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Everyone likes Donghyuck.
Jeno realizes this almost immediately, the night he first meets him in the backyard of Jaemin’s apartment. Donghyuck arrives an hour late yet he’s instantly the life of the party, endearingly loud and boyishly charming in a way that makes people hover around him for his attention. From where he’s standing near the wall, Jeno is only able to get a good look at him when Donghyuck eventually makes his way to the beer pong table, pairing up with an enthusiastic Chenle.
He’s pretty, with floppy hair and downturned eyes and pink lips pressed against a White Claw can. Leather jacket and baggy jeans, fingers decorated in silver rings, black-rimmed glasses. Jeno watches with interest as Donghyuck bounces the ping pong ball once, twice against the table before smoothly dunking it into a cup. Chenle cheers and, across the table, Jaehyun and Johnny boo good-heartedly. Donghyuck curtsies.
Everyone likes Donghyuck, and Jeno does too. It’s hard not to like Donghyuck even if you don’t really know him, because he’s confident and funny and sweet and pretty in a way that makes people do a double-take. Donghyuck treats strangers like they’ve been friends for years and he treats close friends with the affection of a lover, generous with his sloppy cheek kisses and bear hugs and pet names. Jeno likes Donghyuck when they make eye contact a few hours into the party and Donghyuck makes his way over. Donghyuck’s cheeks are flushed from alcohol when he introduces himself. Jaemin’s new co-worker, but he actually went to high school with Mark and university with Chenle.
“The city is smaller than you would think,” Donghyuck says. “But I’ve never seen you before!”
Jeno introduces himself back, uncharacteristically shy under Donghyuck’s steady and undivided attention. He’s Jaemin’s best friend and a well-known homebody among the group.
“Jaemin had to drag me out for his party tonight,” Jeno admits. Donghyuck smiles. “I like to stay home.”
Talking to Donghyuck is easy. He easily leads conversations but doesn’t monopolize them, and Jeno finds himself talking about anything and everything. Jeno likes Donghyuck when he finds out they both like the same kind of video games and music and share the same sentiments on the latest “Fantastic Four” movie (Donghyuck: “I dreamt about Pedro Pascal the night I watched it”). And he likes Donghyuck even more when he laughs at Jeno’s poor attempts at humor, head thrown back and eyes crinkled as he giggles and then chokes on his drink.
They leave the party together later that night, having found out earlier that they’re taking the same subway train back into Manhattan. They sit in the corner of the subway car and talk. Jeno’s stomach tightens every time he makes prolonged eye contact with Donghyuck or every time he casually leans against Jeno. Donghyuck is just so pretty and, even in the indescribable smell that haunts every subway train in New York, he smells like sweet vanilla and sweat. Jeno licks his lips.
“When do you get off?” Donghyuck asks.
“Uh,” Jeno looks up at the screen. “I get off at 59th. How about you?”
Donghyuck blinks and glances at the screen as well. “I’m a few stops after you.”
Internally, Jeno is relieved. He realizes then that he wants to keep talking with Donghyuck, and that he doesn’t want to part ways yet. He wonders how weird it would be to ask if Donghyuck wants to come over to his place. Would Donghyuck want to talk more? Maybe Jeno could make them a late-night snack. Would they kiss? Would they maybe, like, explore each other's bodies? Wait, is that too forward? Jeno likes Donghyuck. And, Jeno is pretty sure they’ve been flirting this whole night.
“Do you want to exchange phone numbers?” Donghyuck suddenly asks, and Jeno startles out of his thoughts. “Your stop is coming up.”
“Are we flirting?” Jeno blurts. His face burns in embarrassment. “Sorry, ugh. What I meant is-”
Donghyuck laughs and pokes Jeno in the side. His hand lingers on his body for a few moments and Jeno feels hot all over. “Yes, Jeno. We’re flirting. Now, hurry, give me your phone before you have to leave.”
They exchange numbers. When the train reaches his stop, Jeno stands up. He wonders how he should say bye to Donghyuck. A bro hug? A wave? A hand shake? Jeno hasn’t felt this flustered in years.
Donghyuck answers for him though, giving Jeno a quick peck on the cheek before pushing him out onto his platform.
As the train doors slide shut, Jeno, holding his cheek like he’s been slapped, watches Donghyuck put his phone next to his ear.
“Text me,” Donghyuck mouths, smiling brightly.
The train leaves and Jeno stands alone on the platform, heart beating loudly and face flushed.
