all.

"He was the one who suggested he'd come with as deterrent," Steve admits.

Tony thinks about that for a moment. He would like to go outside; hell, it's been months since he last had and now that Steve has reminded him he's itching, even for just half an hour in the park. And as much as he'd like to keep his daughter from the public, he knows that's completely impossible for him if he isn't willing to take drastic measures – never let her out, if there is no choice about it cover her head with a bag or something – and he just isn't willing to do that. She'll get a complex that way, and while he knows very well what it's like to grow up followed by reporters, there's not much he can do about that. Even if he had led a perfectly boring, quiet life himself, due to his father, money and position they still would be interested in him and his daughter. And with both Steve and Bruce there, things shouldn't get too out of hand.

"Yeah, okay."

A smile blossoms on Steve's face. "Great."

They don't waste much time preparing; Tony decides not to take a pram or anything because if they do have to make a quick exit, that will pretty much make it impossible. Instead he wraps baby girl in a blanket and uses a big cloth to make a baby sling. The weather is mild, moderately sunny but with a low breeze so Tony is glad baby girl hasn't yet shown any opposition to the hats they keep putting on her. Steve has his camera with him – he likes taking photos of random things.

In the elevator down Tony starts feeling jittery, but Bruce distracts him with a good question about the nanobots the two of them are developing on and off. The tech about them isn't the problem, apart from the size; it's the collective intelligence and that they have to recognize independently which cells to destroy and which to leave alone and possibly also in which body area to operate.

They discuss this for a good ten minutes, and by the time they're done for now they've arrived at the nearby park. Steve is leading them to a bench in a less open area, which has the advantage that they won't be presented as if on a silver platter but the downside that the paparazzi can hide in the bushes. But they can't do much better, and at least Tony feels a little safer in the knowledge that they won't dare come too close because they're terrified of pissing off Bruce.

Steve and Bruce flank Tony as they sit down. Steve takes out a book from the back pocket of his jeans and Bruce brings up an idea he had had to prevent the body's own immune system from attacking the nanobots, and Tony is distracted again.

Of course he knows what they're doing; they're protecting and distracting him, but really, he can't say he minds, not in light of the fact that he's carrying baby girl and really nervous about taking her outside for the first time.

For a while it goes well; baby girl is sleeping and if anyone who walks by them recognizes them despite the sunglasses, they don't do anything about it. But eventually baby girl wakes up, and while she's generally happy for an opportunity to drool on Tony's chest she doesn't seem to like much that her vision is completely obscured. She doesn't scream, of course she doesn't, Tony hasn't heard her scream since the birth, but she wriggles in the way she does when she's unhappy and makes tiny, displeased noises.

In the vague hope that it'll be good enough for her Tony raises the cloth and tilts her a little so she can see him. "Hey, darling. It's fine, no reason to worry."

"Your daddy is right here," Steve adds, hooking his chin over Tony's shoulder.

She doesn't seem particularly impressed and Tony can understand her; she likes to flail her arms as if she's conducting an imaginary concert and the cloth obstructs her movements pretty much completely. Besides, he tells himself, he took her to the park so she can be outside for a bit; they might as well have stayed inside if he just keeps her completely covered and close to his chest.

So he gets off the bench and picks a place on the grass that isn't completely exposed to the sun but neither completely in the shadows before sitting down there. Steve and Bruce flank him once more, the three of them building something of a circle with a patch of grass in the middle. Bruce helps him get baby girl out of the cloth and Tony puts her in the crook of his arm. He lets her get used a bit to the dapples sunlight falling on them through the leaves of the tree in whose shadow they sit. Steve takes a couple of photos and Tony jokes that they can just print them off the internet instead when they get home. He's noticed at least two paparazzi trying to creep closer through the bushes, and one that just stands on the path and zooms at them, not bothering at all to hide. He's certain that if he asked Jarvis he'd know of at least two more, but he doesn't bother. He notices them, but that's all the attention he wastes on them.

Instead, he concentrates on baby girl. Bruce suggests, "Should we take off her socks and let her feel the grass a bit?" which Tony deems a good idea, so they proceed to do just that.

"I'll film this so the others can watch later," Steve says eagerly.

"You do that," Tony replies, vaguely amused. Ever since he got the camera Steve has been pretty intent on documenting everything, taking both a fair number of photos and the occasional video of mostly completely normal things, such as dinner. Tony had decided not to tell him that he's long ago appointed Jarvis to take pictures from the security cameras of things he thought might be worth of being committed to posterity.

Now that baby girl is born Tony figures he'll have to start taking pictures on his own; he can't just let Jarvis do all the work. He has the intention of making a baby book, because, as sentimental as it is, he'd always hated that his own had been compiled by his nanny. He had determined very early on that he would, if he ever had children, make them a photo album himself.

Of course he hadn't known to expect the Avengers then, and now he figures it's okay too if Steve takes the pictures; actually it's good because that means that there will be more pictures with Tony and baby girl together. There hadn't been many such pictures of Tony with his own parents, and most of those were photo ops for publicity.

So Steve films as Bruce pulls the socks off baby girl's tiny feet and then as Tony arranges her in his lap in such a way that her feet touch the grass. She kicks her legs and overall doesn't seem to be impressed either way, but hey, here's baby girl's first contacted with nature, forever committed for eternity.

"Well, that was anticlimactic," Tony says. "Seems like she comes after daddy."

"Does Loki like nature?" Bruce asks, sounding a bit surprised. And of course they wouldn't know; Loki had spent all his time inside since he moved in with them, if not directly with Tony at least in his general vicinity. He hadn't been hovering in such a way that it had annoyed Tony (much), but he certainly hadn't done all the things he usually does.

"He has this meditation thing he does," Tony thus explains, "where he sits in nature and does some magic concentration techniques. Well, not really concentrating techniques, he just… it sounds silly, but he says he feels life."

"Because magic is in everything, he told me that once," Bruce says. "Sometimes I'd really like to see the world through his eyes."

Tony thinks of the void, the space between realms he had caught a brief glimpse of years ago when he'd flown that nuclear bomb through the wormhole and says nothing. There hadn't been anything for him to see – nothing his eyes could perceive, at least – but he had been filled with horror nevertheless, a crawling sensation as if something was trying to climb into his head through his eyes and the only thing that was saving him was the fact that he couldn't see it.

No, he's quite glad he doesn't see the world the way Loki does.

"What was that?" Bruce asks.

Tony blinks and returns to the present. "What?"

"You had a look about you." Bruce makes a gesture towards his face. "What is it?"

"Nothing." When Bruce frowns he shakes his head. "No, it's nothing. I was just thinking of the void and how I'm actually really glad I don't see things the way Loki does."

Steve lowers the camera, wearing a frown as well. "Which void?"

"Our first Avengers mission," Tony says, already regretting having brought it up at all. "The other side of the wormhole."

"You said during the debrief and in the report that there wasn't anything, just space and the Chitauri." Steve's frown has deepened.

"I said I couldn't see anything," Tony corrects. "And that's perfectly true. But I could… feel something. There was something else there."

"Why didn't you say so in the report?"

Tony rolls his eyes. "You kidding me? I couldn't see anything, Sir, but I know something was out there, I could feel it? You all would've thought I was just trying to be the center of attention again, don't deny it."

Steve grimaces. He clearly doesn't like it but he's self-aware enough to know that Tony is speaking the truth. Despite the fact that they had worked together – and done so excellently by all accounts – they hadn't been much of a team back then. It had taken many more missions, living together and a lot of time before they arrived there.

"Besides," Tony adds after letting that sink in for a moment, "It wasn't nice, but it wasn't the stalker type of not nice. I just wouldn't recommend we extend our exploration towards space just yet because we might find it."

"Is that why you refused to build a spaceship for S.H.I.E.L.D.?" Steve asks, face clearing with the realization.

Tony nods. "Yeah."

"But what was it?" Bruce asks. "It must have been something."

"I honestly don't want to know," Tony says with frank sincerity. That shuts both of them up; Tony isn't really the type to let things go. "And I'd be grateful if we could change the topic now, thanks."

"I'm thinking it's time for us to leave," Bruce says after a brief pause. "It's getting a bit crowded."

After a quick glance around Tony grimaces. "Yeah, let's."

Bruce puts the socks back over baby girl's feet and then helps Tony get her back into the baby sling. Steve helps them up and the two of them do their best to cover Tony from the curious eyes of passer-bys and the obnoxious lenses of paparazzi. They're both looking less than inviting so nobody dares approach, and Tony has put on sunglasses and is covering baby girl with both arms, pretending not to notice the more daring reporters who fling questions at them from a distance.

When they're back in the tower, all three of them breathe a sigh of relief.

"Well, we probably can't do this again anytime soon," Tony comments. Now that they know to look out, the paparazzi will start all but camping in front of the tower again.

"But at least you've finally both been outside," Steve replies. "And next time Loki can take you somewhere more private."

Yeah, that sounds like a good idea.

Sometime in the evening, after Thor and Loki have come back and after they've had dinner and put baby girl to bed, Loki finds Tony in his lab. He's wearing a frown and looks rather unhappy. "You have seen the void," he says abruptly. "Why have you never told me?"

Tony blinks. "It honestly never occurred to me. Why would I?"

"That's why you were giving me "the benefit of the doubt", is it not?" Loki asks. He's directly quoting what Tony had said to him the first time they had met not as opponents on the battle field; Tony hadn't called S.H.I.E.L.D. when he'd spotted Loki, entirely accidentally, at an art gallery opening. They had bantered a bit until Loki had asked him why, and that's what Tony had said. He'd refused to explain at the time, and Loki hasn't asked again since.

Technically, he didn't ask now either. Tony clears his throat and walks around the hologram table to face Loki. "Yeah. Honestly, you looked crazed on the security material and, having seen what I… well, didn't see… I figured it's a wonder you had managed to remain as sane as you were, considering you were out there for months." The thought alone makes Tony shudder.

Suddenly Loki grabs his shoulder, grip less than gentle. "What did you see?" he demands with wide eyes.

"Nothing, I just felt… well, something not good. I was out there less than a minute but it was more than enough to tell that I don't ever want to go back."

Loki cups Tony's head with one hand. "Let me," he commands, barely waiting for Tony's permitting nod before presumably sending his magic through Tony's body, or possibly his mind.

After a few tense moments he sags. He's gentle now when he pulls Tony close, wraps his arms around him and presses his lips to Tony's temple. "You're fine," he breathes, sounding incredibly relieved.

"Of course I'm fine," Tony replies, carefully wrapping his arms around Loki's waist. "You would have noticed long ago if I weren't."

"Yes." Loki takes a deep breath. "Of course I would have."

They stand in silence for a moment, Tony giving Loki some time to calm down before he asks, "What was that about?" But of course he already suspects, so he adds, "Steve was still filming when we talked about it earlier, wasn't he?"

"Yes. Though he didn't notice at the time."

"I'm not annoyed. It's not like I was deliberately keeping a secret or anything, I just never talked about it."

Loki nods. "It's… very, very dangerous out there," he says carefully.

"I know." Tony closes his eyes, presses his forehead into Loki's collarbone. "I felt it trying to get a hook into my mind. If I had been there any longer, it would have succeeded."

Loki's arms around him tighten so much that for a moment Tony can't breathe. "If you ever feel something like that again," he says quietly, "Call me immediately."

Tony doesn't point out that it might be too late by the time his call reaches Loki. Instead, he says, "Jarvis, implement an immediate call to Loki alerting him of the situation. We'll call it protocol mindsteal."

"Of what situation precisely, sir?" Jarvis inquires delicately.

"Someone is trying to take over my mind."

"Protocol mindsteal understood and implemented, sir. Would you like to choose a number code in addition to the word code?"

"Yeah. Make it two seven five oh."

"Protocol mindsteal updated, number code implemented, Sir."

