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“What are you drinking?” Ellie asked quietly, leaning on the railing of the deck. Joel had a steaming cup of something in his hands.
“Coffee.” He walked up beside her, leaning on the railing and mirroring her.
Ellie looked at him, confused. “Where’d you get that?”
“Uh, those people that came through last week.” Joel chuckled.
“Oh.”
Joel rocked back and forth on his heels. “A little embarrassed as to what I had to trade to get it, but…” He raised the mug, about to take a sip.“It’s not bad.”
###
You and your group were passing through the small settlement in Jackson, Wyoming. Your leader had mentioned it a few times, since he was familiar with Tommy Miller, the man who founded the small town with his wife, Maria.
The group had lots of supplies, and so did yours, so your group figured you could pass through and stay for a few days since they had allowed it before. Everyone would do some trading, and you would get to sleep in a warm bed for once…
When you all arrived, you were in awe of the state of the place. Lights that hung from old telephone poles illuminated the snow-covered streets in a warm yellow glow, and kids ran around playing tag, weaving between the various civilians huddled by the fire pits.
Your shoulders ached, the backpack you were carrying was filled with nothing but food, seeds, and a large bag of coffee beans.
One thing about your group was that you were always stocked in food and natural resources since you mostly lived off the land, and the Jackson group was stocked in weapons and supplies, something you had very little of.
When you were invited to one of their weekly dance-potluck-party events, you were frankly nervous as hell. You hadn’t been to something like this since before the outbreak, and large groups had become a rarity unless you were all fighting for your lives.
You had been given a room in a large house and took a long shower, the feeling of the hot water making you tear up. You missed it.
You arrived slightly late since you were pulled aside by a few people wanting to trade with you, weapon parts for seeds, and the like. One person had asked for your bag of coffee beans, but you were hesitant to give them over just for a few bullets.
When you got in, you immediately went straight to the bar. The lively crowd inside was already whittling a hole in your chest, and anxiety bubbled in your stomach as you walked around the dance floor. People laughed, clinked glasses, hugged… it was just like the old world.
Only it wasn’t the old world, and the way that these people smiled and partied like there weren’t infected all around them outside these walls had you on edge. How did they do it? Is that what living in a place like this did? Did it make you ignorant?
You took a long sip of the beer you ordered and got the sudden urge to get out. It was all too much. The loud music, the bright lights…
As you turned, you crashed into someone.
“Shit! Sorry!” You exclaimed, pulling back and immediately looking up at the tall figure. He was leaning on the bar and seemed to barely even notice you crashing into him because he was so large.
“It’s okay.” He said, smiling at you, his gaze soft. You swallowed, looking at the man, his hair grey, a stubbly beard on his face. He looked to be in his mid-fifties. Not that you were complaining.
You leaned on the bar beside him. He had a whiskey in his hand.
“I don’t recognize you…” He trailed off, looking at you out of the corner of his eye.
“My group and I are passing through.” You smiled nervously, taking a sip of beer. “Tommy likes to trade with us.”
The man put his whiskey down and stuck his hand out to me. You noticed the way his shirt sleeves were rolled up, exposing a long vein in his forearm. He was also wearing a watch, but the glass face was cracked and it seemed to be stuck in time.
“I’m Joel.” He said, and you grabbed his hand, shaking it slowly. “Tommy’s my brother.”
“Oh!” You laughed softly. “I’m Y/N.”
You held onto each other’s hands for a beat longer than normal, his palm warm against yours. You pulled away, a blush spreading across your cheeks as you looked down.
One thing about living in a world like this… was that human affection was hard to come by. Attractive men, even more so.
You swallowed, and Joel cleared his throat, taking a sip of his whiskey. “Sorry… I– I don’t often find myself talkin’ to beautiful women. I don’t quite know what to say.”
You felt your stomach swirl and looked up at him through the corner of your eye. “Who, me?”
To be quite honest, you were surprised he found you beautiful. Not because you hated yourself, but because you hadn’t thought about your looks in so long. You learned to forget about those things since they didn’t matter. A pretty face didn’t keep you alive.
