Chapter Text
Vi: I don't actually have a last name.
Caitlyn: You could take mine.
Vi: What?
Caitlyn: What?
-----------------------------
Vi: Two brooooos!
Caitlyn: Chillin' in a hot tub!
Vi: Five feet apart 'cause we're not gay!
Caitlyn:
Vi:
Caitlyn: *tearing up*
Vi: Babe, c'mon...
Caitlyn: AND HERE YOU REALLY HAD ME THINKING WE HAD SOMETHING.
Vi: Babe...
------------------------
Mel: We need to do something about-
Caitlyn: *Burst in*
Caitlyn: Fuck you guys, I'm in charge now.
-----------------------
Ambessa: Now that your general, we need to discuss important matters such as-
Caitlyn: I messed things up with my girlfriend so badly- I mean, I'm not sure if she's my girlfriend, I mean we kissed and all but we never really got to talk about it- I left her behind, and hurt her, even though I promised I wouldn't change, things have been really difficult after my mother died, but I shouldn't be hurting people- I'm just trying to apprehend Jinx, and I guess you have to bad things to achieve good, but is there a line? She probably hates me right now, which is completely understandable, and she's been through a lot, and now I'm a general for the war effort against her people, so what do you think I should do?
Ambessa:…
Ambessa: You Pilties are going to be the death of me.
---------------------
Vi: Wow I went through this entire act without getting kidnapped for once, I consider this a win.
Meanwhile:
Mel: Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit, oh shit,
---------------------
Jayce: You know, it’s really funny, if it wasn't for four random kids breaking into my apartment and blowing it up, I wouldn't be as successful as I am today.
Vi....
Vi: Wait a goddamn minute
--------------------
Viktor: Would you please listen to me? I'm not the messiah!
Shimmer Addicts: HE IS THE MESSIAH!
-------------------
Caitlyn: Are you ready to commit?
Vi: A crime or a relationship?
------------------
Jinx: I don't need to touch grass, I need the fall of capatilism.
------------------
Jinx: *writing a letter*
Jinx: Dear Santa,
I'm writing to let you know I've been naughty...
And it was worth it you fat, judgemental bastard.
----------------
Vander: That's it, you're grounded! Claggor, no adventures for you! Vi, no fighting for you! Mylo, no stealing for you! And Jinx... oh my god, is there anything that you love?
Jinx: Revenge.
Vander: No vengeance for you.
Jinx: I was going to say "I'll get you for this," but I guess that's off the table.
------------------
Vi: I think I just figured something out. I got to go.
Caitlyn: Aren't you forgetting something?
Vi: Uuh...*hesitantly kisses Caitlyn's forehead before running out.*
Caitlyn: No, pay your bill! Damn, who raised you?
-------------------
Caitlyn: Just because I got blown up yesterday does not mean that I can't solve a conspiracy theory and bail a hot girl out of jail
-------------------
Vi: I think I'm falling for you.
Caitlyn: Then get up.
-------------------
Caitlyn: WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE? WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE?
Jinx: I want waffle fries!
---------------------
Jinx when Vi tells her she'll come back for her: Why the fuck you lying? Why you always lying?
---------------------
Jinx after Caitlyn comes out of the shower: Get dressed loser, I'm kidnapping you.
---------------------
Silco in the afterlife.....
Vander, Mylo, Benzo, Claggor, Greyson, and everyone else:.....
Silco: Soooo, there's been a bit of a misunderstanding here...
-------------------
Cassandra: So how did you meet this "Vi"
Caitlyn: In prison.
Cassandra: What?
Caitlyn: Yeah, I bailed her out, we went to Zaun together, and she took to a brothel
Cassandra: Oh my god, Caitlyn why?
Caitlyn: Then she got in a fight, got heavily injured, then we jumped in a pit full of drug addicts.
---------------------
Caitlyn: *Sees the Last Drop*
Caitlyn: Well that place definitely looks like it has bodies buried in the basement*
Vi: *starts crying*
Vi: Shut up! There is only one body, and he deserved it.
---------------------
Ekko: Hey everybody I've come back with a broken ankle and an exiled politician.
---------------------
Jayce: Hi, I'm Jayce, and only you can prevent forest fires... seriously, it has to be you. I'm sure as hell not gonna do it.
--------------------
Heimerdinger: What has even been happening?
Jayce: Viktor started a cult!
Viktor: Says the guy messing with wild runes with those two. *points at Ekko and Heimerdinger*
Elko: Vi became a class traitor.
Vi: And Cait became a dictator.
Mel: I got kidnapped
Caitlyn: And your mother committed war crimes.
Ambessa: It's for the good of my family. I didn’t become a hobo like this little thing *points at Heimerdinger*
Jinx: I became the most wanted and got stalked by a child.
Caitlyn: WHERE THE FUCK DID YOU COME FROM?