"I would give you an amulet that could protect you to a point," Loki says, "but it needs to be worn on the chest at all times, and you're already wearing something above the heart that's been proven to cancel magic in the past." He tabs the arc reactor.

Tony grimaces. "Still not gong to let you test that, sorry." They've been over that once or twice; Tony isn't going to let anybody but himself fuck around with the arc reactor, especially not while he's wearing it, which, as Loki's informed him, would be required.

"I understand your reservations," Loki replies. He sighs and kisses Tony on the temple again.

Taking a deep breath, Tony decides that he'll probably not get as good an opportunity to ask as this. "So I was right? You weren't in your right mind."

"Not quite," Loki admits. "Though by the time I got here, my mind had been warped enough that I couldn't even tell anymore. And to be honest, even if it hadn't been, I still wouldn't have had any qualms about killing humans, though I probably wouldn't have used a Chitauri army to do it. I'm not a good person, Tony," he warns.

Tony rolls his eyes. "I know that. Believe me, I didn't make any excuses for you to talk myself into sleeping with you. I'm not a good person either and honestly, that was a big part of the attraction at the time."

A slow, viciously pleased smile spreads on Loki's face. It sends a shiver down Tony's back, reminds him of those first few times when they'd fought by fucking. "Is that so, Stark?" Loki purrs, intonation very much reminiscent of then as well.

Oh, Loki wants to play. Tony can do that.

Taking a step back he leans against the table, lets his eyes go cold even as he grins. "Most definitely." He raises an eyebrow.

"You think because you have killed some people you're a match to me?" Loki steps up to him, brackets him with both hands on the table next to Tony's hips.

Tony makes a split decision; this could go two ways, but they've gone down one path before, it's how they got here in the first place. It would be much more interesting if he…with a smirk, he leans in close enough to feel Loki's breath on his mouth. "I'm certainly enough of a match for an alliance," he says.

Surprise flares briefly in Loki's eyes; Tony is well aware that the only reason he sees it at all is because they're just playing. Loki has one hell of a poker face when he needs so. However, he doesn't expect the ferocity of Loki's reaction once he realizes what game Tony is playing. Loki abruptly pulls Tony in at the neck and kisses him, passionate and wild, crowding him against the table. Tony gives as good as he gets but Loki has the height and strength advantage so pretty soon he ends up sitting on the table, Loki between his legs.

"Bed," Tony gasps, less because he doesn't want to fuck on the table and more because it'll give him an opportunity to get on top again. He wants to fuck Loki, properly. It's been far, far too long since he last could.

Loki smirks and bites his neck, pushes him further onto the table. "What makes you think I'll do what you want?"

"Because otherwise I'll have to make you." Tony gasps. "Butterfingers." The robot wakes up behind Loki and rises, tilts its arm forward, giving the impression of eyeing them.

"Now." Tony smiles at Loki. "Unless you want for my AI to shock you I suggest you let me off the table and come with me to the bed."

With an air of annoyance Loki pulls back. "You won't always have your little toys with you," he warns.

Tony smiles teasingly and pushes off the table, sliding real close against Loki in the process. "I'm generally never without my toys, you'll find." He leads Loki into the small bedroom next to his lab; it's been months since he last used it for anything but catnaps. Loki follows, and he knows Tony well enough to expect something so Tony just pulls his shirt over his head and throws himself onto the bed, stretching his arms over his head and smiling at Loki. Loki merely comments that with a raised eyebrow, climbing onto the bed and crawling on top of Tony. His eyes are intense and when he kisses him Tony loses a bit track of the game, because it's not the kiss of enemies possibly forming an alliance. It's too slow, too intense for that, and Loki cups Tony's face like he's... like he's important to him.

Not that Tony minds. No, he's perfectly fine with that. He enjoys kissing, especially the way Loki does it, intent and thorough with a lot of tongue, a bit of teeth. Tony forgets all about taking control, especially when Loki licks down his throat and scrapes his teeth over his larynx, sucks a mark into the skin above his pulse point. He's so slow and focused, every move purposeful like he's been planning to bite him just there, press his tongue in exactly here – like he's been thinking about it in detail. It sends shivers down Tony's back.

"Fuck," Tony curses hoarsely, blinking up at the ceiling. He had a plan, there was a plan, and this is not going according to that plan, he's fairly sure.

"I believe that is on the agenda," Loki hums silkily, flicking the tip of his tongue over one of Tony's nipples, making him shudder. When he looks up his eyes are dark and suddenly Tony remembers how this was supposed to go.

Before Loki and his silver tongue can convince him to just let things proceed he takes Loki by the shoulders and flips them over, presses him into the mattress. With no intention to give Loki an opportunity to push back Tony distracts him with a kiss far less slow than their previous one and opens Loki's jeans. A moment later he's pulled them down and is sucking Loki's dick into his mouth, too fast for Loki to know what is happening until his cock is surrounded by wet heat.

The surprised groan Loki makes fills Tony with satisfaction; usually Loki isn't that loud so quickly. Tony definitely isn't the only one who's missed this.

He sucks hard, less to make a point and more just because he wants to. As Loki curls up a little and grunts, one of his hands finds its way into Tony's hair, gripping tight without hurting. That'll change as Loki gets closer, Tony knows; Loki's other hand will find its way to his shoulder and his fingernails will dig in when he comes. Tony almost decides that he'd rather have that now, but Loki's thighs fall open deliciously when he finally manages to pull his jeans and boxers off his legs and Tony really, really wants to have them wrapped around his hips. He wants to fuck Loki hard.

"No!" Loki protests loudly when Tony pulls off completely. "Who gave you permission to stop?"

Licking his lips, Tony looks up at him. "Get me the lube, then."

Loki practically flings himself across the bed, reaching for the nightstand. Tony takes the time to open his own pants and relieve the pressure on his dick, sliding his hand into his boxers to take hold of himself. When Loki spots that as he turns back, lube in hand, he smirks. "Problem?"

"We're gonna have one if I don't get to fuck you soon," Tony says seriously, making a grabby hand for the lube.

But Loki makes a thoughtful face and holds it out of his reach. "I cannot remember agreeing to this."

Tony narrows his eyes. "Is that how you wanna play it, yes? I could make you."

Honestly amused Loki laughs and sits up, one hand wrapping around Tony's neck to pull him in. Their lips touch but it's not a kiss, not with the way Tony holds himself still, with Loki not giving in enough to make it one. "Perhaps I'm going to ride you," Loki murmurs, pulling Tony's lower lip between his teeth.

"No," Tony says sharply. "You're going to lie on your back, spread your legs and let me fuck you. I might allow you go on your hands and knees, but I'm the one who's going to do the fucking, and you're the one who's going to let me."

Loki affects a speculative look that can't completely hide the intrigue behind it. "Oh, am I? And what will you give me in return for the privilege?"

"An amazing orgasm?" Tony raises an eyebrow. "Also, maybe next time I'm going to let you do the same to me."

"So you have already decided there will be a next time, then," Loki returns, amused. "I have not even agreed yet to form an alliance with you."

"Well you better do it quick because if you don't I'm going to take care of this myself." To demonstrate, Tony pushes his pants and underwear down to his knees and wraps his hand back around his cock, squeezing and letting his eyelids flutter at the pleasure that courses through his body.

Loki watches him with hot eyes for a moment before he licks his lips. "I'm going to tie you to the bed and fuck you twice next time," he promises, voice low.

"And you're going to ride me," Tony adds, biting his lower lip.

With a smile and no reply Loki lies back down. Tony expects him to hand the lube over but of course Loki has his own ideas; he loves to defy expectations. He lifts his hips and puts a pillow under them, spreads his legs obscenely wide, knees up. Tony is distracted staring at him for only a moment, but it's enough for him to be surprised when Loki suddenly reaches glistening fingers between his legs, palming his balls, digging into his perineum and then sliding one finger into his hole.

Tony's mouth goes dry at the image in front of him; Loki always looks like sin personified especially in bed but this is a special level of hot. It reminds him of the video he once made of Loki jerking off; when Fury had pissed him off especially he'd started watching it on mute in his presence, pretending to be busy with important company stuff. It's been ages since he last saw the video.

"Stark," Loki barks, abruptly pulling him out of his memories. "I believe you were busy."

Ah, right. He raises an eyebrow challengingly. "Make room for me then."

With an annoyed sigh Loki pulls his fingers out, pulls one leg up to his chest and reaches around to go back to stretching himself. It's insane how flexible he is; Tony can't wait to have those thighs wrapped around him, tensing every time he pushes inside.

First things first, though. Chucking his pants completely he crawls between Loki's legs, puts one hand on the inside of Loki's thigh and sucks his cock back into his mouth, not too mindful of his teeth by this point. Loki moans and puts his free hand back on Tony's head, pushing him down. Tony allows it, swallows around Loki's cock to make him shiver and enjoys the small noises he makes. He can't see it, the angle is completely wrong, but he's sure that Loki is fucking himself to the same rhythm Tony sucks his cock with, especially when Loki's hips start rolling with it, back into his fingers and forth into Tony's mouth. He loves this, loves the way Loki surrenders to him and lets him take control. One of the things that always drew him back to Loki was how absolutely shameless he is in bed, not caring at all how loud he's being, how he might look. Then again, it's really nothing he needs to worry about; he always looks gorgeous, never more when he's like this, sweaty and flushed and chasing pleasure. Tony enjoys it so much he almost doesn't want to pull off when Loki decides he's ready and pulls his fingers out, but he wants to feel Loki's body tense around his dick when he comes.

"Come on," Loki growls when Tony isn't moving fast enough for his taste.

"Patience," Tony chides, belying his advice by pulling Loki into an impatient kiss the next moment. A slick hand wraps around his cock, making him whine with pleasure as it slicks him up thoroughly. Then things go very quickly; they have practice at this so they're pretty in sync. As Loki pulls his hand away Tony leans back, adjusts the pillow under Loki's hips while Loki pulls his legs up, spreading them wide. Surprisingly, Loki stays still when Tony brings his cock to his entrance, doesn't push up the way he often does when Tony thrusts in with one smooth, even-paced roll of his hips.

A strangled noise escapes Tony's lips while Loki moans happily when he's in to the hilt. He manages to keep still for just a moment before he has to move, starts to pick up an even, hard rhythm that sends pleasure coursing through both of them.

"Yes," Loki gasps, blinking sweat out of his eyes as he looks up at Tony. He doesn't say anything else but fuck if Tony doesn't hear a plea for him not to stop nevertheless. And he has absolutely no intention of stopping, isn't sure he could even if he would; they've just started and he's already close. It's such a rush, Loki's body hot and tight around him, his legs wrapped around Tony the way he's been dreaming about for weeks, and he looks utterly debauched with his sweaty hair a wild mess on the pillow, clinging to his temples and forehead. And the way he looks at Tony, eyes dark with barely any green visible, mouth open and red and the noises he makes, utterly shameless – fuck if it doesn't all go straight to his dick, the way he can make Loki lose himself completely.

"Oh no you don't," Tony growls and catches one of Loki's hands that has been making its way down to his cock. "You're going to come just from this."

When he lets go Loki tries to reach for his dick again so Tony takes his hand and pins it above Loki's head, adding the other for good measure. Of course the only reason he can keep them there with one hand is because Loki lets him, but that only makes it better – the fact that Loki submits to him because he likes it, wants for Tony to take control.

With his free hand Tony reaches down and takes hold of Loki's hip, digs his fingers in to leave bruises just because he can. Loki's eyelids flutter shut every time he thrusts in and it takes him an increasing effort to keep them open, Tony can see it. Just to see what Loki will do he thrusts harder, increases the pace; he's rewarded with the sight of Loki throwing his head back with a loud groan, baring his throat.