“Yeah.” He chuckled. “I’m glad you bumped into me.”
You laughed, turning to him. Something about him felt extremely warm. Despite his nervousness and guarded exterior, you were drawn to him. It wasn’t every day you got a compliment from an older man. Was he probably way too old for you? Yes. Did you care? No. Life was short, and you were only here for a few days.
“I’m glad I did too.” You smiled at him, looking into his eyes. He had one of those faces, where you knew immediately from the creases between his brows that he had been through some shit. He had a small scar on the bridge of his nose.
“So, you enjoyin’ your time here?” Joel asked, finishing off his whiskey. You took a sip of your beer, looking out onto the party.
You chuckled. “Do you want the honest answer?”
“I do.”
“I kinda hate it.”
Joel laughed, his eyes crinkling. “Me too.”
As he looked off into the sea of dancers, you snuck a quick look down his body. He was lean but large. Something about his thumb hooked in his belt loop made you lick your lips and avert your eyes.
“Then why are you here?” You asked, suddenly realizing how rude that sounded.
Joel looked at you. “I’m not sure. Why are you here?”
“I guess I’m here to crash into sexy guys.” You smirked.
Joel smiled, shaking his head and looking off. “We need to find you someone else to crash into then…”
“Oh, come on.” You took a long swig of beer. “Don’t play shy, you flirted with me first”
He turned to you, his eyes narrow but curious. You felt the air being sucked out of your lungs.
“You’re right.”
“I know.”
There was a long silence, and to break the tension, you spoke up. “I guess this is just strange to me. Seeing everyone laughing like everything’s okay.”
Joel nodded. “I get what you mean.”
“Like, if you’ve seen what it’s like out there…”
“I have. Trust me.” Joel looked at you, his gaze alarmingly serious. You averted your eyes, drinking from your beer bottle again.
“Well, then how do you deal with it here?” You asked.
He took a quick breath in, thinking. “I got people I care about here. If they’re safe, I can sleep easy.”
You nodded, looking out at everyone. It made sense. Everyone was safe. They were allowed to feel safe. Maybe you were just jealous they were able to be so happy.
“Not a wife, I hope.” You joked, lightening the mood.
Joel chuckled. “Nope.”
“Girlfriend?”
“No.” The corner of his mouth upturned into a smirk.
You grinned. “Friend with benefits?”
“Not one.” He shrugged.
“Good.” You stared at him.
He looked around, clearing his throat. “Wanna get out of here?”
###
Joel practically pulled you into his house, and as he flicked on the lights you looked around in awe. It was a large house, with one big living room and a dining room off to the other side.
Joel’s voice interrupted your thoughts. “You’re, um… okay with this, right?”
You smirked at him, stepping closer. “Wouldn’t be here if I wasn’t.”
The air was hot and thick as he slowly grabbed your hand, leading you to the stairs. You both quickly went up, and he took you down the hall.
Your heart pounded in your chest and your stomach swirled with giddiness. It had been so long since you had felt the touch of another person.
When he pulled you into his room and shut the door, his hands quickly found your waist and pulled you into him, his lips brushing against yours, but not going in for the kiss that you were practically dying for.
You inhaled sharply as his eyes scanned your face as if debating with himself if he should take the plunge. Feeling you out, guessing your energy. You had just met, so you did the same, breathing into his mouth. Your nose brushed his.
“I forgot to ask…” He said quietly, his lips grazing yours. “What are you trading?”
You laughed softly, running your hands up his arms, feeling the muscles below his shirt. “You’re asking me now?”
“Yeah.” He pulled away slightly, teasing you.
You had to think about it for a minute, your brain foggy. “I have… seeds of all kinds…”
His hands ran up your waist, untucking your shirt from your jeans. One of his hands went down to your ass, the other one slipping under your shirt. You gasped at the feeling of his warm calloused hands on your skin, and he pulled you into him harder. He smelled so good, like firewood and a light hint of cologne.
