Chapter Text
Logan’s day started like any other; getting woken up at the crack of dawn for an ‘X-Men Level’ alert. He jumps out of his bed, quickly throwing on his uniform and still pulling on his boots as he hops down the hallway. He gets down to the launch pad quickly though, with only two others beating him there. Ororo and Jean had a girl’s night the night before, so it made sense that they both showed up together. And Scott arrives shortly before Hank does, with Kurt rolling in not long after him. Morph, of course, is the last to meander in, yawning loudly from behind their hand.
“What’s the verdict, doc?” Morph asks, stepping up to the group.
“Reactivated sentinels in the Nevada desert,” Scott tells them as the hologram shows multiple clips–some satellite, some surveillance, some pedestrian–of the giant robots flying, stomping, or just causing havoc in what looks like mostly desert or low-populated areas. “They’re currently making their way east, with the latest sighting being a good 30 miles from the Arizona boarder. We need to stop them before they get any closer to bigger cities and actually hurt people.”
“Any idea who activated them?” Jean asks.
“No,” Scott admits, shaking his head. “Hopefully we’ll find out. Morph and Kurt, I need you two to go and check out where the sentinels first activated in Mormon Peak. The rest of us will head for their current path, hopefully taking them down before they make it much further.”
“Aww, but I wanted to fight sentinels too,” Morph complains.
“We need you there to sneak around–hopefully weasel your way into whatever facility they have hiding out there. And Kurt can warp you guys out of there if you need it,” Scott tells them.
Morph sighs, but straightens up, shifting into a generic military goon. “Yessir Scott, sir!” Scott shakes his head as he rolls his eyes behind his visor and the groups head their separate ways.
“We got another ten reported sightings on the outskirts of Beaver Dam,” Jean announces over the jet's intercom.
“We’re still another thirty minutes out,” Hank informs her. “They’re just gonna have to hold out until we get there.”
“There are civilians there!” Jean shouts back. “They’re going to die!”
“People die all the time, Jeannie,” Logan does his absolute worst in comforting her. “All we can do is save the ones who know when to run.”
“Thanks for that Logan,” she quips back at him, rolling her eyes. “You’re totally helping me out here.”
“Anytime,” Logan says with a sarcastic smirk.
“Hush, my love,” Ororo says from beside him, resting her hand on his thigh. “We don’t want to raise tensions any higher.” Logan just shrugs, but places his hand onto hers, weaving their fingers together.
“On your six–” Jean shouts, snatching up a couple of people with her telekinesis and getting them out of harm's way.
“Got it–” Scott yells back, lasering the legs of one of the four that they are currently taking down. It collapses face-down into the ground and Logan jumps onto its back, ripping it open to tear out its ‘heart.’
Jean sets down the bystanders out of harm’s way and flies back over. “Storm, Beast–how are you two doing?” she asks over the coms.
Almost if on cue, a giant lightning bolt crashes down from the sky, a few miles away from them. “Just fine, Jean,” Ororo answers with a laugh. Thunder rolls and a few more lightning strikes come down.
“That’s my woman,” Logan says with a smirk, wiping the grease from his body. “How many left, Slim?”
Logan and Scott start running toward the lighting. “Don’t know for sure, maybe fifteen or so,” Scott replies.
Logan groans. “We’re gonna be out here all damn day!”
“Aww, you tired, Logan? Need me to carry you?” Jean jokes, smacking a hand on the back of Logan’s head as she flies ahead of them.
“You okay with your woman flirting with me like that?” Logan jokes, shouldering himself into Scott.
“She’s not flirting with you,” Scott answers back with a smirk. “Pretty sure she’s bullying you.”
Logan shrugs with a chuckle. “Same thing.”
Once they reach where Ororo and Beast are, the two are finishing up taking down the last of their group. Storm lands into Logan’s grasp with a loud laugh, smashing their lips together. Logan smirks into her mouth, squeezing his arms around her waist.
“Alright, enough you two–” Scott shakes his head at the couple currently making out in the height of battle. They stand side-by-side, but Ororo leans down and whispers something in Logan’s ear that makes his face go red, and tightly grab her hip. “I said enough–”
“I see three more–!” Jean suddenly comes over the coms. “Just northeast of your position.”