Knowing that neither of them will last for much longer, Tony leans down, digs his teeth into the muscle connecting Loki's shoulder and neck. Loki's heels dig into his ass and back, spurring him on, and he increases the pace accordingly, rhythm turning a bit erratic. Biting his way up towards Loki's ear, Tony growls breathlessly, "You're perfect."

Loki groans and arches up, trying to press his cock against Tony's belly, but it changes the angle of Tony's thrusts so he doesn't hit his prostate anymore so with a whimper he sags back into the mattress. "Tony," he whines, "Tony, Tony, Tony."

"Loki," Tony gasps back. He'll come very soon, so he lets go of Loki's hip and wraps his hand around his cock instead, managing to squeeze just once before Loki throws his head back once more and comes with a yell, come spilling between them. That, combined with the tightening of his body around Tony, sends Tony over the edge as well and he screams as orgasm crashes through him. He doesn't manage to stop himself from collapsing on top of Loki; it's all he can do to land only half on top of him, giving him enough room to breathe.

"Shit," Tony gasps once he has enough air in his lungs to waste some of it on speech. They're both still shivering with aftershocks, bodies sliding against each other wetly, sticky.

Loki hums tiredly, sliding his hand up Tony's back. He tilts his head, letting his temple bump into Tony's forehead.

Turning his head, Tony presses his mouth into Loki's shoulder. "Fuck, I needed that."

"Yes," Loki agrees tiredly.

They doze for a bit but Tony doesn't allow himself to fall asleep, very aware that anytime now baby girl could wake up and demand food. And he really doesn't want to go up to her sweaty and smelling of sex.

With a reluctant sigh he pushes himself up, looks down on Loki who blinks up at him tiredly. "We better go take a shower," Tony murmurs, brushing the hair out of Loki's forehead.

Loki sighs but nods, sitting up with a grimace. They share a tired grin and take a quick shower before heading back upstairs. Baby girl isn't up yet so Tony goes to check out the contents of the fridge for a quick snack.

Steve is in the kitchen, drinking green tea with Bruce and Clint; they look surprised which is probably due to the fact that Tony is humming under his breath. "You look happy," Steve comments.

"Steeeeeve," Tony sing-songs, twirling around and taking Steve's hand, clutching it to his chest. "Steve, Steve, Steve," he says very earnestly, leaning in close. "I finally have a sex life again. Everything is beautiful and nothing hurts." Well okay he's sore, especially his belly, but it's in the good way.

Behind them Clint chokes and starts giggling into his elbow. Bruce just sips his tea and seems utterly unimpressed while Steve flushes deep red and pulls his hand away. "Tony!" He's been exposed to Tony for too long to be truly scandalized but he puts up a good show of it. "I did not need to know that!"

Tony grins and winks. "I'm free as a bird, baby, don't harsh my mellow."

Steve stares at him for a moment. "You know, this actually explains so much."

"You're only getting it now?" Clint pipes up from the table, still looking terribly entertained. Bruce smiles serenely, amused as well.

"Getting what?" Tony asks, turning back to the fridge. Maybe some yoghurt? Or oooh, Doritos… perfect.

"Sex is an integral part to your happiness," Clint says.

Raising both eyebrows, Tony turns back to them. "You're seriously only figuring that out now?"

"I just…" Still deep red in the face, Steve flaps his hand. "It's just entirely different for me."

"To each their own, sweetheart," Tony says earnestly, patting Steve on the shoulder. "It's all fine. Now, I have a god to feed, have a good night!"

"Night babe!" Clint calls after him, echoed by Steve and Bruce – though without the term of endearment. Clint is always the best person to playfully flirt with; Steve sometimes jokingly calls him "honey" but graphic exchanges of the things they're (not) going to do to each other is more Clint's forte. By this point Tony doesn't think that's going to change; it's just the way Steve is.

Loki is out on the balcony, having vanished a part of the railing in order to let his legs dangle over the edge. He smiles when Tony joins him, holding out the bag of Doritos to him. Loki takes one and together they munch tortilla chips, throwing crumbles over the edge and once a whole chip to see it get blown away by the wind. The mood is so peaceful and content Tony decides not to ask anything about what happened on Asgard today. He'd love to know because when they had gotten back all Loki had said "fine" with a blank expression but he can just as well ask tomorrow and not ruin the mood today.

They only go inside when Jarvis lets them know that it's time to feed baby girl.

The next day Tony enters the kitchen, still half asleep, to find Clint and Natasha huddled around a laptop, looking highly amused. Clint cheers – quietly, because Tony is carrying baby girl – when he spots him. "Have something to tell us, Tony?"

With a raised eyebrow, Tony settles baby girl in her seat. "Unless you want details on my sex life…?"

For some reason that makes both of them chortle. They're too busy giggling to tell him anything, so Tony walks over and turns the laptop, peering at the screen. On it is some gossip website with pictures of their trip to the park yesterday, focusing mostly on Bruce helping Tony take baby girl out of the baby sling, taking her socks off her and the two of them peering down at her as Tony dips her feet in the grass. Steve's back is to the camera and Tony finds he's barely even mentioned. The article is filled with cheesy lines about a family outing and suggestions that Bruce is the baby's other father, with some innuendo about lab accidents and geniuses taking things too far.

Both of Tony's eyebrows fly up. "Wait. They're thinking Bruce…? Wow. What does he say about that?"

"He doesn't know yet," Natasha tells him, sounding terribly amused but at least she's not laughing anymore. Clint is still giggling into her shoulder.

Tony frowns. "Okay. Where the hell did they get that idea?" Because it has been semi-official for quite a while now that Loki and Tony are an item, and that Loki is the, well, other father of the child.

"That's not all yet," Natasha says, clicking on another tab; Clint starts to laugh harder again. He sounds like he's crying.

It's a different website, this time with photos taken with Bruce's back to the camera, showing Steve leaning in to look down on baby girl with a soft expression. There's a photo of them sitting on the bench where Steve had put his arm on the backrest behind Tony's beck, and a third one when they'd left and Steve had put his hand in the small of Tony's back briefly. And of course, this website speculates as to the relationship between Tony and Steve, suggesting that Howard hadn't been the only Stark talented at messing with biology and that their child had been planned.

Tony stares at it for a long moment, not sure whether to be amused or annoyed. His expression makes Clint laugh even harder; he clearly finds the whole thing terribly amusing.

"I thought they knew about Loki," Tony says, frowning. But now that he thinks about it he realizes that there had never been an official statement, just unrelated ones about Loki and rumors about their relationship – seeded by them, yes, but it's not like the public will magically know which rumors are from them and which ones are just press speculations. Clearly, Tony should have been more on top of this, but he's never been impressed much by the press on him beyond finding it a source of entertainment and had left it to his PR people to take care of.

Deep in thought, Tony puts a call through to his PR guy and they discuss the situation over Tony's super-healthy breakfast of fruit loops. Tony really isn't too fond of making statements about his personal life – sure, he likes messing with the paparazzi and the press and generally everyone, but a honest statement about what's going on in his private life? It's none of anybody's business, in his opinion. But he knows very well that these rumors aren't going to go away just because he keeps his mouth shut. Quite the opposite: not saying anything will only add fuel to the fire, and the one who's going to have to deal with it in the end will be baby girl. In every article about her for likely the rest of her life will be speculation as to her origins, even if just a margin note, and she'll already have more than enough to deal with with Tony being her father. He's not going to do that to her on top of everything else.

So Tony agrees to make a statement on camera and publish it on his website for all the world to see. And because he's a man of his word he borrows Clint and Natasha's laptop, turns on the webcam and barely bothers to swallow his fruit loops before starting the video. "So," he starts, "I hear you people think I'm in relationships with both Bruce and Steve, or either of them, I'm not quite sure, and it seems like you aren't really either. While I'm incredibly flattered at your faith in my stamina and ability to keep both of them happy at the same time, I gotta disappoint you: neither Steve nor Bruce ever got intimate enough with me to have fathered my child. Which is a girl, by the way, so you can stop taking bets on that one, and I also am not going to sell pictures of or with her, so stop asking. I would've thought this was pretty obvious by this point, I think you guys were outraged about that for weeks and I'm surprised you forgot so quickly, but for the record, the only person I'm fucking is Loki, and he's the other parent of my child. This is as much information as I'm willing to give on this issue, because, this might be shocking news to you but honestly: it's none of your fucking business. Hope that cleared some stuff up for you."

"You are aware that you're wearing a Starfleet Academy t-shirt?" Natasha asks once Tony has turned the recording off.

Tony looks down at his chest, where the arc reactor is glowing faintly behind the Starfleet Academy Science logo, which is an awesome effect, if he does say so himself. "So?"

"Also, you're sporting a serious case of bed head," Clint points out.

"There's a sketch of Fury on the wall behind you with an arrow through his eye," Natasha adds.

"And a "sarcasm still loading" mug, which I think you've just proven wrong."

"What?" Tony frowns. "You wanna complain about the scenery?"

Natasha rolls her eyes. "We already are complaining."

"Your bowl is a blue cat," Clint says. "Classy."

"Oh, shut up," Tony grumbles, poking at his fruit loops. They're soggy now, which normally he doesn't mind, but right now he doesn't like it.

"Aww don't pout, darling, we still love you even if you are geeky," Clint teases.

"On that note…" Natasha rises. "We have a meeting with Fury scheduled." She glides out of the room, Clint scrambling to catch up with her.

"Don't listen to them, they're mean," Tony tells baby girl, but it's not very satisfying because she just stares up at the ceiling with her wide, blue eyes.

"The feast is under preparation," Loki says curtly some time later when Tony asks him how his trip to Asgard went. He refuses to go into any more detail.

With a scowl, Tony takes baby girl and goes into the lab. Everybody is annoying today. At least his baby still loves him, and there's something inherently calming about the way she lies in his arms so trustingly, and in the way her hand curls around his finger, tiny but surprisingly strong.

Loki finds him in his small bedroom next to the lab, rolling around in bed with baby girl (he made the bed before putting her on it, of course, what sort of person do you take him for). "You are not in a good mood," he remarks.

"How perceptive of you," Tony snarks, not looking at him. He's lying on his side with baby girl next to his chest, patting the arc reactor curiously while Tony touches her nose. He just can't get over how tiny she is.

With a sigh Loki climbs onto the bed, curling up around Tony's back. Over Tony's shoulder he peers down at their daughter, one arm wrapped around Tony's waist. He doesn't say anything, certainly doesn't ask Tony what he's thinking about, so Tony doesn't shake him off.

"Did anyone tell you?" Tony asks eventually.

"Tell me what?" Loki returns the question. He probably has some idea, it's rare that he doesn't at least have educated speculations, but he wants for Tony to tell him what's bothering him, not play a guessing game.

Knowing this but not caring, Tony scowls. Earlier, he made the mistake of checking whether the video was already up on his page – which it is, despite some criticism by the PR guy (some of which echoing Clint and Natasha's teasing). The video hadn't been the problem; it's people's reactions that are. Tony would've thought they'd keep that sort of thing off his website, but of course the opposite is the fact. Maybe he should've been more on top of things when this first went viral, then he wouldn't have been caught so off-guard now. "The world is full of homophobic assholes."

Loki keeps silent. Of course he knows what Tony is talking about, but he's always met this sort of thing with complete incomprehension. Months ago they'd had a discussion about homophobia on Asgard – basically, it doesn't exist per se, partly because femininity isn't seen as a weakness there. Women on Asgard generally aren't warriors but they're pretty badass with the magic, apparently. Loki had grown fairly annoyed in the course of the discussion and Bruce had ended it by saying, "Basically, not everything Old Norse is also Asgardian." Which hadn't stopped Loki from being pissed at Midgardian narrow-mindedness, but at least it had stopped them from talking about it, which had been a very good thing by that point. Nobody has yet dared bring it up in front of Loki and Thor again, because they get pissed.