You felt something hard press against your stomach.
“What else?” He asked, all the while keeping eye contact with you. Something about the way he was slowly undressing you, yet he hadn’t even kissed you yet, had your skin ablaze and your insides flooding with warmth.
“Um…” You swallowed, flustered. He was doing this on purpose. “Some animal pelts.”
“Mhm.” Joel reached up to the clasp of your bra. He undid it.
“And some…” You breathed, “Some coffee beans.”
Joel stopped, and his brow raised. “How much?”
“What?” Your brain was complete mush. You stared at his lips.
“How much coffee beans?”
You couldn’t get your mind off his hand caressing your ass, your bra hanging loosely, and his belt pressed into your pelvis. “A whole bag.”
“Hmm.” His hands went to the hem of your shirt, lifting it up and over your head. “Can I trade you for ‘em?”
You could barely register his words as he threw your shirt to the floor and then went for your bra. You let him take it off. “Are you using trading to dirty talk with me right now?” You laughed.
He didn’t even hesitate when your breasts were exposed, he simply grabbed your waist, his other hand slowly running up your ribcage. “I am.”
You giggled, biting down on your lip as his hand grabbed your breast, squeezing it gently. You arched your back, breathing heavily.
“Okay. You can trade me for them.”
He rolled your nipple in between his fingers, and your breath hitched. “Good girl.”
You felt your underwear suddenly get soaked. You swallowed.
“Now…” Joel leaned in, his beard scratching you as his lips found your neck. He placed light kisses on your skin just below your ear, trailing down, sucking lightly on your pulse. You moaned softly, tilting your head. “What do you need?” He asked, his warm breath ghosting over your skin. You got goosebumps.
“You mean…” You swallowed hard again. “For the trade?”
“For the trade.” He conceded, his teeth nipping at your skin.
Your stomach tied into knots, your face hot. “I think you know what I need right now.”
“Say it then.” He said, his tongue trailing up your throat.
Fuck it. Life was short. “Make me come and I’ll give you the coffee beans.”
Joel chuckled into your throat, and then he came back up to face you. His eyes were dark. Hungry.
“How many times?”
Your heart caught in your throat, and your jaw dropped in surprise. Oh. He was confident, then. You clenched around nothing.
“I… Uh–”
“Don’t be shy, darlin’.” His hand came up to your jaw, running his thumb along it. “How long’s it been?”
You stared at his lips, your hands latched onto him for dear life. Not only had it probably been years… he had you the most turned-on you had ever been in your life. All over a bag of coffee beans.
“A long time.” You whispered.
Joel leaned in. “Good.”
When he finally leaned in and placed an open-mouthed kiss on your lips, you practically melted into him, a sigh escaping your throat as you wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling yourself into his body further.
His beard scratched your face and it awakened something primal within you causing you to open your mouth wider and allow his tongue to find yours. It was sloppy, loud, and erotic as he drank you in, both of you taking your time and discovering the other’s pace.
It wasn’t long before he was walking you to the bed, his hands guiding your hips as he pulled away from the kiss. You wanted more, but he shoved you to the bed.
“Take those off.” He said sternly, and he was unbuttoning his shirt, motioning to your pants and boots.
You quickly kicked off your boots, undoing your pants and shimmying out of them like your life depended on it.
Still slightly shy, you left your underwear on. As Joel shrugged his shirt off, he raised a brow. “Those too.”
“I want you to take them off.” You said, unable to stop the words from leaving your mouth. Your skin tingled as you lay on the bed, his towering frame above you.
“Yes, Ma’am.” He cracked a smile, and your eyes trailed down his body, the hair on his chest, the slight hint of abs dusted with hair as well. Your mouth watered at the sight of the path of hair that led below his belt.
He quickly reached down and grabbed your ankle, and you bit your lips as he gently pulled you closer to the end of the bed. You felt so exposed, and he hadn’t even taken off your underwear yet.
You swallowed as he pulled your ankle to the side, opening your legs. He peered down at you, letting out a chuckle.