“Alright, let’s head out!” Scott shouts and he and Hank head off on foot, while Logan lets himself be lifted into the sky by his soon-to-be wife.
“You sure I’m not too heavy for you?” Logan asks Ororo, wrapping his legs around her torso.
“You are as light as a bird, my love,” she says, giggling as he kisses the side of her face.
“That’s it then?” Logan asks with a huff, glancing around from atop one of final downed sentinel.
“Think so,” Jean says, landing beside him. “Scotts not picking up anymore on the radar, and everything looks clear from above.”
“Good,” Logan says, hopping down from the machine. “We’re late for breakfast.”
Jean rolls her eyes with a smirk. “Seriously? You’re thinking about food at a time like this?”
“What?” Logan shrugs his shoulders. “I gotta fast metabolism. Man’s gotta eat–”
“Jean–” Ororo’s voice cut in over the coms. “There’s another!”
“What?” Jean asks, flying up higher to scan the horizon.
“Where at?” Scott responds, pulling out his radar. “I’m not seeing anything on the screen.”
A couple of lightning strikes go off in the distance. “It’s–It’s gigantic! Unlike any I’ve ever–!” her voice turns to a shriek before she gets cut off. It takes a moment to reach them, but the ground shakes and the sound of a distant explosion going off follows it.
“We’re on our way!” Jean tells her, zipping toward the storm clouds fading in the distance. She must have been hit. The three men race after Jean on foot.
“Why the hell can’t we see it on the radar?” Logan growls. Hank and Scott both shrug in tandem.
“Scott–” Jean’s voice comes through the coms after only about a minute. “Ororo’s hurt–I’m getting her–” then her voice cuts out.
“Jean?” Scott shouts back into the earpiece. “Jean–come in!” What is your location? Jean?”
“We gotta move!” Hank shouts and begins to race on all fours. Scott jumps up and uses his lasers to give him some extra air, while also trying to see ahead of them.
“Scott–” Jean’s shaky voice comes back through.
“Jeannie!” Logan answers her this time. “Where the hell are ya? You girls okay?”
“It grazed me, but I got us away from it. I’m okay for the most part, but Ororo’s hurt–” Jean groans. “Bad–”
“Jean–!” panic is present in Scott’s voice, but they can finally see the metal beast. It spots them too, whipping its head around instantly to lock onto them. “Stay put, we’ll take care of this.”
The machine is giant, almost three times the size of the other sentinels. It almost looks like the one that attacked Genosha but with only a single head. It’s arms lift and the men split up, trying to find a blind spot.
Logan dives atop a boulder, while Scott shoots himself into the air, and Hank dashes forward toward its legs. One arm follows Logan, and the other follows Hank, while its eyes track Scott, all three firing at the same time, hitting every one of its targets.
Logan and Hank are only slightly stunned, thrown a few yards away by the hit, and Scott is quick enough to activate his lasers to combat the blast, but he is still sent flying off into the distance with a shout.
“Scott!” Logan yells after him. Scott’s body hits the ground hard and tumbles away and when he finally comes to a stop, he doesn’t get back up. Logan turns back toward the metal beast before him, not wanting to keep his eyes off of it long. It takes a slow, single step forward, arm still locked on Logan and beginning to lighten at the palm. The mutant dashes back toward the rock again, just barely getting behind it before the sentinel fires once more. The rock takes the hit, but the blast still sends a shockwave, knocking Logan over slightly. Hank was trying to get close to it as well but was hit dead center in his chest this time, knocking him back even further. And this time, he doesn’t get back up.
“Shit,” Logan curses to himself under his breath, trying to figure out how to get this thing down. It moves slow enough that Logan might be able to rush it, but those cannons fire too fast in comparison and have too much of a blast radius for him to possibly get to it before being hit again.
Logan stays hidden behind the rock and tries to take in the surrounding area. There is another cluster of rocks across the way from him, but Hank is currently lying unconscious in front of them and Logan doesn’t want to risk him getting hit again. Other than that, there isn’t really any other cover nearby. The sentinel seems to only fire when they are moving, so if Logan can play this like a dangerous game of ‘Red Light, Green Light,’ he might be able to slip into its blind spot.