"I mean," Tony continues after a brief pause, "it's none of their fucking business who I fuck. It's not a morality discussion, it has nothing to do with politics or gay marriage or condoms or abortion or religion or anything. Though, religion maybe, considering it's a Norse God I'm fucking, but I don't think that's what they're alluding to." He considers the possibilities of bringing that up every time someone mentions the bible – wrong religion, but if you want to go down that road, asshole, I'm screwing a god. Your argument is invalid.

The idea of the sour lemon expressions that will incur cheers Tony up some, but not much, because it's only part of the fuckery that's happening on the internet right now. All the time, rather, but it's happening on Tony's virtual doorstep right now, his facebook page and his website and twitter, and that makes it hard to avoid.

"She's not… she's completely normal. Yeah, she literally has two daddies, but she's perfect. In every way. She's fine physically and she won't be psychologically damaged by not having a mother figure. And even if she might be, she has Natasha for a godmother, and Jane as a sort of aunt, and Pepper too, a little, once she's warmed up to her a little. She'll have everything she needs. She has everything she needs."

"Of course she does," Loki says, sounding scornful. He tightens his grip around Tony's waist and presses his lips to Tony's ear. "They are complete imbeciles, I really don't know why you let this get to you so." He sounds mightily peeved about it too.

"I'm not," Tony returns, piqued. "It's everything coming together. You won't tell me what the fuck happened on Asgard even though in three days I'll have to go there, the world is full of narrow-minded idiots who are all up in my business to the point where my company's stocks have fallen, which doesn't make any fucking sense because what the fuck does anything I do in private have to do with my company – which is fuelled by my genius, yes, but not only, and seriously when have I ever led anyone wrong professionally – and what the fuck. Just what the fuck, Loki." And now he's upset baby girl, because she's frowning and flailing unhappily. Tony hushes her and makes an effort to calm down, breathing deep.

"This world is full of morons," Loki says.

"Seriously. Maybe I shouldn't have helped stop you from killing them all," Tony grumbles.

"There's good people too, though, and while occasionally annoying… there's a balance." Loki nuzzles the back of Tony's neck. "You're being hailed a hero in some circles, an icon of change."

Well, Tony can't say he doesn't like that.

"And on Asgard… my interaction with Odin is still strained. I… I honestly do not know what you want for me to tell you."

"Gee, I don't know, maybe what's expected of me? I've never been there, I know barely anything about the society or the people there, and some of what I know isn't very encouraging, and now I'm expected to go there and bring my baby daughter – knowing what shit Odin's done to your other children? Jesus fuck, Loki, just tell me something!"

Loki's grip around Tony's waist tightens. His voice is strained, bitter, when he speaks. "He won't… he won't do anything to her. He's never done anything to infants – actually he generally waited until my children were vaguely of age. Besides, he gave his word and I have reason to believe that he won't do anything to her, even if he one day should have reason to fear her."

Frowning, Tony tries to make sense of that. "Why should he, and how do you know? How can you, of all people, be so sure of that now?"

"I spoke with him about it," Loki reveals.

Uh-oh. "Were threats involved?"

"A bit. Naturally. But… I believe it helped us understand each other better." Loki presses his forehead against the back of Tony's head. "He knows the stakes now, as do I. And it appears that he understood some things. As did I."

Yeah, there are few ways for Loki to sound more mysterious, but at least he's told Tony something.

"So she'll be perfectly, a hundred percent, completely fine when we go there on Monday."

"Yes."

Breathing a sigh of relief, Tony feels himself unwind a little. He'd been really worried about that. He leans back into Loki a little and blinks in surprise when Loki says hesitantly, "I apologize. I should have told you sooner. I'm not used to…"

"To somebody else freaking out about the same thing you're freaking out about?" Tony finishes.

"I don't… yes. Sigyn and I had no reason to worry until it was too late, and Angrboða and I were too sure that we'd be safe in Svartalfheim." Loki's voice is understandably bitter. "I won't make that mistake again."

It's as good as a promise that Loki has taken measures to ensure baby girl will be safe. Tony suspects some spells might be involved, but he honestly would rather not know.

They're quiet for a moment, playing with baby girl. She's already a lot more active than she was at the beginning, Tony finds; he's quite surprised. He would have thought she wouldn't do much more than sleep, poop and scream in the first couple of months, but he already finds that she's a lot more interesting than that. She grabs his fingers and refuses to let go, flails, puts her fingers in her mouth, reacts to voices and moods, and Tony can already tell very quickly when she doesn't like something.

"So," Tony says eventually when he figures enough time has passed. "What's going to happen on Monday? I seem to remember something about Odin wanting to come down to pick us up – please tell me that's not really going to happen."

"I'm afraid I can't do that. The Allfather and mother are going to come down for a visit in the morning, and around midday we will all leave for Asgard. The feast will begin in the late afternoon."

Well, that's finally some concrete information. "And what exactly will we do on Asgard? Before the feast, or after, or what? And what about the fact that no mortals are allowed on Asgard?"

"Officially, the Avengers now hold the status of Midgardian diplomats and heroes," Loki tells him, sounding a little amused."As for your mortality… you still have an apple to eat."

Oh, right, Tony completely forgot about that. "Well, give it to me then."

Loki sits up abruptly. "Now?"

Surprised by Loki's sharp voice, Tony sits up as well, butting baby girl between them just in case she suddenly discovers her ability to roll or crawl and fall off the bed while his back is turned. "Yeah? Is there a problem?"

Loki stares at him for a moment. "…no." He makes a gesture where he pulls his hands apart, palms gliding over each other, and suddenly he's holding a golden apple. He offers it to Tony.

A little wary because of Loki's reaction, Tony takes it. It smells fruity and ripe, but not overly so. The skin feels perfectly normal when Tony licks it and tastes faintly sweet. Glancing at Loki who is watching him closely with a blank expression, Tony takes a bite.

It's an apple. A golden one, yeah, and it's tastier somehow, but it's still an apple, and fairly anti-climatic. Feeling a bit ridiculous under Loki's intense scrutiny, Tony chews and swallows.

And waits. Nothing happens.

He raises an eyebrow at Loki, who raises an eyebrow back at him. Okay then. Tony unceremoniously eats the rest of the apple – all of it, because when Tony pauses Loki narrows his eyes at him. The core bit doesn't taste too great but whatever.

"So… is anything going to happen?" Tony asks once the apple is gone.

"You probably won't feel greatly different," Loki explains. "You're too young."

"…okay. And what's going to happen that I don't feel?" Maybe he should've asked that before eating the thing. Oh well.

Loki raises an eyebrow. "You will heal considerably faster. You won't grow old. You will tire less easily."

"Will I suddenly be super strong? Acquire magic abilities? Anything flashy?"

That earns him a look. "No."

"Aww, too bad." Tony pushes his lower lip forwards.

With an epic eye roll, Loki picks baby girl up and gets off the bed. "It's time for lunch."

"Hey, wait!" Tony scrambles to follow Loki. "Does this mean I'm the only one who can attend the feast? What does the change in status for the others mean?"

"It means Steve and Natasha, due to their being her godparents, are allowed onto Asgard for the duration of the feast," Loki informs him. "I am very much looking forwards to the meeting between Lady Sif and Natasha."

Lady Sif… "I think Thor mentioned her before… she's some sort of friend of his, right?"

"She is one of Asgard's very few lady warriors," Loki says just as they enter the kitchen.

"Ah!" Thor perks up. "You are speaking of Lady Sif!"

"Indeed we are. I just told Tony that I'm looking forward to her meeting Natasha." Loki sits down on the sofa while Tony boils water for baby girl's formula and checks on the status of the food Steve and Clint are in the last stages of making.

"Why?" Natasha asks with a frown. That frown and the dangerous tilt to her head is the only reason Tony doesn't say any of the lecherous things that go through his head.

"Because Lady Sif is very used to being the only female warrior," Loki replies, making it clear that it's about Sif, not Natasha. Tony doesn't know any history of Loki and Thor's friends in detail, but he knows that it's generally not good.

Thor tilts his head. "It shall be an interesting meeting."

"When am I supposed to be meeting this Lady, then?" Natasha asks, one eyebrow raised.

"You didn't tell them? Geeze." Tony rolls his eyes. "You and Steve are allowed to attend the feast because you're baby girl's godparents."

"Oh," Steve says, looking up from where he's draining the potatoes with a nervous expression. "Are we supposed to do anything?"

"Just eat a lot," Loki says dryly.

"You shall have a great time," Thor declares. "We shall feast and drink and tell stories 'til morn!"

That doesn't seem to ease Steve much.

Loki sighs. "There is no need to worry. You are foreigners and not expected to behave as they do. Besides, you are under mine and, more meaningfully, Thor's protection. As long as you are respectful to the Allfather and the Queen and don't steal anything you should be fine."

"Okay." Steve bites his lip, putting a bowl with cauliflower on the table. "If you're sure…?"

"Steve, honestly, you are the last person who's going to cause a diplomatic incident," Tony points out with exasperation. He hands the bottle of formula over to Loki, who starts feeding baby girl.

"Definitely," Natasha agrees. "We should be more worried about Tony."

"He's safe," Loki says.

"Yes, as Loki's spouse he is an associate of the royal family," Thor agrees.

Everybody blinks at that, Tony most of all. "Whoa, we're not married, I'm nobody's spouse."

Thor raises an eyebrow. "You have a child together. You are joined for life."

"On that note, don't sleep with Sigyn," Loki pipes up.

"Now why would I do that?" Tony asks dubiously, ignoring Steve coughing. "Is she that hot?"

Loki tilts his head. "Perhaps. She is... emotionally attached to me still."

"I thought you broke up like, hundreds of years ago." Tony is very aware of the fact that everybody is making a point of being busy handing out food, trying not to look like they're listening as closely as they are.

"We did have two sons together," Loki points out very calmly. "Furthermore, if it weren't for her I might still be tied to a boulder while a snake drips poison into my eyes."

Well. At least he left out the detail of what they used to tie him to that boulder.

Tony grimaces. "Lovely." At least it's not like he didn't expect he'd have to deal with centuries of history and Norse drama. "So basically you're saying there might be some jealousy drama, in the course of which she'll try to seduce me."

"No." Loki frowns. "Not jealousy. She has never quite recovered. Sometimes she tries to recapture it by getting close to me, but it only leaves her worse later. I don't want to talk about this any more."

Yeah. Sigyn isn't the only one who has never quite recovered. Tony bites his lower lip and tries to think of a change of topic; thankfully Natasha comes to his rescue when he isn't fast enough.

"When is the feast? When are we leaving?" she wants to know.

"Monday. Heimdall will pick you up in the afternoon," Loki replies. "Between two and three."

She nods. "Good. Then we can have our party on Saturday."

Tony looks up at that. "Tomorrow? Isn't that a bit sudden?"

"The only people coming, apart from us, are Jane, Pepper and Phil," Bruce points out.

"Jane? I thought she's in Hawaii right now?" Pepper and Phil, Tony had known about them coming, but they're busy people and this seems very last-minute.

"My beautiful Jane is coming back for the week-end," Thor announces proudly. "She wishes to meet my niece."

"You could've said, I would've lent her the jet to fly her in." Tony tilts his head. "Wait, have you been planning this?"

"Not much planning involved," Clint points out. "Phil and Pepper live here and Jane was coming anyway."

"She arranged for her return as soon as news of the birth reached her," Thor adds.

"And the rest…" Clint shrugs. "Food is easy, presents are taken care of. Not much else to do."

"I'm baking a cake," Steve announces with an air of determination. "I've seen pictures of baby shower cakes and I'm going to make one. She's going to have the best cake in the world."

Tony can't suppress a wide smile at that. "Awesome." It makes him happy how involved the rest of the team is with baby girl.