“Soaked already?”
Christ. You let out a giggle, bringing your hands down to cover yourself and closing your knees. “Shut up.”
“I ain’t makin’ fun.” He slowly got down to his knees at the edge of the bed, running his hand down your leg. “I like that I can get you all worked up by barely touchin' you.”
He reached for the waistband of your underwear, pulling them down. Your mouth went dry as you stared at him, his eyes looking at your body with a hunger you had never seen before.
When he got your underwear off, you were practically putty in his hands. He spread your legs, his eyes finding your cunt which was probably dripping. You felt your face go even redder, and you reached up to cover it with your hands.
“Oh…” Joel reached a hand down to your thigh, spreading you wider, his eyes devouring you. “She’s pretty too.”
Jesus Christ. You squirmed under his gaze.
“Please.” The word slipped out of your mouth, barely a whisper.
Joel smirked. “We got all night. Tell me what you want.”
It wasn’t that you didn’t know what you wanted. You knew exactly what you wanted. Your brain could come up with numerous different ways you wanted it, and various ways to say it.
But saying it was another story. Your breath caught in your throat, the words on the tip of your tongue, but some deep-seated filter in your brain kept them in.
Here you were, in a world overrun by infected, society destroyed, and a man on his knees willing to do whatever you wanted… and you still found yourself too polite to say it.
It was pathetic, actually.
But his eyes were so kind, his anticipation and willingness causing you to drop your walls.
“Use your mouth on me.” You said quietly, fighting a smile.
Joel gave a small chuckle and a nod. He had been waiting for you to say the words.
He kept his eyes on you as he began to kiss down your thigh, slowly reaching where you ached the most. You had to break away from his gaze and stare at the ceiling as he lightly blew cold air on your clit, causing you to squirm under his grip.
Finally, his tongue found your pussy, immediately licking you like a man starved. You drew a long shaky breath in, clenching around nothing as he moved to your clit. His tongue was surprisingly gentle, swirling around you and making you whimper.
He hummed as he worked his mouth on you, and you couldn’t help but wonder how much of your slick was going to coat his mustache, his beard. You were most likely dripping, his spit adding to the mix as he began to suck on your clit, the delicious pressure making you gasp.
You reached down and found his hair, pushing his face into you and grinding lightly on his mouth, trying to hold yourself back from absolutely suffocating him.
One of his hands held you open by your thigh, preventing you from claming around his head, and his other hand was holding your leg from below your knee.
Your legs began to shake as you were already nearing the edge, and you wanted to kick yourself for allowing him to get you there so fast. Some deal this was. When you looked down and found him staring at you with a triumphant look in his eyes, a strand of his long hair falling over his eyebrow, you knew that he knew… you were about to come on his tongue.
And you did. You came hard. It almost felt like the first time you had come in your life since it had been so long, and Joel’s tongue was somehow extremely good at learning your sweet spots, fast.
You pulled his hair and cried out as you finished, your body writing and your heart pounding in your ears, shocks of pleasure running through your body. You had to cover your mouth, the noises you were making were so lewd you were worried that someone outside would be able to hear.
He continued to work you as you calmed down, the world spinning as you returned to your body.
When Joel pulled away, you looked down at him, his beard soaked. He licked his lips. “That was easy.” He teased.
“Fuck off.” You sighed, your body still buzzing and your legs still trembling. You let out a laugh, and Joel kissed your inner thigh.
“Think you got another one for me?” He asked and felt your body pulse.
You propped yourself up on your elbows. “If you want the coffee beans, you’re gonna have to find out…”
It wasn’t long before Joel had moved up your body, his hand finding your used cunt, rubbing it lightly with his whole hand. You bit your lip, watching his forearm flex as he rubbed your clit in circles.
You were so overstimulated already, but you relaxed into his touch, his slow movements re-awakening the urge within you.
“So wet for me…” He mumbled to himself, and you ground into his hand as he began to push his middle finger inside you. It went in easily, your walls slick and ready.