Logan glances over toward Scott, to see him still motionless in the distance, probably knocked unconscious by the blast. Logan takes a deep breath in and picks up a smaller rock from the ground beside him. He tosses the rock over his cover, toward the far side of the sentinel where the blast won’t hit Hank. Logan hears the rock hit the ground, but the sentinel doesn’t fire. Logan risks peaking over the large rock to see if it was even looking in that direction, just for the machine to immediately lock onto him, arm raising once more. Logan ducks back down and turns away, bracing himself.
The cannon fires, this time destroying the rock, sending shrapnel into and through Logan’s body, knocking him to the ground. Logan shakily tries to get to his hands and knees, just for another shot to hit him in his back only a few seconds later, sending him down once more as he lets out a pained shout.
Logan stays still once he hits the ground, trying to not even breathe. Unless that thing spots another target and Logan can get behind it, there’s no way he can land a hit on it without getting blasted again. He should have radioed Jean–no. He can’t risk her getting hurt too. With how quickly that thing took down Hank, it could have killed her with a direct blast. Ororo–How badly was she hit? Jean just said ‘bad’ which could mean anything, but with how strong this thing is–
Logan squeezes his eyes shut, trying not to think about that. Hopefully Jean was able to get Storm back into town. Maybe to a doctor. That’s all he can hope for right now. It’s up to him. Only him.
Logan’s eyes fly open and he grinds his teeth. He takes a deep breath in and jumps to all fours, dashing toward the sentinel. It only takes a few seconds for the blast to hit him, but Logan takes it in the face with a shout, his claws digging into the earth to keep him from being thrown back. He pushes the pain down and although his sight is blurred from the damage he received, blowing half of his face clean off, he takes off again in that direction, knowing that he’s only mere metres from the beast now.
After only a few feet, Logan hears another gun starting up and digs his claws into the ground once more, bracing himself for the blast.
“Logan run–!” Jean’s voice cuts in, but not over the coms.
“Jean–!” Logan shouts, just before the blast goes off. But it doesn’t hit him. “Jean!” Logan shouts again, trying to blink the scene back into his eyes, but his vision is still spotty.
“Run!” Jean barks again followed by a groan. She sounds close to him. Did she take the hit? Another shot starts to sound and Logan focuses his sight enough to make out Jean’s silhouette before him. She’s holding something in front of them, and the blast sounds, hitting whatever she’s holding and knocking her back into Logan.
“Jean!” Logan shouts as he catches her. “Jean go, I can handle this–!”
“No, we got–” A roll of thunder sounds from around them, shaking the earth beneath them. “Ororo–NO!”
A bright flash ignites before them and Logan grabs Jean to tuck her under his body, away from the blast.
When Logan comes to, his ears are ringing and his vision is still blurred. Jean is still under him and he quickly finds her neck to feel for her pulse. He sighs in relief when he finds it. “Oh thank God,” Logan mutters, pulling her close.
“Logan–Oh my God!” Scott’s voice sounds, sounding like he covered his mouth half-way through.
Logan rolls off of Jean, shouting as his back comes in contact with the dirt. It’s definitely torn open, most likely from the blast. “Don’t worry, she’s alive,” Logan groans, waving a hand in the direction of Scott’s voice. “Mind giving me a hand, Slim? Got my eyes knocked out a bit.”
“Ororo!” Scott shouts and races past Logan and Jean, heading in the direction of the sentinel.
“Scott!” Logan shouts, rolling over toward the sentinel as he grits his teeth. He can’t see details, but the metal beast is down, bits and pieces of it littering the surrounding area. “Scott, where is she?” Logan yells after him, shakily pushing himself to his feet. “Ororo!” Logan shouts, heading toward the body of the sentinel, following the blue hue of Scott. “Scott, do you see her? I can’t see–Scott!”
Logan drags himself up to where he can just barely make out the blurred shape of Scott kneeling in the dirt, leaning forward. Logan can hear his breath shudder and sniff. “‘Ro?” Logan shakily breaths out, the strong smell of blood assaulting his senses. He collapses beside Scott, a huff pushing its way from his damaged lungs as his knees hit the ground. He can just barely see her now. What’s left of her.
Her lower and left side is gone, just the right side of her torso and head left.