"So we're going grocery shopping after lunch," Natasha announces.

"Fuck yeah!" Clint reaches across the table for a fist bump that everybody joins in on, even Loki.

The rest of the day Tony and Loki keep being ushered out of rooms; apparently the exact details of the party are supposed to be a surprise. Tony is fairly sure that isn't part of tradition and just their friends enjoying the opportunity of chasing them out and being secretive. They know perfectly well that both Loki and Tony are inherently curious, but even Jarvis is in on the whole thing so they have no chance to outsmart the others. In the end Tony and Loki go to the workshop to pout and play

After – unwisely, he has to admit – checking out what's going on online Tony makes the decision that they need a family outing. His PR guy agrees that their going out in public is exactly what they need, so Tony decides that he and Loki are going to be the ones to pick Jane up at the airport. Thor seems a bit bummed about the idea but not too heartbroken – after Loki has pushed some of his buttons of Loki and Jane bonding. Their relationship has improved somewhat over time but they're still a bit cautious around each other. Thor has been trying to encourage them to get along better from the beginning, but there's only so much he can do with Loki being not overly interested. All in all, Tony's relationship with Jane is more affectionate than Loki and hers. She's a sweet girl who doesn't take any crap and the crush she has on his brain is adorable. At first she'd been a bit awkward with Tony's quick wit and flirting, not to mention the celebrity status, but she'd gotten used to it.

That's why the next morning, Loki, Tony and baby girl get into a limo and Happy drives them to the airport. They decide that Loki should be the one to carry baby girl, partly because Tony's already had his fifteen minutes of fame carrying her in a sling and partly because carrying a baby will considerably disarm the remains of Loki's villain image. Also, though Tony doesn't mention this, if Tony will be the one to greet Jane first and if there will be no obligation to hug Loki because there'll be a baby in the way it'll be considerably less awkward for everyone involved.

Of course, as soon as they step out onto the airport people whip out their camera phones and take pictures and amateur videos of them. Tony is well used to it and Loki ignores it with an elegant, casual disdain that's quite sexy actually. Nobody crowds them yet, but Happy follows them a couple of steps behind nevertheless, just in case.

Within ten minutes of their arrival at the terminal, the real paparazzi show up. Tony and Loki stand together, heads tilted towards each other as they speculate about the party. Loki keeps one hand on baby girl's back at all times; she's deeply asleep, seemingly completely content snuggled into Loki's chest.

"Hey," Tony says when he spots Jane, grinning and waving at her. She waves back, grinning widely as well, eyes flicking back and forth between Tony and Loki as Tony walks up to the barrier.

"Hi!" she beams once she reaches him. She tries to go for a handshake but Tony is having none of that, pulling her into a brief hug.

"Hey sweetheart, how was the flight?"

"Tiring." She blows her fringe out of her forehead.

"I gotta admit, I'm a bit hurt you chose to fly commercially," Tony tells her, taking her bag from her and walking her over to Loki. "Also, ignore the paparazzi."

She's spared from having to reply by Loki, who smiles at her – a small smile only, but an honest one.

"Hey," she says, a bit breathless, glancing at baby girl.

"Hello Jane," Loki replies, taking her hand and kissing it. "I trust you are well?"

"Yes, thank you, you?" She fumbles a little, eyes flicking towards the paparazzi. Tony puts a hand on her back and shields her a bit from the lenses. Yeah, they checked with her whether she's okay with this, but she nevertheless isn't used to it.

"I am well." Loki eyes her for a bit, clearly amused at her nervousness, but eventually takes pity on her. "Would you allow me to introduce you to our daughter?"

"Yes." She smiles at them. "Thor's been talking about little else."

"Well then." Loki pulls the cloth away from baby girl's face and leans towards Jane, one hand protectively cupped around baby girl's head. "This is baby girl of no name yet."

"None?" Jane asks, leaning in and peering at her. She looks utterly delighted, it makes Tony smile. "Not even a last name? I mean I know about the part where she doesn't get a name until she's a week old, but last names aren't part of that, right?"

Loki glances at Tony. "We have not yet reached an agreement. Lokadóttir would be the most logical option, but tradition on Midgard is for the child to take on the father's last name."

"Which is problematic, because which one – Odinsson or Laufeyson?" Tony continues.

"Though considering that we are unwed by Midgardian law, her last name should be Stark," Loki explains.

"Or Tonydóttir," Tony adds. "I quite like that one actually, it's an elegant union of Midgardian and Asgardian tradition."

"You only say that because it was your idea," Loki says. "It's not even grammatically correct. It should be Tonadóttir, or even Anthonadóttir."

"Well, no matter which, it's a good one," Tony fires back before turning to Jane. "As you can tell, it's complicated."

"Yes, I can see that," she says, amused.

"Do you have an opinion?" Loki asks her, which is a bit mean.

"I think I'm going to be Switzerland in this," Jane returns dryly.

"Sir," Happy says respectfully, having walked up to them. "I think it would be best if we left."

Tony blinks and looks around; they're surrounded by a nice circle of paparazzi and gawkers, and it's getting more by the minute. "Yeah, good idea."

Happy takes the lead and Tony and Jane flank Loki. It takes a bit to weave their way through the crowd and of course people call out to them, but Tony only has to say something once. Reminding them of the baby's presence serves to quiet them for long enough for them to make it through the thick of it, and then the only ones around them are the paparazzi that follow them.

Still, they all breathe a sigh of relief when they make it into the car. Tony makes a mental note to establish some rules about stalking him – it's not like there's anything he can do about it, but if anyone ever crowds him again when he has his baby daughter with him he'll never show his face with her in public again. Next time he'll make sure they're on some sort of private property where paparazzi aren't allowed to traverse freely and where the owners will try to ensure his privacy so he'll come back again.

They make some small talk with Jane on the way back, mostly about the observatory in Hawaii and a bit about the party – she knows as much as they do, but agrees with Tony's assessment that the others are making a secret out of it mostly because they can and not because they're planning a huge surprise.

Once they've safely arrived in the tower and Thor has elaborately greeted Jane (the two are incredibly mushy, it makes Tony feel worlds better about him and Loki because even if they're a quote internet cute little family unquote they at least don't practice adorable puppy love) they settle in baby girl's room, because Loki and Tony are now banned from the kitchen as well as the living room. Thor reluctantly takes his leave – apparently Coulson is showing Steve how to make awesome cake and Thor for some reason wants to learn as well.

"Do you want to feed her?" Loki offers Jane completely out of the blue. Both Tony and Jane are caught off-guard; so far, nobody else was allowed to feed baby girl when Tony and Loki weren't otherwise occupied, which has happened maybe three times so far. Tony doesn't know if Jane is aware of this, but he is fairly sure Thor must at least have told her that Loki is rather cagey about letting other people hold her.

"I'd love to," she says, clearly flattered.

"Hey," Steve exclaims in surprise when he enters the room ten minutes later. "Hey! I mean, hi Jane, I'm happy to see you."

"Hey Steve," Jane replies happily. "How's the cake coming along?"

"Wait, I have to take a picture of this – if you don't mind?" When she negates Steve digs his camera out of his back pocket and takes a picture of her feeding baby girl and one of Tony and Loki for good measure as well. Tony has the vague suspicion that Steve has documented the party preparation very well too.

"Okay. Thank you. Sorry about that, I'm just planning to make an album of her first party," Steve apologizes, leaning in to kiss Jane on the cheek as a greeting. "How are you?"

"It's no problem. A bit tired, but good – and you?"

And another round of small talk. Tony can schmooze with the best of them, but that's generally with an increasing level of blood alcohol, and now he's getting a bit bored.

"So, party," he eventually rudely interrupts Steve and Jane's discussion of icing flavors. "When?"

"Ah." Steve glances at the clock. "Potato salad and bockwurst in about half an hour, and then we thought we'd start once she wakes up from her nap?"

"Okay, cool." Enough time for a little catnap. Tony curls up in his corner of the sofa – Loki insisted on sitting next to Jane to have a good eye on baby girl – and buries his face in Loki's belly. They hadn't gotten much sleep last night, and not merely because baby girl wakes them up roughly every two to three hours. Luckily, Tony has recently gained the ability to nap nearly anywhere, anytime, with his eyes open if necessary.

Loki wakes him up for lunch; miraculously, they're let back into the kitchen for that. It looks as usual, except Tony is forbidden from opening any cupboards. Coulson is there as well, and miraculously, he isn't wearing a suit – Tony doesn't think he's ever seen him this casual. Sure, he's not wearing jeans, but he is wearing a t-shirt. It's not even Captain America themed.

After they've eaten everybody wanders off into their respective bedrooms (though Tony doesn't keep a too close eye on noting which room Coulson ends up in). Tony and Loki use the opportunity for- well it was technically supposed to be a good nap kiss but that's not what it ends up being. Though they do have a nap afterwards.

When they wake up it's around three in the afternoon. Baby girl is still asleep so they take their time in the shower and try to have afternoon coffee.

Try being the pivotal word, because Clint refuses to let them into the kitchen.

"You're kidding me," Tony growls. "Really?"

"Really." Clint crosses his arms.

"I think this is going a bit far," Loki says, unimpressed.

Clint shakes his head. "No can do. They'll kill me if I let you in and you see the cake."

"Well then, go make us coffee," Tony orders. When Clint hesitates he narrows his eyes. "It's either that, or let me in." Coffee. Tony's been barred from it for months upon months; he's not overdoing it now but he certainly is not restraining himself anymore.

With a scowl, Clint throws his hands up in the air."Fine! Wait here."

Tony and Loki share a look after he's vanished into the kitchen, pointedly closing the door after himself. "This is getting a bit ridiculous," Tony opines.

"Small minds need their entertainments," Loki replies philosophically. It at least makes Tony laugh.

Clint brings them coffee on a tray like a barista; he's even made hearts into the milk foam. "We're gonna need formula for baby girl soon," Tony warns.

"Just say the word," Clint says unperturbed. And indeed, when baby girl wakes up ten minutes later he vanishes back into the kitchen without complaint and returns with the formula. "Half an hour, then we're meeting all in the living room," he tells them.

Awesome.

While Loki is feeding baby girl Jarvis alerts them to Pepper's arrival, so Tony picks her up to complain about all the secretive behavior. She's wearing casual clothes as well – well, as casual as Pepper ever gets, she always likes dressing well – reminding Tony how long it's been since they met up in private. "Nice dress, by the way," Tony says once he's complained about everything.

She smiles dryly. "Thanks. It was your apology present to me last year."

"What did I do last year? And how come I always give you dresses?"

"The Russian diplomat's wife?" Pepper prompts, scowling at him. "Honestly, you nearly caused a diplomatic incident, I had to clean up after you for weeks afterwards and this only in my capacity as Stark Industries' CEO. Seriously, Tony."

And, yeah, now he remembers.

"To what incident are you referring?" Loki asks delicately.

Uh-oh. "Er, I got a bit drunk and hit a bit on some woman. Her husband took exception." Tony grimaces when Loki raises an eyebrow at him, looking amused. "That was after the… hum, we had a discussion about the killing of other people." And the willful destruction of property, genocide and whether or not Tony had any ground to stand on in that sort of argument.

Loki raises an eyebrow, clearly remembering. It had been one of their more epic fights – actually it's in the top two, with only the one about respecting the Avengers/respecting Loki's account of his past in spite of whatever Thor might have said ranking higher – and it had resulted in some very brilliant make-up sex, once they had deigned to speak to each other again two weeks after the fact. But in between they both had fallen back on their old, self-destructive behavior patterns.

"I didn't start anything, did I?" Pepper asks with a worried frown. When Tony looks at her quizzically, she elaborates, "Should I not have mentioned her?"