🚇
Jeno likes Donghyuck. Like, a lot.
A week after the party, Donghyuck had come over to Jeno’s apartment with Thai take-out. A casual movie and dinner night had ultimately led to Jeno wetly pressing his lips against Donghyuck’s mid-way through watching “Crazy Rich Asians”. It had felt a little romantic to Jeno at that moment, touching Donghyuck’s soft waist and mouthing at his neck to the background music of “Can’t Help Falling in Love”.
“I like this part of the movie,” Donghyuck said, panting and squirming on the living room couch under Jeno. “The wedding scene.”
I like you , Jeno had thought as Donghyuck tugged him down again, mouth open and legs spread.
Donghyuck comes over often after that night and he starts to even sleep over. They cook dinner together and take turns choosing what to watch during movie nights. Donghyuck brings a plant over to liven up Jeno’s minimalist apartment and Jeno notices one of his t-shirts going missing, then a hoodie. Sometimes, Donghyuck brings his laptop over and they game together, pressed side by side on Jeno’s living room floor.
Jeno likes all the moments he shares with Donghyuck. He likes Donghyuck on Tuesday nights, when he feels Donghyuck open up for him underneath bed sheets and Jeno presses their sweaty bodies together. He likes Donghyuck on Friday afternoons, when they both get off work early and eat bagels together in Central Park while sharing earphones. And he likes Donghyuck on Sunday mornings, when they eat breakfast together while watching “Yumi’s Cells” and Jeno smiles to himself every time Donghyuck unknowingly shakes his head while eating.
🚇
Now, here’s the issue. Jeno isn’t sure if they’re actually dating or not.
Donghyuck is a public person. He constantly posts on his Instagram stories, he’s in dozens of group chats. He even occasionally makes cringy TikToks with Mark and Chenle. In a way, Donghyuck is like an open book. He’s confident in what he likes and he shares everything about himself to the world. Everyone knows Donghyuck.
Yet, Donghyuck never posts about Jeno. Donghyuck posts ten stories when at a company happy hour with Jaemin, but goes radio silent when he hangs out with Jeno. Worse, Donghyuck doesn’t talk much to Jeno when they’re out with their other friends. At any social gathering that they both attend, Donghyuck pulls away from Jeno, almost as if he’s avoiding him. And somehow even worse , Donghyuck never invites Jeno over to his own apartment.
He likes Donghyuck, and he’s so sure Donghyuck likes him back. They go on dates and they spoon when they go to sleep. They text every day. Donghyuck remembers Jeno’s favorite healthy snacks at CVS and Jeno always makes sure to stock up his fridge with Diet Coke. Jeno likes doing things for Donghyuck, whatever and whenever he asks, because he likes knowing Donghyuck needs him. And in return, Donghyuck presses himself close to Jeno on late night subway train rides, fingers curled over his jaw and adoring gaze pinning Jeno down.
“Is this not a relationship?” Jeno asks Jaemin, during their bi-weekly dinner. It’s Jaemin’s turn to choose, so they’re at an udon restaurant. “Aren’t we boyfriends?”
“Well, did you ask him to be your boyfriend?” Jaemin replies.
“He gets weird whenever I try to bring it up,” Jeno says, pushing his noodles around. “I don’t get it.”
“I get it,” Jaemin says, pointing his chopsticks at Jeno. “You’re in a situationship.”
“Situationships are for like…young people,” Jeno says, rolling his eyes. “I’m twenty-seven. People our age don’t do situationships. That’s gross.”
“Jeno, honey. This is a textbook situationship. It’s interesting though, I didn’t take Donghyuck as a commitment phobe.”
Jeno frowns. “Do you know when his last relationship was? Or how many people he’s dated?”
“Why don’t you ask him?”
“He gets weird about it,” Jeno repeats. “And I don’t want to make him uncomfortable by asking.”
Jaemin rolls his eyes. “He doesn’t talk about relationships at all, surprisingly. So I have no idea.”
Jeno hums, conflicted and confused. If Person A and Person B like each other, why wouldn’t they just make it official? What’s the point of blurred lines and gray areas when the feelings are mutual? A situationship . Jeno really doesn’t understand.
🚇
It’s been three months and sixteen days since they first met at the party, and Jeno wants to - as Jaemin had taught him - DTR. Define The Relationship.
After extensive Reddit research (“How do you define a relationship with a guy without scaring him?”), Jeno has a plan. A nice dinner, and then a nice walk in the city, and Jeno asks Donghyuck to please be his boyfriend. It sounds solid in Jeno’s mind, but the moment he meets Donghyuck at the restaurant, everything goes out the window.
