Chapter Text
007n7 was a father.
007n7 had a son.
Did he truly? He hadn't signed any adoption papers and quite frankly, he had just met his new child only roughly around an hour and a half prior. He groaned at the thought of dealing with endless paperwork, but eventually settled onto watching over the child.
He was a bright red baby, no older than a few months, and was currently sleeping inside of a shabby laundry basket. 007n7 hadn’t been that vicious to simply leave his newly earned child in the box he had arrived in by himself—so he had managed to dig out some old but soft pillows and blankets, filling the basket to the brim with cushions.
Although it wasn't the most comfortable for his son, it would suffice for the time being; at least until he had saved enough to buy a legitimate crib. He even took the liberties of giving the child a name; Coolkidd! The work of a genius, 007n7 had boasted to himself.
Still, he had found it hard to believe that he was a father now—everything had just happened quickly from the moment he saw the kid on his doorstep.
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It had been late in the evening, eight-thirtyish if 007n7 could recall. He had been working in his office, a small room that was cluttered with old prototypes and failed experiments.
007n7 had taken a seat near his desk, eyes practically burning from staring at his computer screen for so long—reviewing the same lines of code over and over again. Every so often he would encounter an error he had missed the time prior, so there was truly no harm in double checking!
After the umpteenth time of him reassessing his interface, he had heard a brief thump from down the hallway of his home. It had been so quick that he doubted his own ears, internally debating if he had just imagined it.
Just as he was about to turn back and resume his work, the sound had returned. This time, far more aggressive that it had left no further hesitation for 007n7.
He let out an exaggerated groan, hopping out of his chair and leaving his office. Keeping a steady pace down the corridor, he had begun to ponder to himself. Who would be knocking this late?
It couldn't have been Noli—he normally texts or gives some sort of warning before dropping by unexpectedly. Well, most of the time at least.
That was his entire list of possible visitors. Jeez, was he that lonely?
Finally reaching his front door, he unfettered the lock and slowly peeked through the door before walking out. His eyes landed on nothing but air, puzzling 007n7.
It was probably just some annoying kids… 007n7 speculated, waiting only a few moments longer before sighing and stepped backwards, starting to close the door before he heard another odd sound.
It was a high pitched wail, a desperate cry for something, but 007n7 had no idea what it was. He didn't even know where the screech had come from in the first place, it's not like there was anyone outside. Well, except for the conveniently placed baby that happened to be directly in the left blind spot from the door to the outside world.
Wait… Huh?
007n7 blinked, fully throwing the door open and walking outside. Glancing down at his doormat, an actual baby was settled only a few feet away, wrapped in shoddy blankets inside a small box while sleeping.
What the actual fuck?
The reaction was instantaneous, 007n7 immediately panicked and quickly picked up the baby, cradling the child in his arms. He soon examined his neighborhood, scrutinizing every corner that he could see from his house.
Maybe this was an elaborate prank? Someone could have accidently dropped their child on his front door? It wasn't entirely impossible…
Don’t be stupid, Seven! Someone left it here on purpose! Why would someone even—
007n7’s inner conflict had been cut off by a familiar squeal, the baby in his arms had finally woken up and was most definitely hungry.
Rushing back inside his house, 007n7 sprinted towards the kitchen, keeping a secure grip on the small child.
Rocking the child with one arm, he used the other to open his fridge, scanning the contents to find something suitable for the baby to eat.
Pizza wouldn't work, the baby didn't even have a full set of teeth yet… Maybe a burger? Nope. How about.. applesauce?
Yeah! That's perfect!
007n7 mentally gave himself a high five before taking out the small cup of applesauce, sliding open the kitchen drawer and grabbing a small metallic spoon as well.
Settling down on his couch, he lowered the baby from his shoulder, resting him against his chest. 007n7 peeled open the plastic layer on top of the cup, sticking the spoon inside of it.
Scooping out a small amount, he gently raised it to the baby’s lips, pushing it slightly forward and tilting it up. 007n7 poured it into his mouth, letting the child taste the sweet mixture of fruits and cinnamon.
The baby had made a confused sound, swallowing the soft blend with no further output. At the continued silence of the child, 007n7’s heart dropped, internally panicking while searching for an alternate solution to the baby’s hunger.
Suddenly, the infant let out an adorable giggle, a bright smile on his face as he stuck out his small arms. He reached out for the spoon, wanting to taste more of the soft applesauce.