"We never explicitly stated we'd be monogamous," Loki replies. "Though now that you mention it, I'd like to make the stipulation that if one of us is going to sleep with somebody else, they have to let the other know beforehand." He frowns. "I do not like being caught off-guard."

"Yeah, that's cool with me," Tony consents. Actually he's pretty happy with that arrangement – he hasn't felt tempted lately, but then he hasn't had much opportunity either. Once he'd been in a relationship where the woman he'd been with had demanded that he ask her permission first; that hadn't really worked out in the end. Tony doesn't do well with restraints.

"Did you seriously never talk about this before?" Pepper asks incredulously.

Tony eyes her, a little annoyed with the judgmental undertone. "There never was the need, was there?" People often judge him for having a loose sex life, and when it's strangers Tony generally doesn't give a fuck but when it's people who should know better… well.

"Of course." She puts a hand on Tony's arm. "I didn't mean it like that."

"How did you mean it, then?" Tony raises one eyebrow. "Wait, let me guess. You meant it in the sense that I can't have a functioning relationship." Because that is the thing people who know him better judge him for generally. Her wince proves him right, and he doesn't give her time to protest. "Well, guess what, believe it or not, I am in a functioning relationship. And maybe we're not the way people think we should be with the love declarations and all the rest, but it works for us and that's the only thing that matters."

As a support, Loki presses his leg against Tony's but keeps otherwise silent, feeding baby girl.

Pepper grimaces. "I know that, Tony. I'm sorry, I didn't mean it like that. Honestly, I'm glad this is working out for you. I'm glad you're happy. But you know me, I have a hard time comprehending how it doesn't drive you crazy not to have a plan and clear rules."

Tony actually does know that. While Pepper certainly has a sense for adventure and thrives under pressure (she wouldn't have stayed working for Tony so long if she didn't), too much of it and she snaps. It's one of the reasons they didn't work out – stress in her professional life is all good and well, but with Tony her private life was just as unpredictable and she hadn't coped with that well, especially once the Avengers thing happened.

"I find rules stifling," Loki involves himself calmly.

Tony points at him. "Yes! Exactly. Gotta stay flexible, darling." He's offer a fist bump but Loki's got his hands full, and anyways Loki generally isn't too indulgent of Tony's, as Loki sees it, more childish behaviorisms. Clint is generally Tony's fist bump buddy.

Pepper laughs. "Sounds horrible to me, but I'm glad you're so compatible."

Whatever. Tony and Loki share a look, then Loki raises an eyebrow. When Tony blinks Loki eyes the cloth they use to put over their shoulders when they have baby girl burp.

Ah. Tony takes the cloth, puts it over his shoulder and takes baby girl when Loki hands her over. While Tony pats her gently on her back Loki leaves, leaving Pepper and Tony alone. Tony at first doesn't get why but Loki must've picked up something, because as soon as he closes the door after himself Pepper bites her lower lip.

Tony raises his eyebrow at her. "What is it?"

"Are you happy?" She asks straight-forwardly.

Tony blinks. "…where is this coming from?"

"It's just…" Pepper sighs. "This really, really is not where I would have pictured you one year ago. At all. Neither with Loki, nor in a stable relationship, and certainly not with a baby. You always said you don't want children."

"I didn't," Tony admits freely. "I still doubt my fitness to be a parent. But it happened and I'm dealing." He pulls baby girl away from his shoulder, wipes her mouth clean and then settles her on his chest, where she starts mouthing at the cloth above his arc reactor. "I'm doing my best here, Pepper. I know I'm not the type but things rarely go according to plan for me, so I do what I always do: adapt."

"And thrive," she adds with a soft smile. "You always thrive in some way."

"Seriously?" Tony raises an eyebrow. "Usually you're all "your life is a mess Tony stop drinking"."

Pepper starts frowning. "That's just- and you did stop drinking, and you're doing better for it, and I- Tony. Do you really think I think that badly of you?"

"Nah." Tony shrugs. "You can't have, you did get into a relationship with me and I've never taken you for being overly masochistic." Though she does have the helper syndrome where he's concerned.

It doesn't stop her from frowning, though. "I'm not. Just, generally you don't give the impression of thinking particularly bad about yourself. Though I do know better, it's hard to talk to you about that sort of thing. Usually you run away."

"Nowhere to run to right now, I'm barred from anywhere," Tony says dryly. "Though I would appreciate if we talked about something else. How's the company?"

"Fine. Read the weekly status reports I send you. And for the record: I never thought badly of you. You had – and still have – some self-destructive habits I'm not particularly fond of, but I always knew that you're great. And I'm not referring to your achievements, your intellect or the size of your penis," she adds dryly, derailing any joke Tony might've made to derail the sentimentality.

"Uh," he says thus, pulling baby girls white socks up. Good thing they didn't put her in one of these footie playsuits or he'd have nothing to distract himself with. The one she's wearing right now is red with white polka dots, which is cute enough even without the feet, Tony figures. "Thanks."

Pepper huffs. "And don't think I didn't notice how you didn't say anything about Loki."

Well, that's at least a little easier to talk about. "Nothing to say about him. He's gorgeous, entertaining and smart. What's not to like?"

"I don't know him that well personally," Pepper says, "but from what I can tell he's impulsive, unpredictable and has a ton of issues from his past."

Tony raises an eyebrow at her. Seriously? "Sound like anybody else you know?"

She rolls her eyes. "Yes, yes, I know." Her expression turns thoughtful. "You know, I used to think you'd need someone to ground you. Only I clearly had the complete wrong idea of who that might be."

That sounds oddly specific. "Who did you think it should be?"

"Well, at one time I obviously thought it would be me."

Tony eyes her. "Quit stalling, spit it out. You were thinking of somebody."

"Well… sometimes you and Steve act like an old married couple," Pepper says.

That's not entirely unexpected, really – Tony is aware of what goes on online, thank you very much. There are places where pictures of Tony and Steve just looking at each other (much less smiling or touching each other) are very, very popular. It's pretty entertaining, really.

When it's not one of his oldest friends telling him that she'd rather have him dating Steve than Loki. "I can see where you're coming from, and I'm flattered, really, Steve is pretty hot. Maybe we would have, eventually, but… Loki." Besides, Tony has no idea where Steve stands on the whole thing. He's fairly sure they're not perfectly compatible on the sex front.

She smiles at him. "Yes, I gathered. And if that's what you need and what you're happy with, then I'm happy for you."

Great. Moving on… "Can we talk about something else now? Because otherwise I'm going to start asking about Natasha."

Pepper flushes. "Not much to talk about. We enjoy each other's company, that's all."

"Right." Tony grins lecherously but doesn't say anything else when she narrows her eyes at him.

Someone knocks on the door. "Tony? You can come in now."

And just when the conversation started to become interesting. "About time!" Tony calls out, adjusting his hold on baby girl before getting up.

Steve opens the door and pokes his head in. "Is she okay?"

"You know Pepper, she always is," Tony jokes, earning himself a growl from Pepper and an eyeroll from Steve.

The living room turns out to be none too exciting. It's decorated with garlands and stuff but nothing spectacular. It is, however, filled with their friends – even a surprise one. "Rhodey!"

"Yo, Tony!" Rhodey spreads his arms.

Tony unceremoniously hands baby girl over to Loki and goes in for a big hug. It's been two months since he last saw Rhodey; before he'd been stationed in secret-location-Tony-isn't-supposed-to-know-about aka not-so-secret-base in Afghanistan.

"You lost weight," Rhodey jokes when they pull apart.

"Asshole, I'd like to see you hatch a small human," Tony fires back, making Rhodey grin.

"And there she is," Rhodey coos as soon as he spots her, abandoning Tony for baby girl in Loki's arms. "Hello little princess."

Unexpectedly helpful, Loki turns her around so Rhodey can look at her properly.

"And look at you! You're even prettier than in the pictures your lame daddy sent me when he finally remembered I exist."

Tony huffs. "I already apologized for not telling you about the birth immediately. Excuse me for having been otherwise occupied at the time."

"I'm in a warzone and I manage to talk to you more frequently than you do," Rhodey returns.

They bicker back and forth for a while; pretty early in Loki wanders off after handing baby girl over to Tony. Tony really missed Rhodey – they're still very good friends, have been for way too long to be anything else by this point. Their lives have changed a lot over the past couple of years and their relationship consequently has as well, but they still get along as easily as they used to.

Steve comes along at one point, first taking photos and then joining in on their conversation; he gets along great with Rhodey as well. It's a brothers-in-arms thing Tony will probably never really understand – or so they say. Eventually Tony gets a bit bored and wanders off, picking out Natasha from the crowd because she's standing a little off, watching the formation of groups and the ebb and flow of about four different conversations.

"Hey."

She smiles at him and especially baby girl. His daughter is a serious attention drawer already, and all she does is look adorable and drool. "Enjoying the party?"

Tony shrugs. "Yeah. How did you manage to get Rhodey here? I thought he was supposed to be away for at least another month."

"Phil," is all Natasha says as if that explains everything – which it does, really.

"Nice. Wanna hold her for a bit? She's heavier than she looks." It's only half of a lie; it does get tiring holding her for so long, but it's not really a chore.

Natasha clearly sees through him, but she still happily takes the baby. Tony stays with her for a bit but then Jane and Bruce, who've been involved in a conversation, start to talk more animatedly and Tony knows these expressions. And there's rarely been a science discussion Tony could stay away from, at least not one involving Bruce and Jane. Pretty quickly he joins them and immediately delves into an intense discussion of the physics of space travel. They only come up when Steve calls them over.

"It's time for cake," he says. For some reason he, Clint and Rhodey look amused; Clint whispers something into Rhodey's ear and the two of them giggle.

Tony decides not to ask.

They all sit around the big table that's already been set, and Steve films while Phil brings in the cake. At first he tries to protest, demurring that Steve made it, but Steve insists that Phil did most of the work and that without him, it would certainly not have turned out so nicely. Flushing happily (he's never really gotten over that fanboy crush he has on Steve) Phil gives in.

And the cake certainly deserves the ceremony. It's round with three tiers, and each tier is coated with a different color of icing; the bottom is yellow, the middle one is purple and the top one is covered in green, red and gold stripes. The two bottom tiers are covered in symbols of cut-out icing, and the top tier is crowned by a candle.

Everybody applauds and cheers as Phil sets the cake down. Tony's never been one for baking or cooking, but he can recognize the effort that went into this, especially considering that nobody here is a confectioner.

"That is an awesome cake," he states, honestly impressed.

"It is," Steve agrees proudly. "I helped baking but really, all the impressive bits are Phil's doing."

"You did a bit more than just help bake," Phil protests.

"Yeah, he also almost ate all the cream filling," Clint laughs.

"I did not! Only the leftovers!"

"Do all the symbols have meaning?" Loki interrupts before they can start throwing wadded up paper towels at each other, which, with as soon as Clint and paper towels are in the same room, is always just a moment away. "I can figure out the icing colors and of course, the hammers, but what about the rest?"

"Oooh, what have you figured out?" Clint asks eagerly.

"There is symbolism involved?" Tony asks disbelievingly at the same time. Holy shit, there was even more effort involved than he previously had thought.

"Obviously." Loki raises an eyebrow at him. "The hammers are self-evident, and you should be able to figure out the colors as well." His expression says I will be very disappointed if you don't.

Tony didn't even recognize that the black things were supposed to be hammers, though now that Loki has pointed it out it seems obvious. "The purple is obviously Clint." It's Clint's favorite color. "Green is Loki, red is me, gold is both of us."

"Gold is baby girl," Bruce corrects.

"Right." The color they have in common stands for baby girl, who comes from both of them. Makes sense, and Tony suspects Phil is behind it – it's sort of poetic, which is Phil's forte. "The yellow, I'm really not sure."

"The yellow is difficult," Steve admits. "I'm actually very surprised Loki figured it out."