“Oh God–!” he wails, leaning forward to cup the sides of her face, brushing the loose, now dark red curls forward to cover the large gash on the left side of her face. Her eyes are open and staring straight through Logan, but a small smile is present on her lips. “Or-ro-o–RO!” Logan shouts, the tears rolling from his eyes and splashing down on her cold skin.
“Logan–” Jean’s soft voice sounds from behind him, followed by a gasp. “Oh God–” Scott quickly stands to hold Jean as she starts to collapse in sorrow. “Ororo! Oh God–” Scott shushes her, rubbing his hands over her back as he turns her away from the sight before them.
“Hank,” Scott looks up to where Hank is sitting upright on his haunches, holding a paw over his mouth, tears running down his face. “C-contact Morph and Kurt. Le-et them know–” he shudders. “Let them know–”
“I’m on it, Scott,” Hank tells him, standing up and wiping the tears from his face.
“My beautiful, Ororo,” Logan moans, pressing his lips to her forehead. “We’re gonna fix you up. You’re gonna be okay–”
“Logan–” Scott’s voice sounds.
“You’re gonna fix her, Scott!” Logan shouts, standing up from her body and grabbing Scott by the front of his uniform, shoving Jean away in the process. “You’re gonna fuckin’ fix her or I’m gonna fuckin’ kill you!”
“Logan, stop–” Jean tries.
“Use your powers to stabilize her, Jean!” Logan shouts at her. She grips her arms, turning her face away from him. “Don’t just fuckin’ stand there, do something!”
“She’s dead, Logan,” Scott brings his hands up to hold onto Logan’s forearms. “There’s nothing we can do.”
“She-e’s not dead–” Logan shouts, reeling back a fist and sending it into Scott’s jaw. “Don’t fuckin’ say that! Don’t you dare fuckin’ say that!” Logan pins him down to the ground and grips the front of his shirt with one hand, while his claws slide out from his other. “Don’t you dare fuckin’ say that,” Logan barks again, but quieter this time, tears starting to pour from his eyes once more.
Once Logan’s grip on Scott loosens, the man sits up from under him, wrapping his arms around the stout mutant’s body. “I’m so sorry, Logan.” Logan shudders, going limp in his grasp, his claws retreating into his body. Jean kneels down beside them and pulls Logan’s head to rest against her chest. “I’m so sorry, Logan”
Logan opens his eyes into the dark bedroom. Tears have flooded into his ears from how he’s lying on his back. With a shaky sigh, he wipes them off of his face with the palms of both of his hands. A groan sounds from beside him and he glances over to see Kurt roll away from him, pulling the sheets up over his bare shoulder.
Logan sits up and dresses himself, before quietly slipping from Kurt’s room. He autopilots himself to the staff kitchen, pulling out the stool to reach his booze stash at the top of one of the cupboards. He pulls down a new bottle of whisky. He leans his back against the counter and pops the cork out, downing a few chugs as he blinks back the rest of his tears.
As he stands and stares across the room, he sees a flicker of movement in his peripheral, and just barely catches a ghostly white figure passing by the kitchen entryway. Logan stills, gripping his bottle tighter, not sure if he actually saw something or if it was just his imagination. He quietly steps from the kitchen and peeks down the hallway, just to see an orange glow shine from the opening to the study.
Logan steps up to the room and peeks through the partially open door. Morph is seated before the fireplace, staring intently at the growing flames before them. Logan recognizes the shirt that they’re wearing.
“I was wondering where that flannel ended up,” Logan says, startling Morph and causing them to flip around on the ottoman. The next thing that Logan notices are the tear streaks running down their face. They must have had a rough night too.
“S-sorry,” Morph says as Logan steps up to the fireplace. They wipe the remainder of their tears on the sleeve. “It was in my room still–here–” Morph starts to take the shirt off.
“No, it’s fine,” Logan says softly and he leans down to pull the garment back over Morph’s shoulder, smoothing down the fabric once it’s back in place. “I’ve got plenty. You keep that one.”
“Thanks,” Morph says quietly, gripping their upper arms. Logan sits himself down in the armchair beside the fireplace, taking another swig from his whiskey. It’s quiet between the two, just an occasional pop from the fireplace breaking the silence. Logan examines Morph’s face. The rims of their eyes and nose are both bright red, so they must have been crying for a while before Logan found them. Logan wonders if the entire mansion was plagued by nightmares tonight, or if it was something else. He wonders if the reason that Morph had been crying because of him. That wouldn't surprise Logan one bit.