Then, he pushed his ring finger inside, and you were surprised by the stretch, but had been years since you had put anything inside you.
He rubbed your clit with his thumb on the other hand, and you clenched around his fingers as he started to curl them up to meet your G-spot.
Joel looked up at you as he sped up his movements, his thumb rubbing your clit harder. His eyes trailed up your belly, to your breasts, to your face, his lips parted as he admired you.
“You look good like this.” He said, his eyes finding yours.
You swallowed down a moan, grinding on his hand. “Like what?”
“With my fingers inside you.”
Your teeth sunk into your lip, and you cursed yourself, already feeling your second orgasm building up. It was almost as if your body was making up for lost time.
“Close already?” Joel asked and dug your fingers into his sheets.
“How do you know?”
He smirked. “I can tell.”
You moaned and closed your eyes as he kept his pace, grinding the pads of his fingers into your g-spot repeatedly, your body drinking him in and producing the most pornographic sounds you had ever made. You pressed your lips together, staying quiet.
“Why are you being quiet?” He asked, and you felt your body tingling, your heart rate increasing, the pleasure in your cunt becoming too much.
“I don’t know…” You breathed. “I’m not used to–” You whimpered, unable to form sentences. “Being loud.”
“Try it.” He said, speeding up his movements. “I want to hear how good you feel.” You opened your mouth, letting out a heavy moan, your face going beet red at the sound of your pleasure.
“That’s it…” Joel whispered, and you felt your orgasm approaching quickly. Your heart felt like it was going to beat out of your chest. “There ain’t no one around. You can be as loud as you need, baby.”
His words threw you over the edge, his fingers grinding deliciously into your G-spot as your body squeezed him tightly. “Fuck, Joel...” Your voice shook, and your belly clenched as he continued to fuck you with his fingers, pulling your second orgasm out of you like it was his job.
And God, you were loud. It was freeing to be this loud. To be able to be this loud. Knowing that you were safe, in the walls of this house, in the walls of this community.
“There she is.” Joel chuckled at the sound of your moans, clearly proud of his ability to conjure up your sounds with just the touch of his hands. His cockiness drove you crazy.
When you regained your composure, he pulled his fingers out of you and reached for your thigh, spreading you open further. “Christ, look at you.” You felt how slick his fingers were.
You jumped as he landed a firm but a light slap to your aching pussy, and you tried to clamp your legs around his hand as you gasped.
Noticing the large bulge in his jeans, it suddenly occurred to you that Joel hadn’t even asked you to do anything to him… and part of you felt guilty about that, but another part of you felt even more into him. He just wanted to please you…
But now, you wanted him.
“I want you inside me…” You drawled, your nerves gone, your body practically floating in a post-orgasm fog.
He stood up to kneel on the bed. “I was inside you.” He teased.
“Not like that.” You breathed, and he chuckled, crawling over you and pressing a few kisses to your collarbone.
“Like what, then?”
You laughed softly, reaching down his body and finding the hard tent in his pants. He sucked in a quick breath, moving into your touch. “I want you inside me.” You repeated, squeezing him gently.
“Christ.” He sighed, and his lips were on yours, and you tasted yourself in his mouth. His tongue dove in and found yours, his hands bringing your legs up as he ground his clothed erection into your core. You would be all over his jeans. Somehow that made it hotter.
He reached down and undid his belt, unzipping his fly and reaching into his boxers to pull out his cock. Your hand found it immediately, running your fingers up the length of it. Joel choked out a moan into your mouth, and you got the impression that maybe it had been a long time since he had been touched too.
He began to run his length up and down your dripping pussy, slicking it up and teasing you, pulling his lips away from yours to look down, watching himself.
“By the way-” He grunted, his tip catching on your clit and sending a wave of pleasure through you. “I ain’t just doing this for the coffee beans.”
You smiled, your hands curling around his shoulders and holding him against you. “Good.”
Finally, you both let out a gasp as he began to push into you, his cock stretching your walls. You winced at the slight pain, but you were so wet that it slid in rather easily.