"I have theories about the symbols," Loki explains. "Though I'm really not sure which symbol belongs to whom."

"Those are difficult as well," Steve agrees.

"Don't leave me hanging, guys, tell me. Who's yellow?" Tony asks, getting impatient.

Bruce raises a hand, looking amused. "Me."

"Okay. The hammers are Thor. The stars are Phil. What about the rest?" Tony looks around the table.

"How did you figure out the stars are Phil and not Steve?" Clint asks, brow furrowed.

"Steve is a walking cliché, I admit," Tony teases, "But that would've been a bit too obvious even for him."

Steve rolls his eyes. "Thank you."

"Who are the butterflies?" Loki asks, leaning forwards to examine the cake more closely, mindful of baby girl in his arms.

Rhodey raises his hand. "Me, though I didn't make them."

"I made them for him," Clint adds.

"The fishes are me," Natasha explains.

"I'm the suns," Pepper says.

"I'm the flowers," Steve volunteers.

"The polka dots," Jane says.

"That's all of them, then," Tony concludes. Knowing that everybody had their hand in the decoration makes it even more awesome, really. Looking up, he grins at all of them. "Cool."

With a wide grin, Clint turns to Phil. "Can I now? Can I?"

Phil sighs. "You may."

Throwing both arms in the air, Clint exclaims, "It's the Avengers union cake!"

"Well done," Natasha says dryly.

"It is a lovely cake," Loki states.

Tony nods empathically in agreement. "Yeah. Can we eat it?"

"Photos first," Steve says decisively. And so they all group together behind the cake for an awkward group picture. Steve has a thing for those, they've all had to realize ever since Steve got the camera.

After that's taken care of, Tony gets to cut the cake. The top tier is vanilla sponge with two layers of raspberry; the middle cake is chocolate sponge with two hazelnut paste layers and the bottom tier is lemon sponge with two layers of strawberry. Tony remains impressed at the effort that must have gone into all this – and it's delicious as well.

After everbody's had a piece of each tier – some preferring smaller pieces than others, but that's common occurrence in Avengers tower – they make a round of coffee/espresso and settle down in the sitting area. Rhodey finally gets to hold baby girl and ask Tony all the horribly awkward, embarrassing questions people apparently ask new parents. For a while baby girl seems happy with Rhodey but eventually she gets a bit restless; Tony figures she's been awake for way too long. Rhodey at first doesn't notice but then baby girl starts to sniffle and affects her epic pout, by which point he gets terribly nervous and hands her back over to Tony all too gladly.

When Tony returns the party has become considerably louder; Clint and Jane have taken out the xbox and are engaged in a fierce battle on the screen with the team split into even halves, cheering them on. Loki, who generally refrains from participating in such frivolous activities, is sitting in an armchair with a vaguely amused expression.

"Hey." Tony perches on the armrest of Loki's chair and leans into him. "The bird is in the nest."

"Really, Tony?" Tilting his head, Loki looks up at him. "The bird is in the nest?"

"Oh, shut up," Tony snaps playfully and, in order to prevent Loki from saying anything more, collapses his weight on top of him, making him yelp in surprise. As a result they end up squeezed tightly together, sharing the armchair that was originally meant only for one.

"You two are ridiculous," Pepper comments from the side, sounding indulgent. Loki makes an indignant face but keeps his scathing reply to himself when Tony, out of sight from Pepper, wriggles his hand between Loki's back and the backrest and slides it down to Loki's ass. He can't do much more than squeeze a little but that's more than good enough for him already. Loki has a really great ass.

"Oi!" Clint exclaims really loudly when Jane defeats him. She cheers loudly, throwing her hands in the air and high-fives Natasha. "Okay, who's next?"

"Tony!" Clint decides, a glint in his eyes.

Tony takes Loki's leg and puts it over his lab. "I can't I'm trapped."

Clint boos. "Laaaaame."

Widening his eyes, Tony tightens his grip on Loki's knee so he can't pull it away. "Not my fault."

Clint nags some more but Tony doesn't give in, preferring to take a break and just watch the others together with Loki. Often he's right in the middle of them, doing shit with Clint or making fun of him with Steve by pretending to be disappointed parents, but sometimes he just likes to watch. It's been years since they started to interact like a sort of family instead of a bunch of guys who were thrown together but sometimes Tony still marvels at it.

"Hey, what about the presents?" Bruce eventually says.

Tony perks up. "Presents? For baby girl? But she already has everything!"

"Yes." Steve sends him a dry look. "Which certainly didn't make it easy to find something good."

"In fact, you and Natasha are the only ones who have managed," Phil says dryly.

Steve tries to defer, clearly embarrassed, but Clint and Bruce vocally agree with Phil. Eventually Tony settles the debate by calling loudly for the presents, he wants to see them, there is no way to settle this until he has.

"I think we should wait for baby girl," Pepper says with a thoughtful frown. "The presents are for her, after all."

"It's not like she will be able to figure out what's going on," Tony replies, shrugging.

"I'd rather let her sleep, it was a bit much to process with all the people," Loki adds.

Pepper is appalled. "I wasn't suggesting we wake her up!"

"Well you can't keep me waiting for however long it will take for her to wake up again," Tony says decisively.

The others exchange a couple of looks, silently communicating, until Steve nods. Then everybody jumps up and scatters to get the presents.

"I do not understand this practice of giving presents upon the occasion of a new birth," Loki tells Tony once everybody's gone. At Tony's questioning look he elaborates, "It would make sense if the parents don't have the means to provide her with everything she needs, or if it were diplomatic, but this I don't understand."

"I think it is partly diplomatic, actually," Tony replies, lowering his voice because the others start to trickle back in.

Loki raises both eyebrows and watches Rhodey, Jane and Phil sit down, their presents in their laps. Steve and Natasha return next, carrying a square present. They all look pretty eager.

"I see what you mean," Loki says lowly while Thor, Pepper, Cllint and Bruce enter.

Tony leans in even closer, putting his lips to Loki's ear as he murmurs, "I think it's mostly because they're hella excited about her, though." He pats Loki's thigh, taking the opportunity to grope him a little, and jumps up, moving over to the loveseat because it'll have a little more space than the armchair. He waits until Loki has settled down next to him before he claps into his hands, rubbing them together as he meets the eager expressions of his friends. "Okay! Give it to me."

They share a look, then Rhodey leans forwards and hands his present over. Grinning giddily Tony indelicately rips the paper off, revealing an iron man plushie of roughly the same size as baby girl. Tony loves it.

"It's custom made," Rhodey says. "The ones I found were either too small or they had some electronic voice crap in them. I figured if anything, you'd want to put that in yourself."

Tony grins widely. "You got that straight, man. Thank you." He hands it over for Loki to examine and watches with amusement as Loki curiously turns it over, wriggling its arms and legs and turning its head.

"I think I need one of these," Loki says.

Clint snorts and Natasha starts to laugh; Steve flushes furiously which makes everybody titter.

"You have a dirty mind, capsicle!" Tony hoots. "He means so he can kill it when I piss him off, don't you?"

"Of course." Loki raises an eyebrow. "What else would I do with it?"

Tony wriggles his eyebrows suggestively and Loki wrinkles his nose, looking both scandalized and disgusted, at which point everybody loses it completely.

"Okay, okay, next one," Tony demands breathlessly when they've all calmed down a little.

Jane hands her present over and Tony, deciding to be fair, lets Loki unwrap it. He regrets this decision immediately because Loki takes his time, making sure not to rip the paper. He's definitely doing it just to tease Tony.

Finally Loki pulls the paper away to reveal a yellow blanket covered in tiny – half the size of Tony's thumb – Avengers. Powerpuff Avengers, clearly having been stitched on by hand.

Tony gapes. "Did you do that yourself?!"

"Well, yeah." Jane flushes. "Darcy helped. I figured you can buy anything you need anyway, so something self-made would probably be better." She points towards one corner. "You can see how bad I was at the beginning but by the end of it I was actually sort of decent." She points to the other and of the blanket.

"Decent?" Tony looks at it closely. "I don't really know much about this sort of thing but it looks pretty good to me."

"It is good," Loki comments quietly. It makes Jane flush even more.

"How many are there?" Tony asks quickly because Thor looks like he's about to burst with pride and possibly hug everyone. Loki wouldn't appreciate it, especially not in front of everybody. "Tell me or I'm going to count."

"Five of each, plus Phil, Rhodey, Pepper and me." She bites her lower lip. "That makes thirty-four."

Clearly she counted Loki as one of the Avengers. Tony doesn't comment on it but secretly it makes him quite happy; he's curious to know what Loki will say about that later. It's different when Tony does it.

"May I see?" Steve asks curiously. Tony immediately hands the blanket over and it makes the round, being examined and complimented by everybody. By the time it's returned back to Tony and Loki Jane's face has turned completely red and she keeps pointing out that Darcy helped. To appease her Tony takes a silly picture with his phone of him with the blanket and a thumb up, Loki in the background, and sends it to Darcy. Then, for good measure, he takes another picture, this time of just the blanket, and posts it on twitter, despite Jane's mortified flailing.

"Okay," Tony says, putting the phone away. "Next one?"

Thor, Bruce, Pepper and Clint share looks. Pepper eventually clears her throat. "Okay, we thought the same as Jane, that it'd be better if we make something ourselves."

"Except we all suck at everything," Clint states bluntly. "So we learned to knit."

Tony blinks. That doesn't seem like a logical progression to him.

"Not well though," Pepper takes over again. "So we apologize in advance. We did our best."

After another shared look, all four of them simultaneously hand their presents over. Tony takes them and hands two to Loki but doesn't start unwrapping yet. "So, let me get this straight. You learned to knit?" It's really, incredibly difficult to keep a straight face, especially not when he pictures each of them with delicate knitting needles.

Pepper rolls her eyes. "You're not the only one who can use youtube, you know. Now start unwrapping, you ass."

"Yes Ma'am." Giving a lazy salute, Tony bites his lower lip and starts ripping off the paper. In the time Loki has halfway unwrapped one, Tony has unwrapped both of his, revealing a purple knit hat and a tiny pair of light green knit socks. "Who made these?" Tony asks, examining them closely. He already suspected something like this when they said knitting, but he's still stunned that they made them themselves. The hat even has ears. And yeah, it's evident by the irregular patterns that the people who made them weren't too skilled, but that really doesn't matter.

"The shoes are me, the hat is Clint," Bruce says.

"I made the scarf," Thor adds, referring to the red scarf Loki just finished unwrapping.

"Cool," Tony says, honestly impressed. "Seriously, this is great." The last present reveals to be orange mittens on a braided string.

"I'm impressed," is all Loki says, but coming from him, that's more than enough.

"We made them a bit bigger because we figured she'd grow into them," Pepper explains, looking pleased.

"Also because fuck, knitting is difficult," Clint adds bluntly.

"Honestly, I'd never have the patience." Tony puts his fingers in the gloves and wriggles them. "Give me tiny machines to fuck around with any day, I can do that for hours, bit this?" He shakes his head. "Wow."

"I'm glad you appreciate it, because I'm never going to do anything like that again," Pepper says.

"I don't know," Bruce says thoughtfully. "I found it sort of calming once I got into it."

"You almost hulked out twice," Clint points out.

"That was before I got into it," Bruce returns.

While the two of them bicker, Tony and Loki examine the presents they got and arrange them on the loveseat next to them. Well, it's mostly Tony who does that part, mainly because it's a good excuse to squeeze up real tight to Loki again.

"So!" he eventually says, clapping into his hands. "Was that all?"

Pepper rolls her eyes. "You're such an asshole."

"I haven't knitted anything," Phil says, handing his square present over, "take this instead."

Tony grins and pulls the wrapping paper off. It's a children's book, but not any children's book – it's an old one of Captain America who explains why bullying is wrong. "It was my favorite book when I was young," Phil says, barely even blushing anymore to be referring to his persistent hero-crush on Steve in front of Steve.