“Morph–”
“L-Logan–”
They both speak at the same time and Logan waits for Morph to continue. But after nothing, he speaks up again. “You okay?” he asks, already knowing the answer.
Morph’s lips pull into a tight line, something that they do when they want to say something. Logan knows that whatever it is, they aren’t going to say it. “Y-yeah. Just had a bad dream,” Morph says, proving Logan right.
As much as he wants to, Logan isn’t going to pry. Not right now. “Me too,” Logan says, folding one leg over the other and taking another big gulp from his bottle. “I came down for a drink, but I saw you walk past the kitchen and it scared the shit out of me.” He can’t stop himself from chuckling slightly, trying to lighten the mood. “I thought you were a damn ghost.”
“I didn’t even see you,” Morph says with a small smirk on their lips. “You probably would have scared me right back if I did.” They finally glance up at him, their eyes shimmering with lingering tears, a soft red glow across their face. Logan feels his gut twist at seeing such a pained expression on Morph’s face. They look like a kicked puppy and Logan hates that look. No, he hates what that look is associated with. It’s the same kind of look that they would give him when they took care of Logan’s needs. A look of sadness, but also a look of understanding. Logan hates that he knows that look so well. Hates that he knows it because of how he treated them.
“Wanna share?” Morph asks, holding their hand out towards the bottle. Logan shakes away the negative thoughts and smiles at them, passing the bottle over. Morph snatches it and takes a few big gulps. Logan smirks as Morph squeezes their eyes tight, swallowing down the harsh liquor.
Logan almost finds himself laughing as he watches Morph burp with a hand pressed to their lips. “What?” You don’t like it?”
“Don’t know how you can stomach this crap,” Morph says, followed by another burp, this one seeming a bit wetter than the last. They hand the bottle back over and Logan takes it, knocking back a small sip. “You’re insane.”
“Just got a bit more drinking experience under my belt ‘s all,” he says with a smirk, followed by a few more large chugs. After a loud gasp, he sets the bottle down beside the chair and leans back into the fabric, making himself comfortable. Logan watches as Morph warms their hands before the fire, rotating them and rubbing them together. “Where’s your pants?” Logan questions, his eyes glancing down at Morph’s pale, bare legs. It’s not like them to be so underdressed. “It’s too cold out for you to be walkin’ ‘round with no pants on.”
“They ran away,” Morph quips with a side-eye and a smirk. Their eyes shift down. “Where’s your shoes?”
Logan rests his feet on the edge of the mantle, stretching his toes out in the heat. “You know I hate shoes.”
Morph brings a slipper up to bump against Logan’s bare feet. “Yeah, but no socks at least?” they say, rolling their eyes when Logan just shrugs. “I could never. What if you step on something sharp? Or wet–” they shudder. “Lord knows the kids are always leaving stuff all over the floor.”
Logan stares at the fire, the memory of the pain he got from that final blast rippling through his body, causing his spine to stiffen, it feeling so fresh after his nightmare. “I’ve been through worse pain than a lego in my foot.”
Morph scoffs. “That’s the worst kinda pain though!” Logan just shrugs again, trying to not think about Ororo’s face. The way that her beautiful blue eyes just stared right through him. How he couldn’t save her. How he couldn’t even bring himself to touch her mangled body again. How Jean brought him her dented engagement ring that she had found in the rubble. How she sat with Logan and held him while he continued to cry. How when Morph and Kurt finally got there less than an hour later, Scott had to stop them from getting too close so that they could be spared the gore of their deceased friend. How the two sat with Logan instead while Jean contacted back home to let everyone else know.
Logan grabs the bottle and takes a deep breath in with his eyes closed, chugging the rest of the liquid down. He needs to stop thinking about it. Ororo is gone. She’s dead. As much as it hurt him to admit, she’s dead. Logan glances over to Morph to see them slowly leaning toward the fire. Their eyes have slid closed and their arms are crossed over their legs, holding their upper body upright slightly. They look so tired. Morph had done so much for Logan. Helped him so much with the pain of losing the woman that he loved. And what did he do in return? Nothing but use Morph's body for his own gain.