Donghyuck is acting weird.
Dinner’s awkward and their conversations are stilted. They leave the restaurant and it immediately starts pouring. Unable to go on the walk as planned, they run to the nearest subway station. The platform is empty, and Jeno awkwardly glances at a silent, soaked Donghyuck.
“Are we okay?” Jeno asks tentatively.
“We’re okay.” Donghyuck’s voice is quiet.
A moment of silence, and Jeno clenches his fists. He wants to get it off his chest, he wants to let Donghyuck know how much he likes him. Although he’s not sure how the conversation will go given how unnatural Donghyuck has been tonight, Jeno can’t keep it to himself anymore.
“Donghyuck, I need to tell you something. I-”
Donghyuck shoves his wet hands against Jeno’s mouth.
“Wait,” Donghyuck says, eyes wide. “Wait. Let me go first.”
Confused, Jeno nods. Donghyuck pulls his hands back. He looks around awkwardly before looking at Jeno. He scrunches his eyes shut and opens his mouth.
“Jeno, I li-”
Their incoming subway train screeches at that very moment and rushes past them, effectively drowning out whatever Donghyuck earnestly says. He opens his eyes, looking mortified.
“What did you say?” Jeno asks the moment the train slows down. He’s not entirely confident, but he thinks he knows what Donghyuck’s trying to say. His heart thumps and he can’t hold down the growing smile on his face. Donghyuck, face flushed red, makes an indistinguishable noise before running into the subway train. Jeno follows after him, laughing. “Donghyuck!”
“I said I like you,” Donghyuck rushes out the words as soon as the train doors close behind them. He sits down and covers his face with his hands. “I like you! I wanted to say it first. Because you deserve it. Oh my god, but I’m so embarrassed, what the fuck was that timing.”
Jeno sits down next to him, and grabs his hands. Donghyuck looks at him miserably. His cheeks are blotchy red, his wet bangs fall flat on his forehead, and he smells like vanilla and rain. Jeno can’t help but kiss him.
“I like you, too,” Jeno says after. “I like you a lot. Honestly, I’ve liked you for a while.”
“I know,” Donghyuck groans, forehead resting on Jeno’s shoulder. “I’ve liked you this whole time too, obviously. I’m just stupid. And it’s so embarrassing but I have to say it. I’ve never had a boyfriend before.”
“What?”
“I’ve never had a boyfriend,” Donghyuck repeats. The train doors open at a stop, and a young woman on her phone shuffles in. Jeno’s glad that the audience in this subway car is minimal. “I know I look really confident and whatever and I am , but I’ve never properly dated anyone before and, okay, I’m a little insecure about it. I’ve never liked someone the way I like you.”
“Is that why you never talk about me? Or post about me?”
“You noticed? Oh my god. It’s silly. I just - I know I share, like, a lot of things about me with everyone. But with you, I just wanted to keep it private. For once in my life, you know? It’s stupid and I probably looked like an idiot, I’ve just never done this-” Donghyuck gestures between them two. “- before. And, every time we were with friends, I’d just get so shy. Like, wanting-to-jump-out-of-Chenle’s-apartment-window shy.”
Donghyuck is so endearing that Jeno kisses him again. Sorry to the only other person in the subway car, but Jeno pulls Donghyuck onto his lap.
They break apart when the train stops and the doors open again. Jeno squeezes Donghyuck’s waist.
“So, are we boyfriends now?” Jeno’s so happy he could honestly explode.
“Yes,” Donghyuck says, shy and soft. “Do you want to come over to my place? It’s the next stop.”
Jeno’s about to say yes, finally, please before he pauses and looks up at the screen.
“Wait, next stop? Isn’t your stop after mine though?”
Donghyuck’s blotchy red cheeks are fascinating. Jeno connects the dots and grins.
“Did you lie about your stop so we’d have more time together that first night we met? Is that why you never invited me over to your place? Donghyuck .”
“This is the worst day of my life,” Donghyuck says instead, clambering off Jeno’s lap. “I hate myself.”
Jeno laughs, getting up as well. The train rolls to a stop and the doors open. Donghyuck looks back and sticks his hand out petulantly.
“So, are you coming?” Donghyuck asks, his shy smile making Jeno’s heart squeeze. He wiggles his fingers impatiently. Jeno nods and with their hands held tight, they step out onto the platform together.