"Mine too!" Tony says, taken completely off-guard. He had almost forgotten all about it. At one point before he had gone to MIT – so he could have at most been twelve – he had burnt most of his children's toys because he'd been completely fed up with the way his father would send him away with the words "go play with your toys". He'd never really thought about it enough to regret it.

"What, really?" Steve asks, sounding completely surprised.

Tony waves him away in favor of the book, opening it and leafing through the pages. This book is connected to some of the few memories of family moments he has; both his father and his mother would muster up enough patience every now and then to read it with him. Now he knows why, of course – they had both known and missed Steve – but at the time all it had been about to him was time spent with his parents.

"I don't understand," Loki says, thankfully pulling Tony out of his remembrance before he can turn bitter or maudlin. Tony is fairly sure he did that on purpose, Loki doesn't usually pretend to be stupid (actually, it's something he almost never does) and he's grateful. "Is this educational?"

"A bit," Tony replies, handing the book over. "It's education through entertainment. For some reason they used Cap a lot for that sort of thing." He winks at Steve, who ducks his head, flushing.

"And it is for infants," Loki states, curiously leafing through the pages.

"Yeah."

Loki has stopped at a page fairly close to the end, where Captain America holds a nice, short speech about how it's not right to be mean to anybody merely because of how someone looks, speaks, or where they're from. Tony eyes the page and Loki for a moment before putting a hand on Loki's thigh to pull him out of his thoughts. The others are looking at the two of them, but only Phil's expression says that he has an idea why Loki has turned so quiet.

Tony meets his eyes and smiles widely. "Thanks for this, it's awesome."

Phil's eyes are a little too understanding. "My pleasure."

"Our turn," Natasha says abruptly. She probably noticed that something is going on she isn't privy too – though who is Tony kidding, the others probably have as well.

Steve startles. "Oh! Right." But instead of handing the present he's holding over, he fingers it nervously, sharing a look with Natasha. "So, uhm. Like the others we thought we'd make something ourselves, and… well. Just. I hope you'll like it." He looks terribly nervous when he finally hands the present over.

Tony shares a look with Loki and unwraps the present with a little more temperance.

It's a photo album – or maybe a scrapbook, Tony can't quite tell the difference between either. It doesn't have a title or anything, it's just a deep Prussian blue cover. Glancing at Steve, who looks even more nervous now, Tony opens it.

It's mostly pictures of Tony and Loki – pictures Tony to ninety-five percent wasn't even aware existed. Some of them are clearly from security footage, which must mean Jarvis was involved in the making of this as well. Several of them are of him and Loki together, though it's mostly just sitting together or talking to each other, not many of them doing couble-y things. There are a couple of pictures of them individually and several of either of them with other people – and a great many of those are Tony sleeping on somebody. It would make Tony uncomfortable, the pictures where he's visibly pregnant, but the focus is clearly not on his belly.

In all of the pictures, everyone looks content. It's not overdone, they're not smiling all the time, but there are a couple of pictures where they are – most of them of the silly myspace self-portrait kind Tony likes to take. All in all, the photos span the past couple of months but, more importantly, they make them look like a family. The last three pages are pictures of people with baby girl, and the very last picture is the group picture they took just a couple of hours ago, of all of them with baby girl in front of the cake.

Tony doesn't know what to say, he really doesn't know, so he stares at the newest photo and says, "How did you manage that? It's been barely two hours."

"Jarvis," Steve says.

Of course.

Tony swallows. "Thank you."

Steve smiles. "Glad you like it."

There is an awkward silence during which Tony tries really, really hard not to start to babble because while there are few things he likes less than awkward silences, whatever would come out of his mouth now would be infinitely more embarrassing.

Thankfully, these people know him pretty well, so nobody expects an elaborate, emotional speech of thanks from him, and also they know to distract him when needed.

"Can I see?" Pepper asks.

"Sure." Tony hands the photo album over. "You haven't seen it yet? I got the impression you all collaborated on the presents."

"We discussed who would do what so we wouldn't overlap, but we didn't exactly show them around," she explains absently. Rhodey leans in close and looks over her shoulder.

Tony glances at Loki, who is looking thoughtful. He doesn't say anything, but Tony can tell that there's a lot going on with him. Tony presses his leg against Loki's and they wait in silence as the others look through the photos.

"I just thought she'd really like to look at this one day," Steve tells them at one point. "So she can see what you did during the pregnancy and just, well, pictures of her parents in general."

"It's a lovely idea," Loki replies. Tony knows Loki doesn't really see the point in photos and he also doesn't believe in being nice to people for the sake of being nice (though to be honest, neither does Tony), so he must have really liked this, either as a gesture or the album itself – or possibly both.

"I think we should start thinking about making dinner," Steve eventually says.

Tony grimaces. It'd a bit too insolent to wriggle his way out of having to participate in the making of that, not after the trouble everyone went through to make an awesome cake. "Pizza?"

Steve's mouth twists with amusement. "Fine."

Tony fistpumps, completely unsubtle, and calls their usual delivery service. While he's busy with that baby girl wakes up again and Loki leaves to collect her. It seems to be the official sign for everybody to break up a little; they all split up and go do their own thing – bathroom breaks, clearing up the living room a little, that sort of thing. Tony means to join Clint and Bruce and help do the dishes but Rhodey has stayed seated and is looking at him expectantly once Tony hangs up.

"What's up, man?" Tony asks, raising an eyebrow.

A wide grin starts to spread over Rhodey's face. "Nothing, Tones, just happy to see you happy." He kicks Tony in the shin. "I'm still not used to not having to worry about you."

Tony grimaces. "What is it with everybody getting all emotional today?"

Rolling his eyes like Tony is a complete idiot, Rhodey sighs. "Good to know you're still the Tony I know and love." He leans forward and fixates Tony with his eyes. "Think about it. You've been in a stable relationship for more than one and a half years. Most of your relationships had long started falling apart by the time you reached the one-year-mark. And as if that weren't enough, you just had a child. I don't pretend to understand how the hell that came about, but it doesn't matter, that's huge, Tony."

"I know that." Tony crosses his arms and stares at the ground.

Rhodey kicks him in the shin again. "Relax, we're done. No more talk about feelings." He wriggles his eyebrows. "Though let me tell you, it's not at all my cup of tea, but he does have really nice cheekbones."

Relaxing, Tony grins widely. "It's not just his cheekbones that are nice, buddy."

Completely unfazed, Rhodey shrugs. "Can't really say anything about that, but I trust you would know."

"I could tell you-"

"No!" Rhodey interrupts loudly. "No, thanks. Really." Then he pauses, narrows his eyes. "Though I am a little curious about the god part."

Tony laughs out loud. That's why he and Rhodey have been best friends for so long; Rhodey can go all tight-assed Marine on him when necessary but he isn't a dry, uptight asshole through and through.

He leans in and winks. "You shouldn't be asking about the god part, you should ask about the magic."

But Rhodey never gets to ask about the magic because Loki chooses that moment to return. That wouldn't bother Tony at all but he's carrying baby girl and Tony isn't going to discuss Loki's prowess in bed in front of their baby daughter.

Of course Loki notices that they've been involved in a somewhat private talk; he pauses halfway to the seating area and raises an eyebrow. "Want me to leave again?"

"Nah." Tony reaches out for baby girl. Loki hands her over and takes a closer look at the presents they received. "We can discuss this sometime else." He sends a sly look towards Rhodey, who smirks in response.

"I gotta go back, I only got a week-end pass, but when I get back we definitely have to go out for a beer."

Perfect. Tony needs to get out again; he's been cooped up inside for so long he barely knows what to do outside anymore. "Awesome. There's this new strip club I heard about, I've been meaning to check it out."

"What is a strip club?" Loki asks curiously, looking up from their presents.

"A sort of bar, except it's full of women – or men, depending on your tastes – who take their clothes off and dance at poles," Tony explains. "You'd like it." Come to think of it, Tony would quite like to see Loki doing the dancing – he has the body for it, lithe and graceful and very, very bendy.

"Taking clothes off, fine, but I do not know what you mean by 'dancing at poles'," Loki says.

Tony bites his lower lip. "We'll have to go soon. You'll see."

"Suddenly I have a lot less problems uniting my image of you with the image of a father in my head," Rhodey says, sounding amused.

Tony raises both eyebrows. "What is that supposed to mean?"

Rhodey waves it off. "Don't worry, I just never pictured you as the fatherly type. I'm glad to see that I was wrong, but I'm even happier to see that you're still fundamentally you. I had real problems imagining you as the type who has a curse jar or something."

"I'm not going to do any of the no cursing in front of children crap," Tony tells him seriously. "I think that's utter bullshit. They all learn to curse in kindergarten anyway, and all this fuss about not cursing in front of children makes it only all the more attractive for them." It certainly had for Tony, and everyone he knew, really.

Chuckling, Rhodey shakes his head. "Only you, Tony."

"What's up?" Clint asks, throwing herself onto the sofa next to Rhodey.

Tony waves him off. "No-"

"Pizza!" Thor calls out, interrupting Tony.

Clint hoots loudly then claps a hand over his mouth. They've all mostly gotten used to having to be more moderate with baby girl around, but every now and then one of them forgets. But only once did they scare baby girl enough to make her cry, and Thor and Clint felt really horrible about it.

Thor, followed by Jane, carries the huge stack of pizza in and miraculously within seconds everybody appears out of nowhere, including Steve who is bringing the bottle of formula for baby girl. The next couple of minutes are chaotic as the pizzas are handed out and pieces are exchanged because just because Tony doesn't want a whole pizza with pineapple doesn't mean he doesn't want any at all. It's a mix and match every time they have pizza; more often than not they each end up with at least half the pizza made up of various different flavors.

Unfortunately, Tony can't start eating immediately because there's a baby in his arms who is a lot less tolerant where waiting for food is concerned. But Loki lets him take bites of his pieces every now and then so he doesn't have to starve or whine too much because he's feeding baby girl while everybody else is already eating. Steve of course takes pictures but everybody is already used to that.

After they've eaten Clint asks to borrow baby girl. Under the watchful eyes of both parents he puts her on a blanket on the floor, and within five minutes Rhodey and Jane have joined him. Tony doesn't quite know what they're trying to accomplish, baby girl doesn't actually do much of anything yet – not even really properly follow people with her eyes – but as long as they don't overtax her it's fine. And they don't, Clint makes sure of that, and they're probably all three of them very aware of the fact that they have Loki's full attention despite the conversation going on around him. When baby girl starts to get a bit too stressed under all the attention Loki is quick to pick her up and put her on his chest so she can relax to the sound of Loki's heartbeat.

While Jane joins Thor on the sofa Rhodey and Clint stay on the floor, involved in a deep conversation on whether they want to have children or not. Tony notes that Natasha's attention immediately hones in on them and covers for her when she doesn't immediately react when Steve addresses her. Tony doesn't quite know what's going on with them about the whole children thing – he doesn't even know exactly what Natasha's problem is – and to be honest, he doesn't really want to know either. But that doesn't mean he doesn't have her back.

The whole week-end passes in the same manner; relaxed, people fawning over baby girl and with everyone mainly being lazy. Miraculously no asshole tries to crash their week-end by deciding to take over the world right at this moment. The best part about it all is that it keeps Tony from overthinking their impending trip to Asgard.

But inevitably Monday comes, and with it Odin and Frigga's visit. Rhodey left Sunday afternoon to report back for duty and Jane left early Monday morning. Pepper is back to work and the Avengers are unsubtly pretending not to lurk around in the common areas. The thing is nobody quite knows where the two gods will arrive, or even when.

At around eleven, Jarvis informs them that Frigga and Odin have appeared on the roof.