Joel groaned as he pushed himself further into you, his hand digging into your hip. “Fuck, baby…”
You cried out as he reached the hilt, his cock throbbing inside you. You felt utterly full, every movement your trembling body made caused you to clench around him.
He let a shaky breath out of his nose as he began to pull out again before slowly grinding himself back in, letting you get accustomed to his size. Your nails dug into his back, and you felt sweat drip down the back of your leg.
“Joel…” You whispered, grinding your hips onto him, feeling him hit your g-spot. You hooked a foot around the back of his thigh, urging him to move faster.
And he did. He began to fuck you, hard and slow, pinning you down into the mattress below. The wind was knocked out of you with each thrust, and it felt like he was made for you.
His lips latched onto your neck, sucking on it and letting his teeth nip your skin. You felt like you were floating on air, the only things in your mind were the feeling of his body on yours, his hands on your hips, his cock hitting you perfectly, and his hot breath on your skin.
And you found yourself nearing the edge again. The pressure inside of you was building up, and Joel could tell. He slowed down but kept the same angle, knowing that the head of his cock was prodding against you perfectly, drawing little gasps and whimpers and moans from your throat.
“That’s a girl…” He whispered in your ear, driving himself into you firmly, his hips slapping against your ass. You let out a loud moan, your legs beginning to tremble again.
Here he was, making you come for the third time. “Come on my cock, sweetheart…”
And there you were, doing exactly as he said. His name poured from your lips as you were thrown over the edge again, your body spent but still squeezing every last inch of pleasure it could out of you.
Joel came too, but you barely registered it, your body shuddering underneath him and clenching painfully around his cock as he rutted into you, coming with a loud groan.
“My god…” Joel sighed as he pressed his forehead into your shoulder again, his body shaking and his cock twitching inside of you. You were practically brain-dead, and you breathed heavily, trying to let your heart calm down.
When he pulled out of you, you ran your hands through your hair, trying to stop your legs from shaking.
“I did not expect my night to go like this.” You laughed, letting your legs fall to the bed. Joel looked down at your body, naked and covered in a sheen of sweat, lying there like you had just run a marathon. And he looked just the same.
“Me neither.” He chuckled and then groaned as he lay down beside you. “Christ, I’m gettin’ old.”
You laughed, rolling over and looking at him. “Didn’t seem like it.”
Joel smiled. “Tell that to my spine.”
“I’ll give you a massage.” You grinned, propping yourself up on one elbow.
He raised a brow. “Not yet.”
“What do you mean, not yet?”
Joel looked you up and down. “I ain’t done with you.”
###
Joel awoke the next morning and reached over to where you had been sleeping, but the mattress was empty. He opened his eyes and rubbed them, his back aching like hell.
He had paid his end of the deal alright. Joel stared at the ceiling, trying to remember how many times he had made you come. He had stopped counting if he was being honest, but he would never get the image of you fucked out of your mind wrapped up in his bedsheets for as long as he lived.
But you were gone, and part of him was disappointed. He would have at least made you breakfast, or something.
He rolled over and spotted a piece of paper on his bedside table.
He reached over and grabbed it, squinting as he read the handwriting.
Joel,
I’m sorry I have to leave so soon, but my group planned to move out at dawn. I didn’t want to wake you, you looked so peaceful. I left the bag of coffee beans on your kitchen counter, you really earned them ;) Enjoy!
Anyway, Tommy told my group we are always welcome in Jackson, so maybe when I return we can “trade” again if you know what I mean.
Thank you for the amazing night. I know I will be thinking about it for a long time.
I hope to see you again, Joel.
Yours,
Y/N
Joel chuckled to himself as he finished the note. He hoped to see you again too.
###
“A little embarrassed as to what I had to trade to get it, but…” Joel raised the mug, about to take a sip. “It’s not bad.”
He tried not to let the memories of that night flood back to him as he sipped the coffee, savouring the hearty flavour. Not now. Not after everything that happened.
Ellie only stared ahead, fiddling with her hands. She didn’t ask any questions.