007n7 sighed in relief, dipping the spoon back into the cup and gathering more, repeatedly feeding the baby.
After he had finished the cup of applesauce, the baby had a content expression on his face—now gently sucking his thumb while he rested against 007n7’s chest.
007n7 smiled at the sight, shifting the baby to a more comfortable position in his arms. Gently cradling the baby, he cautiously stood up off the couch.
He glanced around the living room, his eyes landing on a nearby alarm clock. The time was now 9:15, around 40 minutes had passed since he met the baby.
Speaking of the baby—now sound asleep in 007n7’s arms, he would eventually need a place to sleep. 007n7’s shabby, uncomfortable mattress is probably not good for the child’s body.
That was one option gone, especially considering the possibility that the child could simply roll off the bed. This led to 007n7 searching around his house for solutions.
With the baby in his arms, he walked into each and every individual room to find something suitable, stopping at his bedroom.
Next to his bed laid an empty laundry basket; the shiny white that had painted the bin now covered in stains and dirt. It’s better than nothing..
007n7 sighed, shifting the small child to stay in his left arm with a small jump while he used his right to pick up the basket.
Settling with the two in his arms, he had taken a few steps to leave the bedroom before he stopped. Glancing down at the empty basket, he began to think.
He couldn't just simply leave the child in here—it would probably be uncomfortable with the rough edges of the bin. He just needed something to.. something to cushion it!
With the idea in mind, 007n7’s face lit up as he caught a glimpse of roughly folded blankets and pillows stacked in his halfway opened bedroom closet.
007n7 placed the basket on the nearby nightstand, walking over to the closet and sliding the door fully open. He grinned as he bent down and used his free hand to pick up a stack of beddings, commending himself for his genius.
Blankets in hand, he dropped them neatly inside the laundry basket—making sure to cover all the uneven borders with cushions to not accidentally scratch the baby.
Pleased with his work, he gently placed the child inside the bin, watching him shift and sway in his sleep. He added another small blanket on top, enveloping the baby with warmth.
007n7 carefully lifted the basket and slowly walked out of his bedroom, traveling down the halls of his apartment to the living room.
Finally reaching the desired location, he stepped in front of the couch; gently setting the laundry basket holding the child on the couch.
007n7 soon followed, plopping down onto the seat and sinking into the cushions. He leaned back, letting out a sigh of relief and exhaustion as he relaxed next to the bin.
He glanced next to him, a small smile had tugged on his lips as he watched the child sleep, finding his small movements and shuffling to be absolutely adorable.
He began to think, mostly about the entire sequence of events in the past few hours—but also about the baby itself. He couldn't just keep on calling it “child” or “the baby”.. it needed a name!
007n7’s mind drifted to his precious exploiting device, nicknamed the COOLGUI.. and, well.. the baby is indeed a child.. How about..Coolkid?
“Hmm.. No. That sounds basic..” 007n7 whispered to himself, raising a hand to his chin in thought. Suddenly, he lit up with an idea.
“Coolkidd!” He exclaimed, wincing at his volume and quickly checking on the child to make sure he hadn't woken up. Sighing in relief when he noticed the baby had only shifted to the edge of the bin, still in the deep arms of sleep.
“Yeah.. that's it! Coolkidd! The extra “d” is so much better!” He grinned to himself in satisfaction, “You’re going to be Coolkidd!” He reached over to the baby—no, Coolkidd, and pulled the blanket off his face just a smidge, 007n7’s eyes twinkling with fondness as he saw the peaceful expression on Coolkidd’s face.
Chuckling at the sight, he eventually stood up after a few minutes of thinking. The initial adrenaline rush of dealing with an unexpected child had faded and 007n7 had been left spent and tired.
Going through his regular nightly routine, he had felt too tired to take a shower so he simply brushed his teeth, washed his face with some cleanser and changed into a pair of sweatpants and casual T-shirt.
007n7 ended up walking back towards the living room instead of his bedroom, wanting to sleep near the child incase of an emergency. Laying down on the couch, he had grabbed one of the extra blankets from earlier and draped it around himself—placing the pillows from the couch beneath his head.
Curling his knees into his chest to make sure the laundry basket wasn't accidently kicked, he shifted his chest into a more comfortable position before his eyes eventually fluttered closed.
007n7 drifted off into a relaxing sleep, the only sounds left in the room being the small shuffle of blankets and soft snoring from the new father.