Logan sighs, rubbing his fingers and thumb into his eyes. God, he’s been a shitty friend. He needs to make it up to Morph, but he doesn’t know how. He knows that Morph has feelings for him, but Logan can't find himself able to love them back, because every time he looks at them now, all he sees is Ororo. Even if love is off of the table, could they even be friends again? Can he mend what he ruined? Is that even possible now, with everything that he did to them?
Morph's body sways in place a bit, definitely drifting off. “Hey,” Logan whispers, resting a hand on their shoulder, causing them to jump slightly. Morph turns to look at Logan and he once again feels that all too familiar pang of guilt stab and twist around in his gut at the half-lidded eyes that stare that Morph gives him. “You’re gonna fall in,” Logan says quietly, rubbing his thumb on Morph's shoulder. He sits back in the chair, scooting slightly over to make a bit of room for Morph and gesturing his hand to them. He could have moved to the couch, but Morph looks like they need more than just sitting beside Logan right now. And it’s the least he can do for them. “Come here.”
Morph has a tired smile across their face as they climb up into Logan’s lap. Morph is a bit taller than Logan, so with them being on his lap, they rest their face atop Logan’s head. Logan can feel them rub against his hair, hear them breathe in his scent, and it makes Logan’s chest flutter.
“I missed this,” Morph says quietly, their hand rubbing on Logan’s chest. “I’ve missed you.” Logan feels his body try to turn him into Morph’s touch. He feels the want–the need to kiss them right now–
No, he can’t. Logan instead stares intently at the fireplace. It's just the alcohol swimming around in his mind. That's the only reason that he's feeling like this. Logan can’t let himself do that with Morph. It wouldn’t be right to Kurt. He doesn’t need to ruin what they just started. “Morph–” Logan starts, but Morph’s voice cuts him off.
“Are you happy?” they ask, fingers still dancing on Logan’s chest. “With Kurt?”
Logan finds himself sighing, hoping that this means that Morph isn’t trying to take this further. Grateful. “Yeah, I am. We’re just trying this casually. I’m still not sure if I’m ready for another real relationship yet.”
“That’s fair,” Morph says, stilling their hand on Logan’s chest. “I’m happy for you, Logan,” they say, leaning away slightly, but Logan keeps his eyes fixed on the fire. Morph’s hand grasping his cheek brings him back and Logan lets his eyes slide shut, leaning into the other’s soft, warm touch. God, he misses Morph. Dammit, he misses them. Misses their soft moments, like this. The comfort that Morph would always bring him. Their touch. Their warmth.
But he is happy with Kurt. Logan has real feelings for him. He finds him attractive, just the way he is. With Morph, it was only because they could look and sound like Ororo. That was the only reason that Logan came to them in the first place. And that wasn’t good for him. For either of them. He understands that now and he can’t let himself be like that with Morph again.
“He’s a good man,” Morph says quietly, interrupting the wandering of Logan's mind. “Good for you.”
Kurt is a good man. Too good, if Logan is being honest. He’s too sweet, too kind, too perfect to be stuck with a broken man like Logan. But even so, Logan still asks, “You think so?” as he gazes up at Morph’s soft face in the low light of the fireplace.
“Yeah,” Morph says quietly, resting their head atop Logan’s again. “I really do.”
Logan startles awake when he feels a weight shift on his body. Morph groans, rubbing a cheek against the top of his head. They must have both drifted off. Logan carefully stands up with Morph in his arms, abandoning his empty bottle by the armchair.
Logan carefully walks back up the stairs to Morph’s room. He pushes down on the handle–grateful that they switched to handles instead of those old damn doorknobs they used to have–and quietly steps into Morph’s room. Logan is surprised to see another person already in their bed, but his gut settles when he realizes that it’s just Rogue. He didn’t expect to feel jealous–was that what that was?–about seeing another person in the bed that he and Morph used to share so much. But he shouldn't feel that way. Why is he feeling this way?
Logan carefully sets Morph down and tucks them in. “‘Night, Morphy,” he whispers, rubbing a thick hand over Morph’s head. They nuzzle into their pillow with a soft smile, gripping it tightly in their hands. Logan keeps his hand there for a moment too long, before finally clenching his fist and quietly leaving the room.